


No Shepard Without Vakarian

by Alistairs_Queen



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-06-03
Packaged: 2020-04-05 16:52:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 47
Words: 454,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19044496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alistairs_Queen/pseuds/Alistairs_Queen
Summary: This was my very first ever fan fic. I wanted to elaborate on the ending of the trilogy, but not without telling the whole story first. My Shepard was a colonist war hero who made mostly paragon decisions with a snarky attitude and the occasional renegade streak.





	1. Disaster on Eden Prime

Eden Prime. What a disaster. Jenkins, Nihlus, Ash's squad, all dead. Shepard frowned as she sat up slowly, trying to rub her eyes hard enough to scrub the images flashing across her vision and giving her a migraine. She could feel Kaidan hovering behind her as Dr. Chakwas asked her how she was feeling. "Like the morning after shore leave," she grumbled. A soft chuckle from Kaidan caused her to turn and grace him with a halfhearted smile. "What happened?" she asked turning back to face the doctor, sliding off the med bay bed and realizing she was not quite ready to be standing. She played it off by crossing her arms and leaning against the bed as Kaidan regaled her with the tale of how she'd pushed him out of the grasp of the beacon after he'd gotten too close and accidentally activated it. She remembered now. Her body rigid, muscles burning like a massive full body cramp, she'd been unable to move before the images began. Death, destruction, annihilation. It was horrible. She subconsciously rubbed her eyes again. "How long was I out?"

"Fifteen hours, Commander," Chakwas informed her in the british accent that Shepard had noticed became thicker whenever the doctor was nervous or preoccupied. "We're almost to the Citadel."

Just then, the med bay doors swooshed open and Captain Anderson stepped in. "Ah, Shepard, you're up." Kaidan saluted and took his leave as Shepard pushed away from the bed to stand at attention. Anderson waved her off, and she gladly resumed her leaning position. "Karin informed me that you were recovering quickly, but I didn't think you'd be awake yet."

"Yes sir, I'm feeling... better?" Shepard made the last word a question because she wasn't sure that was exactly the word she would have used to describe it if she could think past the migraine.

"What happened down there, Commander?" the Captain asked, the concern laid bare on his sleeve, just like most of his emotions. She'd become very good friends with her Captain since being assigned to the Normandy. He was kind and understanding, as Captains went, and she never felt she needed to be very formal when addressing him. Even now as he stood in his dress blues appraising her, it didn't feel like he was upset. His brown eyes held nothing but curiosity.

"I'm not really sure, sir. Things went FUBAR. We had taken care of the geth threat and I was radioing Joker for evac when I saw the Prothean beacon light up and Kaidan seized. I rushed to push him out of the way and was caught in the beam myself." She hesitated, unsure if she should report on what happened next. Biting her lip she sighed. Muscling forward she pushed away from the bed again. "As soon as my body froze, I was hit with these images. It sounds crazy, sir, but I believe it was a vision. Some data that was stored in the beacon about the fall of the Protheans."

Anderson frowned, but he did not seem to write her off completely. "A vision?"

"I'm not certain, sir, but it was gruesome."

A thoughtful "hm" escaped him as he looked over to Dr. Chakwas. She shrugged, pushing her short graying hair behind her ears and said, "While Shepard was asleep, I had readings of unusual brain activity consistent with REM sleep."

"So I was dreaming?" Shepard asked, her shoulders slumping.

"Well, I have no idea, Commander, but if you believe the beacon was trying to tell you something, perhaps you should take it seriously."

Anderson turned back to Shepard. "We are on route to the Citadel to meet with the Council and inform them of the death of their SPECTRE and the supposed role of another SPECTRE in his death. Do you feel like we should tell them about your vision?"

Shepard crossed her arms again. It was her go to defensive posture. "And tell them what? That I had a nightmare? They won't believe us. Let's stick with the facts for now, until we can get a feel for how much blame we will be taking for Nihlus' death."

"Yes, Shepard, I agree. Our standing with the council is unsteady as it is. I don't believe adding visions to the mix will make their confidence in humanity soar. I am also not too keen on hearing Udina's opinion on the matter." The last was said with a sparkle in his eye as he shot Shepard a lopsided grin.

She smiled back, knowing all too well that humanity's representative was a snide stick-in-the-mud who always looked like he'd been sucking on a lemon. The perfect politician if you asked her. "Nobody seems to want his opinion."

"Truer words were never spoken, Shepard. For now, I'll ask you to head up to the bridge and inform Joker that I want us docked at the Citadel ASAP."

"Sir," she saluted as he turned to leave the med bay.

As soon as he was gone, Shepard dropped her arm and started after him to carry out her orders. "Oh, Commander." Shepard turned to look at Chakwas who was holding out a paper cup in one hand and a pair of aspirin in the other. "I thought you might need these."

A thankful smile spread across Shepard's face. "You're a lifesaver, Doc."

* * *

 

Shepard made her way toward the bridge to speak with Joker, stopping along the way to have short conversations with Kaidan and Ashley so they knew she was okay. Kaidan seemed especially concerned that it had been his fault that the beacon had been destroyed. She touched his shoulder, breaking the usual Commander/Lieutenant relationship boundaries and made him look up from the floor so instead of staring at the wavy dark brown hair on the top of his head, she was looking directly into his light brown eyes. "Don't blame yourself, LT. I took one for the team, as any good Commander should." His eyes flicked up and down her as he appraised her, making her feel slightly like she probably crossed a line by touching him. When his eyes made it back to hers, he smiled and some of her tension eased. "Let's not dwell on it, okay?"

"Sure thing, Shep... Commander," he corrected himself before looking away again, a slight blush rising to his cheeks. She removed the comforting hand and nodded, walking away before she said something truly inappropriate, her own flush to her cheeks.

From the med bay she crossed the mess and passed the elevator, silently glad that she wouldn't need to ride it to get to the bridge. You'd think with all of the innovations the Turians had added to the human designs of the Normandy they could have made a faster elevator. She jogged up the slightly spiraled stairs that led to the CIC where as soon as she passed through the door to the galaxy map, Navigator Pressley and the rest of the crew in attendance turned to stare. She pressed her lips together in a formal smile as her face flushed again. It felt similar to the day she'd first stepped foot onto the Normandy as their new Commander. No one knew how to address the elephant in the room. Eden Prime was the first mission she'd botched in a long time and she was beginning to take it as a personal assault. Her gait hurried as she passed the galaxy map and made her way through the hallway comprised of crew all awkwardly trying to concentrate on their consoles instead of the tall, red headed disaster walking by. She took a moment to worry what her hair might look like. What should someone's hair look like after spending fifteen hours in the med bay because they'd been incapacitated by some ancient tech? She reached up and ran her fingers through it quickly as she waited just outside the airlock for the door to the bridge to open.

Joker sat in his Pilot's chair, humming some old Earth music to himself. She thought she recognized Green Day before he spun his chair around tapping a few last buttons before looking up at her and adjusting his SR1 cap. "Hey, Commander, so that mission went well." His sarcasm flooded the room and surprisingly eased the tension she'd been carrying since stepping from the stairwell.

She grinned at him, thankful. "Yeah, if only I'd listened to you, Joker."

"Told you it wasn't just a normal shakedown run." He shrugged. "But no one ever listens to the pilot."

"Noted. Next time, I'll patch you in to the action and you can feed us tactical advice from your comfy chair while we get shot at by geth." She gently patted his shoulder, careful not to hit him too hard. Joker suffered from a rare disease that gave him brittle bones, but that never seemed to get him down. He was the best pilot she'd ever seen and according to him he had worked very hard to get where he was, piloting the most advanced ship in the Alliance fleet.

He snorted. "No offense, Commander, but I'll believe there were geth when I see them for myself. No one has in over 200 years, you know."

"So I'm told," she said glancing out the window to watch the stars whiz by. They were currently traveling at faster than light speed to reach the Citadel as fast as possible. "Maybe I'll bring you a souvenir next time I kill one."

"Oh, yay, geth parts on my ship. Uh yeah, I think I'll pass on that." He spun his chair back around to man the helm. "We'll be dropping out of FTL soon and then docking with the Citadel."

"Good," she said, relaxing into her hip and crossing her arms. "Anderson wants us there ASAP."

 


	2. Evidence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard collects some new friends to help her hunt down evidence of Saren's guilt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've found the best way to get the whole story is to sometimes tell it from more than one perspective. That begins in this chapter as Garrus' POV comes into play.

"You can't just take me off the case!" Garrus was fuming as he stood at the top of the stairs leading down to the elevator that would take him from the Council chambers. Executor Pallin had just informed him that there was a human interest in the case he had been working on for months.

"You're out of time, Garrus. It's been too long with not enough to show for it. If these humans have some sort of proof against Saren, let them handle it. C-Sec can't be bothered any more. Resources need to be reallocated into something fruitful," Pallin sighed, recognizing the shift in Garrus' subharmonics as he became agitated.

"Stall the council," Garrus suggested, his anger barely contained.

"I can't. Udina and the human Captain are already in talks. The squad that was on the ground when Nihlus died is on their way. There is nothing to be done. Take some time to get a hold of yourself and then report in for reassignment." Pallin walked away toward the elevator.

Garrus clenched his fists, knowing that if he hadn't been in his armor, his talons would have drawn blood on his palms. A soft growl resonated in his throat as he thought of all the wasted effort he'd put into the case against Saren. He was about to turn and leave when the scent of humans tickled his nose. He glanced in the direction Pallin had gone and saw three humans making their way up the stairs toward him. He knew instantly which one was in charge without being told. She walked with an air of command that radiated off of her. The armor she wore was all black with a white lined, red stripe down her right arm. She carried a pistol clipped to her hip and a shotgun hitched to the small of her back. Her skin was pale and she had short red hair that was cut just below her ears. The most shocking feature of her presence was the bright green eyes that as soon as they fell on Garrus made him feel much more confident in the fact that maybe Saren would see justice after all if she had anything to say about it. She reached the top of the stairs and he realized when she stopped that he was blocking the path. He cleared his throat awkwardly and decided as she stared at him, those piercing eyes slightly narrowed, that he should probably introduce himself. "Commander Shepard," he greeted her, remembering the name that Pallin had given him. "I'm Garrus Vakarian. I was in charge of the C-Sec investigation into Saren."

The stiff posture she'd had relaxed as she held out a hand to him. "Ann Shepard," she said. He looked down at her hand then realized she probably wanted to engage in the human greeting that some of the races had adopted as well. He reached out his hand and placed it in hers gently, not sure of how much pressure he should be putting into this handshake. When she gripped his tightly and pumped his arm once quickly before releasing it, he allowed himself to look back up at her face as she continued to speak. "Did you find out anything useful in your investigation?" He noticed that she had a small scar that broke the hair on her left eyebrow and continued slightly upward. He was also amused to notice that she was gently marked with tiny brown specks of pigmentation that humans referred to as freckles.

After studying her face and trying to remember it for later, he replied with a bit of his agitation resurfacing. "I was bogged down by red tape at every turn. The council didn't want to admit that one of it's precious SPECTREs was corrupt. His records are all sealed and I can't get anywhere near him. I just know he's bad. How do you humans put it? _I can feel it in my gut_."

He received a smile from the human at his turn of phrase, so he assumed he either said it right or marred it so badly that she was laughing at him. She crossed her arms and looked like she was ready to speak again when the male that was following her spoke up. "Shepard, I think they're ready for us."

She turned to glance at him and Garrus appraised him quickly. He could smell the Eezo practically dripping from the man, labeling him as a biotic. Other than that, he was an average human, nothing really sticking out that Garrus noted. He turned his gaze to the other female that remained silent and stiff to Shepard's left. The armor she wore was white and pink. Awful for stealth missions he thought, but she was otherwise acting like the perfect soldier, save for the sneer she held especially for him. Her lips were full compared to the thinness of Shepard's and she had darker skin and hair. No freckles on this one and he assumed her hair was longer than Shepard's because it was knotted tightly in the back of her head. She looked away when she noticed his gaze on her and he glanced back at the biotic. Shepard nodded slowly, looking like she had wanted to ask more questions of Garrus, but she was more interested in her meeting with the council. "Thank you for the input, Officer," Shepard said, leaving her relaxed stance behind as she stepped toward him forcing him to step aside or be bumped into.

He allowed the rest of her squad to pass and watched them enter the council chambers before silently making his own way to the elevator back toward C-Sec Academy.

* * *

 

Shepard stood behind Udina at the podium, hands clasped tightly behind her back, one thumb caressing her shotgun as a holographic image of Saren stared down at her, defending himself against the claims that Udina was throwing out third hand. She was not sure which was more irritating, Udina or Saren. She felt the sour look on her face, but for the life of her could not wipe it away for her usual stoic Commander face that she used when she wanted to keep composure. When she came to the conclusion that the council was not going to listen to Udina shout anymore about how unfair they were being to humanity, she took a deep breath and stepped forward. "The information in the beacon was not completely destroyed."

"What do you mean?" the Asari councilor asked, turning her attention to Shepard as Shepard watched the expression of rage that passed quickly over Saren's holographic face.

Shepard turned her gaze on the Asari. "Before the beacon exploded, I was closest to it. The information contained inside was, for lack of a better term, downloaded into my mind. I saw what I believe to be the downfall of the Protheans at the hands of sentient machines."

Immediately after she finished her sentence, there was a snort of laughter from the hologram and Saren said, "Are we submitting dreams into evidence now?"

After the councilors exchanged glances, Turian to Asari to Salarian, the rest of the meeting went exactly as Shepard had expected it to. Revealing her vision had been a play she hadn't wanted to make, but had felt it necessary to expedite the bickering. She still had the remnants of the migraine she'd awoken with and the situation was not helping. Pinching the bridge of her nose as Anderson and Udina decided their next move seemed to help. "Are you alright, Commander?" Kaidan whispered into her ear, so close she could feel his breath on her neck.

"I'm fine," she hissed, nearly spinning around and shoving him away.

"What do you think, Shepard?" Anderson asked her, completely oblivious to the short conversation between her and Kaidan.

Shepard hadn't expected the two men to ask for her opinion on what to do next. She was a soldier, used to taking orders, not having any say. Even after her promotion, she was still only in charge when they were on the ground. Kaidan stepped in when he noticed her falter. "What about that C-Sec agent? Garrus? He seemed to want to take Saren down as much as we do."

Shepard nodded. "Yeah, we met him outside the chambers before going in, but I didn't have a chance to get a lot of information from him. Maybe if we find him, he'll let me look at his files."

"C-Sec, you say," Udina said thoughtfully. "I have a contact in C-Sec that can help you find him. His name is Harkin."

"No," Anderson interrupted. "Harkin is no good. He's crooked as they come."

Another short argument ensued between the two men while Shepard waited impatiently, to be sent on her way. Finally it was decided, much to Anderson's chagrin, that they were to head to Chora's Den in the wards to find Harkin and ask him where Garrus might be. Shepard took her leave and she, Kaidan and Ashley proceeded to the elevator that would take them to the wards.

* * *

 

Shepard stepped into the bar. One look around and the term bar was replaced with strip club in her mind. She heard an audible intake of breath behind her as Kaidan came to the same conclusion. She grinned to herself, thinking of the shade of red he must be turning. She didn't dare turn around and look because laughing at your subordinates tended to be frowned upon in the Alliance. Ashley made a noise of disgust as they walked past a table and one of the patrons reached out to grab her. Shepard stepped aside and continued on her way toward a man dressed in a C-Sec uniform. She noticed a short altercation between a Krogan and some of the bouncers toward the door that led to the offices. As the Krogan turned to leave, he noticed her watching and made a comment about not having beef with her as he pushed past to the entrance. Without a second glance at the Krogan, she stopped in front of the table where Harkin sat.

Crossing her arms as he spared her a long gaze up and down, she relaxed into her hips. "Hey, sweet thing, you come to entertain me?"

Lifting her lip in disgust, Shepard said, "Hardly. You Harkin?"

"Depends. That uniform looks good on you, but I'd much rather see you out of it," he slurred.

Kaidan shifted behind her and she held up a hand to stop him making any move to defend her. Leaning forward to look Harkin in the face she said, "Look, pal, I just need to find Garrus. Tell me where he might be and I'll leave you to your lechery."

Harkin grinned and said, "Oh, Garrus, huh? You one of those alien lovers?"

Another disgusted noise from Ashley and Shepard clenched her fists, "Just tell me where he is before I'm carrying your balls in my purse."

Harkin's grin faded into a sneer and he slammed his beer bottle onto the table. "Last I heard he was sniffing around the med Clinic in the wards." He waved his hand dismissively.

Shepard turned and marched out without thanking Harkin. The weasel didn't deserve her respect. She left Chora's Den and slowly made her way to where the map said the med clinic was. The wards were a maze and she was almost lost when she heard someone calling her name. "Hey! You're Commander Shepard! Veteran of Elysium!"

She stopped in her tracks to see a man, average in every way. Blonde hair, a goatee, and a shine in his eyes. "Yes," she said slowly as the man addressed her with a giddy laugh.

"Oh, you are so cool! I can't believe I'm meeting you. Do you think I could get your autograph?"

"Someone has a fan,"Ashley remarked, barely choking down a laugh at the look of surprise on Shepard's face.

Shepard cocked her eyebrow. She knew that the mission on Elysium wasn't exactly covert, but she didn't realize that it made her some sort of icon. "I was just doing my job."

"Please, my wife would LOVE it if she heard I had met you. If I could just get your autograph..."

"I suppose," Shepard said, gingerly accepting the pen and paper he shoved in her hands. "Who should I make it out to?" She felt her face flushing at the attention.

"OH! Conrad Verner!" the man said excitedly.

Shepard scribbled her name on the paper and wrote _to my only fan Conrad._ "There," she handed it back and he grinned widely. "I should go," she said pointing her thumb awkwardly behind her. Before turning to leave, she quickly said. "Hey, you wouldn't happen to know the way to the med clinic would you?"

Conrad more than happily pointed her in the right direction. She thanked him and as they left she heard him say to a Volus behind a counter "I just gave directions to Commander Shepard!" The Volus' response was lost in the din of the crowd buying and selling.

* * *

 

By the time they made it to the med clinic, Shepard saw that the door was locked. Strange that a med clinic would lock its doors in the middle of the day cycle in the wards. Squinting, Shepard tested the door one more time to be sure and was about to turn away when she heard a muffled shout from inside. Without thinking, Shepard lifted her wrist up to the door and interfaced her omnitool with the lock. A few moments later, she had hacked the code and the door whooshed open. She simultaneously disengaged her omnitool and pulled her pistol, training it on the first threat she saw. The man she had targeted was growling an order into the ear of a young woman with short brown hair as he held her by the throat with a pistol to her head. "You tell Garrus to keep his nose out of Fist's business."

"Shepard," Kaidan hissed, his own assault rifle aimed and his biotics primed giving him a soft blue aura. She spared a glance at some movement in her peripheral. It was Garrus, crouched behind a counter, visible from their side but not the target's.

In the space of a second, the man assaulting the woman noticed that Shepard and her crew had entered and shouted. Before he could finish the word _hey_ , Garrus had stood, took aim and blew him away. Shepard didn't have time to be impressed as the rest of the man's crew all started firing from the back of the med clinic. Garrus dropped back into cover and Shepard dropped and rolled to a stop next to him. "Good timing, Shepard," Garrus remarked, his mandibles flaring in what she assumed was a smile.

"Good shot," she retorted as she heard confusion in the shouts of the thugs as Kaidan threw a singularity at them, rendering two of them weightless. Ashley took aim with her sniper rifle and silenced the floaters. Shepard saw her shields flicker as she took a few shots of her own before hitting the deck. Shepard peered up from her cover and spotted three more enemies left. She brought up her omnitool interface and typed in the program that unleashed an electric charge wherever she aimed it. The overload made a snapping sound as it arched between two of the remaining threats, shorting out their guns and making them shout in panic as the guns overheated. As soon as she heard the successful overload, she stood up from cover and spared two shots to the two with disabled guns, taking them down. _One left_ she thought as a thumping noise sounded behind her. A short scream and she looked up over her head to see the final thug fly across the room and land in a heap at Kaidan's feet where he took the opportunity to shoot a couple of rounds from his assault rifle.

Kaidan nodded at her as he lowered his gun to signal that they were clear. She stood up from her crouch and ran to where the woman had fallen. Garrus got there first, his long Turian legs giving him an advantage. "Dr. Michel, are you hurt?" he leaned down and helped the dazed woman to her feet.

"No. Thanks to you," she replied in a thick French accent. She spared Garrus a doe eyed look which he either ignored or completely missed.

"Who were those men?" Shepard asked.

"Fist's thugs," the doctor replied. "He runs Chora's Den," she clarified with Shepard's look of confusion. "They came in asking about the Quarian."

"What Quarian?" Garrus asked.

"She came in a few days ago with a fever and a gunshot wound. She mentioned that she had information she wanted to sell to the Shadow Broker. I know Fist is one of his agents, so I pointed her to him."

"Garrus, what are you doing here?" Shepard asked.

"After we spoke, I went to patrol and heard someone was selling information about Saren. My sources led me here. Lucky they did too," he shrugged.

"So you think this Quarian has information about Saren?" Shepard asked.

"One way to find out, Skipper," Ashley said.

Shepard nodded. "As long as you're alright, Dr. Michel, I need to go back to Chora's Den and have a word with Fist."

"We had better get there quickly. I heard that he tried to get the information from the Quarian and withhold it from the Shadow Broker. The Broker hired a Krogan Mercenary to assassinate Fist," Garrus added.

"He did? That's stupid, even for him," Dr. Michel commented.

"We saw that Krogan leaving Chora's Den when we were there," Kaidan offered.

"If he was leaving, Fist is either already dead, or he had C-Sec haul the Krogan out of his bar for harassment," Garrus said. "We should go to C-Sec and see if he's there."

"A Krogan could be very helpful," Shepard mused. "But that's twice now you've invited yourself to tag along, Garrus."

The look of surprise was one that was universally readable, even on the face of a Turian. It shifted to what Shepard thought was embarrassment and then indignation. "With all due respect, Commander, this was my case first. We could help each other. You've seen how good of a shot I am." There was fire in his light blue eyes. Shepard recognized it as dedication because she saw that same look on her own face every day in the mirror.

She appraised him, crossing her arms and reveling over how fantastic the kill shot he'd taken was. She assumed he'd had some help aiming from the blue visor he wore over his left eye that was constantly speeding through readouts in Turian that only he could see. "Okay, you can come, on one condition."

"What's that?" he asked.

"If you're going to be on my team, you follow my orders," she shrugged.

"And here I thought it would be something hard," he said, a strange beat to his subharmonics that she didn't recognize. "Turians know how to follow bad orders." His mandibles flared outwards again in a Turian smile that quickly faded as he realized what he'd said.

Kaidan and Ashley both gasped at what they interpreted as an insult to their Commander, but Shepard had been in reconnaissance mode, reading Garrus' body language and trying to tell what the note in his subharmonics had been. She cocked her lips sideways and asked, "Are you messing with me, Vakarian?"

He closed his mouth and gave his own appraising look. "You're the first human I've ever met who's bothered to pay attention to subharmonics. Hmm"

Shepard heard the appreciative purr below his voice as she returned the smile he'd been giving her. "You're all right, Vakarian. Maybe I'll let you come after all." She dropped her stance and turned to leave, Garrus trotting behind her on her six and her other two squad mates following behind trying to figure out what had just happened.

* * *

 

Garrus followed Shepard up the elevator to C-Sec, feeling smothered as the other two humans watched him with harsh looks on their faces. Shepard seemed oblivious to their discomfort as she asked Garrus how he'd gotten assigned to Saren's case. He answered her carefully, trying not to slip into the comfortable biting sarcasm that he often used while he was in the Turian military. He'd almost kicked himself when he'd cracked the joke about bad orders in the med clinic. He'd gotten so excited that he'd forgotten humans had no way of interpreting the subtle changes in his voice due to the secondary language happening in his throat. All Turians knew how to tell when he was just being sarcastic. Luckily, this Commander Shepard was different. She'd taken the time to really listen. Even though she may not have heard exactly how it had sounded, that was impossible, she had calculated his intention from the expression on his face. Most humans chose to simply be insulted than to take the joke as it was given.

They stepped off the elevator into the midst of C-Sec Academy. Garrus waited for Shepard to lead him, but she stepped aside. "Lead the way, Big Guy, this is your territory. I have no idea where I'm going."

He stepped past Shepard and turned left to go up to the stairs toward where they would most likely be holding the Krogan if they had indeed escorted him away from Chora's Den. Garrus heard the commotion before rounding the corner. "If you don't stay away from Chora's Den, we will arrest you."

"You can try," came a deep booming voice.

Shepard jogged past him, having heard the voice too, with a grin on her face. "That's our Krogan," she said, not needing him to lead her any more.

He slowed his pace, allowing her to take the lead again as they approached the crowd of C-Sec uncomfortably surrounding the bulk of red armor. The Krogan was taller than Garrus who stood a good 6'8 on his own. He was proportionately wide and actually managed to make Garrus feel small. He had red head plates and red eyes that matched his armor and deep scars that dug rivulets down from his plates to his chin on the right side of his face. As Shepard bullied her way past the ring of officers and into the Krogan's line of sight, Garrus was impressed at just how imposing her presence was. For a soft squishy human that stood about 6'1 and weighed no more than probably 200lbs in her armor she made everyone around notice her without even having to raise her voice. "Who the Hell are you?" the Krogan rumbled when he saw her.

"I'm going after Fist, thought you might wanna help," she stated simply. The officers all glanced around at each other as if someone else in the group had an answer as to what to do. They obviously couldn't stop the Krogan if he decided to go back to Chora's Den, but Garrus thought a few of them were going to attempt to stop Shepard.

The Krogan glanced around at the crowd that was slowly dispersing while Shepard waited patiently for his answer. He looked back down at her and shrugged. "I suppose I can let you tag along, but you should know that I was paid to kill Fist. After you get what you need, I don't intend to leave a job half finished."

Shepard gave a shrug of her own. "I'm certain after all of the charming things I've heard about Fist, that I didn't see a damn thing."

The Krogan let out a short laugh of amusement. "Urdnot Wrex," he said by way of introduction.

"Ann Shepard," she held out her hand, as she had with Garrus, and the Krogan took it and nearly yanked her off her feet as he shook it.

"Let's not waste any more time with these pyjaks," Wrex boomed, starting back toward the elevator.

Shepard turned toward Garrus and the other two humans and spoke quickly before Wrex could get away. "Garrus, I need you with me. Kaidan, Ash, I need you to go back and wait at the Normandy." Protests flew and were quashed as quickly as they came. "I can't babysit everyone and the Krogan is like having 5 more people to watch. Go back to the Normandy, that's an order." Ashley waved her hand dismissively as she turned away and Kaidan gave Shepard one last look that asked _are you sure_ which she answered with a steadfast glare. When they had both gotten onto the elevator leading to the docking bay, she happily backhanded Garrus on his chest and grinned, "Come on, Big Guy let's get our Quarian."

"You know, Wrex is bigger than me?" Garrus purred and he jogged behind her to catch up with Wrex.

"Size isn't everything," she quipped, slipping into the elevator before Wrex could pound the button to close the doors. Garrus chuckled and decided he liked this human.

* * *

 

Chora's Den was a shit storm. Shepard was crouched behind the bar in the middle of the room, trying like hell to repair her shields. They'd been taken down by a mounted turret near the ceiling in the middle of the room. She heard Garrus' flanging voice over her comm. "You alright, Shepard?"

"Peachy," she grunted as she input the final command to bring her shields whizzing back up around her.

"What?" he asked, confused by her human turn of phrase.

She heard Wrex shout a battle cry as he stood up out of cover and charged one of the bouncers that were positioned around the circular room. She chuckled and said, "It means I'm fine, Garrus."

"Couldn't you just say that?" he grumbled as she saw him line up a shot with his sniper rifle and down another.

"Then I wouldn't get to hear you sound all confused," she remarked shooting over her head before beginning the overload sequence to take out the turret so she could move from her tiny spot of cover.

"Because confusing the sniper is the way to stay alive in a gun fight," he retorted.

Another bellow from Wrex as she finished the program and aimed at the turret. "Deploying overload!" She shouted to be sure Garrus was out of her line of fire. After the satisfying explosion of the turret, she said, "You should know that the only way to stay alive in a gun fight is to bring a knife." With that, she stood up from behind the bar and rushed one of the goons closest to her. Instead of shooting, she brought up her omni blade and buried it in his gut before shoving him away and ducking again.

She could hear Garrus chuckling as he sniped another bad guy. Shepard was amazed at how well they were working as a team. She'd never worked this closely with aliens before and in her eyes they were just as good as a seasoned team of Alliance soldiers. Garrus took orders easily and Wrex didn't need orders. He was his own juggernaut and Shepard was content to let him do as he pleased as long as he didn't get into her line of sight.

They made their way toward the back of the club where Fist had fortified himself in his locked office. The first locked door was easily hack-able and Shepard made short work of it. When it whooshed open, her and Wrex both aimed shotguns and Garrus had an assault rifle swapped from his sniper rifle faster than she had thought possible. The two men standing guard looked like they were ready to shit themselves. Shepard raised her hand as she felt Wrex tense to take the shot. With a soft grumble, he lowered his weapon. "Does Fist really pay you enough to deal with this guy?" she cocked her head toward the Krogan in question.

The men exchanged looks and the one farthest from Wrex said, "Let's get out of here. I never liked Fist anyway."

After they were out of ear shot, Wrex said, "It would have been quicker to just kill them."

"Probably," was all Shepard said as she continued down the hallway toward the locked door to Fist's office.

She got frustrated, trying to hack the lock open. She was going to have to requisition an upgrade for her omnitool if she was going to be breaking into mob bosses offices regularly. Giving up, she yanked open one of the packs on her belt and slapped omnigel onto the door control. The lock shorted and opened immediately. Shepard drew her pistol, taking stock of her surroundings. There was a 5' long hallway she was standing in that led to a blind corner that she was not fond of. Pressing her back to the wall, she peered around the corner into the office where Fist was hiding behind his giant desk. Seeing he was all alone, she cautiously stepped out, pointing the gun at him. "I'm not going down without a fight!" Fist shouted, slamming his hand on a button that called forth two turrets on either side of the room.

"Crap!" Shepard shouted, her heart jerking in a flash of fear. She sprinted for the dip in the wall on the opposite side of the room from where she had entered. Before she could get there the turrets clipped her shields again and brought them crashing down with the sound of broken glass. Slamming herself into cover she immediately began feverishly tapping on her omnitool to charge her overload. She noticed Garrus doing the same thing from his cover on the entry wall. Wrex surprised her by starting to glow blue with a biotic field. That was news to her. Culling her shock, she finished her program and shot a look to Garrus who nodded that he had finished as well. They each released their overload into the turret closest to them, blowing them both as Wrex grabbed Fist with his biotics, snatching him from cover and slamming him on the ground before Shepard. Shepard placed her boot on Fist's chest. "We need to talk about a Quarian."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Fist spat, struggling under her foot.

Shepard leaned more weight onto Fist and said, "Look, pal, I'm having a hell of a day and I need information that I know you have. Now start talking before I turn you over to Wrex to use as a chew toy."

Garrus cleared his throat to cover his chuckle and Shepard almost lost her composure as Wrex harrumphed. Fist seemed to buy the threat though because he stammered out something about setting up a meeting with the Shadow Broker. "Nobody meets the Shadow Broker face to face," Wrex offered. "Even I was hired by a third party."

"The Quarian don't know that," Fist said then gasped as Shepard applied more pressure with her foot. "Look I don't know where she is, but I know where you can find her."

He gave them a location and Shepard removed her foot. "Now, was that so hard?" she asked.

Fist didn't have a chance to reply before his face exploded, the sound of the shotgun making her jump. She turned and glared at Wrex, but he had warned her. Wrex shrugged and holstered his shotgun. Shepard couldn't read the expression on Garrus' face, but she thought it might have been a mixture of amusement and horror.

"Come on, let's go find the Quarian," she said as she turned to leave. Squatting, she picked up a data disc and stuffed it in her pocket before walking out. You never knew what might come in handy in this galaxy.

* * *

 

Shepard moved quickly as the meeting time closed in on her. If she didn't make it in time to save the Quarian from Fist's people, she might never get the proof she needed to nail Saren. Garrus and Wrex were right behind her the entire way, silently sharing her urgency. They came to the top of some stairs that led into the alleyway where Fist had told them to go. She stopped short when she saw a motley group of people congregated below. In the middle stood the Quarian easily discernible by the environment suit she was wearing. A Turian approached her, looking her up and down before running a talon down the side of her hood and over her shoulder.

"Where's the data?" he asked her as she slapped his hand away.

"No, where's the Shadow Broker, where's Fist?" she retorted, her voice pitched and accented but also changed by the filters of her helmet.

"They'll be here," the Turian said, trying to touch her again.

"No way, deal's off," the girl threatened, recognizing that she was in trouble.

Before Shepard could rush in and help, the girl dropped a smoke bomb and dashed away in the confusion. Shepard took the opportunity to take out the threats all around. She pulled out her pistol and knocked off a few shots before Garrus and Wrex joined her, finishing off the rest of the gang that had filled the space. When the smoke cleared, Shepard stood amidst the corpses and looked to the direction the Quarian had run, hoping she wasn't going to have to track her again. Shepard sighed in relief as the girl came timidly from around the crates she'd hidden behind. "You okay?" Shepard asked.

"I think so," the girl replied. "If you don't mind me asking, who are you?"

"I'm Commander Ann Shepard of the Alliance. This is Garrus Vakarian, C-Sec, and this is Urdnot Wrex. He doesn't have a title that I'm aware of." Wrex growled softly, but didn't otherwise complain. "We came to find you, hoping you had information that might implicate Saren was working with the geth."

The girl fidgeted at the mention of the geth, but given her people's history with the machines, Shepard wasn't surprised that there was some discomfort. "Perhaps we should go somewhere less exposed."

Shepard nodded. "I'll take you to my people's embassy."

 


	3. SPECTRE Elite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the evidence against Saren, Shepard is given the authority to hunt him down.

The Quarian's name was Tali'Zorah Nar Rayya and she had the evidence that Shepard needed to do what needed to be done. According to Tali, she had caught a geth unaware and away from the rest and killed it, stripping it's memory chip before it fried. There was an audio clip with none other than Saren's voice proving he was not only working with the geth, but that he had gone rogue and was working to bring back an ancient race of sentient machines called the Reapers. The Reapers had been responsible for the destruction of the Prothean race 50,000 years ago and had since disappeared, falling into myth. Udina ushered Tali to the council to present her evidence. As Shepard caught up, they were listening to the clip again.

"There can be no question," the Turian councilor said. "Shepard was right, Saren has gone rogue."

"Even more disturbing is the other voice on the recording," the Asari councilor said sighing.

"You recognize it?" Shepard asked, announcing her presence.

"It it Matriarch Benezia herself," the councilor nodded. "A very powerful person among the Asari people."

"Well, if she is helping Saren, then there is bound to be trouble," Udina spat. "What is going to be done to prevent the destruction of any more human colonies?"

The councilors exchanged looks and the Salarian spoke up. "Saren will be stripped of his SPECTRE status and shunned."

"That's not enough," Udina howled.

"Most human colonies are settling in the Terminus systems. The council will not risk all out war just to track down Saren and bring him in. Sending our ships in is not a risk we are willing to take," the Asari councilor sighed.

"I can track down Saren," Shepard volunteered, stepping forward. "I know you were evaluating me for SPECTRE status before Nihlus was killed. If Saren finds this 'conduit' he mentioned, we're all screwed. Give me the title and I will work as your arm in the Terminus systems."

There were whispers all around from curious bystanders at the prospect of a human joining the SPECTRE elite. It was unprecedented. With a few more glances exchanged between the councilors, they nodded. "Alright, Commander Shepard, Step forward."

As the ceremony unfolded around her and she was announced as the first ever human SPECTRE, Shepard felt a sense of pride wash over her. Ever since she'd been rescued from the burning farm on Mindoir, she'd done all she could to help as many people as could be saved. She had wanted to be just like the Alliance soldiers who had found her clutching the bloodied knife, huddled in the corner of the barn as far as she could get from the body of the Batarian she had killed after he'd tried to take her. They had been so calm and brave as they coaxed her out, taking the knife and leading her to safety. She wanted to try and be sure that never happened to anyone else. Now, as a SPECTRE, her reach could extend as far as she wanted it to, but first, she needed to find and stop Saren. To make things easier, Anderson stepped down and handed over command of the Normandy to her, stating that it was only fair to give her a ship and a crew that she was familiar with.

* * *

 

Shepard left the council chambers, still in shock, barely realizing that the people she'd picked up along the way were still following her. She stopped to take a breath, inhaling the scent of cherry blossoms from the trees. A soft metallic voice cleared their throat beside her, breaking her out of her reverie. "Excuse me, Commander Shepard." It was Tali.

The young Quarian was wringing her hands nervously as Shepard turned her gaze to meet the purple hue of her helmet. Her eyes like tiny pin pricks of light were the only things visible as she returned the look. "Yes, Tali? What is it?" Shepard asked, gently approaching the girl and laying her hand on her shoulder.

Tali visibly relaxed, her hands dropping to her sides and she said, "I was wondering if I could come with you on your hunt for Saren. Nobody knows more about the geth than me and you know I can fight. I want to help."

"What about your pilgrimage?" Shepard asked, glad for the help, but not wanting to distract the young woman from her purpose.

"I am sure that while fighting geth alongside a human crew, I will be able to find something to bring back to the flotilla." Shepard thought she heard sarcasm and a smile in Tali's voice, but it was impossible to read her expression.

"If you are comfortable traveling with us, I won't turn down the help," Shepard agreed with a smile.

"Do you really think you're going to hunt down Saren without me?" Garrus asked from behind Tali.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Big Guy. C-Sec won't mind you taking off to chase after a rogue SPECTRE on a human ship?"

He chuckled. "No offence, but C-Sec can wrap it up in red tape and shove it where the sun doesn't shine."

She wrinkled her nose and gave her own chuckle, "Ugh, Garrus, that is very offensive." He shrugged and she turned her attention to Wrex. "What about you Mr. Strong Silent? Are you coming?"

"Not if you call me that," he grumbled. "But it's better than what I had planned anyway."

"Good! Alliance uniforms all around!" she joked, turning away with some of the weight of the universe lifted, knowing that these aliens were all coming together to help her.

* * *

 

On her way back to the Normandy, Shepard allowed Garrus and Wrex to go off and collect anything they might need to bring with them. When she offered Tali, the girl had shrugged and said she traveled light, opting to stay with Shepard while she stopped at the SPECTRE requisitions officer to hopefully buy some upgrades for her omnitool. Tali helpfully steered her away from the model she had been looking at to another for way fewer credits. "I can tinker with it later and make it at least 75% more efficient," Tali said, a hint of pride in her voice.

"I'm glad I brought you with me Tali," Shepard smiled, handing the cheaper model to the clerk and grabbing up a few weapons mods to boot.

Garrus was already waiting at the elevator when they left the shop with a duffel bag slung over his shoulder. "Where's Wrex?" Tali asked, looking around and bouncing on the balls of her feet. To see better over the people crowding around. She was about 5'6 making Shepard feel like a giant next to her small frame, much like Shepard felt around most other females. Even Ashley was no taller than Tali.

"I saw him board the elevator as I left my old office," Garrus assured her. "He's apparently eager to go."

"So am I," Shepard said as the elevator door opened and they piled in. "Oh, Shit!" The elevator door burst back open, a screeching alarm voicing its complaint as Shepard dodged back out. "You two go on ahead, I forgot something. I'll meet you on board."

The two gave her confused looks but agreed to go on ahead. Shepard almost kicked herself as she rushed to the closest grocery. She needed to set up regular deliveries of Dextro rations and food for her new alien crew. Standing in the elevator, the only levo among the dextros, she had remembered they couldn't eat the same foods as her and the others without allergic reactions. Burning bridges before you built them was generally a bad idea. After working a deal with the clerk for regular deliveries, Shepard walked out with a crate of dextro food to hold them over for the time being. She made her way back to the elevator knowing she probably looked stupid in full N7 Alliance armor carrying a crate of dextro rations, but she wanted to personally be sure that the initial deed was completed and that they wouldn't be taking off without food for two of her crew. Who knew when their next stop over would be. Sometimes traveling to other systems could take weeks.

Halfway up in the elevator, she set the crate down and tapped her foot. These elevators were worse than the Normandy's. When the doors finally opened she bent to pick up her crate and stepped off the elevator directly in the path of Anderson and Udina. "Shepard," Anderson greeted her, raising an eyebrow. "We saw that you've elected to take on some new crew members."

"Yes Captain, those three were invaluable in the hunt for evidence," she said, shifting the crate in her arms.

Udina sneered. "Need I remind you that this is a Human vessel?"

"No," she replied, giving him her own look of distaste. "Need I remind you that I am a _council_ SPECTRE and as such I can recruit any person I choose, no matter what planet they are from?"

Anderson couldn't hide his chuckle as Udina turned and stormed off. "We came to give you some intel that might help in your hunt," he said, taking the crate from her and leaning it on the guard rail.

"What have you got for me?" she asked, stretching her shoulders and settling into her hips.

"There have been geth sightings in several clusters and I think you should start with the most concentrated. Reports indicate the planets Noveria and Feros are teeming. Another thing is that Saren's accomplice, Matriarch Benezia, has a daughter. Her name is Liara T'Soni and she is a renowned Prothean expert."

"Protheans?" Shepard asked, her interest piqued. "She might know something about the beacon and my vision, maybe even what the 'conduit' might be."

"Precisely," Anderson agreed. "She was last known to be on a dig in the Artemis Tau Cluster. We don't have a specific system, but scans should make it easy to find her."

"I think I'll start there, sir," Shepard motioned for him to give her back the crate. She took the weight back and smiled. "When we have more time you will tell me why you really stepped down."

He returned the smile, "When do we ever have time Shepard?"

She turned and stepped into the airlock of _her_ ship. It still felt strange. The Normandy was hers. When the tedious decontamination cycle was finished, Shepard took the left out of the airlock. Joker was waiting for her in his pilot's chair as usual. "Hey Commander, I heard what happened to Anderson. He survives a hundred battles and is taken down by backroom politics."

She sighed, setting the crate down in one of the chairs beside Joker. "It feels wrong to be giving the orders here. Kind of like I'm stealing the ship from him." She crossed her arms and looked out the windows toward the docking bay.

Joker grinned at her. "Well, for whatever it's worth I'm with you 100%. I can open the intercom if you want to say something to the troops."

"I suppose I should let them know the situation," she sighed and leaned forward to hold down the button that would allow her to speak across the entire ship. Taking a deep breath, she spoke from the heart. "This is Commander Shepard. We have our orders, find Saren before he finds the conduit. I won't lie to you crew, this mission isn't going to be easy. This began with an attack on a human settlement in the Traverse, but we know Saren won't stop there. His geth armies aren't going to stay on the far fringes of Citadel space. Our enemy knows we're coming. Wherever he searches for the Conduit, we'll be there. We will hunt him to the very ends of the galaxy and bring him down. When we go into the traverse, Saren's followers will be waiting for us. But we'll be ready for them too. Humaity needs to do this. Not just for our own sake, but for the sake of every other species in Citadel space. Saren must be stopped and I promise you all, we _will_ stop him." The words flowed from her as she felt her own drive to make her crew accept her.

"Nice speech, Commander," Joker grinned tapping a few pre flight buttons. "So where are we headed first?"

"Anderson gave me a lead on an Asari who might know some information about the mission. We need to head to the Artemis Tau Cluster and run some scans to find her location."

"Whenever you're finished collecting stray aliens, we can go," he quipped.

Shepard grinned. "Let's get this bird in the air." She gave Joker a soft pat on his shoulder before collecting her crate and heading for the mess hall.

This trek through the CIC was not any less embarrassing. Only this time it wasn't disappointment on the crews' faces, it was awe. She felt every eye on her as she headed for the door to the stairway down. When the door whooshed closed behind her, she allowed herself a short sigh of relief. "You alright, Commander?" She yelped, nearly dropping her burden. Garrus was there, chuckling as he steadied her. "Sorry, didn't mean to startle you."

How she had missed the nearly 7' Turian was beyond her. He took the crate from her and she said, "It's okay. Just wrapped in my own thoughts I suppose. It feels strange, you know. I don't think I'll ever get used to them seeing me as some type of hero."

They started down the stairs together and Garrus hummed in his throat. "Just imagine after you stop Saren and save the galaxy."

She scoffed. "Yeah, sure. Thanks for the reminder." She pointed to the left as they came to the bottom of the steps and Garrus carried the crate full of rations to the mess hall where he deposited it on the counter of the small kitchen. "I got you and Tali some rations and snacks. I nearly forgot that I was bringing dextros on an Alliance ship."

He dug through the crate, his mandibles spreading. "This is thoughtful, Commander. Most humans wouldn't have bothered to even remember, let alone personally requisition rations."

"You're part of my crew now, Big Guy." She leaned on the counter across from him, studying his expression as he picked through the crate. Shepard was interested in making sure she could read her people. During a combat situation, it was necessary to be a fluid team than didn't need to shout at each other to know what to do next. She intended on spending a lot of time with each member of her ground team as they made the trek to the cluster to find Dr. T'Soni. The only one she really knew anything about was Kaidan, and that had to change. Working with aliens was going to be a challenge that she was more than ready to step up to the plate and work on. Humanity was part of the galaxy and even being the newest space flying species they were swiftly climbing to the top of chain of command. "So, would you like a tour?"

He looked up, that Turian grin still spreading his mandibles. "Of course. You know, the Normandy is designed in a very Turian style. I didn't know humans ran a ship the way we did."

"Normally they don't," she admitted. "The Normandy was part of a knowledge exchange between humanity and Turians. Co-built. She is one of a kind. We have a stealth system that hides our heat emissions when we need to. Unless someone looks out a window, we're invisible to scans. We also have a specialized eezo core. I don't understand the mechanics behind it, but I'm sure Engineer Adams would love to talk your ear off about it."

She frowned and cocked her head to the side as she used the human expression and he held up a hand to silence her question. "No need to apologize, Commander. I'm familiar with the expression."

* * *

 

Garrus decided he was going to follow this human Commander in a rush of emotion after she'd been named the first ever human SPECTRE. When he'd stepped foot on the Normandy, he'd been in awe of the beauty in which she was designed. It was like a perfect melding of human and Turian ingenuity. They were going to catch Saren in style. An aging human male with hardly any hair on his head had greeted him, Tali and Wrex as they'd entered the bridge from the airlock. He welcomed them to the ship with a sour look on his face and hurried them through the CIC and down to the mess. He'd left them with a nervous look on this face, barely letting them know that he was XO Pressly and if they had any questions that he would answer them. "Humans," Wrex had grumbled as he'd left the mess to explore. Tali bounced off after him and they'd both disappeared. Garrus stood alone among a few humans who quickly scurried off to other business when he had moved to introduce himself.

The male biotic who'd been with Shepard when they'd met was sitting at a console typing furiously. Garrus approached him cautiously. When the human felt him approach, he looked up and after a brief moment, he cocked his lips in a grin. "Hey, Garrus, right?" He stood from the console and held out his hand. Garrus took it, more sure of his handshaking skills now that he'd done it a few times. "Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko. So I heard you Shepard and the Krogan got Chora's Den shut down while they find a new manager."

Garrus chuckled as Kaidan dropped his hand. "Yeah, it was mostly Wrex."

"Welcome to the crew." Kaidan looked back down at his console and rubbed his forehead. "Now I need to wrap up this report so I can unwind."

"Sure thing," Garrus said and gestured a thumb over his own shoulder. "I think I'll go exploring a bit."

Just then, Shepard's voice came over the comms of the ship, and she made a speech about the mission and finding Saren. Garrus listened to her impassioned words as he made his way slowly through the mess and towards the stairs to the CIC. He was interested in taking a look at the Galaxy Map. He'd never seen an interface quite like it, but the XO had ushered them so quickly past it that he was certain the man didn't want him to get any closer. As he neared the top of the stairs, he heard the doors ahead close and a soft human sigh. He rounded the curve in the stairs and saw none other than Shepard carrying a large crate and looking slightly pinker in her cheeks than he remembered.

His greeting startled her and he quickly moved forward to grab the crate before she dropped it. She seemed to quash whatever emotions she'd been struggling with as they made their way back the way he had just come. She led him back to the mess and explained that she had disappeared to requisition some food for him and Tali. Garrus was impressed. He shuffled through the crate seeing not only rations, but a wide assortment of other snacks and treats that were higher quality than he even bought for himself most of the time. He couldn't help grinning as Shepard rattled on about the Normandy. They talked mostly about the ship as she led him around, pointing out some people and explaining which parts of the ship were where. She seemed to be avoiding the elevator like the plague until she finally ran out of things on that level to show him. With a sigh, she pressed the button to call the elevator. The door slid up and they stepped on. "Going down," she grumbled, smacking the button for the cargo hold.

Garrus immediately found out why Shepard had been avoiding the elevator. It crept slowly down, trapping them in the confined space for what felt like forever. It reminded him of some of the elevators on the Citadel. Some body language translated across species and as Shepard crossed her arms and tapped her foot, settling into her hips, he recognized annoyance. He also noticed that she was still in full armor. "So are you going to wear that all of the time?" he asked with curiosity.

"Hm?" she asked, snapping out of whatever thoughts she'd been stewing in as the elevator trundled along. She uncrossed her arms looking down at herself and seemed to only then realize that she was still in her armor. "Oh, right. My locker is back upstairs. In fact, I think I inherited a cabin when Captain Anderson stepped down. I just haven't had the time yet to settle in. Honestly, I forgot. What about you? Do Turians live in their armor? I know you are very military minded."

He looked down at his own chest where he still wore his black and blue C-Sec uniform armor. "I brought some civvies, but I guess I haven't had time to settle in either." Just then, the elevator stopped and the door lifted to deposit them in the cargo bay. It consisted of one large room. To their left was a row of lockers that ran toward the front of the ship and at the end of the lockers was a weapons bench. He recognized the other human female that had been wearing the white and pink armor standing in front of the bench, meticulously cleaning a pistol. She was now wearing very similar clothing to the uniform that Kaidan had been wearing when they'd spoken. To the right was an empty wall with an Alliance issue Mako ground vehicle parked at the far end. It looked like it was in sore need of some attention. Garrus hummed in appreciation. "Commander, if you don't mind, I think I'll set myself up down here with the Mako." Shepard followed him over to the vehicle as he laid a hand on the metal of the hull.

"You like tanks, Big Guy?" she asked, a grin spreading across her face.

"I spent most of my free time in the military tinkering with the ground vehicles and calibrating their weapons for optimal performance." He shrugged. "It's a hobby. I haven't seen this model in years. I thought they'd discontinued it."

Shepard frowned. "If you can get this hunk of tin to maneuver better, you'll be my best friend, Vakarian."

"I'll do what I can, Commander."

"Okay," she said, stepping back and looking around. "The workout room is that way," she pointed then pointed again in the opposite direction. "and engineering is that way. Feel free to pick an empty locker and make it your own. Pin up some pictures of Turian boy bands or Asari strippers or whatever you're into. I'm going to go get cleaned up and I'll be back to see how you're settling in." The last was said with a casual wave of her hand as she backed away toward the ridiculously slow elevator.

"Sure thing Shepard, although, Asari just don't do it for me." He let the comment fall and she chuckled.

"Turian boy bands it is," she closed one eye then spun on her heel to leave. He interpreted the expression as what humans called a wink. He immediately turned to the Mako and brought up his omnitool interface to get to scanning the almost ancient piece of equipment.

He felt the other female's eyes on him as he worked, but she did not attempt to introduce herself. He got the impression that she had a slight case of Xenophobia that was shared with a few of the other human crew members. He shrugged off the feeling of her watching him and ignored it, hoping that his performance might help change her mind about aliens.

* * *

 

Shepard closed herself in the elevator and began unclipping some of her armor. If she was trapped in the damn thing, she might as well use the time productively. She had nearly all of the pieces off when the door finally slid open and allowed her to step off into the hallway leading around to the mess and her new Captain's quarters. She was halfway to her old bunk when she remembered that she wasn't supposed to be using it anymore. She stopped, sighed and turned around to head back to her cabin. It still felt strange to be taking over Anderson's space.

When the door whooshed open, she glanced around at the small room. It was modestly furnished with everything she might need. A desk and console were placed against the wall to her right. The bed was also on the right side of the room, with a full size mattress covered in regulation gray trimmings. The rear of the room had a door that led to her personal bathroom. Shepard dropped her armor next to the table to the left to be cleaned after her shower. She noticed a dresser beside the door to the bathroom and opened the top drawer. She'd been provided with new uniform sets and some casual clothes emblazoned with the N7 logo. Searching the drawers, she realized that her truly personal items were still probably situated at her old bunk.

She closed the drawers after removing a pair of sweats and a t shirt and dropped them on the corner of the bed. She stepped into the bathroom and activated the shower. Stepping into the luke warm water was as close to heaven as she was going to get. She showered thoroughly, washing the sweat and grime of the day from her skin. After showering, she stepped out and dried off, tossing the used towel over the door of the shower to dry. Then she pulled on the clothes she'd picked out, resigning to go pick up her belongings before anything else. She knew no one else was aware, but going commando was uncomfortable. She slipped from the Captain's cabin feeling refreshed and headed toward her old bunk and locker. Halfway there she heard a familiar voice. "Hey, Commander."

It was Kaidan, sitting at a console, probably having just sent off his report. He sat back in his chair and clasped his fingers over his stomach. Shepard took a moment to admire his body as she turned and approached him. There were rules in the Alliance about fraternizing, but there was nothing that said she couldn't look. He seemed to notice the flick of her eyes and his smile widened. "Kaidan, how's it going?"

"I just wanted to get up to speed on what's going on with the mission. There's been no formal debrief and I don't like feeling left in the dark," he said.

She crossed her arms and felt sheepish. "I guess the debriefs are up to me now," she said. "I'm sorry, Kaidan. I haven't even been in charge for two hours and I already messed up."

He sat up quickly, all sense of relaxation gone from his body. "I didn't mean it that way, Shepard. You can lead us however you see fit. I just wasn't on the ground team so I'm a little lost. You didn't do anything wrong. You've got a lot on your plate."

She relaxed slightly at his encouraging words. "Still, I'm sorry. I'm going to collect my things. Did you want to tag along and we'll talk?" He stood up, tugging his uniform shirt down. She suddenly felt under-dressed and the realization hit her that she was very much without under clothes. Leaving her arms crossed over her breasts, she thanked whoever was listening that the t-shirt was black and the temperature aboard the Normandy was not too cold. They started toward the crew bunks his shoulder brushing against hers as they walked. "So what can I tell you that they left out of the announcement?"

"Well, I saw that we have a few more crew members than before," he alluded, allowing her to explain.

She shrugged. "I figured we could use all of the help we could get against Saren and the geth. Tali asked first and a Quarian against geth is just suitable. Garrus is an excellent shot and apparently knows his way around a Mako, and Wrex, well he is like an organic battering ram." She stopped at her bunk, inputting the combination to her locker and grabbing the small duffel from the bottom.

Kaidan looked amused as she snatched her underwear from its place and shoved it unceremoniously in the duffel, followed by her old uniform and some tech pieces and weapon mods she had been tinkering with. Accepting her words, he asked another question. "What is this conduit thing you mentioned?"

"I honestly don't know," she said standing and clutching the duffel over her chest. "We are heading to the Artemis Tau cluster to possibly find someone who might know something about it. She is supposedly a Prothean expert. I'm hoping she can help me interpret my vision."

"About your vision," he began, his face softening to an expression of pity. "I know the signs of a migraine when I see one. I get them all of the time because of my implant. I'm an L2. Are you feeling alright?"

"An L2?" she asked. "I'm sorry, I really don't know much about biotics. Is there something wrong with your implant?"

"Well, most biotics are implanted with the new L3 models, but I was implanted a long time ago when I was a teenager in Brain Camp. The L2 models are prone to side effects. I got off easy. I just get migraines. Some of the kids take seizures, develop brain tumors, but I was asking about you."

She offered him an encouraging smile. "I'm fine, Kaidan. Dr. Chakwas gave me some aspirin after I woke up. It seems to have worked."

He returned her smile. "Good, I'm glad."

The silence they shared after was pleasant. Finally, she cleared her throat, hefting the light duffel and said, "I guess I should get these things back to my cabin. We'll talk later?"

"Sure no problem. I'd like that," he agreed stepping aside so she could pass. She hadn't realized how close they had been standing to each other, Kaidan nearly pinning her to her locker. She inched by and quickly returned to her cabin.

Once inside, she leaned against the door, a deep sigh escaping her. She needed to be careful or she was going to wind up breaking regs with a subordinate. Kaidan was a soft touch who wore his heart on his sleeve. Generally she fell for bad boys, but Kaidan was so mysterious and caring that being attracted to him seemed like second nature. She stripped off the casual clothes she had chosen and opted to change into something a bit more formal to do her rounds. She was determined to get to know her crew as well as she could, but visiting them in civvies didn't feel proper on her first day as their highest ranked CO.

After her uniform was on, she rolled up the sleeves and quickly brushed her hair, letting it fall where it willed. Remembering her conversation with Garrus earlier, she decided to skip him on her rounds but quickly looked up the phrase "Good looking male Turians" on her omnitool, knowing that no such thing as Turian boy bands was likely to exist. Taking the first five pictures that answered her search, she spliced them together and made up a name for her fictional band. After adding some glitter effects, she admired her creation. Frowning, she noticed that most of the men in her photo shared characteristics with Garrus. Was he considered good looking to the females of his species? The color of their skin, the shape of their mandibles, the length of their fringe was all very similar. She'd never bothered to note any of these things before, but in the interest of building bridges, now she was curious. Shrugging and deciding to do more research later, she sent the photo to Garrus' omnitool with a short note saying S _o you don't get lonely under the hood of the Mako._

* * *

 

Garrus felt like he'd been fiddling with the Mako for hours. There was no end to the seemingly insignificant repairs that needed to be done to the poor engine. He enjoyed the monotony of calibrating it so that is was just right for the next time Shepard took it ground-side. He secretly hoped she'd take him with her on her next mission so he could see how his work suited her. Just as he reached for his omnitool to input some more calculations, it pinged him that he had a message. He slid out from under the Mako where he'd been lying on the floor adjusting the shocks on the middle axle. Sitting up, he opened the message which was from Shepard. Reading the translated text, he scrolled down and snorted laughter as he saw the picture she'd sent him. There was a collection of male Turians standing side by side, clearly spliced together and assaulted with a glitter effect that made the whole thing sparkle. The word she'd typed above them didn't translate, but he didn't need to read it to know it was probably something emasculating. He saved the picture to his archives so he could get a good laugh whenever he needed it. After, he sent a quick note back, letting her know he'd gotten the picture. _Thanks, it was getting cold under here._

Soon after, he heard the elevator descending to the cargo bay and glanced over to see who'd arrived as the door lifted. Shepard stepped out, finally out of her uniform. Her scent hit him across the room, cherries and vanilla with an underlying fragrance that was simply her. All humans had their own chemical mixture that he usually used to distinguish one from the other, but he was making an effort to use his eyes instead of his nose. He thought she might head over toward him when her gaze fell on him, but she simply acknowledged him with a wave and strode over to the other female. Her gait was lighter out of the heavy uniform, but she still towered over the other female by at least a half a foot. The shorter female greeted her with a smile that she had not seemed to think the aliens of the crew were worthy of. Garrus made an effort to ignore the conversation because he didn't want to be rude, but he could hear every word. Turian hearing, like their sense of smell was much better than humans. Because he couldn't help it, he heard Shepard try to get to know the other female but in the end wound up chastising her for being a bigot. "Give them a chance, Ash. No matter what planet we're from, we're all still just people."

"Sure thing, Skipper. You want me to jump, I'll ask how high, you tell me to kiss a Turian and I'll ask which cheek," the woman said, making Garrus chuckle to himself. She was obviously unaware he could hear them as he continued to fiddle with the Mako's calibrations.

"That's the spirit, Chief," Shepard said, a small chuckle embedded in her own tone. Did Shepard know he could hear them?

He turned slightly to watch her walk away from the girl, who Garrus forced himself to remember was named Ash. She passed the lockers with confidence and stopped in front of Wrex who was leaning against the wall of the ship, his arms crossed. He was obviously not in the mood to talk, but Shepard insisted, fearlessly telling him not to be an ass. Finally he told her a short story about his time as a merc and she left him alone, insisting that she would be back. Wrex resumed his position against the wall with his arms crossed as Shepard disappeared around the wall toward Engineering where he assumed Tali had set herself up. He hadn't seen her since they'd been left by Pressly in the mess hall. He went back to his calibrations after Shepard was out of sight. He didn't smell her come back until almost a half an hour later. She graced him with another amenable smile before pressing the button to open the elevator door. He spared a moment to wonder why she hadn't come to talk to him. But when she disappeared onto the elevator, he realized she was probably busy. There would be plenty of time to get to know each other at another time.

 

* * *

 

Shepard's stomach growled as she waited for the elevator to finish its ascent. Suddenly she was well aware that she had not eaten since before they landed on Eden Prime. Her stomach complained again as she entered the mess and smelled something cooking that smelled delicious. She saw Kaidan standing behind the stove, tending to whatever he was making. "What is that heavenly smell?" she asked, approaching from behind.

He turned to acknowledge her and grinned. "I learned to cook back in Brain Camp," he said. "Nothing too fancy, but I can hold my own." He dipped the spoon he was stirring with in the pot and pulled it out, offering her a taste. "My dad's chili recipe."

She took the offered spoon in her mouth, allowing him to tip the contents onto her tongue. "Damn, Kaidan. That's good." She said, savoring the flavor.

He offered her a smile and said, "You want a bowl? I made plenty. In fact, I think I may have gotten carried away."

Nothing sounded better. She gladly accepted, pulling a bowl from one of the cabinets over the stove, forcing him to step aside as she reached across in front of him. "Do we have hot sauce?" she wondered aloud, rummaging in the other cabinets.

"Ah, Shepard, you're gonna ruin it," he complained as she triumphantly found the bottle of hot sauce and shook it in his face.

"I won't add it to the pot," she assured him. "I just like my food to have some extra spice."

"Cretin," he mumbled, pulling a ladle from a nearby drawer and handing it to Shepard to serve herself.

She spooned out some of the chili into her bowl and snatched a stack of saltines from another shelf. Finding some shredded cheese in the refrigerator the sprinkled a bit on top and went to sit at the long table where the crew usually took their meals. Kaidan soon joined her with his own bowl, sitting across from her. They talked a bit until Ashley made her way up from the cargo bay with dinner on her mind too. Kaidan told her to help herself and she thanked him before grabbing a bowl of her own. As they ate, the rest of the crew began to filter in. Most of them took advantage of Kaidan's giant pot of chili, joining them at the table. Conversation reached an uncomfortable stand still when she saw Garrus and Tali come around the corner from the elevator.

No one spoke and Shepard chafed under the silence. She saw Tali begin to wring her hands and before she could turn and flee, Garrus placed a reassuring hand on her back. Tired of the silence, Shepard spoke up. "Hey, Big Guy! I see you decided to peel yourself away from the Mako to join us for some dinner. I'd offer you guys some chili, but you know... levo food. Tali, I think there is some of that special sanitized stuff among the rations I bought earlier." She punctuated her sentence by pushing out the chair next to Kaidan with her foot.

Garrus grinned, gently pushing Tali forward as he made his way toward the kitchenette. "You know, I am pretty sure I saw some graxen buried in that crate earlier."

"Whatever the hell that is," Shepard waved her hand dismissively.

"It's more of a snack than a meal," he said as he rummaged through the cabinets, looking for where the dextro foods had been stored. "Maybe similar to this stuff I saw a lot of the human C-Sec guys eating on movie night."

"Popcorn?" Shepard asked, spooning another mouthful of the chili into her mouth.

"That's the stuff. Looked disgusting, I tried not to pay too much attention." He raised up, finding what he had been looking for and handed a box to Tali.

Slowly the rest of the crew began to start up their own conversations again, allowing Shepard to release the knot of tension that had balled up in her chest at their reaction to the aliens in their midst. "I dunno, Vakarian, some of the stuff in that crate today looked deadly. I wouldn't knock popcorn if I were you. It's very popular."

"I'll take your word for it, Shepard," He moved from the kitchenette to sit in the chair she'd pushed out. Kaidan scooted over, giving him room to sit comfortably and Tali joined the table at the chair next to Shepard.

"I appreciate the effort you've put out for Garrus and me," she said, taking a kit from one of the pouches at her belt and beginning the process of filtering her food so she could enter it into her suit environment without risking contamination.

Shepard shrugged. "You're part of my crew now. I want to make sure you're all comfortable."

"Speaking of which," Garrus said, that tone in his subharmonics returning that she now knew was sarcasm. "I hung the picture you sent me under the hood of the Mako. Not uncomfortable at all."

She chuckled and Kaidan asked, "What picture?" She thought she heard a twinge of jealousy in his voice.

"It's kind of an inside joke," she said. "Not really important."

"Oh," Kaidan said, stirring his chili around with his spoon.

Garrus cleared his throat and spoke up again. "Anyway, I don't know who had control of the that poor Mako, but the alignment was seriously messed up. It should handle much smoother now."

"Thank goodness," Shepard sighed, scraping the last of her chili from the bottom of the bowl. "That thing is so hard to steer."

"No offense Commander, but that has nothing to do with the alignment," Kaidan said, the grin returning to his face.

"You trying to say I'm a bad driver, Alenko?" she asked, mildly insulted, but still taking the joke as it was meant.

"I would _never_ say you were a bad driver, ma'am," he said, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"Ugh, and I ate your chili," she said. "Betrayal."

"Well I have to get back to it," Ashley said, standing up and taking her empty bowl back to the kitchen.

"You sure, Ash?" Shepard asked, knowing that Ashley was not a fan of the aliens on the crew.

"Guns don't clean themselves, Skipper," was her response as she headed back for the elevator.

"Was it something I said?" Kaidan asked, looking worried.

"No," Garrus answered for her. "Chief Williams is a little... wary of her new shipmates."

Shepard felt her cheeks flush. "So, you _could_ hear us."

"Turians have remarkable hearing, Shepard, and you were right across the cargo bay." he confirmed.

"I'm so sorry," she said. "I don't mean to talk about you in front of your face."

"You didn't say anything that offended me," he assured her. "I was trying not to listen, but I'm pretty sure Ashley wanted me to know how she felt."

Shepard dropped her face in to her palms. "I knew there were a few people who felt that way, but I was hoping as we worked together that their feelings might change. How am I supposed to run a cohesive unit if some of us can't accept the others' presence?" She rubbed her temples then set her palms flat on the table, wishing she could pass her unease to the table through her fingers.

"You're doing great, Commander," Kaidan offered. "It's only the first day. You see that Ash was the only one who left the mess." Shepard had enough sense to pull her hands away and cradle them in her lap when she saw Kaidan moving to reach for her. What could he be thinking in the middle of a crowded mess hall?

"Thanks, Kaidan, I appreciate it. I think I'm going to get some rest. It's been a long day," she excused herself, unable to look at Kaidan and the lost puppy look he was giving at her rejection. Garrus watched the whole exchange with interest, and Tali seemed engrossed in her decontamination ritual. Shepard carried her bowl to the dishwasher and placed it next to Ash's before wrapping up the cracker sleeve and putting it back in the box. She made a hasty retreat to her cabin afterward to try and get some sleep.

* * *

 

Garrus felt bad for making Shepard leave the mess hall, but he wasn't certain that it had all been his fault. He'd seen Kaidan reach his hand toward Shepard's in an effort to comfort her, but she'd pulled away like a spooked pyjak. He wondered if there was something going on between the two humans. Fraternization was expected and encouraged on Turian ships, but he was certain he had heard somewhere that humans had some silly rule pertaining to the subject. He went about his meal, ignoring the silence around him. Soon, most of the crew had finished their meals and left. A few stragglers remained, engaging in small talk and he noticed that Kaidan was oozing pheromones. It had been covered up by the other humans scents and Kaidan's own smell of eezo. Now that they were practically alone, he could smell the rush, pouring from the man. He took a moment to wonder if he would smell the same coming from Shepard when Kaidan was around. Making a note to find out, he finished his food and bid Kaidan and Tali goodnight.

As he rode the elevator back down to the cargo bay where he'd set up his bunk behind the Mako, Garrus heard a pleasant chirping from his Omnitool saying he had a message. He opened the short note from Shepard that simply read _sorry._

He frowned, wondering what she was apologizing for now. As he stepped from the elevator, he replied with _for what?_

Shepard's response was quick. _I only want to make sure I'm doing everything right. I'm new at the mixed crew thing and I don't want to screw this up. I actually like all of you asshole aliens and I want to keep you on._

He chuckled. _You're doing nothing wrong in my book, Shepard. These things take time. It's been a few hours. Relax. This asshole Turian isn't going anywhere._

It was a few minutes before she responded and he thought the conversation was over until her message came through. _Why does your opinion matter so much?_

Garrus honestly didn't know what to respond with, so he opted for sarcasm, hoping to make her laugh. _Because I'm a badass who can fix your tank and shoot a rifle all while watching your six._

The response he received was not one he expected. _I never want anyone else on my six ever again, Big Guy._ He was debating on what to say next when his omnitool chimed again. _You don't need to respond to that. Ignore me._

Instead of sarcasm he decided to go with heartfelt this time. _If you ever want to talk, Shepard, I'm here if you need me._

He didn't get a response back and he was hoping he hadn't crossed a line. Putting the incident behind him, he got himself ready and laid down to sleep.

 


	4. Volcanoes and Asteroids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard finds Dr. T'Soni, and then is waylaid by a distress call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are hints in this chapter pertaining to underage, inter-special rape.

As the weeks passed on their way to find Dr. T'Soni, Shepard made it a routine everyday to seek out each of her crew members and have a conversation with them. Most of them could be found in the same places all of the time as they went about their duties. Kaidan was never far from her cabin or the med bay, Joker always in his pilot's seat, only occasionally coming to the mess to share a meal with the rest of the crew. She often found Ashley maintaining their armory or modding weapons. Wrex stuck to his corner of the cargo hold. Garrus she always found hovering over the Mako and tweaking something here or there. Tali practically lived in engineering, making fast friends with Engineer Adams. As she settled into her Command, she became more relaxed, learning about everyone's past and doing her best to learn their cultures and customs.

She found herself one afternoon leaning against the Mako as Garrus wiped his hands on a rag that was already covered in oil. She had her arms crossed and he was chuckling about the story he'd told. She was just about to push off the Mako and take her leave, letting him get back to work when he set his rag down and said, "You know Shepard, I think I've shared all of my best stories while you just stood there listening. Is there anything you want to share? This friendship thing works both ways I'm told."

She pushed off the Mako and scoffed, waving her hand dismissively. "Oh, Garrus, my life is boring. No one wants to hear about the farmer's daughter from Mindoir."

"Farmer's daughter, huh?" He gave her a Turian smirk, one of the plates on his forehead above his right eye lifting as the right mandible pulled slightly away from his cheek. "I heard somewhere that human men find farmer's daughters sexy."

She snorted at the goofy look on his face. "Hardly," she said. "Nobody noticed me until after I joined the Alliance."

"That's surprising. You kind of stick out in a crowd, Shepard. I mean, your hair for one thing." He paused, appraising her head with those deep blue eyes of his. "So weird."

"What's wrong with my hair?" she asked, reaching up and trying to flatten it in case it was standing up.

"You mean besides the fact that it's hair? It's kind of... loud." He said, choosing his word after a short hum in his subvocals while he thought. "Am I saying that right?"

"You know most human females put a lot of effort into their hair. It impresses the men folk," she joked, accepting his appraisal. Her curiosity got the better of her and she had to ask. "What do Turian men find attractive in a female, since you don't have hair?"

"It's all about the fringe," he purred jokingly.

"Anything else?" She asked. "Like humans pay attention to hair, but usually its all about the ass or boobs"

Garrus looked her up and down, his expression she interpreted as the closest thing he could muster to wrinkling his nose, the segments of the bridge of his nose pressing together. His mandibles pulled tight to his face. "Shepard, no offense, but humans have weird tastes in which parts to sexualize. Any good Turian knows that its all about the hips."

"So I take it that you don't find Asari attractive either?" Shepard bullied ahead, trying to steer the conversation as far from her past as possible. "Most species do."

"They have a nice fringe," he shrugged, "but that isn't what they call it. Other than that, no not really. Some Turians might, but not me. They're too blue." The last was a joke, she could tell from the tone in his voice.

"You got a lot of nerve with all those blue tattoos, Vakarian." She'd been meaning to ask him about the markings on his face. Most Turians had similar markings, but the colors and designs were all different as far as she could tell. His were fairly simple. There was a line that filled in what Shepard called the bridge of his nose. It spread across his cheeks below his eyes with sharp, geometrical edges at each turn. The design stopped and picked up again just below where his mandibles met his cheeks giving an upside down Y shape as it traced the shape of them, stopping sharp in the middle of each mandible.

"First of all they're not tattoos," he smirked, crossing his arms over his chest, his mandibles fluttering with what she thought was amusement. "It's paint. They're clan markings. They identify which family I belong to."

"So all Vakarians have the same markings?" she asked, a strong urge to reach out and touch them making her cheeks redden.

"Mmhmm," he rumbled in his chest watching her carefully as she clenched her fists. "You can touch them if you want, Shepard. I don't bite. On one condition..."

She frowned, not expecting him to read her quite so easily. "What's that, Big Guy?"

"Can I touch your hair?" He looked embarrassed, not meeting her eyes. He turned his head away his profile accenting the sharp fringe that grew from his head where humans would have had hair. All male Turians had a fringe made up of three spikes jutting dramatically from their heads and four smaller spikes, two per side, that simply stopped at the back of their heads. Shepard had never seen a female Turian in person. She wondered if they had a similar fringe. She hadn't paid much attention in biology in high school.

She shrugged. "I guess. It's just hair."

His eyes lit up at the prospect and she watched him take his gloves off. Shepard had never seen Garrus without his gloves. Turian hands were so different. They only had three fingers each and each finger was tipped with vicious looking talons. Shepard found herself curious to study them further and wishing she had something else for Garrus to touch in exchange. He reached slowly for her head and she ducked a bit to make her hair more easily accessible. She moved in closer to him to reach up and press her finger tips to his face. She started just below his eyes, surprised by the hardness of his skin. She traced over to the space where his mandible attached to his cheek then followed the pattern down. She'd always thought a Turian's mandibles looked fragile, but now that she was feeling it for herself she knew how wrong she'd been. She was lost in the experience not even noticing that he was mussing her hair with vigor. "Its so soft," he marveled as he took to petting it forward into her face. She giggled, a sound she hadn't made in years. "What was that?" he asked, chuckling at the noise. His mandibles spread and banged into her still open palm.

"Shut up, you," she playfully punched his shoulder, ducking away from his hands as he attempted to push her hair forward again.

"You know, you can touch my plates too," Wrex's voice boomed across the cargo bay, a hint of teasing in his tone.

Shepard snorted, rubbing her hands through her hair to attempt to flatten it back down. "I think I've had enough alien anatomy lessons for one day."

"Just let me know when you're in the mood, Shepard," Wrex teased again as she backed away from Garrus who was laughing hysterically.

"Sure thing, Wrex," she laughed, escaping into the elevator and pressing the button to go up.

* * *

 

Scans reported that the nearest Prothean dig site was located on Therum, so Joker set the course and they jumped to FTL. It wasn't long until they would be arriving and Shepard started her routine of getting ready. She buckled all of her armor into place and checked her seals. The air on Therum was breathable, so she opted for her tactical visor in place of her helmet. Re-checking all of her weapons, she brought along her shot gun and her pistol. She took the long elevator ride down to the lockers where the rest of her team waited. "Alenko, Vakarian, suit up, you're coming with me."

None of the rest of her team protested, although Tali hung her head in what Shepard thought was disappointment, and Ash wore a sneer on her face. Shepard had chosen these two because of Garrus' knowledge of the Mako and Kaidan's biotics. It was a tactical decision and she was a little upset that some people were taking it as her playing favorites. That just wasn't the case.

Her ground team quickly assembled themselves and the three of them climbed into the Mako, ready for Joker to announce they were ready to drop. "God, I hate this part," Kaidan muttered as he clutched the handle that hung from the roof of the vehicle.

Shepard wrapped her hands around the wheel and readied her boot over the gas pedal. "Get ready for drop in 10," Joker's voice came over the comm in the Mako.

"It can't be that bad," Garrus scoffed as the cargo hatch opened with a hydraulic groan.

"You haven't seen Shepard drive," Kaidan commented as Joker gave the okay and Shepard slammed her boot down on the gas.

"Why do you think I brought you along, Alenko?" she asked, a devious smile lighting up her face. "I didn't forget that comment at dinner our first night out of dock."

The Mako lurched forward and out of the airlock into mid air. Shepard whooped as they fell, laughing at Kaidan's face as it turned a light shade of green. She kept her foot on the gas as the ground sped toward them. The Mako slammed down and after a few feet of drift over the rocky terrain, she removed her foot from the gas and slammed on the brakes. They all flew forward and then back as the tank stopped quickly, Shepard still laughing. Her blood pumped quickly as her heart sped with adrenaline. The drop was her favorite part of every mission that involved the Mako. "And here I thought you brought me for my charming good looks and my awesome biotics," Kaidan said, now that he'd swallowed his heart back down into his chest.

"You wish, Alenko," she teased, turning to make sure Garrus was alright. "Everything good back there, Big Guy?"

He was tapping on his omnitool and he looked up to grin at her, his mandibles spreading and blue eyes shining with a shared excitement. "The systems survived, but I'm not sure about my insides. Could we retrieve my heart on our way back after the mission?"

Shepard laughed harder and put her foot back on the gas to start down the path that her navigation said would eventually lead her to the dig site and hopefully the Asari.

* * *

 

Garrus sat behind Shepard and Kaidan, maintaining a watch on the Mako's systems while simultaneously trying to keep his lunch in his stomach. Kaidan had been telling the truth about Shepard's driving. It seemed impossible for her to go in a straight line. She swerved back and forth on the path as she hummed some Earth tune to herself. Every now and again she would come awfully close to the edge of the road, making Kaidan inhale sharply and clutch what Shepard kept calling his 'oh, shit' handle. It didn't help things that they were surrounded on both sides by a river of lava. Shepard seemed confident and Garrus forced himself to repeat a short mantra in his head. _I trust Shepard_. Every now and then she would glance down at her radar to confirm she was still headed in the right direction. He noticed her glance down again and this time, she took her right hand off the wheel to tap the screen, a small frown on her face. The Mako veered left and she quickly corrected back to the center of the road. "You picking this up, Big Guy?" she asked, just as Joker's voice sounded over the comm.

"Hey Shepard, we've got geth signatures in orbit, watch yourselves down there."

"Shit," she grumbled as they heard the sound of engines pass over their heads. "We've got a drop ship, people."

Garrus slid across to man the guns on the top of the Mako. Shepard slowed the tank making it blissfully easier to aim as he peered at the targeting computer. "Well, at least we can pretty much say for certain that we're on the right planet," Kaidan remarked as they approached the first target along the road.

With Garrus on the main gun and Shepard throwing overloads out the window she had opened to take out their shields, the geth were falling pretty easily. "Shouldn't I drive?" Kaidan finally asked as they swerved all over the road, Shepard concentrating on her omnitool between glances at the road.

"It's fine, I've got this," she said, sticking her arm out the window again and setting off another overload.

Soon they approached a bend in the road and Garrus got a bad feeling. "Wait, Shepard."

She slammed her foot down on the brakes and Kaidan sighed, grateful at the momentary reprieve. "What is it?" she asked looking around quizzically. He heard her heart-rate elevate as she prepared for something to jump out at her.

"Around this curve, they have mounted turrets," he said, taking readings with his visor. "Three or four of them. We'll never make it going in head on."

He watched Shepard scan the area with her own visor and she pointed to the right. "There! An alternate route. We can sneak in the back and take them out. Only one turret down that path." She turned the wheel and gunned the Mako down the much more narrow path. As they approached the turret, the thick shielding around it came down to allow it to fire at them. Garrus used the heavy ammo that he'd been saving back to hit the turret, severely damaging it. Then he peppered it with the smaller ammo while the large cannon cooled down. The turret whined loudly and then exploded before it even got a shot off to damage their shielding. "Nice work," Shepard said as they continued to zip down the path.

As they sped into the clearing surrounded by pre fab buildings that likely housed the turret controls as well as the gate controls, geth swarmed the Mako. Shepard grinned and slammed into the nearest Prime as it turned slowly to try and fire on them. A mechanical screech sounded as the Prime went flying. The rest of the geth had gotten too close for Garrus to shoot with the mounted gun, so he pulled his sniper rifle from his back and opened his own window. Shepard gleefully backed the Mako over a few more geth and then slammed her foot down to go forward again, turning the wheel as far as it would go to the left and driving in small circles, mowing down any geth in her path. With Garrus sniping as best he could in the moving vehicle and Kaidan shooting short bursts from his assault rifle, they soon had taken down as many geth as were there. Shepard pulled the Mako as close to the exit gate as possible and parked it. "Let's get this gate open," she said, pressing the door release and jumping out of the vehicle. Garrus was right on her heels, Kaidan close behind, his biotics flaring in anticipation.

Garrus kept his eyes peeled for any movement, but nothing was left. He stepped over geth parts as they made their way to the closest structure. He couldn't help but smile. Sure, he'd seen Shepard in action before and he'd been impressed, but now that he knew her and was getting better at reading her expressions and body language, it was much easier for them to work together. This was their first real mission and they were blowing through it like it was nothing to be met by hundreds of geth at every turn.

As she approached the door, Shepard drew her shotgun and glanced behind her to make sure she was covered. Garrus nodded and she ducked inside. He was close behind, but she still saw the lone geth before he could say anything. Her shotgun blast resounded inside the metal building and the geth fell with another of those screeching wails he'd heard several times over the last few hours. "God, I hate that noise," Kaidan remarked. Garrus couldn't help but agree. The sound was piercing.

Shepard approached a nearby console and scanned it. She brought up the control panel and proceeded to hack the terminal until she heard the gate outside begin to recede into the ground. "Piece of cake," she said picking her shotgun back up and moving past them to go back out to the Mako.

They continued on their way to the dig site, coming in contact with the occasional geth patrol. At one point, Shepard decided to ram an armature so hard that she launched it into the lava along the side of the road. Garrus didn't know whether he should feel impressed or panicked as she stopped just short of following the geth into the boiling pool. She backed up and continued on the path with him silently begging the spirits that she wouldn't try that again. Their next obstacle was a narrowing of the walls on the sides of the road. They didn't reach very high, but the opening was too narrow for the Mako to fit. Kaidan made to get up, but Shepard held up a hand. "We're not going to fit," Kaidan pointed out while Shepard's eyes narrowed and she mumbled to herself, much too softly for even Garrus to hear.

Finally, she gripped the wheel and Garrus said, "Shepard?"

"Hold on," she warned as her foot came down as hard as she could onto the gas. Just as they were about to ram into the edges of the narrow opening, Shepard hit the jump jets on the left of the Mako, throwing their left side into the air. The tank careened through the opening as Shepard lodged the wheels onto the wall, revving the engine and slowly inching the Mako through the opening on its side. Once they'd cleared the obstruction, she leaned all her weight to the left and Garrus did his best to help. The tank finally found it's center of gravity and fell back onto its wheels.

"Shepard, what the hell?" Kaidan asked from his side of the car after they came to a stop.

"What?" she asked, shrugging her shoulders. "We might need the cover. I'm not going in on foot unless I have to."

"You're crazy, Shepard," Garrus added. "I like it." She turned and winked at him, a smile showing her pride.

Kaidan proceeded to cross his arms and slouch down in his seat to pout while Shepard rolled her eyes and proceeded down the path.

Shepard had been right to make sure they had the Mako. When they reached the entrance to the dig site, another drop ship appeared in the sky over head. The ground shook as the mechanical monstrosity landed and began to open up. "Colossus!" Shepard shouted, backing the Mako up to firing range. Garrus made use of the heavy ammo again, firing rounds as quickly as he could without over heating the system. Meanwhile, Shepard and Kaidan concentrated on the smaller geth surrounding them. "Dammit, Kaidan, slow that thing down I can't get a shot into it!"

Garrus felt the air thin as Kaidan's biotics flared around him in the small space. He threw his arm out the window, grabbing hold of the geth that was hopping quickly from one wall to the next and causing confusion. As soon as he had a hold of it. Shepard aimed her pistol and shot the thing through its one glowing eye. They made short work on the others as Garrus eroded the Colossus' shields. It was sending plasma waves into the Mako, taking their shields lower and lower as well. Shepard let out a frustrated growl and he heard her mumble something. Kaidan protested, trying to grab hold of her. "Shepard, no, don't." but she was too fast. She sprung the door open and hopped out, pulling the grenades off her belt. She scurried to take cover behind the Mako as the Colossus sent another plasma wave toward them.

As soon as the wave hit, Shepard shouted, "10 seconds, Vakarian!" And took off towards the giant geth. It saw her, but the downside of its size was its inability to move very quickly. Garrus watched her dart underneath the thing and quickly slap sticky grenades to each of its 4 legs and one on its undercarriage. Then she was hauling ass back toward the Mako, typing frantically on her omnitool. "Shoot it now!" she shouted. Garrus hesitated, knowing she was not quite out of range. "Now!" she shouted again and his training took over. Without a second thought, Garrus pulled the trigger, his heavy ammo rocketing out to slam into the Colossus, just as Shepard smacked her hand over her own wrist to detonate the grenades.

He saw her shields fall as the blast radiated outwards, hitting her and knocking her down. "Shepard!" he shouted, panicking as she flew out of range of his sight under the Mako. He was out of the tank before he knew he was moving, Kaidan hot on his heels. He called her name again, his panic clear in his subharmonics.

His ears were ringing from the sound of the blast as he ran toward where she'd fallen. As the smoke cleared and he began to be able to hear again, he heard laughter, broken by a fit of coughing, a groan and then more laughter. "Nice shot, Big Guy," she called, her voice ragged.

He approached her when he spotted her lying on her back, knees in the air and arms splayed on the ground above her head. He didn't smell blood and his nerves immediately calmed down. "Yeah, well be thankful I didn't listen the first time. You were way too close you insane human." He reached down and offered her a hand up which she gladly took.

She brushed herself off as Kaidan ran up to them, "Are you alright Shepard?" he asked, the panic still in his voice.

"Fine," she coughed again, leaning her palms on her knees as she caught her breath. "My shields took most of the hit."

"You could have killed her!" He wheeled on Garrus, his biotics flaring around his fists. Garrus took a defensive stance, not wanting to hurt Kaidan, but not looking forward to a biotic punch in the face either.

"Hey, Hey," Shepard stepped between them, pushing them both to arms length. Garrus stepped back willingly, but it looked like she had to put pressure on Kaidan's chest to move him. "Kaidan, I trust Garrus. He knew exactly when to take the shot. He wouldn't hurt me."

Kaidan tore his gaze from Garrus and he looked at her. Garrus suddenly realized that she was about and inch shorter than the other human, but that didn't stop it from feeling like she was looking down on him. Kaidan seemed to shrink under her gaze and his biotics melted away. "Sure, yeah, you're right Shepard. Sorry, Garrus."

"No harm done," Garrus shifted, relaxing his stance.

"Now that the Colossus is dead," Shepard said dropping her arms. "We can head inside before reinforcements show up."

She headed toward the door that opened up into a long, round, metal tunnel that descended steadily. Garrus couldn't help but feel claustrophobic as they made their way down. Finally, another door opened up into what looked like a hollowed out mountain. The rock walls were shaped to make narrow paths that zigzagged down even further into the area, occasionally interrupted by metal railed catwalks. At the end of one of these catwalks, Shepard stopped them at an old rusty looking elevator. She pried open the grate and stepped inside, the green light emitted by the operating button showing an inviting grin on her face in the dimly lit area. "I'm going to learn to hate that look, aren't I?" Garrus asked, gingerly testing the sturdiness of the elevator with one foot before stepping on.

"Love it or hate it, you begged to come with me," she quipped after Kaidan had joined them. She pressed the button and the elevator jerked then began a very slow descent. "God, and I thought the elevator on the Normandy was slow," she complained, rapidly continuing to press the button as if the elevator would go faster. "I should have let Garrus toss me over the side, I would have fell faster." She nudged him in his ribs with her elbow, a stupid grin on her face.

As they approached the bottom, Garrus began to notice signs of destruction in the scaffolding. The elevator jerked to a sudden halt, the shaft blocked by rubble. "I guess this is our stop," he said, forcing the grate open and hopping down to the closest catwalk. Shepard landed next to him, followed by Kaidan.

As they moved in formation, Shepard in the lead, he heard a soft female voice calling out. "Hello? Is someone there?"

Shepard drew her pistol and continued forward, Garrus following her lead and he heard Kaidan do the same. They came upon a wide opening that was blocked by a huge barrier. Behind the barrier, suspended in mid air was and Asari. Her face looked strained as Shepard reached out a hand to test the barrier. She jerked it back as Garrus felt a jolt in the air. "Are you Dr. T'Soni?" Shepard asked, shaking her hand.

"You just had to touch it, "Garrus said so softly that only Shepard could hear. She shot him an annoyed look before the Asari answered her question.

"Thank the goddess, yes. I didn't think anyone would find me. Can you get me out?"

Shepard crossed her arms and glared up at the Asari. "Before I do that, I need to know if you're working with Saren and Benezia."

"My mother? No. I have not spoken to her in years. Please, You must get me out of here. There are geth," the girl pleaded.

"We're well aware of that Dr. T'Soni, but I have to be sure you're on our side before I let you out," Shepard insisted.

"I am not working with my mother. As I said, we have not spoken in years. I heard geth and saw a Krogan warlord, so I tried to lock myself behind the barrier. I must have pressed the wrong button because I was trapped. I had almost given up hope that someone would find me. Please, I will submit to any questions you have or you can lock me up if you wish, as long as it is not alone in here."

Garrus saw a tear forming in the girl's eye. She was legitimately terrified. "I think she's telling the truth, Shepard," he whispered.

Shepard nodded and addressed the girl again. "How do we release you?"

The look of relief on the Asari's face was wrenching. "You will need to find a way past the barrier. The controls to release me are on this side."

"We'll be back," Shepard assured her.

They picked their way down to what looked like the bottom floor. As Shepard looked around for a way inside, Garrus heard the distinct sound of geth approaching. "Shepard," he warned, lifting his assault rifle and scanning the area.

"I hear them," she confirmed raising her own pistol. "They're blocking our sensors. No radar." They moved slowly, nearly back to back, Garrus trying to see everything at once. Kaidan suddenly let out a shout as one of the hoppers nearly landed on top of him. Shepard spun and fired off a round, missing the hopper as it shot back up toward the ceiling. "Damn it."

Garrus then saw two troopers making their way towards them. He aimed and loosed a few rounds into the face plate of the nearest one, hitting just the right spot to short its mechanics. "It's gonna blow!" he warned as the geth seized and whined. The explosion was loud in the echoing cavern and Garrus cringed as Shepard turned to watch the exploding geth take out the one next to it as well. He saw her eyes focus on something behind the smoke, squinting to see better. She touched her visor for a better reading of whatever she was looking at.

Kaidan was frantically trying to get a hold of the hopper with his biotics, but it kept dodging behind outcroppings in the walls to escape. Garrus lowered his rifle and brought up his own omnitool to overload the hopper as Shepard took off in the direction she'd been looking. "Shepard!" Kaidan called after her.

"Take care of that thing! I have an idea!" she shouted back, her omnitool already glowing as she ran.

Garrus decided to trust her and continued with his overload program. Within seconds, it was primed and he aimed for the hopper. It landed on the ceiling, then immediately made for the opposite wall. His visor tracked where it would land and he swung his arm to the spot and waited a millisecond as it flew through the air. It dropped right where his visor had calculated it would and he activated the overload before it could hop away again. The geth sparked and hesitated, giving Kaidan the chance to grab it with his pull and bring it into scope. Garrus quickly ended it with a shot to the chest. Kaidan's biotics immediately receded and he took a deep breath, leaning on his knees. Garrus could smell the sweat on him as he struggled to maintain composure. "My amp is overheated. Go see what she's up to," Kaidan waved his hand in the direction that Shepard had run.

Garrus hesitated, but saw no immediate threat in the area, so he sprinted off after Shepard. He rounded a corner and saw her standing behind a console, typing in combinations of code. There were three dead geth surrounding her, each with its eye light shattered by a bullet. She grumbled and spoke softly to herself as she worked, growling in frustration each time the console fired back with a negative response. He approached her, cocking his head and trying to figure out what the contraption was that she was trying to hack. "It's a mining laser," she said before he could ask. "I'm trying to get it to overheat so it will take out that wall under the barrier. Urgh, but it has a firewall like I've never seen." She kicked the stand and shoved her hands through her hair.

He stepped forward, moving her aside and took a look at the console. "Omnigel won't work," he concluded, more talking to himself than her as he worked through the problem. He hummed in thought as she stepped up beside him.

"Maybe if you take that side and I do this one, we can trigger it simultaneously," she mused reaching across his front to point out the trouble spots in the code.

"That just might work," he grinned, pulling up his omnitool.

They both typed out their programs and prepared to hack the laser. Shepard had aimed it downward toward the pile of rock two levels below where Dr. T'Soni was still suspended, waiting for them to rescue her. "Ready?" she asked just as he finished.

He nodded and touched his omni tool to the console right next to Shepard's. Their combined hack fired off and the mining laser whirred to life. Warning lights flashed and she backed away, wrapping her tiny human hand around his upper arm and pulling him with her. The beeping of the warnings became one long ringing sound as the laser reached capacity and fired off a concentrated beam toward the rocks. He saw her shield her eyes as the rocks not only exploded, creating a hole in the ground, but they disintegrated in a bright flash. When the smoke cleared, she was already heading toward the crater. He jogged up to join her and Kaidan stepped up next to her, no longer breathing hard, but his face scrunched up in a pained expression. "Geez, Shepard," he said, rubbing his forehead.

She took a moment to glance at Kaidan and he saw concern wash over her. "You okay, LT?"

He nodded, cringing. "My amp overheated. I'll be fine."

"You sure?" She stepped a little closer, her eyes glued to Kaidan's.

Kaidan offered her a small smile then gently touched her upper arm. "I'm fine, Commander."

After a few more moments studying him, she pressed her lips together and nodded. Garrus inhaled, catching Kaidan's pheromones as they floated in the air, mingling with Shepard's own scent of attraction. Cinnamon. So she did have feelings toward the Lieutenant. Garrus felt a strange twisting in his gut, but didn't have time to even wonder what it was about before Shepard was trotting toward the tunnel.

Getting to the doctor was easy once they were in the tunnel. It snaked to a set of stairs that led up to the enclosure where she still hovered. "How do we shut this thing off?" Shepard asked walking cautiously up behind the Asari.

The small blue woman craned her head as far as the stasis would allow her. "How did you get in here?" she asked. Her voice was gentle and she sounded, for lack of a better word, young.

"We overloaded the mining laser and blasted a hole through the rock," Shepard answered stepping up to another ancient looking console to the left.

"Oh, yes, that makes sense. The console behind me should let me free." Shepard nodded and touched a few buttons and suddenly, the Asari dropped with a small 'oof' as she hit the ground. The barrier fell as well and she stood up, brushing her hands off on her green lab outfit. "Thank you," she said turning to face them. Garrus finally got a chance to really see her. Her skin was a light shade of blue, her eyes a bit darker. The crests on her scalp were speckled with the Asari version of freckles which were lighter than her base skin tone. She also had less densely arranged freckles on her cheeks below her eyes that were darker than her skin like Shepard's were. Her lips held a lavender hue. Garrus supposed she was pretty as he watched the two humans with him both stare in awe at her.

Shepard stepped up closer to her. "Is there another way out of here?"

"Yes I believe so. The central chamber has what I believe to be an elevator that leads all of the way to the surface," she said in that same soft tone.

Just then, the floor beneath their feet rumbled. Garrus spread his feet apart to balance himself and watched the others hold out their arms to do the same. "What the hell was that?" Shepard barked when the ground stilled.

"The mining laser must have triggered a seismic event. The whole place is unstable," the Asari said, panic in her soft voice.

"Then let's get out of here," Shepard said heading back toward the central chamber. They all followed her and the Asari began activating the controls that would operate the elevator. Shepard opened her comm to the Normandy. "Joker! We have the doctor and we need evac. Can you get a pinpoint of our location?"

"Roger Commander, we have you. ETA 8 minutes." Joker replied.

"He needs to go faster," the Asari said.

Shepard ignored her and tapped her foot, her arms crossed over her chest as the elevator rose slowly toward the exit. Garrus could feel her tension oozing all over the space. Three quarters of the way up, the elevator stopped dead in its tracks and Garrus frowned looking to the Asari. She shrugged and then he heard Shepard's heart rate increase as she drew her shotgun. "Give us the Asari and you can go," a booming voice said from the small alcove that opened up into the chamber that housed the series of catwalks they'd came in to.

Garrus spun to point his weapon at the threat just as the ground rocked again. "You really wanna do this here?" Shepard growled through gritted teeth. "The whole place is falling down around our ears."

"Surrender," the large Krogan said, approaching them with a swarm of geth at his back. "Or don't. It' more fun that way."

Shepard sneered. "Dr. T'Soni, please find cover," she said before unleashing a battle cry he didn't know humans were capable of until it came from Shepard's throat. She rushed the Krogan with her shotgun, unloading five rounds into him before diving behind a small console that barely provided her any cover. The geth began firing at Garrus. "Shit!" he heard her shout. Realizing she had probably over heated the weapon, he fired a few rounds of cover fire while she popped her heat sink and replaced it. Kaidan stepped forward and shot a few geth before Garrus recognized a singularity speeding through the air past him and directly at the Krogan. He looked at Kaidan who shrugged, in no shape himself to be using his biotics. They both spared a glance behind them at the Asari who was now cowering behind a pile of rubble.

The singularity had slowed down the Krogan and temporarily paused his regenerative abilities. Shepard took full advantage of the opportunity by unleashing her shotgun on him again. "Krogan down!" Garrus shouted as he started to focus on the geth who were still shooting at them. His shields were taking some bad hits, getting thinner and thinner. They dispatched the geth as quickly as they could, and he heard Shepard's shields go down. He couldn't spare a glance her way until after the geth were all taken care of. Once all enemy fire had ceased, he turned to assess the others. After Kaidan waved him off, he turned toward Shepard and the scent of blood hit him. "Crap, Shepard. You're hit."

"I'm fine," she said, clutching her left shoulder. "Where's T'Soni?" Just then, the ground shook again. "We need to get out of here." Kaidan was helping the doctor stand and they jogged toward the exit. Shepard spared her right hand from holding her shoulder to push Garrus toward the exit as well. "Go! Vakarian!"

She hurried along behind him, shooing him forward every time he stopped to make sure she was keeping up. The tremors had escalated into a full scale earthquake. Rocks and metal debris fell all around them, slowing their progress as they followed the narrow path back to the surface. He could smell her blood pumping faster from her wound as she ran, her heart rate elevated. "Dammit, Shepard, come on." He grabbed her un-injured arm and pulled her along faster, his superior reflexes helping them dodge faster and reach the light shining from outside. Just as they hurled themselves through the narrow entryway, the whole cave collapsed in on itself, knocking them forward. Garrus twisted his body mid air to catch Shepard who was careening face first toward one of the lava pools that the earthquake was bringing toward the surface.

"Holy, shit!" she breathed as they landed, her on top of him on the ground near where the Normandy was hovering with the hatch open. Kaidan had already had the presence of mind to shove the doctor into the Mako and drive it into the cargo bay. Shepard put her weight on her palms and pushed up off of him, standing after awkwardly tripping over his legs. Once she'd caught her balance, she reached down with her good arm to help him up. "Thanks, Big Guy. Without you, I'm pretty sure I'd be stuck inside an erupting volcano."

"You sure you're alright?" he asked as she swayed on her feet, her eye lids drooping. He stood, refusing her hand up. Before she could answer, her knees gave out and she toppled. Garrus caught her and she went limp in his arms. He swiftly scooped her up and ran to the Normandy, heading directly for the elevator to take her to the med bay as the hatch closed behind him and the ship took off.

He heard Kaidan run up behind him, but barely heard what the human said over the panic in his brain. "What the hell happened?"

"She was shot," he growled, slamming the button again, trying to force the elevator to go faster.

"Why didn't she use medigel?" Kaidan asked, approaching to examine her.

Garrus reacted on instinct, cradling Shepard closer to his chest as Kaidan reached for her. "We didn't have time before the mad dash for freedom," he growled.

Kaidan was cowed by Garrus' reaction and instead of trying to touch Shepard again, he radioed the med bay and told them to be ready. Dr. Chakwas met them at the elevator, directing Garrus to the med bay and asking him questions about Shepard's condition. He answered to the best of his ability as he gently laid her down on the bed the doctor had pointed to. He brushed her hair from her face, remembering she hated that and stepped to the side so the doctor could work. His hand remained touching the top of her head and he watched the doctor remove Shepard's armor from her shoulder and prod at the wound. "No time for medigel," he heard the doctor harrumph to herself as she worked, her eyes quickly rolling up into her skull before she sighed and continued. He wasn't sure exactly what her expressions meant or what emotions she was trying to convey, but she soon looked up from what she was doing to glare at him. He narrowed his eyes to convey that he didn't intend on leaving but she spoke anyway. "Vakarian, I have been a doctor longer than you have existed. I need room to work if you want Shepard to get better. Now please, go help Kaidan tend to our new passenger." The doctor's words somehow got through to him. And he reluctantly removed his hand from her hair and sheepishly left the med bay.

"Is she going to be alright?" he heard the soft voice of the Asari ask. He spared her a glance and saw Kaidan was slowly removing his armor a short distance away near his bunk. The girl was wringing her hands nervously and when he returned her gaze he managed to nod.

"Dr. Chakwas is the best, Dr. T'Soni." He repeated what Kaidan had told him once as they'd talked over a meal, never having seen the doctor in action before.

"Please, my name is Liara," the girl said, her tone never changing. "I'm sorry, I don't think I know your name."

"Garrus," he responded, his fear for Shepard settling into a nice neat feeling of guilt. He was supposed to be watching her six. How could this happen?

When he didn't say anything else, Liara's cheeks flushed a light purple and she excused herself. Kaidan approached him, pulling a t shirt on over his bare chest. "You know, I didn't get into the Mako until I saw you pull Shepard from that cave. Thanks for saving her."

"I didn't save her, Kaidan," Garrus spat. "She could bleed to death."

Kaidan offered him a smile and shook his head. "Shepard is too stubborn to bleed to death." Before Garrus could answer, Kaidan walked away to talk with Liara. He watched him lead her to the kitchenette and she smiled at his offer of food.

* * *

 

Garrus found himself pacing outside the med bay hours later. What was taking so long? He had not even bothered to change out of his armor since they'd returned. Everyone else had retreated to a safe distance as the pacing Turian made them nervous. Finally the med bay doors whooshed open and out stepped Shepard. "Thanks Dr. Chakwas." she waved at the doctor who stood, arms crossed with a disapproving glare on her face. He rushed over to her as the doors closed and she turned to walk away from the med bay. "Oh, hey, Big Guy." Her tone was nonchalant, but Garrus could see the strain on her features. Her skin was paler than usual and she had dark rings under her eyes.

"Shepard." He reached to touch her face, but changed his mind and made it less awkward by attempting to pat her good shoulder. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah sure," she shrugged her one shoulder under his hand, clearly still favoring her injury. Medigel was good, but it would take time for the gunshot wound to fully heal. She was carrying her armor that had been removed from the waist up and he took it from her as she started toward her cabin. "Doc wanted me to stay for observation, but I hate hospitals." They stopped in front of her door and she opened it with a code. Stepping in, she left him feeling awkward as he stood in the doorway. "Come on in. You can drop that stuff over there. She waved her hand toward a small table jutting out from the wall then sat down heavily in a chair beside her desk. Garrus stepped into the room and he noticed her scent was everywhere. She had clothes piled in different areas of the floor and bed and scattered everywhere were bits of tech and data pads that she'd been using.

"Is this how all human Captains live?" he asked, a grin distracting him from his guilt.

"Shut up," she returned his grin as he set her armor pieces on the table. "Not all of us can have that ridiculous Turian discipline."

He stared at her for a moment as the doors closed behind him. "Look, Shepard, I'm sorry."

"What for?" she asked sitting forward, genuine confusion wrinkling her forehead.

"Letting you get shot. I was supposed to have your six. You trusted me and I let you get hurt," he confessed, angry with himself again.

"You've got to be kidding," she chuckled. "You realize that you literally pulled my ass out of the fire today, Garrus?" She sat back in her chair again, crossing her ankles as she lifted them to rest on the edge of her bed.

His protest was cut short by the look on her face. It was a mixture of amusement and another emotion Garrus had yet to see. She wasn't angry with him. The exact opposite. She was grateful. "Well, I suppose I did." He smirked, a weight lifting from his shoulders.

"You did. Now go and change. I want to call a debrief in the comm room and I can't have my number two showing up covered in my blood." She waved a dismissing hand at him.

He looked down at his chest just noticing the red streaks that had caked up on his armor. "Hmm, yeah, sure thing, Shepard." Since when was _he_ her number two?

* * *

 

As soon as Garrus had left and the doors closed behind him, Shepard sighed and leaned back in her chair, the pain of the day washing over her. Her shoulder throbbed and her brain was racing. She closed her eyes for a moment, knowing that she eventually had to face the crew and the debrief. She was not looking forward to it. She wanted to curl up in a ball and sleep forever.

Sighing again and forcing her body into motion, Shepard crossed the room to her dresser. She pulled out a pair of cargos and a t shirt. It would be more formal to address the crew in her uniform, but Shepard was not in the mood for buttons. She cringed as she lifted her arms to remove the shirt she'd had on under her armor that was now no longer worthy of being called a shirt. Dr. Chakwas had cut deep into the shoulder, leaving cloth dangling and bloodied. She balled the mess up and tossed it into the garbage. Removing the rest of her armor, she stepped into the shower to quickly clean herself up.

While she scrubbed the grime from her, she heard a message come in through her console. She reluctantly got out of the steaming shower and dried off to check the terminal. She slipped the comfortable pants on and struggled into the t shirt, every move of her shoulder reminding her of the bullet wound. She noticed that her bandage was visible below the sleeve of the shirt, so she pulled on her favorite black N7 hoodie and zipped it up half way.

The message that was waiting for her was a shock. A few systems away, the Alliance had received a distress call from a group of scientists near Terra Nova. They had been escorting an asteroid from Borr to use as an orbital facility for housing the overflow of colonists from Terra Nova. It was unclear what had happened to the team, but the asteroid was off course and careening toward the planet's surface. It seemed that on its current course and their current location, they were the only ship within range of hoping to arrive in time to stop the destruction.

"Joker!" she opened a comm to the bridge. "Set a course for Terra Nova. I need us there ASAP, follow emergency mission protocols and gather the crew in the comm room."

"Roger, Commander," Joker replied only a slight question in his voice.

Shepard closed the message and made her way to the comm room. The debrief would have to wait. She was the first to arrive and she stood with her back to the door, palms flat on the inactive console composing herself to lead another mission so soon after her injury.

"Everything alright, Shepard?" Kaidan's voice made her jump and spin around to face him.

"Yeah," she said a little too quickly, relieved that he had been the only one there to see her reaction. "We have another mission. Came through emergency channels from Alliance brass."

He stepped a little closer to her, the puppy dog look she was getting used to seeing all over his face. "Shepard, you just got out of the med bay. Are you sure you should be taking this on?"

"We're the only Alliance ship in the vicinity, Kaidan. I don't have a choice. Millions of lives are at stake." She crossed her arms, aware that he was slowly approaching closer. The action was not unwanted, but it was certainly inappropriate when she knew the rest of the crew could show up at any moment. Her heart was racing by the time the doors whooshed open and Garrus stepped in.

Garrus cleared his throat, the familiar flanging of his subvocals pronounced. The sound brought back a memory of after she was injured. She had been swimming on the surface of her consciousness and she remembered being carried. There had been a comforting rumbling sound she'd heard that she wasn't sure was really there. Had it been Garrus? She peered around Kaidan as he gave her a glance that said they would talk later. Yes, they definitely needed to talk about whatever was happening between them. Garrus flashed her a smirk that said he knew what was happening and her cheeks flushed as Kaidan backed off and took a seat on the right side of the room. Garrus sat across from him without a word as Shepard attempted to calm her still racing heart. Her shoulder throbbed and she reached up to gently rub a hand over it.

The rest of the crew filtered in. The last to arrive was Dr. T'Soni. "I'm sorry," she said softly. "I was not certain you wanted me here." She sat on Shepard's left, folding her hands in her lap.

"Okay," Shepard began, pushing away from the console where she'd been leaning. "I know most of you are expecting a debrief on what happened on Therum, but something has come up. Joker is on course to Terra Nova. Alliance brass informed me that there is an asteroid piloted by fusion torches headed straight for the planet's surface and a heavily populated area. It isn't clear what went wrong so we are heading into a blind situation here." She glanced around at the faces of her crew, all with signs of protest plastered on them. Garrus had sat forward, partially turned toward her, one hand on his knee. She held up a hand as she recognized the sound again coming from his throat. The only other person in the room who gave any sign of being able to hear it was Wrex who was watching Garrus intently with his arms crossed over his chest. "Before any of you decide to give me an earful, I didn't choose this assignment. We are the only ship in range that can possibly reach the asteroid in time to divert its course. I'm not going to risk innocent lives because I was shot." She paused, making sure that the dire state of the situation sunk in with everyone. "Now, we only have a few hours before we reach Terra Nova. I'm taking Garrus and Tali down to the surface of the asteroid with me." Kaidan opened his mouth to protest and she stopped him. "Kaidan, you over exerted your amp on Therum and I don't think I'll need a biotic on this mission. Tali, has the technical expertise I need to help me disable the fusion torches and Garrus can watch our backs." After she was certain that there were no more protests she crossed her arms and continued. "One last thing before I dismiss everyone to prepare, I want to introduce Dr. T'Soni to those of you who weren't on the ground team. She'll be staying with us for the foreseeable future until this mess with Saren is taken care of. Her life is in danger and hopefully we can keep the threat minimal if she is aboard the Normandy."

A frustrated "hmph," escaped Ashley before she said. "We already have every other race on board, why not add an Asari to the mix."

Shepard turned her eyes to Ashley as they narrowed. If the gunnery chief was going to insist on being openly racist, Shepard was going to find a way to punish her. Perhaps the private chat they had had a few weeks ago was not enough to show her that Shepard wouldn't stand for her bigotry. "If you don't like how I run my ship, chief, let me know and we will drop you off the next time we're on the Citadel."

The girl's brown eyes widened. "No, Skipper. No complaints. I'm proud to serve under you."

"Good," Shepard nodded, turning her attention back to the rest of the group. "Is there anything else?"

After a pause, the young Asari cleared her throat softly and raised her hand. Shepard smiled, amused by the coyness in her demeanor, and nodded to give her the floor. "You and your crew saved my life and the least I can do is lend some assistance. I am not the best biotic, but I have fought a little bit before. All Asari are trained when they are very young. I also wish to ask you all to call me by my first name, Liara." Her cheeks flushed purple as she spoke, clearly not used to large groups of people.

"Of course, Liara. I'd like to ask how you're settling in. Dr. Chakwas was a bit preoccupied with me when you came aboard, but she is the best in her field and knows a lot about many different species. If you need any medical assistance, feel free to introduce yourself. Also, I'm sure you're tired from your ordeal. I will have someone make you up a bunk if you'd like while you grab something from the mess." Shepard offered.

"No that's okay," Liara flushed again. "The Lieutenant was kind enough to show me around while you were indisposed. The ship is magnificent and everyone was very accommodating."

Shepard graced Kaidan with a smile which he returned, practically beaming at her. "I appreciate that Kaidan, thank you." She then returned her attention to Liara. "If you need anything, feel free to come and ask. My quarters are right next to the mess."

"Thank you, Commander." Liara smiled gently.

"Now, if there is nothing else, you're all dismissed. Ground team, I need you ready by the Mako in 3 hours." Shepard watched them all go, waiting to leave herself to get ready. Everyone cleared out but Garrus who hovered by the doorway. "What's up, Big Guy?" she asked once everyone else was gone.

"Shepard, you are not in any shape to be leading a ground mission," he informed her, a concerned rumble in his chest.

"Hell, I know that Garrus. That's why I'm bringing you along." She could not explain her deep trust in the Turian. She'd only known him for a few weeks, but she felt like his hands were the only ones she could place her life in and feel completely safe. Kaidan was sweet, but he was rash. He made decisions based on his feelings and not facts. She knew for a fact that it chafed him, but Garrus thought everything through before he acted. She needed that kind of calculus at her back, watching her six.

"Well, as long as you know," he sighed, accepting her decision "Don't worry, Shepard. I've got your six."

"Good," she replied. "Now go get ready. I need the Mako at least drive-able in three hours."

"I'll do my best, but I'm no miracle worker, Shepard. You rode her hard down there."

"Hard and fast, what other way is there?" She winked at him as he turned to leave, laughing at her innuendo.

* * *

 

Shepard had managed to find a spare set of her armor amongst her things. As she rode the elevator down to the cargo bay, she gingerly rolled her shoulder, trying to get comfortable as the shoulder pad dug into her bullet wound. The elevator let her off and she put on her Commander face so no one would see just how much pain she was actually in.

She made her way over to Garrus who had his head deep in the Mako's engine while Tali talked a mile a minute behind him, obviously excited to be chosen for the ground team. She handed him the wrench in her hands when he beckoned for it, not even slowing her speech once. "Shepard!" she said as the commander crossed the cargo bay. "Garrus almost has the Mako in working condition. I lent him a hand since I don't need to take the time to strap on armor."

"She was a big help," Garrus said pulling his head out of the engine and forcing Shepard to choke down her chuckle at the sarcastic expression he wore. Garrus had made the Mako his personal hobby and apparently Tali 'helping' was more like Tali getting under his skin. "She tried to enter some Quarian code into my calibrations, which were already perfect."

"Oh, Tali! Don't you know not to touch Garrus' calibrations?" Shepard put her hand up to her mouth as if she were going to whisper a secret to Tali. "It's a sensitive subject." she hissed loudly.

Garrus tossed his oily rag at her at the insult. "See if I adjust your steering manifold back to human height," he threatened.

"I'll make do," she shrugged and then cringed as her wound sent a jolt of pain down her arm. She saw Garrus' eyes narrow, but he didn't say a word, much to her relief.

"The old girl's as ready as she'll get," he said just as Joker's voice came over the intercom announcing that they were nearing the asteroid.

Shepard, Tali and Garrus piled into the Mako and strapped in for the drop. Shepard was not looking forward to this drop like she had the last one. She frowned at the thought of hitting the ground in the vehicle while she started it up and checked all her settings. "Alright, helmets on. I'm launching in 30."

* * *

 

The Mako slammed into the ground of the asteroid and Garrus heard Shepard's pained inhale of breath. "That was fun!" Tali said, none the wiser to Shepard's pain.

After a moment, Shepard pushed the Mako into gear, heading for the first torch. It was clearly visible from the landing zone that the torch was set to maximum. "Okay, people. There are three working torches around the area. We need to stop _all_ of them in less than 4 hours if we want to keep this asteroid from hitting Terra Nova. _Should_ be an easy job, but we don't know what is going on down here. We may..." Shepard was cut off by a hissing in their comms.

"Hello?" a female voice came over the speakers in Garrus' helmet. "I don't know who you are, but we need help. The asteroid has been taken over by terrorists. They pointed the torches specifically for maximum loss of life. You need to shut them down."

Shepard tried to reply a few times before the voice answered her. "Who are the terrorists? What do they want?"

"They're Batarian. Aside from destruction, I have no idea what they want." Garrus saw Shepard's hands tighten on the wheel when the voice said Batarian. Did Shepard have a history with Batarians? He knew she was a veteran of the Skyllian Blitz, but her reaction felt more personal. Her heart rate had skyrocketed and she grunted softly. "You need to get those torches down."

"We will do our best," she replied and pushed her foot down harder on the gas.

After they got inside the control center for the first torch by blowing up a few defense turrets placed around the area, Shepard removed her helmet and clipped it to her belt. The entry room was empty, but the door leading further into the facility was locked. Shepard allowed Tali to hack the lock while she pulled her pistol and readied her stance. Garrus followed her lead, preparing his assault rifle in case someone was waiting on the other side of the door.

Of course, someone _was_ waiting. A group of Batarians with trained attack varrens to be specific. Upon spotting the Batarians, Shepard's heart again took off with more adrenaline than she'd had when fighting the geth on Therum or Fist's thugs on the Citadel. He was becoming concerned with whatever ghosts Shepard was hiding behind her eyes. She was working mechanically on the outside, but she was obviously struggling with more than just her physical wound. He noticed her complete lack of banter like they'd shared during their other fights. Not wanting to distract her or break whatever fragile wall she'd placed over her emotions to take cover behind, he continued to watch her six.

When the threat was neutralized, they found the console in an office that controlled the massive torch. Garrus kept an eye out while Shepard and Tali pressed their heads together to get the torch offline. After only moments, the sound of machinery shutting down struck him and the ground shook slightly as the torch turned off. They headed back the way they had come to go out to the Mako and drive to the next closest torch. As they passed through the previously locked door, He heard a gunshot and the buzz of Shepard's shields as they absorbed the impact. Immediately, her gun was raised and pointed at the threat.

"Oh, Shit! I thought you were Batarians," a male's voice said as Garrus rounded the corner, his rifle pointed in the direction he saw Shepard aiming. The speaker was a middle aged human male that had dropped his gun and had his hands in the air.

"You should really be more careful," Shepard snapped, sighing and clipping her pistol back in its holster. "Who are you?"

The man only relaxed slightly as he noticed Garrus' gun still trained on him. He proceeded to tell them he ran the facility and he was out looking for the other scientists that were stationed at remote outposts along the surface. Shepard promised him she'd keep an eye out, but time was of the essence. He also sheepishly brought up the fact that he had laid mines outside one of the torch facilities and they would have to go in on foot carefully because the Mako would definitely set them off. Agitation in Shepard's stance indicated that she was more than a little angry about that particular news. She grabbed her helmet and told the man to stay put and she would handle things, then they were off.

Back in the Mako, Shepard drove with more care than he'd seen to date. She stayed in the middle of the path, her eyes glued to the road and her fists wrapped tightly around the steering wheel. Shortly, they came upon what Garrus assumed was one of the remote outposts. With no signs of life, they downloaded the log and continued on. This happened once more on their way to the second torch. When they approached the area and Garrus caught a visual, the Mako's alarms began to screech. "Those must be the landmines," Shepard grumbled, circling the area and mapping the danger zone. "More turrets too."

"On them," Garrus said, sliding to the gun controls and picking off the turrets as she drove. She stopped the Mako as close as she could get without triggering the mines and scanned the ground as she walked carefully toward the entrance.

About halfway through the mine field, Garrus caught movement coming from the facility. "Shepard, two o'clock," he raised his rifle.

"Lead them into the field," she said over her shoulder to Tali, pointing her pistol.

The Quarian immediately pulled up her omnitool and spawned a defense drone that flew toward the three Batarians. They stupidly chased the drone closer to the mine field. As soon as they were in range, Shepard fired her pistol, hitting one of the mines in the dirt near their feet. The mine exploded, two of the Batarians getting launched into the air as the third watched. One of the bodies landed on another mine, taking out the bystander in the explosion. "Clever Shepard," Tali said, Garrus picturing the mischievous grin on her face under her helmet. The drone fizzled into nothingness as they approached the facility, still very slowly.

Shepard reached the console first. "That must be the controls to the mine field," Tali said, approaching behind her. Garrus came up last, watching for anyone coming from the back of the compound.

"Let's make the return trip easier," Shepard said using the free hand not holding her pistol to disengage the mine triggers.

The inside of the facility was very similar to the last. They went in, killed the enemies and shut down the torch. When the shut down finalized, their comms hissed again. "The Batarians know you're here. Their leader wants you dead, badly. We're holed up in the main facility, but I hear them skulking around."

Shepard clenched her fists and Garrus could see her jaw set in anger like she was grinding her teeth. Her posture was rigid. They hit the last torch facility, finding the bodies of the remaining scientists scattered around the terrain outside their outposts along the way. The bodies showed significant trauma that Garrus wanted to hope was post mortem, but he knew otherwise. "Torture," he growled. "Despicable."

Shepard became uncomfortably silent by the time they reached the third torch facility. It was like she had taken all of her personality, balled it up and stuffed it deep down in a box. After the sound of the torch stopped, Shepard turned around and stalked off toward the exit. "Time to find the main facility."

They were met on the bottom floor of the facility by a group of Batarians with their hands up in the air in a show of truce. Shepard drew her pistol and trained it on the one closest to them. "Wait! I never wanted to be a part of this!" he said. "My name is Charn. I'm not a terrorist. Balak is in charge. He's nuts. What Balak wants, Balak gets."

"So why are you here then?" she asked, never taking her pistol from where it was aimed. "I'd be real careful what you say if I were you."

"Look, Balak said we were coming to pick up a shipment. When we got here, he started raving about humans and how they needed to pay. A lot of the men stood beside him, but I'm here to help you." The Batarian said.

"What makes you think I want help from a slave trader?" Shepard asked.

"Hey, I don't have to help you. I could go back to Balak and warn him you're not dead. He sent me to kill you when he figured out what you were doing. He's got hostages at the main facility. Already killed one of the security."

Shepard stared down the Batarian, her two eyes boring into his four. Garrus felt the tension in the air as she fought her instincts. "Get the hell out of here," she growled, lowering her weapon. "If I so much as hear your name attached to anything related to slavery, I _will_ find you."

"Good luck, human," Charn said as he led his men out of the facility.

Shepard stood in place for several minutes, breathing heavily, her fists clenched. Garrus was just about to speak up when she whispered softly, "I fucking hate slavers."

Her fists unclenched and she started walking without even acknowledging that he and Tali were still behind her. They climbed into the Mako and Shepard followed the radar to the nav point that the logs from the outposts had pointed to. It was a silent ride full of tension that made Garrus start to hum with sympathetic anger. Tali stared out the window her head leaning on her knuckles, all of her spunk from earlier drained. Garrus saw Shepard turn her head to frown at him but couldn't tell why. Nothing he was doing should have been audible or understood by human ears. The glance was quick and he decided to write it off as him possibly nudging her seat when he shifted his weight.

The main facility was underground, accessible by a hatch guarded by even more defense turrets. It was routine by that point. Shepard driving evasively while Garrus unloaded the heavy ammo into them. Inside the facility, there were so many active attack drones that Garrus was certain there was no place to take cover without someone having a clear shot. After fighting a tiresome battle with the flying nuisances, they were forced back by a group of Batarians that they dispatched as well. "Show yourself, Balak!" Shepard shouted as she approached a large empty shipping container. "Come on out!" She banged the butt of her gun on the metal surface.

"You humans." A scratchy voice came from the stairway above. Garrus spun and trained his gun on the speaker. He stood with another Batarian and one of the trained Varren they'd been dealing with. Shepard turned her gun on him as well, backing up to get a good sight-line. "You're almost more trouble than you're worth."

"I'm just getting started," Shepard growled through gritted teeth.

"Predictable, but this is over. I'm leaving this asteroid. If you try to stop me, I'll detonate these charges and your helper and her friends are going to die." Balak said calmly pointing out some bombs that had probably come out of the shipping container.

"I can't just let you go, Balak. Not after what happened here," Garrus watched Shepard's finger shaking over the trigger of her pistol. He had no doubt that the shot, if she took it, would be the last thing Balak saw between his four eyes.

"This is nothing," Balak scoffed. "You humans have done far worse to the Batarians. We've been forced into exile, forced to survive on what we can scrounge up. It's been like that for decades."

"Don't make it sound like you're the innocent party here. You brought it upon yourselves," Shepard's heart rate was surprisingly steady after the emotional torrent it was going through before.

"Really? You invaded our space, took our resources, and when we asked the council for aid, they brushed us off. We were left to defend ourselves, but the humans were stronger than us. We knew that, the council knew that, but it didn't matter. It was you! You and your kind are the only reason we're in this position!" Balak was becoming heated, his calm demeanor eroding away into anger at Shepard and her taunting.

"How does killing innocent people make up for that?" She bullied on, not wasting a breath after he finished speaking.

"We had no other options. Sometimes you need to get someone's attention before they'll listen. That's why we attacked you at Elysium. That's why I'm doing this. You forced our hand!"

"You attacked us first. When we retaliated, you ran off to the Council for help. When you didn't get it, you hid. You've got no one to blame but yourselves."

"Enough!" Balak shouted pacing in a small circle. Shepard's eyes and pistol followed him without fail. "You couldn't possibly understand. Actually, you just don't want to understand, and I'm done wasting my breath. Now, if you want your friends to live, I suggest you step aside."

Shepard suddenly smelled like fear. The scent did not mix well with her body chemistry, like it was something new that didn't belong. Garrus watched her aim waver as she fought some inner battle. After what felt like ages, she reigned in the fear swirling around her and took a deep breath, pointing her pistol to the sky in an act of acceptance. "You can go, but this isn't over. I'll find you eventually."

Balak grinned at his victory. "Maybe, but I made sure you won't follow me today. Those charges are still on a timer. Better hurry if you want to save your friends." He turned his back and strolled off. Before they could even catch their breath and look at the bombs to see how long they had to disable them, a slew of the deadly drones swooped in on them.

"Keelah!" Tali breathed. "How many of those things do they have?"

"Tali," Shepard caught her attention. "One of those bombs is right behind us. Get on it and see what you can do. Me and Garrus will cover your back."

Garrus concentrated more on guarding Shepard as she unloaded on the drones than Tali who was safely crouched behind the bomb as she worked to disable it. They worked swiftly to get the bombs all disabled within the ten minute time limit that Balak had slapped on them. Shepard worked out her rage on the drones, overloading them and shooting them down with scary precision. After all was taken care of, They found the room that the hostages had been locked in and let them out. Garrus recognized the voice of the woman who had helped them when Shepard introduced herself and told the woman what had happened. "You let him go to save us? Is that okay?" she asked.

Shepard gave her a forced smile. "He can't run from the Alliance forever."

They had one last conversation with the older man they had encountered earlier who was so grateful that he gave Shepard an experimental Quarian Exo Suit that he guaranteed was better than the one Tali was wearing. Tali tilted her head with skepticism but accepted the suit. Garrus had a feeling she was going to be doing a lot of testing and tinkering when they got back to the Normandy.

All of the wind had been knocked out of Shepard's sails as humans were prone to saying when someone looked particularly emotionally exhausted. She dragged her feet and had yet to clip her pistol back in its holster as they walked back to the Mako for extraction. Garrus knew better than to say anything in front of Tali, but he was determined to get the whole story from Shepard eventually. Something about this mission had really pressed her buttons.

* * *

 

Shepard felt numb. The mission on asteroid X57 had been a success for the most part. They had stopped the fusion torches and saved the innocents, but the fact that Balak had gotten away was really grating on her conscience. It might have been better if she could have sulked in peace, but she could tell that Garrus was reading her like a damn book. She'd never trusted anyone enough to open up about what had happened to her colony, to her family. Perhaps it was time to share her burden.

As the Normandy took off from the surface of the asteroid, she climbed out of the Mako and headed straight for the elevator. She wanted to talk with Garrus, but she really wasn't fully ready. Just as she was reaching to push the button to close the doors, he slipped into the car with her. She glared at him and sighed before admitting defeat and closing the door with him standing casually beside her.

The elevator started to climb and she crossed her arms in front of her chest and waited for him to speak. "So, Shepard. Things got a bit tense down there. Care to share with your best Turian?"

She sighed again and stayed silent until the elevator came to a stop. When she stepped out, he looked like he would respect her decision if she didn't answer his question, but she cocked her head toward her cabin. "You coming, Big Guy?" He remained stoic as he followed her through the mess. She input her door code and stepped into her cabin, Garrus this time not hesitating as he had before, followed her in. The doors whooshed shut behind them and she turned to look at his expectant expression. Before talking, she wanted to get out of the sweaty armor, so she reached for her shoulder clips, forgetting about her healing gunshot wound. "Ah, shit!" she cried out as the movement dug the armor into the tender spot. Garrus rolled his eyes in a very human gesture and stepped closer to shoo her hands away. He slowly worked the snaps to her armor, careful not to aggravate her wound. She watched him work for a moment before beginning to speak. "I was sixteen," she began, Garrus pausing to look into her eyes and encouraging her to continue. He went back to his task and she continued. "I told you I grew up on a farm, well we were a small colony stationed on Mindoir. I was out one morning, earlier than I should have been, messing around with Nathan Bellinski in the old barn. We spent the day together and had no clue what was happening back at the main section of the colony. After I left to get home in time for dinner, I was on cloud nine. He was my first real boyfriend. I was so excited." She paused to take a ragged breath. Garrus said nothing as he moved to her other side to work the clasps for her other arm pad. "When I got to the house, I really hadn't noticed anything amiss until I got to the kitchen. It was horrible. There they were, my parents, executed over their breakfast. They'd been dead all day and I'd been off fucking around. Before I could even mourn, I heard voices from the other room. They must have heard me coming in because I was not exactly being quiet. I rushed for the counter and my mother's knife block. She was always such a good cook. I grabbed the biggest freaking knife I could find and I ran. I stepped in my parents blood as I crossed the kitchen, leaving a nice trail behind me for the slavers to follow. I tried to make it back to the barn and Nathan, but I was cut off by more slavers. I panicked and switched direction to try and make it to the school house. Before I could get there, I was grabbed from behind. Luckily I've always had good reflexes because I almost stabbed Nathan. He took my hand and we ran together. At the side entrance to the school, there was a small alley that lead to a dead end behind the building where some of the high schoolers used to hide to smoke during lunch. When Nathan opened the door to go inside, there was one of the slavers waiting for us. He stepped in front of me to protect me as the slaver backed us into the blind corner. The slaver didn't care, he reached out and snapped Nathan's neck right in front of me. He was dead before he hit the ground. When he came for me, I lashed out with the knife." Shepard paused again, rubbing her right palm over the old scar as she remembered in vivid detail. Garrus was now working on her chest piece. She heard a humming in his chest as he worked. "I guess I pushed too far and cut my own hand in the process of driving the kitchen knife home. His was the first life I ever took." The chest piece fell off her into his hands and he set it gently down by the table with her damaged set. While she fought her emotions, he gently led her to her desk chair and sat her down. He took her leg and started on the clasps kneeling in front of her as she pushed onward. "Three days I avoided them, Garrus, not always successfully. Most of them I surprised, but one of them caught me while he was alone and, well let's just say it was unpleasant when he got the knife away from me." His hands dropped temporarily from the clasps as he worked out what she meant, his mandibles shuddering. Then with a growl, he resumed his work. "After I found another way to dispose of that one while he was...vulnerable, pants around his ankles, I ran. I finally made it back to the barn and hid for hours on the last day before the raid sirens sounded. That's how the Alliance patrol found me. Bloodied and feverish from infection, cowering in that barn." Her fist closed around the scar and she was surprised to find tears in her eyes. "I don't ever want to be that scared again."

He had stopped what he was doing when he noticed she was crying. "Oh, Shepard," he said standing and pulling her up to hug her. More surprising than the hug was the soothing purr that was resounding in his throat. He stroked her hair gently and she sobbed into his neck, her arms folded up against his chest. "I had no idea. I'm so sorry."

They stood there a long time as she released the frustration and baggage that had been dragged up by Balak and his scheme. "I've never told that story to anyone," she confessed finally trusting her voice not to come out in a sob.

"I hate to say I'm honored," he said gripping her upper arms gently and pulling away to look her in the eyes. He did not attempt to brush away her tears, but he did flatten out her hair and push it behind her ears with a supportive smile.

She returned the smile, grateful to have everything off her chest. It felt right that Garrus knew her deep dark secret and didn't think less of her for it. She could tell by his body language. He still respected her. She wasn't sure if anyone else would be able to hear she'd been so emotionally scarred and still be able to see her as stable. She'd worked hard to get where she was in her life, trying to leave her past where it laid. "Thank you," she said, wiping away her own tears. "For listening."

"I told you, Shepard. I'm here if you need me." She flopped back down in the chair and rubbed her face and pushed her own hair back. She was suddenly drained. She reached down and finished what Garrus had started with her boots. By the time she was stripped of her armor, Garrus had switched to a concerned expression. "You look exhausted."

"Yeah," she agreed with a small smile and a chuckle. "Two missions back to back without so much as a nap in between. Plus I've been shot _and_ cried my eyes out on the shoulder of a Turian. It's been a really long day."

"Get some sleep, Shepard. I think the debrief can wait. Plus, you may not want to face everyone else in your current state. You're all red and puffy." She heard the humor in his voice and gave another short laugh.

"You're such an ass Vakarian, but I think I might take your advice. Would you mind letting everyone know I'll debrief them in the morning?" She stood and took the few steps to her bed to crawl between the sheets. The bed was soft under her skin and she hated that she didn't even shower before she had soiled her sheets with her combat sweat.

The door opened with a hiss and Garrus looked over his shoulder "You like this ass," he said making her chuckle and him frown as the innuendo went over his head. He shrugged and nearly collided with Kaidan who was standing there with his fist in the air like he was prepared to knock. "Oh, hi Kaidan."

"Is Shepard alright?" she heard Kaidan's voice but couldn't see him as Garrus blocked her view. His tone was accusatory as she realized what this must look like.

She pulled the sheets up over her head and groaned as Garrus stepped out of the threshold and said to Kaidan, "She's worn out and needs to sleep. I'm supposed to tell everyone they'll get a debrief in the morning."

She couldn't hear Kaidan's response as the doors closed behind Garrus, sealing off the outside world. It was only moments before she had fallen asleep.

 


	5. Mother May I?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard heads to Noveria to investigate the geth presence.

Another couple of weeks passed as they flew toward one of the planets that Anderson had told her had reported geth sightings. It was called Noveria, a freezing hellscape of a planet that housed some of the galaxy's leading research facilities.

Shepard had been taking her physical training very seriously after being shot, attempting to force the wound to heal more quickly and the muscles not to stiffen up. A lot of her time was spent in the workout corner of the cargo bay where one of the crew was always willing to give her a spot on the punching bag. Usually it was Garrus because it was so close to the Mako and his favorite hang out spot. She noticed that Kaidan had begun coming down to watch after he realized that hanging out near her cabin was no longer getting him much personal face time with her. She allowed him to watch, even putting some effort in to dress a little more showy than her usual sweats and a t shirt. She was in nothing but a sports bra and yoga pants most days as she punched the bag with vigor.

"Is that all you've got, Shepard?" Garrus asked her one day as she was flagging because before the bag she'd decided to do a few much needed push ups.

She grinned around the bag and said, "Maybe one day after I'm fully healed, I'll show you what I've got, Big Guy."

"Don't worry, I'll take you down gently. You know, make it look good, like you might be able to beat me and then, bam, pinned," he teased as she unloaded a few more punches into the bag.

"I'd pay to see Shepard kick your ass!" Wrex hollered from his spot against the wall.

"Yeah, I think I might like to see that too," Ashley remarked.

Shepard had noticed Ashley slowly beginning to integrate herself into the team. She was even on speaking terms with more than one of the aliens on the ship. It was a good feeling to know that she had been part of the bridges being built between species. No one on the Normandy seemed to just see aliens anymore. They all saw crew mates and some even saw friends. "Wrex, maybe I'll take a few pointers on head butting from you before I take this guy on."

"Oh, well now, that's just cheating," Garrus said letting go of the bag and allowing her to over swing and throwing her off balance.

She chuckled, catching herself. "Yeah well, I need some kind of advantage. Your skin is made of metal."

"Infused with," he corrected. "Big difference. It's not like bullets ping off of us or anything."

"You wanna know the secret to a good headbutt?" Wrex grumbled, approaching them. "Head plates."

"Oh, yeah?" Shepard taunted. "Show me."

Wrex grinned wider than Shepard had ever seen him do. "Well, first of all you're standing all wrong."

"Uh, Shepard, is this really a good idea?" Kaidan asked approaching from over by the elevator.

She waved him off, loosening the wrappings on her knuckles. "Saren apparently has Krogan on his payroll. This might be a useful talent."

Wrex kicked her feet apart, positioning her dominant leg behind her and her other slightly in front with her knees bent. When he looked satisfied he said, "Now you'll need a strong wind up. You're a squishy human, so if you're going to headbutt, you need to make the first one count or you might as well be swatting a fly, Shepard."

A grin spread across her face as he partially turned away from her. She leaned back into her back leg as far as she could, stiffened her neck and launched herself forward, smacking Wrex directly in his chin with her forehead. She grunted with the effort and was pleased to see him stumble for a step. A resounding "oooh" spread across the cargo bay.

Wrex turned to look at her as she grinned a bit dazedly and once the shock wore off, he approached her, slapping her on the back and knocking her a step forward. "You're alright, Shepard." he said with a booming laugh.

* * *

 

Landing on Noveria was a bureaucratic nightmare swirling in a blizzard. They were waved off from docking until Joker played the 'SPECTRE on board' card as Shepard leaned on the back of his chair in full armor, ready to provide her credentials. After a few moments, they were allowed a space, but her and the ground team were assaulted by security as soon as they stepped foot out of the airlock. She had to verify her status while they were asked to relinquish their weapons at gun point. A tense few moments passed before a frantic voice came over the loudspeakers allowing them to pass and keep their weapons since they were on council business. The blonde woman who had been eager to shoot them sneered and shoved her gun away as they passed into the main facility. Inside and up the stairs, they started past a welcome desk and screaming alarms sounded. "Oh for pity's sake," Shepard groaned as a woman in a skin tight, pink, floor length dress came from around the desk.

The woman politely introduced herself as Gianna Parasini. "Welcome to Port Hanshan, Commander Shepard. I am secretary to Administrator Anoleis who runs this facility. Sorry about the alarms. Weapons detectors."

Shepard narrowed her eyes, but saw the usefulness to this girl. "Tell me Miss Parasini, has anyone unusual passed through here recently? We've had reports of geth."

"Geth?" The woman looked both curious and frightened. "No, nothing like that, but we did have an Asari Matriarch pass through here a few days ago on her way to the Peak 15 facility."

"Benezia is here?" Kaidan asked softly.

Shepard's heart raced. This was definitely where they needed to be. "You said Peak 15? How do I get there? I have business with the Matriarch."

"I'm afraid you need a special garage pass to leave Port Hanshan. Peak 15 is a secured facility and not to mention there is a blizzard blocking the path up the mountain." Parasini stated.

"Let me rephrase," Shepard crossed her arms at the woman trying to block her from doing her job. "Who do I need to talk to to get permission to visit Peak 15?"

"Well, Commander Shepard, that would be Administrator Anoleis," Parasini crossed her own arms and Shepard heard Kaidan clear his throat uncomfortably. "His office is on the main floor. Take a left off the elevator, go down the steps and another left."

"Thank you," Shepard said with feigned politeness and a rigid smile.

Parasini turned and left and Shepard faced her ground team. "Hey, Shepard, if Liara's mother really is here, maybe we should take her with us," Kaidan suggested.

Shepard nodded. "I was actually thinking the same thing. Maybe she could reason with the Matriarch. Kaidan, you go back to the Normandy and ask Liara to meet us inside."

Kaidan's mouth opened and closed a few times as he looked from Shepard to Garrus, but he never protested. With a sigh, he jogged back toward the Normandy. "You're teasing him bad, Shepard," Garrus quipped as he fell in beside her when she moved toward the elevator.

"It just makes sense," she sighed, smacking the button a little harder than necessary making the security cam in the corner swivel to face her. She swore if it could have squinted in annoyance, it would have. "Trade one biotic for another."

"Oh, I get it, Shepard, but I'm not sure Kaidan does. You might want to address this situation before things get complicated." Garrus offered up his very Turian opinion.

"There are rules against fraternization in the Alliance. It makes it so much worse that I am his CO," she grumbled as they stepped into the elevator.

"You may be Alliance, Shepard, but remember, you are also a SPECTRE. That kind of gives you a free pass," he shrugged, fiddling with one of the clasps on his gauntlets.

"Tell that to the brass," she said, amazed by how quickly the elevator had gotten them where they needed to be.

"At least _talk_ to the man before he has an aneurysm," Garrus suggested following her as she followed the directions to Anoleis' office.

* * *

 

The Salarian administrator was rude. He forbade them access and then proceeded to accuse them of wasting his time. Shepard's mood was getting worse as she and Garrus exited his office. Liara had been waiting for them beside Parasini's desk, clad in a borrowed set of human armor with a pistol at her side that Shepard wasn't certain the Asari knew how to use. The black of the armor did cast an air of attractiveness to her blue skin that Shepard took a moment to appreciate. As she was about to leave Parasini whispered to them of an option to override Anoleis' ruling. The idea was cryptic at best, but Shepard needed to get to that facility.

It turned out that one of the Turians in charge of another project had blackmail on the administrator that he would trade his garage pass to get back from his office which was currently being turned upside down by some of Anoleis' lackeys. Shepard and her team easily took back the data, only attacking those who got in their way. Liara was hesitant with her weapon, but her biotics were very useful.

They were stopped by Parasini on their way back to the hotel bar where the Turian was waiting for his data. She reintroduced herself as internal affairs and asked them to get the Turian to testify against Anoleis in exchange for their very own garage pass. Shepard took the opportunity to pull out her charm and persuade the Turian just to see Anoleis and his attitude taken down a few notches.

Parasini came through after arresting Anoleis, providing Shepard with a pass and even saying she owed her a beer. That was how they found themselves in the middle of the garage surrounded by geth that had appeared out of nowhere. "Dammit," Shepard cursed as she threw herself behind a row of empty crates.

"Well, I guess the geth sightings are confirmed," Garrus said over her comm as he took cover across the garage. Liara tumbled down next to Shepard and began to glow bluer as her biotics flared.

"Yeah," Shepard agreed. "Now we also know what Benezia was transporting in those crates Parasini mentioned."

Liara grunted beside her as she threw a singularity out toward a group of geth that were heading closer. Shepard noticed three hoppers moving quickly around the room and letting loose the lasers that seemed to be their favorite brand of death. Garrus sniped the two troopers that Liara had caught in her singuarity and Shepard heard him reloading. "This is still so strange," the Asari whispered. "I don't understand what my mother could be doing. We haven't been on speaking terms, but she isn't an evil person, Shepard."

Shepard glanced sympathetically at Liara's bright blue eyes. For being 106, Liara was still so young. For Asari, who lived usually 1000 years, Liara was barely an adult and her attitude reflected that. "Maybe we'll get you some answers here, but for now, could you get a hold of those hoppers?" Shepard placed a reassuring hand on Liara's shoulder and was rewarded with a pretty smile.

"Of course."

They took down the geth one by one and when Shepard was convinced they were all gone, she stepped out of cover and had a short conversation with the head of security about locking down the premises. Then they were off. The three of them piled into the Mako and the garage doors opened to reveal a low visibility blizzard ahead.

* * *

 

"Spirits, Shepard, would you be careful. The road is narrow and slippery. Plus I can barely see, so I know you can't see a damn thing." Garrus grumbled as Shepard veered a little too close to the edge of the ledge she was generously calling a path up the mountain. He was in a grumpy mood because of the cold. Biologically, Turians were built to quickly push heat from their bodies because of the extreme temperatures and solar radiation levels on their home world, Palaven. He was not equipped to deal with the cold.

"You worry too much, Big Guy," Shepard retorted, swerving back toward the side of the mountain. "It's just a blizzard. The Mako is specced for icy terrain."

"Yes, well if you go too far over the edge, that might I point out does _not_ have a guardrail, gravity doesn't care what your tank is specced for." He gripped the head of Liara's seat, never worrying as much before about Shepard's driving.

"Don't be such a grumpy gills," Shepard said.

"I have no idea what that means, Shepard, but I don't have gills," his mandibles flicked in annoyance. He needed to get out of the cold and he wished the path to Peak 15 wasn't so long and winding.

Shepard just smirked and continued to drive, apparently realizing he was in no mood for banter. More than a few times on their way up, they ran into pockets of geth activity which for the most part Shepard ignored, running over the ones she could reach and demeaning the stragglers as they fired their small hand guns at the reinforced shields of the tank. "Aww, they're so cute when they're useless," Shepard quipped, swerving to hit another trooper. Soon, the geth became wise to her strategy and as they approached a tunnel, Shepard had to slow to avoid smashing into the row of electronic barriers the geth had erected. "Damn hive mind," she growled, opening her window and letting in a rush of freezing air. She stuck her arm out the window and overloaded a few of the barriers, making room for the Mako to pass through.

They continued on the path until they reached a garage blocked by crates stacked in rows in front of it. To the left of the garage door was an entry way. "I suppose we need to get out now," Liara mused.

Shepard parked the Mako and cut the engine. Garrus' teeth were chattering as he gathered himself to face the outside, even if it was only a few feet. The wind whipped through his armor to his core and he rushed after Shepard to make it inside. The inside was barely warmer and with shaking hands, he readied his rifle in case there was trouble.

* * *

 

Shepard was less than thrilled with the emptiness of the facility as they walked in. She drew her gun and headed forward toward a metal stairway. Suddenly, they were under attack from a couple of Krogan and three or four geth. Shepard cursed herself for letting them get the drop on her. They took them out easily enough, Liara's biotics a real help. She may have been inexperienced, but she was powerful. "I guess we're in the right place."

Garrus nodded his agreement. His mandibles were twitching as he searched every corner with his eyes and probably scanning them with his visor. "Something smells off, Shepard. Be careful."

They continued up the stairs on high alert. As they passed into a hallway, Liara gasped. "Why are the turrets facing the wrong direction?"

"Looks like they are more worried about keeping something in than keeping us out," Shepard commented, passing the defense turrets with caution. She knew what Garrus meant. She didn't have his sense of smell, but her gut was saying something was very wrong here. They made their way along and up an elevator. It deposited them in front of a series of airlocks in a tunnel that opened out into a large room. The room was freezing and snow was piling up around their feet. One of the large windows had been completely shattered, letting in the elements.

She heard Garrus' armor shifting as he shuddered. "Have I ever told you Turians _hate_ the cold?"

She didn't have time to respond before they were descended upon by more geth. After the last one fell, Shepard stayed on alert when she heard a high pitched screech sound. Everyone else heard it too, forming a circle, their backs facing each other and aiming weapons everywhere. "What the hell was that?"

"Pipes?" Liara said optimistically.

"No," Garrus disagreed. "That sounded organic."

"Lovely," Shepard sighed as they waited. Suddenly she saw movement to her right up the stairs. "On my 2!" she shouted, focusing on whatever the hell she was looking at. It was like nothing she'd ever seen before. It's body was insect like, sporting a brown exoskeleton, several legs and long whip like tentacles with sharp pods on the tips. She would have called it a roach if it hadn't been at least five feet tall. Focusing on the giant bug, she almost missed the smaller green ones accompanying it until they were almost on top of them. She started shooting at the tiny crawling things as her skin crawled. "Ugh, I hate bugs." As she fired, she began to notice that the smaller ones were exploding even when she hadn't hit them. A thick green cloud was beginning to fill the air around them. Shepard coughed as the air reached her lungs. "Poison!" she shouted. "Back away!"

She shot as many of the tiny things before they could suicide bomb her squad as she could, Garrus and Liara doing their part as well. Her lungs were burning and her eyes watering. As soon as the little things were gone, she grabbed for her helmet and shoved it down over her head activating the toxin scrubber in her suit. She heard the others doing the same as the larger creature bore down on them. "Crap," she heard Garrus grumble as he raised his weapon again.

Liara had somehow managed to get behind Shepard and what she did next Shepard was certain was going to scar her for life. Liara reached around Shepard with her biotics and pulled the giant bug straight toward her. Shepard let out and embarrassingly girly yelp as the helpless creature flew toward her face. She could feel its tentacles touching her as it floated in mid air. Garrus' laugh over the comms in her helmet as she cowered made her feel silly. "I'm so sorry, Shepard," Liara panicked as Shepard flailed her arms trying to get away from the tentacles.

Finally, someone shot the bug and it dropped to the floor, its weightless state revoked as Liara reigned in her biotics. Shepard scurried out of its space and Garrus doubled over in fits of laughter. "The great Commander Shepard, afraid of bugs," he howled, unable to control his laughter.

Shepard shuddered and pushed her wiggins away, glaring at Garrus through her helmet. "I swear I will leave you on this frozen hellscape, Garrus Vakarian."

He continued to chuckle, throwing his rifle over his shoulder and striding for the exit that led to the rest of the facility.

* * *

 

Getting to the heart of the situation was a daunting task. It turned out that the whole place was on lock-down and the only way in to the labs was to manually restart the entire system. Shepard didn't discount her own hacking skills, but she was certain it would have gone much quicker if she had brought Tali along. The station's VI informed them that the massive bug creatures they kept coming across were in fact Rachni. "Rachni?" Liara asked, her archaeologist showing. "I thought they were wiped out by the Krogan 2000 years ago."

"Saren must be cloning them somehow to add to his army. As if the geth weren't enough," Garrus mused.

"Whatever he's up to, we need to stop them. History says the Rachni are bad news," Shepard sighed as they entered the station to take the tram to the labs. She shuddered at the thought of the galaxy being overrun by the scuttling horrors. The tram zipped along and suddenly she felt a tickling on the back of her neck. She spun around panicking and slapping at the sensation. When she looked up, Garrus was again laughing uproariously. When she figured out that he had been the one tickling her, she shoved him. "You stupid jerk."

"I'm sorry, Shepard, I couldn't help it," he laughed catching his balance easily from her shove.

"Some best friend you are," she grumbled, rubbing her neck then putting her back to him and crossing her arms in a huff.

"Aww, don't be a grumpy gills," he purred, throwing her own phrase back at her.

They continued on in silence. When the tram reached the lab station, they were greeted by several guns aimed at them. Shepard drew her own weapon and trained it on the threats. The situation quickly diffused as the leader realized they weren't bugs. He pointed them toward the med bay and the sleeping quarters where he insisted the scientists would have more answers than him.

Most of the people Shepard approached were twitchy and evasive and she started to get irritated. Grumbling under her breath, she made her way down into the med bay. She was surprised to note that nearly every bed was full. A doctor was standing and reading a data pad when they walked in. "Who are you?" he asked looking up from his work.

"I'm here to see Matriarch Benezia. My name is Commander Shepard, I'm a SPECTRE. What is happening here?" she approached him warily eyeing the groaning patients.

The doctor smiled halfheartedly, reading her hesitation. "They aren't contagious, Commander. One of the biologicals they were working on poisoned them. I've been trying to figure out the antidote with no luck. I know that there was one in progress at the lab downstairs, but I can't get into the lab because the security has it locked down to prevent it from spreading. It isn't airborne, but they refuse to believe me."

"Maybe I could get in the lab and get it. I'm no scientist, but I'm sure Liara here could help me." Shepard offered, Liara enthusiastically nodding her agreement.

"You better clear that with Captain Ventralis. He and his men are so hopped up on stims they might shoot you if you try to break their quarantine," the doctor warned.

Shepard nodded and headed back toward the tram entrance. The captain warned her that if they couldn't pass a medical scan after entering the lab, they would not be allowed to leave again. Having faith in the doctor she'd spoken to, Shepard nodded and headed down to the lab. The guard held them up at the door briefly before the Captain came over his comm and told him they were cleared to enter a their own risk.

Following the notes of the scientists, Shepard and Liara worked out a cure fairly easily. When they turned to leave, they were faced by an Asari accompanied by several geth. Shepard recognized her as one of the rude doctors she'd attempted to question when they'd first arrived. Narrowing her eyes, Shepard carefully pocketed her cure and drew her weapon while the Asari monologued. Shepard had a moment to think she sounded like a Bond Villain before Liara had grabbed her and threw her across the room. Shepard and Garrus took out the geth easily enough. "Gee, Garrus, we're becoming pros at shooting these guys in their flashlight faces." Shepard remarked as she reloaded her weapon.

Garrus chuckled. "I'm hitting them in their faces, Shepard. You're more of a chest and leg kind of person. You know whichever is easier to hit."

"Oh, Garrus, you're mean when you're cold," she grinned. "That hurt my feelings."

"You'll get over it," he smiled back, his mandibles spreading. "I'm just eager to get to these so called 'hot' labs. They sound inviting."

"Even if they're swarming with creepy crawlers?" she asked.

" _Especially_ if that is the case. Then I'll be warm and entertained as I watch you scurry about trying to stay out of range of their tentacles." he taunted, wiggling his fingers at her.

"Ugh, I am never gonna live this down, am I?" She shoved his hand away.

"No," was his simple answer.

They returned the cure to the doctor, finding out from a Volus along the way that the geth had come from the maintenance tunnels. Shepard expressed her need to get past the locked door and the doctor gladly offered up his card key, grateful for their help with the cure.

A few Rachni impeded their progress as they made their way through the maintenance tunnels towards a large research lab. If Liara was quiet before, Shepard had to keep glancing behind her and making sure the Asari was still there. She could understand what she might be going through. Her estranged mother was somewhere in this facility, accomplice to the rogue SPECTRE they were hoping to apprehend before he destroyed the galaxy. It was a lot to take in.

As Shepard worked to unlock the door to the lab, she glanced again at Liara. "Are you alright?"

Liara nodded. "Let us please just get this over with. I think it is worse not knowing the truth."

Shepard finished hacking the door open and they all stepped in. Up a short flight of stairs was a tall woman clad from head to toes in a long black dress with matching head cover. She turned the top of her body half way to appraise who had come through the door, exposing to view her ample bosom which was on display due to the extreme low cut neck of the dress. Her features were striking, but not as softly beautiful as Liara's. She was more angles and contrast than subtle. Forcing her eyes away from the Matriarch, Shepard took in the situation. To the right at the top of the platform stood a huge glass structure that housed the largest Rachni that Shepard had yet seen. The room itself was claustrophobic made up of oddly interconnecting catwalks that provided no open spaces. The largest open area was where the Matriarch was standing in front of the glass cage.

"You do not know the privilege of being a mother," The elder Asari said in a much deeper voice than her daughter's. She slowly moved to face them completely, placing herself at the top of the stairs, hands on her hips. "There is power in creation. To shape a life, turn it towards happiness or despair." She glanced at the trapped Rachni. "Her children were to be ours. Raised to hunt and slay Saren's enemies. I won't be moved by sympathy, no matter who you bring into this confrontation."

Shepard frowned at the woman's cold demeanor. "Liara's here because she wants to be, not because I asked her to."

Doubt crossed the Matriarch's face. "Indeed? What have you told her about me, Liara?"

Immediately, Liara spoke up, ready to challenge her mother. "What could I say mother? That you're insane? Evil? Should I explain how to kill you? What could I say?" She raised her hands, pleading in frustration.

"Have you faced an Asari commando unit before?" Benezia asked, ignoring Liara and looking to Shepard again. "Few humans have."

The threat was obvious and Shepard was infuriated. "I can't believe you'd kill your own daughter!"

Keeping with her uncaring tone, Benezia scoffed. "I now realize I should have been stricter with her." Almost as soon as she finished her sentence, Benezia glowed blue with a biotic field, unleashing it on Shepard.

The move was so fast it was impossible to dodge. Shepard watched helplessly in a stasis field as Benezia's aforementioned commando unit poured from the doors surrounding the room. As the field slowly wore off, Garrus and Liara engaged the commandos. Crates and loose pieces of the room flew through the air as a ridiculous amount of biotics were exchanged between both parties. Once Shepard found herself able to move, she joined the fray, noticing that as the commandos fell, both geth and more Asari were still coming in the doors. Shepard could see Benezia flagging as she overused her biotics, relentlessly trying to capture Liara. When the last of her flunkies went down, Benezia fell to her knees, clinging to a console in front of the cage to stay upright.

"This is not over," she stated more as a fact than as a threat. "Saren is unstoppable. My mind is filled with his light. Everything is clear."

Looking around at the destruction and thinking of everything they'd witnessed since coming to Peak 15, Shepard sighed and said, "The Rachni didn't cooperate with you, why should I?"

The struggle she was facing was clear in Benezia's posture as she stood and leaned heavily on the same console. "I will not betray him." she said through gritted teeth. "You will... You..." she spun around, and her eyes pleaded with Shepard to understand. "You must listen. Saren still whispers in my mind. I can fight his compulsions, briefly, but the indoctrination is strong."

It was difficult not to believe Benezia. "Are you saying he brainwashed you?"

"People are not themselves around Saren. You come to idolize him, worship him. You would do anything for him. The key is Sovereign, his flagship. It is a dreadnought of incredible size and its power is extraordinary."

The ship they had seen on Eden Prime? How could that be what was affecting people? "What do you mean?"

"Thoughts echo strangely within Sovereign. Its rooms are built at unsettling angles. The longer you stay aboard, the more Saren's will seems correct. You sit at his feet and smile as his words pour into you. It is subtle at first. I thought I was strong enough to resist. Instead, I became a willing tool, eager to serve." Her voice was becoming strained and her words desperate. "He sent me here to find the location of the Mu Relay. Its position was lost thousands of years ago."

"Can I assume you found the coordinates?" Shepard asked, holding a gentle hand up to keep Liara from approaching her mother as she, too, heard the tone in her voice.

"Two thousand years ago, the Rachni inhabited that region of our galaxy. They discovered the relay. The Rachni can share memories across generations. Queens inherit the knowledge of their mothers. I took the location of the relay from the queen's mind." Her shoulders slumped as she glanced at the large Rachni in the cage behind her. "I was not gentle."

"Why does Saren need the Mu Relay?" Shepard asked trying to fit all of the pieces together.

"He believes it will lead him to the conduit. I would tell you more if I could, but Saren did not share his counsel with me. I was merely a servant to his cause."

Benezia was still looking with regret at the creature behind her. "You can still make it right," Shepard coaxed, hoping Benezia was strong enough to fight just a little longer. "Give me the information."

She sighed deeply. "I was not myself, but I should have been stronger." She stepped forward, some of her strength returning after the brief respite as they talked. "I transcribed the data to an OSD. Take it. Please." She held out a small data chip.

Shepard cautiously took the OSD and secured it in a pouch at her belt as Liara finally spoke up. "Knowing the relay's coordinates is not enough. Do you know where he planned to go from there?"

"Saren wouldn't tell me his destination, but you must find out quickly. I transmitted the coordinates to him before you arrived." Desperation crept into her voice. "You have to stop... me. I can't! His teeth are at my ear, fingers on my spine." She doubled over, turning from them and clutching her head. "You should... uh, you should..."

"Mother, I... Don't leave! Fight him!" Liara pleaded, reaching for her mother.

"You've always made me proud, Liara," she said, a momentary gentleness in her voice making Liara hang her head in sorrow. When she turned back to face them again, her biotics flared. "Die!" she shouted.

Before Shepard could react or Benezia could unleash whatever she had primed, there was a loud echoing of a gunshot and the Matriarch crumbled, her hands against her stomach, covering the bullet wound. Shepard heard Garrus reload his gun as Liara whimpered.

Her voice was soft as Benezia again spoke. "I cannot go on. You will have to stop him, Shepard."

Shepard approached the woman, kneeling and rummaging in her pouches. "Hold on. We've got medigel, maybe we can..."

Benezia cut her off, taking one of her hands from the wound and clutching Shepard's forearm with surprising strength. "No! He is still in my mind. I am not entirely myself. I never will be again."

"Mother..." Liara whispered, kneeling beside Shepard.

Benezia turned her gaze to Liara, gently smiling. "Good night, Little Wing. I will see you again with the dawn." Her eyes began to become unfocused and she dropped Shepard's arm. "No light? They always said there would be..." Shepard saw the moment she passed almost as if she could see her spirit escaping her body. Her eyes glazed over and Liara sobbed noisily.

Shepard stood, backing away to give Liara a moment to say goodbye. She spared a glance at Garrus who was watching Liara with a look of pity mixed with guilt for being the one who took the killing shot. She didn't blame him. He was looking out for his team. She forced herself to move toward the giant tank full of giant bug. She placed a palm on the glass, looking in at the creature, trying to decide how to handle it. She heard Garrus' voice calling her name, but before she could turn around to address his concern, a slimy pod from the end of one of the Queen's tentacles slapped against the glass and stuck, giving Shepard a look inside of it as it suctioned to the surface. Shepard backpedaled, the thing startling her. She bumped into a body and turned to see who she had collided with. Immediately she drew her pistol, seeing it was one of the commandos. The Asari ignored her, passing by her with a glazed over look in her eyes and her mouth agape. Shepard stepped to the side, allowing the obviously dead woman to walk toward the tank. When she reached the tank, she turned, her feet almost tripping her as she faced Shepard and Garrus who had moved to stand next to each other, guns aimed at the walking corpse.

Then she spoke, her head bobbling almost comically and a secondary voice resonating as well. "This one serves as our voice. We cannot sing, not in these low spaces. Your musics are colorless."

"We filled you with enough plasma to pop a tank," Shepard said, her eyes flicking from the Asari to the pod that was still stuck to the tank.

"This vessel is at the edge, yet she struggles. You cannot see her magnificence. We are breathing on the embers. We are the mother. We sing for those left behind. The children you thought silenced. We are Rachni," the Asari droned.

"How are you speaking through her?" Shepard asked, figuring out exactly what was happening.

"Our kind sing through touchings of thought. We pluck the strings, and the other understands. She is weak to urging. She had colors we have no names for, but she is ending. Her music is bittersweet. It is beautiful." Shepard slightly lowered her weapon approaching the tank to look again at the creature behind the glass. The Queen continued. "The children we birthed were stolen from us before they could learn to sing. They are lost to silence. End their suffering. They cannot be saved. They will only cause harm as they are."

"I don't understand," Shepard said. "Why are your children killing people?"

"These needle-men. They stole our eggs from us. They sought to turn our children into beasts of war. Claws with no songs of their own. Our elders are comfortable with silence. Children know only fear if no one sings to them. Fear has shattered their minds." The last was said with spite.

"I understand." Liara's voice surprised Shepard as she spoke up, wiping tears from her cheeks. "A child left alone in a closet until she is sixteen would not be sane."

Shepard pursed her lips resolving to destroy the rest of the Rachni scuttling about the facility. "Alright. I don't think they'll give me much choice anyway."

"Before you deal with our children, we stand before you. What will you sing? Will you release us? Are we to fade away once more?" The Queen addressed Shepard, pleading. Shepard was not a fan of bugs in general, but something about a sentient being that was capable of such cognitive thought gave her pause.

"The Rachni _were_ a threat to the galaxy. Those tanks are filled with acid. If she gets out of hand, they dissolve her," Garrus pointed out.

"They made a mistake!" Liara added. "They let the Krogan go too far. This is a chance for us to atone. She has done nothing to us!"

"Your companions hear the truth," the queen drew Shepard's attention back to her. "You have the power to free us, or return our people to the silence of memory."

"If I let you live, would you attack other races again?" Shepard snapped, the conversation giving her a headache. How did one make the choice of genocide?

"No! We... _I_ do not know what happened in the war. We only heard discordance, songs the color of oily shadows," the queen confessed. "We would seek a hidden place to teach our children harmony. If they understand, perhaps we would return."

Shepard bit her lip and ran her hands through her hair. As much as she worried it might be a bad idea, she couldn't bring herself to push the button that would end an entire species. "I won't destroy your entire race. You'll go free." She sighed.

Surprise rushed through the voice of the Asari as the queen spoke through her. "You will give us the chance to compose anew? We will remember. We will sing of your forgiveness to our children."

Before she could change her mind, Shepard pressed the release button on the console in front of the tank. As the glass cage rose up toward an opening airlock, the body of the commando collapsed as the Queen released her hold. Shepard recognized the look the Queen gave her as joy and thankfulness as she scurried from her prison.

"Well, that was surprising," Garrus said as he holstered his weapon. "For what it's worth, I think you made the right decision. Mass genocide is never the answer."

"I agree," she sighed then turned to face Liara. "Do you need to go back to the ship? I'm going to the hot labs to take care of those children."

Liara stood, brushing a few more tears from her eyes, but shook her head. "No. I want to help, please."

After a scrutinizing look, Shepard agreed to let her come, then they left the room and headed to their destination. Activating the Neutron Purge to wipe out all living things in the hot labs was a cake walk after having the weight of Benezia's death and the fate of the Rachni all falling on her. All she had to do was get in, enter the code and get out before the countdown ended. Easy Peasy.

* * *

 

Shepard stood in the debriefing room while Ashley and Wrex glared at her, pissed about her decision to free the Rachni Queen. Kaidan watched her every move, reverence clear in his features. Garrus and Tali sat looking comfortable and Liara was as silent as the grave, staring off into space. Shepard pushed herself away from the console and fiddled with the OSD in her palm. "Okay, let's first address the elephant in the room."

Ashley sat forward immediately to chastise her decision. "Commander, allowing the Rachni Queen to go free was a huge mistake. Those bugs nearly destroyed the galaxy before, Didn't you ever listen in history class?"

"My people wiped them out before, but that was at full strength. The genophage has weakened our numbers. Most Krogan will not look kindly on this, Shepard," Wrex added.

"Noted," Shepard said, slapping the OSD in her opposite hand to contain her temper. "Anyone else with concerns?"

"It was a tough decision. I wasn't there, but I am sure you made the right call, Shepard," Kaidan spoke to her defense.

She nodded to him then returned her attention to the rest of them. She held up the OSD. "We were able to recover the coordinates to the Mu Relay from Matriarch Benezia. Unfortunately, we don't have information on where Saren might be headed once through the relay. It leads to several systems and we can't waste the time hunting. We need more information if we're going to beat him to the conduit." Each of the crew glanced at each other, none of them with any suggestions. Shepard sighed and continued. I'm going to ask Joker to head for Feros. There is a colony there that reported significant geth activity. I want to check it out. If there is something that Saren wants with this colony, I want to know about it. Dismissed."

 


	6. We're Gonna Need Bigger Guns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard runs into a sticky situation on Feros.

Ever since Shepard had proven herself fit for duty on Noveria, the Alliance seemed to look at her as their go to for every menial task they found near her. She was sent to hunt down a missing unit which it turned out had been attacked by a thresher maw because of a conveniently placed distress signal. She was dispatched to a ship where some biotics had kidnapped a politician to get better reparations for their 'disabilities' due to the faulty implants. They discovered that a fringe group named Cerberus was performing horrible experiments on people and aliens in the name of bettering humanity's standing in the galaxy. They had even shut down a massive army of geth who were planning to take over an entire system. That mission had afforded her some benefits at least. She was able to recover some very vital data about the geth that she forwarded to Tali. The girl deserved to bring something incredibly useful back to her people to complete her pilgrimage. Her least favorite had been a trip all of the way to the Sol system to stop a training VI on the moon that had gone haywire. The machine had fought back, sending her, Garrus and Tali scrambling from rocket drones every time they had entered a room. After shutting down the main computer, the VI had let out a horrible screech that haunted her sleep the night after the mission. It had been almost human, like its 'death' caused it pain.

Each mission she undertook distracted her from her original mission to stop Saren. It was frustrating. She felt like she was sitting on her hands. After a mission she had willingly taken on to recover Wrex's family's battle armor from pirates, she swore to herself that Feros was their next stop, no matter what. When she punched up the galaxy map to input their destination, the familiar crackle of the comms stopped her in her tracks. With a sigh, she opened the link. "What menial task does Hackett have for me today, Joker."

The pilot chuckled and said, "Not the Alliance this time. It's on a secured channel. I think it's the council."

"I'll take it in the comm room." She stepped back down from the map and the interface blinked closed. "What's one more distraction?" She grumbled to herself.

"Commander Shepard," the Turian councilor greeted her, his hands clasped behind his back. The holo projector did not convey his features well enough for her to read like she had come to be able to read Garrus.

"What's this about?" Shepard asked curtly. She was really ready to continue her mission before they ran out of time.

The councilors exchanged glances and the Asari spoke up. "We have received a distress signal from one of our intelligence teams stationed on Virmire. The message was unclear, but it was sent over mission specific channels. It has something to do with Saren."

Finally, intel. "What could you make out in the transmission?" Shepard asked.

"As I said, the message was unclear. We would, however, like you to investigate."

Shepard nodded. "Is that all?"

The councilors looked between each other again and the Salarian spoke up. "We have no other information for you, Commander."

Shepard closed the transmission, maybe a bit disrespectfully, but she had been expecting more. She decided to put Virmire on the back burner until she dealt with the colony on Feros. As far as she knew, there were no innocent colonists on Virmire. The intelligence team could hold their own for a while.

* * *

 

"This place smells wrong," Garrus snorted as they stepped out of the Normandy airlock and onto the ground at Zhu's Hope, the colony on Feros.

"What are you picking up on, Big Guy?" Shepard asked. She had learned to follow Garrus' instincts. He was a fantastic soldier and he was almost never wrong. She never left the ship without him on her six. They had developed a rhythm as they learned to read each other, almost able to tell where the other was even in the heat of battle. They barely needed to talk anymore, Garrus reading her orders in her body language and hand signals. He never missed a mark. That didn't mean they didn't talk. Shepard had never met anyone as quick with banter as she was, not until Garrus. They exchanged quips and jibes, usually, much to the chagrin of their third teammate.

"I don't know," his forehead plates moved together in a Turian frown, his mandibles close to his face. "Watch yourself, Shepard."

"Noted," she said, frowning herself as a man approached them at a jog.

"Are you here for the geth?" the man asked her breathlessly.

"We were sent to investigate," Shepard confirmed. "What is your status."

"Fai Dan wants to speak with you," the man said, not answering her question.

"Who's Fai Dan?" she asked, her hand moving to her pistol as unease fell on her shoulders.

Before the man could answer, there was a loud bang and he fell dead to a bullet through his temple. Shepard spun toward the direction the bullet had come, her pistol aimed. She saw three geth bearing down on them that had come from seemingly nowhere. Her team quickly reacted, each of them choosing a target and taking them down in their own fashion.

"Where did they come from?" Kaidan asked, moving up next to her as she started toward the colony entrance.

Shepard studied the structure, realizing that the colony had not built the place they were living in. It was old and crumbling, probably left over from the Protheans. This whole planet was covered in Prothean ruins which was why ExoGeni had decided to bring humans to this desolate place and colonize. Colonies were usually established on garden worlds where people could build farms and survive off the land, like Mindoir. Shepard cringed at the thought of her old home, but shoved the thought aside before anyone could notice. She had to help these people.

"This place has a _lot_ of structural damage, Shepard. They could be anywhere," Garrus warned. She nodded her agreement and headed inside through a tunnel.

The entrance to the colony was guarded by shaky handed civilians determined to protect their home, such as it be. She was guided to Fai Dan who turned out to be the leader of the people. He briefly explained that they had been fighting off geth as best they could while their civilization crumbled around them. Shepard cursed herself right along with Fai Dan's second, Arcelia, for not getting there sooner. Before she could apologize, they were set upon by more geth.

Shepard and her team pushed ahead, clearing out as much of the twisting staircases and tunnels as they could before returning to Fai Dan and getting a clearer picture of the situation. On top of the geth, the colony was short on food, their water pumps had stopped working, their electricity was down, and the people they spoke to were acting very strangely. Fai Dan pointed them to the ExoGeni headquarters that was set up miles away across a sky bridge.

"Okay, this is a lot to take on for one team," Shepard decided. "Let's head back to the Normandy. I'm going to take Garrus and Tali with me to visit ExoGeni in the Mako. Kaidan, you stay behind and pick two of the others to help around the colony with their troubles." Shepard started off before Kaidan could protest about not getting to go with her.

* * *

 

The sky bridge was crawling with geth. Garrus fired on them with the Mako's guns as Tali sent waves of overloads and sabotages out the windows with her omnitool. Shepard drove as carefully as possible in the high winds along the narrow pathway. The Mako was handling far better ever since Garrus had taken over its maintenance, but Shepard still found it ridiculously hard to control. She slapped her palm down on the jump jets as an armature fired on them. The Mako shot straight upwards, leaving her stomach behind and from the groans of her team, they didn't feel any more comfortable. "Shepard, there are better ways to dodge enemy fire," Garrus complained.

"I could swerve out of the way," she agreed, changing her voice to a fake old timey Southern accent. "But we're so very high up and I wouldn't want to accidentally drive us over the edge."

Garrus chuckled. "Honestly, Shepard, the fact that were still driving in a straight line is a first. Just warn me next time you're going to use the jump jets."

"Yes, Shepard, I don't want to throw up in my suit. That is not a pretty situation," Tali added. Shepard could hear the smile in her tone. As hard as Garrus had been to learn to read, Tali had been the real challenge. Deciphering a faceless helmet was like learning a new language. It had been a challenge that Shepard had dedicated herself to in the last few months. Tali had a great personality once she opened up to you. She was bubbly and hyper and always willing to help. She also had a secret sarcastic side that Shepard was very fond of. Shepard had dared use the word plucky only in her head to describe the Quarian.

As they made their way across the bridge, they began picking up on a comm signal. Shepard patched into it, fumbling with the dial with one hand while steering with the other. "Edge, Shepard!" Garrus warned as she drifted to the side in her distraction.

She swerved back to the center of the bridge as they smashed through one of the metal road blocks the geth had set up in their way. Just then, she was able to find a clear signal and patch into the radios. She heard a female voice that was apparently close enough to see their Mako driving down the bridge. Ahead was a garage door that lifted as they approached. Shepard slowed the Mako and stopped in front of a ramp leading down to the next level of the bridge. "I want to see if whoever this is has any information," she said, opening the hatch and climbing out of the tank.

Garrus and Tali followed close behind. She found a group of people who told her they were scientists that worked for ExoGeni. Some of them were openly rude about preserving the company's secrets and dared to try and keep her from continuing to the facility where they had seen a geth ship perched on the side like a barnacle on a ship. Shepard frowned at the man named Jeong, crossing her arms and prepared to invoke her rights as a SPECTRE, but before she needed to, the woman standing with him stepped forward. "Commander, my name is Juliana Baynham. Jeong here is more concerned with covering his ass than saving everyone else's. I have to ask you to go to the facility. My daughter was left behind when we evacuated. Please, if you could help find her while you're there, I would be in your debt."

"I'll keep an eye out," Shepard assured her with one last glare at Jeong as she turned to leave. "I _promise_ I am not after your company secrets. I just want to make sure everyone is safe."

Once they were back in the Mako, Shepard ground her boot into the gas pedal in anger. "What a bosh'tet," Tali mumbled as the Mako jerked forward.

Shepard forced the Mako down the twisting ramps, using the jump jets to help her make swifter turns. She was angry at these scientists. No one had even asked about the colonists except the Baynham woman. As they slammed to the ground at the bottom of the ramps, Shepard turned toward the garage exit to the second stretch of the sky bridge. This half was much the same as the first cluttered with road blocks and geth. They made it to the facility in record time as Shepard simply took her anger out on the geth by running them over and smashing through all of their road blocks.

* * *

 

Garrus was worried about Shepard. He could tell she was blaming herself for the state of this colony and the amount of geth present. They _had_ made a lot of stops along the way, but that was hardly her fault. She was just following orders. Garrus watched the set of her shoulders as she sped across the sky bridge. He hardly needed to shoot anything as she tore a path through the geth with the Mako, a sure sign that she was pissed off. They stopped just outside the facility, unable to fit the Mako through the narrow doorway. Shepard climbed out and pulled her shotgun, ready for anything. They picked their way through the rubble of the Prothean ruins that the ship had attached itself to. At the inner entrance, there was a barrier blocking their way. "Dammit, we need to find a way inside," Shepard growled, kicking the barrier.

Garrus scanned the area with his visor picking out the size of the barrier and any possible weak spots. "We can go down there, Shepard, but it looks like a one way drop. It's too high to climb back out of."

She walked stiffly over to the hole in the ground that looked like it used to be a stairwell of some sort before the years had eroded away at the stone. "Be ready for anything," she sighed as she sat down on the edge, her legs dangling over the open space before she slid down to land a good 10 feet down. Tali followed her, maybe not as gracefully, but without hesitation. Garrus brought up the rear, always watching Shepard's back. The loyalty he had for her often caught him off guard when he would rush to her aid when her shields would fall or if she got herself into a particularly sticky situation. It didn't seem to strike her as odd, like it did him. Perhaps she was simply used to everyone following her every order without question. Something about Shepard simply screamed 'obey' even though she hardly shouted or had to say more than a few words of command before her people fell in line. She had even tamed Wrex for the most part. She was more than their superior officer. She was their friend. Her way of doing things was different from any he had ever seen. Never in the Turian military or C-sec had he ever felt as comfortable taking orders as he did under Shepard.

They crept down a short hallway toward a wide open space that looked like an underground tunnel. Garrus had a split second to wonder where it led to before Shepard stepped past the wall into the area and her shields were clipped by a bullet. He charged forward, coming around the corner himself and aiming his assault rifle toward the assailant.

"Shit! Dammit! I'm so sorry." The woman who had shot at Shepard raised her hands in complicity as they all turned their weapons on her. "I thought you were Varren or one of those geth things."

Shepard lowered her shotgun and raised her hand for the others to do the same. Garrus lowered his rifle slightly, but remained in his shooting stance, just in case. "Who are you? What are you doing here?" Shepard asked the woman.

"My name is Lizbeth Baynham. I was trapped here when the geth ship landed. As soon as it attached to the building, that barrier came up. I think the ship is powering it," the girl answered, her hands still in the air.

"It's okay, you can put your hands down," Shepard offered, stepping a little closer to the nervous woman. "Why didn't you evacuate with the others?"

"It was my own stupid fault. I stayed longer to try and back up some data. By the time I was ready to leave, the barrier had come up."

"Do you know why the geth may be here? What's their interest in your labs?" Shepard asked.

The girl hesitated, but with some gentle coaxing, she opened up. "I think they may be here for the Thorian." Lizbeth continued on to tell them that the Thorian was a plant native to Feros. ExoGeni had been studying it because if its unique ability to influence minds.

"We know Saren can control people, Shepard. We saw it on Noveria," Garrus pointed out.

Shepard nodded her agreement. Her lips were pressed together tightly. "How can we get into the labs from here?"

Lizbeth pointed them to a doorway behind them and offered up her ID card to help them into the systems in case they needed it. "Good luck with those geth," she called as they walked off.

Garrus followed Shepard through the door and up a stairwell where they heard shouting about halfway up. Shepard drew her gun and quietly made her way up toward the noise. It was a Krogan arguing with a VI that was telling him he had no authorization to access the information he was asking for. Garrus could not locate any other threats and communicated as much to Shepard with a short shake of his head at her upraised eyebrows. She stepped out of her cover and got as close to the Krogan as she dared. When the VI asked him to step aside because there was a queue forming behind him, the Krogan spun and attacked. Shepard was prepared with a neural shock and her shotgun. They brought the Krogan down with their combined skills, interrupting his regeneration.

Shepard had a short conversation with the VI after it reminded them that the use of fire arms was strictly prohibited on ExoGeni property. Garrus chuckled at Shepard's indignant expression as she crossed her arms and used Lizbeth's ID to question the VI. It informed them that Lizbeth had not told them the entire truth about the Thorian. Her fists clenched as it mechanically recited information about the experiments that ExoGeni had been performing on the colonists who had been infected with the Thorian's mind control spores. "That's why those people were acting so weird," Garrus said, his subharmonics growling in resonance with Shepard's rage at ExoGeni.

She turned to him and her eyes narrowed in determination. "This Thorian has to die."

They continued further into the labs, finding geth all over. They killed all they could and stopping at a section of the ship that was sticking through the wall. There was a bright light surrounded by geth kneeling on the floor. After dispatching the geth, Garrus said, "If I didn't know any better, I'd say those geth were praying."

Shepard examined the light as Tali said, "That is ridiculous. Geth are machines. They don't have a 'god'. They see the Quarians as their creators because we built them. They don't think on faith like organics."

"Whatever they're doing we need to shut them down. Getting rid of this ship is the only way to power down that barrier," Shepard said, leaving the floor open to suggestions.

"I'll bet taking out even one of these claws will cause that ship to detach and fall," Garrus suggested.

"Sure," Tali agreed. "but we don't have enough ordinance to even dent that metal. It's too thick."

"Let's see if there is another solution further ahead," Shepard sighed, rolling her shoulder and hefting her shotgun.

They pushed onward, through more geth. When they reached the docking bay higher up the structure, they discovered the door opened and still intact. After killing the geth in the area, Shepard approached the door controls and smirked as she read the notice. Garrus wondered what she was up to when she began furiously typing on the console. He watched the psi on the hydraulics gauge slip into the red zone and Shepard slammed in the button to close the door.

The door came crashing down with the sound of ripping metal as it chopped the claw of the geth ship clean off. The structure, as he had predicted, fell from the side of the building. As soon as the ship fell, he heard their comms crackling. Realizing that the geth had also been blocking their comms to the Normandy, he heard Joker's voice coming through. Shepard placed her fingers to her ear so she could hear better. "Joker, that you?"

"There you are, Commander! We have a situation here."

"What is it?"

"After Kaidan's team returned, we had a few minutes before the colonists, uh, freaked out. They're outside the ship banging on the hull."

"Dammit," Shepard cursed to herself before re-opening the comm. "Hold tight, Joker. It's not like they can do any damage from outside. Just, lock the doors."

"Yeah, sure Commander. Just, uh, hurry back. I don't want them to damage my baby."

The comms silenced and Shepard sighed. "It must be the Thorian. Let's get back."

When they reached the door out that had originally been blocked by the barrier, they were met by Lizbeth Baynham. Shepard had a few curt words with the girl about her lies before Joker radioed them again about the geth heading their way. "Let me help!" the girl pleaded. "What ExoGeni did to these people. I don't agree with it."

Shepard agreed to allow her to come, reluctance clear in her voice. Garrus sat beside Lizbeth in the back of the Mako as Shepard picked off the geth she had missed on their way there. The girl smelled of fear, and regret. They heard an argument over the Mako's radio that sounded like Lizbeth's mother and the man named Jeong. Shepard pulled over when the girl recognized her mother's voice. "We do this quiet," Shepard warned Lizbeth as she crept toward the room where they'd been holed up in before.

Shepard crouched behind a crate on the ramp leading down and listened to Jeong threatening the elder Baynham. Lizbeth was beside her, tension in her body language. When Jeong had her mother restrained and held a gun to her, Garrus hissed softly as Lizbeth dashed from out of cover. He saw Shepard reach for her and miss then Lizbeth shouted, "Get your hands off her!"

Juliana wrestled free of her captors and ran toward her daughter. "Lizbeth!" They hugged as Jeong's face turned red.

"Alright, I know you're there! Come out! The lot of you!" Shepard stood, sighing, and stepped out of cover as Jeong waved his gun at her. Garrus and Tali followed. "Shepard! I guess it was too much to hope that the geth would take care of you. This is a disaster! We were contacted when the comms came back online. ExoGeni wants everything here shut down and covered up. You are a loose end I don't need."

Shepard didn't bother holding her hands up as he brandished the pistol. He didn't scare her and she let him know it. "You think I will let you just abandon the people of Zhu's Hope after what you've done to them?" Her arms were crossed in defiance.

"I don't have a choice. ExoGeni..."

"Has no say in the matter anymore." Shepard finished his sentence for him.

"You can't do that!" he shouted, Shepard not phased.

Garrus saw her fingers caressing her pistol as she calmly told the man how things were going to happen. Had he not agreed to her terms, Garrus was certain Shepard would have had no qualms with putting him down. Shepard was definitely the one to stick up for the little guy. Garrus respected that part of her.

With Jeong properly cowed, Shepard turned her attention to saving the colonists. Everyone agreed that destroying the Thorian was the only way to go about doing that. "Shepard, if the Thorian is controlling the colonists, won't it try to use them as cannon fodder to protect itself?" Tali asked.

Shepard grunted her agreement. "I may have a solution to that problem," Lizbeth offered. "Do you have any modifiable grenades?"

"Of course," Shepard frowned as she showed Lizbeth the flat discs attached to her belt.

"You could mod them with a nerve gas we developed based on the Thorian spores. It should knock out the colonists if they attack you," Lizbeth hurried over to one of the crates that were scattered around with ExoGeni's secrets tucked inside.

"Nerve gas? It seems like flooding the air around me with nerve gas would be a little counterproductive," Shepard was frowning.

"It should only affect those under the control of the Thorian. You have not been on Feros long enough to be affected." Lizbeth assured her, handing her a pouch full of individual mods for her grenades and a packet for each of the mods with a green goop inside of them.

Shepard's upper lip curled as she studied the disgusting looking substance, but she thanked Lizbeth. They returned to the Mako and Tali modded Shepard's grenades while Shepard guided the Mako back toward the colony.

"Let's hope these work," Shepard commented as she clipped the modified grenades to her belt within easy reach. The garage door hadn't opened as they approached, Garrus assumed, because the colonists in control of it were too busy attacking the Normandy.

They got out of the Mako and as they approached the entry console, Garrus smelled a rotten scent and looked down at a figure hunched around itself. As they got closer, he drew his weapon and the thing stood up. It clearly had once been a human, but it was clearly no longer in that category. It's head was bald and its skin a sickly grey. The skin was rotten and stretched over a thin frame, the eyes hollow black holes in its skull. As soon as it launched itself at the closest target, Garrus aimed to kill it, but was forced to hold his fire. The thing was on top of Shepard so fast that he would have risked hitting her if he fired on it. She was wrestling with it, trying to get her pistol up to shoot it, but Garrus could tell it was stronger than her. He pushed past Tali and grabbed the thing by the back of its neck, trying to pull it off Shepard. Its teeth were chomping as it tried to get a hold of Shepard. He pulled as hard as he could, slowly gaining the upper hand as Shepard helped by getting her arms up and onto its chest to push. They finally managed to pry it off of her and Tali unloaded her shotgun into its face. Garrus turned his face away and dropped it as its head exploded right next to him. "Ugh, gross," Shepard commented as she wiped creeper off her cheek. "That thing tried to bite me."

"Well you just look so tasty," Garrus quipped, plucking a bit from her hair that she'd missed.

"Good to know," she said. "What the hell was that thing?"

"Whatever it was, it's been like that a very long time, so don't worry about it being one of the colonists," he assured her.

"Well, let's get in there and do something before it's too late for them. Make sure that if there are any more of these things, you don't hit the colonists while you're firing at them," Shepard warned.

"Of course," Garrus agreed as Tali nodded vigorously.

Inside the colony there were definitely more of the creepers. It felt like there was actually an infinite number of them. They came from everywhere. Garrus carefully disposed of them as both them and the colonists swarmed them at every turn. Shepard carefully used her grenades, arranging larger groups of colonists together with herding shots before detonating them to spare the precious gas and more lives.

By the time they'd reached the freighter that was blocking the entrance to the Thorian's lair that Lizbeth had told them about, most of the colonists had been dispatched to Shepard's grenades. There was creeper splattered everywhere and Garrus hoped that the damage they were doing with their awful smelling spit wasn't going to be permanent. Shepard had already complained that it was burning her skin. They approached the console and Shepard opened the hatch leading to a stairway that led down. Before they got much further, they were approached by a barely lucid Fai Dan. He was rambling about 'trying to fight it', and Garrus noticed the gun in his hand. "Shepard," he warned as the gun waved around as Fai Dan raved.

Shepard reached for a grenade to pacify the man, but her face screwed up in frustration as she reached for what wasn't there. She'd used all of her grenades on the rest of the colonists. Garrus watched her struggle with the decision on what to do about him and suddenly Fai Dan made her decision for her. The gun was up faster than even Garrus could respond. He saw Shepard twitch like she was going to try and stop him, her muscles tensing and her hand lifting slightly, but Fai Dan was faster. His head exploded with the power of the close range self inflicted shot. Shepard turned her head away as the body fell to the ground, closing her eyes. He saw the weight of Fai Dan's death settle on her shoulders before she finally looked up and started silently toward the stairway.

* * *

 

They made their way down for what felt like forever. Shepard was uncharacteristically quiet. "You saved as many as you could," Garrus heard the platitude slip from his mouth and cursed himself as soon as he said it.

Shepard spared him a glance that said she understood his intention but remained silent. Tali finally broke the silence again. "We need to find the creature and determine.... oh."

Her idea was cut off as they entered an enormous hollow chamber and in front of them hung a pulsing, dripping plant like structure. The smell coming off of it was worse than the creepers' rotten scent. He recognized it from when they had first stepped off the Normandy. It still smelled wrong. "We're going to need bigger guns," Shepard said almost softly enough that he thought he might have been the only one to hear her.

They approached the monstrosity slowly as the pulsing started getting faster. It was making awful squishing sounds that Garrus wished he couldn't hear. From between large tentacles dangling from the bottom of the thing, out slid a slime covered green skinned Asari. Garrus saw Shepard rear her head back and cover her nose with her wrist which she immediately removed, remembering the bits of creeper still on her armor. "Invaders!" the Asari shouted. "Your every step is a transgression. A thousand feelers appraise you as meat, good only to dig or decompose."

"You know, I'm getting tired of listening to Asari speak for other races like drones," Shepard sighed, crossing her arms as the Asari continued.

"I speak for the Old Growth, as I did for Saren. You are within and before the Thorian. It commands that you be in awe!"

Shepard scoffed, definitely not in awe. "You enslaved the colonists! You destroyed their minds. I don't know what Saren wanted with you, but I just want you dead."

"The Thorian is a piece of this world, extending across the land and back through the ages. You can no more kill it than cut the sky!" The Asari puppet suddenly lashed out with powerful biotics that dropped Shepard to the ground. "Your blood will feed the ground and the new growth!"

Garrus reacted, shooting the green abomination until she fell. He had seconds to help Shepard to her feet before a slew of creepers rushed them. Shepard pulled her shotgun out and began blowing the creepers backward to avoid their fluids. Her eyes were narrowed as she scanned the area between shots. He could see her regretting the lack of grenades to toss at the giant plant, and then her eyes widened and she shouted. "Shoot the arms!"

"Shepard, it doesn't have arms!" Garrus shouted back, thinking that his translator may have botched the meaning behind whatever she was talking about.

"Oh, for Pete's..." she grumbled into her comm. "The long sticky, viney things that are attached to the wall!"

Garrus looked around and spotted what she meant. "Oooh, hmm," he rumbled in his subvocals, trying to figure out what else they could be called. "Can we agree on 'Node'?"

"Whatever! Just shoot them!" She shouted, unloading on a few creepers that were advancing on her.

They slowly made their way upwards around the perimeter of the room, fighting creepers and eliminating nodes. The Thorian continued spitting out more clones of the Asari that had spoken for it, each time throwing some pretty nasty biotics into the mix. "It is weakening," Tali observed as the creepers became fewer in number and less organized.

"Keep pushing. We need it to fall," Shepard ordered. It took them at least twenty minutes to make their way around the room. When the final node was detached, the Thorian let out an animalistic shriek and they each covered their ears as the monstrosity fell into the depths below it.

Shepard kept looking around to be certain that there were no more creepers in their midst. Garrus heard a sound like ripping flesh and nudged Shepard to give her a heads up. Moments later he discovered the sound was coming from a pod on the wall that ripped open and spilled out a pus covered Asari. She got to her feet, wobbling and trying to wipe the gunk from her. Shepard approached her and Garrus noticed that she looked exactly like the Asari clones that the Thorian had kept vomiting out, except, her skin was purple like it should have been. She must have been the original. "I'm free!" she said in shock, looking at the three of them. "I'm free," she repeated. "I... I suppose I should thank you for releasing me."

"How do I know this isn't some kind of trick?" Shepard asked warily.

The Asari looked insulted. "This is no trick," she spat. "The Thorian is dead and I am myself again." Her tone softened again. "My name is Shiala. I serve... I served Matriarch Benezia. When she allied herself with Saren, so did I. Benezia foresaw the influence Saren would have. She joined him to guide him down a gentler path, but Saren is compelling. Benezia lost her way."

"Are you saying that Saren can control minds?" Shepard asked her, crossing her arms and sounding thoroughly disbelieving. Garrus frowned before he realized that Shepard must be fact checking by asking a question like that. Clever.

"Benezia underestimated Saren, as I did. We came to believe in his cause and his goals. The strength of his influence is troubling." Shiala responded.

"Asari Matriarchs are some of the most intelligent and powerful beings in the galaxy. How could one fall under Saren's control?" Shepard was being very careful to not reveal anything that had happened on Noveria.

"Saren has a vessel. An enormous warship unlike anything I've ever seen. He calls it Sovereign." Garrus saw Shepard's lips quirk upwards almost imperceptibly as she took in the repetitive information, knowing that the truth was now irrefutable. "It can dominate the minds of his followers. They become indoctrinated to Sovereign's will. The process is subtle. It can take days, weeks, but in the end, it is absolute. I was a willing slave when Saren brought me to this world. He needed my biotics to communicate with the Thorian, to learn its secrets. Saren offered me in trade. I was sacrificed to secure an alliance between Saren and the Thorian."

Shepard sighed in sympathy. "Saren's pretty quick to betray his own people."

The Asari's features twisted into an amused smirk. "He was quick to betray the Thorian, too. After he had what he wanted, he ordered the geth to destroy all evidence of its existence. Saren knows you are searching for the Conduit. He knows you are following his steps. He attacked the Thorian so you could not gain the Cipher."

Shepard dropped her nonchalant stance and focused on Shiala. "What's the Cipher? And why did Saren need it?"

Shiala's smile was sympathetic. "The beacon on Eden Prime gave you visions, but the visions are unclear, confusing. They were meant for a Prothean mind. To comprehend them, you _must_ think like a Prothean. You must understand their culture, their history, their very existence. The Thorian was here long before the Protheans built this city. It watched and studied them. When they died, it consumed them. They became a part of it."

"So, the Thorian taught Saren to think like a Prothean? How?" Shepard looked anxious. Garrus knew she was thinking they had killed their only source of information, because he was thinking it too.

"The Cipher is the very essence of being a Prothean. It cannot be described or explained. It would be like describing color to a creature without eyes." Garrus saw Shepard almost deflate as the Asari seemed to tell her that she was never getting her hands on the Cipher. "To understand, you must have access to endemic ancestral memory. A viewpoint spanning thousands of Prothean generations. I sensed this ancestral memory, the Cipher, when I melded with the Thorian. Our identities merged, our minds intertwined. Such knowledge cannot be taught; it simply exists."

Shepard's voice was near to pleading. "I need that knowledge to stop Saren!"

"There is a way." Shepard stepped closer to the Asari again, her shoulders rising with hope. "I can transfer the knowledge from my mind to yours, as I did with Saren." Shepard nodded, inches from the Asari now and Garrus was getting nervous. "Try to relax, Commander. Slow, deep breaths, Let go of your physical shell. Reach out to grasp the threads that bind us, one to another." Shepard closed her eyes briefly as Shiala reached out. "Every action sends ripples across the galaxy. Every idea must touch another mind to live. Each emotion must mark another's spirit. We are all connected. Every living being united in a single, glorious existence. Open yourself to the universe, Commander. Embrace Eternity!" When the Asari looked up after finishing her speech, her eyes were an inky black. Shepard stared into them, a small smile in her face before Shiala grabbed her upper arms gently. Shepard began to visibly shake, not violently enough to be a seizure, but Garrus didn't like it. He stepped closer. After what felt like and eternity, Shepard stilled and Shiala backed away. They exchanged a brief stare, each weighing the others intentions. Shiala spoke first. "I have given you the Cipher, just as it was given to Saren. The ancestral memories of the Protheans are a part of you now."

Shepard rubbed her forehead as if it was paining her and Garrus reached out a steadying hand. "Shepard, are you alright?"

Shepard shuddered, but she turned a smile on Garrus. "I saw... something. It still didn't make any sense."

Shiala sounded offended again. "You have been given a great gift: the experience of an entire people. It will take time for your mind to process this information."

"Maybe getting back to the Normandy and letting Chakwas take a look at you is a good idea," Garrus suggested, his steadying hand still resting near Shepard's arm in case she stumbled. She looked drained, pale.

"I am sorry if you have suffered, but there was no other way. You needed the Cipher. In time, it will help you understand the vision from the beacon," Shiala explained, genuine sympathy passing over her face.

"Now that you're free of the Thorian, what are you planning to do next?" Shepard asked.

"If you allow it, I would like to stay here with the colonists. They have suffered greatly, and I played a role in their suffering. I would like to make amends."

Shepard sighed in what Garrus interpreted as relief. "The colonists will need all the help they can get. They'll be happy to have you on their side." Garrus could guess that Shepard was thinking about the suffering that her own colony had undergone years ago as her eyes looked distant.

"Thank you, Commander. May fortune smile upon you."

They all made their way back toward the colony and the Normandy. Shepard was leaning on Garrus, allowing herself some weakness. With a short stop to talk with Juliana and Lizbeth who had made their way back to the colony and were helping to pick up the pieces, They slowly returned to the Normandy.

* * *

 

Against all of Garrus' protests, Shepard refused to go to the med bay to allow Chakwas to look her over. Instead, she made her way to her cabin to change out of her armor and immediately called a debrief in the comm room. She still felt shaky, but she felt the need to get this over with. Instead of standing as she usually did, Shepard pulled up a chair beside Kaidan who was eyeing her suspiciously. She assumed from the looks of concern on everyone's faces that Garrus and Tali had told the others what had happened in the Thorian chamber.

Liara was the first to speak up. "You look... pale. I know that a knowledge exchange meld can be very taxing. Are you suffering any ill effects from the Cipher, Commander?"

Shepard rubbed her face with her palms, digging the heels of her hands briefly in her eye sockets. Everyone's eyes were on her when she looked up. "I'm not gonna lie, the Cipher shook me up a bit." Shepard heard a disapproving hum coming from Garrus' subvocals.

Liara wrung her hands nervously before speaking up again. "I might be able to help you. I am an expert on the Protheans. If I join my consciousness to yours, maybe we can make some sense of it."

Liara had informed Shepard, during one of their many talks, that joining of consciousness with an Asari was akin to a sexual experience, which may have been why the girl's cheeks were flushed lavendar. Shepard didn't care. She needed any advantage she could get against Saren and Liara was offering that. She stood and approached the center of the room. "Do it. Hurry. We don't have much time."

Liara came to stand in front of her. After another brief flush of her cheeks, she spoke up, closing her eyes. "Relax, Commander. Embrace Eternity!" When she looked up, the flash of her eyes was black just as Shiala's had been. Shepard fell into Liara's gaze and suddenly she was seeing the vision again. Images of destruction flashed in front of her eyelids. Pain, terror, and a warning. When the vision ended, Shepard found herself awkwardly embracing more than eternity as she and Liara clutched each other. Her heart was racing as she pulled away, crossing her arms over her chest and feeling her own cheeks flushing pink. What had they been doing as the vision assaulted her? Kaidan's look of disappointment said it had been pretty intense. "That was incredible," Liara gasped, a palm over her own heart. "All this time. All my research, yet I never dreamed... I'm sorry. The images were so vivid. I never imagined the experience would be so... intense. You are remarkably strong willed, Commander. What you've been through, what you've seen, would have destroyed a lesser mind."

"Did you see anything?" Kaidan asked in a clipped tone.

Liara didn't seem to notice his annoyance as she continued. "The beacon on Eden Prime must have been badly damaged. Large parts of the vision are missing. The data transferred into the Commander's mind is incomplete."

"You must have seen _something_ ," Shepard begged, frustrated that she may have gone through the ordeal with Shiala for no reason.

Liara turned a gentle smile to Shepard. "I _was_ able to interpret the data relayed through your vision. What was there, at least, but something was missing. Saren must have the missing information. Maybe he found another beacon. If we can find the missing data from your vision, I can..." Liara swayed on her feet, touching her forehead with the tips of her fingers. Shepard steadied her with a hand and guided her to a seat. Shepard had been feeling remarkably better after melding with Liara, but it seemed her weakness had been transferred. "I am sorry. The joining is... exhausting. I should go to the med bay and lie down for a moment."

"Dr. Chakwas should take a look at you," Shepard advised and Garrus let out a short unamused chuckle.

"Good advice, Shepard," he said pointedly.

"That will not be necessary," Liara smiled again. "I just need some rest. Somewhere quiet."

Shepard looked around the room and realized that there was really nothing left to say. "We're done here. Dismissed."

Everyone filtered out of the room, Tali helping Liara to get to the med bay. Joker informed her that he had sent the report about the mission and asked if she wanted to talk to the council. Uninterested in their opinion after the chastising she'd received for releasing the Rachni Queen, she declined the vid call. She left the room and made her way toward her cabin, feeling the need to figure out their next move. Halfway down the stairs, she bumped into Kaidan, literally. He steadied her as she apologized for not paying attention. His hand lingered on her upper arm and after the experience with Liara, her body reacted in a very embarrassing manner. She hoped he didn't notice the look on her face as butterflies flitted around in her stomach as his hand slid down her arm instead of him simply letting go. "Is everything alright, Shepard?" he asked, concern in his brown eyes.

She nodded, biting her lip and trying to control her hormones. The mind meld had her all wound up. She was going to need some serious time at the punching bag to work off steam. Suddenly Garrus' words jumped to the forefront of her mind. She decided to take advantage of her current state and allow herself a bit of flirting just for the sake of it. "That's not the appropriate way to address your commanding officer, Lieutenant," she said, a teasing lilt in her voice.

Kaidan seemed to step back a bit, his cheeks flushing. "Sorry ma'am. I think I got a bad signal. If you're uh... maybe there's someone else you'd rather confide in."

She frowned. Had he not heard how she had said that? "Someone else?"

"Maybe I'm wrong," he sighed. "but you don't need to spend your off duty time with me if you don't want to."

"Look, you didn't wanna talk about this mystery person, did you? What's your real issue?"

"I just don't want to see you get hurt, Shepard, You looked terrible when you came back from Feros, yet you still pushed yourself to debrief everyone, then you let Liara do... whatever it was that she did. You're important to me, Commander. I wanna help." he confessed, closing the space between them again.

"Important, huh?" she said, a grin spreading her lips.

"Look if I'm out of line, just say the word." There were those endearing puppy dog eyes.

"You're not out of line, Kaidan, but there _are_ regs." she sighed, wishing she wasn't such a soldier. This was one rule she would love to break.

"I get ya, Shepard. I don't make a habit of complicating the chain of command. Just... think about what I said and take care of yourself." He continued past her, leaving her very hot and bothered. To put the icing on the cake he stopped and turned his head to smirk over his shoulder. "And don't worry Shepard, this thing we have will work itself out some night, sooner or later."

She couldn't help the groan of frustration that escaped her throat. She stood against the wall of the stairwell and caught her breath. She suddenly didn't want to go back to her cabin. Being alone with extranet access was probably a bad idea. She instead got in the elevator and took the interminably long ride down to the cargo bay. "Hey there, Big Guy," she said, approaching Garrus and trying to lean casually against the Mako.

He looked up from what he was doing and then he smirked, one mandible lifting away from his face and his eyes scanning her. "Did you by any chance just have a conversation with Kaidan?"

"What!?" she pushed away from the Mako, crossing her arms with indignation at how easily he had read her. "No..."

He chuckled, shaking his head. "I can smell the pheromones all over you, Shepard. Lying is useless."

"Yeah? Well, stop sniffing me," she huffed.

This chuckle was underlined with a hum from his subvocals. As she imagined the vibration in his chest, her breath caught and her body once again betrayed her. "You alright, Shepard?" Garrus asked, his expression showing her that he was unsure of what was happening.

He reached out a hand to steady her and she backed away holding up her hands palms out to ward him off. "No offense Garrus, but I really don't think you should touch me right now."

His eyes narrowed as he studied her, his eyes sweeping her all over. Goodness, even that was making her nearly swoon. She wasn't even attracted to Garrus, but his eyes were such deep pools of intensity. When she took another step away and took a deep breath to control herself, his eyes suddenly widened and amusement spread over his plates. "Oh, I see what's going on here. Liara dug a little deeper than the Cipher, didn't she?"

"Oh, God!" Shepard hid her face in her palms as she felt the heat rise to her cheeks. He purred again as he laughed. She pointed her finger accusingly. "You need to stop doing that," she said, backing a third step from him.

Genuine confusion painted his face. "Doing what?" he asked, the question resonating in his subvocals as well.

"You're purring," she accused. "I can't..." she swallowed hard and the only solution she could think of was to flee. Maybe alone with the extranet was exactly what she needed.

 

Shepard remained in her cabin until the overwhelming desire to get naked with just about anyone had passed. When she finally ventured forth, she made it to the mess hall where Garrrus and Tali were sharing a meal. Thankfully, no one else was in sight, so she crept into the kitchen to pour herself some coffee. After adding cream and sugar, she decided to get over her embarrassment and face whatever teasing Garrus was going to lay on her.

She walked to the table where they sat and joined them. "Hey, guys. How are my two favorite dextros doing today?"

"That really depends on how weird you're going to be about being able to hear my subvocals, Shepard." Garrus grinned.

"You can hear Turian subharmonics?" Tali asked, genuinely interested.

"Can't everyone?" Shepard asked sipping her coffee and allowing the warm comforting piece of heaven slide down her throat.

"They don't normally resonate on a frequency that is perceptible to human ears. Mostly everyone says there is a metallic sound to my voice. Almost like how you can tell Tali is talking through a filter because there is a secondary echo." Tali nodded her agreement as Garrus explained.

Shepard frowned. "Well, I could always hear yours, Garrus. I never noticed on other Turians because I never worked closely enough with one to try and get to know them. Sometimes it is a hum when you're thinking or distracted. When you get angry or scared, you growl, deep in your chest. And when you're happy or laughing, you sound like a purring tiger."

Tali and Garrus both looked at her like she was growing a second head. "That's certainly a unique talent for humans," Tali chirped as she tucked some of her decontaminated food into the slot of her helmet where it was filtered a third time before she could fully take it into her mouth.

"I knew you were weird, Shepard, but that is abnormal," Garrus chuckled, some of that purring resounding beneath it.

"What's abnormal?" Kaidan asked, appearing from the crews' quarters and situating himself beside Shepard. He tossed her a private smile which she returned.

"Shepard can hear my subharmonics," Garrus informed Kaidan.

"You're kidding," Kaidan looked shocked.

Shepard shrugged. "I honestly didn't know humans weren't supposed to be able to. It's not a big deal. It just helps me understand his moods better I guess."

"You _have_ gotten very good at understanding all of your people," Tali said sounding impressed. "Most aliens don't bother getting to know a Quarian, let alone how to read moods through a helmet. I don't know how you do it, Shepard."

"I like knowing my crew," Shepard shrugged again. "It leads to better communication on the battlefield, and less lonely down time between missions." The last she directed at Kaidan with a private wink out of sight of the others, letting him know that she was still interested even after her sexual high had dissipated. He practically beamed at her in return.

"So," Garrus hummed, catching her attention. "Now that we still don't know where Saren is going after he hits the Mu Relay, what's our next move?"

"I think we should look into that intel from the council. They told me one of their spy networks reported in from Virmire with a distress signal over a 'mission specific' channel. They know it has something to do with Saren, but that was all the information I got." Shepard, said having decided their course of action the night before as her fog wore off. "I already have Joker on course. We just need to wait out the travel time."

 


	7. The Hardest Choice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caught between a rock and a hard place, Shepard must decide to sacrifice one of her own.

The Mako dropped out of the Normandy with a huge splash and Joker flew the Normandy out of reach of the AA guns that peppered the garden world. Garrus, Kaidan and Shepard caught their breath in the tank before heading off to disable the guns blocking Normandy's descent. A loud, hollow crashing sound was persistently giving Garrus a headache as Shepard guided the Mako through the foot deep water and attempted not to hydroplane. There were brief reprieves as they stopped to disable guns and kill geth to get through the blockades in their path.

Instead of sloshing through the water on foot, Shepard was taking out as many geth as she could by running them over while Garrus picked off the flying drones with the Mako's guns. Kaidan was unusually quiet as he watched Shepard from the passenger seat. She seemed oblivious, but Garrus could smell both of them sharing pheromones in the confined space. Just as he was starting to feel awkward, Shepard grunted and said, "There's a beach ahead."

She gunned it towards the shore as Joker's voice came over the comms. "We got here Commander, but it looks like we're grounded. I'll let the Salarians explain when you guys get here."

"Wonderful, more blockades," Shepard growled, looking as if she were as ready to get out of the Mako as he was.

They parked the tank close to the shore and waded in to the beach where the Salarian team had set up a makeshift camp. The rest of their squad was standing around while the Salarians had a conversation with Ashley. Kaidan followed Shepard toward the group and Garrus stepped to the side to listen as the higher ups decided what to do.

"What's the problem?" Shepard asked, immediately crossing her arms as she approached the Salarian that seemed to be in charge.

"The problem is that every AA gun on the planet knows you're here. We can't get out of here until the rest of the reinforcements show up." The Salarian said.

"We _are_ the reinforcements," Shepard corrected looking no more amused than she had in the Mako.

"What are you talking about? We asked the council to send the fleet," the Salarian sputtered.

"The message we received wasn't clear. The council sent us to investigate," Shepard sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"That is redundant. We've been dying down here 'investigating' Saren's lab."

"Well, now you have us. What can we do to get everyone out of here?" He watched as Shepard entered her protection mode, her stance changing and her eyes focusing.

The Salarian, who informed them his name was Captain Kirrahe, spun a plan to blow up Saren's lab with an explosive they would build using their ship's drive system. Garrus liked the plan until Kirrahe explained that Saren had found a cure for the genophage that had been inflicted on the Krogan people. It was an effective sterilization of the entire species only allowing one in one thousand of pregnancies to progress to completion. It had been a solution to the Krogan rebellions that had happened over a thousand years ago. Salarians and Turians had both had a hand in inflicting the genetic sterilization and Krogan were not fans of either species. Wrex overheard Kirrahe and immediately hated the plan. He stormed off to the far side of the shore and proceeded to shoot at fish with his shotgun. "He won't be a problem, will he? We have enough Krogan to deal with."

"I'll talk to him," Shepard said holding up a complicit hand. "What is the rest of your plan for getting a bomb that big to the right spot?"

"Your ship can deliver the device, but we will need a way in. I have several teams ready to go, and I would like for you and your squad to act as a Shadow team, sneaking in the back while we assault the front door." Kirrahe explained.

"No offense, Captain, but your people are going to get slaughtered," Shepard pointed out.

"No, I do not expect many of us will make it out of here, which is what makes what I must ask even harder. I would like to request you send one of your people with my teams to help coordinate the assault."

The air was silent, no noise but the waves lapping on the shore while Shepard narrowed her eyes at the Captain. She opened her mouth to turn him down, Garrus was sure, but before she could, Kaidan spoke up. "I'll go, Shepard."

"Not so fast, LT," Ashley interjected. "They will need you to arm the bomb. You have the training. I'll go with the Salarians."

Shepard looked back and forth between the two of them. Garrus could see by her expression that she absolutely hated this plan, but Ashley continued to insist. "Fine, Ashley you go with Kirrahe's men. If that is all for now, I need to go tame a Krogan."

Garrus watched Shepard stomp off toward where Wrex was still sulking. Garrus' fingers twitched near his sniper rifle when Wrex turned toward Shepard, shotgun still in hand. The wind carried their conversation in the other direction, giving him no idea what was happening. Suddenly, Wrex and Shepard drew down on each other and Garrus almost pulled his rifle to train on Wrex, but he had come to know the Krogan really well and was counting on Shepard to be able to use her friendship with the giant walking landmass to talk him down. His confidence was in Shepard, not Wrex's ability to reason. After a few really tense moments where Garrus' heart pounded in his chest, and Shepard's vitals read off the charts on his visor, they both lowered their guns and Wrex took Shepard's offered handshake. Garrus let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding and unclenched his fists.

Shepard made her way back up the beach toward the others and had another short conversation with Kirrahe. She then approached him and turned to face the direction he was looking to watch over everyone as they prepared. "What's your take on this, Big Guy?" she asked softly, a sigh overlapping her words.

She smelled, for lack of a better term, worried. "Hell, I dunno, Shepard, but I think Ash can handle herself. You may want to keep Wrex on a short leash though, just as a precaution."

Shepard nodded as if she had been thinking the same thing. After Kirrahe addressed his men and everything was mapped out, Shepard elected to keep Wrex and Garrus on her team. For once, Kaidan didn't question her. He led the rest of the crew, sans Ashley, back onto the Normandy to wait for them to infiltrate the facility and take down the AA guns so they could get in and land to deliver the bomb.

* * *

 

Shepard, Garrus and Wrex made their way through the area on foot, killing geth and quietly assisting Ashley's team to get by easier. They knocked out communicators, blew up the drone's refueling station and shot down a satellite link to end the geth's air strikes. When they reached the facility's back door, they were met by a slew of Krogan that threw themselves at the group. Wrex was instrumental in taking them down. While Shepard and Garrus tried to focus on head shots, he was ripping away their regeneration ability with his biotics.

After entering the first door, Shepard and Wrex kept an eye while Garrus hacked a console to shut down security and make it easier to move around without detection. Shepard watched him work, his brow plates furrowed as he looked over the map of the facility. "I can shut down security from here, but I can also set off some alarms on the other side of the place to keep them off us."

"No," Shepard shook her head. "Ash and the Salarians have enough trouble. We can handle the guards on our end. Shut down security, but leave the alarms silent." Garrus nodded and tapped a few more buttons before backing away from the console and taking his weapon back out.

They fought through the facility, freeing some Salarian prisoners, but noticing that the majority of the ones there were beyond saving. They were raving as Saren's indoctrination flooded their minds from over exposure. After taking an elevator up a few floors, they stepped off into a room full of stasis fields that contained husks. Shepard had encountered these abominations before on Eden Prime. They were once humans, transformed by the geth using some unknown technology that made them crazed half human, half machine and all around horrible creatures that would rip you apart given the chance. She shuddered as they walked past the first row of frozen husks. At the far end of the giant laboratory, stood a Krogan warlord. When he noticed their arrival, he began raving and released all of the husks and Krogan he had at his disposal.

It was a hard fought battle. Shepard used her shot gun as husk after husk came at her, trying to flank her and jump on her back. She didn't like that she had been backed into a corner, but she had no other choice. The husks were fast and to keep them off her, she needed to be able to see them from all sides. She caught glimpses of her squad in similar positions. Wrex was taking on as many Krogan as he could while Garrus finished them off. She took a moment to be thankful that the husks were mostly focused on her for whatever reason and weren't jumping on Wrex's extremely exposed hump. She gunned down a few more then in the brief respite, she tapped out her overload program quickly while stealing another glance at the others. Her heart sunk briefly as she saw two husks making their way around behind Garrus as he focused his rifle on the Krogan coming at him. "Garrus! On your seven!" She cried, knowing her shotgun was not in range to help, and her overload was not complete.

He heard her, spinning just in time to swat the two husks away with the butt of his rifle, swinging it like a bat. She sighed with relief as she saw him safe and her omnitool sounded its readiness. She overloaded a few of the stasis fields that remained full of husk and watched the things fall before even getting out. An agonizingly long time later, she glanced around and saw that they had managed to all make it out with no more than scratches. One of the husks had attempted to bite her and she rubbed at the teeth marks on her neck as Garrus jogged over to turn her head, her chin in his fingers. He studied the wound and slapped her neck with some medigel to stave off any potential infection and his tongue clucked in a strange noise she had never heard from him before. She took it to be similar to the tsk that Dr. Chakwas would use on her when she would hurt herself by accident. She grinned at his mother hen impression and slapped him on the shoulder before jogging ahead to continue through the facility. "I'm glad I let you talk me down, Shepard," Wrex grumbled, following close behind. "These weren't real Krogan. They were just pawns for Saren."

She grinned, knowing she needn't say anything to accept Wrex's apology. That he had admitted any wrongness on his part was a testament to their friendship. She simply said, "The Krogan deserve better."

Finally, they came upon what looked like a reception room. Cowering behind a desk to the right of a locked door, was a beautiful Asari. Shepard's mind flashed back to her meld with Liara and she turned her head to hide the flush that came to her cheeks. "Please!" The Asari whimpered. "My name is Rana Thanoptis. I'll help you get to Saren if you let me go. I don't want to become indoctrinated. I just wanted to help the Krogan."

Shepard did not trust the Asari, but if she would let them through the locked door, It seemed like a fair trade. She crossed her arms and said, "Unlock the door, but then you had better start running before the nuke goes off."

"Oh goddess!" The woman rushed to a console and the red lock on the door immediately turned green, then she quickly fled in the direction they had come from.

"That was fun for you, Shepard," Garrus smirked and she shrugged.

"I didn't trust her to not stab us in the backs. Now she's too busy running to care about us." Shepard made her way to the freshly opened door and into a hallway that led to an elevator.

The elevator only had two floors. Theirs and up. They loaded in and took the mercifully short ride up to what she assumed was Saren's office. When the doors opened, they piled out, weapons at the ready only to be greeted by a large open room that had a catwalk at the top which led down into a hollowed out space that held... "Is that a Prothean Beacon?" Garrus asked, his subharmonics resounding in awe.

Shepard nodded and walked cautiously down the ramp and approached the beacon. Silently praying the Cipher would keep her conscious this time around, she touched the beacon. The helplessness came, just as the last time, lifting her body into the air and tensing her muscles to rigidity as more images flooded her mind. A cluster of planets and more images of destruction and death brought a single tear to her eye as the Beacon slowly released her. She dropped down to one knee as she fell from the stasis, breathing heavily to recover herself. At least she wasn't unconscious. She stood slowly and wobbled back toward Garrus and Wrex to leave. Obviously Saren was not here. Just as they were about to go back to the elevator, Garrus' steadying hand on her back, a booming synthetic voice resounded through the room. "YOU ARE NOT SAREN."

Shepard turned to see a huge red silhouette filling the open space between the catwalk and the floor. She stepped closer and Garrus' hand fell away from her shoulders. "Is that a VI interface?" he asked, stepping up just behind her to her right.

She could feel his presence, lending her strength as she rebuilt her own that she had lost to the Beacon. "RUDIMENTARY CREATURES OF BLOOD AND FLESH. YOU TOUCH MY MIND, FUMBLING IN IGNORANCE, INCAPABLE OF UNDERSTANDING."

"I take that back. That is not a VI," Garrus said before the speaker continued.

"THERE IS A REALM OF EXISTENCE SO FAR BEYOND YOUR OWN, YOU CANNOT EVEN INAGINE IT. I AM BEYOND YOUR COMPREHENSION. I AM SOVEREIGN."

Shepard gasped her understanding. "Sovereign isn't just some Reaper ship Saren found. It's an actual Reaper!"

"REAPER? A LABEL CREATED BY THE PROTHEANS TO GIVE VOICE TO THEIR DESTRUCTION. IN THE END, WHAT THEY CHOOSE TO CALL US IS IRRELEVANT. WE SIMPLY ARE."

Wrex spoke up, a voice of contention. "The Protheans vanished 50,000 years ago. You couldn't have been there. It's impossible!"

"ORGANIC LIFE IS NOTHING BUT A GENETIC MUTATION, AN ACCIDENT. YOUR LIVES ARE MEASURED IN YEARS AND DECADES. YOU WITHER AND DIE. WE ARE ETERNAL. THE PINNACLE OF EVOLUTION AND EXISTENCE. BEFORE US, YOU ARE NOTHING. YOUR EXTINCTION IS INEVITABLE. WE ARE THE END OF EVERYTHING."

"There is an entire galaxy of races united and ready to face you," Shepard threatened, stepping one foot forward, and clenching her fists. This thing sure had a superiority complex.

"CONFIDENCE BORN OF IGNORANCE. THE CYCLE CANNOT BE BROKEN."

"Cycle?" Garrus asked, a restraining hand falling on her shoulder.

"THE PATTERN HAS REPEATED ITSELF MORE TIMES THAN YOU CAN FATHOM. ORGANIC CIVILIZATIONS RISE, EVOLVE, ADVANCE, AND AT THE APEX OF THEIR GLORY, THEY ARE EXTINGUISHED. THE PROTHEANS WERE NOT THE FIRST. THEY DID NOT CREATE THE CITADEL. THEY DID NOT FORGE THE MASS RELAYS. THEY MERELY FOUND THEM, THE LEGACY OF MY KIND."

"Why would you construct the mass relays, then leave them for someone else to find?" Shepard was getting tired of the ramblings, but the Reaper was giving her so much information that she wanted to know more.

"YOUR CIVILIZATION IS BASED ON THE TECHNOLOGY OF THE MASS RELAYS, OUR TECHNOLOGY. BY USING IT, YOUR SOCIETY DEVELOPS ALONG THE PATHS WE DESIRE. WE IMPOSE ORDER ON THE CHAOS OF ORGANIC EVOLUTION. YOU EXIST BECAUSE WE ALLOW IT. AND YOU WILL END BECAUSE WE DEMAND IT."

"So they're harvesting the best of the universe when we advance to the level they want us to. Then they don't need us anymore so it's bye bye," Garrus said, doing a hell of a job summing up the speech.

"What do you want from us?" Shepard asked, raising her voice as the creature's lack of inflection started to grate on her nerves as it spoke of the races of the galaxy like bugs. "Slaves? Resources?"

"MY KIND TRANSCENDS YOUR VERY UNDERSTANDING. WE ARE EACH A NATION, INDEPENDENT, FREE OF ALL WEAKNESS. YOU CANNOT EVEN GRASP THE NATURE OF OUR EXISTENCE."

Shepard would not accept the bluster. This was obviously not an organic being and it was speaking like it was a god. "Where did you come from? Who built you?"

"WE HAVE NO BEGINNING. WE HAVE NO END. WE ARE INFINITE. MILLIONS OF YEARS AFTER YOUR CIVILIZATION HAS BEEN ERADICATED AND FORGOTTEN, WE WILL ENDURE."

"Where are the rest of the Reapers? Are you the last of your kind?" Shepard was going to squeeze every bit of information out of this thing as she could get.

"WE ARE LEGION. THE TIME OF OUR RETURN IS COMING. OUR NUMBERS WILL DARKEN THE SKY OF EVERY WORLD. YOU CANNOT ESCAPE YOUR DOOM."

Shepard had heard bluster before, but this _thing_ sure had a lot of it. "You're not even alive. Not really. You're just a machine and machines can be broken!"

"YOUR WORDS ARE AS EMPTY AS YOUR FUTURE. I AM THE VANGUARD OF YOUR DESTRUCTION. THIS EXCHANGE IS OVER." As the Reaper finished its speech and the interface blinked out, something caused the windows surrounding the room to explode inward, the glass raining down on them.

Wrex stood uncaring of the flying shrapnel, but Garrus had put himself between the windows and Shepard as she ducked. "You alright, Big Guy?" she asked, after things had settled down.

"Just the usual flesh wound," he smirked, shaking some glass out that had landed in his cowl. She snorted and plucked out a larger piece that had lodged between the inner protective layer and the outer rim of his armor.

They started to make their way to the elevator as Joker's voice came over the comms. "Commander, we got trouble."

They jogged into the small space and closed the doors as Shepard responded. "Hit me, Joker."

"That ship, Sovereign. It's moving. I don't know what you did down there, but that thing just pulled a turn that would shear any of our ships in half! It's coming your way and its coming hard! You need to wrap things up in there... fast!"

The elevator let them out and Shepard turned to Wrex and Garrus. "Let's head to the breeding facility, Joker can pick us up after we set the nuke."

Her blood was pumping after both receiving the beacon's information and speaking with Sovereign. The mission she had almost ignored had turned into the most profitable one yet. Now all that was left was to strike a blow and get the hell off of Virmire. On their way to the breeding facility they managed to come across the controls for the AA guns around the facility. She powered them down and watched the Normandy swoop in. They fought to the large open area, geth and leftover Krogan in their path. When they arrived, she further assisted Joker to bring the ship in and land by blowing up a few giant fuel tanks that were in the area, blocking his descent.

Kaidan and the Salarians slowly carried the bomb from the Normandy's cargo bay, setting it in the spot that would yield maximum damage. As Kaidan set to work, she received a transmission from Ash. "We're almost ready to evacuate, Williams. Get your ass to the rendezvous point, double time!"

"Negative, Commander." Shepard's blood ran cold as the words came through her communicator. "The geth have us pinned down on the AA tower."

Kaidan looked up from what he was doing. "Go get her, I need time to arm the bomb anyway."

"We're on our way, Williams!" She signaled for Wrex and Garrus to follow her as she ran off toward the tower. "Hang tight!"

They ran into some hoppers on their way to the elevator that would take them to the tower. Shepard mowed through them, desperate to get to Ash so they could all get off Virmire in one piece. She'd lost Jenkins on Eden Prime, she'd be damned if she was going to lose Ash too, just as they were starting to get along. The elevator ride felt especially long and when they reached the top, they were set upon by a few more geth. Just as Garrus sniped the last of the bunch, Shepard heard a drop ship over head. "Look out, LT!" Ashley shouted over the comms. "There's a drop ship headed your way."

"They're already here!" Shepard stopped in her tracks as Kaidan shouted over gunfire.

"Kaidan! Can you hold them off?" She pleaded, glued to her spot. If losing Ash was a blow, she would never forgive herself if Kaidan didn't make it out alive.

Her hands shook as his response was not what she had hoped for. "There's too many of them. I'm arming the bomb. Go get Ash."

"What the hell are you doing Alenko?!" she shouted, subconsciously turning back toward the elevator.

"No way, Commander. You've gotta protect that bomb. Go help, Alenko," Ash's voice was resolved. She had accepted Shepard's decision before it had even been made.

Shepard closed her eyes, her shoulders slumping as she tried to find a way. "Hold out as long as you can, Ash. We'll go get Alenko and then swing back for you. Shepard was already jogging toward the elevator as she spoke, her decision to save Kaidan burning her eyes as she told Ash to hold out. Saving as many people as possible meant making sure that bomb would detonate.

"We both know that won't happen, Commander. You made the right choice, for what it's worth, I'm proud to have served under you. Give 'em hell for me." Ash cut off her communicator before Shepard could respond. Shepard's rage at the geth and Saren manifested itself as a punch to the elevator walls as they made their way back down to the breeding facility.

There was a strange noise coming from Garrus' subvocals that she had never heard before, but she pushed it out of her mind as she focused to do what needed to be done. There were indeed a lot of geth unloading from the drop ship when they arrived. Shepard and her squad immediately started taking them out as soon as the doors opened. In the mess of fighting, Shepard did not see Saren arrive on his hover board until he was throwing biotic warp fields at them. She ran for cover, the water at her feet slowing her down. She scrambled for cover and saw Kaidan hit with one of the stray attacks. He fell to the ground beside the bomb and Saren proceeded to ignore him. In response to her panic Garrus shouted, "He's alive, Shepard."

They were huddled behind an outcropping in the wall that barely served as cover, but it would do. Saren stopped his attacks and Shepard saw an opening. She stood from her cover and spun to draw down on Saren. He was a shell of a Turian, most of his face and body enhanced with cybernetic implants and replacement parts. Shepard felt a pang of pity as she realized he must have been indoctrinated, just as all of the others. She fired multiple shots at him with her pistol, only to have them bounce off his biotic barrier. Realizing the uselessness of wasting the ammo, she stopped a ways back from him, still pointing her gun at him as he stood calmly and waited for her tantrum to be over. "I applaud you, Shepard. My geth were utterly convinced the Salarians were the real threat. An impressive diversion. Of course, it was all for nothing. I can't let you disrupt what I have accomplished here. You can't possibly understand what's really at stake."

Reasoning with Saren was probably a terrible idea, but Shepard couldn't help trying to save him from Sovereign. "Sovereign and its kind destroyed the Protheans! What else is there to understand?"

"You've seen the vision from the beacons, Shepard. You, of all people, should understand what the Reapers are capable of. They cannot be stopped. Do not mire yourself in pointless revolt. Do not sacrifice everything for the sake of petty freedoms. The Protheans tried to fight, and they were utterly destroyed. Trillions dead. But what if they had bowed before the invaders? Would the Protheans still exist? Is submission not preferable to extinction?"

Saren paced as he spoke and Shepard could sense doubt buried deep within him. "Do you really believe the Reapers will let us live?"

Frustration boiled over in Saren's voice as he answered her. "Now you see why I never came forward with this to the Council. We organics are driven by emotion instead of logic. We will fight even when we know we cannot win, but if we work with the Reapers... If we make ourselves useful... think how many lives could be spared! Once I understood this, I joined Sovereign, though I was aware of the ... dangers. I had hoped this facility could protect me." Saren sighed almost so low that Shepard couldn't hear.

"You're afraid Sovereign is influencing you. You're afraid he's controlling your thoughts." She poked at his doubt, trying to elicit a change of heart.

"I've studied the effects of indoctrination. The more control Sovereign exerts, the less capable the subject becomes. That is my saving grace. Sovereign needs me to find the Conduit. My mind is still my own... for now. But the transformation from ally to servant can be subtle. I will not let it happen to me."

"Sovereign's manipulating you and you don't even know it! You're already under its power!"

"NO! Sovereign needs me. If I find the Conduit, I've been promised a reprieve from the inevitable. This is my only hope!" He sounded like a mad man now. Shepard knew she needed to act.

"Together, we can stop Sovereign. We don't have to submit to the Reapers. We can beat them!" She pleaded, hoping her usual persuasive talents would win out.

"I no longer believe that, Shepard. The visions cannot be denied. The Reapers are too powerful. The only hope of survival is to join with them. Sovereign is a machine. It thinks like a machine. If I can prove my value, I become a resource worth maintaining. There is no other logical conclusion!"

"You were a SPECTRE!" Shepard accused. "You were sworn to defend the galaxy. Then you broke that vow to save yourself!" She spat her words out, harshly letting Saren know just how far he had fallen.

"I'm not doing this for myself! Don't you see? Sovereign will succeed. It is inevitable. My way is the only way any of us will survive! I'm forging an alliance between us and the Reapers, between organics and machines, and in doing so, I will save more lives than have ever existed! But you would undo my work. You would doom our entire civilization to complete annihilation, and for that, you must die!" Saren lashed out with no more warning than that one sentence.

Shepard dove back into the tiny cover that Wrex and Garrus were both squeezed into as well. Saren climbed back on his hovercraft and began circling the area. Shepard scanned the area and spotted a few more places they could use for cover. With a few quick hand gestures, Garrus and Wrex both nodded and she took off, followed by Garrus. She fired blindly as she ran getting a few lucky shots in but barely denting Saren's shields. They were top notch technology. "Oh that is cheating!" she complained loudly as she slammed herself into the cover she'd chosen. "We need to overload those damn shields! Ready, Big Guy?" she shouted as Garrus started typing furiously on his omnitool interface.

She started her own program as Wrex distracted Saren with his biotics. Garrus' overload hit, dropping a little of the wind out of Saren's sails, but his shields remained intact. Her overload missed, as Saren dodged his board to the side to get away from Wrex. He was now out of her sight line and she cursed, bringing up the overload program again as quickly as she could. Garrus took a few shots at Saren with his sniper rifle while she prepared. Saren was still out of her sight, so she jumped out of cover and fired her overload as soon as she spotted Saren. His shields went down with a satisfying sound of broken glass. He turned on her as Garrus and Wrex took the opportunity to hit his armor a few times. All she saw now in his cybernetic eyes was rage. He threw a full biotic shockwave in her direction, the water in front of her exploded, spraying her and blinding her as the wave got closer. She backed up, but the shockwave hit her and knocked her off her feet. She landed beside the bomb and Kaidan who was slowly recovering to sit up. As she spared a glance at him, Saren came at her, jumping off his hover board with a swiftness born of anger and his upgrades. The panicked cries of her squad mates resounded around her as Saren picked her up off the ground by her neck and held her above him, choking her. She felt the air leaving her and she needed to do something. Saren turned his head, distracted by the bullet that hit his shoulder from Garrus' rifle. Garrus was already reloading to shoot again and Shepard gathered all of the strength she had left and punched Saren in the face.

Her fist connected with the metal on his mandible and cheek that was holding his face together. He dropped her and shook his head as she fell to her knees, gasping to recover her breath. Something must have made him realize that he was outnumbered and Saren ran for his hover board and flew off, leaving her pointing her pistol at his receding figure. She considered wasting a few bullets to shoot at the air behind him, but she remembered that the bomb was active. They couldn't have much time left. She turned and ran for Kaidan who was still on the ground as the others regrouped around her and the bomb. She held her hand out and he took it, standing and leaning heavily on her. Saren's biotics had ripped through Kaidan's shields and left a nasty cut along his abdomen. She pushed her hand against the wound, and helped Kaidan stumble to the Normandy. They were the only ones left that could get out in time. If Saren hadn't showed up, they could have gone back to save Ash, too. She cursed him and Sovereign to herself as she slammed her fist over the button to close the hatch. "Get us out of here, Joker! Toot Sweet!"

"Everybody hang on!" Joker said as he piloted the ship away from the ground and quickly made the jump to FTL so they could avoid the blast.

Shepard struggled to get Kaidan to the elevator and up to Dr. Chakwas, but her strength was waning, she had barely caught her breath after Saren had choked her. Just as her knees were about to give way, Garrus swooped in and took her burden. He turned his head when she stopped to lean her palms on her knees and breathe heavily. "Don't think you're avoiding the med bay, Shepard. Come on." She tried to wave him off but it quickly became clear he was not budging until she got on the elevator with them. "Not only did Saren just hold you in the air by your throat, but you have other cuts and bruises and that husk bite that need attention." She let out a ragged sigh as he drove his point home.

Without a word, she followed. They rode up the interminably long trip in silence. Shepard because her throat hurt when she spoke and Garrus because he was clearly in protect mode and could probably smell her discomfort. She leaned heavily on the wall of the elevator as it crept upwards. When the doors finally opened, Chakwas was waiting for them. Garrus and her took Kaidan to the med bay and Shepard strode along behind, slowly deflecting from the destination in the hub bub. When Chakwas and Kaidan disappeared in to the med bay, she turned and tried to make a dash for her cabin. All she wanted was a hot shower that would wash away the taint of the decision that had led to Ashley's death. She was stopped in her tracks by a firm hand wrapped around her bicep. "Dammit," she cursed, her throat straining the word out.

"Nice try, Shepard," Garrus said, tugging her along behind him as he stalked back to the med bay.

"Chakwas has a more urgent patient," she croaked, still protesting but allowing him to drag her so she would be spared the indignity of him hoisting her over his shoulder.

"Indeed she does, but Liara is willing to take a look at you in the mean time," he said as the doors slid open. He positioned her in front of him and gently pushed her forward toward a waiting Liara. The girl's eyes were slightly hazy and reddened. Shepard could tell she had been crying, more tears just glistening beneath the surface, waiting until the emergency was over.

Shepard grunted as Garrus firmly sat her down on one of the examination tables across the room from where Kaidan lay. Chakwas was working swiftly to staunch the bleeding and get him stable before removing his armor and getting to the root of the issue and stitching him up. She heard a growl from Garrus' subvocals as she apparently ignored some order that Liara had issued while she stared and prayed for Kaidan. She redirected her attention and forced an "I'm sorry," before Liara continued.

After a more than thorough examination that left Shepard feeling like she had taken more damage than she really had, Liara softly dismissed her with some pills to help with the swelling and an antibiotic for the husk bite. She gathered herself up and slowly left the med bay as Liara joined Cakwas to lend her assistance. Garrus followed closely behind her as she shuffled to her cabin, removing bits of her armor in preparation for that shower. He followed her inside her cabin and she was too tired and her throat hurt too much to protest. She shrugged out of the rest of her armor and he silently stood in her doorway, just far enough inside to allow the doors to close behind him. She gathered a set of her civvies and closed herself in the bathroom to clean up, knowing he would wait.

When she stepped in the scalding water, she could no longer fight her emotions. Tears began to stream soundlessly down her cheeks and she leaned her forehead against the cool metal surface of the shower wall. Crying hurt her throat, but she felt like she deserved it. Ashley was dead and it was her fault. She had let her go off without the team, she had decided to save Kaidan. She was to blame for the death of a fantastic soldier, a sister, a daughter, her friend. Her chest closed up, the grief overwhelming her and she gasped for air, a pitiful grief filled moan escaping her. She had hoped to cry it out quietly while Garrus waited, but she knew he had heard that. She slid down to curl up around herself, letting the water pelt her back while she sobbed.

When she felt numb and didn't think she had anymore left in her to give, she reached up and turned off the water. It had begun to go cold and she shivered when she stood, grabbing a towel and quickly removing the water from her body then slipping into her civvies as if her body were moving without her mind. Her mind was elsewhere, chasing Ashley's ghost. When she left the bathroom, Garrus was waiting, just like she knew he would be. He had taken her discarded armor and piled it neatly by her table and he was sitting in her desk chair, his own armor on the floor beside him. When she came out, he stood and looked at her, his eyes appraising. She awkwardly ran her hands through the mess of hair that she hadn't bothered to brush and bit her lip, looking for some sort of reaction to the display she had put on for him to hear. Her heart skipped with relief when his only movement was to open his arms for her.

She crossed the space between them, in three steps and curled up against his chest. He closed his arms behind her, the warmth of his body a very welcome comfort after the chill from the shower. He ran gentle fingers through her hair, careful with his talons. A soft noise was deep in his subvocals and she could only call it a keen. It was the same tone she'd heard in the elevator just after she had made the decision to leave Ashley behind. It was a sad sound, but it was also comforting. They shared each other's pain and grief for a very long while. Shepard was exhausted and while Garrus held her, she was able to stop thinking for just a little while. She must have fallen asleep on her feet as he supported her because the next thing she knew he was carrying her to her bed. "Garrus," she mumbled as he set her down.

"Shh," he insisted softly, pulling his warmth from her side. "You need to rest Shepard. It's been a long day."

She shuddered and sat up as he turned to retrieve his armor. "Wait," she nearly shouted in her desperation. As silly as it sounded, she felt like she needed him. She bit her lip as he turned around, a confused look painting his features, his penetrating blue eyes full of concern. "Would you please stay?" She wasn't sure why she wanted him there, but she had felt so safe while he held her that she would probably not sleep again that night if he left.

He studied her with his own look of understanding slowly creeping into his expression. He nodded almost imperceptively and began to sit back in the desk chair. She protested and patted the bed beside her. She needed him close. Again, he hesitated, studying her but finally he walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed opposite her. She pulled her comforter up and laid down with her back facing him. It felt like forever before he joined her, not under the covers but respectively placing that barrier between them. She sighed, snuggling closer to him and stealing the natural warmth that always radiated off him. She slowly drifted off again, allowing the trials of the day to overwhelm her consciousness.

* * *

 

When Garrus woke up, he forgot for a moment where he was. In his groggy state, he glanced around, letting reality reassert itself. The first thing he saw was a mess of fiery red hair. He frowned for a moment and then the events of the previous day came flooding back. Ashley was dead. Shepard and Kaidan were injured and he was sleeping in Shepard's bed. When he had heard the awful sobbing the night before as she had showered, he hadn't known what to do. Seeing Shepard so vulnerable was probably a once in a lifetime occurrence. Sometimes it was hard to remember that she was, after all, just a person. Ashley's death had hit her hard. She was blaming herself. He had known she would, as soon as she had made the decision to turn around and protect the bomb and Kaidan.

She had her back to him and his chest was pressed up against her, his right arm draped over her waist. She snored softly, barely a whisper. Her scent was everywhere, vanilla and cherries and Shepard. His left arm was pinned beneath her neck and he knew if he tried to move he would likely wake her up. She needed the rest. He knew for a fact that Shepard was a fairly light sleeper even on good days. Turians did not need as much sleep as humans, and she would often come down to the cargo bay to work out at all hours while the others were asleep.

His neck creaked as he shifted his head and he became very aware of the lack of Turian friendly pillows in Shepard's cabin. A pained hiss escaped him before he could swallow it. Shepard stirred, groaned and sighed before asking him, "What time is it, Big Guy?" That she remembered so quickly who she was sleeping beside and didn't regret it calmed his awkward nerves.

"Uh, I would check, but you're laying on my omnitool, Shepard," he grumbled, his voice still husky from sleep.

She chuckled and lifted her head to let him pull his arm from beneath her. He rolled away from her, and she followed, shifting onto her back and stretching. He watched her yawn, fascinated by human functions. Suddenly, she seized and curled back up into a ball. "Ow, ow, shit! Garrus! Help!" she pleaded.

He panicked, thinking he had done something to her by accident. "What, Shepard? What's wrong?"

She hissed in pain and moaned, sticking her leg in his face, nearly kicking him. "My calf! Craaaaaamp! Make it stoooooooop!"

He grabbed her leg to get it out of his face and he could feel the tension in the bit just below her knee. Her muscle had balled up, which he figured could not be very comfortable. "What am I supposed to do, Shepard?" he asked, completely out of his league.

She gasped, breathless. "Force my foot flat, gently, then massage the knot out," she coached, throwing her head back as the muscle seized again beneath his fingers. He did as he was told while she ow, ow'd to herself. "Shit," she gasped, catching her breath as the muscle eased under his touch. She had turned sideways on the bed and as she relaxed, she slid down onto the floor laughing. "I never thought that was how I would get a morning after massage from a Turian."

He chuckled, moving to his knees to look down on her. "Spirits, Shepard, is that a regular occurrence?"

"At least weekly," she said, sprawled out on the floor, her hair and clothes a mess. "The joys of being human, huh?"

"If that's joy, I'd hate to see suffering," he quipped, standing up over her and reaching his hand down to help her up. She stood and flexed her foot before putting weight on her leg.

She smiled at him a moment longer and then she seemed to remember why he was in her room, sleeping in her bed and he watched the light leave her eyes and her hand fell out of his. "I wonder if she suffered."

He didn't need to ask who she was talking about. "It's not your fault, Shepard. You know that, right? It was an impossible decision and you acted to save the most people you could. It wasn't a choice between Ash and Kaidan, it was a choice between Virmire and the universe. Ash knew that. It's why she told you to go back for Kaidan and the bomb."

Shepard absorbed his words, looking close to tears again. She inhaled deeply and he saw her put on her Commander face and shut out her feelings. He sighed as she buried herself and said, "I should check on Kaidan and debrief everyone else."

She rubbed her upper arms as if she was cold and he wanted to hug her again, but he knew that his comfort was no longer welcome as she steeled herself to face the others. She turned and left him in her room to gather his things and let himself out.

* * *

 

Shepard headed from her room and straight toward the med bay. She was hungry, but that could wait. Garrus' words rang truer the more she thought about it, but that didn't mean she had to like it. She still felt the weight of Ash's death like she was being dragged under with her. Before she could get to the med bay, the doors whooshed open and Kaidan stepped out. Relief flooded her as she saw him standing on his own two feet. "Kaidan," she gasped.

His attention fell on her and he graced her with a halfhearted grin as he approached where she had stopped in her tracks. She hugged herself again, snuggling deeper into her hoodie and missing Garrus' warmth. She didn't think she would feel warm for a very long time. "Shepard, are you alright?"

She scoffed, a short sound that appeared, even to her, more like a cry for help than the laugh she had meant it to be. "I should be asking you that question."

He shrugged, stepping closer to her, his lost puppy look in full swing. "Doc says I'll be alright. I wanted to thank you..." his words trailed off as he looked over her shoulder toward her cabin.

She glanced behind her and saw Garrus casually strolling out of her door, carrying his armor from the previous day. It must have looked really suspicious, but she ignored it, drawing his attention back with a hand on his shoulder. "What for?" she asked, not believing she should be thanked by anyone for what had happened.

He raised his eyebrows, "Oh, nothing, just my life, Shepard. You could have just as easily kept on going to help Ash, but you came back for me."

Shepard allowed her hand to linger on his shoulder. "I never could have left you behind, Kaidan. You know that."

He boldly took her hand in his, squeezing it gently to let her know he was aware of how she felt. "I truly am grateful, but I think it may take some time to get over the case of survivor's guilt I'm carrying. I can't imagine what you must be going through."

She returned the squeeze and gently pulled her hand away. "I need to call a debrief. Would you like to walk with me?"

He nodded, joining her as she turned away and headed for the stairs up to the CIC. They walked quietly, each leaning on the other's strength, but both vulnerable. When they reached the comm room, Shepard sent out the summons to the crew to make their way up to the meeting.

Kaidan sat silently next to an empty chair while Shepard attempted to stand but found out quickly that she lacked the willpower to do so for very long and joined Kaidan in sitting. They both stared at the empty seat that Ash used to sit in as the rest of the crew filtered in. Garrus was the first to show, having changed quickly into one of his sets of civvies. When he sat down, Kaidan watched him with narrowed eyes, but Garrus was watching her, concern etched all over his face. She gave him a tight lipped smile and Wrex sauntered in next. He flopped down in his usual chair, looking unaffected by it all. When Tali and Liara joined them, Liara barely had control of her tears and Shepard could hear Tali sniffling under her helmet. She allowed everyone to settle in before she began. "Thank you all for coming. I know that we are all feeling Ash's death, but she was a soldier and she knew the risks going in. I had to make a decision to protect the many by sacrificing the few. It was a difficult decision, but I refuse to blame myself. The only one to blame here is Saren, and I won't let Ashley's death be in vain by sitting around mourning her while Saren gets everything he wants."

"Commader?" Liara spoke up, her words choked but audible. "Excuse me for interrupting, but I have an idea. I think the beacon you found in Saren's base was similar to the one you found on Eden Prime. It may have filled in the missing pieces of your vision. I might be able to help you put all those pieces together."

"You want to join our minds again, don't you?" Shepard asked, placing her palms on her knees and squeezing to keep from clenching her fists. She remembered how Liara's last meld had affected her, but she needed something to help her sort the mess of visions swimming around in her head. She was definitely not looking forward to living out her period of grief in a sex fog, but it had to be done. She stood and approached the middle of the room. "Okay, go ahead."

Liara stood and joined her, stepping close. "Relax Commander. Embrace Eternity!" A flash of her black eyes and Shepard fell into her visions. The images flashed by quickly and Shepard's breath caught as Liara fought to control the sexual nature of the meld. Liara was grieving too, and Shepard supposed she knew how her meld had left Shepard previously. As the images coalesced and Liara sorted through them, Shepard relaxed and allowed herself to bask in the comfort the other girl's mind provided. When the images ceased flashing and Liara backed away, Shepard breathed deeply, awaiting the feelings that had overwhelmed her before. They did not come and as she frowned, Liara spoke. "Incredible. I... I never thought the images would be so... intense. I need a moment to collect myself."

"Did the vision make any sense to you?" Shepard asked, hoping that something good had come from Virmire.

Liara nodded softly, a frown still on her face. "It's a distress call, a message sent out across the Prothean empire. A warning against the Reapers, but the warning came too late."

"What about the Conduit?" Shepard asked, wringing her hands. If Saren had seen the vision as well, he could be on his way to the Conduit as they spoke.

"There were other images. Locations. Places I recognized from my research... Ilos! The Conduit is on Ilos! That is why Saren needed to find the Mu Relay! It is the only way to get to Ilos."

"How come you never told us about Ilos before?" Shepard demanded a bit harshly, her emotions getting the better of her.

Liara answered boldly, probably realizing that Shepard was not really angry with her, but the whole situation in general. "The Mu Relay links to dozens of systems and hundreds of worlds. How was I to know Ilos was the one we wanted? Without the Cipher, the images in your visions were never clear. Only now do I recognize them as landmarks from Ilos."

Shepard turned and gazed at each of her crew. "We need to get to Ilos!"

Tali spoke up between sniffles "Forget it. The Mu Relay's inside Terminus Systems. Alliance ships are not welcome there. Neither are SPECTREs."

Shepard turned a soft smile to Tali. "The Conduit's on Ilos. That's where Saren is heading. I'll be waiting for him when he gets there!"

Liara countered her again. Was she really being this rash? "Saren will have his entire fleet orbiting Ilos. You will never make it down to the surface without reinforcements. You must alert the Council. We need a fleet to....." Liara touched her forehead and Shepard recognized the fatigue of the meld catching up with her. She stepped forward and touched a steadying hand to Liara's shoulder. "I am sorry. The joining... I need to lie down."

"Go ahead," Shepard patted her shoulder. "I think we're done for now. Dismissed."

As everyone stood to leave, Joker's voice came over the comms. He was unusually subdued as he said, "Commander, there's a comm buoy nearby. I can link us in if you want to report back to the Citadel Council. You know, to warn them about Sovereign."

"Set the link up, Joker. They need to know."

"Patching it through."

Shepard waited until everyone else had filtered out and then activated the holo projector. The three Councilors appeared before her, eerily reminding her of the silhouette of Sovereign she had conversed with on Virmire. She shuddered as the Asari councilor spoke. "Commander Shepard. I'm pleased to see your mission on Virmire was a success."

Shepard leaned on the rail in front of her, clenching her fists around the metal. How dare she call Virmire a success. The Turian councilor was the next to speak. "Saren is formidable enough without an army of Krogan serving under him."

Shepard forced her grief down and said, "Those Krogan would have served Sovereign. A Reaper."

The Salarian councilor spoke up, his voice conveying his doubts. "Yes, we saw mention of this in your report. Sovereign. A sentient machine. A true artificial intelligence. This news is quite alarming... if it turns out to be accurate."

Shepard gritted her teeth, knowing how satisfying it would be to punch the smug Salarian if he weren't a hologram. "Sovereign is a Reaper. Saren admitted it."

"He's playing you, Shepard," the Turian spat. "Saren still has contacts on the Citadel. He probably saw your earlier reports. The ones talking about your vision, and the Reapers."

The Salarian nodded his agreement and said, "It's highly possible Saren is using false information to throw you off balance. Our own intelligence had never turned up any corroborating information."

Shepard was furious. They were treating her like a child who had no idea what she was talking about. "Sooner or later, you're going to have to take something I say on faith, Councilor."

A softer voice in the crowd, the Asari said, "Try to see this from our perspective, Commander. Saren is a threat we can recognize. However, as far as we know, the Reapers only exist in your visions."

The Salarian added, "Our decisions affect trillions of lives. We cannot act on the accusations of a single person. Even a SPECTRE. Not without solid evidence."

The Asari continued. "The Council cannot take any official action here. That is why we created the SPECTREs. You have the authority to act as you see fit."

The Salarian was still nodding his agreement with the Asari when he said, "If you truly believe Sovereign is the real threat, you must take whatever steps are necessary to stop it, and Saren."

"Good luck, Commander," the Asari sighed. "From all of us."

The council disconnected the call and Shepard clenched her fists. There was no way they could get to Ilos without a fleet behind them. The Council had that fleet but they were not willing to help. Shepard stomped out of the comm room and headed for the elevator.

She paced the car as the stupid thing took its sweet time going down to the cargo bay. She needed to hit something and the only thing that she couldn't hurt was the bag. Her steps were clipped as she made her way to the work out area. She felt a short pang in her heart when she glanced over to the weapons bench where she usually saw Ashley working to pass the time. Swallowing the grief and replacing it with her growing frustration at being stonewalled she continued to the bag. Opening a nearby locker, she pulled out some wrappings for her hands and started to wrap her knuckles while cursing the council under her breath.

"Something the matter?" Garrus asked, appearing beside her.

She turned her attention to him while her fingers continued to wrap the protective cloth around her knuckles. "Well, we know where to go, we know what to do, but the Council is refusing their support." Her voice sounded angry, even to her and she forced herself to breathe before she took it out on her best friend.

Garrus hummed as he considered her words. She fumbled with her wrappings and threw her hands up in the air. He showed his amusement with a gentle spreading of his mandibles before he took her hands in his and deftly wrapped them up while she seethed. "See, this is why I came with you, Shepard. SPECTREs are supposed to be free of political red tape and bullshit. I saw it all of the time when I was with C-Sec."

"I have been through so much in my life, Garrus, but never before have I felt the strong desire to disobey an order. The Council doesn't understand. They can't. The Citadel is so far away from all of the ugliness in the universe." She clenched her fists and stepped around him toward the bag. "They sit up in their Chambers, making stupid decisions to protect themselves while we fight and lose people for the good of everyone!" She hauled off with everything she had and punched the bag, sending it flying backwards. It sprang forward toward her again and she stepped back a little. Before she could punch again, Garrus came around to steady the bag so she could hit harder and faster.

"There has to be something we can do," he said, his mandibles flicking as he thought. "You don't think the Council is protecting Saren, do you?"

"I can't even think about that," she growled, punching and beginning to work up a sweat. "Tell me a story, Garrus. I need something to take my mind off of this for a while or I swear, I will punch straight through this bag."

He looked deep in thought for a moment then he spoke, "Hmm, there was this one case I had while I was in C-Sec. I was sent to investigate a Salarian geneticist and the case went from bad to disturbing pretty quickly."

"Why were you investigating him?"

"I was tasked with tracking black market trade on the Citadel. Most of it's harmless. Nothing I needed to pursue, but during the course of my investigation, I noticed an increase in the trade of body parts. Organs, mostly."

"Gross," Shepard commented, watching his eyes becoming distant as he got into the story.

"We usually get a few of those, but not the numbers I was seeing. We weren't sure if there was a new black market lab or if some freak was harvesting organs from citizens," he continued.

"This happens often?" she asked, wondering about just how safe the Citadel really was.

"Every so often, some lab sells unwanted parts through the black market, but they're not as bad as the psychos. I remember this one Elcor diplomat we caught in my first year on the job. He was hacking people up and selling their organs. Had the station in a bit of a panic, but this case wasn't that clear cut. Turns out there was more going on than we first realized."

"So how'd you figure it out?" she asked, her interest really piqued.

"First, we got a hold of a sample and ran DNA tests. The weird thing was, the match led us to a Turian who was still alive and was very convinced he'd never lost his liver. After a bit of digging, I discovered this Turian worked briefly for Dr. Saleon, the geneticist. So I went to his lab, hoping to find evidence of cloned organ development, but there was nothing. No Salarian hearts, no Turian livers, not one Krogan testicle."

Shepard chuckled, stopping her slew of punching to look him in the eyes. "You're kidding, right? Why would anyone want Krogan testicles?"

He chuckled too. "Some Krogan believe that testicle transplants can increase their virility, counteract the effects of the genophage. It doesn't work, but that doesn't stop them from buying. They'll pay up to 10,000 credits each. That's 40,000 for a full set. Somebody's making a killing out there." There was amusement in his voice.

"So, what did you do about the geneticist?" She asked, going back to punching.

"I brought in some of his employees for interrogation to see if I could get them to talk. While I was interviewing one of them, I came across something suspicious. One of my detainees started bleeding profusely during the interview. We offered to patch him up and he got frantic, freaked out. I ordered a full exam to find out what was going on. Our medics found incisions all over his body. Some of them fresh. That was our big break. These people weren't just Dr. Saleon's employees, they were test tubes. Walking, living test tubes."

Garrus paused, his mandibles pulled tight to his face and anger in his blue eyes. Shepard frowned, pausing her workout again. "He was growing parts inside these people?"

"Exactly! He cloned their organs right inside their own bodies. Then he harvested them and sold them off. Most of the victims were poor. He'd pay them each a small percentage of the sales, but only if the organs were good. Sometimes, an organ wouldn't grow properly, so he'd just leave it in them. Most of them were a mess, but only on the inside, hidden so nobody could see it."

"I sure hope he got what he deserved," she said, completely engrossed in the story and abandoning the punching bag.

"That's the worst part. We never caught him." Garrus looked like he needed to punch the bag now as the memory of failure played over his face.

"Why not? What the hell happened?" She knew there was no way her Garrus would allow this to happen on his watch.

"He ran. Blew his lab, grabbed some of his employees, and headed for the nearest space dock. By the time I found out, his ship was already leaving. He threatened to kill his hostages if we tried to stop him."

"But you went after him anyway, right?" Shepard was engrossed.

"I ordered Citadel defense to shoot him down, but C-Sec headquarters countermanded my order. They were worried about the hostages. Worried about the civilian casualties if the ship was destroyed so close to the Citadel. I told them those hostages were dead anyway. He'd just use them to make more organs, but they wouldn't listen!"

Shepard could feel his rage mixing with hers as she agreed with him. "Hell, Garrus that sure sounds familiar. The Citadel seems like they enjoy a good stonewalling to save face."

"They sent the military after him, but he got away just the same. I went to Pallin and told him what I thought of him and his policies. He said if I didn't like it, I could quit. I almost did. All they had to do was disable that ship, stop him from running. Maybe the hostages die, maybe they don't, but at least we stop the bastard responsible for it all."

"By letting him get away, they let the hostages die. At least you might have given them a chance. Do you have any idea what happened to Dr. Saleon?"

Garrus sighed. "I sent out feelers from time to time, hoping to find something. I thought I'd found him a while back. He'd changed ships and changed his name to Dr. Heart... His idea of a joke, I guess. I told the military, but they weren't convinced it was him. I got the transponder frequency for his new ship, but I can't get anyone to check it out."

Shepard stepped around the bag and gently punched his shoulder. "Look who you're talking to, Big Guy. Send those coordinates to Joker."

"You're kidding, Shepard. What about Saren?" he was shocked. She didn't think he'd meant to pique her interest with his story and sidetrack them. She needed something to do that felt like justice. Right now, she was not going to get that anywhere else and helping Garrus get closure on something that clearly haunted him would make her feel good.

"We're stuck right now, and if I go to the Citadel to try and convince them in person, I'm fairly certain I will do to them what I was doing to this bag. You gave me something to shoot at, so give those coordinates to Joker, please." she said unraveling the wrappings from her hands, finished blowing off steam.

After a quick narrowing of his eyes as he studied her, looking to be sure she was not acting on emotion alone, he nodded. "Okay, Shepard, let's go catch this bastard."

 


	8. Broken Regs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Shepard goes rogue, it's all the way.

The Normandy's stealth drives were active as they pulled up beside the MSV Fedele. Garrus, Shepard and Liara stood in the airlock waiting to board the ship after Joker docked. When he heard the tell tale clamping sound of the ships connecting, Garrus let out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. Even if Saleon noticed them now, there was no way for him to flee. They were attached. Garrus checked his rifle one last time before the airlock whooshed open and a short tunnel led them to the airlock of the Fedele. The air of the ship smelled foul and he heard Shepard let out a slight noise of distaste, telling him that the smell was pretty bad if a human could detect it. "What is that?" she asked, wrinkling her nose as they advanced through the ship.

"Antiseptic and formaldehyde," Liara answered her, the Asari's nose wrinkling as well.

"Where is everyone?" Shepard asked, her tone wary as she checked around every corner before continuing.

"I don't like this," Garrus agreed. It was too quiet.

As they stepped through another doorway into a large room, Shepard backpedaled as the air hit her. "Ugh, that is not formaldehyde. It smells like death."

Garrus scanned the room with his visor, picking out at least a dozen decomposing corpses. "Probably the crew," he said crouching reluctantly beside one to get a closer look. Upon examination, they body did not carry the same incisions he'd seen back on the citadel, but it looked as if it had been ripped apart, savagely by something. "We need to stop whatever happened here from spreading," he said, getting back to his feet and looking to Shepard who had a hand over her nose and mouth while she examined another of the bodies.

Liara remained in the doorway, unwilling to examine the bodies and reluctant to follow as they stepped through the room, avoiding the bodies that were strewn everywhere. Another door across the room led to a hallway that ended in another closed door. Shepard was taking shallow breaths as she fiddled with her omnitool to get the door open. When it finally opened, she was immediately set upon by a shrieking naked creature that threw itself at her and like the husk on Virmire, attempted to bite her. Garrus took the head shot before it could do so, dropping it to the floor. There were several more of the same type of creature that attacked them in the room. They took them down quickly with head shots, as the things had no clothing, armor, or barriers to protect them. "What the hell!?" Shepard shouted after the last one fell. She shuddered, wiping brain matter off her chest piece and glancing around to be certain there were no more. You could tell that each of the creatures used to be a person of one race or another, but at this point whatever experiments they'd been subjected to had crossed the line and made them into barely alive, walking bits of flesh, bone and too many organs. Some of the creatures' chest and abdomens were nearly ripping apart at the seams where they'd been sewn up again and again in an effort to retrieve whatever specimens had been grown.

Garrus felt rage like he had never felt before. Saleon had to be eliminated. This was monstrous. All of these people died because he was greedy. "Saleon. It has to be. These people are filled to bursting with extra organs," he growled.

Shepard jogged up next to him. "It's okay, Big Guy," she soothed, her hand touching his arm. He knew he couldn't hide the rumbling of his subvocals from her so he simply shrugged her hand away and moved through the room.

She was right behind him as they passed through to another hallway that split in three. He could not smell anyone to the left or straight ahead on the bridge, so he turned right and attempted to hack the lock on the door. He growled in frustration before allowing Shepard to calmly open the door. She stood as his rock. He stared at her back as she typed the proper codes into her omnitool with practiced serenity in the heat of the moment. In those few moments, he allowed her Command and her presence to settle his rage. He took breaths as deep as the smell of decay would allow, and slowed his racing heart. The door finally clicked open and he was ready. Shepard stepped in beside him, her pistol pointed at the lone target in the room. He would recognize that Salarian anywhere.

"Thank you! Thank you for saving me from those things!" the doctor sputtered, obviously not realizing they were not there to help him.

"Commander, that's him. That's Dr. Saleon," Garrus growled, letting Shepard know they had the right target.

"What?! My name is Heart! Dr. Heart. Please, get me out of here." The doctor squirmed as the weapons they had pointed were not lowered.

"Are you _sure_ it's him?" Shepard asked, barely an inflection in her tone and her eyes never leaving the target.

"Positive! There's no escape this time, Doctor. I'd harvest _your_ organs first, but we don't have the time!"

Saleon made a last ditch effort to lie, "You're crazy! He's crazy! Please, don't let him do this to me!"

"Put him out of his misery so we can get going. This place smells terrible," Shepard said, lifting her pistol to the sky and stepping aside.

"Gladly," Garrus eyes narrowed as he lined up the shot to the head. "Your days of butchering are over, _doctor_." Before Saleon could even turn to run, Garrus took the shot. It exploded the doctor's head at such close range and Garrus let out a grunt. "That was... satisfying."

"Good," Shepard turned to him and smiled. "Remember that feeling. That's how it should be. No one else will die because of this waste of skin."

"Oh, I will, Shepard... Well, I guess we're done here."

Shepard nodded and they picked their way quickly back to the Normandy.

* * *

 

Taking Garrus to kill Saleon had not only settled something in his life that was bothering him, but it had made her feel good to bring home a win after the disaster that was Virmire. She immediately made her way to her shower to wash the smell of the MSV Fedele from her skin. Once she was dressed in her civvies, she wanted to go have a talk with Garrus to be certain he was feeling better. She knew what getting closure sometimes felt like, and it wasn't always pleasant. After sending a message to the Alliance to get a team to clean out the Fedele and try to identify the dead that were littered all over the ship, she left her cabin. Before she could make it to the elevator to go down and see Garrus, Kaidan stopped her with a short clearing of his throat. She allowed him to approach, shoving her hands in her hoodie pocket. "Hey, Kaidan, what's up?"

"How'd the mission go?" he asked, clearly skirting whatever he was really interested in getting out of her.

She shrugged. "Gruesome, but we did what needed doing."

"So, Garrus is alright?" he hinted.

"I was just about to go find out," she threw a thumb over her shoulder toward the elevator.

"You know, Shepard, I'm not certain how to read you sometimes," he admitted, apparently growing as tired of the dance around the subject as she was.

"How do you mean?" she asked, wondering if her flirting was not being taken as intended.

He ran fingers through his hair and she bit her lip, finding herself wishing she could run _her_ fingers through his hair. "It's just, you talk one way and act another, and I guess I'm just looking for a straight answer. I saw Garrus coming from your room the other morning, then you run off and do this _huge_ favor for him... I suppose I want to know if something happened between you two."

She took a step toward him, stopping short of touching his face to reassure him because after all they were standing in the middle of the mess hall. "Garrus helped me sleep the other night when I was messed up about Ash's death. Honestly, I feel like it should have been you, Kaidan, but he was there and you were getting sewn back up in the med bay. It was harmless."

He studied her face, his brown eyes intense as he decided whether she was being truthful. "Okay," he said finally, stepping back. "I know you're going to want to check on him. Sorry I interrupted."

"Are we okay?" she asked, allowing herself to at least squeeze his bicep to give him something.

"We're good, Shepard. Promise," he said, as she allowed her hand to slide down his arm, pulling it away just before she was tempted to grab his hand.

* * *

 

After Shepard had her talk with Garrus, she received a message from Ambassador Udina. She needed to read it three times before she believed it was real. She ran up to the Galaxy map as quickly as she could, ignoring everyone she nearly ran over as she did so. "Joker! Get us to the Citadel, ASAP! The Council finally pulled their heads out of their asses and promised us back up. I want the Normandy at the head of that fleet!"

"Aye, Commander," she heard just as she felt the inertia dampeners kick in and Joker jumped to FTL. Finally, something was going to get done.

* * *

 

Docking with the Citadel was no less impressive this time around as it had been the last time. The council had arranged for them to meet with them as soon as the Normandy arrived. Shepard geared up and chose to take Kaidan and Garrus with her. They quickly made their way to the council chambers, to get started. Udina greeted her as warmly as he was able, she guessed. "Good job, Shepard. Thanks to you, the Council's finally taking real action against, Saren!"

The Asari councilor stepped forward to speak. "The Ambassador is correct. If Saren is indeed foolish enough to attack the Citadel, as you believe, we will be ready for him."

"Patrols are stationed at every mass relay linking Citadel Space to the Terminus systems," the Turian added smugly.

Shepard's heart dropped as she realized she wasn't getting what she had thought when she'd read the messages from Udina. "You think a blockade's going to stop him? He's on Ilos looking for the Conduit right now! What are you doing about that?"

The Salarian councilor sighed as if he were going to explain a simple truth to a child. "Ilos is only accessible through the Mu Relay, deep inside the Terminus Systems, Commander. If we send a fleet in there, the only possible outcome is full-scale war."

Before she could protest again, Udina turned to her and sneered. "Now is the time for discretion, Commander. Saren's greatest weapon was secrecy. Exposed, he is no longer a threat. This is over."

She gave her full attention to Udina's idiotic political response and snarled, "If Saren finds the Conduit, we're all screwed! We have to go to Ilos!"

The Turian councilor spoke again. "Ambassador Udina, I get the sense Commander Shepard isn't willing to let this go."

"There are serious political ramifications here, Shepard. Humanity's made great gains thanks to you, but now you're becoming more trouble than you're worth," Udina scolded.

"You bastard!" Kaidan shouted at Udina, surprising Shepard. "You're selling us out!"

Udina stepped away out of the range of any of their fists, locking his hands behind his back and said, "It's just politics, Commander. You've done your job, now let me do mine. We've locked out all the Normandy's primary systems. Until further notice, you're grounded."

Shepard nearly stumbled as the news hit her like a physical blow. Everything she had done and sacrificed was going to be in vain. "Are you insane? After everything I've done, you still don't believe me?"

"I think it's time for you and your team to leave, Commander. This no longer concerns you. The council can handle this. With my help, of course." Udina turned his back on her and faced the council, a clear dismissal.

She ground her teeth and clenched her fists, spinning on her heel before she punched the man. Neither Garrus nor Kaidan dared speak to her as they made their way back to the Normandy. Nothing she could think to do was going to do any good. They were grounded. By the time the politicians figured things out, Saren would be at their front door with Sovereign and all his friends. She removed her armor and found herself pacing. With nothing better to do, she stalked out of her cabin, through the mess where most of the crew was sitting around eating lunch, and took the elevator down to the cargo bay and Ashley's locker. She had not found the right time to clear out Ash's personal things, feeling sick to her stomach every time she even thought about it. Now though, it seemed right to keep her hands busy. The cargo bay was deserted as she crossed it to the locker on the end. Kneeling in front of it, she realized she hadn't retrieved the combination to the lock. Deciding to simply occupy her mind by hacking the code, she set to work.

She never even heard Kaidan approach as she grew frustrated with the lock that wouldn't budge. When he stepped into her peripheral, she turned to glance at him and closed her omni tool interface before sitting and slamming her back into the locker with a frustrated grunt. "Commander, are you alright? I'm sure there's a way to appeal. We're under Alliance authority after all, not the Council."

"I pushed as hard as I could, they wouldn't listen!" She craned her neck to look up at him.

"So that's it? We just walk away? Let them win and damn us all?" he argued.

"We'll think of something!" she insisted, unsure of what that something might be. She lowered her voice, trying not to heap her frustrations on him. "I just need to figure things out."

"If I can be of any help, let me know. I hope I'm not out of line saying that," he offered.

She snorted softly. "You always this cautious with a sure thing?"

He gave a soft chuckle of his own. "Yeah, well, I always leave a way out, you know that. I'm here for you, but we're in a rough spot and the last thing I wanna do is muddy things." He paused and continued as if his next phrase was a side thought. "Like it's all that clear to start with... Are we the pride of the fleet or not? Are we valued agents or just peons?"

"You can't just pull out a good old fashioned 'it'll be alright', can you?" she asked jokingly.

"It's that easy, huh? Okay then," he grinned. "Everything will be fine, Shepard. You'll figure it out."

"If you get me to melt now, when will I figure out how to save the galaxy?" she teased, making his cheeks flush.

"Oh hoho, so It's back to business after playing me? You're something else, you know?"

He reached his hand down to help her up off the floor, a grin plastered from ear to ear after the exchange of banter. She took his hand and butterflies swooped through her gut as he pulled her up straight into his arms. No one was around to see as they gazed at each other. Her heart raced and she leaned in close, offering her lips to his. Just as they were close enough to take the plunge, his breath warm on her lips, Joker's voice echoed around the empty cargo bay. She jumped back and a pained expression creased Kaidan's features. She grinned at him, promising with her eyes that they would continue later. "Sorry to interrupt, Commander. Got a message from Captain Anderson."

"Are you spying on us, Joker?" she asked, teasingly while Kaidan rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

"No, ma'am, just knew you were on the ship and figured I'd pass the message on." Joker's voice was laced with sarcasm. "The Captain said to meet him at Flux, that club down on the wards."

"Well, I guess you'd better go then," Kaidan said, giving her one last once over with his eyes and reaching to touch her arm.

She nodded, giving him a tight lipped smile and rushing off to get changed.

* * *

 

Not wishing to draw attention to herself, Shepard went alone to Flux in her civvies with her pistol hidden in her waistband. The club was loud, the combination of the music, the people, and the Quasar machines drowning out just about everything else. She spotted Anderson easily enough, which was strange because she had never seen him out of his dress blues. He wore a t shirt and jeans and was sipping on a beer when she joined him at his table.

"I'm glad you came, Shepard. I heard what happened." He was sympathetic as usual.

"They pulled me off the mission, just like when they forced you to give up the Normandy," she said, waving for a beer to the waitress moving through the tables.

"I know, I'm sorry. I wanted to warn you, but there was no way to get a message to you before you docked. I know you're pissed off right now, but you can't give up." The waitress dropped off her beer and she sipped at it while Anderson continued. "They all think this is over, but we both know it's not. You have to go to Ilos. You have to stop Saren from using the Conduit!"

She sighed. "There's only one ship that can get me into the Terminus Systems undetected, and she's grounded."

"Citadel controls locked out all the Normandy's systems, but if we override the ambassador's orders, we can get them to bring the Normandy back online. You can be in the Terminus Systems before anyone even knows you're gone," he said with a grin, tipping the rim of his beer toward her.

"If we steal the Normandy, you're the one left holding the bag," she said, a small shake of her head conveying her dislike for his plan before she sipped her beer again.

"And if Saren finds the conduit, life as we know it is over. The Reapers will destroy us. Humans, Asari, everybody! You're the only one who can stop him, Shepard. So I'll do whatever it takes to get you on the Normandy and off this station."

She thought for a moment, concern for his well-being weighing heavily on her. She thought of Anderson more like a friend than a superior officer, but she needed his help. "I won't forget this, Captain. I promise."

He sat forward smiling at her acceptance. "I can unlock the Normandy from one of the consoles in the Citadel control center. You'll have a few minutes before anyone realizes what's happened."

"Won't you run into resistance? I doubt they'll let you just walk in."

"Leave that to me. Just make sure you're in the Normandy when the systems come back on-line." he insisted.

"You're gonna get yourself killed. There has to be another way," she suggested, prodding him to think before leaping into insanity for her sake.

He paused then offered her another plan. "Ambassador Udina issued the lock-down order. If I can hack into the computer in his office, maybe I can override it. Hopefully he won't be there, but if he is, I'll just have to think of something."

"That's treason if Udina has anything to say about it later," she was starting to think this was not going to work.

"We don't have a lot of options. I break into the ambassador's computer, or I take my chances with the patrols in Citadel control," he crossed his arms, leaving her only those two options.

She sighed and stood, leaving half her beer behind. Tossing a credit chit on the table she said, "You'll have a better chance if you go after the Ambassador's computer."

A sly grin crossed his face. "I was hoping you'd say that. The Ambassador has made this personal. You ready to get the hell off this station, Commander?"

"Let's do it." She shook his hand and hurried off back to the Normandy as fast as she could.

Once she passed through decontamination, she rushed to Joker's side. In spite of the lock-down, he was still in his pilot's seat on the bridge. "Hey, Commander. What did the Captain want?"

"Joker, be ready. Anderson is going to get the lock-down lifted," she informed him. They waited with baited breath, staring at the console with the docking release button locked in the red. She was just starting to have her doubts when the button flashed green. With a gentle pat to his shoulder, she said. "Get us the hell off this station."

"Aye, Commander," he said hitting the release and his arms and fingers moved furiously across the screens as he backed them away from the docking bay and headed out past the arms of the Citadel and to freedom.

She turned and left the bridge, trusting him to get them where they needed to be. A sigh of relief washed over her as the feeling of being caged slipped away the further they got from the Citadel. Getting to Ilos would take some time and she decided to spend it making sure she was prepared to show down against Saren. They had clashed before and it had not gone well for her or her team.

She found herself in her cabin, pouring over research on cybernetic upgrades and biotics when her door whooshed open. She turned to see Kaidan standing in her room, and subtly locking the door behind him. "Commander."

"You probably shouldn't call me that," she sighed, feeling like even though they were on the path to Saren and Ilos, that she had been complicit in some punishable things to get there. "Probably shouldn't even be wearing this." She plucked at the N7 patch that had been sewn to her hoodie.

"Yeah, hell of a thing," he mused. "Broke our oath to defend the Alliance so we can keep it. What happens if this doesn't work out Shepard? I mean, we mutinied, stole a prototype warship, if they wanted to get technical they could throw in kidnapping. We're a hell of an example of humanity's best and brightest, huh?"

"I keep reminding myself we're doing the right thing. I don't believe me yet." She crossed her arms, looking away from his scrutiny.

"Well if I didn't think you were doing the right thing, I wouldn't be here. It'll really hit the fan when we get to Ilos. If things don't go well, I want you to know, well... I have enjoyed serving under you." He stepped closer, touching her arm. She shuddered.

"Kaidan, you stopped being a subordinate a long time ago. Don't you think it's time to act like it?" she purred, leaning into his space.

"Battlefield flirting is one thing, Shepard. There are regs against fraternization." He chuckled at himself. "I suppose breach of protocol will be pretty far down the list of charges at our court marshal." He paused again and took her hands, prying them from where she had tucked them under her arms. "You know what, you're right, about everything. I think about loosing you and I can't stand it. The galaxy will just keep going. Everything, even the Reapers will come around again, but you and I... we... are important right now. This is what will never happen again. Us. Shepard, you make me feel," he paused to sigh. "human."

She pulled one of her hands from his and touched his face. "Bunk here tonight, Kaidan, with me."

He cracked a sideways smirk and her heart melted. "Is that an order, Commander?"

"I'm not looking for a pet, Kaidan. I could have gone elsewhere for that," she said, thinking of the way Liara had been subtly dropping hints that she was interested in Shepard.

"I'm glad you didn't." He smiled again, but it was replaced with a serious look. "This can't change anything, Shepard. This is a good crew, the finest I've served with. I don't wanna mess it up."

She nodded her agreement, but all of his talk was starting to drive her just a little bit crazy. She took both her hands and grabbed his neck, pulling his lips to her. As soon as their lips met, electricity sparked. The kiss had been a long time coming and the release was much needed. A lot of her pent up, after battle energy had been itching to get loose. Kaidan had been giving her a lot to imagine as she stared at him while he worked at his station for months. She gasped as he wrapped his arms around her, bending to kiss her neck and pressing their bodies together. She tightened her arms around his neck and hopped into his arms. He caught her, a husky chuckle escaping his throat and his fingers gripping her ass cheeks. She pushed against him with her hips as she nibbled his ear lobe, coaxing him toward the bed. His heels hit the bed frame and he fell backwards, her landing on all fours above him. Now that he didn't have to support her, his hands roved her body, slowly finding their way under her clothes to help slip them off. She made short work of his uniform as well while they engaged in heavy petting.

She pushed off the bed, standing and pulling his pants with her as her own bottoms fell with gravity. He took her in, grinning as he backed up toward the head of the bed and she climbed up to crawl back to his mouth. With him still leaning on his elbows, their lips met again as she grazed herself over him, making him press his mouth tighter to hers. He gave up his leverage to quickly grab and squeeze her breasts before wrapping his arms around her and flipping them so he was on top. She gave over command, allowing him to gently move up and down, rubbing against her opening and sliding his tongue down her neck, over her clavicle and stopping to tease over her nipple. She arched her back at his attention, moaning. He looked up at her, a glint in his eye that she was excited to see. Kaidan needed this as much as she did. He was very serious most of the time and the best way to unwind was to take advantage of months of unrequited flirting.

He graced her with a devious grin before his tongue found its way down to her inner thighs. She gasped and gripped the top of the mattress above her head, never wanting a head board as much as she did just then, when he flicked his tongue just over a sweet spot at her opening. As he worked his magic, her breathing came faster, building her into a frenzy. She reached down with her free hand not gripping the bed and tangled her fingers in the hair she had found so fascinating the other day. She tugged gently, letting him know she was ready to let him come up for air. Her hand stayed in his hair as he took her hint immediately, catering to her. He nuzzled her neck briefly before plunging himself inside where his tongue had just been. She gasped again as he slid over that spot again, making her whole body tingle. She turned her head, lifting his from her neck and kissed him deeply. He complied, letting her taste herself on his lips as their tongues mingled.

The pressure built between them as he slowly caressed her insides. Kaidan was the most attentive lover she could ever remember having. He subtly made sure she was with him the entire time, taking her silent cues like he did on the battlefield. His final thrust brought her, forcing her to bite down on his neck to keep from screaming her pleasure. Her nails raked down his back and he released a pleased moan of his own with the added stimuli. He remained propped on his elbows, dropping his head to breathe heavily onto her neck, raising goose flesh on her skin and hardening her nipples. "God, Kaidan," she breathed, as stress melted away with the waves of her orgasm that were slowly fading.

He slowly pulled out of her, making her writhe again as he laid a gentle kiss on her neck at the sweet spot just below her ear. "You are amazing, Shepard," he whispered, tracing kisses down her shoulder as he laid down beside her.

He placed his palm over her stomach and caressed over her skin, pulling her closer to press his body against hers. His lips continued their gentle attention as she rolled to face her back to him and huddle into his warmth. That was where she fell asleep.

* * *

 

When she woke, Kaidan had migrated to his back and was snoring softly. She got up from the bed and padded to the bathroom for a quick shower. She wasn't certain how long they had slept, but they had to be nearing Ilos. As much as she hated the thought, they would need to get back to reality. Saren still needed to be stopped. After her shower, she dressed and instead of waking Kaidan, she took a moment to enjoy the contented look on his face. It was an expression she didn't see often. She was leaning on her desk and watching him when he stirred, reaching a hand over to her side of the bed. Feeling her gone, he sat up and when she smiled at him, he returned the expression, relaxing back onto his elbow. "It's been a long time since I met a woman that..."

His words were cut off by the irritating sound of Joker's voice over the comms, "Bridge to Commander Shepard, we're five minutes out from the Mu Relay."

After frowning at the comm speaker, she returned her attention to Kaidan, her features softening. "You're a sweetheart, Kaidan."

He smiled, letting her know he knew she wanted to say more. "Joker's waiting for you on the bridge. I swear though, if anything happens to you... Take care Shepard."

She pushed away from the desk and leaned over him to give him a short chaste kiss before heading out to get caught up on their status.

* * *

 

Once Shepard made it up to the bridge, it was crowded with the rest of her team. They passed through the Mu Relay and came out nearly on top of Ilos. As the Normandy drifted toward the red-brown planet, Garrus stepped over to stand beside her. He leaned over and whispered to her. "You and Kaidan finally made good on all of that flirting, huh?"

Her attention snapped to him her eyes widening and her face flushed. "How did you...?"

He chuckled softly, "You stink like pheromones and Kaidan underneath your shampoo."

"Oh, God," she groaned, burying her face in her palms as Kaidan stepped onto the bridge to join them, his hair wet from the quick shower he must have grabbed in her bathroom before rushing to get there so quickly.

She was spared further embarrassment when Joker said, "Uh, Commander? We've got company."

She glanced out the windows and spotted the geth ships that were surrounding the planet. "Have their sensors picked us up yet?" Liara asked, almost frantic.

Joker shook his head. "Stealth systems _are_ engaged. Unless we get close enough for a visual, they won't have any idea we're here."

Navigator Pressley spoke up from his station. "Picking up on some strange readings from the planet's surface."

"Take us down, Joker. Lock in on the coordinates," she ordered, ready to go get her gear on.

"Negative on that, Commander. The nearest landing zone's two clicks away," Pressley protested.

"We'll never make it in time on foot. Get us something closer!" Kaidan said.

"There _is_ nowhere closer! I've looked," Pressley's voice conveyed he was insulted that Kaidan had assumed he didn't do his job properly.

"Drop us in the Mako," Shepard stepped forward and suggested, crossing her arms with a shrug.

Pressley scoffed. "You need at least a hundred meters of open terrain to pull off a drop like that. The most I can find near Saren is twenty."

"Twenty meters?! We'll never get in close enough for a drop," the defeat in Kaidan's voice made her angry. There had to be another way. She was not going to be stopped at the door over 80 meters.

"We have to try," Liara said with confidence, mirroring Shepard's determination.

Kaidan waved his hand, shaking his head. "Find another landing zone."

"There is no other landing zone!" Pressley all but shouted.

"The descent angle's too steep," Tali added.

Liara would not be waved aside. "It's our only option."

Kaidan threw his hands in the air, "It's _not_ an option, it's a suicide run! We don't..."

"I can do it." Joker's voice was calm and even over the din of everyone else's shouting.

"Joker?" Shepard stepped up beside him, hope and confidence in her pilot letting her believe.

"I can do it," he repeated, just as calmly. When Joker was being serious, Shepard had learned to listen.

Needing no more convincing, Shepard looked from Kaidan to Garrus and nodded to each. "Gear up and head down to the Mako. Joker... Drop us right on top of that bastard!"

She jogged from the bridge to go to her cabin and get her gear. With the speed of routine, she snapped her armor in place and checked her weapons. Satisfied, she headed to the elevator and down to the Mako. The others were all in the cargo bay waiting when she arrived, Kaidan and Garrus finishing up some final touches on their armor. She checked her clasps one last time then checked her omnitool for the atmo readings on Ilos. "At least the air is breathable," Kaidan sidled up next to her, reading over her shoulder.

She nodded. "It will make it easier without helmets. Garrus, please tell me the Mako is in the best shape she's ever been in, and the brakes will stop us on a dime." She shot him a lopsided half grin and his mandibles spread in response.

"Remember Shepard, the Mako only stops when you put your boot on the brakes."

"You're still doubting my driving skills, Vakarian?" she tsked.

His subvocals rumbled. "Skills is certainly not the word I would have chosen."

"That's it, you're on half rations when we get back," she nudged him with her elbow, grinning.

"Hard ass," he mumbled, popping open the hatch to the Mako and they climbed in.

"Oh, now it's quarter rations," she quipped. She opened her comm channel to the bridge. "We're ready Joker, let's hope your aim is better than Garrus'."

Garrus harrumphed at her jab and buckled his seat belt. "You better hope it's as good as mine."

The hatch on the Normandy ground open with the familiar sound of the hydraulics and Shepard took a deep breath. This was either a really great idea that would save the galaxy, or a ridiculously terrible one that would kill them all. She prayed for the former as Joker shouted for her to go and she jammed her boot down on the gas. The Mako shot like a rocket out of the Normandy and began to fall toward Ilos. Shepard left her stomach back on the ship and she felt nauseous for the first time ever while performing this maneuver. There was no margin for error on her part. She saw the ground careening toward them and spotted their 20 meter landing zone. She allowed herself a short sigh as the Mako seemed to be heading straight for the open area. She squinted, flicking on her visor interface to get a reading on the activity she was seeing on the ground. She spotted a slew of geth and Saren was with them. They were all heading for an underground tunnel straight ahead. "Holy Toledo!" She grinned. "The LZ just got larger! Look at that bunker! Oh, shit!" She noticed Saren begin to herd the geth faster as he saw them dropping toward him.

Saren passed under an overhang into the tunnel and as soon as he disappeared, the opening slammed shut. "So much for a larger LZ," Kaidan groaned as they came within a quarter mile of slamming down. He braced his palm on the dash in front of him.

She gripped the wheel and held it as steady as she could manage. "Hold on to your butts!" The Mako slammed down on the ground, the wheels gripped the soil and it shot forward. Shepard's heart was in her throat as the large metal door that Saren had closed moments ago sped towards them. She took both feet and pushed them both down on the brake pedal, letting out a frightened whimper, that she would regret later if they survived, and closed her eyes. The tires squealed loudly as the Mako fought to stop its momentum from the drop out of the Normandy in a fifth of it's usual allotted space. In the span of a few breaths, she felt her body fight the seat belt while they careened to a stop. When the inevitable crash didn't come, she opened her eyes and saw they had stopped a mere three inches from the door. Her breath whooshed out and a hysterical laugh followed it. She swallowed her heart back down and turned to her team. "Everyone in one piece?"

Both Kaidan and Garrus nodded, the same level of disbelief marking their faces as she felt in her still racing heart and shaking hands. "We need to get that door open," Garrus pointed out after a few short breaths.

She nodded and opened the hatch to get out of the Mako. "Be ready. I'm sure Saren won't make this easy on us."

Ilos reminded her of the vids she'd watched as a kid about rain forests. The air was sticky and damp and there was plant life growing everywhere. Strange statues both broken and intact littered the landscape. Shepard felt almost bad for not bringing Liara with them, but this was a high risk mission, not a field trip. There would be time later if they stopped Saren. They pushed along the overgrown path, behind the Mako. As they crested a slight incline, Shepard's shields were clipped by a bullet. "Geth!" Garrus shouted, grabbing her and pulling her behind the moss laden pillar he was hiding behind. She spared a glance to be sure Kaidan was alright before peeking around the pillar to get a flashlight count.

They tore through the geth as they usually did, even taking down an armature before they could continue. The structure they were moving through was like a maze to discover where they needed to be to shut down the security for the ancient technology. Shepard found some geth technology beside some inactive Colossus models and tinkered with it briefly to be certain the inactive geth wouldn't wake up to impede them later. As they approached what looked like a command center, they were faced with a geth Prime and some smaller troopers. Shepard laid waste to the Prime's shields with her overload and Kaidan tossed the troopers all over the place with his biotics. After the Prime was disabled, Garrus took it out with a shot straight in it's flashlight face. Geth were no longer a challenge, since they had discovered all of their weaknesses. Shepard sighed, wishing for a bit more action. "Slow down, Big Guy! You're making our jobs look easy," she taunted as Garrus peppered a few troopers with his assault rifle.

"Do you _want_ Saren to get to the Conduit first? Because I can just stop shooting," he threatened, a grin on his face as he briefly lifted his gun and stopped his assault.

"Is this really the time for banter?" Kaidan asked, his face pinched.

Shepard realized they should probably let him back off so his biotics didn't short out. "Don't fry your circuits, Kaidan. We got the last few," she assured him, her pistol taking out three geth in succession like it was nothing. She heard Garrus clear his throat but she couldn't tell if he was impressed with her marksmanship or if he was laughing.

They finally got past the blockade and into the security station. There was a console at the top of a short elevator ride, that looked ancient and over used. She passed her fingers through the interface and the computer began to speak while she hacked the security. The VI was badly damaged but Shepard heard what remained of a warning. She frowned, trying to make out more. "It sounds like some kind of message, but I don't recognize the language," Garrus said, shaking his head.

"It's probably in Prothean," Kaidan suggested. "This place is ancient, the VI is probably just as old."

"The message is all broken up, but I recognize some of the words. It's a warning against the Reaper Invasion," Shepard translated, uncertain why she could understand it when they couldn't.

"Whoa," Kaidan said. "The cipher must be what's allowing you to understand the language."

The message was still cycling and Shepard briefly returned her attention to the fragmented voice before Garrus asked, "What's it saying? Can you make out anything useful?"

Shepard strained to understand, but there was a lot of static and the damage was effecting the clarity. "It said something about the Conduit, but it's too degraded to help. We should go." She ran her fingers through the interface again before turning away as the phrase 'cannot be stopped' began to repeat over and over.

She shuddered as they made their way back to the door where the Mako had dropped. The way back was much shorter as they found an elevator had been unlocked with the security override. "So who votes we take the tank into the creepy underground bunker?" Kaidan asked as they saw the door opened up into a long tunnel that was way more than wide enough to accommodate the Mako.

They piled into the Mako and Shepard gunned it into the tunnel. As she drove in the silence of the tunnel, Garrus' subvocals hummed as he said, "I thought Saren would have set some kind of trap or an ambush for us. He must have been in too much of a hurry."

"Yeah, or we just haven't run into it yet," Shepard agreed. "There's still a lot of tunnel to go." The tunnel dipped and rose a few times, but there was no end in sight. The walls were lined with strange structures, jutting out from hundreds of plugs.

"What are all those things on the wall?" Garrus asked, almost reading her mind. "Some kind of containers?"

Shepard squinted at them as they raced past. "They almost look like stasis pods," Kaidan suggested. Shepard diverted her attention back to the road when the Mako's shields took a hit.

"There's our ambush," she commented as she ran over two or three geth and continued on.

"That was hardly and ambush, Shepard. More like stragglers that got left behind," Garrus quipped, earning him a grin from her that was quickly wiped off her face as they approached a shimmering barrier blocking the entire tunnel from top to bottom.

"And there's the trap," she said, slowing the Mako and approaching cautiously. When they had come to a stop, she looked around, scanning with her visor for any sign of life. A nod from Garrus confirmed there was nothing.

She sprung the hatch and hopped out of the Mako. There was a door off to their right and she headed toward it, drawing her pistol. "I don't think Saren is behind this," Kaidan said, approaching at her 8.

"It's an elevator," she said, unable to hide the surprise in her voice as she stepped in to the enclosed space and spotted the active button. "Let's see where it leads."

As they rode down, Garrus' mandibles were twitching and Kaidan spoke in the silence to reassure himself. "If this was Saren he would have sprung his trap by now. What is happening here?"

"Whatever it is, Shepard, we should be careful," Garrus warned.

The elevator opened into a short, dead end hallway with an active VI interface glowing at the end. As Shepard approached, the VI spoke. "You are not Prothean, but you are not machine either. This eventuality was one of many that was anticipated. This is why we sent our warning through the beacons."

"Looks like some kind of VI program, " Garrus stepped closer as the readings on his visor zipped by wildly. "Pretty badly damaged."

"I do not sense the taint of indoctrination upon any of you, unlike the other that passed recently. Perhaps there is still hope." The VI spoke again.

"Uh, Shepard, I can understand this one," Kaidan said. "It's not speaking Prothean."

"I have been monitoring your communications since you arrived at this facility. I have translated my output into a form of communication you will comprehend. My name is Vigil. You are safe here for the moment, but that is likely to change. Soon, nowhere will be safe." The VI answered for itself.

"Why did you bring me here?" Shepard asked, feeling Saren getting closer to the conduit while she spoke to a 50,000 year old broken VI.

"You must break a cycle that has continued for millions of years, but to stop it, you must understand, or you will make the same mistakes we did. The Citadel is the heart of your civilization and the seat of government, as it was with us and as it has been with every civilization that came before us. But the Citadel is a trap. The station is actually an enormous mass relay. One that links to dark space, an empty void beyond the galaxy's horizon. When the Citadel relay is activated, the Reapers will pour through and all you know will be destroyed."

Shepard felt her blood run cold. "The Reapers can wipe out the council and the entire Citadel fleet in a single surprise attack!"

"That was our fate. Our leaders were dead before we even realized we were under attack. The Reapers seized control of the Citadel and through it, the mass relays. Communication and transportation across our empire were crippled. Each star system was isolated, cut off from the others, easy prey for the Reaper Fleets. Over the next decades, the Reapers systematically obliterated our people. World by world, system by system, they methodically wiped us out."

"Some of you must have managed to survive," Shepard insisted. Proof was standing before her in the form of the ancient VI.

"Through the Citadel, the Reapers had access to all our records, maps, census data. Information is power and they knew everything about us. Their fleets advanced across every settled region in the galaxy. Some worlds were utterly destroyed, others were conquered, their populations enslaved. These indoctrinated servants became sleeper agents under Reaper control, taken in as refugees by other Protheans. They betrayed them to the machines. Within a few centuries the Reapers had enslaved or killed every Prothean in the galaxy. They were relentless, brutal, and absolutely thorough."

"You said you brought me here for a reason. Tell me what I need to do," Shepard was done talking. She wanted to get on with stopping Saren. He had gained a lot of ground while she listened to Vigil ramble.

"The Conduit is the key. Before the Reapers attacked, we Protheans were on the cusp of unlocking the mysteries behind mass relay technology. Ilos was a top secret facility. Here, researchers were to create a small scale version of a mass relay, one that linked directly to the Citadel, the heart of the relay network."

"The Conduit's not a weapon," Garrus said excitedly. "Its a backdoor onto the Citadel!"

"What happened next?" Shepard pushed, looking for a solution.

"We severed all communication with the outside, and our facility went dark. The personnel retreated underground into these archives. To conserve resources, everyone was put into cryogenic stasis. I was programmed to monitor the facility and wake the staff when the danger had passed, but the genocide of an entire species is a long, slow process. Years passed, decades, centuries, the Reapers persisted, and my energy reserves were dwindling."

"You should have fought!" Shepard growled, seeing where this conversation was headed.

"We were a few hundred against a galactic invasion fleet. Our only hope was to remain undetected. I began to disable the life support of non-essential personnel. First support staff then security. One by one, their pods were shut down to conserve energy. Eventually, only the stasis pods of the top scientists remained active. Even these were in danger of failing when the Reapers finally retreated back through the Citadel Relay."

"There were hundreds of stasis pods out there," Kaidan choked out, his anger bringing his biotics to the surface.

"You were programmed to protect them!" Shepard agreed. "Not kill them!"

"This outcome was not completely unforeseen. My actions were a result of contingency programming entered upon my creation."

"I bet they didn't tell the 'nonessential' staff about this contingency," Garrus pointed out, crossing his arms.

"I saved key personnel. When the Reapers retreated, the dormant researchers were still alive. My actions were the only reason any hope remains. When the researchers awoke they realized the Prothean species was doomed. There were only a dozen individuals left, far too few to sustain a viable population, yet they vowed to find some way to stop the Reapers from returning, a way to break the cycle forever, and they knew the Keepers were the key."

"Aren't they under the influence of the Reapers?" Shepard asked, remembering the strange creatures that appeared in the background of everything on the Citadel. They were supposed to be in charge of maintenance, but they ignored all orders and would self destruct if someone got too near. If they came as part of the Citadel and the Reapers built the Citadel, they must be Reaper toys, right?

"The Keepers are controlled by the Citadel. Before each invasion, a signal is sent through the station, compelling the Keepers to activate the Citadel Relay. After decades of feverish study, the scientists discovered a way to alter this signal. Using the Conduit, they gained access to the Citadel and made the modifications. This time, when Sovereign sent the signal to the Citadel, the Keepers ignored it. The Reapers are trapped in dark space."

A light bulb went on in Shepard's head. "Saren can use the Conduit to bypass all of the Citadel's external defenses!"

"Correct, and once inside, he can transfer control of the station to Sovereign. Sovereign will override the Citadel's systems and manually open the relay, and the cycle of extinction will begin again."

"Is there any way we can stop him?" Shepard asked, nearing panic mode and wondering why they were still standing around. Had he reached the Conduit already while they dallied?

"There's a data file in my console. Take a copy when you go. When you reach the Citadel's master control unit, upload it to the station. It will corrupt the Citadel's security protocols and give you temporary control of the station. It might give you a chance against Sovereign."

"Wait," Garrus interrupted. "Where's the Citadel's master control unit? I never heard of anything like that." It was a good question. Shepard was unfamiliar with the Citadel and if Garrus who had lived there wasn't certain, she wondered about the plan.

"Through the conduit. Follow Saren. He will lead you to your destination."

Shepard turned to the others and said, "Saren has enough of a head start. Grab that data file and let's move out."

"The one you call Saren has not reached the conduit. Not yet. There is still hope, if you hurry."

Finally a piece of good news. Shepard turned and ran back to the elevator after copying the data file onto her omnitool. As the elevator took them back to the Mako, she tapped her foot nervously, silently thinking that if they survived this, she would vow to invent a way to speed up all elevators everywhere. She felt Kaidan's hand, land on her shoulder, his silent, gentle way of trying to calm her nerves. Her adrenaline wasn't having it. She twitched and his hand fell, as Garrus softly hummed in his throat. The sound, for her, was more calming than the physical touch. She closed her eyes and listened to the reverberations that she wasn't supposed to be able to hear. Was he doing it on purpose, or did he forget that she could hear it?

When the elevator finally released them, they headed back to the Mako and saw that the shimmering barrier was gone. She jumped into her seat and immediately gunned it forward to continue through the bunker. It now felt like a silent cemetery after knowing what was in the pods that surrounded them. The place was eerie and she drove just a little faster. A few miles further into the bunker they ran into a few more geth and a dead end to where they were headed. After killing the geth, Shepard took a hard left turn that dropped the Mako into what appeared to be an aqueduct. Not pausing to take in the scenery, she drove, picking off geth and not stopping to finish off the ones she couldn't run over. The Mako would buy them time. Saren was on foot and she was not going to waste a second. The aqueduct twisted and turned, frustrating her, but she navigated it as best she could. Finally, they crested a short hill and they could see what looked like a miniature mass relay down below. "Holy Shit! It looks like that model on the Citadel! You don't think...?" She trailed off as she noticed the platoon of geth between them and the Conduit.

"I told you that thing was humming," Kaidan commented.

"Everyone strap in," she ordered and buckled her own belt. "I have no idea what is waiting for us on the other side of that thing."

"We're with you Shepard," Garrus said, prepping the guns to drop anything that tried to block their path.

She took a deep breath and let it out through her mouth to calm her nerves then started down the steep hill. The Mako picked up speed as they shot down the hill past squealing geth that got caught under her tires. "Shepard, the relay is slowing down!" Kaidan shouted as Garrus targeted a colossus on their right.

Shepard pushed harder down on the gas and the Mako picked up speed again. She hit the jump jets and it shot forward under the momentum. They were a few feet away when she felt the electric arcs of the relay licking the shields of the Mako. It jerked and there was a feeling of inertia that twisted her stomach as the inside of the Mako flashed bright, blinding her for a moment. Within moments, the Mako crashed out of the relay, slamming down on one of it's front tires. Before she could slam on the brakes, the tank bounced and flipped over, rolling along the ground and finally coming to a stop on its roof. Shepard groaned, feeling the bumps and bruises of the unprotected trip forming all over her body. She blinked, trying to regain her sight from the flash of light. She glanced around at her companions, fumbling with her seat belt. "Everyone alive?" she asked, her vision blurring. Her head was throbbing and there was something wet dripping from her left temple.

Grunts from her team signaled they were banged up but alive. "Why did I leave C-Sec again?" Garrus grumbled with slight humor. She turned in her seat to glance at him and he immediately spotted the gash on her forehead. "Shepard, your head..." he reached to turn her face to him so he could get a better look in the darkened space.

"I'll be fine," she insisted, her seat-belt finally coming loose. She had forgotten they were upside down and with the belt no longer holding her to the seat, she fell hard on her back on the ceiling. With another groan she rolled onto her knees to assess the state of the hatch and to swallow the nausea swimming in her gut. When the nausea passed, she sat on her butt to kick the door open. After a few swift knocks from her boot, the door shot away from its casing, completely detached from the Mako. "Garrus, you have a lot of work ahead of you when we get back to the Normandy," she said, meaning it as a joke, but the humor not reaching her voice.

"Shepard, if we make it back to the Normandy, I will buy you a new Mako," he said, letting himself out of his own seat belt and gracefully landing on his feet as Kaidan did the same.

She harrumphed and crawled her way out of the hatch into the chaos that was the Presidium. At least they had made it to the Citadel. She stood slowly as Kaidan and Garrus followed her out. Assessing the situation, she saw that they had indeed come out from the relay 'statue' she had recognized. The relay was now closed, all signs of activity gone. They had made it by the skin of their teeth. A broken Avina VI flashed nearby, warning everyone to evacuate. The Mako was on fire as was quite a bit of the Presidium. She turned her head to her companions and Garrus grabbed her upper arms to steady her and look at her head again. With a grunt, he activated some medigel and pressed it to the bleeding wound. "Thanks," she said, feeling the cooling gel already starting to work.

"That looks bad, Shepard," Kaidan said softly.

"We can't stop to do anything about it," she said. "Saren has a head start." The only area accessible from the relay was, surprise, surprise, an elevator. She recognized it as the one that ran all of the way up to the Council chambers. It made sense that the Control Center would probably be there. She started toward the elevator only to have her path blocked by a gaggle of husks. The mindless creatures ran toward her as she pulled out her shotgun. The sound of her shot resounded loudly in her pounding head, but she gritted her teeth and pushed forward. They killed the husks as quickly as they could and continued to the elevator before they could be waylaid again. Once inside, the elevator seemed to move faster than she had ever seen it go. Shepard thanked whoever was listening until suddenly, the elevator jerked to a stop. "Shit!" she cursed as a quick glance out the glass enclosure revealed most of the lights on the presidium going dark and the arms of the whole station closing up to seal them inside.

"Saren's cut the power," Garrus guessed as she struggled to think of something around the fog of her concussion.

Finally she unhooked her helmet from her belt and deactivated her visor. "Suit up, we're going out." Kaidan and Garrus secured their helmets and with the okay that they were ready, she pulled her pistol and shot through the glass. The shards flew outward into the vacuum that was outside the artificial atmosphere of the Citadel and floated slowly away until their momentum slowed and they hovered in the air. Shepard leaned out to look down and realized that was probably a terrible idea. Her heart sank and her vision swam as the sheer drop loomed before her. She backed up a step and gathered herself before activating her mag boots and stepping out to stand sideways on the side of the elevator shaft. "Alright, let's move."

As they fought their way through geth that had discovered their plan to make their own route to Saren, Shepard used her omnitool in between overloads to download a schematic of this section of the Presidium. Her read outs showed an access hatch that would put them back inside directly below the Council Chambers near where the elevator would have dropped them anyway. In between shooting geth and checking their progress, she noticed that Sovereign had made his debut. He was settling himself onto the top of the Presidium, his massive finger like attachments wrapping around the end to perch like a bird. She didn't spare the time to even glance back again, knowing that gawking at the massive Reaper would do them no good. She made her way to the hatch, proudly hacking a few of the Citadel's outer defenses to take out a geth drop ship along the way.

They finally made it to the hatch and she forced it open with her omnitool, allowing her, Garrus and Kaidan to drop in to one of the artificial ponds arranged near the Chambers. "Look, Big Guy, it's where we first met," she quipped as she climbed out of the pond and over the rail to solid ground. She breathed a sigh of relief as she removed her helmet and clipped it back to her belt.

"You're such a romantic," he cooed teasingly, removing his own helmet.

Kaidan pushed past him and pointed. "Let's reminisce later, look."

She followed his finger and up at the top of the stairs where the Council normally stood there was a huge console open that she had never seen before. They all checked their weapons before heading up toward the console. The area was deserted and Shepard felt uneasy. Where was Saren and his pet geth? When they crested the stairs, she realized that Saren was there after all. He was typing furiously on an interface in front of the console. Just as they approached him at a run, he slapped a button that looked like it activated something and then he pushed the interface aside and approached the console, disappearing down into the small garden area below the meeting place. Shepard stopped, raising her gun and pointing it toward where he had dropped. Before she had a chance to approach cautiously, Saren reappeared on his hover board craft, gun in hand and an active grenade in the other. He tossed the grenade at them and Garrus shoved Shepard to the left before diving to the right himself, pulling Kaidan with him. Each of them took cover behind the concrete stair rails as the grenade exploded, warming the area momentarily and leaving a scorch mark on the ground. Shepard breathed deeply, steadying her gun as she kept to the small cover. "I was afraid you wouldn't make it in time, Shepard," Saren taunted from his high horse.

"I had to wipe out a few hundred of your followers along the way, sorry if I kept you waiting!" she shouted, finished with the games.

"You've lost. You know that, don't you?" Saren's words made her blood boil. She would not give up. Not after everything. "In a few minutes, Sovereign will have full control of all the Citadel's systems. The relay will open. The Reapers will return."

"I've still got a few tricks up my sleeve," she stalled, trying to figure out what those tricks were exactly. Her head hurt and she wasn't sure how much more she could take.

"You survived our encounter on Virmire, but I've changed since then. Improved. Sovereign has... upgraded me." Saren continued to taunt her.

"You let Sovereign implant you? Are you insane?" If Saren had been fighting the indoctrination before, Shepard was convinced that he had officially lost the battle.

"I suppose I should thank you, Shepard. After Virmire, I couldn't stop thinking about what you said, about Sovereign manipulating me. About indoctrination. The doubts began to eat away at me. Sovereign sensed my hesitation. I was implanted to strengthen my resolve. Now my doubts are gone. I believe in Sovereign completely. I understand that the Reapers need organics. Join us and Sovereign will find a place for you, too."

Why did everyone she spoke to have to insist on monologuing? "Sovereign's controlling you through your implants! Don't you see that?"

Saren sighed. "The relationship is symbiotic. Organic and machine intertwined, a union of flesh and steel. The strengths of both, the weaknesses of neither. I am a vision of the future, Shepard. The evolution of all organic life. This is our destiny. Join Sovereign and experience a true Rebirth!"

In spite of his insistence, Shepard still felt the need to try and save Saren. He had once been a SPECTRE. There had to be some of him left somewhere. "Sovereign hasn't won yet. I can stop it from taking control of the station! Step aside and the invasion will never happen!"

Saren's response was given quickly as he spat his anger at her. "We can't stop it! Not forever. You saw the visions. You saw what happened to the Protheans. The Reapers are too powerful."

"Some part of you must still realize this is wrong. You can fight this!" Shepard insisted.

"Maybe..." Saren hesitated. "You're right. Maybe there is still a chance for..." His words were cut off by a pained sound. She spared a quick glance around her cover to see him clutching his head. "The implants!" he cried through gritted teeth. "Sovereign is too strong. I'm sorry. It's too late for me."

Shepard felt a burst of hope and decided she needed to face Saren for this conversation. She stood quickly from her cover and shouted. "It's not over yet. You can still redeem yourself!" Her hands were displayed in an offer of peace. Her weapon was holstered. She heard Garrus growling as he hated her decision to display herself so openly to the enemy, but she had to have hope. Every life was worth trying to save, even Saren's.

Saren looked at her mournfully. He was tired. She could sense it. "Goodbye, Shepard." He whispered. "Thank you." Before she could react, he lifted his own pistol and pushed it to his chin, pulling the trigger. Her hand was up, but there was nothing she could do. The shot resounded and Saren fell, crashing through the glass ceiling over the gardens.

When the surprise of his suicide passed, she dropped her hands and sighed. The stations alarms were sounding and her companions had joined her. She took off running toward the console to make use of the data drive she'd copied from Vigil. There was still time to stop Sovereign. She pulled the program up on her omnitool and interfaced with the console. Within seconds, the system reacted, transferring control over to her. She sighed with relief. "Vigil's data file worked. I've got control of all systems." She leaned heavily on the console to take a breath.

"Quick! Open the station's arms. Maybe the fleet can take Sovereign down before he regains control of the station!" Kaidan shouted through the fog that was trying to take her out. He gripped her arm and gently shook her.

She turned to face him and Garrus, focusing on their faces as Garrus spoke as well. "See if you can open a communications channel."

She nodded and fiddled with the program still running on her omnitool. She found an open channel and it was repeating a distress call over a loop. "...the Destiny Ascension. Main drives offline. Kinetic Barriers down 40%. The Council is on board. I repeat, the Council is on board."

Shepard didn't know what to do to help the Council's ship. Sovereign was going to take their whole fleet to take down. Suddenly another transmission came through her comm, much clearer than the Destiny Ascension's. She was relieved to hear Joker's voice. He must have returned when he heard their plans on Ilos through their comms."Normandy to the Citadel. Normandy to the Citadel. Please tell me that's you, Commander."

"I'm here, Joker!" she responded.

"We caught that distress call, Commander. I'm sitting here in the Andura sector with the entire Arcturus fleet." Shepard paced as Joker talked. "We can save the Ascension. Just unlock the relays around the Citadel and we'll send the cavalry in!"

"I don't think that's a good idea, Shepard. You'll lose a lot of human lives if you send the fleet to save the Council," Garrus warned, confirming her assessment.

"This is bigger than humanity!" Kaidan said, surprising her with his opinion. "Sovereign's a threat to every organic species in the galaxy!"

"Don't waste your reinforcements, Shepard. The council can rebuild. We need to get rid of Sovereign." The two of them arguing was making her head hurt.

"What's the order, Commander?" Joker asked. "Come in now to save the Ascension or hold back?"

She agreed with Garrus. The council was three people in the entire galaxy. Three very unhelpful people at that. She sighed as she resolved to make the sacrifice as she had with Ashley on Virmire. The few for the many. "Wait until those arms open, Joker. We need all our ships focusing on Sovereign, even if it means sacrificing the council."

"Let the council die to save the galaxy? I hope you know what you're doing, Shepard." Kaidan sighed, not questioning her order, but not really agreeing either.

She entered the orders on her omnitool to open the Citadel's arms, then stepped close to the edge of the platform to look down at Saren where he still laid motionless below. "Make sure he's dead," she said softly, meandering back toward the console to see if there was anything else she could do to help with the battle ensuing above their heads.

Kaidan and Garrus dropped down into the garden and she heard a shot before Kaidan's voice came over her comm. "He's dead."

A few moments passed and as she was studying the controls, the Presidium where they stood began to light up with flashes of red lightening. She looked down toward Saren's body and her companions who were dodging the flashes as they struck near the dead Turian. Her heart sped as she saw the corpse begin to seize and the lightning converged on it. Pained noises emanated from Saren's throat. He'd taken two shots to the head. There was no way she should be seeing what she was seeing. The corpse was being reanimated by the lightning as it reacted with the circuitry that Saren had called his upgrades. A pulse of energy whipped from the body and threw Kaidan and Garrus off their feet. Before she could react it hit the supports of the platform and knocked her down. Struggling for purchase, she failed to get a grip as the platform collapsed and rolled her off to hit the ground hard. She gasped, struggling to catch her breath, trying to get up off her chest and onto her feet, knowing whatever was happening could not be good. She had to get up!

The others were slowly getting up beside her and she pushed up, gathering her knees up under her as the corpse continued to transform. When she finally made it to her feet, she looked up at the monstrosity that used to be Saren. All trace of organic life was melted away. What stood before her now was a metal skeleton powered by Sovereign and whatever connection he was using. It's glowing red eyes turned on her and her people before it crouched and hopped up to cling to the ceiling just like some of the geth that they had come to call hoppers. "I AM SOVEREIGN! AND THIS STATION IS _MINE_!"

They all drew their weapons and fired on the thing. It was faster than Shepard could handle with her concussion and she stumbled as it tried to jump on her. Before it reached her, Kaidan grabbed it with his biotics and kept it still for a moment so she and Garrus could pepper it with bullets. When it broke out of the biotic field, she took the moment while it was distracted going after Kaidan to try and run a hacking program on the machinery. Kaidan got off a few shots of his own before grabbing it again with his biotics. She shot her program toward it, but it was completely ineffective. She growled and unloaded some more rounds from her pistol before it broke lose again. The cycle continued and she could hear explosions happening outside the Presidium among the din of their own battle. Her shields took a few hits from the lasers that Sovereign was shooting out at them, but they held intact. She could see the others flagging, but Kaidan continued to grab the bastard and hold it as long as he could in spite of the nosebleed he was dealing with. She could hear communications from outside here and there, speaking of the casualties the fleet was taking, but she continued to fight. The faster they could take down the abomination in front of them, perhaps they would help hurt Sovereign by hurting his avatar. Shepard unloaded a fresh clip into the skeleton and with one final shot from Garrus that whizzed by her and hit the thing dead center of its chest, it collapsed, skidding across the ground because it had been mid jump. Before she could approach it, the thing disintegrated to dust before her eyes. "Did I just see that?" she asked, blinking and hoping she hadn't actually passed out from her injuries and was dreaming.

"I'm pretty sure that just happened," Garrus agreed.

She heard Joker's voice over the comms shouting that Sovereign's shields were down. There was a great creaking sound as something happened outside. Shepard looked up to see if she could see anything as a great explosion rocked the Presidium. Her heart skipped as she saw bits of the Reaper careening toward where they were. "Go!" She shouted, shoving Garrus out of the way and diving as far as she could to get away from the crashing debris. After the stuff crashed through the windows, she saw it coming for her and heard someone shouting her name as she curled into a ball and covered her head with her arms to shield from the glass raining down on her. Something heavy hit her left arm and she heard a sickening snapping sound before a flash of pain washed over her and laid the final straw on the camel's back, taking her consciousness away.

 


	9. Galactic Decisions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With the Council dead, who will pick up the slack?

Garrus laid on his back, nursing the sprained ankle he'd suffered when Shepard had shoved him out of the way. Kaidan was slipping in and out of consciousness a few feet away from him, but all he could think about was what had happened to Shepard. She had disappeared under the rubble and he hadn't heard a peep since. Was she alive? Was she hurt? He was terrified for her. She had gone into the fight with a pretty bad head wound and probably other injuries that he hadn't been able to see. He tried to get up to find her, but his leg wouldn't take the weight. Flashes of light distracted him from his task. He turned around and squinted past the holes in the debris surrounding him, picking out voices and omnitool flashlights. A group of humans were picking their way through the rubble when one of them shouted. "Captain Anderson! We found them! They're in here!"

Garrus sighed with relief. A rescue party. He wasn't sure if there was enough left of the Presidium to send anyone in, but apparently the Alliance had come through. Shepard's old Captain ducked in under a large gap in the rubble and approached Garrus. "Take it easy," he said in a soothing voice. "It's over. You're safe now." A pause in his voice as he waved in medics to take care of Kaidan and he spoke again. "Where's the Commander? Where's Shepard?"

Garrus was unable to speak past the threatening keen in his subvocals as he imagined the worst happening to Shepard. He simply glanced toward where he had last seen her before the place had crashed down on top of her. Anderson's gaze followed his own and the man looked heart broken as he saw the terrible burning wreckage and pieces of Reaper. The medics got Kaidan to his feet and started to lead him out while Anderson turned his attention to Garrus and helped him to stand. Garrus almost refused to leave, but he knew that he would be useless with his injury. He limped beside Anderson toward the human sized hole in the debris they had come in from. Suddenly, there was a shifting in the rubble behind them. He spun, painfully twisting his foot more. "Spirits!" he gasped as he saw the impossible.

Shepard climbed up out of the wreckage, her left arm clutched to her side and the head wound bleeding again. She stumbled a bit but when she noticed Anderson, she found some reserve of strength and jogged down from the top of the pile of rubble toward them. She was grinning widely and she managed a wink at Kaidan before turning her gaze to Garrus. "God, look at you two. I leave you alone for five minutes...." her voice slurred and she weaved a little before trying to catch her balance with her injured arm and hissing at the pain.

Anderson patted Garrus as a warning and stepped away to help Shepard before she fell over. Garrus maintained his balance by leaning heavily on another human that stepped in to take Anderson's place. He was so happy to see Shepard mostly intact, that the keening in his subvocals turned to a 'purr' as Shepard called it. They were all alive and Sovereign was dead. That was what mattered.

* * *

 

Shepard woke a few days later surrounded by beeping machines and the smell of antiseptic. Before opening her eyes to the bright lights, she took stock of her surroundings by smell and sound. Obviously she was in a hospital, but she knew it was too bright to be the Normandy's med bay. Were they still on the Citadel? There was an underlying sound that she recognized but her drug addled brain took a few minutes to remember what it was. When she opened her eyes, she looked toward where the sound was coming from and recognized it immediately. "Garrus," she whispered, her throat dry and scratchy.

His attention turned to her and the humming stopped. "Hey, Shepard." His mandibles parted wide in a Turian smile. "How are you feeling?"

She groaned as her injuries made themselves known. Her head throbbed in the bright light and her broken arm was wrapped in a cast that itched. "As well as you'd expect," she answered, swallowing around her dry throat. "Where's Kaidan?" she asked noting the absence.

Garrus stood and she noticed his foot and ankle were wrapped tightly with an ace bandage. He hobbled to a table across the room and poured a glass of water from a pitcher and plopped a straw in it before slowly coming back to her and handing it to her. She took it gratefully with her good arm and sipped deeply as he said. "Kaidan took a pretty good beating too. A few broken ribs and his amp got a little rattled from over use. He'll be fine though in a few days, just like the docs tell me you will be." He chuckled. "You should have seen Chakwas after Joker docked. I've never seen a human take over a room the way that woman took over this hospital."

Shepard chuckled too, setting her glass down beside her bed on a table. "I'm glad he's okay. What about you?"

"I managed to escape with no more than a few bruises from the Mako and this sprained ankle from when you shoved me. Thanks a lot by the way," he joked.

"Payback for letting me get shot back on Therum," she teased.

"That was one time!" he protested, the laugh in his voice making her smile. She had been so worried about her people when she'd regained consciousness after getting pelted by Sovereign debris that she was convinced that was the reason she had been able to claw her way out of that mess in her state.

Before she could respond, the door to her room whooshed open and Anderson walked in, grinning from ear to ear. "Shepard!" he said, genuine relief in his voice. She was surprised to see him not in jail for letting her and the Normandy escape. Then she remembered he had been there when they were rescued.

"Anderson! You're apparently a free man. What happened?" she asked as he approached the bed.

Garrus stepped to the side, barely looking like his injury was causing him any discomfort. Anderson waved his hand and said, "They wouldn't dare lock me up after the Normandy was instrumental in saving the galaxy. In hindsight, my treason was what let you do what needed to be done. I came to warn you though," he said. Before he could continue, Ambassador Udina stepped in through the door. Shepard tried to hide her distaste, but she grinned at the shiner he was sporting. Anderson patted her shoulder and winked before turning around to face Udina. "I got your message, Ambassador. What's all of this about?"

Udina scowled at each of them in turn, saving an especially bitter one for Anderson. "No need to get worked up, Captain. I'd like to end this meeting with all my teeth still in place."

Shepard nearly spit out the water she had picked up and took another sip of when he alluded that Anderson had given him the shiner. "You should thank me for what I did," Anderson growled. "If the Normandy was still grounded, we'd all be dead right now!"

"I understand, Captain. You did what you had to do. That's not why you're here. We need to talk about what happened to the Council." Udina grumbled.

"Commander Shepard did the right thing. We had to hold our fleet back to go after Sovereign. It was the only way." Anderson defended her.

Udina held up a hand. "I agree, but this also presents us with an opportunity. The Citadel fleets were decimated in the attack. Their losses have made the Alliance stronger. They can't rebuild without us! We need to take the lead in forming a new council. One with a human chairman at its head."

Shepard heard the growl from Garrus and she agreed. Udina was a bastard. Everything was about political gain with him. They should be mourning the loss of the Council and rebuilding, not trying to take over the galaxy. "I can see the other races inviting us to join the Council, but lead it? That's a whole different story." She protested.

"The other species are scared. They've never faced anything like this before. They don't know what to do. They want us to step forward. They believe in us because of you Shepard. You saved the galaxy from Sovereign. You're a symbol of everything good about humanity. Our courage, our strength."

Shepard didn't believe that Udina had the right to include himself in those categories, but she remained silent as Anderson spoke. "The Ambassador's right. The other races look up to us now. They won't just accept our leadership, they'll welcome it."

"Given everything you've done, Commander," Udina continued. "The Alliance will want to know who you think our council chairman should be."

Shepard glanced at Garrus who looked like he was starting to agree. He shrugged and she knew exactly who she was going to choose without a second thought. "We're about to go into war. We need somebody with military experience, someone like Captain Anderson."

Anderson spun around to face her, his eyes wide. Udina grumbled and said, "You make a good case." Then he looked to Anderson and said, "Captain, are you ready for this?"

His expression conveyed shock, but he composed himself. "I don't know if any of us are ready, but I'll do what I can, but what happens now?"

"The Reapers are still out there," Shepard added. "They're coming, and I'm gonna find some way to stop them." She realized that would have been a great time to walk away dramatically, but she was stuck in the bed. She crossed her arms instead, hoping her point got across.

"Shepard's right. We're headed for war with the Reapers. If we lose, it's the end of all life as we know it. We have to show the rest of the galaxy what it takes to survive. With the support of the other races, we can win this battle. With them behind us, we can stand against the Reaper's return and drive them back into dark space." Anderson spoke boldly as Udina scowled at Shepard's decision.

Soon, they both left her to rest and Garrus sat back down in the chair beside her bed. "What do you think, Big Guy?" she asked.

He shrugged. "I'm not in charge, Shepard. I just work here."

They remained silent for a minute before Shepard sighed. "That _thing_ is going to haunt me for a long time."

He hummed his agreement. "I've got a feeling that was just the beginning of the nightmares." His gaze was distant as he looked out the window where they had a first rate view of the chaos of the Presidium. It was hard to imagine they were on the same space station. It was so quiet there in the hospital. She wriggled up to a sitting position, and Garrus automatically responded by shoving a second pillow behind her back.

Before she could thank him, her door opened again and Laira, Tali and Wrex were standing there smiling at her. "They told us you were awake," Liara said, her soft voice reflecting the smile she was wearing.

Tali was bouncing on her toes like she did when she was excited or nervous. "I thought you wouldn't wake up before I had to catch my transport," she said in her accented metallic voice.

"Yeah, Shepard. You squishy humans are slow to recover." Wrex boomed.

She smiled at him and said, "Well not every species has the advantage of a redundant system." Then she turned back to Tali. "What's this about a transport? You leaving me?"

Tali wrung her hands together, still bouncing and said, "I figured since we defeated Saren, I could take that geth data back to the Flotilla and complete my Pilgrimage... unless you still needed me."

Shepard smiled warmly at the young Quarian. She was so nervous that Shepard believed that if she ordered her to, she would stay. "I'll always need you, Tali, but you should go back to your people. Help them. They deserve the chance that data could give them. Promise me you'll keep in touch though, okay?"

Tali bounced over to Shepard and nearly jumped into her arms for a hug. "Of course, Shepard! Keelah, you're going to make me cry."

Shepard chuckled and patted Tali's back before she stepped away again. "I'll be leaving too, Shepard." Wrex admitted. At Shepard's pout, he continued. "I need to get back to Tuchanka and unite the Krogan. If the Reapers are coming, we need to be ready for them."

"You think you can get them to listen?" Shepard asked.

Wrex chuckled loudly. "If I can't, I'll give you a call, Shepard. You can help me headbutt them into submission."

She laughed too while Liara cleared her throat. "I will _not_ be leaving if that's alright. I'm sure that in our travels to finish off the geth stragglers, we will run into many exciting adventures and possibly some Prothean ruins I can actually visit this time." The hint to visit Ilos was laced with a teasing lilt in her voice.

"I'm glad you're staying, Liara. I'm sure we can find something for you to get into." Shepard replied, the smile she was wearing beginning to hurt her face. Everyone stayed for a bit to chat before leaving to catch one transport or another and Garrus remained suspiciously quiet. Once every one else had gone, she turned her head to him and said softly, "What's on your mind, Big Guy?"

"Hm?" She seemed to jar him from his thoughts and he glanced at her. "Oh, nothing."

She swore if Turians could blush he would be seven shades of blue. "Oh, please, Garrus. I have come to see myself as an expert on Turian facial expressions in the last few months. Something is bothering you. Something you don't want to tell me."

His subharmonics hummed with nerves as he sat forward. "I heard from my father after the battle. It seems that news of our heroics traveled all of the way to Palaven already."

"You said your father was not a big fan of the SPECTRES. I'm sure he was thrilled to hear you were involved with one stealing a military ship and blowing up a good portion of the presidium."

"I think 'less than pleased' is an understatement. Although he was proud that I helped defend the galaxy." He rubbed his hands together in a nervous tick she'd never seen from him before. His mandibles were flicking erratically as he struggled to spit out whatever news was bothering him. "Do you remember right after I joined you that message you sent me about always having your six?"

She nodded, her heart rate rising. Now she understood why he was so upset. "I get it, Big Guy. I'm not mad."

He looked at her, eyes wide. "I don't want to leave, Shepard, but my father says, and I agree, that C-Sec is going to need help restoring order here." She felt tears in her eyes that she wasn't certain were fully justified. She brushed them aside but not before he saw them. "I promise Shepard, as soon as I am able, I will be back on the Normandy."

"You're not obligated to me, Garrus. You're my best friend and I'll miss you, but I really do understand," she managed to say without letting any more tears fall.

He took her good hand in both his and smiled around his own emotions. "I will be writing to tell you about all of my exciting paperwork. Try not to get shot at too much, okay?"

"I try not to make promises I can't keep." She choked out a laugh.

That was how Kaidan walked in on them. Her crying and him holding her hand. "What's all this, then?" Kaidan asked, wincing as he nursed his broken ribs to cross the room.

She smiled through her tears, truly glad to see him. He looked no worse for the wear as he returned the smile. "Garrus was just explaining why he needs to stay on the Citadel after the Normandy is reassigned."

Kaidan frowned. "You're not coming with?" he asked, turning his gaze on Garrus.

Garrus shook his head and stood. "I believe this is yours, Alenko," he said, lifting her hand and offering it to Kaidan. Kaidan limped closer and took her hand, kissing it softly before sitting down gingerly in the chair Garrus had been using.

She watched Garrus limp to the door and give her a half salute before he opened it to go. "Goodbye, Big Guy," she called after him before the door closed and he disappeared.

 


	10. A Whole New Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard hits a snag and wakes up in 'enemy' hands and not quite the same.

It had been months since they had defeated Saren and Sovereign. The Council and the Alliance were both willing to sweep the whole Reaper story under the carpet. Even with her and Anderson shouting the truth, the Normandy and her crew had still been reassigned to hunt down any geth stragglers. Sovereign was being explained away as a geth construct and Shepard was frustrated.

She was sitting in her cabin after a long day of scanning systems for geth activity, that as usual turned up nothing, when Kaidan arrived. She was pouring over a mountain of data pads outlining disappearances all over the system that had no explanation and he stepped up behind her to press his fingers into her shoulders, massaging away the stress. She leaned into him, dropping her data pad and sighing with relief. Her omnitool pinged and she glanced briefly at it to see that Garrus had responded to the message she'd sent him earlier that day. She brushed aside the interruption as Kaidan leaned down to lay gentle kisses on her neck, just below her ear. The man certainly knew how to distract her. She dislodged his hands to stand up and turn into his arms. She grabbed his neck and kissed him while maneuvering him toward the bed. He sat down on the edge of the bed and she sat on his lap, her knees straddling his hips. His hands rested on her hips as she craned her neck to kiss his lips.

Suddenly, the ship shook violently, nearly knocking her backwards. "The hell?" she said as another shake rumbled through them.

Emergency lights started to flash and she pushed away from Kaidan to find out what was happening. A few quick words from Joker told her they were under attack from an unknown vessel. "Shepard, what do you want me to do?" Kaidan asked, touching her arm.

She turned to him and said, "Gather everyone you can and get them onto the escape pods." The ship shook again and she grabbed her gear as he took off from her room to follow his orders.

She quickly strapped on her gear and ran from her room with her helmet under her arm. Seeing the state of the ship, she nearly panicked. People were running and screaming and there were fires everywhere. As she pulled her helmet down over her head and quickly started the protocol for lighting their distress beacon, Liara came running up to her in full armor. "Shepard!"

"Distress beacon is ready for launch," she told Liara, grabbing a couple of fire extinguishers and tossing one to the Asari.

"Will the Alliance get here in time?" Liara asked, glancing around at the destruction that had already cropped up all over the ship.

"They'd better. I'm not doing this so they can find our frozen corpses," she said, spraying down the fires closest to the escape pods that had yet to be launched. "Get everyone onto the escape shuttles." She felt better knowing that her friends would be helping everyone they could and getting out alive themselves while she handled the distress beacon.

"Joker's still in the cockpit. He won't evacuate. I'm not leaving either," Liara insisted, spraying more fires down while Shepard found a working console and typed out some more commands to get the beacon launched and emergency protocols underway.

"I need you to get the crew onto the evac shuttles," she said, heading over to Liara and landing a hand on her shoulder. "I'll take care of Joker."

Liara finally nodded and Shepard turned to go toward the cockpit. Something exploded in front of her and she backpedaled toward Liara. "Shepard..."

"Liara, go!" She turned to look at the girl. "Now!"

"Aye, aye," Liara said with a sigh and jogged off to do as she was bade.

Shepard put the finishing touches on the beacon and slammed the button to send it off, letting the Alliance know they were in trouble. Explosions were happening all around her as she made her way toward the cockpit. Up the stairs from where the elevator was burning, she opened the door to the CIC, silently thankful that she would never have to ride that elevator again. When she stepped into the CIC, her mag boots engaged and she looked up into open space. The entire roof of the ship was gone. Not sparing the time to gawk at the destruction, she saw the escape pods floating away from the ship and was glad the rest of the crew was safe. She walked as quickly as her mag boots would allow toward where Joker was sealed off from the destruction with an environmental barrier. When she passed back into the gravity seal, she jogged up to Joker who was constantly shouting a mayday and frantically working the controls and trying to keep the ship afloat. "Come on, Joker! We have to get out of here!" she pleaded.

He had turned his usual baseball cap backwards and a specialized breather mask was over his face. "No! I won't abandon the Normandy! I can still save her!"

"The Normandy's lost," she said calmly. "Going down with the ship won't change that."

His expression conveyed heartbreak as he stopped his frantic steering. "Yeah, okay. Help me up." Shepard reached down to help, but he stopped mid stand. "They're coming around for another attack!" Right behind them in the corridor she had just walked through a huge yellow beam ripped through the hull, severing the bridge from the rest of the ship. They had to go. Now. Shepard turned back to Joker and grabbed his forearm to drag him away from the controls. "Ah! Watch the arm!" he protested as she pulled him along and tucked his arm over her shoulders to support him and his brittle bones. She practically carried him to the last remaining escape pod and shoved him in. Before she could climb in after him, another explosion rocked the ship. The shockwave threw her backwards, slamming her into a wall and gravity ceased. She tried to activate her mag boots as she floated, but she was nowhere close to any surface to connect to. She looked back at Joker who was calling her name from inside the escape pod. Another of the yellow beams was close to severing the escape pod from the controls. She did what she had to. She reached for the launch button and barely tapped it, closing off Joker and his protests behind the door and launching the pod. She saw the pod shoot away from the ship just before the beam hit a fuel line and a massive explosion threw her backwards again.

Her back slammed into a bulkhead that was floating still intact and then she careened out of the ship completely. Panic set in as the Normandy disintegrated around her. She floated helplessly and then spotted a steady stream of air puffing up around her. Her suit's alarms began to sound, telling her something was wrong. She reached behind her as she felt the air in her suit thinning. The slam to the bulkhead must have ripped a hole in her line. She grabbed frantically at the thin cord that was sucking oxygen from her body faster and faster. She gasped, her chest getting tight as her vision swam and the cold vacuum of space closed in around her. _So this is the end_. _Goodbye Kaidan. I'm sorry Garrus._ The last thing she saw aside from the bits of flaming Normandy around her was a planet looming close by and then as she spun in her panic, the great empty openness that was space.

* * *

 

Garrus woke one morning, months after his decision to stay behind and re-join C-Sec. Something felt off about his morning. He stretched, and got out of bed to check his messages as usual. He had gotten used to the daily back and forth from Shepard as she told him about how much fun she was having without him. When he didn't see a message from her, he frowned. That was unlike her. He showered, dressed and headed for the office. When he reached C-Sec headquarters, he was taken aback to see a collection of Alliance soldiers flanking a very upset looking Councilor Anderson. He was ready to ignore the hubbub until Anderson approached him. "Officer Vakarian, I have some news. Could we go somewhere private?"

Garrus really didn't like the sound of Anderson's tone. It was like he was close to tears. Garrus' heart raced as he followed the Councilor to a secluded office. "What is it?" he asked impatiently as Anderson closed the door behind them and leaned his forehead against it.

"You might wish to sit down," the man said, pushing away from the door and turning to stand formally with his hands behind his back.

"I can stand," Garrus insisted, almost wanting to shake the man if it would hurry him up.

Anderson sighed. "Last night at 21:42 PM, the Normandy was shot down over Alchera by unknown forces. Most of the crew survived, but..." Anderson sighed again and swallowed before continuing. "Commander Shepard went down with the ship."

Shock rendered Garrus numb. Shepard was dead? He couldn't believe it. There was no way. After everything she had survived, she was taken down by 'unknown forces'? "How?" he managed to ask.

"Apparently when she went to rescue Joker, she was thrown from the ship in an explosion and her oxygen tube was damaged," Anderson choked.

"She suffocated! Alone?!" Garrus shouted, unable to control himself. He knew rationally there was nothing he could do, but he felt a need to do something so he shouted and punched the wall.

"I know you were friends," Anderson said calmly. "That girl was like a daughter to me. I'm sorry."

Garrus unclenched his fist, a hysterical choke of laughter escaping him. "Friends... yeah." Shepard was more than that to him. She was his rock, his confidant, his moral compass. He felt himself losing control and was glad that Shepard was the only human he knew of that would have been able to hear the keening that flooded unbidden from his subvocals.

"Once the search is concluded, there will be a funeral held to honor her." Anderson continued, but Garrus didn't want to hear him anymore.

He took his leave as politely as he could manage and stalked out of the office, unsure of where he was going. Nothing made sense anymore. Shepard was gone. The one time he hadn't had her six and she was gone.

* * *

 

Her funeral was bleak. It had been a week since he had received the news of her death and each day that passed, the universe seemed just a little bit darker. He'd spent most of the first few days getting drunk until he couldn't feel his mandibles, but that was no way to honor her, no matter how much it numbed the pain in the empty space in his chest. The keening had returned as soon as he'd sobered and now here he was standing beside an empty casket with her picture staring at him from its place on the dais. Everyone had come to pay their respects. Tali was sobbing loudly and he imagined a puddle forming in her helmet from the tears. Even the thought that should have been amusing tightened his chest because he knew it was a Shepard thing to think. Wrex was a silent boulder. Garrus had never seen him so resigned. The Krogan was wearing the battle armor of his ancestors that Shepard had helped him recover. He had called it junk, but he obviously wore it now out of respect and as a symbol of their friendship. Liara and Kaidan were leaning on each other, both of them sporting red rimmed eyes from excessive crying. Liara more so than Kaidan who had reigned himself in for appearances sake and was standing stoically with his arm around the bawling Asari.

Joker was the worst. His arm was in a sling, obviously having been broken in the escape and Dr. Chakwas was standing beside him as he silently blamed himself. Garrus could see the guilt all over his face. He was dressed in Navy dress blues and had removed his signature baseball cap. Even though he wasn't crying, the man was in pain. After the funeral was over, the others tried to talk with him, but he shrugged them all off, limping away toward the wards. Garrus knew the feeling. He wished he had been there to watch over her like he'd promised so long ago.

* * *

 

Someone was shaking her. Someone was shouting. Shepard opened her eyes to the flashing lights of an emergency. No one was shaking her. That was an explosion. She looked around and focused her hearing on the voice shouting at her. "Get out of that bed, Commander! This facility is under attack!" She opened her mouth to speak and a sharp pain caused her to reach up and grab her face. It felt terrible. There were marks everywhere. "Your scars aren't healed, but I need you to get moving!" the voice continued. The last thing she remembered was the blackness. The open empty void of space. She was dead. How was she here? How was she anywhere? She moved to sit up and another sharp pain wracked her ribs. She clutched at her side as she swung her legs over the side of the bed. "There is armor and a weapon in the locker to your right. Hurry!" She looked around and saw she was in a large white room that could be nothing else but a hospital. Had she survived the Normandy's destruction? How? She remembered death. The voice was egging her on urgently so she got down off the bed and made her way to the locker. She clipped on the strange armor and it fit her like a glove.

"This pistol doesn't have a thermal clip," she complained, checking the gun.

"We'll worry about that later, Commander. Right now you need to take cover. That door ahead is about to blow. Shield yourself from the blast." The woman speaking had a thick Australian accent that Shepard did not recognize. Whoever this person was, Shepard didn't know her.

Shepard did as she was told, crouching behind a small set of portable medical drawers. There was a loud explosion and Shepard's ears rang as she stood up from her cover and headed for the newly opened exit. Just outside the door was a thermal clip on the ground. Shepard happily picked up the clip and loaded it into her pistol. She ducked down behind another small bit of cover at the prompting of the voice. She peered up over the shielding and saw a security mech firing its weapon in her direction. She aimed the pistol and landed a perfect head shot, causing the mech to explode. The recoil jarred her arms and made her body ache worse. She wished she had her omnitool so she could overload some mechs instead of firing at them.

As she moved through the facility, she came across a grenade launcher and grabbed it up. The woman, who called herself Miranda, warned her about a group of mechs approaching and instead of shooting them with her pistol, Shepard grinned and launched a grenade into the group. They all fell under the explosion and she took the lift down toward where they had been. A small hole had been blown in a pipe and an oxygen powered flamethrower was now blocking her way. Taking a few short breaths, Shepard sprinted through the spout of flames to get by. Once through, she made sure she wasn't on fire and took her pistol back out. Miranda's voice started to cut in and out as the comms were interrupted with interference. Finally, she lost contact all together and Shepard was left to her own devices. She found a few audio files that she stopped to listen to and the information she was gathering was disturbing at best. A holo of the woman whose voice had been giving her orders spoke in logs about her 'reanimation'. Another holo of a man spoke about the billions of credits thrown into the project. What the hell had happened to her?

A few rooms later, she came across a young black man crouched behind a railing to a catwalk that covered him from the mechs shooting at him from across a chasm in the floor. Thankful she wasn't the only one under attack, she scurried across the short bridge to join him, shooting a few mechs herself before taking cover next to him. "What are you doing here?" he asked, shock in his voice. "I thought you were still a work in progress."

"Are you with Miranda?" Shepard asked, taking him in. His physique was superb, showing years of militaristic training. The armor he wore was thin, but it was top notch. She didn't recognize the symbol emblazoned over his left pectoral. His skin was dark and his hair was kept short, small waves brushed into it, circling his head. He had thick lips and a strong jawline paired with dark brown eyes.

"Yeah, sorry. I forgot this is all new to you right now. I'm Jacob Taylor. I've been stationed here for..." his words were cut off by an attacking mech. "dammit!" he shouted as the bullet meant for his head hit the rail and ricocheted back. He stood up and took out the offending mech with a perfect head-shot and crouched back down beside her. "Things must be worse than I thought if Miranda's got you running around. I'll fill you in, but we better get you to the shuttle first."

"I know this isn't the best time," she insisted. Someone had to have answers for her. "But I'm sick of stumbling around when I don't know what's going on."

"Fair enough," Jacob sighed. "I'll give you the quick version. You and your ship were attacked and destroyed. You were killed. Dead as dead can be when they brought you here. Our scientists spent the last two years putting you back together. You've been comatose, or worse, that whole time. Welcome back to your life."

"This doesn't look like an Alliance facility," she poked, trying to get an idea of who she was dealing with.

"It isn't," he confirmed. "I can't say much more than that for now. The Alliance officially declared you killed in action. The whole galaxy thinks your dead and if we don't get to those shuttles, they'll be right."

His tone was brash, but he was right. She couldn't worry about much now besides staying alive, but she just had to know about her people. "Are there any other survivors from the Normandy?"

"I'll tell you what. You help me finish off these mechs and I'll play twenty questions with you all day. We're low on thermal clips, but I'm a biotic. Just give the order when you want me to hit 'em with the good stuff." He demonstrated by standing and using a pull on one of the mechs to yank it from the ground and drop it into the chasm between them. Shepard agreed and they worked together to take out the mechs. Her body was aching when she stood from her crouch while he holstered his pistol. "Okay, I promised I'd answer your questions. What do you want to know?"

Shepard's mind had been racing as they killed the mechs. She had been dropped into a very confusing situation and she wanted to know everything. She started with the most pressing question that kept running through her head. "You said they spent two years rebuilding me? How bad were my injuries?" If that timeline were true, she had missed a lot. She didn't want to think about what her friends had been through if they thought she was dead.

"I'm no doctor, but it was bad. When I first saw you, you were nothing but meat and tubes. Anyone else, they would have put you in a coffin, but project Lazarus was different. Cutting edge technology." He explained a hint of disgust and pride mixed together in his voice.

"What do you mean?" she asked, a slew of possibilities racing through her head. "Cloning? Cybernetics?"

"I don't know the details, you'd have to ask the scientists, but I'm pretty sure you're not a clone. They wanted to bring you back exactly as you were. You're still you. You just might have a few extra bits and pieces now." He pointed to the back of his own head to indicate his biotic amp implant. Was she a biotic? That was impossible.

She shook off the implications until she could test it in truth. "What can you tell me about the project? Were there other test subjects?"

"Project Lazarus only had one subject. The whole point was to bring you back. Just you and even that was a challenge." He shrugged. "Two years, all the top scientists, and the best technology money could buy."

"All of that just to put humpty dumpty back together?" she sighed and he chuckled at her analogy. This was so much to take in. "The last thing I remember is the Normandy blowing up. Did anyone else make it?" She had to be sure that Kaidan and Liara and Joker and the rest were all safe.

"Just about everybody survived. A few servicemen from the lower decks didn't get out. Navigator Pressley was killed in an explosion, but everyone else including the non Alliance crew, the Asari, Liara, they all made it out alive."

He had eased her mind but she still felt the need to find them and make sure for herself. "Do you know what any of them are doing now?"

"I dunno, Commander. It's been two years. They've moved on, left the Alliance, could be anywhere."

"They were my team. If they knew I was alive, they'd come back," she insisted.

"Maybe you could track them down after we get off the station. If we get off the station." The last sounded like a jab at the time she was wasting, but she didn't care. She had to know these things.

With a sigh, she decided to shut her mouth and get out of there before he lost patience. "What's the quickest way to those shuttles?" Her mind was still racing and she felt disconnected and out of sorts. Maybe what she needed was time to relax and get acclimated to her new existence.

Jacob nodded his approval of her decision then said, "Depends where the mechs are the thickest. It's probably best if..."

He was cut off by a voice over his omnitool's comm. Another man was sending out a call to check for survivors. She recognized the voice from the log about billions of credits. They had a short conversation where the man, Wilson, sounded extremely surprised that she was up and walking around. He directed them through service tunnels so they could meet up with him. While they were working toward him, he shouted his alarm at being shot. When they finally got to him, he was sitting on the floor, clutching a bullet wound in his calf. Shepard rushed to a dispenser on the wall and patched him up with some medigel. After an argument between Wilson and Jacob about whether Miranda was alive or if she was the traitor, they were set upon by another group of mechs. Wilson blew a bunch of gas tanks with his overload, taking out the mechs all at once. Shepard was jealous. She missed her omnitool.

"This is getting tense," Jacob said before they continued. "Shepard, if I tell you who we work for, will you trust me?"

"This really isn't the time, Jacob," Wilson protested.

"We won't make it if she's expecting a shot in the back," Jacob argued.

"If you wanna piss off the boss, it's your ass, Jacob." Wilson waved his hand dismissively, turning away.

"The Lazarus Project, the program that rebuilt you. It's funded and controlled by Cerberus." Jacob dropped the bomb on her like he knew she would be pissed. She knew that symbol had looked familiar, but she had yet to place it. As soon as he said it, her mind raced back to her days on the Normandy, trying in vein to track down Admiral Kahoku and being attacked by the creepers and Rachni that Cerberus had sent on them. Her temper flared.

She crossed her arms. "I think I ran into Cerberus a few times while I was investigating Saren. Some kind of pro-human splinter group, right?"

"Well that's what the Alliance wants people to believe, but there's more to it. The Alliance declared you dead. They gave up. Cerberus spent a fortune to bring you back. Look I'd be suspicious too, but right now we have to work together. I thought you deserved to know what's what. Once we're off the station, I'll take you to the Illusive Man. He'll explain everything. I promise."

"I don't care what they did or what you say, I am not working with terrorists," Shepard said, turning her back on Jacob and moving toward where Wilson had said the shuttle bay was.

"You can tell it to the boss, but after we've saved our butts. We're almost to the shuttle," Jacob said, following after her with Wilson dragging in the rear. They weren't exactly who she'd wanted covering her six.

* * *

 

Meeting Miranda was an interesting experience. The woman had shot Wilson in cold blood as soon as she'd seen him, her only explanation being that she knew he was the traitor who had turned the station against them. After they'd gotten on the shuttle, she'd grilled Shepard about her past, making sure that she could still remember who she had been. Jacob had kindly stood up for her, realizing the questions were not exactly making her comfortable. She'd asked about Elysium and Virmire, two of Shepard's least favorite experiences after Mindoir, but no one but Garrus knew what had really happened there. While they taxi'd from the station she'd woken up on to a second station a few light years away, she took a moment to evaluate her condition. Even though she couldn't see her own face, she could feel scarring all over her cheeks and around her eyes. She reached up cautiously and felt a small incision mark in the back of her head where Jacob had indicated earlier.

"Do I have a biotic amp?" she asked, her heart starting to race.

Miranda smirked, widening her already wide mouth as Shepard interrupted her rambling about the Illusive Man. Miranda showed clear signs of genetic modification all over. She was much shorter than Shepard, but she made up for it with tall heels that she walked in like she'd been born in them. Her skin tight white and black catsuit left little to the imagination. She had large breasts and an equally large rear end that Shepard was certain she could bounce quarters off of. Her form was lithe otherwise and she had long dark hair and striking blue eyes to match her sharp high cheekbones and wide set jaw. She was the picture of perfection, or what someone had deemed perfection. Shepard wasn't impressed, because underneath all of that beauty was a short temper and a nasty attitude. Superiority complex at its finest. "That is just one of your many upgrades, Commander."

Shepard scowled. She had never showed signs of being a biotic. How could they have infused her system with the proper amount of Eezo without risking her life? Then she scoffed at her own question. These were the same people who had defied nature and brought her back from the dead. What was a little Eezo tainting? "I don't even know how to activate it," she said, glaring at Miranda for the blatant tinkering. She was meant to be brought back exactly as she was. How was making her a biotic exactly as she was?

Miranda sighed. "You will figure it out, Commander. If those poor L2s can figure it out, I have faith in your abilities. You have the most advanced amp implant money can buy."

At the mention of L2s, her heart clenched. Kaidan. She hoped he had found the strength to handle her death. He was such a sensitive touch. She glanced down at the omnitool that Miranda had given her once they'd taken off. Opening the interface, she found that other than her usual combat programs, she was blocked from the extranet. Were they really treating her like a child? With a sigh, she closed the interface and vowed to tinker her way through the firewalls when she got a free minute alone. _If_ she got a free minute alone. She did not trust any of these people.

They landed on the station and Shepard was directed down a flight of stairs. "The Illusive Man is waiting for you," Miranda said, crossing her arms and cocking her hip.

Time for some answers. She made her way down the indicated stairs to a dark room. As far as she could tell, it was empty. Frowning she stepped forward onto a large circle slightly raised in the middle of the floor. Her presence activated a scanning program. She glanced around, expecting an ambush. Instead, a holographic rendering of a man sitting in a chair appeared in front of her. She crossed her arms, taking in the image. He sat with confidence, one ankle perched on the opposite knee. A drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other. His eyes glowed with cybernetics, turning his pupils into a strange geometric design. He wore a simple suit and the entire facade was haloed by a large red and yellow star behind him. "Commander Shepard." He said, exhaling smoke.

"Illusive Man. I thought we'd be meeting face-to-face." Shepard let her suspicion ooze from her voice.

"A necessary precaution." He flicked the cherry from his cigarette in a small ashtray beside him. "Not unusual for people who know what you and I know."

"What exactly is it that you and I know?" she asked, her arms still crossed, wishing she could see him in person to get a better read on his mannerisms and facial expressions.

"That our place in the universe is more fragile than we'd like to think." Another drag from his cigarette before he continued. "That one woman. One very specific woman might be all that stands between humanity and the greatest threat to our existence."

Her blood chilled at his words. "The Reapers..."

"Good to see your memory's still intact. How are you feeling?" He asked, lightening his tone and putting out the cigarette.

"I noticed a few... upgrades," she spat wondering if she would get an explanation here. "I hope you didn't replace anything really important."

"We tried to keep you as intact as possible. We need Shepard. Just as you were when you defeated Sovereign," he said calmly.

"What are the Reapers doing that made you decide to bring me back?" What was his game? Why was she so special? She was just a soldier.

"We're at war." He stood and approached her, stopping outside her circle on the floor. "No one wants to believe it, but humanity is under attack. While you were asleep, entire colonies have been disappearing. Human colonies. We believe it's someone working for the Reapers, just as Saren and the geth aided Sovereign. You've seen it yourself. You bested all of them. That's just one reason we chose you."

She scoffed, "You could have trained an army for what you spent to bring me back."

"You are unique. Not just your ability, but what you experienced. What you represent. You stood for humanity in a key moment. You're more than a soldier. You're a symbol. And I don't know if the Reapers understand fear, but you killed one. They have to respect that."

"If what you say is true, if the Reapers are behind this, I'd _consider_ helping you." She was backed into a corner. She had no support and nobody familiar around to even talk this out with. She really missed Garrus.

"I'd be disappointed if you accepted any of this without seeing for yourself." He turned his back on her to pace back to his chair. "I have a shuttle waiting to take you to Freedom's Progress, the latest colony to be abducted. Miranda and Jacob will brief you."

"I'll get what you're looking for and be back before you know it," she said, ready to get this over with so she could take a breath and gather herself. She needed to decide how she was going to worm her way out of Cerberus' grasp.

"Good to hear it. Find any clues you can. Who's abducting the colonists? Do they have any connection to the Reapers? _I_ brought you back. It's up to you to do the rest." He reached over to a console beside his chair and disconnected the session.

"Quite the log off," she muttered, angry at his insinuation that he owned her. She turned and stomped back up the stairs to the room where Miranda and Jacob were waiting. "Let's get this over with," she grumbled, heading back toward the shuttle bay where they had come in.

Miranda and Jacob fell in behind her and she made it clear that she was the one giving the orders as they flew toward the nearby planet where until recently the colony Freedom's Progress had stood proud. They touched down at the edge of the colony. It was eerily quiet and empty. All of the Prefabs stood like statues, their inhabitants just gone. It was like visiting a museum where they would set up scenes to depict what colonial life looked like. They crossed through a few buildings to push further in with nothing to show. They came to a large door that separated the main colony from the outskirts and when Shepard opened the door, they were immediately fired upon. She had been ready for anything, but after the eerie desolation she had come to not expect signs of life. She panicked, adrenaline kicking in and she felt a strange burning sensation in the back of her head. When she looked down at her hands, stunned, they were outlined, along with the rest of her body, in a rippling blue barrier. The bullets instead of damaging her shields were bouncing off of her. Her body tingled and she just stared at her hands. "Commander!" Miranda shouted, breaking her out of her shock. She tore her eyes away from her hands and pulled out her pistol. Taking cover behind a stack of crates, she glanced around to see who was attacking them. More mechs. Wonderful.

She attempted to ignore the fuzzy feeling of her biotic barrier and fiddled with her omnitool. She brought up the overload and the program charged much quicker than she'd remembered. Smiling at the upgrade, she reached out from cover and shot the debilitating program at two mechs who had grouped together. Just as she moved to get back into cover, she saw some FENRIS mechs running toward her cover. Those bastards would take out her shields in an instant if she didn't do something. Judging she didn't have the time to overload them, she tried to aim her pistol, but they were on top of her. She cursed herself for not asking for a shotgun. She would remedy that later. She felt her biotics flare as her heart raced and she tried to figure out what to do. The field around her began to charge up and she grabbed a hold of the power. She could think of nothing else to do with it, so she reared back and punched the closest FENRIS in it's round mechanical puppy face. The power that had built shot out of her with surprising force, knocking back everything around her, and exploding all of the FENRIS mechs that had gathered. She couldn't take the time to be amazed. She got back into the action, taking cover when she realized that with the expense of power, her barrier had disappeared. She did still have her shields though. One or two bullets pecked at her, but she turned and took a few shots at the two remaining mechs across the complex. Once they were all dropped, she stood and holstered her pistol. Miranda jogged up to her and glanced around at the circumference of destruction that her biotics had released. "Congratulations, Commander. You figured it out. The application may have been a bit... brutish, but I have faith you will refine your skills with a bit of practice."

Shepard took the compliment, but stuck her tongue out at Miranda after she turned her back, drawing a short cock of the lips from Jacob. They proceeded forward, running into a few more mechs as they went. The biggest surprise, however, was the group of Quarians crouched around a broken console on the floor of one of the habitation units. When Shepard and her two Cerberus friends entered the room, guns at the ready, the Quarians stood up and confronted them, guns pointed at them as well. Shepard was stunned when a familiar purple hood bounced to the front of the group and held her hands up to stop the showdown. "Prazza! You said you'd let me handle this." When she turned her helmet toward Shepard, Shepard lowered her gun as the girl recognized her. "Wait! Shepard?!"

Shepard pushed Miranda's gun down and Jacob took the cue and lowered his as well. "I'm not taking any chances with Cerberus operatives!" one of the male Quarians shouted, his gun still pointed at Shepard.

"Put those weapons down!" Tali shouted and turned back to Shepard. "Shepard, is that... you're alive?" Awe and wariness flooded the mechanical voice.

Shepard knew just the thing to be certain Tali would trust her. She had to admit that it was probably suspicious. She was supposed to be dead after all. "Remember when I gave you that geth data, Tali? Did it help you complete your pilgrimage?"

"Yes, it did. Prazza, weapons down. This is definitely Commander Shepard."

"Why is your old commander working for Cerberus?" the male asked, holstering his shotgun.

"I don't know," Tali said, her own curiosity slipping into her voice to replace the shock of seeing Shepard alive. "Maybe we should ask." Her attention turned on Shepard again.

"I nearly died, Tali. Cerberus spent two years rebuilding me. They want me to investigate attacks on human colonies," Shepard explained.

The male cut off anything Tali might have said by crossing his arms, "Likely story. No organization would commit so many resources to bring back one soldier."

Tali must have smirked from the sound of her voice. "You haven't seen Shepard in action, Prazza. Trust me, it was money well spent." She turned back to Shepard again. "Perhaps we can work together. We're here looking for a young Quarian named Veetor. He was here on Pilgrimage."

"Isn't that a little strange? A Quarian visiting a remote human colony?" Shepard asked, trying to get all of the facts.

"Quarians can choose where they go on Pilgrimage. Veetor liked the idea of helping a small settlement. He was always... nervous in crowds," Tali explained her voice hesitant.

"She means that he was unstable," the male said. "Combine that with damage to his suit's CO2 scrubbers and an infection from an open-air exposure, and he's likely delirious."

"When he saw us landing, he hid in a warehouse on the far side of town. We suspect he also programmed the mechs to attack anything that moved," Tali said, her hands wringing in a familiar nervous tick.

Shepard allowed herself a small tight lipped smile. "Veetor's the only one who can tell us what happened here. We should work together to find him," she suggested.

"Good idea," Tali agreed. "You'll need two teams to get past the drones, anyway."

"Now we're working with Cerberus?!" Prazza protested.

"No, Prazza, you're working _for_ me. If you can't follow orders, go wait on the ship," Tali spat. The nervous little Quarian had come a long way in the last two years. Shepard was proud of her. She addressed Shepard again. "Head for the warehouse through the center of the colony. We'll circle around the far side and draw off some of the drones to clear you a path."

"Your people really don't like Cerberus. What did I miss?" Shepard asked, hoping to get a bit of insight from a reliable source.

Prazza explained. "They killed our people, infiltrated our flotilla, and tried to blow up one of our ships."

"That's not how I would have explained it exactly," Miranda piped up. "It was nothing personal."

"We can argue over who killed who later," Jacob added. "Right now, we've got a job to do."

"Agreed," Tali said. "We work together to get to Veetor."

"Make sure to keep in radio contact," Shepard sighed, dissatisfied with the lack of answers.

"Will do," Tali said. "Good luck, Shepard. Whatever happens, it's good to have you back." She twitched toward Shepard like she was going to hug her, but bounced back away with a calculating glance over her face. Her glowing pinprick eyes flickering as she looked for irregularities.

Shepard smiled at her before Tali and her team split off to do as she had said. Seeing the familiar mask had made Shepard feel a hell of a lot better about being back. They fought through the center of the complex, taking out drones that Tali was warning them about over the radio. Suddenly Shepard heard a string of Quarian curses that her translator wouldn't even touch. Tali then informed her that Prazza had disobeyed her orders and tried to get ahead to Veetor. They had gotten ambushed by a heavy mech that was destroying the unit. Shepard ordered her people into cover while Tali hacked open the garage door between them and the mech. When the door opened, Shepard moved into the open space. Luckily there were several stacks of crates off to the left of the clearing. Shepard scurried to take cover behind one of the stacks and ready her overload while the Quarians were massacred. There was nothing she could do to save them and her heart went out to Tali who she watched smartly run into a nearby building and lock herself in. Glad she was safe and Shepard didn't have to worry about her being hurt, she concentrated on the task at hand. Miranda and her both overloaded the Mech's shields, taking them down easily enough, but the heavy armor it was covered in was going to be a different story.

"Use your Warp field, Commander!" Miranda shouted as she leaned out and unloaded some rounds from her SMG into the approaching Mech.

Shepard frowned. "How the hell do I do that?" Shepard shouted back, looking at her hands.

She heard Miranda let out a sound of disgust before saying, "Search your system for the right nodules. Concentrate, Commander. Your brain will stimulate the proper ports if you can concentrate."

That was less than helpful, Shepard thought as she concentrated on activating her amp. "Go go gadget amp," she mumbled to herself as she felt the YMIR closing in on them. Finally her hands began to glow blue as the amp started to charge. She then thought the word Warp over and over, hoping that Miranda meant her brain thinking the right thing would make it do the right thing. When the tingly feeling reached a crescendo, she stood up out of cover and threw whatever biotic wonder she had charged. A small ball of energy shot from her palm and hit the mech. It shuddered like whatever she had done hurt it, then it turned toward her, its armor sparking. It drew its arm up and began firing on her. She jumped back behind the crates and chuckled at her apparent success. Biotics would take a lot of getting used to, but if she could get them to work right, they seemed awfully useful. They continued to distract the mech by drawing its fire between the three of them until they were finally able to take it down. "It's gonna blow!" Shepard warned, just as the shuddering mech sparked and caught fire.

After the thing was no more than bits of scattered debris, they came out of cover and headed toward the warehouse where Veetor had to be hiding. "Good job with the Warp Field," Jacob said before the door opened.

Shepard allowed herself to smile a thank you as she stepped into the dark room. A Quarian sat in a chair in front of what looked like a security terminal. There were multiple screens showing multiple readouts of everything going on around him. He was mumbling to himself. "Monsters coming back. Mechs will protect. Safe from Swarms. Have to hide. No monsters. No swarms. No-no-no-no-no."

"Veetor?" she asked softly, recognizing that the Quarian was unstable.

"No Veetor. Not here. Swarms can't find. Monsters coming. Have to hide."

Shepard stepped closer and said in the same soothing voice, "Nobody's going to hurt you anymore."

The Quarian did not answer that time. He simply typed frantically on the interface in front of him, his full attention on the task at hand. "I don't think he can hear you, Commander," Jacob said, his voice low.

Shepard pulled up her omnitool and ran an override program, shutting down all of the screens in front of Veetor, drawing his attention. The Quarian stood up and turned to face them, seeing them for the first time. "You're human. Where did you hide? How come they didn't find you?"

"Who didn't find us?" Miranda asked forcefully.

"The... the monsters. The Swarms. They took everyone."

"Why didn't the colonists fight back, Veetor? What happened?" Shepard asked gently, shooting Miranda an irritated look at her brash attitude.

"You don't know. You didn't see. But I see everything." He turned back to his console and brought up a clip of security footage that displayed as one big image across all the screens.

"Looks like security footage. He must've pieced it together manually," Miranda stepped closer to get a better look.

"What the hell is that?" Jacob asked pointing out a creature walking around a corner.

Shepard squinted, trying to make out the fuzzy image. "My god," Miranda said. "I think it's a Collector."

The name rang a bell with Shepard. She'd never seen one in person before, though. "I thought the Collectors kept to themselves," she mused.

"They usually work through intermediaries, like slavers or hired mercenaries. If they're involved with the Reapers somehow, it could explain what happened to the colonies," Miranda pointed out.

"The Collectors have advanced technology. They could have a weapon that disables an entire settlement at once," Jacob added.

Shepard's thoughts were interrupted by Veetor. "The Seeker Swarms. No one can hide. The Seekers find you. Freeze you. Then the monsters take you away."

"What happened next?" she asked him.

"The monsters took the people onto the ship, and then they left. The ship flew away, but they'll be back for me. No one escapes!" Shepard sensed the situation beginning to disintegrate.

Jacob must have sensed it too because he said, "I think that's all we're getting out of him, Commander."

"We appreciate what you told us," Shepard said calmly to Veetor. "You were very helpful."

Veetor took to her words, offering something else. "I studied them. The monsters. The swarms. I recorded them with my omnitool. Lots of readings. Electro-magnetic. Dark energy."

"We need to get this data to the Illusive Man," Miranda said as Tali walked in. "Grab the Quarian and call the shuttle to come pick us up."

Shepard clenched her fists. Veetor had helped them and Miranda was suggesting kidnapping. She was about to protest when Tali spoke up. "What? Veetor is injured! He needs treatment, not an interrogation!"

"We won't hurt him," Jacob assured her. "We just need to see if he knows anything else. He'll be returned unharmed."

"Your people tried to betray us once already. If we give him to you, we'll never get the intel we need," Miranda scowled.

"Prazza was an idiot, and he and his men paid for it!" Tali spat back. Then she turned her helmet toward Shepard, finally including her in the argument. "You're welcome to take Veetor's omnitool data, but please, just let me take him."

"You don't have to take Veetor and go," Shepard said almost desperately. "We could work together. Just like old times."

Tali sighed, her hands wringing together. "I want to, but I can't. I've got a mission of my own. It's too important for me to abandon, even for you." Shepard was sorry to hear it, ready to welcome the familiar face, but she understood. As far as anyone had known up until a few hours ago, she'd been dead. Her friends had their own lives now. "When it's over, and I'm still alive, we'll see what happens."

Shepard turned to Miranda and dropped her order without a second thought. "He's traumatized and he needs medical care. Tali will give us the omnitool data and take him to the flotilla."

"Understood, Commander," Miranda said, her voice dripping with anger.

"Thank you, Shepard. I'm glad you're still the one giving the orders," Tali said, her glowing eyes narrowing as she looked past Shepard to glare at Miranda. "Good luck out there. If I find anything that can help you, I'll let you know."

"We're ready for pickup," Jacob said over the comm, signaling the shuttle.

* * *

 

The ride back to the station was filled with tension. After Miranda had typed her report to the Illusive Man on her omnitool and sent it off, she sat with her arms and legs crossed glaring out the window of the shuttle. Shepard didn't care. The faster Miranda learned she wasn't in charge, the better she and Shepard would get along.

When they returned to the docking bay, Shepard got out of the shuttle and headed straight for the small room with the holo-communicator. She had words to say to the Illusive Man. He shimmered into existence before her and broke the silence eagerly. "Shepard! Good work on Freedom's Progress. The Quarians forwarded their findings from Veetor's debriefing. No new data, but it's a surprising olive branch, given our history. You and I have different methods, but I can't argue with your results."

Shepard crossed her arms smugly. "You ever think about playing nice once in a while?"

"Diplomacy is great when it works, but difficult when everyone already perceives you as a threat, but more importantly, you confirmed the Collectors are behind the abductions."

"Why do I get the feeling you knew about them already?"

"I had my suspicions, but I needed proof," he confirmed, nodding. "The Collectors are enigmatic at best. They periodically travel to the Terminus systems, looking to gather seemingly unimportant items or specimens, usually in exchange for their technology. When the transactions are complete they disappear as quickly as they arrived, back beyond the unmapped Omega 4 Relay. Until now, we've had no evidence of direct aggression by the Collectors."

"You're holding something back," Shepard accused, reading the simple tells that he was giving her. "How do you know the Reapers are involved?"

"The patterns are there, buried in the data," he said simply. "The Council and the Alliance want to believe the Reaper threat died with Sovereign. You and I know better. I won't wait until the Reapers are on the march. I want to take the fight to them."

"If this is a war, I'll need an army," Shepard pointed out, realizing her distaste for Cerberus was overshadowed by the severity of the situation. Someone had to do something and even before she had died, the Council and the Alliance were brushing the threat under the carpet. "Or a really good team."

He smiled, bringing up an interface beside him and initiating a data transfer as if he'd known she would agree to working with him. Or in his eyes, _for_ him. "I've already compiled a list of soldiers, scientists and mercenaries. You'll get dossiers on the best of them. Finding them and convincing them to work with you would be challenging, but you're a natural leader. I'll continue to track the Collectors. When they make their next appearance, I'll notify you and your team. Be ready."

Shepard held up a hand. This was her chance. "Keep your list. I want people I trust. The ones who helped me stop Saren and the geth."

The Illusive Man sat forward, challenging her request. "That was two years ago, Commander. Most of them have moved on, or their allegiances have changed."

"Where's Kaidan Alenko?" Shepard asked, her heart rate increasing. If she couldn't have her people, she at least wanted to know where they were so she might contact them.

"He's still with the Alliance. Promoted, I believe. His file is surprisingly well classified."

"Where's Garrus Vakarian?" She asked a little more forcefully, getting upset with the lack of information on Kaidan.

"The Turian disappeared a few months after you were declared dead. Even we haven't been able to locate him."

Shepard clenched her fists and had to force her anger down before her amp decided to throw something at his holographic face. "Where's Liara T'Soni?" she asked through gritted teeth.

"She's on Illium. My sources say she's working for the Shadow Broker. If so, she can't be trusted."

He was systematically removing all of her friends from her grasp. "Where's Urdnot Wrex?"

"He returned to Tuchanka, and he hasn't gone off-world in over a year. He's trying to unite the Krogan clans."

Shepard at least knew that was true. Wrex had told her so himself before leaving. In a last ditch effort, she said, "What about Tali? She already helped us back on Freedom's Progress."

"That was unexpected. I need more intel before I'll commit to that."

Shepard sighed. "Okay, I get it. They're not available."

"You're a leader, Shepard. You'll get who you need," he assured her.

"I'm still a SPECTRE. Maybe I can get the Council to help us out."

"If you think you can convince them," he said, shifting in his seat. "By all means. Just remember you've been gone a long time."

"You worry about the Collectors. I'll make sure my team's ready." Shepard crossed her arms again.

"Good. Two more things before you go. First, head to Omega and find Mordin Solus. He's a brilliant Salarian scientist. Our intelligence suggests he may know how to counteract the Collector's paralyzing Seeker Swarms."

"I haven't even started and you're telling me what to do?" Shepard asked, completely unsurprised that he had the nerve.

"I'm giving you direction," he corrected. "What you do with it is up to you. I'm sure you'll make the right decision."

"Alright, what's the other thing?" Shepard asked, certain he would have some other terrible stipulation to throw at her last minute. Not five minutes into their alliance and he was already infuriating her.

"I've found a Pilot I think you might like. I hear he's one of the best. Someone you can trust."

The Illusive Man shut down the call with nothing further. She sighed, wondering what puffed up fly boy he was sending her way. She was about to turn and go when she heard the most welcome voice she had heard yet. "Hey, Commander! Just like old times, huh?"

She spun and smiled as Joker stepped into the light. He was sporting a Cerberus issued uniform and his SR1 ball cap had been replaced by a new one. He returned her smile as she approached him, almost hugging him.

"I can't believe it's you, Joker," she said, still grinning as they started off, him in the lead.

"Look who's talking. I saw you get spaced." He replied, limping up a short set of stairs.

She chuckled. "Got lucky, with a lot of strings attached. How'd you get here?"

"It all fell apart without you, Commander. Everything you stirred up, the Council just wanted it gone. The team was broken up, records sealed, and I was grounded. The Alliance took away the one thing that mattered to me. Hell yeah, I joined Cerberus."

"You really trust the Illusive Man?" she asked stopping beside him in front of a massive observation window.

"I don't trust anyone who makes more than I do, but they aren't all bad. Saved your life, let me fly... and there's this." He pushed a button beside him and the lights on the other side of the window all started to come on one by one. "They only told me last night." The lights revealed a huge ship at least twice the size of her old Normandy. Along the side, it read SR2, just like Joker's new hat. She couldn't hold back her surprised grin. If they were going to bribe her to keep her on their side, they were sure doing it right. The shiny, outer hull looked bare as Joker said, "It's good to be home, huh, Commander?"

She put her hands on her hips and said, "I guess we'll have to give her a name."

Joker nodded emphatically as they both stared in awe at the beautifully remodeled Normandy.

 


	11. Something Old and Something New

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Grudgingly agreeing to help Cerberus, Shepard goes recruiting.

Just a few hours later, Shepard had been given a stupid uniform to match Joker's. It chafed on her skin and she felt the need to rip off the Cerberus patches covering it. In spite of her physical discomfort and the need for a shower, she was standing in the CIC of the brand new ship. It was brighter than she remembered, with shiny white paneling that replaced the usual chrome in the original Normandy. Most of the crew sported the same uniforms, but their faces were all unfamiliar.

"Welcome aboard the new Normandy, Commander," Jacob said, dogging her heels as she surveyed the wide open space.

Miranda was not far behind. She didn't waste a moment to allow Shepard to get acclimated before parroting the Illusive Man's words, "I've been looking over the Dossiers. I'd strongly recommend starting by acquiring Mordin Solus, the Salarian professor on Omega. We know the Collectors use some type of advanced technology to immobilize their victims. We'll need him to develop a countermeasure to protect us."

"Without that countermeasure we'll be helpless if we ever run into the Collectors," she agreed, having understood the need even when the Illusive Man had suggested it.

A metallic simulated female voice spoke over the comm speakers. "Acquiring Professor Solus seems like the most logical place to start."

Shepard looked up at the ceiling, placing the speakers and squinting. Wonderful someone else to try to run her ship. "Who are you?"

A small flickering sound behind her, drew her attention. Hovering above a console was an orb that when it spoke had a darkening of pixelation like sound-waves on a soundboard, rising and falling with its voice. "I am the Normandy's Artificial Intelligence. The crew like to refer to me as EDI."

Shepard crossed her arms at the words 'Artificial Intelligence'. "Helmsmen aren't happy when someone takes control of the ship away from them. Especially Joker." She pointed out, suddenly feeling uneasy in the fancy new Normandy. AI's were dangerous.

"I do not helm the ship. Mr. Moreau's talents will not go to waste. During combat I operate the electronic warfare and cyberwarfare suites. Beyond that, I cannot interface with the ship. I observe and offer analysis and advice. Nothing more." The AI closed down it's orb as if insulted. It was just something else to 'observe' her that she didn't trust.

Shepard sighed. She felt like that was going to turn out to be her new go to emote. "I suppose it takes more than the three of us plus Joker to fly this ship?"

"The Normandy has a full crew. They're at their stations awaiting your orders." Miranda informed her.

Joker spoke over the speakers. "Final preparations for take off are complete, Commander. When you're ready to go, just pick a destination from the galaxy map in the CIC and I'll plot a course." At least that was something normal. This Normandy operated just like the SR1.

"Jacob and I should return to our posts. Come find us if you have any questions." Miranda stalked off, gliding like the graceful hunter she seemed to be. Jacob shot her a salute before heading off in the opposite direction.

Shepard stood in the center of the CIC feeling just a little bit overwhelmed. Mere hours ago, she had been dead, now she was back on the Normandy, correction _a_ Normandy, and back in the fight against the Reapers. Nothing felt right. In spite of Joker being there, she felt out of place. She didn't know any of this crew and it made her uneasy. She ran fingers through her hair and knew she needed a shower. Goodness knew when the last time was she'd been cleaned. She'd woken from her coma and jumped right into armor. In spite of feeling grimy, she made her way back up to the bridge. Joker was there to greet her with his usual upbeat charisma. "Can you believe this, Commander?! It's my baby, Better than new!" He went on to gush about the leather seats and his comfort levels. EDI interrupted by saying that the replication was not intended to be perfect. "Aaaand there's the downside. I liked the Normandy when she was beautiful and quiet." he grumbled.

Shepard chuckled, covering her own unease with the AI by saying, "If we're stuck here, we might as well enjoy it."

"Does it break uniform regs if I get that on a t shirt? Because this is my favorite 'you have no choice' choice ever." he quipped.

"Technically, this is a civilian ship," she pointed out. "I'm probably lucky you're still wearing pants."

He grinned and spun his chair around. "I'll save that for the off camera hours."

She walked away to him mumbling about the AI watching him 24/7 and something about ship cancer. She shook her head and walked back to the CIC, passing by some of the crew on her way. She smiled as openly as possible in case they wanted to get to know her. She liked knowing the people she worked with. Most of them wouldn't approach her though. They just stared in awe or whispered to each other. When she approached the Galaxy map to get Joker headed to Omega, a sweet and bubbly red head standing at a console beside her station introduced herself as Yeoman Kelly Chambers. She explained her duties and revealed that she was not only Shepard's secretary, but she was the ship's resident psychologist. She was there to help anyone on a personal level that might need it. Shepard gently pretended that she would come to her if there were something bothering her, but she had no intention of doing so. After Kelly went back to her console where it looked like she was reading some of the Dossiers that the Illusive Man had sent over, Shepard approached the galaxy map and the familiar interfacing system. She ran her fingers thorough the visually beautiful galaxy. She tapped the appropriate system where she knew the Omega space station was located and sent the coordinates forward to Joker's station. "Just like riding a bike," she said to herself, earning a glance and sweet smile from Kelly. After she had set their course, Shepard turned and faced the elevator. She narrowed her eyes at the shiny doors and crossed her arms. "We meet again, old friend. Has Cerberus managed to upgrade you too?" She childishly taunted the elevator. She stepped in, automatically selecting the crew deck without even looking at the 4 other buttons and where they led. She was feeling fatigued and just wanted to retire to her cabin and get a shower. The elevator dropped her, quicker than she thought possible, in a narrow hallway. There were four directions to go and it reminded her of the original Normandy except the two directions that had originally led upwards to the CIC now led straight to communal men's and women's bathrooms on either side, two large observational decks on the port and starboard sides and life support and crew's quarters on opposite sides. Each door was helpfully labeled and Shepard decided to take the time later to explore. She went around the back of the elevator that, just as before, led straight to the mess hall. The kitchenette in this Normandy was quite a bit larger than the original and there was a crew member standing beside the refrigerator taking inventory. She glanced where the med bay used to be and sure enough the doorway read "Med Bay". She was about to head to where her quarters should have been when she spotted someone through the Med bay windows.

She found herself jogging over to the med bay to greet her old friend. When the doors opened and the woman looked up, she graced Shepard with a beautiful smile. "Commander Shepard. I watched the Normandy crumble with you on board. I'm glad to see you in one piece." The woman's grey eyes were moving up and down Shepard's body, doing a silent examination.

"Dr. Chakwas! What are you doing here?" Shepard asked, her relief at another familiar face lifting her spirits.

The doctor explained in her English accent how she had been grounded along with Joker and that colony life was boring and being on a ship was the only life for her. Shepard found herself getting lost in the older woman's voice as they spoke, catching up. Chakwas mentioned her disappointment at the loss of a very expensive bottle of Brandy that had gone down with the Normandy and without a second thought, Shepard promised her a new bottle. She left the med bay feeling much better, but as she made her way across the mess, she started to realize how seeing Chakwas and Joker was making her miss her other companions.

She mindlessly opened the door where her old cabin had been and was surprised to see Miranda sitting at a desk. She frowned when Miranda looked up and the expression was returned. "Shepard, is there something you needed?"

She glanced up at the helpful sign above the door and flushed at her mistake. "I'm sorry Miranda. I guess I am a little too used to the layout of the original Normandy. My cabin used to be here."

For the first time that Shepard could remember, a genuine smile crossed over Miranda's face. It lit up her features and brought out the beauty that was meant to shine through her modifications. "That's quite alright, Commander. While you're here, is there anything I can help you with?"

Shepard bit her lip at the unusual helpfulness from the usually crass woman. If they were going to work together, Shepard knew she was going to need to get to know her people, just as she had with the original Normandy crew. Having caught Miranda in a seemingly good mood, she stepped into the room and took the offered seat across the desk. Miranda spoke passionately about Cerberus and answered every question she could, even chuckling when Shepard asked about her personally. "I suppose that's fair. I spent the last two years learning everything there is to know about you."

Shepard left Miranda's quarters with a lot to think about. She made her way back to the elevator and pressed the button labeled Captain's Quarters. She apparently had an entire floor to herself. The elevator zoomed up and Shepard rivaled again at the major speed upgrade that the thing had received under Cerberus' care. She stepped out into a small entryway with an unlocked door slightly to the left. She touched the interface, opening the door and stepped inside. The room was nothing short of magnificent. Twice the size of her original quarters, half of the left wall was taken over by a giant fish tank. The blue glow of the tank lit the otherwise dim room. To her right stood a wrap around desk cut off from the rest of the room by a few steps down. Behind the desk was a bathroom with a large stand up shower and private toilet. Shepard ignored the bathroom temporarily to explore the rest of the room. At the bottom of the two stairs and to the right was a large L shaped sofa that had a glass coffee table snugly fitted into the square space in the middle of it. The back of the room housed the bed, a few night stands and an in wall electronic dresser/armor fabrication unit. Beside that was a laundry chute. How fancy of them.

Shepard fiddled with the dresser, figuring out how to customize her settings and found that Cerberus had not only recovered her body, but they had even gone so far as to creepily get a hold of a lot of her old clothes and underwear. She found her favorite N7 hoodie and cargo pants which she paired with a white t shirt. She lifted the favored hoodie from the dresser and held it to her face, inhaling the scent. It even still held the scent she had always loved. Shepard refused to question the small bits of strange that kept cropping up. They had spent billions to bring her back and Miranda had said she knew everything about her. That included her favorite soap and shampoo. Shepard undressed fully for the first time since waking up and saw why her body had been constantly aching. She was covered in hairline scars, some deeper than others. She prodded one close to her ribs and saw that a strange orange glow was coming from the marks. She tried to ignore it in favor of a shower. The water ran from the shower-head scalding hot and she stepped in, letting the water burn. She felt like she was scrubbing the wrong from her skin. She still didn't feel like herself, in spite of her memories and what everyone was telling her. She wasn't sure how long she stood under the hot stream of water, but she managed to soap up her body and her hair and get rid of the dirt and grime. Oddly enough no matter how much she scrubbed over the rips in her skin, they did not come open. That was definitely a question she would need an answer to from Chakwas. She needed to understand her new body if she was ever going to feel at home in it.

When the water turned on her, she stepped out and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around her. Taking a deep breath, she turned around and glanced in the mirror above her sink. Wiping the steam from the mirror with a perfectly manicured hand, which even _that_ was strange to her, she saw her reflection for the first time. The thing looking back at her refused to register as familiar. It was like looking at at stranger. She recognized her short cropped red hair and vivid green eyes, but they were peeking out from between angry glowing scars just like the ones covering her body. Shepard felt the room spinning and gripped the sink to keep her balance. The shock of seeing herself in such a state had her heart racing. She gulped in breaths of air and panicked. Would these marks heal or would they be permanent? How had anyone recognized her? Joker and Chakwas had not even blinked when they looked at her. Cybernetics shone through her skin, marking her as they had marked Saren. _Meat and tubes_ she thought, remembering Jacob's words when they had met. How much of her was really her? She forced herself to look harder. Her freckles were gone. The scar she had carried from her childhood above her eye had disappeared to be replaced with a perfect eyebrow. She looked down at her shoulder where she had previously had a scar from when she'd been shot on Therum. That scar was gone, too. All of her familiar marks that had made her who she was had been replaced with perfect replications that hid her imperfections. She even swore that her breasts felt like they might have gained a size. She caught herself squeezing the offending attachments to be certain. They sure felt larger to her.

She took one last look at the marks on her face and shoved her feelings down deep. Whether or not she was really her would come to light sooner or later. Now she needed a nap. She slipped into her comfortable familiar clothes, picked up the Cerberus uniform up with two fingers and tossed it down the laundry chute, glad to be rid of it. She approached the bed, poking at the mattress with a finger. It looked a lot softer than it felt. She lowered herself down on it and after lying down on her back, she realized just how much autopilot she had been running on when she noticed the skylight.

Shepard gripped the blankets, feeling the world pressing down on her chest as she stared out the large opening in the ceiling. Space flew by at FTL speed and she panicked, her last moments coming back to her in vivid detail. She scrambled up from the bed, and jumped up on the couch, tucking her feet up underneath her, breathing heavily. There was no way she would be able to sleep under that wide open chasm. When her panic subsided, she padded back toward the bed, grabbed the blanket, careful not to pass under the window and went back to the couch. Wrapping herself in the blanket, she huddled on the narrow couch and slowly dozed into a fitful sleep.

* * *

 

_She was sitting in a park on the Presidium. She was wearing a white sundress printed with flowers. A breeze tossed her hair and she frowned, realizing that there were no breezes on the Citadel. She glanced around again and she was outside of an old ramshackle barn, sitting on a picnic blanket on the grass. A man approached her. She smiled at him. Nathan Bellinski. He pulled her to her feet and his lips were soft when he kissed her. She fell into the kiss, running her hands through his hair, but then it wasn't hair. She pulled away from him when he kissed her so hard her lips bled. She shoved him off of her, touching a shaking hand to her lips. When she looked up, a Batarian was grinning back at her with sharp teeth, his four eyes blinking out of sync as he leered at her. A knife was in her hands. She lashed out, stabbing for his gut. She looked down at her hands, covered in sticky red blood. It dripped over her fingers and she looked up. Fear gripped her stomach as she realized her mistake. "Oh god! Oh no, Kaidan." She touched her bloodied fingers to his face, smearing his cheek with the mess. "You're not you anymore," he choked, betrayal in his eyes. He coughed and blood speckled her face, replacing the freckles she had lost. She flinched at the accusation. He fell, lifeless at her feet and the Illusive Man appeared at her back. "Just as I predicted. Nice work, Shepard." She looked down at the blood on her hands and arms and saw the scars marring her perfect skin. Hideous orange cybernetics glowed through her flesh. "I'm not me anymore." The Illusive Man patted her shoulder like a proud father._

* * *

 

Shepard woke with a start, sweat pouring from her skin. Was it really her skin? She shook off the terrible thought and dug the heels of her hands into her eye sockets. She got up from the couch feeling extremely vulnerable in what was supposed to be her private space. She went to her desk and sat down in front of her terminal. Running her hands through her hair, she pulled up the interface on her omnitool. Apparently since she had agreed to work with them, Cerberus had deemed her worthy of extranet access. She signed into her old Alliance account and smiled when she came across the messages from her friends that she had received from just before her accident. She had a silly photo of each of them beside their names and suddenly she had an idea. She pulled up Kaidan's picture and enlarged it. Swiping her finger to transfer it to a blank data pad on the desk, she propped the photo up so every time she glanced to the right, Kaidan was smiling at her.

The small piece of home made her feel a little bit better about her dream. Checking the time she realized she had hours before they would reach Omega. She picked up the stack of data pads on the desk and started to read up on the people she was going to have to convince to work with her. It had been so much easier with her old crew. They had all come together for a singular purpose. Convincing strangers who had no personal investment in the fight for humanity was going to be a challenge.

_Dr. Mordin Solus_

_Biological weapons expert- Light weapons training with Salarian Special Tasks Group._

_Dr. Mordin Solus is a Salarian biological weapons expert whose technology may hold the key to countering Collector attacks. He is currently operating a medical clinic in the slums of Omega._

"Very informative," Shepard sighed, wondering if all of the dossiers would be so vague. She set the pile down and read over Mordin's again. Then she used her extranet terminal to do a bit of research on Special Tasks Group and on Mordin himself. Not much was to be found. She dropped Mordin's dossier and picked up the next one.

_Zaeed Massani_

_Expert in both personal and small unit combat- Unparalleled mercenary, soldier and bounty hunter- known for a willingness to get the job done, no matter the cost._

_Zaeed Massani is, without a doubt, the most feared mercenary and bounty hunter in the galaxy. His services have been retained by Cerberus at extremely high cost. He is currently awaiting pickup on Omega._

Another pickup on Omega. At least she could kill two birds with one stone. If this Massani was already paid, she needn't worry about convincing him to follow her. Most mercs were in it for the money. She wasn't thrilled to hear that she was buying loyalty, though. With another sigh, she picked up the next data pad.

_Archangel_

_Small-unit tactical expertise- Omnitool expert and noted sniper._

_Archangel is a mercenary commander whose operations are noted for their technical expertise and strategic brilliance. He is responsible for high-profile attacks on gang leaders on Omega and can likely be found there._

Three birds with one stone, apparently. Omega had a reputation for being a hell hole of a station and Shepard was wondering where the Illusive Man was finding these so called 'best' in their fields. If she thought those were bad, she was not prepared for what was next.

_Jack (no last name known)_

_Exceptional biotic ability- Note: Criminal background, currently in custody._

_Jack is rumored to be the most powerful human biotic ever encountered. Very little additional data regarding Jack is available, except that the subject has a history of violence and should be approached carefully. Currently, Jack is being held on the Turian prison ship Purgatory. Cerberus has negotiated for the prisoner's release._

A violent criminal? She was really getting the bottom of the barrel on the morality scope.

_Dr. Okeer_

_Millennia of combat and strategic experience- Rumored familiarity with Collector technology._

_A brilliant and brutal Krogan warlord who fought in the krogan Rebellions, Dr. Okeer has become obsessed with saving the Krogan people from the genophage and is believed to have contacted the Collectors in an attempt to gain technology to that end. He is currently in a Blue Suns camp on Korlus, though the nature of his relationship with the mercenary group is unknown._

More mercs. She wished she had more information on Okeer himself, but she had no way of contacting Wrex. She would have loved to know if her friend knew anything. The last dossier she had was for a tech expert.

_Kasumi Goto_

_Master of stealth and infiltration- Skilled hacker and information specialist- Operates completely off the grid.- No criminal record._

_Kasumi Goto is not the most famous thief in the galaxy- she's the best. Trained in the arts of stealth and infiltration, she had 'acquired' artifacts and information from all over the galaxy and yet maintains a completely clean criminal record. She is awaiting rendezvous with Shepard on the Citadel, in the Zakera Ward._

Shepard stacked the data pads on top of each other again and wondered just how difficult the next few months of her life would be. She got up and paced for a bit, avoiding the open area at the back of her quarters and trying not to bite her nails. She hadn't had such long nails since she'd joined the Alliance. She had kept them short because of the nasty habit she'd picked up after Mindoir. When that wasn't helping, she dug through her desk drawers. Much to her surprise, there was an unopened model ship box in the top drawer. She took the box from the drawer and excitedly opened it. She hadn't put together a model ship since she was a child. It had been something her and her father had done together. She carefully dumped the contents on the desk and pulled out the directions. "It's the Normandy!" she gasped, unfolding the paper to get a look at the finished model.

Shepard set to work, removing the pieces from each other and assembling the ship. It took her a few hours while she carefully followed each step, sure to get everything in its proper place. She forgot everything while she concentrated on the delicate work. Once it was finished and the paint was drying, she pushed her chair back and admired her work. It was a perfect replica of the SR2.

"Commander Shepard, we are approaching the Omega space station," EDI's sultry mechanical voice interrupted her thoughts, startling her a bit.

"Thanks, EDI," she said, swallowing her heart that had jumped into her throat.

She stood and made her way carefully over to the fancy dresser, avoiding the skylight and fiddled with the settings to get her armor pieces put together properly. She settled for flat black with her usual N7 stripe down the right arm. The machine gave her an option to add a pattern to her armor. Subconsciously she threw some stripes that crossed her chest and chose a color blue that was familiar to her. Looking at it made her smile and she could not figure out why. Configuring the upgrades she wanted, she tapped the finished button and the dresser unlocked to slide out three drawers with all of her armor pieces inside, colored and fitted with her upgrades. Impressed with the technology, she changed into her under armor and snapped all of the plates in place. When she was finished, she headed down to the armory which she remembered was on the CIC deck. She stepped out of the elevator and took a left turn toward the doors. When they opened, Shepard saw Jacob checking his pistol and SMG to be certain they were up to snuff.

He was wearing the thin Cerberus body armor she had met him in and he looked her up and down to take in her new armor. "Lookin' good, Shepard," he grinned and picked up a pistol. He tossed the unloaded weapon to her. She caught it and he said, "I read in your file you like pistols and shotguns. You're an up close and personal fighter."

She heard the innuendo in his voice and was not certain if she was going to laugh or scold him for insubordination. She had yet to have a one on one with him like she had managed to have with Miranda. It was difficult to read him. She settled on ignoring it. "Sure, but I think I'll keep this thing handy," she said picking up the grenade launcher she'd acquired at the Lazarus station.

"Can't fault you for that," he said, picking up on her decision to ignore his advance and toning it down.

She checked the chamber and found it fully loaded. She magnetized it to her back, testing whether the suit would hold its weight. Thankful her other upgrades had not messed with that feature of her new armor, she grabbed up a shotgun and fiddled with some mods, wishing Garrus had been there to mod her things. He was great at weapon mods. With a sigh, she chose a clip upgrade and a power boost.

* * *

 

Omega smelled like an auto shop mixed with filth and unwashed bodies. Shepard wrinkled her nose as they walked down the dock from the Normandy. They were approached by more than a few vagrants that were shooed away by a snarling Batarian. Shepard tensed, as the Batarian addressed her. He informed her that she needed to report to the local club Afterlife and present herself to Aria T'Loak, the apparent leader of Omega. Shepard let out a breath as the Batarian left. EDI spoke to her through her comm, informing her that Aria may have information on both Dr. Solus and Archangel. Shepard wondered about Zaeed Massani until they came upon a man in a mercenary outfit kicking the mess out of a cowering Batarian. She was about to ignore the situation when the man looked up at her. His face was a mess of scars on the right side, his right eye obviously blind. He had tattoos on every bit of skin she could see from the neck down and his thinning hair was shorn close to his head. "You Commander Shepard?" He asked her in a thick Cockney accent, kicking the Batarian again.

She crossed her arms. "If you know me, then you must be Zaeed Massani."

"That'd be me. Cerberus paid me quite a bit to follow you around and be a goddamn hero." He said truthfully.

"So you've been briefed on the mission?" She asked as he dragged the Batarian to his feet.

"I know what I need to. Cerberus gave me a tip about some people in trouble because of an old colleague of mine. They thought you might like to help me out in saving them before we take on our big mission."

Shepard frowned, not certain she was glad that Cerberus was volunteering her for missions outside her scope, but if it would help her earn trust instead of buying it, she would do what she had to. "I guess I can help with that."

"Great. I'm gonna go turn this thing in and I'll be locked and loaded next time you need me," He said, walking away and dragging the Batarian behind him.

"Interesting fellow," Shepard quipped as she watched him go.

Her next stop was Afterlife to see if Aria did indeed know anything about her other two targets. The club noise thumped in her head as she passed though the main area. There were pixelated flames flickering all over screens everywhere, probably simulating hell, throwing an eerie red glow on everything. Shepard walked slowly through the place, taking in the sights of the dancing girls on the stages and the mixture of people and races enjoying their lives. It felt like forever since she'd had shore leave. She glanced at the listing of beverages they offered and noticed they had the brandy that Dr. Chakwas had mentioned. She asked Jacob and Miranda to wait while she approached the bar. For an exorbitant amount, the bartender agreed to have a full unopened bottle sent to the cargo bay of the Normandy. She rejoined Miranda and Jacob and they approached the dais where an Asari sat on an over sized couch surrounded by both Batarian and Turian guards.

"That's close enough," the Asari said in a sultry voice. The color of her skin was muddied by the poor lighting, but the woman was beautiful. Her features marked her as much older than Liara, but not yet in her matriarch days. The marks on her skin looked almost like tattoos and they were all sharp lines and points. Nothing marked the Asari as soft. Even her clothing screamed 'badass'.

With a nod of her head, a Batarian approached Shepard, holding up his omnitool and said, "Hold still."

She grabbed him by his collar and pulled his face inches from hers. "Try it and you'll be scanning the inside of your colon."

The Asari smiled and even her chuckle oozed sex. "I'd almost pay to see that, but you can't be too careful with dead SPECTREs. It could be anyone walking around with your face."

Shepard allowed the scan and introductions were made. "I _am_ Omega," was the phrase tossed around. _Queen if you're feeling dramatic._ Aria offered Shepard a seat on her couch and they chatted about both Solus and Archangel. As Aria explained the situation with Archangel, Shepard rethought her intention to acquire the Professor first. She thanked Aria and made her way down stairs to where Aria had indicated that the numerous merc groups on Omega had set up a recruitment station. "We agreed to pick up the Professor first," Miranda protested when she realized where Shepard was going.

Shepard turned on her. "That was before we knew that every major merc group on Omega had backed Archangel into a corner under a united banner. If we don't move fast, we'll be short a sniper!"

Miranda sneered, all trace of their amiable conversation the previous day gone. "Of course, Commander."

Shepard continued to the back room where the mercs had set up. When she entered, a Batarian taking names looked her up and down and grinned. "Well, aren't you sweet. You're in the wrong place, honey. Strippers quarters are that way." He pointed back out the door.

Shepard was feeling grumpy after Miranda questioning her judgement and she pulled out her pistol. "Show me yours tough guy, I bet mines bigger," she said, turning the weapon over in her hand and caressing it with the other.

"Impressive! So you're here to fight then?" he asked, backing down.

"Sure, if this is the place to go after Archangel," she put her gun away and crossed her arms, listening to the spiel about their pay and where to go after they were signed up. When she turned to leave the young boy coming in after her looked like he was barely 17. He was talking loudly and brandishing a pistol that he probably didn't know how to use. His innocence and what Omega had done to him pissed her off even more. She grabbed his gun from him and popped the thermal clip out. "Trust me kid, you'll thank me later." She said, returning the useless gun back to him.

They made their way toward the taxi landing where the Batarian had told them to go. Miranda commented on Omega being a piss hole and that she always felt like she needed a shower afterwards on top of normal decontamination. Shepard had to agree. Omega was a nasty place.

* * *

 

Shepard had been gone for two years. Two years and 13 days to be exact. He had been on Omega for nearly all of that time, building his own dream team. They had done good for a while, messing with the merc groups and disrupting a lot of the crime on Omega. Now he was sitting across a bridge, locked in from every other side on the ashes of his empire. It had been three days, no four, since he'd slept. He'd been taking stims to keep awake, but fatigue was catching up with him. He kept up his sniping, dropping every idiot that wandered into his scope. He jerked back to reality when he heard a crash down below. Had he been dozing off? That wasn't good. He looked up over his cover, and dropped two more of the merc's freelancers. When he had a moment, he took a breath and he knew his time was coming to an end. He pulled up his omnitool and flipped through his contacts, knowing there was only one person he wanted to talk to. He sent the call off and waited, dropping another hostile before his father answered.

"Garrus! Where have you been?" Castis Vakarian answered the call, his voice frantic.

"Hey, dad. It's been a while. How's mom?" Garrus asked, checking the area.

Garrus heard the disapproval in his father's subvocals at Garrus' conversational tone. "She's not doing well, son. Her disease is catching up with her."

Garrus fired at an incoming merc and said, "I'm sorry to hear that. How's Sol?"

"What was that noise?" Castis asked having heard the rifle shot. Just then, one of the freelancers got feisty and tossed a low quality grenade up into his balcony. It bounced past him and back out the window on the other side of the room to detonate mid air behind him while he scoped and dropped the offending freelancer.

"Oh, just a little target practice," he said with an exhausted chuckle. "I know there are always ways I can get better, dad. We both know I'm probably not the best Turian."

Castis was silent for a moment as he listened to the action happening around his son. "You know son, it's like I always say. If you focus and keep your eyes open, you can take out any target. Even a moving one."

"Yeah, dad, I know, but I'm a little tired. I think my work is catching up with me," Garrus sighed, continuing to take down target after target.

"As long as you have at least one bullet left, you can still get the job done, no matter how bad things are," Castis said.

"I've got plenty of bullets, dad, but I'm sure that..." Just as he said that, the air carried a scent to him that he knew was impossible. He must have been worse off than he thought if he was already hallucinating.

"Son, after you're finished there, why don't you come home to Palaven and see your mother before she is too far gone to recognize you. I know Solana would like to see her big brother, too. We'll talk more when you arrive," Castis said as Garrus scanned the bridge below. Now he knew he was hallucinating. Shepard walked boldly past the crates that the mercs had set up for cover on the far end of the bridge. She was flanked by two other humans who spread out on her orders. The scent was undeniable. Vanilla, cherries and Shepard. Had he died while he was talking to his father? "Garrus?"

"Yeah, dad. I'll get home sooner or later. I promise. I think my chances just increased to survivable." With that he ended the call abruptly and lifted his rifle. Peering through his scope, he saw the woman again. He was still seeing and smelling Shepard. How was this possible? Her shock of red hair was the same and she wore similar armor to the armor she had worn back on the SR1. He knew he had to be hallucinating, or he was dead. He quickly grabbed up some concussive rounds, loading them into his rifle and taking aim. His shot pinged off her shields and she glanced up with a severe look of annoyance on her face. Those green eyes could be no one else's, even if they were buried in a face marred with scars. Also he was certain that no one else could stare him down quite so boldly after he'd taken such a clean shot.

He ducked back behind his cover and breathed heavily. She was back. But how? He heard gunfire down below and took a moment to recover from the shock of seeing Shepard. She was back and she was there to rescue him.

* * *

 

Shepard had done everything she could on her way toward the bridge to make certain that their escape would be as easy as possible. She sabotaged some mechs, and killed the Batarian who was fixing up a rather nasty looking gunship. Once she climbed over the barrier seperating the bridge from the merc's base of operations, she set Jacob and Miranda on the freelancers that were still standing. As she walked past a few crates, her shields complained as she took a shot to the chest. She glanced up at the balcony where the shot had come from and balled her fists, glaring at the sniper. "We're here to rescue you, dammit," she cursed as he fell back into cover.

She made her way across the bridge, the only other shots she took were from the remaining freelancers ahead that had made it past Archangel and into the bunker. She called forth her biotics and grabbed a particularly irritating human who continuously kept eating away at her shields with his SMG. She lifted him into the air and then slammed him back down, hearing a satisfying crunch as something broke. He didn't get back up and she moved ahead toward a set of stairs that led up to the balcony. To her left she saw 10 carefully arranged bodies wrapped in sheets. Frowning at the care that had been taken with them, she wondered what the story was behind them. She shook it off and took the stairs two at a time. There were two mercs at the locked door of the balcony trying to hack the lock. She threw a singularity at them, making them easy floating targets for Jacob and Miranda.

Shepard picked the lock herself, obviously a better infiltrator than the mercs. They entered the door and she spotted Archangel propped up in the window, his sniper rifle aimed downward. "Archangel?" she asked loudly as she approached, aiming her gun and remembering the shot he'd taken at her already. He was surrounded by spent thermal clips and stim packets as well as ration wrappers and water bottles. He looked like he'd been there a while.

The Turian held up a hand to hold her off and sighted through his helmet. The rifle shot resounded in the small area and a muffled choke signaled that he had taken down his target. After a moment of scanning with his scope, the Turian pulled his rifle in from the window and using the butt of the gun to lean on he stood from his crouch. He moved toward a pile of crates, removing his helmet as he walked and sat down, putting his feet up on the lower crates in a relaxed postion. For a moment, Shepard couldn't breathe. Then he spoke. "Shepard, I thought you were dead." His voice conveyed a coolness that his subharmonics betrayed as false.

"Garrus!" her own voice sounded choked, even to her. Words could not express how glad she was to see him. "What are you doing here?"

"Just keeping my skills sharp. A little target practice," he shrugged, still playing it cool.

"You okay?" she asked wanting to wrap him in a hug. He looked like he was struggling to even sit up.

"Been better, but it sure is good to see a friendly face," His mandibles parted in that glorious Turian smile that she had grown to love. "Killing mercs is hard work. Especially on my own."

"How'd you manage to piss off every major merc organization in the Terminus Systems?" she asked, crossing her arms and returning his grin.

"It wasn't easy. I _really_ had to work at it. I am amazed that they teamed up to fight me. They must really hate me." he said, hanging his head with some unspoken pain.

"What are you doing out here on Omega?" she asked, wondering why he still wasn't with C-Sec.

"I got fed up with all the bureaucratic crap on the Citadel. Figured I could do more good on my own. At least it's not hard to find criminals here. All I have to do is point my gun and shoot." His mandibles trembled, the slight movement betraying just how tired he was to not be able to hide the emotion.

"Since when did you start calling yourself Archangel?" she teased, hating the sadness behind his eyes and trying to lighten it.

She succeeded for a moment when he chuckled. "It's just a name the locals gave me for all my good deeds. I don't mind it, but please... It's just 'Garrus' to you."

"You nailed me good a couple times, by the way," she rubbed a hand over her heart where the bullet had pinged off her shields.

"Concussive rounds only. No harm done. Didn't want the mercs getting suspicious," he said.

"Uh-huh," she smirked, crossing her arms again.

"If I wanted to do more than take your shields down, I'd have done it. Besides, you were taking your sweet time. I needed to get you moving." She was glad to see that other than the sadness, Garrus hadn't changed. She vowed then and there that she was going to get him out alive and never let him out of her sight again.

After a moment of just taking in his features, she realized why she had chosen that blue color for her armor. It was identical to the color of his clan markings, even faded as they were. She flushed a little as she remembered back to the day he had allowed her to touch them and he had played in her hair like a toddler discovering hair. Clearing her throat she said, "Well, we got here, but I don't think getting out will be as easy."

"No, it won't," he agreed, standing up with an exhausted grunt. "That bridge has saved my life... funneling all those witless idiots into scope." He moved back to his window perch and she followed close behind. "But it works both ways. They'll slaughter us if we try to get out that way."

Jacob piped up from where she had forgotten her other two companions were standing. "We can't just sit here and wait for them to come to us."

"It's not all that bad," Garrus quipped. "This place has held them off so far. And with the three of you...." he shrugged. "I suggest we hold this location, wait for a crack in their defenses, and take our chances. It's not a perfect plan, but it's a plan."

"How'd you let yourself get into this position?" she asked softly, placing a hand on his shoulder.

He glanced briefly in the direction of the ten wrapped bodies downstairs and the sadness was back. "My feelings got in the way of my better judgement. It's a long story." he adjusted the scope on his rifle and continued. "I'll make you a deal: you get me out of here alive, and I'll tell you the whole damn thing."

"I didn't like sneaking anyway. Time to spill a little merc blood," she agreed.

"Glad to see you haven't changed," he said, reaching to almost touch her cheek where she knew her scars glowed softly under her skin. He seemed to rethink the action and part of her wished he hadn't. "Let's see what they're up to..." he cleared his throat and lifted his rifle to scope out the situation below. "Hmm..." his subharmonics resonated and she shuddered, the familiar sound filling her senses. "Looks like they know their infiltration team failed." He handed her the rifle "Take a look. Scouts. Eclipse, I think."

Shepard lifted the heavy rifle and looked through the scope. She saw a slew of mechs climbing over the barricade to start across the bridge. She focused on one and took the shot, exploding its head. "More than scouts. One less now though." She handed his rifle back to him.

He cocked his head at her. "Indeed. We better get ready. I'll stay up here. I can do a lot of damage from this vantage point. You..." He grinned at her. "You can do what you do best. Just like old times, Shepard."

He retook the position he'd had when she arrived and she ducked down near him. They worked well together, just like they'd done before, with barely any adjustment until her biotics mixed with her emotions and activated themselves completely unbidden. There was a particularly thick group of mechs getting closer to the bunker and she almost couldn't reach them to shoot. She felt the anger growing as they threatened to get inside. Nobody was going to get anywhere near her Turian. Her biotics flared and she shouted. Needing to get near them to take them out before they got in forced her body in a flash over the rail and down. She landed in the middle of the group of six and her mass of energy exploded around her. She was thankful for her shields when all six mechs exploded around her. She ducked, covering her head as the mess of debris rained down on her. Her usual biotic tingle was throbbing in the back of her head and she knew that she had over done it. Breathing to quiet the amp, she spun around and saw more mechs coming at her. She took out a few with her shotgun and ran back up to the balcony as quickly as she could, taking her position back up beside Garrus. He was looking at her with no small amount of shock. "I'll explain later," she shrugged and went back to the task at hand.

"I knew I smelled Eezo, but I thought it was your friends," he said, while he sighted down more enemies. "They're sending out a heavy mech."

"That problem should take care of itself," she grinned, standing to look over and watch the carnage.

The mech, as soon as it was activated, began shooting at it's supposed allies. She had bypassed the identify friend/foe program on her way over. Garrus chuckled, as it took out over half of the Salarians and Asari that were trying to get close to it to shut it down, before they simply destroyed it. "Some things never change."

She grinned, patting his shoulder and they took down the rest of the Eclipse, including the stuck up leader, Jaroth, that she had met on her way through the base. Garrus seemed particularly happy about that victory. The Salarian had been selling tainted Eezo all over the place and causing a lot of problems among biotics. As they were talking during the small break between merc groups a muffled explosion rocked the building and alarms sounded on Garrus' omnitool. "They had to use their brains eventually. They're getting in through the tunnels in the basement."

"Shit. What can we do?" she asked.

"Someone needs to get down there and seal off the blast doors. There's three of them that block off the tunnels," he said.

"I'll go, but I'm not leaving you here alone, Big Guy," she said, seeing the fatigue still building in his eyes.

"Are you sure, Shepard?" he asked, still thinking about only her. Some things apparently didn't change.

She nodded, having handled herself until now, what was a few minutes to go press some buttons in a basement? "Jacob," she said, not trusting the look that Miranda was giving Garrus. "You stay here and keep him alive."

"Sure thing," Jacob said with a smile. She was starting to appreciate the man and his willingness to follow every order she gave without question.

"Come on, Miranda." She checked her clip and headed for the stairs.

Garrus communicated with her via comm. He explained that there was a delay in the blast doors closing program that would leave them exposed for 10 seconds while the doors ran through their cycles. She heard him and Jacob shooting as she concentrated on closing the first door. Her heart was racing. She had just gotten him back, she couldn't lose him again. She'd been lost without Garrus, as much as she hated to admit it. The door slammed shut in the face of a Blood Pack Krogan and he roared his displeasure. She backed out of the small hallway, "Good job, Shepard. Two more to go." Garrus said, his voice soothing over the ear piece.

She chose the door to her left first. A small hallway that was barricaded off several times led to a blind corner. She climbed over a few of the barricades heading toward the corner and was assaulted by two Vorcha. She took cover behind the closest barricade and concentrated on getting in head shots. That was the best she could do when it came to Vorcha. When the two fell, she jumped the next barricade and was forced between the barricade and a small section of wall at the corner because waiting for her was a Vorcha with an honest to God flamethrower. "Shit!" she cursed, squashing herself into the tiny bit of cover. "Who the fuck gave a Vorcha a flamethrower!" She pulled up her omnitool and careful to not expose herself quickly tapped out her incinerate program. She targeted the Vorcha's gas tank that he had strapped to his back using a combination of her visor and her omnitool's targeting system. The small blast of fire jumped from her omnitool and shot around the corner following the trajectory she'd mapped. "Miranda! Get down!" She shouted, shielding her face as the Vorcha hissed in fear while his tank overheated. The explosion not only took him out, but there were three other Vorcha close enough to take a hit as well. She leaned out of her cover and took advantage of the screeching chaos and head shotted the ones not killed in the blast.

She spotted the second door and ran for it, hurdling over the remaining barriers to reach the controls and set the 10 second delay in motion before any more Blood Pack showed up. She saw a Krogan rounding the corner and he snarled. She backed up, counting in her head. She should have time and she unloaded a few shots into him to slow him before turning and heading back to the barricades. A satisfying slam made her smile as she climbed back to the basement entry and onward toward the blast shield door on the right.

The third door was a large loading bay door. The garage between them and it was full of Blood Pack. Two heavily shielded Krogan, some Varren and more Vorcha. The Varren all came at them at once, getting so close that they would take her down if she didn't do something. She backpedaled and called her biotics. She swung her arm like she was pitching a softball and from her fingers, a shockwave of energy exploded every few feet as it careened ahead of her, knocking anything in its path a few feet in the air. The wave had used very little energy and the tingle remained, so she used it again. Then she called a Warp field to knock back one of the Krogan who was charging her. The warp hit him and he cried out in agony as the mass effect field stripped him of his defenses at a molecular level. She took the opportunity to blast him with her shotgun and he went down. The remaining offenders were grouped close to the door and she walked boldly forward and gathered her remaining biotic energy. Remembering her need to be in their midst like she had on the balcony with the mechs, she unleashed the charge. Her body flashed forward and just as before, she shot into the middle of the group, expending the energy all at the point of impact. It didn't have as big an effect on the group of regenerators as it had with the mechs, but they were all still stunned. She pulled her shotgun and blasted them out the door. Then she hopped over to the activation button and slammed her palm on it. Counting the ten seconds to herself, she picked off a few more Blood Pack while backing away to get back to Garrus, her job done.

"What's left of the Blood Pack are getting in, Shepard. Get back here, now!" The door slammed shut and she panicked. Garrus was in trouble.

She sprinted back to the basement entry and up the stairs. Just as her and Miranda came back through the doorway, she spotted a large group of Vorcha and Krogan. They were huddled near the stairway and she breathed hard, gathering as much energy as she could while the Blood Pack leader, Garm and another Krogan made their way up the stairs toward the balcony. She charged again, knocking the group of gathered mercs out of her way like bowling pins and gave chase to the leader and his second, leaving the rest to Miranda. They had made it up to the balcony by the time she got there and were trying to charge Garrus and Jacob in the small space. Jacob was handling the second Krogan and she turned her attention to Garm. She hoped she had enough biotic energy left to toss the warp field she called forth. It shot out weakly from her palm, but hit its mark. The Krogan grunted and turned his attention on her instead of backing Garrus into the corner. She pulled her pistol and shot, unloading as entire clip into him as he advanced on her. Jacob downed the other Krogan and started shooting at Garm too, while Shepard reloaded. Garrus had begun sniping down into the room downstairs to lend Miranda a hand. Another full clip later and a few biotic pulls from Jacob to slow his progress, Garm finally went down. Garrus had stopped shooting and Miranda joined them, her perfect hair mussed. Shepard grinned while Garrus said, "Finally took that bastard down. I fought him once before. He was a freak of nature. I've never seen a Krogan regen so fast."

"Well, we only have the Blue Suns left. I say we take our chances and get the hell out of here," Shepard suggested. Before Garrus could respond, behind him, she saw the gun ship rise level with the opening on the balcony.

"Archangel!" a booming voice shouted over the speakers of the ship. Shepard shoved Garrus down and took cover herself just before the machine guns on the ship started firing at them.

"Shit! I thought I took that thing out already!" Garrus grumbled as the weapon peppered the whole place with heavy fire.

"They fixed it, but not completely. I made sure of that," she grinned, remembering the scream of the Batarian as she had shoved what was essentially a giant tazer into his armor and dropped him before he could finish his repairs.

"They're dropping troops!" Jacob shouted from the far side of the room. The gun ship let up and Shepard rolled to take new cover behind a couch in the middle of the room. The troops were swarming in from every direction and the four of them split up, each taking a window and Shepard moved to the stairs and shockwaved anyone who got close to coming up.

She saw the whole thing play out. Just as everything calmed down and most of the troops they had sent on them were dead, Garrus stood from his cover to check on her. She didn't have a chance to shout when the gunship reappeared. It immediately took advantage of Garrus' exposed back. "You think you can fuck with the Blue Suns?" the speakers shouted and he was peppered with machine gun fire as he scurried for cover. Shepard took advantage of the pause in gunfire while the operator reloaded and ran to take cover behind another couch. Garrus was in a bad position and as soon as he attempted to move and take better cover, a rocket shot from the gun ship and headed straight for him.

He was down when the flash of light from the explosion cleared. His rifle laid beside him on the ground floating in his blood. "Garrus!" She shouted, hoping for any signs of life. He didn't respond and her stomach knotted up. She felt rage boiling up inside her mixed with a sickening fear and sadness. She turned away from the bloody mess and ripped the grenade launcher off her back. In quick succession she shot two grenades directly at the gunship. She landed both hits and the explosions disintegrated the gunship in seconds. She dropped the grenade launcher and without a care for anything else ran to Garrus' side. She knelt beside him, afraid to touch him. "Garrus?" she whimpered, tears threatening to flood her eyes. She laid a gentle hand on his shoulder and was about to turn him over to see the damage when he inhaled a sudden harsh gurgling breath. His hand reached for his rifle, his eyes wide. He gripped the barrel tightly and she managed to roll him onto his back. Blood was cascading from the right side of his face. "Hold on, Big Guy! We're gonna get you out of here." she soothed as his eyes fluttered closed again. It sounded like each breath was agony as he choked on his own blood.

* * *

 

Everything happened in a blur. Jacob called their shuttle and it was there within minutes while Miranda applied a ridiculous amount of dextro based medigel to Garrus' injury. Chakwas had arrived with the shuttle and took over. Shepard trusted no one else with Garrus' life more than she trusted Chakwas. The woman had worked miracles. Still she panicked. She felt sick, her body on autopilot. She couldn't lose Garrus. She had just gotten him back. There was too much she needed to share with him. She didn't even realize she was crying hours later until Kelly Chambers approached her outside of the med bay and handed her a tissue. She took it, offering the girl a hollow smile. "Were you friends?" Kelly asked her softly.

"He was on my team when I took down Saren. We were close," she said, not realizing how it sounded until Kelly straight up asked her.

"You were... together?"

"No, no," Shepard shook her head, sniffing. "Not like that. He's my best friend."

"Did you realize you're wearing his clan markings?" She asked a hinting lilt to her tone.

Shepard looked down at her chest which was now covered in Garrus' dark blue blood. Underneath, the lighter shaded blue of his clan markings shone through. She touched her hands to her chest, wiping away the blood that was drying and sighed. "Not until I saw him I didn't."

"Why don't you go get cleaned up, Commander. I'll notify you as soon as anything changes."

Shepard didn't want to leave, but hovering outside the med bay was no way to help. She nodded hesitantly and turned toward the elevator. "Thank you, Kelly."

The Yeoman beamed at her. Shepard knew she should not let her hangups get in the way of her getting to know these people. They would be working together after all and just because they were paid by Cerberus didn't mean they were bad people.

She took the elevator to her quarters and showered quickly. Throwing her comfortable t shirt, cargo pants and hoodie back on. Garrus' blood washed from her skin easily enough, but she shut her armor in the convenient sanitizing compartment built into her fancy dresser. As soon as she was washed up, she went back down to the debriefing room where Jacob and Miranda were standing around chatting like Garrus' life wasn't on the line. She frowned at them and Miranda awkwardly took her leave. Jacob stood across the large table from her and said gently. "Commander, we've done what we could for Garrus, but he took a bad hit." She dropped her gaze as her heart sank. She couldn't lose him. Jacob continued. "The Docs corrected with surgical procedures and some cybernetics. Best we can tell, he'll have full functionality but..."

Just then, the door whooshed open and Garrus stepped in, stopping short with unspent momentum. "Shepard."

She took him in, smiling so big she was actually hurting her scars. He was still the same Garrus, but the right side of his face was destroyed, most of it covered by the patch of cybernetic bandages that Jacob had mentioned. The cowl of his armor had large scorched holes in it, but he hadn't even taken time to remove it before coming to find her. Jacob released a breathy chuckle of surprise. "Tough son of a bitch. Didn't think he'd be up yet."

Garrus started toward her, gesturing at his face. "Nobody would give me a mirror. How bad is it?" There was his familiar teasing tone.

She crossed her arms, so relieved to see him up and about that she couldn't help herself by responding with a wise crack. "Hell, Garrus you were always ugly. Slap some face paint on it and no one will even notice."

He let out a short chuckle that was immediately interrupted with a hiss of pain. "Oh, don't make me laugh, damn it. My face is barely holding together as it is. Some women find facial scars attractive. Mind you, most of those women are Krogan." She shook her head, still unable to stop smiling. Jacob took his leave and Garrus stepped a bit closer to her. "Frankly, I'm more worried about you. Cerberus, Shepard? You remember those sick experiments they were doing?"

She reached out and hugged him. Even after everything he had been through, he was still thinking about her. He hesitated only a moment before his arms wrapped around her, nearly enveloping her entire body. "That's why you're here, Garrus. If I'm walking into hell, I want someone I trust at my side."

He snorted in amusement and gently gripped her upperarms to push her to arms length and look at her. "You realize this plan has me walking into hell, too. Hah, just like old times." He hummed in his throat and she felt herself react to the familiar sound. It was so comforting. She felt cold as he dropped his hands away and backed up. "I'm fit for duty whenever you need me, Shepard. I'll settle in and see what I can do at the forward batteries."

There was so much catching up to do and he was just leaving? She felt hurt, but then realized he was probably feeling terrible. He _had_ just gotten half his face blown off by a rocket. She sighed, disappointed and decided to bury herself in work.

* * *

 

Garrus found his way to the forward batteries. It would be good to busy his hands with something to take his mind off his worry. Shepard was back, but she was different. Sure she walked and talked the same, but all of those implants shining through her scars had him concerned. Plus, since when was she a biotic? Cerberus had done a number on her. The only thing that gave him a sense of peace was her scent. Outside of the trace amounts of Eezo, she still smelled one hundred percent Shepard.

When she'd hugged him, it had taken everything he had not to run his fingers through her hair. He'd been two years feeling like he was missing a piece of him and now that it was back, he didn't know how to feel. His face ached and Chakwas had given him enough painkillers to drop a Krogan, but he had needed to see her. She'd been wearing that familiar thing she'd called a hoodie and smiling and he'd felt whole again. He'd never missed someone so much as he had missed Shepard. He fully intended to do something about the Normandy's guns, but when the Cerberus flunkie had brought him a cot, backing out quickly after setting it up in the back of the battery, he had been overwhelmed. He was exhausted and between the meds and his stims wearing off, he fell asleep almost instantly.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I chose to get a bit crafty with how I believe Biotics should work. IMHO the game restrictions on class are a bit silly.


	12. Acclimatizing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Garrus back, Shepard has to adjust to her new life.

Shepard threw a warp field at the Vorcha with a flamethrower, again cursing whoever had armed the mindless jerks. When they'd met Mordin Solus he had been neck deep in plague victims. He'd spoken quickly, often leaving words out or slurring some of the longer ones together. Then he'd handed her a few vials in a pouch and asked her to restart the oxygen systems while spreading the cure in the vials through the fans. Zaeed who she had asked to come with her so she could test his skills in a team setting had proven to be a foul mouthed pain in the ass, but he could follow orders well enough.

He and Jacob were covering her back while she fiddled with the final giant fan. She was starting to feel the day catching up with her and she wanted to get off of Omega with her scientist and get out of her armor. She was also extremely hungry. She realized in the chaos that she honestly hadn't eaten since she'd had a quick ration bar in the shuttle coming back from Freedom's Progress. Her life was spiraling and she needed to get control of it. As she input the final code to reactivate the fan, she sighed in relief. Soon, Mordin's plague cure would spread throughout the district and Omega would be back to some semblance of normal.

After leaving his clinic in the hands of his assistant, Mordin excitedly accompanied her back to the Normandy. She got him settled in the tech lab where he was thrilled that she had samples from Freedom's Progress for him to play with. Making sure there was nothing else he needed, she headed up to her cabin to change. Keeping her hoodie, she changed to a pair of comfy sweats and another white t shirt.

Addressing her most persistent need first, she shuffled down to the mess in her socks, hands shoved in her hoodie pocket. The same man was there that she'd seen when she'd first gotten on the ship. "Ah, Commander Shepard, I was wondering when you'd show up to eat," he said, smiling. "Mess Sergeant Rupet Gardner, at your service."

They had a short chat while he fixed her up a sandwich and he apologized for the state of the supplies. Apparently Cerberus could pay top dollar for everything else, but the ration situation was grim. She asked him about dextro rations, thinking about Garrus and any other Dextro they may pick up along the way. He assured her there was food, but he couldn't testify to the quality. She hadn't had a chance to do much in Omega's market district, but she vowed that before they left the next day, that she would take a walk through the shops and check out the situation. If nothing was to be done here, her next stop would be the Citadel. She had a few people to talk to anyway, now that she was back.

She sat down at a table and enjoyed her sandwich in relative peace due to the fact that no one seemed to want to approach her. When she finished, she returned her dish to Rupert who was grateful to hear she'd enjoyed her dinner. Pouring a mug of coffee, she sighed and started her rounds. First, since she was there, she visited Miranda who gently brushed her off due to paperwork. Then she crossed over and paid a visit to Chakwas who clucked at her facial scars. Were they getting worse? She rubbed at her face where the skin was parted and frowned. She asked Chakwas about why her skin held together even with all of the damage. Chakwas explained something about a high tech skin weave that would fade after the scars healed over. Just one more upgrade. Shepard also asked about Garrus and Chakwas told her all she could about his injuries.

Shepard worried about her friend as she left the med bay. She glanced toward the main battery down the hallway and was tempted to go knock and see if he was busy. She decided against it, letting him have his space if he needed it. Something had really traumatized him on Omega and she didn't plan on pressuring him for answers. He would come to her when he was ready. That's how their friendship worked. She dragged herself to the elevator and made her way down to engineering to get a look at the Normandy's new drive core. She came upon two new faces and the woman with short brown hair saluted and introduced herself as Engineer Gabriella Daniels, while the man gave her a once over and drawled in a Scottish accent that he was Engineer Ken Donnely. When she asked how everything was going down in engineering, Ken gave her an earful about a maintenance issue they were having. Gabby, as he called her, downplayed the problem as nothing Shepard needed to worry about. She nodded and took the time to memorize the name of the part they were looking to replace and added it to her list for the Omega markets the next day. Then she excused herself and as she walked off, Ken expressed his surprise that she had come all of the way down there to meet them. From what she caught, Gabby was less shocked.

Her next stop was the small space near the workout room and trash chute where Zaeed had set up his things, including a computer which he had used to hack into the ship's surveillance systems. The screen covering his little area was helpfully showing up as a snowy mess. "I see EDI has eyes on all of us," she said to him as he dutifully cleaned up his assault rifle with great care. She leaned on a table, cradling her coffee in her hands and taking a sip.

He grunted. "Bloody thing is watching everyone at all hours."

"Can it hear us down here?" Shepard whispered.

He shook his head and grunted again. "I made sure to disable the camera as soon as I found it. No sound either."

He didn't seem to be the type for long conversations, but she felt relaxed for a moment while she was out of the AI's line of sight. He answered most of her questions with grunts except for the few stories he told about his few personal effects that he'd set up around the area. When she realized he wasn't going to give her much more she excused herself and went across the ship to the cargo bay. It was deserted and she found her bottle of brandy pretty easily. Tucking it under her arm, she went back to the elevator to take it to her room. She would give it to Chakwas later. Then she headed back down to the bridge deck, checking on Joker and stopping in to finally have a conversation with Jacob who was hanging out in the Armory. They talked about his days in the Alliance and how he was upset about how they had treated Shepard's image after her death. The conversation made her feel a little better about having him on the team. He had apparently joined Cerberus with his own conditions of service, kind of like her. The dark skinned man had kind eyes, but there was a sense of mischievousness in his gaze. He roved his eyes all over Shepard every chance he got. If Kaidan had looked at her like that back on the SR1, he would have not had to wait quite so long for her to give in to breaking regs. Here on the SR2, she chose to ignore the blatant flirting. She was not sure where Kaidan was, but she wasn't going to give up on him until she could speak to him.

The only one left was Mordin and she figured he was probably busy with his specimens, so she trudged to the elevator to go to her quarters. Kelly stopped her to inform her she had new messages and Shepard nodded her thanks before going to check them in her room. She set her empty mug beside her computer and glanced at her photo of Kaidan. It didn't give her quite the same level of peace as it had before she found Garrus. She sighed and pulled up her emails. She actually had one from Anderson and she was shocked to see he had heard of her miraculous revival. Now she knew for certain that her next stop was going to be the Citadel. She flipped through her other messages and not seeing anything important, she shut down the screen and shuffled to her couch to get some shut eye.

* * *

 

It couldn't have been two hours later when she heard her name being called. "Shepard?" She felt a hand on her shoulder and she groaned as it shook her. "Shepard."

She pried her eyes open and saw Garrus' familiar blue eyes looking down at her with concern written all over his features. She cringed when she laid eyes on his bandage, and thought about how close she had been to losing him. "Garrus," she said groggily, sitting up, his hand still on her shoulder. He sat down beside her on the couch, not taking his eyes off of her. She smiled at him and watched him take note of every single difference in her face that she had already noticed, his mandibles flickering. "What time is it?" she asked, playing it casual and trying to keep her fear of him rejecting her buried.

"I don't know," he admitted almost sheepishly. "What were you doing sleeping on the couch?"

Her eyes shot toward the bed and then to the skylight and she shuddered. His gaze followed hers and he put the pieces together as she said. "I just can't. Not after... It's too open."

He gathered her in his arms and she sighed, thankful that he understood. "Oh, Shepard. Spirits. What you must have gone through."

She pulled away, and gathered herself. "That's all in the past," she said, trying to wave it away.

He stood up and beckoned her. "You can't live on the couch, Shepard." She shook her head, feeling her eyes widening and her heart beginning to race. "Come on over and I'll tell you that story you wanted to hear about Omega." She bit her lip, her eyes flicking from him to the skylight and back again. She trusted Garrus with her life and she knew that there was no logical reason for her to fear the skylight, but every time she got near it, her palms sweated and her heart raced as she remembered those last few moments of agonizing pressure as she suffocated. He beckoned her again, his good mandible pulling away from his face in a reassuring smile. She slowly stood up from the couch, dragging the blanket behind her. One step at a time as she kept glancing up at the wide picture of space through the glass. It was still now, every star visible in the dimness of the room. She sidestepped instead of progressing forward and Garrus moved with her. One step at a time, she walked so she was standing in front of him at the corner of the skylight. When she glanced up at the open space, her panic truly set in. She started breathing heavily, nearly panting and a frightened whimper escaped her throat. He gently took her chin with his fingers and turned her attention to his soft blue eyes. "I'm right here, Shepard."

She held eye contact with him, her own eyes bugging out as she fought her fear. She took deep gulps of air, while he rubbed his hands up and down her arms, and a soothing purr rumbled in his chest. She finally gained control of her racing heart and allowed him to guide her to sit down on the edge of the bed. "I'm such a mess," she admitted softly.

He clucked his tongue. "You got spaced, Shepard. You were killed and then two years later you wake up in enemy hands, Eezo coursing through you veins and you probably can hardly recognize your own face." he said. "I'm pretty certain there will be an adjustment period."

"I'm so lucky I found you," she said letting him move her to lie down and tossing the blanket over her.

"How did you find me by the way?" he sat down on the edge of the bed that she had just vacated.

Her heart was quickening again without him right beside her and she asked him with her eyes to lie down beside her. As he joined her without a second thought, she said shakily, "I honestly had no clue you were Archangel. Cerberus gave me a pile of dossiers of people they thought I could convince to help me. The Illusive Man told me you had fallen off the grid a few months after I died and no one could find you."

"I still don't like that we are working for Cerberus, but I can't exactly question your judgement. Not after I got my own squad killed," he said, his arm wrapping around her waist in case she decided to bolt.

She remembered waking up in a similar position the morning after Ashley had been killed and wondered why it was always Garrus that was able to comfort her the most. "How'd you wind up fighting mercenaries here on Omega?" she asked him, snuggling closer to his warmth.

"I went back to C-Sec after the Normandy was destroyed, but with all of the rebuilding at the Citadel, it was too much chaos for me to really help. Omega was filled with criminals nobody else could touch. There was no red tape to slow me down. It was a perfect fit. The people here needed someone to believe in, someone to stand up to the local thugs," he explained, a fresh wound reopening in his voice.

"That explains how you started. How'd you end up with a squad?" she asked.

"Not too different from how you formed your squad to fight Saren actually," he said, a short chuckle punctuating his words. "You prove that you get things done and people join up. Mercs who wanted to atone, Security consultants tired of playing by the rules, I gave them hope... and now they're dead." He became very still behind her and she rolled slightly to get a look at his face. "Shows what I know."

"Tell me about your squad," she nudged him gently to let him know she felt his pain. She'd been the only survivor before. It was a hard thing to live with.

"There were 12 of us, including me. Former military operatives, C-Sec agents, the usual. Had a Salarian explosives expert, pretty sure he'd spent some time in the Special Tasks Group. My tech expert was a Batarian, believe it or not. Not the friendliest guy, but he could hack any system ever built."

Garrus paused in his story, and she thought he might not continue on his own, so she asked. "What did your merc squad do? Didn't sound like you were available for hire."

"You saw Omega. It was full of thugs kicking the helpless. I formed my team to kick back. We weren't mercenaries, at least nobody was paying us. We made money by taking down slavers, pirates, or gangs that went too far."

"Doesn't sound like you made any friends with the gangs." That much was obvious from the state she had fond him in, but she was finding he needed more pushing to continue.

"I got three separate merc bands to work together to take me down. My manager at C-Sec would be impressed." He let out a thoughtful hum in his chest. "It was simple. We'd hit their shipments, disrupt activities, get under their skin, make them angry. They'd come charging right into our well prepared kill zone, crossfire and snipers. Clean and surgical. They never stood a chance." There was pride in his voice as he told her how good his team had been. She liked that he had taken so much initiative without her.

She paused before asking the next question, remembering the 10 well tended bodies on the first floor of his bunker. "How did those mercenary gangs take down your team?"

He sighed, his breath warm on her neck and he huddled closer, needing her comfort as much as she needed his. "It was my own damn fault. One of my people betrayed me. A Turian named Sidonis." He spat the name like it tasted bad on his tongue. "He drew me away just before the mercs attacked my squad, then he disappeared. Everyone except me is dead because of him and because I didn't see it coming."

"I'm not sure I understand, what happened exactly?" She found herself rubbing her thumb up and down over his exposed talons, offering a bit of comfort for them both as she brazenly stared out the open window at the still vacuum of space.

"Sidonis asked for my help on a job. When I got to the meeting point, nobody was there. By the time I got back to our hideout, the mercs had killed all but two of my squad. They didn't last long." he said, his throat making that strange keening sound she remembered from Virmire. He was crying.

"Do you know where Sidonis is now?" she asked, feeling the need to enact her own justice on the person responsible for causing Garrus so much pain.

"No. His trail vanishes after he leaves Omega, but I'll keep hunting. I lost my whole team except for Sidonis. One day I'll find him and correct that." They were silent for a long time. The quiet was comforting, not awkward. Suddenly, he spoke again. "I'm sorry."

"What for, Big Guy?" she asked.

"For not having your six," he said.

"There was nothing you could have done. It was nobody's fault but the ones who attacked us." Silence fell again until she yawned and he pulled slightly away. "Please, don't go," she requested, nearly panicking. When he hummed and moved closer again she said, "Can you talk to me?" She felt silly asking, but his voice was so soothing.

He hummed again then said, "You really should get some sleep, Shepard."

"It will help. Trust me," she assured him.

He took a moment to gather his thoughts but then he began to talk aimlessly. Shepard really didn't listen to what he was saying, but listened to the rhythm of is voice. It was deep and melodic and she felt herself dozing off much like she had done when listening to music as a kid. It was the safest she'd felt since she'd woken up in that Cerberus facility.

* * *

 

How could he have ever doubted that this was his Shepard? He'd stopped talking after he'd felt her breathing slow and her muscles ease. Now he was watching her sleep. In spite of the scars marring her cheeks and the obvious changes in her complexion, she was still her, down to her insistence that nothing was going to defeat her, including her own fear. He'd never seen her so close to a breakdown as he had when she'd stepped under the skylight. Her green eyes had glazed over and she'd frozen in place, shaking all over. He had worried that pushing her had been a mistake, but then as she took his pain on her shoulders, listening to his story, she had stared out into the void and challenged it. There was no question Shepard was back. The Spirits had performed a miracle.

He wasn't certain how long he watched her sleep, but she stirred once, frowning and calling out in her sleep and he pulled her closer, cooing with his subharmonics like his mother had done for him when he was a child. He rested his good cheek on top of hers, as close has he could get, hoping he didn't wake her, but he felt the need to let her know he had her back however she needed him. After a while, he felt himself dozing as well.

* * *

 

Shepard awoke early in the day cycle like she had always done before. She glanced up and her heart skipped a beat when she saw the skylight, but then she swallowed the fear and took a deep breath to calm herself. Garrus was tucked against her back, much like he had been the last time they'd slept in the same bed. This time he had her fully pinned though. His right leg was tossed over her hip, both his arms were wrapped around her and his head was using her head as a pillow. She was glad that she could offer him a bit of comfort just as he had offered her so many times before. She couldn't help but chuckle as his subharmonics rumbled in the Turian equivalent of a snore. She glanced up at her nightstand and beside the clock she noticed at some point he had removed his visor. She'd only once before seen him without it and she peered closer at the inactive bit of metal. Etched in the metal work were ten names. She felt her heart clench when she realized he had carved the names of his dead squad in his visor. She reached out, careful to not disturb him and picked up the visor. She read each name, wondering who they had been. Maybe some day he would be willing to share some stories with her. As she turned the piece of metal in her fingers, she noticed another name carved farther toward the back on the inside. _Ann Shepard_. Her vision blurred as she read her own name. Just as she was about to set the visor back on the nightstand and wipe the tears away, he stirred. "You awake, Shepard?" he rumbled, careful not to move until he knew she was awake.

"Yeah," she responded, the tremble in her voice betraying her.

He sat up, immediately on alert. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she sat up, turning to face him and handing the visor back to him. "I'm sorry."

He took it, a look of understanding crossing his features as he stared at the visor himself for a moment and then put it back in its rightful place, switching on the power. "If we keep this up, we'll never get anything done," he said.

"And who else will save the galaxy?" she said wiping her tears away and centering herself to face the day. "I need to go down to the station and see if I can get some good rations and some sort of engineering doodad for Ken and Gabby."

"Did you want me to come with you?" he asked, tentatively standing up from the bed, making sure she wasn't going to freak out before he rolled his neck and stretched out his arms.

She stood and did her best not to bolt out from under the skylight immediately. "I think I'll head down on my own. They may believe you're dead, but if the wrong person sees you, it could cause a huge problem that can be avoided."

The look on his face said he hated the idea, but he didn't fight with her. "Fair enough, Shepard. I may actually get around to calibrating that damn gun today," he said.

"I'm glad you're still useful without a Mako around," she joked stepping over to her dresser and grabbing a change of clothes.

"You will find out, Shepard, I am plenty useful when it comes to really big guns."

Her laughter shocked even her when her mind took his tone and phrase and turned it dirty. What the hell was going on with her since she'd come back. Between her need to find Garrus, her subconscious choosing of color on her armor and the way his voice made her feel, she was unsure. She'd never been unsure of anything in her life. Then there was Kaidan. They had been more than a physical fling. She loved him and she missed him, but she didn't know if he had moved on. She had been dead for two years. Two years was a long time to expect him to wait for a dead woman. She didn't expect anything from Garrus either. He was her best friend and she was so grateful to have him back. She wasn't even certain that she was actually attracted to him. She'd never thought Turians were attractive before. She shook off her thoughts and the laughter while he cocked his head at her and his forehead plates pushed together in a frown. She waved off the explanation for her outburst and headed to the bathroom for a shower.

When she finished in the shower and forced herself to glance in the mirror, the first thing she noticed was her scars looked significantly thinner than they had just the day before. She traced a finger over the one that followed her jawline on the left and marveled at the difference. Maybe she wasn't doomed to resemble Saren after all. When she left the bathroom, Garrus was already gone and she dropped her laundry in the chute and locked the door behind her. She took the elevator to the crew deck and made her way to the mess hall. Rupert was concocting something for breakfast that smelled terrible, but the coffee brewing in the background smelled heavenly. "Ah, Shepard, greetings!" Mordin saluted her with his mug as he passed by quickly, a datapad in his opposite hand. The Salarian never slowed down. He exhausted her, just watching him. "Lots to do. Break for breakfast while analysis computes."

"Good morning to you too, Mordin!" she called after him as he disappeared around the corner toward the elevator.

Zaeed was standing against a wall by the med bay, watching everyone as they sat down for breakfast. Shepard tossed him a nod as she passed and he returned it shortly. He was going to be a tough nut to crack, but she was determined. She had broken Wrex and she would break Zaeed. She grabbed herself a mug of coffee and a ration bar, not interested in whatever it was that Rupert had concocted and sat down at one of the tables beside Miranda. "Good Morning, Commander."

"Good Morning, Miranda," she said taking a sip of her coffee. The food might be questionable, but the coffee was some of the best she'd ever tasted. As she sipped, she saw Garrus venturing out from the Main Battery in fresh clothes and she waved at him. He tossed her an informal salute, grinning and made his way toward the kitchen. He spoke briefly with Rupert and the man directed him to a cabinet above the refrigerator. She watched him rummage for something and then she was distracted by Kelly sitting in front of her.

"How is our newest Turian crew member doing? His injuries looked painful."

Shepard tugged her eyes from the Turian in question and took another short sip of her coffee then responded while opening her ration bar. "He says he's okay, but I worry about him. He's been through a lot." She glanced up, watching Garrus preparing himself a cup of kava, which she knew was the dextro equivalent of coffee.

"There is something about him. I just wanna hold him close and whisper, 'it will be alright.'" Kelly mused, glancing back at Garrus.

Shepard picked a crumb off her ration bar and found herself saying, "I know exactly what you mean."

"You two would be such a cute couple!" Kelly said a little louder than Shepard would have liked. Garrus was a Turian after all and his hearing was impeccable.

Shepard's eyes widened both at the shock of Kelly's volume and the words that had come from her own mouth. "It's nothing like that," she hissed. Kelly gave her a disbelieving look and then Shepard glanced at Miranda who was hiding a smile behind her own cup of coffee. "Ugh what is this, high school?" Shepard grunted. "Garrus and I are friends, end of story." She was suddenly not hungry anymore and she excused herself from the conversation before more embarrassing things were said.

* * *

 

Shepard trudged through the Omega market, her hands shoved in her hoodie pockets and her shoulders hunched as she tried to blend in. She had soon come to realize that the only useful things she would find there were illegal weapon mods and armor upgrades that were less impressive than the ones she already had. She _had_ found a few ship models and some polish for her new longer nails that she picked up for cheap after threatening to take her business elsewhere. If her nails were going to stay long, she would need deterrent from biting them and polish was the best deterrent she could think of. She was getting ready to leave when she came across a young Quarian who had apparently come to Omega on his pilgrimage and gotten stuck here selling junk and used parts after being robbed. She felt sorry for the boy. Omega was such a shit place. Nobody should be trapped there. She offered him 1000 credits in exchange for the part she had spotted among his wares. It was exactly what Ken and Gabby needed. He was hesitant to take her money, but she insisted. He thanked her emphatically and practically skipped away to get a ship off the station. She smiled, thinking of Tali and hoping she was okay.

After returning to the Normandy and turning over the part to the engineers, she made her way to the galaxy map and plotted their course for the Citadel. She made it her priority to find some better rations for everyone and to visit with Anderson. She also remembered that there was another person from her list of dossiers that was waiting for her there.

She made her way to her cabin and tossed her purchases on her desk before picking up the fully dried model SR2 and placing it on some of the pegs that stuck out from the glass separating her office from her bedroom. It was a perfect fit. She carefully pulled the other models from the bag she had them in and put them in a drawer for later.

When she pulled the nail polish from the bottom of the bag, she groaned. She had done it again. She had not noticed the color in the dim lighting of Omega, but in the light of her cabin she saw that she had yet again found the perfect shade of blue to match Garrus' clan markings. She flopped down in her desk chair, thumbing the bottle and biting her lip. She was not certain if it had been a coincidence, but somewhere deep down, she was not hating the idea. She set the bottle aside, intending to give it time before she decided. Maybe she could find a more appropriate color on the Citadel while she was there.

Chakwas' bottle of Brandy caught her eye then and she grabbed it up. Their flight to the Citadel would take a few days and she intended to thank Chakwas for all she had done for Garrus. What better way than replacing her lost bottle of expensive booze.

Down in the med bay, Chakwas greeted her with a smile. "Your scars are looking much better, Commander."

Shepard touched her own cheek and returned the smile. "I got something for you." She pulled the bottle out from behind her back and offered it to the doc.

"Serrice Ice Brandy! You shouldn't have," she said taking the bottle almost reverently.

Shepard shrugged. "It's the least I could do. You saved Garrus."

Chakwas offered her a soft smile. "I was just doing my job, but I know what he means to you, Commander." Chakwas paused then her smile turned devious. "I let my other bottle go to waste. I don't intend to make the same mistake with this one. Drink with me Commander... If you have the time."

Shepard smiled. "I'll get the glasses."

Getting drunk with Chakwas was not how she intended to spend her day, but listening to her seemingly endless stories about her days as a doctor with the Alliance made Shepard feel good. She helped the doctor hours later to one of the med bay beds, nearly falling over herself. The room was spinning and she slowly made her way back to the elevator without running into anyone else. After a few attempts, she managed to press the button to her cabin. The locked door was a greater challenge. She could not for the life of her get her fingers to type out the right code. She stood in front of the door forever, getting frustrated. When she heard the elevator open behind her she spun around, grateful to anyone who could help her get inside her door. When she kept spinning too far and stumbled into the other person she giggled and let them prop her back on her feet. "Shepard?"

"Garrus!" she shouted in excitement. "I can't get in my room."

He chuckled and the rumbling in his chest made her fall into him in an attempt to feel it. He propped her up again and said, "I went to Chakwas for my meds and she informed me that you and her had made some unfortunate decisions with a bottle of brandy." He made sure she could stand on her own and punched in her door code to let them both in.

She leaned on him until they made it through the door then she deposited herself into her desk chair taking a quick glance at the photo of Kaidan and touching his face before spotting the blue nail polish sitting on the desk. "All good decisions," she corrected. "I feel good."

He chuckled again. "You say that now. Wait until the morning."

She scoffed, grabbing up the bottle. "Paint my nails, Garrus."

"What?" he asked, frowning at her.

She shook the small bottle in his face, standing to get closer to hand it to him. "Come on, Bug Guy. I can't see straight. Help me out. Do me a solid."

She dropped the bottle into his hands and he studied it for a moment. "Your nails?" he asked.

"Yeees," she said drawing out the word with exasperation. Then she wiggled her fingers in his face almost slapping him. "My nails."

He dodged her hand, grabbing it with his. "Okay, I guess, but you are going to want to sit down Shepard. You're... wobbling."

"Weebles wobble...." she said frowning as she tried to remember the rest of the phrase. She allowed him to guide her to the sofa and sit her down. "Have you ever painted nails before, Big Guy?"

"Can't say that I have," he said sitting next to her. "But I happen to be an expert with paint brushes." He indicated his face. She nodded as seriously as she could while watching him figure out the mechanics of the nail polish. She studied his face. The paint of his clan markings was faded, she supposed, from going a while without touching it up. Once he had the small brush situated in his talons, he beckoned for her hand. She slapped her left hand into his right and he gently gripped it. When he tried to carefully swipe the brush over her thumb nail, he had to pull back a few times when she moved. "You need to hold still, Shepard, unless you want your whole hand painted," he said with a patient smile.

"Sorry," she said doing her best to concentrate on holding her hand still. His three talons held her hand gently as he expertly stayed within the confines of her nails. She could never remember being that good with her own nails when she was growing up. "You're so good at that," she said when he finished her pinky and pulled back to admire his work.

"Let's have the other hand," he said. She carefully laid her drying hand flat on her thigh and placed her other hand in his. He dipped the brush to refresh the paint and started in on her other hand. He took his time, careful not to paint her skin, just like he had on the other hand. When he finished, he blew gently on her fingers to help dry the polish and she shuddered, trying to cover the reaction by pulling her hand away and admiring the look of her fingers. "It's a good color on you," he said. His voice told her he recognized that she had matched his clan markings. She couldn't get her mind to focus enough to read exactly how he felt about that.

She sat back, leaning her head back and closing her eyes. She heard what sounded like a sigh as he leaned forward and returned the cap to the bottle. They sat quietly for a bit and Shepard tried like hell to stay awake, but her drink was catching up with her. Suddenly, she was moving. She panicked for a moment then realized Garrus was moving her to her bed. She snuggled close to his chest as he carried her the few feet to the bed and deposited her gently on her pillow.

* * *

 

Shepard woke in the morning with her head pounding. The last thing she remembered was Chakwas telling her stories. She sat up and groaned, pressing her hands to her head. It felt way too big for her body. She glanced at her nightstand to see what time it was and she saw a mystery glass of water and a couple of aspirin sitting there. Not caring how they had gotten there, she reached for the glass and noticed her hands. When had she painted her nails? Upon closer inspection she realized that there was no way she had done such a perfect job on her own fingers, especially if she had been as drunk as she suspected. Who had painted her nails and left her aspirin?

She popped the pills and swallowed them down with the water, finishing the whole glass to counter the nasty taste and cottony feel of her tongue. She felt surprisingly good for the amount of alcohol she had consumed. Was that just another of her many upgrades? If so, she wasn't going to complain. She took a relaxing shower and dressed again casually. She made her way down to the mess for coffee. "Good morning, Rupert. Do we have anything resembling bacon around here?" she asked with a grin as she poured her coffee.

"You should know better than to ask that, Commander." he returned the grin.

"Rough night?" Zaeed asked, pushing up beside her to take the carafe from her hand and get his own cup of coffee.

Rupert handed her a plate of something that looked like eggs and she thanked him as he smiled apologetically. "You could say that," she replied to Zaeed.

"I've got a stash of beef jerky," he whispered conspiratorially as they walked away toward the tables. "It's not the same as bacon, but I reckon it's greasy enough to help."

"Thanks," she said. "But I had some aspirin. I'll let that and the coffee do their jobs."

"Suit yourself, Shepard. Lemme know if you change your mind. You know where to find me." He took his coffee to the elevator and she sat down to poke at her 'eggs'.

Soon enough, the rest of the crew began filtering in, everyone seeming a bit more relaxed than they had so far. Miranda and Jacob were talking like they were old friends, standing by the door to her quarters. Shepard wondered if there was history between them, because their body language said they were familiar. Their conversation ended and Jacob came to sit by Shepard. "You look like shit," he commented with a teasing smile as he opened his ration bar.

She chuckled and said, "Is that any way to talk to your CO?"

"Sensitivity to light, food barely touched, voice gravely. Long night, Shepard? Recommend aspirin and fluids," Mordin sat down across from her, sliding another cup of coffee toward her to replace her empty mug.

"I've got the aspirin covered," she said with a grateful smile as she took the offered mug.

Mordin nodded. "Good to cut loose during down time. Happened all the time in STG."

"We haven't had much time to talk since you came aboard, Mordin," she said, seizing the opportunity to have a conversation with the Salarian. "Can you tell me about your work with STG?"

Mordin started off on a fast paced tangent about his time with the Special Task Group and she soaked up as much as she could with her sluggish brain. He was certainly passionate about his work and it made her feel good that he was working with her on their current problem. She took the time to concentrate on his face, making it easier to keep up. Salarians as a whole usually only lived about 40 years and from the wrinkles dominating the dark rust orange skin on his face, Mordin was likely in his 30s. The Salarian species always reminded her the most of the old Earth vids about little green men from space. Their tall bodies were thin all over and their heads were bulbous up top and they had short horns that rose from the top turning inwards to touch. Mordin had only one horn, having lost the other somehow. His opposite cheek had crisscrossing scars that she also wondered how he'd gotten. While he was talking, Garrus came from the Main Battery. She found herself watching him move around the kitchen much like he had the morning before. This time, nothing forced her to leave before he joined them. She realized after Garrus sat down that Mordin had finished talking. He was happily humming as he ate his breakfast, blissfully unaware that she had probably not heard the last few minutes of what he had been saying. "Feeling better, Shepard?" Garrus asked, grinning at her.

She flushed, realizing that it must have been him that had left her the water and aspirin. Had he painted her nails, too? She tucked her hands under the table in her lap and said, "Did I do anything embarrassing last night? It's been a while since I drank."

He glanced at her out of the tops of his eyes as he fiddled with the wrapper of his ration bar. "Well at first, you couldn't unlock your own door. Then you asked me to paint your nails... You're welcome by the way," he said with a teasing grin.

"Oh god," she groaned hiding her face in her palms as Jacob laughed. Mordin took everything in with a studious expression as he continued to eat his breakfast.

"No harm done, Shepard. I made sure you were tucked in and left you some aspirin. The gun calibrations can wait when your Commander is in desperate need of a manicure," he continued to tease her.

"You are terrible, Vakarian," she said as he chuckled.

 


	13. A Night Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard is dragged into a side mission for her newest recruit.

When they docked with the Citadel, Shepard felt strange coming back after 2 years. Everything looked different. With all of the rebuilding after Sovereign, they had remodeled the Zakera ward. It had a lot more neon lights than she remembered. She got out of the taxi with Garrus and Mordin on her heels. Mordin had asked to come along to pick up some supplies for his lab and Garrus insisted he was going to have her six even though it was just the Citadel. Her eyes struggled to take in everything and then she heard her name being called. She glanced around and noticed what looked like a broken advertisement. "Commander Shepard state your password to receive a free gift!"

Shepard approached the advertisement and saw a woman's face flickering in and out between the flashing ads. She frowned as the voice asked again for her password. Remembering something about the dossier for Kasumi Goto she questioningly said, "Silence is Golden?"

"Congratulations," the woman's voice said. She continued on by introducing herself and mentioning something about formal wear.

"Formal wear?" Shepard asked, crossing her arms over her armor.

"Oh, didn't Cerberus mention? They promised me help with a heist in exchange for my services on your mission," the hooded woman stated, her face flickering back onto the screen.

Shepard sighed. "Well if that's what Cerberus promised you, we'll take care of it. Welcome aboard. Did you need any help getting your things on board the Normandy?"

The face flickered off again and the woman's voice changed pitch as Shepard realized she had stopped talking through the ad. "Don't worry, I travel light. I already slipped my things onto your ship."

Shepard looked up and saw a woman dressed in a one piece form fitting suit with a dark hood covering her face. The woman waved briefly and then disappeared under a tactical cloak. "Charming," Shepard grumbled and headed to the security checkpoint that would get her onto the Ward.

A brief delay over her credentials turned into a small talk with Captain Bailey, a human C-Sec officer, who saved her a ton of time by 'correcting' her slight case of dead in the computer. She thanked him for the help and continued on her mission. She was much more impressed with the market here than she had been on Omega, which was no surprise. She set up a deal with the proprietor of Zakera Cafe for high quality rations for both the levo and dextro needs of her ship. After shopping around a bit, Mordin disappeared, promising to be back to the Normandy in a few hours. It left her alone with Garrus. They grabbed lunch and then she decided to visit Anderson. Garrus chafed at her asking him to stay behind, but he relented and she caught a cab to the Presidium.

She found Anderson's office easily enough, following the signs for the human Councilor. When she knocked on the door and it opened to admit her, she smiled, seeing Anderson standing at the far side of the room looking out at the Presidium from his balcony. When he turned and saw her, his look of shock told her he hadn't believed the rumors were true until she was standing in front of him. "Shepard!" he said, regaining his composure and moving across the room to greet her. "Welcome back to the ranks of the living! I wasn't sure you got my message."

"It's been a long time, Captain," she said as they embraced warmly. She had missed the man who had come to be like a father to her.

"It's Councilor now," he corrected with a grin. "I had to give up my commission when I joined the council. I'm glad you came, though I was hoping the rest of the Council would be here for this meeting, too. Unfortunately they rarely listen to me. Sometimes I wonder if Udina might have been the better choice for this."

"Nobody said this was gonna be easy, but I know you. You get things done," she assured him, standing by her decision. The fact that Anderson hated the job was the reason he was perfect for it. The last thing humanity needed to be standing for them was another politician.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, but I doubt Udina would echo it. He thinks I need to work on my 'people skills'." Anderson said using air quotes around the words.

"The Ambassador knows how to play politics. Just tell him what you need and let him figure out how to push it through," Shepard suggested.

"Unfortunately that usually involves pissing off the rest of the Council. They veto my suggestions and nothing changes. Truth is, I just just don't have the knack for compromising my principles. A bad trait for a councilor."

She smiled at the obvious zing against politicians. Anderson seemed like his usual self. "I'm still not clear on why you wanted me to come," she said changing the subject so he couldn't put himself down any further.

"There's been a lot of talk since you came back. Some of what I hear has been frankly a little bit disturbing. I wanted to give you a chance to explain your actions, maybe get the Council to see things from your point of view, but they refused to see you." He began pacing with his arms behind his back. "You let the previous council die during Sovereign's attack on the Citadel. They feel you'll always put human interests before galactic concerns. Rumors that you're working with Cerberus haven't helped. What are you doing out there?"

She sighed and gave him the truth. "Cerberus seems to be the only group who cares about our missing colonists."

"I feel for those colonists, Shepard, but they went out to the Terminus Systems to get away from the Alliance. We can't protect them. But you can. Or, at least you're trying to, and I get the sense there's more going on here." His eyes saw right through her, just as they always had.

"The Reapers are moving again, but not through the Geth. It's the Collectors. They're behind the colony abductions," she revealed, hoping he might be spurred to help.

"The Collectors?" he asked thoughtfully. "We hadn't considered that. There's so little data. They've always seemed like a fringe threat. If they're a front for the Reapers, this is big, but even that may not be enough to get the Council off it's tail. Udina and the others have spent the past two years convincing themselves the Reapers don't exist. I tried to get the truth out, but they don't want to see it. It's just easier for them to accept Sovereign as a geth warship."

Was the council blind? "You know the threat the Reapers represent. There must be something you can do."

"It's up to you to stop the Reapers, Shepard. All I've got is a title if you want it. I can reinstate your SPECTRE status. I won't win any popularity contests, but they can't really object. Your title was never officially rescinded when you died. Besides you're still a hero to humanity and the council knows the danger of discounting that."

"Coming from you, it's just as good as the first time," she smiled accepting his offer. She understood that he was backed into a corner by his position.

"I'll try to keep the Council and the Alliance off your back as well. It shouldn't be too hard if you're operating out in the Terminus systems," he said as he typed on his omnitool to reinstate her.

Just then, the door opened behind her and the sight of Udina ruined her day. He cleared his throat having not yet noticed her. "Anderson, we need to talk about..." he paused as his eyes fell on her. "Shepard," he gasped. "What are you doing here?"

"Not used to seeing ghosts, Udina?" she asked, crossing her arms and relaxing into her hips to taunt him.

"I'd... heard you were alive of course, but I didn't expect to see you back on the Citadel. I hope you didn't do anything foolish, Councilor," he grumbled as he glanced back to Anderson who had taken a similar stance to hers. "Like try to arrange a meeting with the Council. There would be serious political ramifications."

"I don't answer to you, Udina. Why don't you go to your office and think about that for a while," Anderson said cooly.

"Of course, _Councilor_ ," Udina spat. "Good day to both of you." He spun on his heel and stalked out.

"Sorry about that," Anderson said when Udina had disappeared. "Udina's never gotten over that fact that I got the Council position instead of him. Sometimes I need to put him in his place."

Shepard shrugged. "Udina's just doing his job." She may not like the man, but she couldn't fault him. As long as Anderson wasn't letting him run the show.

"True enough," Anderson said, moving back to his perch on the balcony. Shepard followed and joined him in leaning on the rail. "He's got his uses. And if you want something done on the Citadel, he knows who can make it happen. Plus, he's always happy to attend all of those formal diplomatic functions I can't be bothered with."

"How have the last couple of years treated you?" Shepard asked seeing the wear and tear in Anderson's eyes.

"Serving on the Council isn't how I planned to spend my twilight years. Sometimes it feels like I'm just beating my head against the wall. Knowing the truth about Sovereign is brutal. It's nightmare stuff. I can't blame others for not wanting to believe it, but I know how important it is so I keep trying. Fighting the good fight, right?"

They stood in silence for a bit, Shepard clinging to the familiarity as long as she could. Finally she sighed. "I should go."

"Of course, Shepard, I understand. I wish I could do more to help you, but if you ever want to talk, I'll be here. Just do me a favor and be careful. You can't trust Cerberus." He warned before giving her another warm hug and letting her go.

"Don't I know it," she agreed as she left the office and headed back to the Ward to meet up with Garrus.

* * *

 

Back on the Normandy, she checked in with Rupert who was ecstatic with his new rations, then she made sure that Mordin was back before going to see where Kasumi had set herself up. "Hey there, Shep!" the tiny thief said, jumping up from the couch in the port lounge where she had spread her things. "We have a lot to do in a few hours."

"A few hours?" Shepard asked, surprised. "What is happening in a few hours?"

"We arrive at Bekenstein so we can attend Donovan Hock's party. When you showed up today, I knew it was fate. I've been waiting for daaaays on the Citadel. You were just in time." Kasumi said, cocking her hips and looking Shepard up and down from beneath her hood.

"Wait, we're doing the heist now?" Shepard asked.

Kasumi shooed her toward a small box sitting on the table beside the couch. Next to it was a ridiculous pair of strappy heels. "Yes, go put that on. I'm pretty sure I got your measurements right. Do you need help doing your makeup?"

Shepard took the dress box as Kasumi shoved it in her hands and tried to protest but she was pushed out of the lounge with a string of curses in Japanese following her. She sighed and took the box up to her quarters. "Commander?" EDI's voice purred over the comms.

"Yes, EDI?" Shepard asked pulling the dress from the box and wrinkling her nose.

"Mr. Moreau wishes to know if the invisible woman is supposed to be on the ship and if we are indeed supposed to be heading to the Boltzmann System?"

Shepard chuckled. "Yes, EDI. Please tell Joker to get going. We need to be there in a few hours apparently."

"Of course, Commander." EDI said, signing off and leaving Shepard to put on the dress and fix herself up for a party.

* * *

 

After returning to the Normandy, Garrus expected Shepard would stay docked at the Citadel for a day or two and pick up some more supplies. When he felt the Normandy jerk as the docking clamps released he frowned, hoping the order he'd made had arrived at Shepard's cabin already. Just to be sure, he punched in a few more calibrations and left the forward battery to head up and find out. It was nearing dinner time anyway and he figured Shepard might be coaxed from her room to the mess to test out some of Rupert's new cooking.

When he arrived on her floor, the door was locked and he frowned. Instead of picking the lock, he knocked tentatively. "Come in!" he heard from deep in the room. "Shit, EDI could you unlock the door?" He waited with a smile in his face as the red interface turned green. He stepped in and couldn't spot Shepard. "I'll be right out," she called from the bathroom. He glanced over at her fish tank and sure enough the few fish he had picked out for her were swimming happily around the glass enclosure. He tapped his talon on the glass and the fish ignored him for the most part. "I've got fish," Shepard said from behind him.

He turned to tell her that he had thought it was silly for her to have an aquarium without fish and he lost all train of thought. She was dressed in less clothing than he'd ever seen her in. Her arms and legs were bare and her collar dipped low to reveal pale white skin that was marred here and there with some of the same marks she bore on her face from the implants Cerberus had used to bring her back to life. The small black dress hugged her body like it had been made just for her. It came to just above her knees and the shoes she was wearing made her stand in a way that accentuated her well toned legs that seemed to go on forever. The shoes also made her taller so she was almost looking him in the eyes. He quickly gathered himself to look at her face after she crossed her arms in the familiar way she always did when she was either embarrassed or annoyed. He figured out quickly that embarrassed was the emotion of choice when her cheeks flushed pinker than usual and she looked down at herself and shuffled her feet. He noticed she had also softly painted her lips and the lids of her eyes with a bit of makeup. "What's the occasion?" he managed to ask after gawking like an idiot for longer than he should have. He'd never thought humans were an attractive people as a whole, but Shepard was making her species look good.

She waved her hand, acting as if she hadn't noticed him staring and said, "I feel so stupid. Kasumi gave me this dress and shoes and told me to put them on, that it was for her heist. I'm not fully convinced that it isn't some sort of prank." She wobbled a few steps in the shoes before gaining her balance.

He flicked his mandibles in thought and then asked. "You're going in alone?"

"It's just a party. I think I can handle myself at a social event... I think." She frowned as if she was actually wondering if that were possible. "I mean, I am going to have my pistol. And I do have my fancy biotics now."

He glanced up and down her again and crossed his arms. "Where exactly are you going to have your pistol, Shepard?"

She clipped her omnitool on to her wrist and looked down at herself again. "I have my fancy biotics now, right?" She grinned sheepishly and flushed again at his scrutiny.

"Do me a favor, Shepard. Stay on comms with me, and be careful, huh?"

She nodded her agreement and held up her hand as if to say 'after you'. Then as she followed him out of the room she asked, "Since when do I have fish?"

He chuckled. "I thought it was a bit odd that there was a giant empty aquarium in your room, so I got you some fish to fill it up."

"Yeah, I guess that was a bit fishy," she said, pressing her lips together while she attempted to keep from laughing.

"That's it, Shepard. We can't be friends anymore. I can't believe you just said that," he said following her onto the elevator.

"I guess when it comes to fish puns, you either sink or swim." She pressed the button for the crew deck.

"Spirits, Shepard. Please stop while you're ahead," he begged, chuckling a bit as he couldn't help himself.

"You've gotta laugh, come on, I'm drowning here, Big Guy." She said, nudging his arm with her elbow.

He couldn't help himself. With that, he burst out laughing and she joined him. They left the elevator still laughing and Kasumi appeared out of thin air. "Lookin' good Shep. What's so funny?"

"A string of really bad puns," Shepard answered, still chuckling.

He patted her bare shoulder and said, "When you get back, we'll have some sushi and talk about the mission." She snorted and he walked off to go and try to take his mind off how good she looked in that dress with his clan colors painted across her nails.

* * *

 

Shepard felt self conscious. She hadn't dressed in anything remotely like this in years. She felt exposed and her only comfort was her omnitool and Garrus' comments in her ear whenever he heard something useful. She wandered through the party trying to look like she belonged. Kasumi had given her the rundown of the heist as they rode over in a rented skycar. She had to get in, find Hock's vault and they would figure out how to break into it. Then they would get into the giant statue of Saren she'd had delivered with all of their weapons and armor packed inside and enter the vault armed to the teeth and steal her old partner's greybox with some extremely sensitive information and valuable personal memories on it. Simple.

Finally as she wandered toward the back of the mansion, she had come across a flight of stairs going down. As she went down, she chuckled at a conversation between a man and a woman nearby that were very grateful that Archangel was dead. "You certainly made a name for yourself, Big Guy," she whispered.

"What can I say, I've got style, Shepard." he said cooly.

She smiled as she walked up on an alcove that opened up into a small room that housed a very well secured door to an elevator and the golden statue of Saren with their things in it. She glared at the statue as Kasumi dropped her tactical cloak to get a look at the security system. Shepard was overwhelmed by the level of security surrounding the vault entrance, but Kasumi seemed excited at the prospect of snooping through Hock's things to find a DNA sample and his password. She sent Shepard off to look for the breaker that controlled the power to the laser grid and disappeared back under her cloak. Shepard discretely scanned the area, following her omnitool as it revealed the trail of wires below the floor. When she got to a bookshelf fireplace, she looked around and saw no one else around. Breathing a sigh of relief she pulled down on the tiki statue that the wires led to and it opened up a cubby in the shelves where a circuit breaker laid waiting for her to overload it. She worked quickly and precisely, careful not to short circuit anything that would set off an alarm and get them caught. "Good job," Kasumi whispered from somewhere nearby. "Now you need to go find Hock and talk him up. We need a voice sample." Shepard nodded and left the breaker, carefully covering up her handiwork. When she spotted Hock, Kasumi spoke over her comm. "Get him talking, I need enough of a sample to fabricate the code. Pull out the charm on this one Shep."

She approached the man and he shook her hand, "Ah, Ms. Gunn. I apologize for the unpleasantness at the door. I hope it wasn't a problem."

She waved her hand, "I understand the security, but who would dare try to break into Donovan Hock's home?" she asked, adding some husky tones to her voice, hoping to fluff the man's ego. Garrus chuckled in her ear.

It certainly worked. He flew off on a tangent about how great it was to be a criminal and how many people were jealous or depended on their kind of people to keep the galaxy spinning. Shepard found it really difficult not to scowl at his superiority complex. She quickly dismissed herself after Kasumi said they had enough of a sample and wandered off to take a break and get control of her disgust. She found herself standing outside of a door just around the corner from the entry and Kasumi told her to stay there for a moment while she hacked the lock. Shepard discretely slipped into the room when the door opened and it closed quickly behind her. "This is Hock's security room," Kasumi said pointing down a short hallway to a second door.

Shepard moved to the door and bypassed the lock herself. When it opened, there were two guards on the other side and she quickly took them out with her biotics in favor of firing a weapon and making noise. She searched the room while Kasumi hacked into the security logs. She found a short note about Hock's affinity for changing his password often. The note also mentioned that the current password was 'Perrugia'. She passed the info to Kasumi who had her own plan for getting into Hock's private room.

After Kasumi helped her charm her way into the bedroom, they collected a slew of samples that they put together to make a large enough sample for the scanner. Back down at the vault door, Kasumi worked her magic while Shepard hit the hidden switch on the statue and the bottom popped out to reveal her armor. She quickly clipped everything on over the skimpy party dress and immediately felt more competent. She was glad that part of this mission was over. They went down in the elevator to a massive vault the likes of which Shepard had never seen. It was full of priceless art from all over the galaxy. She took a moment to be impressed while she followed the signature that the greybox was signaling. At the far end of the room was a massive green head that she recognized as the head of the statue of liberty from Earth. "Holy shit," she whistled. "This is impressive."

"Look at this!" Kasumi said picking up a gun from one of the displays. "The Kassa Locust. This gun killed two Presidents." She admired the weapon and pocketed it and it's mate before moving on.

Shepard homed in on the greybox and Kasumi treated it reverently before beginning to download the contents. While the download commenced, a giant hologram of Hock's face appeared in the middle of the room. "Don't bother Ms. Goto. It's code-locked." his voice boomed.

"Shepard what's happening?" Garrus asked over the comm.

"I think we're caught," she whispered, pulling out her pistol while Hock threatened Kasumi.

Shepard got tired of listening to the man talk. He was about to tell Kasumi how her partner had begged for his life in the end when she decided enough was enough. She lifted her pistol and shot a nearby giant vase to pieces. "NO!" Hock shouted.

"Well, that shut him up," Kasumi quipped as the door on the far end of the room opened and a swarm of guards entered the room. Shepard dove for cover behind one of the display cases and a firefight ensued. Garrus cursed in her ear as she gleefully continued to shoot at Hock's priceless treasures in between shooting the guards. "Oh, not David," Kasumi called out as Shepard aimed for the statue of a naked man. She changed her target and took out a nearby guard who thought he was hiding and not doing a very good job.

"Can't you do anything without it turning into a firefight, Shepard?" Garrus grumbled at her through the earpiece.

"What's the fun in that, Big Guy?" she asked as she scanned the room. All of the guards were down. "Could you get Joker to send in the shuttle, please?" she asked and he cursed again in Turian.

"You don't have an escape shuttle?" he asked.

"Oops," she said innocently as she jogged to the next room only to be met by more guards and a heavy mech. "Drop it's shields," she called to Kasumi who had released a drone to distract the mech while they took it down piece by piece.

Garrus went quiet as they fought through the compound to the landing pad. Kasumi was extremely efficient in a fight, dancing all around the field dropping in and out of her cloak and always making sure she was not in the way of any of Shepard's shots. It must have been infuriating to be on the other team. They made short work of Hock's hired mercenaries and made it out to the landing pad in record time only to be assaulted by Hock himself in a heavily armed and armored gunship. Shepard took down its shields with her overload only to have it disappear before she could get a shot off with her grenade launcher. They fought off some more mercs and when the gunship reappeared, the shields were back in place. "I have an idea," Kasumi said. "Watch my back. I need a clear path to the ship."

Shepard gunned down anything she saw between Kasumi and the gunship. The girl ninja'd her way up a collection of boxes and pipes, scaring away a flock of birds and then jumped onto the top of the ship. Shepard gawked before remembering there were enemies still on the ground. Her shields took a few hits and she ducked back down behind a crate for cover. Kasumi used a short range overload that she touched directly to the shield generator on top of the ship. The ship's shields flickered and died. Shepard shot a few more mercs while Kasumi gave Hock a snarky salute before back flipping from the ship and landing like a superhero from a vid. Shepard had to admit that the girl was very impressive. Having Kasumi on her team was going to be a very good thing.

Once they took down the gun ship with Hock on board, Shepard glanced around, making sure there were no more mercs lying in wait for them. Then she spotted the Normandy's shuttle hovering toward the landing pad. She and Kasumi made their way over and Shepard was surprised when the hatch opened up to see Garrus standing there with his arms crossed. "Still in one piece, Shepard?" he asked sourly.

"You have such little faith in me, Big Guy," she said pouting as she took his hand and he pulled her up into the shuttle.

"Well, the last time I left you alone, you died," he said matter-of-factly.

"That was _one_ time," she complained.

"One time that you will never live down," he smirked.

He made his way back to the front of the shuttle to pilot them back to the Normandy and Kasumi cradled her partner's greybox against her chest. "What's on that?" Shepard asked softly as Kasumi plugged it into the shuttle's dock and activated a visor over her eyes to see the images imprinted on the memory.

"Memories," Kasumi said, moving back and forth in the virtual world she was seeing.

A man's voice spoke about a secret that would implicate the Alliance in something terrible. He begged Kasumi to destroy the evidence, even though it was imprinted on his memories. She hugged a virtual person and then sat down on the bench, hunched over in sadness. "Is there any way to destroy the evidence without getting rid of the memories, too?" Shepard asked, realizing that if it had been someone she had loved, she would not have wanted to make that choice.

"No," Kasumi said. "Keiji was a master encrypter. The evidence and his memories are intertwined. You can't separate the two."

Shepard thought, biting her lip. It wasn't fair to ask Kasumi to destroy the only thing she had left of the man she'd loved. "Keep the greybox, but you have to be ready to live with the consequences of whatever information is in those files."

"I am Shep. After your mission is done, I will fall off the grid. No one will ever hear from me again." She smiled at Shepard, only her lips visible after she shut off the light of the virtual reality. "That is if I survive your mission, of course."

"I don't plan on letting anyone die on my watch," Shepard assured her.

 


	14. Biotics and Baby Krogan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard continues to follow the dossiers from the Illusive Man.

It was two weeks travel time to the Prison Ship Purgatory where the convict biotic waited for her to come pick him up. 'Jack' was reportedly a loose cannon and Shepard was wondering whether it was really worth it to gain a biotic. When she addressed her concerns to Miranda, she assured her that if the name was on the list that the person was worth it. "The Illusive Man does nothing without purpose, Shepard."

When they docked with the Prison, Her, Garrus and Mordin were greeted by a group of guards that demanded they relinquish their weapons. "I'll relinquish one bullet," Shepard threatened, pulling her gun. "Where do you want it?"

They stood for a few tense moments everyone pointing their guns at everyone else until a bare faced Turian showed up and told them to stand down. He introduced himself as Warden Kuril and when Shepard still refused to give up her gun, he relented, allowing her the small comfort of her weapons. She was wary of a Turian who refused to show his familial colors. Her resignations were confirmed by the soft growl in Garrus' chest.

He led them through the ship, speaking proudly about the security of his facility and his own tendency to space prisoners to make an example to the others. Shepard shuddered at the mere thought and she felt Garrus move a bit closer behind her as they walked. She was grateful for the support. "Do you ever have escape attempts?" Garrus asked, his curiosity piquing her own.

"We're in space. They have no where to go and they know it, but that doesn't mean some haven't tried," Kuril explained. He led them a little further and then directed them down another hall, leaving them to check that the funds from Cerberus had cleared.

They passed by a row of cells where they saw a guard shamelessly beating an inmate. "You don't even get good information that way. After a point, victims admit to anything to make the pain stop," Garrus grumbled over her shoulder.

"Inhumane. Unacceptable. Violation of basic organic dignity," Mordin seethed.

Shepard forced herself to watch knowing that there was nothing she could do, but turning away was disrespectful. They passed by and her fists clenched. She was really starting to hate this place and they'd only just arrived. She wanted to get Jack and go. They followed Kuril's directions and were shown to a door to out-processing by a doctor in a lab coat. When the door opened up, Shepard took a moment to figure out why they were looking into a small confined space that looked like a cell. "Son-of-a-bitch," she grumbled just before Kuril's voice came over the loudspeaker.

"My apologies, Shepard. You're more valuable as a prisoner than a customer. Drop your weapons and proceed into this open cell. You will not be harmed."

"Go to hell!" she shouted angrily. No body was going to lock her up. "I'll send you there myself."

"Activate Systems!" Kuril shouted as he realized she wasn't going to go quietly.

He sent guards and mechs at them to try and contain the situation, but his attitude made Shepard's blood boil. She hated him preaching about noble intentions and then double dealing. He was no better than the Batarian slavers that had destroyed her home. "We need to get out of here, Shepard," Garrus said as the wave of guards died down.

"I'm not leaving here without Jack. We need to get to cryo." They followed the signs on the walls pointing them to the control room for the cell block, killing anyone who got in their way.

By the time she reached the button to release Jack, she was in no mood to dawdle. "If you push that button it will release every prisoner in this unit," Garrus warned.

"Though necessary if you wish to release Jack," Mordin added.

"I'm doing it. Be ready," she said slamming her palm down on the button.

They watched as the cryo release activated. A giant mechanical claw reached down and plucked a pod from its place. The pod lifted and spun, opening with a release of pressure to reveal the prisoner. "That's Jack?" Garrus asked in disbelief.

Jack was a tiny wisp of a girl dressed in baggy cargo pants, combat boots and little else but tattoos from the waist up. Her head was shaved bald, accentuating her sharp facial features and thick lips. The girl's eyes flew open and she almost immediately started to struggle as she realized where she was. She showed exceptional strength, snapping open her wrist restraints in seconds then using her bare hands to rip the thick metal neck restraint that held her in position while she had been frozen. Still thawing, she rubbed at her face while the three heavy mechs that were realizing something was amiss turned to look at her. The mechs raised their arms to subdue Jack and the tiny girl shot from her pod and disappeared under the room where Shepard and the others were watching. "Let's get down there," Shepard said as a loud booming crash and the sound of ripping metal sounded below them.

Garrus and Mordin followed her down to the room where Jack had been released. When the door opened, Shepard's jaw fell open. There was little left of the mechs but smoking heaps of metal and a giant hole was ripped in the far wall leading to a hallway where red emergency lights flashed. Shepard jogged to the hallway and followed the path of destruction trying to catch up with Jack. When they made it out to one of the cell blocks, all of the prisoners were loose, just as Garrus had warned and there was a full scale war going on between them and the guards. It was hard to track Jack in the chaos while being shot at from every direction. They fought their way through, cell block after cell block. Finally they came to the open area below where the hallway to the Normandy hovered. Kuril was waiting for them, set up behind a heavy duty shield that was self replicating and powered by three nodes spread around the room.

He took a shot at Shepard, hitting her shields. "You're valuable Shepard. I could have sold you and lived like a king!" He shouted as he fired another round toward where she had ducked. "But you're too much trouble. At least I can recapture Jack!"

"Not happening!" Shepard shouted as Garrus growled over the comms. "You're a two bit slave trader and I don't have time for it!" She peeked around her cover, repositioning herself to get a better sight line on the closest power node.

"I do the hard things civil governments are unwilling to! This is for the good of the galaxy!" Kuril shouted, trying to justify himself and the immoral actions he condoned in the prison. Shepard felt her heart-rate rising with anger. She'd almost been taken by slavers before. Damned if, now that she was a trained soldier, she would let him kill her because he couldn't control her. She reached around her cover to aim at the node, but Garrus was a step ahead of her. He took aim with his sniper rifle and blew the node. It closed down and one of the snaking trails of energy to Kuril's shield dissipated.

She spotted another and also a load of guards swarming her next bit of cover on the catwalk. Calling her biotics, she charged forward and unleashed one of her massive waves of energy, knocking the guards all back and killing a few in the process. She slammed herself into cover before Kuril could take aim at her. One of the nearby guards was recovering and she simultaneously drained her biotics by hitting him with a warp field and starting up her overload program to take out the second power node. She glanced around and made sure her people were handling themselves while the overload charged. Garrus looked fierce, his mandibles tucked close to his face as he slowly scoped each of his targets and dropped them with ruthless efficiency. Glad to have him back at her six for a real fight, she found Mordin who was bobbing his head to some tune only he could hear and incinerating guards left and right with a new omnitool upgrade he must have picked up from the Citadel.

She overloaded the node and it shut down, destroying another of Kuril's snaking lines of protection. Checking her clip, she rolled out of cover to try and get closer to the last power node. As she sprinted along the catwalk, closer to Kuril, she was peppered with enemy fire. Fear spiked as she heard the tell tale sound of broken glass as her shields had enough. They fell, leaving her exposed. She ran as quickly as she could, but Kuril had been tracking her. He took advantage of his modded barrel and unloaded a single high powered shot from his rifle. It clipped her in the side, ripping a hole through her armor in the soft spot just below her chest plate. She gritted her teeth as she recovered from the high impact shot, closing her fist around the sensors in her suit that she had installed that would release medigel automatically to any injury she had. The cooling gel slipped over the bleeding orifice in her side and she dropped into cover before Kuril could wing her again. "Shepard!" Garrus called over the comms.

"I'm fine," she hissed as she knelt and the shift in her body pulled at the wound. "Get that damn shield down so I can kill this asshole."

Moments later, she saw Garrus vault over his cover and find a closer spot to the node. She breathed around the pain in her side and risked a glance at the node. She watched it explode as Garrus followed her order. She called up her overload again as Kuril realized they had taken out his first line of defense. His personal armor shields still stood around him and he kept wasting shots in Shepard's direction. She was pinned down. If she even peeked out from her cover, he would blow her head off. Her omnitool beeped it's readiness and she reached up, firing blind in Kuril's general direction. She heard him grunt as the overload hit its mark damaging his shields and overheating his gun. She was free to move. She stood from cover and limped closer, firing several shots from her pistol into his armor. Each shot jarred her injury and she winced, finding more cover before he got his gun to work again. An incinerate flashed over her head and she saw it hit him in the chest leaving a hole in his armor. The next thing she knew, he was blown backwards by a high impact shot from close range. Garrus was moving toward her as Kuril took his last breaths. She stood, inspecting the area. He was at her side in moments. "Shepard. You're hurt."

"I'll be alright. We need to get Jack," she saw the biotic in question running full speed down the corridor above and killing the door guards who had tried to take their weapons.

Before she could move, Mordin stopped her and took a scan with his omnitool. "Through and through. Clean. Efficient. Cybernetics compensating, medigel applied. Should be fine."

"That's what I've been saying," she repeated, pushing past the concerned Turian as he rumbled concern in his subvocals. "Come on, before our crazy person gets away."

When they reached Jack, she was having a full on temper tantrum. She didn't see the final guard approaching her and Shepard took a shot past Jack, dropping the guard. "What the hell do you want?" Jack shouted as she realized Shepard might be on her side.

"I just saved your ass," Shepard spat, her side paining her. She was ready to go and was not in the mood for childish pissing contests.

"He was already dead. He just didn't know it. Now, what the hell do you want?" Jack repeated.

"My name is Shepard and I'm here to get you off this ship," Shepard offered.

"I'm not going anywhere with you. You're Cerberus."

"I'm offering to be your friend. You don't wanna be my enemy," Shepard threatened, realizing that was the only way to get through whatever psychological walls this girl had built.

"They have a way of dying," Garrus added, still eyeing Shepard warily as if she was going to fall over.

"You show up in a Cerberus frigate to take me away somewhere. You think I'm stupid?" Jack asked, eyeing Shepard and taking in everything she saw, including her weak spot.

"This ship is going down in flames. I've got the only way out," Shepard crossed her arms over her chest and sunk into her hip. "I'm offering to take you with me and you're arguing."

"We could knock her out," Garrus said with a smirk.

"I'd like to see you try," Jack growled, her biotics glowing softly in a halo around her.

Shepard held up a hand. "Nobody's going to hurt her."

"Good move," she said, the glow slightly dimming. "Look you want me to come with you, make it worth my while."

"Tell me what you're thinking," Shepard said dropping her arms and stepping closer to the girl.

"I bet your ship's got lots of Cerberus databases. I wanna look at those files, see what Cerberus has got on me," Jack said, glaring at Shepard and challenging her to deny the terms. "You want me on your team, let me go through those databases."

"I'll give you full access," Shepard agreed, curious herself about what Jack might find out about Cerberus.

"You better be straight up with me," Jack threatened, sticking a heavily tattooed finger in Shepard's face. Shepard nodded and Jack glanced back out the window at the Normandy. "So why the hell are we standing here?"

"Move out," Shepard ordered. She pressed her fingers into the medigel dispenser again to get through the next few minutes while they got Jack settled. She needed to be there personally for this one, or she had a feeling things would go badly.

They made their way to the comm room once on board and Miranda was waiting. "Shepard. Is everything okay?"

"I'll be fine. We just need to have a talk with Jack here," she said as Jack followed her into the brightly lit room.

"Welcome to the Normandy, Jack," Miranda said, sizing up the slip of a girl and scowling. "I'm Miranda, Shepard's second in command." Shepard frowned at Miranda's assumption and Miranda continued. "On this ship, we follow orders."

"Tell the Cerberus cheerleader to back off, Shepard. I'm here because of _our_ deal," Jack said, gracing Miranda with her own disapproving scowl.

Shepard sighed. "Miranda will let you into the system. Let me know what you find."

"You hear that, precious. We're going to be friends," Jack said in a mocking singsong tone. "You, me and every embarrassing little secret." She turned away from Miranda and said to Shepard. "You should get patched up. I'll be reading down in the hold, or somewhere near the bottom. I don't like a lot of through traffic. Keep your people off me." She started to the exit without so much as a second glance. "Better that way."

When she had disappeared, Miranda shot Shepard an icy glare. "The Illusive Ma...."

Shepard cut her off with a raise of her hand. "Save it Miranda. I'm really not in the mood for a Cerberus lecture." She pressed her hand over the wound in her side hissing.

Miranda was silent for a moment then approached Shepard. "May I?"

Shepard nodded. The woman had been responsible for her resurrection. She was more than qualified to take a look at her brand new injury. Pulling her hand away, Shepard let Miranda prod at her side. "I don't feel nearly as bad as I should. Mordin said it was a through and through?"

Miranda nodded. "Yes, but remember, Shepard, you've received some top of the line upgrades to your nervous system. You will heal much more quickly than before because of your cybernetics. The application of medigel will also speed the process by stopping the bleeding, which is why you aren't leaving a trail of blood behind you, or passing out. I recommend you go see Dr. Chakwas and get some shots to be certain you don't get an infection, but the wound is already closing over nicely."

She stood from her crouch in front of Shepard and offered a smile, all trace of her disapproval over Jack gone. Shepard thanked her and left the comm room to go to the med bay.

* * *

 

Shepard sat in the mess a few hours later after a slew of injections, and more medigel covered by a bandage. Chakwas had warned her to be sure she ate enough to make up for the energy her body was expending to heal her up so quickly. She had showered and sent her armor for repair then went straight for the mess. Their next stop to pick up Okeer was a little over a month's journey away so she radioed EDI to be sure that Joker got them on course before turning in for the night.

Shepard was enjoying a plate of chicken parmesan that she had to admit, Rupert did a fine job of preparing, when Garrus appeared in the door way of the main battery. He was making his way toward the kitchen when he spotted her. He immediately changed course and headed straight for her. It was late and they were alone in the mess. "Shepard? What the hell are you doing out of the med bay?" he asked stopping short across the table from her.

"Eating dinner?" she said coyly while he studied her with narrowed eyes. "Chakwas released me." she said, shrugging.

"Sure she did. Shepard, you just took a through and through gut shot. I watched you a few years ago nearly die from a shoulder wound. You can't tell me you're fine," he scolded.

She set her fork down calmly and tapped her fingers on the table. "Oh I'm sorry, 'Mr. Rocket to the face walking around after 6 hours in surgery', but you can ask Chakwas yourself. My cybernetics have nearly closed over the wound already. You can see if you want."

He watched her tap her fingers in annoyance and growled. "Dammit, Shepard. How can I watch your six if you're going to be pulling stunts like that biotic charge you keep whipping out. You need to warn me. I'm not used to your new body language. It... worries me... when I lose sight of you." He sat down in the chair he had been leaning over, his anger fading to stress. He rubbed his hands over his fringe like she would run fingers through her hair when she was worried or frustrated. He'd picked up so many human traits from her.

She smiled and reached her hand across the table. He took the hint, laying one of his in it. She squeezed it gently. "Look, I'm fine, Big Guy. I promise. I understand that I died and that was rough... for everyone, but I swear I am being as careful as I always have been. I don't plan on taking the plunge again."

He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles, his head hung in thought. "I can't..." he let his next words fall on air, unsaid as his mandibles clicked. She watched him briefly, but couldn't make out whatever emotions he was dealing with. His cybernetic bandage blinked noiselessly as it helped to heal the damage to his face. She had a flawless view of the scars as they sat in silence. They spread out from underneath the bandage where the damage was the worst, spider-webbing his whole cheek and down his neck. There was even torn skin on some of his mandible and lips. Luckily the damage had not reached his eye. Those intense blue eyes that she knew could be so soft and full of humor. She shuddered and forced herself to look away before he caught her staring.

She pulled her hand away from his and picked up her fork. "Why don't you grab a bite and join me," she offered. Just then, she heard the elevator door resound through the empty deck as it came open. Jack crept from around the wall and almost immediately upon spotting them turned to leave. "Jack!" Shepard called after her. "Please, join us. Garrus doesn't bite."

The girl stopped and hesitated, turning to glance at them both. "You're the one who threatened to knock me out," she said, narrowing her eyes at Garrus. Shepard was ready to step in and diffuse the situation when Jack surprised her by completely turning her body to move toward them and said with a grin. "You've got balls, Turian." Shepard snorted, digging into her pasta as Jack moved toward the kitchen. "You know, Shepard, you're one tough bitch. Didn't think you'd be out of medical yet." She proceeded to rummage through the cabinets and grab boxes of snacks, hugging them against her to make room for more.

"There's plenty there," Shepard pointed out. "You don't need to cram it all in at once, you know."

Jack shrugged as she came back toward the table. "When you don't know where your next meal is coming from, you learn to get while you can."

Shepard nodded and Garrus stood to get his own food. "So have you found anything useful yet in those files?"

"Nothing yet. Cerberus keeps some fucked up records. Seems like one arm doesn't know whose balls the other arm is fondling," she shrugged, shoving a handful of crackers in her mouth. "But I'll find something sooner or later. You seem to have a bug up your ass about Cerberus. What's your issue with them?"

"We may be working together for the greater good, but I don't work for them and I don't trust the Illusive Man as far as Garrus could throw him," Shepard admitted, taking another bite of her dinner. Bonding over mutual distrust was one way to break the ice with Jack. If it worked, Shepard would feel much better about having the girl who could rip through three YMIR mechs like they were tissue paper on her ship.

Garrus chuckled from his place in the kitchen while he dug into something dextro based. "I'm pretty sure I can throw him further than you'd imagine, Shepard."

"Maybe some day, you'll get the chance, Big Guy."

The rest of the meal was spent with Shepard mostly trying to pry anything from Jack about herself. It was like eroding a mountain with a water gun. At least when she went to bed Shepard felt like Jack was at least willing to be more amiable with her and Garrus. Even if the rest of the crew would be a challenge.

* * *

 

By the time they reached Korlus, Shepard's side was completely healed and not a single scar marred her skin where it had been ripped open a mere month beforehand. The dossier on Okeer was exceedingly thin on information. Shepard had no clue what she and her team were walking into. Garrus was already outfitted when she called over comms to collect him. Jack came to the shuttle bay in zero armor and carrying a shotgun. Shepard raised her brows at the biotic, but Jack seemed confident, so Shepard brushed it off.

They landed on the trash heap of a planet just outside of a bunker that reportedly housed a Blue Suns offshoot group. The first few meters past the LZ were deserted. Shepard felt uneasy. It was almost too quiet. Then she heard a woman's voice over a loudspeaker spouting threats and other 'motivational' B.S. that Garrus scoffed at. "Someone likes the sound of their own voice."

"Stay focused," she scolded, unable to shake the uneasy feeling she had about the place.

After what seemed like an eternity of sneaking through a maze of blind corners and giant empty shipping containers that made up the compound, they finally came across a group of mercs in Blue Suns uniforms. They made short work of the unsuspecting mercs and Shepard found one still alive. She walked over to him as he cursed about bleeding out. "It doesn't look that bad, actually," Garrus commented quietly.

"Well, he doesn't need to know that," she said. She knelt by the merc, grabbing his attention. "I've got an application of medigel ready, unless you want me to keep walking." She held up her active omnitool, flashing it in his face. The young merc told her everything she needed to know and then some, even going so far as to redirect some of the others when they called in for a report. She smiled and shut down her omnitool. "Good, if you leave now, you might just find a shady spot before you bleed out."

The merc shuffled off, cursing her. "Funny," Jack mused.

"I thought so," she said grinning and backhanding Garrus' chest before taking off to move further into the compound.

After that first wave, it was like someone had wrung a dinner bell. Mercs poured all over the complex. Jack's biotics were helpful, pulling a lot of them off of their higher ground before they could get any good shots in. They came across a Krogan who spoke with little intelligence and Shepard soon found out why. He told them that he had been there seven night cycles. "Seven days?" Garrus said in surprise.

"Okeer must be breeding them full grown," she mused.

The Krogan explained that the way to the 'glass mother' was up past 'many of you fleshy things', then he took a giant piece of thick metal and tossed it aside to let them into the compound.. "Glad he's friendly," Garrus whispered and she silently agreed. The metal must have weighed two tons and he had tossed it aside without flinching.

Inside, they were waylaid by not only more mercs, but more tank bred Krogan who were not so friendly as the other. It took a combination of hers and Jack's biotics to create warp fields strong enough to disrupt the Krogans' regenerative properties so Garrus could shoot them down. Shepard was sweating and her head ached by the time they reached the stairs leading up. Jack seemed unphased. Her biotics were much better honed than Shepard's. It was humbling. Luckily, there were no more Krogan in sight as they fought through several levels of the compound to reach the lab and Okeer.

A most unwelcome sight came in the form of Rana Thanoptis, whom Shepard recognized from Saren's Krogan lab on Virmire. What was with the Asari and bad decisions involving Krogan? After a short conversation that made Shepard's head hurt worse, the woman ran off and promised to turn over a new leaf. Past the next door, they found an extremely old, battle worn Krogan. "It's about time. The batteries on these tanks will not wait while you play with these idiotic mercs." he said in a gravely voice. Beside him stood a giant tank with a single Krogan specimen floating, asleep in an amniotic like substance.

Shepard narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms. "I take it you're Okeer. You don't seem particularly caged... or grateful that I'm here."

"You may claim to be here to help, but the formerly deceased Shepard is not a sign of gentle change," he finally turned to face her as she dropped her defensive posture. "Surprised? All Krogan should know you. I'm sure Rana had already revisited your actions on Virmire," he continued smugly.

"I make no apologies. It was the most efficient solution," Shepard sighed with roll of her eyes. Even Wrex had agreed in the end.

"Oh, but I approve," Okeer said, raising his hands in front of him to clear the air of her assumption that he was angry with her. "Saren's pale horde were not true Krogan. Numbers alone are nothing. The mistake of an outsider, one that these mercenaries have also made." He walked over to the large window that looked down on his lab full of tanks, gesturing wide. "I gave their leader my rejects for her army, but she grows impatient. It's time for you to take me out of here."

"Yeah, don't care." Jack said. "We're here about Collectors."

"I see," Okeer turned back to face them. "Yes, Collector attacks have increased. A human concern. My requests were focused elsewhere." He moved to reverently gaze at the tank beside them. The sleeping Krogan inside was strange looking he did not have a solid forehead plate like she was used to seeing. Instead his plates were in stone like pieces, spread across a rounded head that continued into his hump. He was impressive in size and she wondered what was so special about this one Krogan that Okeer had secluded to his work space, away from the so called, 'rejects'. "I acquired the knowledge to create one pure soldier. With that, I will inflict upon the genophage the greatest insult an enemy can suffer. To be ignored."

Shepard considered the warlord before her. She needed all of the people she could get and he had dealings with the Collectors. "Your methods are extreme, but you know how to deconstruct a threat. Will you help us?"

"Perhaps I can strike a deal to secure passage, but my prototype is not negotiable. It is the key to my legacy," Okeer mused as the loudspeaker boomed overhead.

"Attention! I have traced the Krogan release. Okeer, of course. I'm calling 'blank slate' on this project. Gas these commandos and start over from Okeer's data. Flush the tanks!"

Okeer growled as all of the tanks, including his 'pure legacy' began to hiss as the leader's orders were carried out. "She's that weak willed? She'll kill my legacy with a damned valve!" He spun to glare at them. "Shepard! You want information on the Collectors? Stop her. She'll try to access contaminants in the storage bay."

"You could just start over, like she plans to. What's the big deal?" Shepard asked, trying to understand.

"This tank is pure. It involved as much trial as data. Starting over will not duplicate it. It must survive. Jedore will be with the rejected tanks. Kill her, I will... stay and do what must be done."

Shepard was suspicious, but she needed the information Okeer had. She ordered her team down to the lab. It was hard fought. The woman Jedore threw wave after wave of angry rejected Krogan specimens at them at the same time she released her heavy mech. There was little cover in the area and Shepard released as many overloads in a row as she could to help Garrus in taking down the YMIR's sheilds while trying to avoid gunfire and charging Krogan. Her shotgun proved useful in getting the Krogan off her back when they got too close. More than once she had to take cover behind one of the tanks while her shields charged back up from too much abuse. The lack of real cover was nerve-wracking and just before Jedore fell under a warp field from Jack and the YMIR exploded as Garrus hit it with a head shot, alarms from the upstairs lab sounded shrilly.

"What the hell is that Krogan doing?" Garrus shouted over the din.

"Shepard, the lab alarms coincided with a systems failure. The remaining lab systems are unprotected and I have gained limited access," EDI said over Shepard's comms. "According to lab scanners, the room is flooded with toxins, and Okeer's personal life signs are failing rapidly. I recommend haste."

"Dammit!" Shepard raced back up to the lab as the computer announced that emergency venting was in progress.

As she entered the room, Okeer fell to his knees. "You gave me time, Shepard. If I knew why the Collectors wanted humans, I would tell you." She realized as the Krogan died that his voice was not coming from him, but from the console beside the tank. He had prerecorded his confession before killing himself to save the prototype. "But everything is in my prototype. My legacy is pure. This... one soldier, this grunt. Perfect."

Shepard slammed her fist onto the console in frustration. They had done all of this for nothing. She backed away and looked up at the 'pure' Krogan. Why was this thing worth so much? "Crack it open. Let's see what pure Krogan's got," Jack suggested.

"A pure Krogan could pack a hell of a punch," Shepard agreed. She felt the need to make up for the loss of Okeer and his information. "We can always use another heavy hitter." Garrus seemed to agree as he stared at the tank too. "Normandy? Okeer is a no go, but we have a package that needs retrieval. And he's a big one."

 

Back on the Normandy, Shepard listened while Jacob and Miranda argued over what to do with the package. "Bringing the Krogan for study makes sense, but I have concerns about waking it." Miranda said calmly.

"Yeah, you've said that a few times now," Jacob said with annoyance in his voice.

"A normal Krogan is dangerous. This one was created, and likely educated, by a madman." Miranda countered.

Shepard interrupted, crossing her arms. "I see everyone's enjoying the new paperweight. Concerns?"

"We don't know anything about it, Commander," Miranda repeated.

"I know," Shepard grinned. "You don't find that interesting?"

Jacob shook his head in amusement as Miranda continued. "Krogan fight well at close quarters. Perhaps awakening him in a confined space wouldn't be prudent."

"Noted," Shepard said uncrossing her arms and standing straighter. "The cargo hold is safe enough while I decide what to do with him."

The others left, accepting her orders without further bickering. Shepard had to admit she was curious. She immediately took the elevator down to the cargo hold to get a look at the tank. "The subject is stable, Shepard. Integration with on board systems was seamless." EDI chirped helpfully.

"What can you tell me about this guy? Anything unusual?" She asked as she stared at the sleeping Krogan.

EDI read off a list of the Krogan's attributes, attesting to its physical perfection aside from the genophage genetic markers. "I cannot judge mental functioning,"she concluded with a bit of wariness in her voice.

"Any idea how dangerous this guy is?" she asked, addressing the tone EDI had taken.

"He is a Krogan, Shepard. If you are asking whether he is actively hostile, I don't have the necessary data to answer," It was said as if the answer were obvious. "Okeer's technology could impart data, not methods of thinking. The subject may know of his views, but would not necessarily share them."

It had to be a strange existence. Suddenly, Shepard felt uneasy. They had transported him somewhere that he had no knowledge of. It could be traumatizing to be woken up in a potentially hostile environment. She knew the feeling. "Can he see anything in there? Does he know where he is?"

"Unlikely. Current neural patterns indicate minimal cognition. Barring ship-wide power loss, the nutrients in the tank could sustain him for over a year." EDI seemed to be leaning personally toward leaving the Krogan in the tank as Miranda had.

Shepard was too curious, and she felt sympathy for the Krogan. "Stand by. I'm going to open the tank and let him out."

"Cerberus protocol is very clear regarding untested alien technology," EDI warned.

"He's either a powerful addition to the crew or a time bomb. I'd rather deal with it now," Shepard insisted, readying her pistol at her hip.

"Very well Shepard," EDI said as if she wanted to sigh. "The controls are online. The switch... and consequences, are yours."

Shepard activated her omnitool and inputted the necessary protocols to open the tank. The fluids began to flush from the system, back into the storage container on the back of the tank. The Krogan sank from where he had been floating and settled on his feet then fell forward choking as the glass door flew open, exposing him to the world. Shepard backed up as he finished his fit, hacking up some of the fluid that he had been swimming in and his eyes blinked open. She took in the shocking icy blue color of them as he stood. He was small for a Krogan, but still towered over her by a few feet. She forced herself forward, back toward him, in a display of fearlessness. He blinked at her for a moment getting his bearings and then without warning, he lunged.

He slammed her against the wall across the room having gotten there in seconds. The air was knocked from her lungs and he pinned her by her neck in mid air. Still she managed to pull her gun and with her free arm tuck it between them as he spoke, distracted by what he was doing and not paying attention to his surroundings. "Human. Female." He identified her in a deep rumbling voice that echoed loudly in the hold. "Before you die, I need a name."

She gripped the slippery armor on his forearm that held her aloft, relieving some of the pressure on her windpipe so she could speak. "I'm Commander Shepard and I don't take threats lightly. I suggest you relax," she said with as much bluster as she could manage after recovering from the impact against the wall.

"Not your name. Mine," he corrected. "I am trained. I know things, but the tank... Okeer couldn't implant connection. His words are hollow. Warlord, legacy, grunt... grunt. 'Grunt' was among the last. It has no meaning. It'll do. I am Grunt. If you are worthy of your command, prove your strength and try to destroy me." He pushed against her again, his eyes never leaving hers in a display of challenge.

"You wouldn't prefer 'Okeer'? Or 'Legacy'?" she said, almost taunting him to see how serious he was about fighting her.

"It's short. Matches the training in my blood. The other words are big things I don't feel. Maybe they fit your mouth better. I feel nothing for Okeer's clan or his enemies. I will do what I am bred to do, fight and determine the strongest, but his imprint has failed. Without a reason that's mine, one fight is as good as any other. Might as well start with you."

Shepard felt he needed that connection. She opted to try to appeal to his Krogan side and said something she may have said to Wrex. "I have a good ship and a strong crew, a strong clan. You'd make it stronger."

He seemed to consider as he spoke. "If you're weak and choose weak enemies, I'll have to kill you."

"Our enemies are worthy. No doubt about that," she insisted.

After a few grunts of thought, making him worthy of his chosen name, he said, "That's... acceptable. I'll fight for you."

"I'm glad you saw reason," she said letting out a sigh and nudging him with the muzzle of her gun to draw his attention.

He looked down and saw the weapon, "Hmm? Ha! Offer one hand, but arm the other. Wise, Shepard." He pulled his arm away and she dropped to her feet, putting away the pistol. "If I find a clan, if I find what I... I want. I will be honored to eventually pit them against you."

She took that as it was given and allowed him to stalk off and go about his business of learning his place.

* * *

 

She started her rounds, down on the engineering deck, since she was already there. Zaeed and Jack were just about as talkative as usual and it didn't take long before she was heading back up to the CIC deck. She rolled her shoulder, the usual stiffness from the time she was shot on Therum creeping up on her as the day wound to an end. Being roughed up by a super soldier Krogan hadn't helped. She stopped in to see Mordin first, chatting more about his time with STG. He had revealed a few weeks ago that he had worked on a modification to the genophage during his time there. The Krogan had been showing signs of evolving past the issue and the population was increasing. He and his team had worked to correct the 'problem'. She didn't quite agree that it was a problem, but she didn't insult him to his face by demeaning his work. They talked for a few minutes while she checked out some potential upgrade requisitions on the computer. Ever since they'd opened up the lab when Mordin arrived, several of the crew had suggested upgrades to either weapons, armor, or even the ship itself. Some of them were truly ingenious. She noticed one that Garrus had put in to upgrade the Thanix Cannon. Of course he would be the one to increase their fire power. She approved the requisition to set the project in motion. Mordin seemed to be absorbed in his work, forgetting she was there, so she left the lab to go down the short hallway to the armory where she normally found Jacob.

Jacob was doing sit ups without a shirt and she took a moment to admire the view before clearing her throat and leaning against the table he used to clean and do maintenance on weapons, crossing her arms. "Commander, hey," he said, stopping his workout and getting up off the floor.

"So, the Krogan is free," she informed him.

"Oh, yeah?" he smirked picking up a shirt, using it to rub sweat from his face and then pulling it on over his head. "How'd that go?"

"Apparently he's named himself Grunt and someday he would be honored to pit his clan against me... When he finds one that is," she said flapping her hand as she spoke.

"So a typical day for Commander Shepard, huh?" he joked.

"That about sums it up, yeah," she agreed. "Everything good over here in the armory?"

"I've got no complaints," he said.

"Okay then, I should go," she said pushing away from the table. "I'll see you around."

Her next stop was Joker where she diffused an argument between him and EDI in regards to him smearing grease on the cockpit cameras. "It's just mad that all of it's footage of me looks like a dream sequence," he grumbled under his breath as she left the bridge shaking her head.

Kelly had a word or two for her in regards to Grunt being a complete unknown and to be careful. She smiled and nodded through the conversation, rolling her shoulder again as it continued to bother her. Kelly finally let her go and she jumped on the elevator to head to the crew deck for the last of her rounds. She stopped in at the Port observation to see Kasumi first then moved on to Miranda who was less than chatty, still sore because Shepard had pulled rank over opening Grunt's tank. Lastly, she made her way to the Main Battery to see Garrus. "Hey Shepard, need me for something?" he asked as he tapped away at the console.

"I saw your upgrade in the system. Thought you should know I pushed it through," she said.

He turned to glance at her between his calibrations and she happened to be rolling her shoulder again. "Did you get hurt on Korlus?" he asked.

"Hmm? Oh, no." She shook the arm out, flexing her fingers. "Grunt aggravated my shoulder when he shoved me against the wall."

"Grunt?" he asked leaving his calibrations to get a better look at her. "May I?" he asked apparently seeing something peeking out from her shirt.

"The Krogan," she nodded, letting him pull her shirt down to see her neck and collar bone. "He was a little confused and a bit ragey when I let him out of the tank."

"You let him out?" Garrus asked, prodding at a sore spot on her shoulder.

"Ow," she complained pulling away.

"This is bruised pretty good, Shepard," he said, poking a little more gently. "Why didn't you tell me you were going to open that tank? I could have helped."

"I thought that letting him out with only one person in the room might be a little less threatening than if a squad of armed people was standing around. I know how scary it can be to wake up in a strange place and not know where you are or what is coming at you," she admitted, pulling her shirt back up from off her shoulder where he'd left it and hugging herself.

He looked both skeptical and sympathetic at the same time. "So I'm assuming you didn't have the heart to space him after he attacked you, given your own experiences. What happened?"

"We had a pretty tense talk where he held me up against the wall and I secretly held a gun to his chest, and now he's making a place for himself in the cargo hold," she shrugged.

"You'll just take anyone in, won't you, Shepard?" he grinned.

"I took you in, didn't I?" she smiled back and backhanded his chest.

"Hey, I'm useful," he said. "And charming."

"If you say so," she said trying to hide the flush that came to her cheeks. God, what was wrong with her? "We're starting to become a regular orphanage for the unwanted of the galaxy, aren't we?"

He snorted. "Like we were ever anything else."

They both chuckled and fell into a comfortable silence. Finally she said, "I should go. I have fish to feed."

"Don't forget to feed yourself, too. And get that shoulder looked at," he called after her as she walked away.

"Sure thing, mom," she replied as the door closed behind her.

 


	15. Horizon Heartbreak

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With her potentials all collected, Shepard wonders what the Illusive Man has for her next.

The Normandy was at a standstill. It had been nearly a week since they had picked up Grunt and Shepard had taken Jack to Pragia where Cerberus had raised her as a child, using sick and disgusting methods to hone her biotics at the expense of the other children's lives. They had taken out a salvage gang and found another survivor of the facility who had truly lost his marbles. Shepard had convinced Jack to spare the poor man before she blew the facility. Anything to help her people focus and gain closure.

After Pragia had come the assignment that Zaeed had brought to her attention when she recruited him. She had found out he was not only a merc, but he had apparently founded the Blue Suns 20 years ago. His partner Vido Santiago, who was now threatening the workers of this facility, had betrayed him and shot him in the head. Shepard had been surprised that the man had survived, but he called rage an effective anesthetic, comparing his survival to hers during the Normandy incident. The situation had gotten tense when she had allowed Vido to escape because she insisted they save the workers from the fire Zaeed had caused. She had needed to threaten him in the end before saving his life, but she believed that he now had devoted himself fully to her cause.

Now, she felt without purpose. There were no more dossiers to collect on and no one had brought her anything to look into. One morning she took her coffee mug up to the galaxy map and was about to call for some shore leave on the Citadel when Kelly informed her that the Illusive Man had asked to see her in the comm room.

She went in past Mordin, who waved as she passed, hoping that the Illusive Man at least would have more dossiers for her to go through. She set her coffee down on the small outcropping along the wall before activating the terminal. The entire table in the middle of the room dropped into the floor and she stepped into the space where it had been. The holoprojector activated, pulling the Illusive Man to her and projecting her in front of him. He was smoking again. Surprise, surprise. "Shepard!" he said excitedly. "I think we have them! Horizon, one of our colonies in the Terminus Systems, just went silent. If it isn't under attack, it soon will be. Has Mordin delivered the countermeasure for the seeker swarms?"

"Not yet," she admitted, feeling her own excitement grow. Finally, something to do.

"Let's hope he works well under pressure," he said, taking a drag from his cigarette. "There's something else you should know. One of your former crew, Kaidan Alenko... he's stationed on Horizon."

Her stomach flipped and the room spun. Kaidan. He could be in trouble. "Last I knew, Kaidan was Alliance. Why is he out in the Terminus Systems?"

"Officially, it's an outreach program to improve Alliance relations with the colonies, but they're up to something. And if they sent Lieutenant Alenko, it must be big. Perhaps you should take it up with him."

"The Collectors just happened to pick a colony with one of my former crew? I don't buy it," she said, crossing her arms over her chest to hide her shaking hands.

"It shouldn't be a surprise the Collectors are interested in you. Especially if they're working for the Reapers. They might be going after him to get to you."

"Send the coordinates. We'll head straight there," she said sharply, ready to leave and find Kaidan.

"This is the most warning we've ever had, Shepard. Good luck."

He logged off and as soon as the holoprojector began to come down she said, "Joker, set a course for Horizon. I've got to go see the professor."

"Aye, aye, Commander." Joker said and she felt the ship's dampeners kick in as they jumped to FTL.

* * *

 

The shuttle landed on Horizon and Shepard hopped out, not knowing what to expect. It was quiet so far, but swarms of bugs were buzzing around the area. She recognized them as the Seekers, just like the samples they'd collected on Freedom's Progress. A shudder ran through her as she tried to ignore the impulse to duck away from the flying monstrosities. Garrus was at her back and Kasumi had disappeared but she figured she was somewhere close by. Shepard looked up at the massive ship parked just outside the colony. It made the Normandy look like a toy. "We're ground-side. Mordin, you sure those armor upgrades will protect us from the seeker swarms?"

Mordin's voice came over the comm as she started toward the colony. "Certainty impossible, but in limited numbers, should confuse detection, make us invisible to swarms. In theory."

"In theory?" Garrus commented dryly. "That sounds promising."

"Experimental technology. Only test is contact with seeker swarms. Look forward to seeing if you survive!" Mordin said excitedly as Kasumi giggled nearby.

They moved into the colony and were almost immediately set upon by Collectors. The creatures were creepy in person. Humanoid bugs was the description that came to Shepard's mind. She shuddered and thanked whoever was listening that they didn't have tentacles like the Rachni. Figuring out how to kill them was easy enough. They were armored with an exoskeleton, but they had quite a few fleshy points to take advantage of. Kasumi did her thing, staying out of the way, just as she had on Bekenstein, flitting in and out of the fray. A little further along, the Illusive Man's suspicions were confirmed when they were attacked by a swarm of husks. They were a common denominator between the Collectors and the Geth and it proved that the Reapers were involved. Shepard found that her shockwave ability came in particularly handy against the husks as they tried to flank her. They were thrown back and most of them even exploded with the force of her biotics. Every chance she got, she aimed it at them, devastating their ranks.

Shepard knelt beside one of the Collector bodies to investigate their anatomy and check for weaknesses. When she rolled it over, it dropped it's weapon. The gun was like nothing she had ever seen before. She hefted it and aimed it at another body. When she pulled the trigger she was nearly knocked on her ass from the recoil. It shot out a continuous, dense, yellow particle beam that destroyed the body she had aimed at. "Holy shit!" she said. "I am _so_ keeping this."

"Does this mean I get your grenade launcher?" Garrus asked.

"In your dreams, Vakarian," she said, storing the heavy weapon on the place she usually kept said grenade launcher.

With a disappointed grumble, he followed her further into the compound. They soon came upon some of the colonists that had yet to be taken. They were trapped, fully aware in some sort of stasis. Shepard waved her palm in front of one of them and his eyes followed her hand. There was nothing she tried that worked to get them loose. They were forced to leave them behind and continue forward to try and save at least someone. The next group of Collectors that attacked them had a surprise for them. When one of them died, it's body rose into the air and a voice boomed across the field of battle "ASSUMING DIRECT CONTROL!"

Light exploded outward from the corpse and it's exoskeleton cracked to reveal more light from inside. Even its four eyes glowed. A strong barrier formed around it and it had a brand new attack that burned through her shields extremely quickly. As they fought the possessed Collector, it continued to taunt them in that booming voice. "I AM THE HARBINGER OF YOUR PERFECTION." Shepard rolled her eyes and concentrated her fire, trying to bring it's barrier down. It's taunting reminded her of Sovereign and how he had spoken to her on Virmire. "THIS HURTS YOU."

She reached up out of cover and hit it with a warp field that sucked up the remainder of it's barrier and made a dent in its thick armor. "I WILL DESTROY YOU IF I MUST, SHEPARD!"

"Aww, it knows my name," she said in a mocking tone. "Sovereign must have told it all about me."

"I think I preferred anonymity, Shepard," Garrus said as he took the head shot that finished off the Harbinger for good.

"You can't save the galaxy without pissing someone off," she reasoned, toeing the corpse as she approached it. "Do you think Harbinger is a Reaper that can possess it's subjects?"

"That's highly likely," Garrus agreed.

"Come on, let's see if there's anyone that didn't get caught in the swarms."

They came upon one survivor that was hiding in a large garage. He told them about a defense tower that Shepard and Garrus both agreed they could get to work. "We could turn it on the Collector ship," Kasumi finished their thoughts. With that plan, they left the man to stay hidden.

The fight to the defense tower was more like wading in calf deep water. Except the water was husks that swarmed from everywhere. Shockwave after shockwave was tiring Shepard out. Her brain felt like it was on fire by the time they reached the tower. They were able to get a comm link to the Normandy and EDI set to work calibrating the weapon while they defended it. A pile of husks and a few possessed corpses later, Shepard leaned against a pile of tractor tires to catch her breath. As EDI began firing on the Collector vessel with the defense tower, a giant metal abomination flew from the ship and landed with a shockwave that took down their shields. It was like a crab shell full of husk parts. She threw herself behind the tires to get away from the beam it was firing and decided to let loose her own particle beam. She grabbed the weapon from her back that she had taken from the Collector and peered out from her cover. The thing was distracted, trying to fire at Kasumi who was moving it around the field to give Shepard a shot. "My shots are doing nothing," Garrus shouted.

"Don't worry, I got this," She said as her shields charged and reformed around her. She stepped out of cover, holding the weapon with two hands and bracing for the recoil. The weapon was extremely effective. The thing was down in no time as the three of them worked together, distracting and attacking.

It disintegrated after shuddering in place when the beam found its way inside the shell to the husk parts. As Shepard hefted the gun back onto her back, the man they'd left came running up to them as the Collector ship began to launch to escape the barrage of fire it was taking from EDI. "They're pulling out!" Garrus pointed as the ship's engines roared to life. "There's no reason to stay. Most of the colonists are on board. They got what they came for."

"No! Don't let them get away," the colonist shouted.

"There's nothing we can do, they're gone," Shepard said trying to console the man.

"Half the colony's in there! They took Egan and Sam and... and Lilith. Do something!" he shouted.

"I didn't want it to end this way. I did what I could," she said softly. She knew nothing she could say would help.

"More than most, Shepard," Garrus said, coming up behind her.

"Shepard? Wait I know that name," the man said suspiciously. "Sure, I remember you. You're some type of big Alliance hero."

"Commander Shepard," a voice so familiar she thought she might be hearing things spoke her name. She had wondered where he was as she had fought through the colony. She had prayed he hadn't been taken. He stepped into sight and her knees felt weak. He continued to speak and she fell into his voice. "Captain of the Normandy. The first Human SPECTRE. Savior of the Citadel. You're in the presence of a legend, Delan. And a ghost." His brown eyes fell on her and she didn't know what to do.

She was spared having to speak for a few more moments when the man he had called Delan said, "All the good people we lost, and you get left behind. Figures. Screw this. I'm done with you Alliance types." He strode off, waving his hand dismissively.

Kaidan approached her and studied her face for a moment before a small smile crept onto his expression. He pulled her into his arms and she buried her face in his neck, swallowing hot tears as he breathed out his next sentence. "I thought you were dead, Shepard. We all did." She was loathe to release him and the hug lingered nearly a minute before he pulled away.

"It's been too long, Kaidan. How have you been?" the words sounded lame, even as they fell from her mouth, but she had lost all capacity for thought.

"That's all you have to say?" he asked, his nose wrinkling. "You show up after two years and just act like nothing happened? I thought we had something, Shepard." There was an accusatory tone in his voice and she felt her heart breaking just a little as he scolded her. "Something real. I... I loved you." He paused, rubbing his temple. "Thinking you were dead, tore me apart. How could you put me through that? Why didn't you try to contact me? Why didn't you let me know you were alive?" He slowly backed away as he talked and she felt herself losing him.

Her words were rushed as she tried to explain through her biotic headache and the pain in her chest. "I'm sorry, Kaidan. I was clinically dead. It took two years to bring me back." She paused and sighed, as her worst fears were realized. "So much time has passed. You've moved on. I don't want to reopen old wounds." She hugged herself, feeling cold and she couldn't look him in the eye.

"I _did_ move on. At least, I thought I did, but now we've got reports about you and Cerberus," he admitted.

Before she could answer, she heard the growl from Garrus' subvocals as he spoke. "Reports? You mean you already knew?"

Kaidan sighed. "Alliance intel thought Cerberus might be behind the missing human colonies. They got a tip this colony might be the next one to get hit. Anderson stonewalled me, but there were rumors that you weren't dead. That you were working for the enemy."

Shepard felt the need to defend her decision to work with Cerberus. "Our colonies are disappearing. The Alliance turned its back on them. Cerberus is the only group willing to do something about it."

"You can't really believe that! We both know what Cerberus is like. What they're capable of," he said, stepping closer to her again, but this time his stance was intimidating. "I wanted to believe the rumors that you were alive, but I _never_ expected anything like this! You turned your back on everything we believed in. You betrayed the Alliance. You betrayed me." His last sentence was filled with sorrow and she bit her lip at the accusation. She remembered the horrible Nightmare she'd had the night after she'd returned to the Normandy. ' _You're not you anymore._ '

"Kaidan, you know me," she felt her voice trembling. "You know I'd only do this for the right reason. You saw it yourself. The Collectors are targeting human colonies and they're working with the Reapers!"

He moved to reach for her hand, but changed his mind. "I want to believe you, Shepard, but I don't trust Cerberus. They could be using the threat of the Reapers to manipulate you. What if they're behind this? What if they're working with the Collectors?"

Did he think she was stupid? She opened her mouth to argue, but Garrus spoke first. "Dammit, Kaidan! You're so focused on Cerberus that you're ignoring the real threat!"

She agreed with Garrus. "You're letting how you feel about their history get in the way of the facts."

"Maybe," he said, eyeing Garrus and then her. "Or maybe _you_ feel like you owe Cerberus because they saved you. Maybe you're the one who's not thinking straight. You've changed, but I still know where my loyalties lie. I'm an Alliance soldier. Always will be." he sighed and lowered his gaze. "I've got to report back to the Citadel. They can decide if they believe your story or not." He turned and started to walk away. ' _You're not you anymore_.'

"I could use someone like you on my crew, Kaidan," she knew she sounded desperate, but she didn't care. "It'll be just like old times."

"No it won't," he said glancing over his shoulder. "I'll never work for Cerberus. Goodbye, Shepard, and be careful." Then he walked out of her life.

It took everything she had to swallow her emotions and try not to let it get to her. "Joker," she said, activating her comm. Her voice cracked slightly and she swallowed again. "Send the shuttle to pick us up. I've had enough of this colony."

* * *

 

She met with the Illusive Man to report on the events of Horizon, but she really couldn't get her mind on the conversation. All she could think about was her broken heart. She dragged herself up to her cabin and stripped her armor in favor of her usual comfortable hoodie, which she almost discarded because it reminded her of Kaidan. Instead of petty she opted to wallow. She picked up the photo of him on her desk and curled up in the corner of her couch, tucking her legs up inside the hoodie and placing the photo on the table in front of her before turtleing the rest of herself inside the hoodie too. She had her face buried in her knees and her arms wrapped around her shins as she cried silently. That was how Garrus found her. She heard her door open and didn't bother to look up to see who it was. Her chest physically hurt whenever she heard the conversation repeating itself in her head. "Oh, Shepard," Garrus whispered, his voice and subharmonics both laced with sympathy. She was glad the sound wasn't pity, because she couldn't have handled that.

The couch depressed beside her as he sat down and his arm wrapped around her. He pulled her close and started to hum that soothing noise that she loved so much. It always made her feel better. He stroked her hair and rocked her. She found herself migrating into his lap and his other arm supported her as she buried her tear streaked face in his chest. She felt safe as he, without words, allowed her to work through the pain on her own. "Why would I think he would want me back?" she finally managed to whisper. Her words were muffled by her hoodie and the proximity to his chest, but he still heard her.

"Because who wouldn't?" he said. "Kaidan had no right to say those things. He doesn't see the facts, and he didn't give you the benefit of the doubt. I'm really not sure how he can claim to love you when his reaction to finding out you're alive is to accuse you and speak to you like a child."

As his anger rose, his soothing hum began to slip into a growl. She lifted her head and looked at his face. She wasn't certain where his thoughts were, but the intensity of his stare made her feel better. She laid her head back down against his chest and slipped her right arm back into her sleeve so she could lay her palm flat over his heart beside her face. "Thank you," she said, her voice still low and raspy. He didn't answer, just lent his presence. The exhaustion of emotional stress soon claimed her and she fell asleep curled up in his lap.

* * *

 

Shepard woke, her back complaining. She was still curled in Garrus' lap. Her face was buried in his neck and his cheek rested on the top of her head. She groaned as she tried to put her feet down on the floor. "Shepard?" he asked, his voice groggy as her movement woke him.

"Ow," she whimpered.

"It's not a cramp, is it?" he asked, tentative humor in his voice.

"Don't worry. I think my spine is just a little out of place from sleeping the way I did," she touched her feet to the floor and he moved his arms from around her waist so she could stand. She stretched her arms above her head and twisted at the waist. An audible pop sent a shiver down her spine as her body realigned itself. "Much better," she sighed dropping her arms.

"How are you feeling?" Garrus asked, that concern back in his voice.

She tried to play it off, afraid that if she over shared, she might start to cry again. She reached and bent over the table to lay the picture of Kaidan on its face. She couldn't look at it anymore. "I slept really well," she said.

"That's not what I meant, Shepard," he scolded as she cocooned her emotions, hiding them away.

"I know, Big Guy," she said passing by his legs and patting his shoulder as she walked to her desk. "I think I just need time. And something to do." She sat down at her desk and pulled up her messages. There, staring her right in the face was a message from Kaidan. She swiped over it, ignoring it until after Garrus left. Somehow, she felt strange letting him see her cry over another man. It felt like betrayal. Even though they had never had that kind of relationship, the way she had been feeling lately towards him was confusing her. "Oh, look, more dossiers and... news about Tali. Perfect thing to take my mind off of... Horizon." She couldn't bear to say his name.

"Are you sure you're going to be alright?" Garrus asked, joining her by leaning on the partition between her desk and the rest of the room.

She tucked her hair behind her ears and nodded a little too emphatically. "I'll be fine. Distraction is key."

"And breakfast," he reminded her, pushing away from the wall. "I'll be in the Main Battery if you need me working on installing that Thanix Cannon."

"Thanks," she called after him as he left, feeling a little badly for hiding from him. She'd never hidden anything from him before. She picked at the polish on her nails, leaning back in her seat. Was she so upset because of Kaidan dumping her, or was it because now that she had nothing to cling to or hold her back, she had to face her feelings about Garrus? She stared at her console, debating on whether she should read Kaidan's message when an new message flagged urgent came through. It was a video call from the Alliance. She tapped the accept and her partition transformed into a giant screen with Admiral Hackett's face staring back at her. She stood quickly and saluted. "Admiral Hackett, Sir. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

The Admiral smiled at her as if he was glad to see her. "It is good to see you, Commander. I received word yesterday confirming that you were alive. I've been appraised of the situation, but I was wondering if you might be able to do me a personal favor."

"Of course, Sir. Anything," she agreed, dropping into a respectable at ease stance.

"Your ship is about an hours flight from the Bahak system. A friend of mine was out there studying possible Reaper technology in Batarian space. She and her team discovered what she called evidence of an imminent Reaper invasion. I later found out that she has been captured by the Batarians on Aratoht and is accused of terrorism."

"Reaper invasion, Sir?" Shepard confirmed that she had heard right.

"I thought that might pique your interest. I cannot recover any of Dr. Kenson's data unless she is found and rescued. This is a highly sensitive matter and I can't have Cerberus involved so I will need you to go in alone." The Admiral certainly did not walk on egg shells.

"I'll make this a priority," Shepard agreed.

"It really is good to see you, Commander," The admiral said, dropping another smile.

"You too, Sir," she said before he cut the connection. Her blood was pumping hot. Batarians. A sore subject, but the Admiral was counting on her. "Joker. I need to get to Aratoht, ASAP!" she called over the comm as she went for her armor.

"Uh, sure thing Commander," Joker's voice held a question, but she felt the ship begin to move.

She set her armor up beside her bathroom door and decided to get a shower quickly before suiting up. "Shepard, shall I inform a ground team of a new mission?"

"No, EDI. I need to keep this quiet. It is a favor for Admiral Hackett and he asked that I go in alone," she said undressing.

"Very well, Commander." EDI complied and there were no more interruptions.

 


	16. What is it with Batarians and Asteroids?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard's solo mission falls apart in a spectacular fashion.

Shepard moved silently through the complex on Aratoht where she had landed the shuttle. Hackett's intel had revealed that Dr. Kenson was being held in the prison somewhere down below. She followed a map on her omnitool that directed her through the area. It was dark and she found it easy to sneak past all of the guards stationed around the entrances and get into the basement through the sewers. She _had_ been trained as an engineer and infiltrator after all. She took a moment to scowl as she realized that her new biotics had made her lazy. She found the lock on the hatch up into the facility taking more time than it should have. Her comm was blissfully silent since she'd turned it off after sneaking off the Normandy. She'd promised Hackett that she would keep this between them and she didn't intend to have anyone nosing in where they weren't needed. Rescuing friendlies from behind enemy lines was what she had done best back during her training. And she did it best alone. Hackett's timing couldn't have been more perfect. This mission was what she needed to clear her head.

Once the interface flicked to green, she shut her omnitool down and pushed the heavy metal door upwards, thanking her muscle weave that had come in the package with her upgrades. She peered out, making sure she was alone before flipping the door 90 degrees to lodge it open and hoisting herself up. After a few more minutes of sneaking past guards, she came across a security office. She thanked whoever was listening that nobody was manning the cameras and she hacked the system. She quickly erased all trace of herself and scanned each room for a woman matching Dr. Kenson's description. She spotted her a few rooms down attached to some sort of electrocution torture device while a single Batarian asked her questions. Interrogation at its worst. There was no sound on the footage and that somehow made the sight of the torture worse. Shepard balled her fists as she watched Amanda Kenson scream in silence as the Batarian shouted in her face. She couldn't watch anymore. She punched the desk in rage and drew her pistol. She was tired of sneaking.

Shepard made her way quickly to the neighboring room and crashed through the door. She hadn't even realized that the pistol she had intended to use had been dropped until she had the Batarian's head firmly between her hands. She twisted, her rage summoning her biotics. The Batarian dropped, with a sickening snap as his neck was broken. Shepard stared down at the body as the blue hue surrounding her skin faded. She came back to herself, remembering she was there for the Doctor. "I'm sorry," she said, swallowing. "Dr. Kenson?"

The woman nodded. "Get his gun and get me out of here."

"I'm Commander Shepard. Admiral Hackett sent me," she explained as she undid the harness that held the woman in the torture device.

As Dr. Kenson climbed out of her shackles, Shepard made sure she was alright and then moved to retrieve her own dropped pistol. A thumping noise drew her attention back to the doc who, after taking the gun from the dead Batarian, had stomped on his face. Shepard felt a sick type of elation at the sight. The doctor turned out to be a very capable woman in spite of outward appearances. She and Shepard plowed their way through the prison in search of a console to clear their way to freedom. Shepard felt her mood lightening with each Batarian death. She felt terrible for feeling so good about the situation. Shaking off her reservations, she covered Kenson as she disabled the orbital tracking grid so they could fly out in a shuttle without being followed. Getting the shuttle out of the hangar was another story. The garage was locked and Shepard couldn't hack the locks. They wound up blowing the mechanisms to bits by firing into crates full of explosives that were stacked conveniently nearby.

When they finally had escaped the prison, Shepard set their shuttle on autopilot, heading toward the coordinates Kenson had given her. "We should be well out of range before they get their security measures unscrambled," Kenson said, sitting down in the back of the shuttle as Shepard joined her.

"Do you think they'll come after you?" she asked, curious as to what all of this had to do with the Reapers.

"I'm not taking any chances. Batarians don't take kindly to humans who plan to destroy their mass relays," Kensen said, shocking Shepard.

"So the charges against you are... true?" she stammered. Had she aided in killing innocent Batarians because of her battle rage in her current state of mind? Her chest clenched in fear. Hackett wouldn't send her to kill innocents. Something more was going on.

"Well to be fair, that's about _half_ the story," Kenson clarified. "My people and I were here investigating rumors of Reaper technology out in the fringes of this system."

"I guess you found something," Shepard concluded with a sigh, gathering her wits.

Kenson nodded. "We found proof that the Reapers will be arriving in this system. When they get here, they'll use its mass relay to travel throughout the galaxy. We call it the 'Alpha Relay'. From here, the Reapers can invade anywhere in the galaxy."

The pieces were falling into place. "So you decided to destroy it."

Kenson turned away as if the decision was shameful. "Exactly. Doing that would stop the Reapers' invasion. Even at FTL speeds, it'd be months or years before they got to the next relay. We came up with what we just called 'the project': a plan to launch a nearby asteroid into the relay and destroy it before the Reapers could arrive." Shepard glanced out the window of the shuttle as they passed by the relay in question. Batarians and asteroids were becoming a mix that she was starting to despise. "Of course, the resulting explosion would probably wipe out the system."

"Why do you think destroying the mass relay would destroy the entire system?" Shepard asked, unsure if she was willing to risk all of those lives. Evacuation would be a very drawn out process.

"Mass relays are the most powerful mass-effect engines in the known galaxy. The energy released from a relay's destruction would probably resemble a supernova," Kenson reasoned. Shepard could see the concern. She had seen what her own biotics could do when unleashed in a display of brute force. How much more brutish could you get than throwing an asteroid into a relay? "This is a remote system, but just over 300,000 Batarians live on the colony where they held us. The explosion would undoubtedly kill them all."

Shepard flinched. That many lives, even Batarian lives, was too much for her to gamble with. It was a colony. That meant not just soldiers, but children, families, innocents lived there. She sat forward. "I still don't see how you learned about this supposed invasion."

Kenson looked insulted. "The evidence came from what we call Object Rho, a Reaper artifact we discovered among the asteroids near the relay itself. When we get back to Arcturus Station, I'll explain everything and provide copies of all our notes on the artifact." She crossed her arms and legs indignantly.

"How exactly does a Reaper artifact give you proof of an impending invasion?"

"It showed me visions of the Reapers' arrival. Much like your Prothean Beacon, I imagine," the woman narrowed her eyes, almost challenging Shepard to say she was lying. "The Reapers are coming, Commander. That much I know for certain."

"If you're working near a Reaper artifact, how have you avoided indoctrination?" Shepard was starting to get a bad feeling.

"We've been very careful. We know what we're dealing with. You're not speaking to a child, Shepard. I saw what Sovereign did at the Citadel. Trust me, I know what's at stake." Kenson snapped angrily.

"The stakes are too high. If you were willing to destroy a whole system over this, I want to see your proof." Shepard crossed her own arms.

"I guess I can't argue with that. Give me a moment." Kenson stood and crossed the shuttle, picking up a comm unit and punching in the codes to a signal. "Kenson to Project Base."

A gravely voice sounded over the comm. "Good to hear your voice, doctor. You coming home?"

"Affirmative, and I've got Commander Shepard with me."

"Shepard? Really?" the voice seemed shocked.

"Tidy up the lab. The Commander needs to confirm the artifact."

"Right. I'll get everything set up for your arrival. Project base out."

Shepard narrowed her eyes behind the doctor's back, not liking the sound of what she was walking alone into. No one knew where she was. She had escaped the Normandy alone in an attempt to sort out her feelings and now she was leaving her shuttle, and anyone's knowledge of where she was, behind for an unknown location. _Stupid, Shepard. Reckless._ Her thoughts were coming through in Garrus' flanged voice. She wished he were there to tell her in person that this was a terrible idea. "All set," Kenson said, returning to her seat. "Just sit back and relax. We'll be there in no time."

True to her word, minutes later, the shuttle was approaching an asteroid almost as large as X57 had been. They landed at a small facility built on the surface, the rickety stolen shuttle sounding pleased to be back on solid ground. They stepped out of the hatch and Shepard glanced around at the quiet entry. Above the door to the prefab, there was a countdown clock ticking away. 2 days, 3 hours, 25 minutes, 28 seconds. Shepard frowned as Dr. Kenson said, "Here we are. Welcome to Project Base."

"What's this?" Shepard asked, gesturing to the countdown.

"That's our countdown to Arrival. When that gets to zero, the Reapers will have come." How very dramatic Shepard thought as the doctor continued. "Just over two days and counting. Puts things in perspective, doesn't it?"

"How do you know that's an accurate countdown?" She couldn't figure how they could have calculated such a precise measurement. _13 seconds_.

"It is," was Kenson's passionate answer. "The artifact has been giving off pulses at definite intervals since we found it. The intervals have been decreasing at a steady rate. The artifact is reacting to the Reapers' proximity. In just over forty-eight hours, the pulses will become constant and the Reapers will be here."

Shepard's blood ran cold. Her worst fears were staring her in the face. She had been brought back to stop this very thing and now she might not have time. The ridiculous fight against the Collectors may be pointless. Cerberus may be pointless. "You're saying the Reapers could be at Earth in two days? There's no time to waste."

"Then let's show you that proof," Kenson smiled. "That door exits the hanger. The artifact is in our central lab area."

Kenson allowed her to lead for the most part, giving directions from behind. Shepard felt strangely like she was being herded. The few people that were in the hallways as they walked stopped what they were doing to stare at her as she passed. "So what would it take to get the Project back up and running?" She asked as she passed through an observation room.

"Everything was in place when we were arrested. It wasn't a question of 'could we', but 'should we'."

Shepard saw the need for the question, but if they had had so much time they could have tried to convince the Batarians to evacuate. Now with 2 days left, it was going to be a challenge. "What alternative do we have?" She couldn't let this opportunity pass. If she could stop the Reapers here and now, it might buy her time to deal with the Collectors and figure out how to fight them when they finally did arrive.

"The Reapers will reach this system, regardless, but the Alpha Relay is their shortcut to the rest of the Galaxy. If you want to keep the Reapers at bay, this relay must be destroyed."

Kenson led Shepard to an elevator where they took a short ride down. As they walked toward a locked door, the doctor unlocked the interface as Shepard felt herself resolve to do what needed to be done. She stood a bit straighter and said, "We have to get the Project running again. It's probably the only chance we have."

The door whooshed open and they stepped inside a large open room. "Commander Shepard, I give you Object Rho." Kenson spread her arms in a wide gesture at the giant metallic artifact in front of them. There was no doubt that it was Reaper technology.

Large metal tentacles reached for the ceiling in a pattern that made the entire thing look almost like a flower. Nodes of light glowed at the tips of the insides of each arm, following down the arms in straight veins of light to pool in the middle like some sort of pulsing heartbeat. The first thing Shepard noticed made her bad feeling worse. "You have the Reaper artifact just sitting here... out in the open?!"

"When we found it, it showed me a vision of the Reapers' arrival." the doctor said, approaching the 'bud' and staring up at it with reverence.

"Kenson, this is not good," Shepard found herself backing away. She remembered Saren at the end, unable to think for himself, a pawn in Sovereign's game. She would not let this thing into her mind.

"Give it a moment, Shepard. It'll give you the proof you need." Shepard had stopped her retreat and felt herself drawn to the artifact. When she actually let her eyes rest on it, her body spasmed. She felt it tugging on her, wrapping its tentacles in her brain. Images like the Prothean Beacon flashed past her eyes. The Alpha Relay, the Reapers, and a feeling of accomplishment. It was intoxicating. She swallowed, finding herself on the floor on her hands and knees as she fought the compulsion. She glanced up at the doctor to try and talk sense into her, but there was a pistol in her face. "I can't let you start the Project, Shepard. I can't let you stop the Arrival."

As Shepard slowly climbed to her feet, every fiber of her being aching for one moment more with the enlightening feeling, she heard several boots approaching at a run. She wouldn't let them kill her. She couldn't die on this rock and let the Reapers come without doing something. She couldn't let Garrus down again. _Not without telling him,_ her Subconscious said to her. She huddled on one knee, taking control of her faculties back from the pull of the artifact. A small jolt from her biotics helped her feel like she washed the compulsion away for a moment. She stood with her renewed energy and knocked the gun from Kenson's unsuspecting hands. As the doctor tried to recover from being punched in the face, Shepard threw herself into a meager cover.

"Take her down!" Kenson shouted as bullets began to fly at Shepard while the woman escaped.

"Dammit!" Shepard cursed as she was swarmed from all sides. She was finding it difficult to find a camp spot to take on her enemies. Her biotics felt weakened as she attempted to throw some of her enemies off her so she could gain a foothold. A voice in her head that she recognized as Sovereign spouted about the inevitable as she fought off droves of Project crazies. The glow from the artifact seemed to be brightening as if it were powering up. She shook her head, trying to ignore the voice.

"DO NOT RESIST. GIVE YOURSELF OVER AND BE SPARED."

"Fat chance," Shepard grumbled to herself as she breathed, attempting to focus on the threat of the enemies around her.

"Shepard won't go down!" One of the soldiers shouted as they clipped her shields for what felt like hundredth time. She kept them charged as best she could, staying down in her tiny corner and only shooting if she felt she could take a kill shot. There were too many of them and only one of her.

"Where's Garrus when you need him?" She said sarcastically to herself, trying to use her own voice to block out the constant taunting from the artifact. "Oh, right! You left him behind without a word because you might have feelings you don't understand. Stupid!" She leaned out and blasted a shotgun round into a soldier that was getting uncomfortably close with a flame thrower.

"YOUR GALAXY IS IN SIGHT. YOUR FINAL DAYS ARE AT HAND."

"Yeah, yeah. Sovereign liked to talk too," she said. "And apparently Harbinger does as well." The memory of the voice of the possessed Collector making her shudder.

With a combination of hastily typed tech skills from her omnitool, her weakened biotics and her trusty pistol and shotgun, she managed to take down nearly all of the troops before they called in a heavy mech. She'd never faced off with a YMIR solo. It tracked her all over the room as she ducked in and out of cover, throwing the occasional overload at its shields and wishing she had more tech firepower. After overloading the thing's shields five times, they finally dropped. With a sigh of relief, she pulled her grenade launcher from her back and waited for the YMIR to need a reload on its machine gun. When the incessant pelting fire stopped, she stood to take aim with the grenade launcher. Big Mistake. The rocket flew at her, hitting her square in the chest and decimating her shields. The impact jarred her, knocking her backwards a few feet as she shook her head to try and regain some semblance of balance before aiming with the launcher before it started to fire again. She shot off a grenade and fell back down into cover waiting for it to blow. She took the moment to throw up a biotic barrier to make up for the loss of her shields. The barrier was thin and she knew it would not survive the impact from another rocket, so while the mech recovered from the first grenade, attempting to put up more shields, she stood again and fired off another grenade. The mech looked like it was in bad shape and she prayed that the second grenade would take care of her problem. She ducked until she heard the grenade explode. When the mech began to short circuit, she looked up over her cover to watch it explode. "YOU SHALL BE THE FIRST TO WITNESS OUR ARRIVAL!" The voice distracted her and she felt herself stand to look at the artifact without control of her own actions. As the mech exploded, shrapnel flew at her and she couldn't duck. A large bit of YMIR lodged itself in her thigh and another smaller piece found its way into her left side, between two of her ribs. Before she could react at all. A huge wave of energy slammed out of the artifact in the middle of the room and she was knocked back into darkness.

* * *

 

Shepard was getting really tired of waking up in strange medical facilities surrounded by enemies. "The sedative isn't working! Security!" A woman shouted as Shepard sat up just a bit too quickly and jarred a sore spot in her side.

She grabbed at the pain, pressing her palm to the wound to see that she was dressed in civilian clothes and her armor was missing. They had patched her up. After trying to kill her, these people had saved her. What the hell was going on here? Two guards were standing at the doorway, blocking her escape. She ignored the pain in her side and leg and jumped down off the bed to rush them. The element of surprise saved her. The guards were so flabbergasted that she was awake, let alone up and punching them in the faces, that taking them down was almost laughable. The woman who had run off shouting was now standing behind a glass window in a neighboring room. She crossed her arms smugly as a barrier shot up between Shepard and the hallway. Shepard cursed, realizing that the guards had fallen on the opposite side of the barrier, their weapons with them. She needed to do something.

A quick scan of her surroundings revealed that this was more than a med bay. It was a lab. She moved to the far wall where she could see out the window a row of inactive LOKI mechs. "Step away from the console!" the woman shouted.

"Oh, I think I'm going to enjoy this," Shepard mused, hacking into the system to take control of one of the mechs. If she couldn't get out from this side, she would have to blow her way out from that side. As she touched the console with both palms, a virtual rendering linked up through her optical cybernetics, giving her a unique view of the world. She could see as the mech was seeing. "Nifty."

She walked the mech into the control room where the smug lady was no longer looking smug and shot her. The woman fell and Shepard moved toward the door. She followed the cables that were maintaining the barrier to a fuse box. Her mech was attacked a few times by other security mechs, but she shot them too. She needed out of this room. The easiest way to get the barrier to come down was to cut the power. She used the last of the mech's bullets to shoot the fuse box until it exploded. The mech was in the line of fire and it self destructed when part of the fuse box hit it in the skull. Shepard shook off some vertigo as she was jerked out of the virtual world and was suddenly looking at her own palms pressed flat to the console. The blue of her fingernails made her wish, again, that Garrus were there. She pulled her palms from the console and rubbed her hands together as she made her way out of the room past where the barrier had been. She spotted a locker nearby the remaining inactive mechs. On a whim, she opened it to see if there was anything useful for her. Relief washed over her as she spotted her armor and weapons tucked neatly inside the small space. She quickly clipped on the damaged armor and activated her shields as her omnitool slipped easily over her wrist. Feeling much more like herself, she turned to leave. Above the exit door she spotted something that made her stop in her tracks. "Dammit!" Big as day was a duplicate countdown clock like the one she had seen outside when they arrived. This one read 0 Days, 1 hour, 56 minutes, 42 seconds. "Not much time," she mused, realizing that she definitely should always have a team at her back. If nothing else, it helped her not talk to herself. "I have to get this asteroid moving and get the hell out of here."

Easier said than done. Shepard soon found out that Kenson knew she was loose. Security continuously swarmed her as she made her way through the base, trying to find out how to activate the propulsion systems on the asteroid. She started to wonder where exactly the good doctor was finding all of these people willing to walk so openly into indoctrination for her. If there was nothing else going for her it was that she had stopped hearing the whispering in her head from the artifact. Hopefully that meant she was not near the thing long enough to have it snake into her mind and stick. By the time she made it to Project control, the timer was dwindling. 1 Hour, 46 minutes, 59 seconds.

"Welcome to Project control," the computer chirped happily.

"I want to activate the Project," Shepard said into the console, hoping there was not going to be some sort of lock for using the wrong voice.

"Warning: Activating the Project will result in an estimated three hundred and five thousand casualties. Do you wish to continue?"

Shepard balked, her hand hovering over the switch. So many innocent lives. Swallowing her heart, she pushed her hand firmly down. Four giant torches sprung to life, shaking the asteroid as it began to move forward. Shepard stumbled and in that moment, hated herself. She was murdering 305,000 innocent colonists. How was she better than the Collectors? "Project activation in progress. Warning: Collision with mass relay is imminent. Begin evacuation procedures."

Shepard stared at the console and saw a communications up-link. She could contact the Normandy and get the hell off this rock. She moved to find the Normandy's channel but then realized that with almost 2 hours left, maybe she could help get some of those colonists to safety. She opened the channel to announce to the entire system, over all frequencies. "Alert! All colonists living in the Bahak System: This is...."

Before she could finish her announcement, the line went to static and Dr. Kenson's face appeared on the console screen. "Shepard, NO! Do you have any idea what you've done? You leave me no choice. If we can't stop this asteroid, it must be destroyed."

Shepard had had enough. "Tell me where to find Dr. Amanda Kenson," she said into the VI console.

"Doctor Kenson is traveling to the reactor core module," the VI helpfully informed her.

"An Eezo core meltdown should do it. Because of you, everyone on this rock will be obliterated!" Kenson shouted.

"Not if I get to you first," Shepard threatened as she turned away from the console and began to follow a map through the station.

She met little resistance along her way. She figured that whoever was left was probably trying to evacuate before either the asteroid collided with the relay or crazy doctor Kenson set off the reactor and blew the rock. Self preservation was winning out. Shepard soon reached Kenson who immediately shouted at her from behind the glass enclosing her inside the drive core. "Don't try to stop me, Shepard. I need to do this!"

"I've already activated the Project. We can still escape this rock!" Time to see if Kenson had any self preservation left.

"There is no escape. There's no redemption for what you've done. I will die never having seen the Reapers' blessings... And you... will just die!" She slammed her hand down on a button and ran off before Shepard could get a bead on her.

"Dammit, Kenson!" Shepard let her run off as a few guards, that had apparently not had enough of their own self preservation to get out, came through a door and began to shoot at her. She fought her way past them and then found an elevator that led her to another VI console. "How do I stabilize the reactor core?" she asked the VI.

"All automatic safety protocols have been overridden. To stabilize the reactor core: manually insert Cooling Rod A from this control station. Manually insert Cooling Rod B from Control Station B. Doing so will stabilize the reactor core." Shepard set to work, grabbing the handle on top of the massive cooling rod. She pushed down and turned the handle to lock the rod in place. "Cooling Rod A reinserted. Reactor cooling process has begun."

Shepard applauded her small victory and followed her map down another elevator and toward the core. To get to Control Station B, the map was leading her through a large room that was currently undergoing plasma venting. She quickly found the controls to disable it temporarily so she could cross. In the state of things, she was amazed that it turned off at all. She made it by the skin of her teeth, the door slamming shut behind her as the plasma venting restarted automatically. From there, past a few guards in the maintenance area, she found herself locked out of the reactor core. She overrode the lock with her omnitool after taking out a guard who thought he could keep her trapped in there on his own. Shepard finally made her way up to her destination and depressed the second rod. "Cooling Rod B reinserted. Reactor meltdown averted. Core temperature dropping."

"You've done nothing, Shepard!" Kenson shouted over comms. "I can still override power to the engines. Try to stop me!"

Shepard took the challenge as a personal insult "I'll do more than try," she growled, reloading her pistol. She found the elevator leading down so she could get in to the reactor and take care of the problem that was Dr. Kenson. "Step away from the reactor!" She shouted as she came up on the woman from behind.

"You've ruined everything! I can't hear the whispers anymore!" Kenson banged her fists on the console in front of her.

"Turn around. Now!" Shepard shouted, hoping she wasn't pounding on something important.

"You've taken them away from me. I will never see the Reapers' arrival," the woman almost sobbed. She slowly turned to face Shepard and there was a detonator in her fist. "All you had to do was stay asleep. None of this had to happen."

Shepard took the shot. She couldn't risk Kenson blowing the place and stopping the asteroid. When the woman fell, Shepard realized her mistake. The detonator was active and when Kenson's hand fell limp, the detonator fell out, initializing the blast. Just beside Kenson's body, a jury rigged explosive blew. The wave of pressure and fire threw Shepard backwards off her feet. She slammed into a wall behind her, feeling the wound in her side reopen just before her head smacked into the wall as well and everything went dark.

* * *

 

There were alarms going off. Why were there alarms? Shepard opened her eyes and the room was sideways. She glanced around, disorientated. Where was she again? A sharp pain in the back of her head made her reach for the sore spot. A computerized voice was calmly issuing a warning over the sound of the alarms. Shepard groaned as she tried to stand and her thigh complained of ripped skin. The room was still spinning and she felt bile rise in her throat. Swallowing the nausea, she forced her legs to stand. If there were alarms, there was trouble. She looked around, listening to the computerized voice. "Warning: Collision imminent."

She saw the console and Kenson's burned body and remembered. Running over to the console, she attempted to contact the Normandy. "Joker, this is Shepard. I need a pick up. Now!" Her voice even sounded desperate to her.

"Communictions system damaged," the VI helpfully explained.

Shepard could have cried. "Dammit!" She slammed her own fists down on the console just as Kenson had. She pushed away and began pacing, running her fingers through her hair and coming back with blood on her gloves from the crack she'd taken when the bomb went off.

"Evacuation protocols in effect. All personnel report to escape shuttles," The VI chirped.

"Where can I find an escape shuttle?" She asked the computer desperately. She had just wanted a simple mission to clear her head and now she might never come back. She couldn't do that to Garrus again. He'd almost gotten himself killed the last time she'd died. She wouldn't let that happen. Not to him.

"Take the lift from this room to the external access. From there, proceed to the communications tower. The remaining escape shuttles will be located on the tower's landing pad."

"I have to get to that comm tower and take a shuttle. It's my only chance," she said to herself, turning to head for the elevator. She tried to ignore the blinking timer above her head 28 minutes, 40 seconds. She was completely unimpeded on her way to the tower. Before passing out into the open she crammed her head, which felt way too large, into her helmet. As she passed out of the door, she watched the last shuttle parked across the way take off and leave the facility. That was it. Her last hope. She could have fallen to her knees in defeat if it weren't for the thought of Garrus waiting back on the Normandy for her, probably worried sick. She'd been gone nearly three days with no word, her shuttle abandoned. She raced across the field, her head pounding and her leg protesting each time she landed weight on it. She could feel the blood dripping down her side from the shrapnel wound at her ribs too. If she made it out alive, Chakwas was going to kill her. The Alpha Relay was looming in the sky just ahead. She had never seen a relay this close before without the protection of whatever ship she was traveling in. It would have been a beautiful sight if she wasn't running for her life. She spotted the console that connected to the comm tower. Maybe she could contact the Normandy from there. She breathed through her helmet when the VI told her that the external comm channel had opened. "Shepard to Normandy. Joker, do you read me?"

Silence. She backed away from the comm and panicked. To her left, a holo-image appeared. It looked like a Collector image, but one she had not seen in person. Suddenly it spoke. "Shepard. You have become an annoyance. You fight against inevitability. Dust struggling against cosmic winds. This seems a victory to you. A star system sacrificed, but even now, your greatest civilizations are doomed to fall. Your leaders will beg to be harvested."

"Maybe you're right. Maybe we can't win this, but we'll fight you regardless. Just like we did Sovereign, Just like I'm doing now. However 'insignificant' we might be, we will fight, we will sacrifice, and we will find a way. That's what humans do."

She seemed to have hit a sore spot. "Know this as you die in vain. Your time will come. Your species will fall. Prepare yourselves for the Arrival."

The giant bug like Collector image faded away and she desperately ran back to the landing pad where the comm terminal was. Desperate for an answer, she thought she was hearing things when she heard the generic voice of the comm relay say. "Commander Shepard. Normandy inbound for pickup."

"Roger that," she sighed in relief as she saw the nose of the Normandy come flying around the tower and head for the landing pad where she waited. The airlock was open as Joker pulled up alongside the edge. There was no time for a landing. She ran as fast as she could and threw herself into the airlock. The door closed behind her and Joker gunned it for the relay. The ship's engine and the mass effect field of the relay sparked and the Normandy shot from the Bahak System just before the asteroid smashed into the relay and destroyed it. Shepard could hardly catch her breath as the decontamination finished its cycle. She was fighting to get her helmet off when the door into the ship came open and Garrus stepped in to kneel beside her. "All those people," she breathed, sobbing as she dropped her helmet. "Oh God, what did I do?"

"Shepard?" Garrus said softly and she had never been happier to hear anyone's voice.

* * *

 

Garrus had been ready to give Shepard a proper talking to. Three days she'd been gone with no word. He'd spent most of that time hovering behind Joker in the cockpit and trying to get information from EDI. He knew the damned AI had an idea where Shepard was and what she was doing, but the machine wasn't talking. Shepard was alone in Batarian space. Any number of things could have happened. She could have been kidnapped, trapped behind enemy lines, dead. The last thought was the one that terrified him more than the others. He had just gotten her back. When Joker had gotten word moments ago from a random comm relay miles away that said Commander Shepard was requesting emergency evac he hadn't known how to feel. He was overjoyed that she was alive, but what had she been doing? Why was she in need of emergency evacuation from an asteroid? What was it with Batarians and asteroids? Joker had immediately gunned it to the coordinates given by the relay. Joker had then noticed that the asteroid was on a collision course with the nearby mass relay. "We'll be stuck here if we don't hit that relay before the asteroid destroys it."

Garrus looked out the forward windows and saw a small black figure darting towards them on the landing pad. He'd recognize Shepard anywhere. "There," he'd pointed her out and Joker had pulled the ship up and opened the airlock for her.

Seconds after she had boarded, Joker had slammed closed the airlock and shouted for EDI to get them out of there. Garrus had turned and immediately charged for the airlock. When the door opened, he took in the scene before him. Shepard was on her knees, gasping as she tugged at her helmet. When it finally came loose, she gasped in a breath of air and dropped the thing on the floor. Her entire body seemed to deflate as she whispered, "All those people." A sob wracked her. "Oh God, what did I do?"

"Shepard?" he asked, kneeling beside her. She was a wreck. Her armor had taken some damage and she was bleeding from somewhere, he could smell it. Her eyes were glazed over and he gently took her hand to help her to her feet. She wavered and fell into him, resting her head on his chest. He hugged her closer to soothe whatever she had started sobbing about. He touched his fingers to her hair like she seemed to like him to do and they came away sticky with blood. "Spirits, Shepard. Your head."

"I killed them all," she whispered, not seeming to care about the giant gash she had in the back of her head. "Alliance. Need to tell Hackett. Kenson was crazy." she shook her head, blinking hard then rephrased. "No. Not crazy. In.. in... doctat... indo...." she stopped, then swallowed and her eyes finally met his. "In...doc...tri...na..ted..." she finished, fear and regret flashing in her eyes.

"EDI," Garrus called out, pulling his eyes from hers for a moment as his heart raced. "Can you send a message to Admiral Hackett of the Alliance?"

"Of course, Mr. Vakarian," EDI complied. "I have also alerted Dr. Chakwas that the Commander is in need of medical care."

"Thanks EDI," he said, gently guiding Shepard with an arm around her shoulder.

She seemed to be finding it harder and harder to string together a sentence as he led her to the elevator to go down to the med bay. She seemed to be blaming herself for something, but she couldn't articulate exactly what. He patiently shushed her, worrying more about her physical health over her emotional state at the moment. The head wound was the worst, but it was not the only injury she had. What the hell had happened on that asteroid?

Shepard wavered on her feet, barely able to stand. He had enough halfway from the elevator to the med bay and scooped her up in his arms to carry her the rest of the way. Her leg was bleeding as well and he wondered how she had been putting any weight on it at all. She seemed to forget about whatever was bothering her as she nuzzled her face closer to him, burying it between his cowl and his neck. "You smell like home,"she whispered, before her head drooped and she lost consciousness. She was definitely delirious.

He passed into the med bay and Chakwas was ready for them. "Put her there, please," she said. Garrus laid Shepard on the table, careful of her head.

"She's got a pretty bad concussion," he said. "I saw a deep wound on her leg, but I can't tell whether there is anything else."

Mordin came through the med bay door. "Heard Shepard was injured. Want to help." Chakwas shooed Garrus out of the way and began to examine Shepard's injuries. "Incision in left side between third and fourth rib... Problematic." Mordin continued, noticing the dripping blood that Garrus hadn't seen.

Chakwas and Mordin worked together to get Shepard patched up and when they started to take more of her clothes than Garrus was comfortable with, he left the room to let them do their jobs. "Shepard is injured?" Miranda asked, from across the mess hall.

Garrus nodded, brushing his hands over his fringe in a very human gesture of stress. "Chakwas and Mordin have it covered," he said with a lot more confidence than he felt. He knew they could handle it, but he also knew that Shepard was in a very vulnerable state. Not just physically, but emotionally. He felt dirty for thinking it, but he knew exactly who he needed to ask for advice.

"Well, what the hell happened? Where was she?" Miranda asked crossing her arms over her ample chest.

"I don't know, Miranda," he said. "She wasn't exactly the most lucid she's ever been." Before Miranda could grill him any more, he walked away, making a bee line for the elevator. Back up in the CIC, he didn't have to go far. "Uh, Ms. Chambers... Could I have a word?"

The small red head turned around with a look of concern on her face. "Please, call me Kelly. I saw you taking the Commander to the med bay. Is she going to be alright?"

He nodded. "I have faith in Dr. Chakwas. She saved my life from a rocket to the face, I think she can handle a concussion. Shepard tends to attract injuries regularly, but I'm getting off track."

"Of course. You had a question," she said extending her hand for him to ask her anything.

He sighed. "I don't know if you're aware, but Horizon was a bit of an emotional shit storm for Shepard. The Alliance officer that we ran into, Kaidan... well, he and Shepard were involved before. I know his... rejection hit her pretty hard."

"They were involved?" she asked, frowning.

"Yes, am I saying that right?" he asked, wondering if something had been lost in translation.

"Yes. Of course. I just... I was under the impression that there was something between..." the girl stopped herself, covering her mouth.

Garrus was curious now. "Between who?" he asked.

Kelly sighed and said. "Well it is just based on things that I have noticed, but I thought that she was involved with... well, you."

"Me?" Garrus asked, his shock evident in his voice. "Why would you say that?"

She flushed. "Well, for one thing, she can't keep her eyes off you. Then there is the affinity she has developed for a particular shade of blue," Kelly hinted. "When you enter a room, she turns to face you. Body language is easy to read when people don't know you're looking."

Garrus was taken aback. Shepard had never said anything about this, but then, neither had he. He had noticed himself noticing Shepard much more than should be appropriate. It wasn't appropriate. That was the point. "Um, okay, thanks," he said turning and stepping back into the elevator, forgetting all about the other questions he had wanted to ask Kelly.

* * *

 

Shepard felt like her head was way too large for her body. She couldn't remember much, but what she did remember, haunted her. So many lives had been lost on Aratoht. She closed her eyes hard, wishing she could go back to sleep. At least while she was passed out she wasn't thinking about the weight on her shoulders. She sat up slowly, the room threatening to fall off kilter. She'd been dressed in a set of scrubs and her armor was set on a chair beside her bed. The wounds in her side and leg were nothing compared to the pounding in her head. "Commander?"

The sultry voice of the Normandy's AI came softly over the speakers as her avatar blinked to life near the doorway. "Yes, EDI?" Shepard rasped. She was really thirsty. She spotted a glass of water beside her bed and reached for it.

"We have been in Alliance space for several hours. Admiral Hackett wishes to speak with you once you are feeling up to it," she purred, never once raising her voice. Her tone suggested that she was aware that Shepard had a headache and she was politely making as little noise as possible. Shepard was grateful as she sipped her water. The liquid was cool as it slid down her throat.

"Hackett is here?" she asked, her addled mind catching up with what EDI had said.

"Yes, Shepard. He boarded some time ago and Mr. Moreau has been keeping him company on the bridge," she said.

"Oh, no," Shepard groaned. It was awful that the Admiral had been subjected to Joker for hours, but she was also grateful that he wasn't able to snoop around her ship. "Have the Admiral come here. I'll see him now."

* * *

 

The debrief with Hackett was all sorts of unpleasant. First she had to describe everything she remembered, reliving the hell over again as she spoke. Then she had to explain why both his good friend and 305,000 Batartians had been killed. She felt awful. All she wanted was to curl up in a ball and not care about anything for at least a month. At least Hackett was understanding. He allowed her to go free, since she was technically not in the Alliance anymore, if she agreed to turn herself in after the mess with the Collectors was over. Once he left, she sighed and slowly found her way to the mess hall where she grabbed a ration bar from Rupert and left to go to her cabin. She sat down on her couch, lifting her feet up, and picked at the unappetizing rations. Her stomach still felt like it was doing back flips every time she moved her head. Chakwas had allowed her to leave the med bay only if she kept her biotics offline for at least a week. That was fine with her. Her brain already felt like mush. No need to microwave it.

While she sat, she thought about Kaidan and suddenly his departure did not feel like such a tragedy. When she thought she was going to die, there had been only one person on her mind. She sighed, setting the uneaten ration bar on the coffee table and running her fingers through her hair. She felt grimy, but a shower felt like too much work. How had she developed feelings for her best friend? There was no way he would ever reciprocate. He had said that humans didn't attract him. _But you don't think Turians are attractive either_. Her brain helpfully reminded her. "Oh, shut up," she grumbled, pulling her fingers from her hair. She stood and shuffled to her terminal to read her emails. The mission had to continue, and maybe a bit of research would help her stop thinking about Garrus.

The first thing that popped up in front of her was the unopened mail she'd received from Kaidan. She bit her lip, her finger hovering over the delete button. _Just see what it says._ She flipped the message open and started to read.

_Shepard,_

_I'm sorry for what I said back on Horizon. I spent two years pulling myself back together after you went down with the Normandy. It took me a long time to get over my guilt for surviving and move on. I'd finally let my friends talk me into going out for drinks with a doctor on the Citadel. Nothing serious, but trying to let myself have a life again, you know?_

_Then I saw you, and everything pulled hard to port. You were standing in front of me, but you were with Cerberus. I guess I really don't know who either of us is anymore. Do you even remember that night before Ilos? That night meant everything to me... Maybe it meant as much to you, but a lot has changed in the last two years and I can't just put that aside._

_But please be careful. I've watched too many people close to me die- On Eden Prime, on Virmire, on Horizon, on the Normandy. I couldn't bear it if I lost you again. If you're still the woman I remember, I know you'll find a way to stop these Collector attacks, but Cerberus is too dangerous to be trusted. Watch yourself._

_When things settle down a little... maybe... I don't know. Just take care._

_-Kaidan_

Her heart was racing. As hurtful as the letter was, it was oddly inspiring to boot. She had been feeling like nothing she was doing was getting any closer to saving the universe, but Kaidan still believed in her. Even if she couldn't love him anymore, it was good to know he still cared. He hadn't fully rejected her. She sent the letter to her archives, keeping it for sentimentality's sake. She certainly understood his 'hard to port' reference. She had felt the same when she realized that Archangel was really Garrus. Relief mixed with terror that neither of them was the same person anymore. Even though the two years she was gone felt like overnight to her, she was different. She knew that. She didn't feel like herself sometimes, and it wasn't just the fancy upgrades. She supposed that didn't need to be a bad thing.

She took a deep breath and pulled up the dossiers that the Illusive Man had sent to her.

_Thane Krios_

_Quick- kill biotic specialist- Expert sniper_

_Thane Krios is a drell trained from childhood as an elite assassin, proficient in both long-range sniping kills and close infiltration. He has slowed his activities in recent years but is rumored to have a target on Illium._

Lovely, an assassin. She guessed it couldn't be any worse than having Jack lurking down in the engineering pit.

_Justicar Samara_

_Biotics strength near that of an Asari matriarch- Extensive weapons training._

_Samara is a justicar, a rare member of an Asari monastic group trained in enhanced combat biotics alongside standard weapons. Samara was recently sighted on Illium, outside normal Asari space._

Samara sounded extremely useful. Another powerful biotic who was trained in weaponry was always a plus. She was just about to open the piece of mail that contained news about Tali when her door chittered followed by EDI saying, "Shepard, Officer Vakarian is outside the door requesting entry."

"Well, let him in," Shepard replied. The door opened and she turned in her seat to see him standing in the doorway with two plates. "Hey, Big Guy." She felt her face flushing as she looked him over.

"I uh... I figured you might be hungry. I also knew you probably weren't interested in socializing in the mess hall," he stammered as he stood in the doorway. She'd never seen him hover like that before. Usually, he just let himself in.

"Well, don't just stand there," she gestured toward the coffee table. "I need to read this last dossier. It's about Tali."

"Jumping straight back into work I see," he scolded, stepping in and heading to set the plates down on the table. Then he came back up to lean on the desk his head right next to hers. "What news is there on our favorite Quarian?" His voice rumbled in her ear, so close she imagined she could feel it. She shuddered and busied herself opening the dossier.

_Tali'Zorah vas Neema_

_Expert in combat tech, systems hacking- Strong engineering background, familiar with Normandy._

_Formerly listed as Tali'Zorah nar Rayya, the Quarian engineer earned her adult name after helping Shepard defeat Saren two years ago. Tali is currently on a classified assignment for the Migrant Fleet Admiralty Board on Haestrom, deep in Geth-controlled space._

"Not that I don't trust Tali to be competent in fighting Geth, but that sounds a bit dangerous," Shepard pointed out.

"You know me. I'm always willing to help out a friend," he said putting a hand on Shepard's shoulder. His touch was more than welcome and she felt her body relax. "Let's get Joker to set a course for Haestrom. We need to get our Quarian back."

She wholeheartedly agreed. Pushing down the comm button she called to Joker. "Hey, Joker. Once everyone is settled back in, set a course for Haestrom."

There was a momentary pause, then he said, "Are you sure, Commander? Don't you need a little down time between your near death experiences?"

She smiled. "It'll take at least two weeks to get to Haestrom from here, Joker. You know me. Travel time _is_ my down time."

"If you insist," he sighed and closed the channel.

"He's right you know, Shepard. You look exhausted," Garrus informed her as he straightened and crossed his arms.

"I can't sleep. Not tonight," she admitted, her memories of the asteroid flooding back.

She stood, pushing past him to head down into the living area, wringing her hands. "Hey, hey," he followed her, stopping her with a hand on her shoulder. She turned to face him and he took her hands to stop them from winding around each other. They still trembled under his touch and she took a deep breath. "What happened down there?" he asked softly, never breaking eye contact.

She gently pulled her hands away and shoved them under her arms, wishing that she didn't have to relive everything. The mission had been classified, but there was no way she could go without telling him. He knew everything about her. She'd never kept a secret from him. _Well, almost never_. She sighed and moved to the couch, sitting on her feet and patting the space beside her. "Let's eat and I'll tell you all about it."

* * *

 

Shepard was poking around a small green piece of food that looked like a miniature tree on her plate. She had barely touched her food. Garrus studied her face as she spoke about the horrible decisions she'd been faced with in the last three days. Her cheeks looked slightly gaunt, her eyes had dark rings under them and the facial scarring from her cybernetics that had all but disappeared were once again ravaging her cheeks and forehead. He was concerned. She was not handling much of this as well as she pretended to. She'd told him about her escape on Mindoir when she was a child, but her usual rage that made her hate Batarians was completely absent as she told him that she had made the decision to condemn over 300,000 colonists to death. "I tried to warn them, Garrus, but there just wasn't time. I was under fire and my communications got cut off." She set her fork down and leaned over to put the plate back on the table.

He sighed and set his own plate down. "Shepard, you did everything you could. It was no better a situation than on Virmire, except this time it wasn't a friend..."

"No, it was innocent victims. People I could have saved," she cut him off.

"Shepard, you can't save everyone. Every good Turian knows that. Blaming yourself will get you nowhere. The Reapers have declared war and every war has it's casualties," he reminded her.

She stared at her hands where the blue of her nails taunted him. Was Kelly right? Could Shepard have feelings for him? That was crazy. He knew she didn't think Turians were attractive. He needed to stop thinking about this. Shepard needed a friend right now, not some awkward Turian exploring his strange feelings for his human CO. They were friends, nothing more.

The silence was drawing longer as she began to drift from the conversation in silence. He allowed her, not wanting to force her to think about the crap she had faced alone. She would never be alone again, not if he could help it. "Shepard," he said tentatively reaching for her hands. She jumped at the sudden break in the silence and he dropped his hand, not wanting to spook her. She was really in a bad state. "You really should rest if you're not going to eat," he suggested.

She looked up at him finally and her green eyes were hazy. She nodded reluctantly and he stood to go, reaching to gather the plates. She grabbed his arm and her eyes were wide. "Wait," he took his hands away from the plates and gave her a questioning look. "Will you stay? Just like old times?" She attempted a smile.

It was precious. His mandibles parted as he returned the expression. "If that's what you want, then sure. My calibrating can wait until morning."

"How many times can you calibrate those guns?" she asked, her smile widening into one that was at least genuine as she stood to head for the bed.

"You can never be too careful, Shepard. I always save my best calibrations for emergencies." He climbed onto the bed beside her and she snuggled close to him. His heart raced, having her so close to him. He inhaled her scent. Her usual cherries and vanilla was muted by the scent that made her who she was. The scent he had recognized from that moment she had reappeared in his life on Omega. There was an added scent that was the Eezo in her blood that powered her biotics. As she pulled the blanket up to huddle underneath, there was something else. Cinnamon. He remembered that scent from their days on the old Normandy. Usually he only smelled it after she'd spent any time around Kaidan. It was very faint and he could be mistaken, but that was the scent that her personal pheromones released into the air. He inhaled again, hiding the action by putting his arm under her head. She liked to use his arm as a pillow, every time they did this. The scent was gone and he brushed it off. Perhaps he was inventing things as his own feelings tumbled around in confusion.

 


	17. Revenge for a Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tali comes back and Garrus gets news.

Once she had felt up to it, Shepard had returned to her usual routine. She made her rounds, breaking down barriers and learning about her squad. Jack had hundreds of stories about her days as a pirate which she was more than willing to share now that Shepard had helped her turn her childhood torture into a crater on Pragia. Kasumi, when she wasn't spending time in her virtual world with her dead partner, was more than happy to regale Shepard with her tales of thievery. Zaeed would not do much more than grunt, but if she got him drunk enough, he would open up pretty easily. Jacob and Mordin were open books when you caught them at a good time and Miranda had the strangest mood swings that Shepard had ever seen. One day she would smile and joke with the rest of the crew and then the next day she would be all scowls. She was proving to be a harder puzzle than Zaeed, but Shepard persisted.

What was most disconcerting was the fact that Garrus seemed to be avoiding her like the plague. She worried that she had said or done something to offend him in some way the last night they had spent huddled together. He had been fine until the morning, than he had nearly fled her cabin like his ass was on fire. Every time she ventured to the main battery, he would brush off her attempts at conversation. _Can it wait for a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations._ She was starting to hate that word.

When they finally arrived at Haestrom, she considered spitefully leaving him behind, but when she arrived at the shuttle bay, he was already there armed and armored. She scowled as she called for Kasumi to meet them. If they were to be fighting Geth, she needed as much tech power as she could get.

The planet's surface was horrible. EDI warned them of an environmental hazard that kept them to the shadows to alleviate the burning heat of the sun. If they so much as stepped out of the shade, their shields dropped like flies. The heat was unbearable. "Sometimes I wish I could sweat," Garrus grumbled as they made their way into an abandoned Quarian city.

"Sometimes I wish I couldn't," she countered, rubbing her arm over her forehead to remove some of the moisture that dripped from her skin. "Just be glad you're not freezing like on Noveria."

His response was cut off by Kasumi, "Drop ship incoming!"

"Just like old times," Garrus quipped as he ran for cover while the Geth poured from the sky.

The heat didn't bother the mechanical assholes whatsoever. Shepard cursed audibly several times as the Geth tried to draw them out of cover and into the sun to fry their shields. Kasumi was having a ball as she flitted in and out of her tactical cloak and took out most of the Geth with little help from them. "She's showing you up, Big Guy," Shepard taunted, trying to get something out of her friend.

He hummed deep in his chest and peered through his scope to drop another trooper. "I'm still the better shot," he pointed out.

"Of course you are," Shepard said, picking off three Geth in quick succession with perfect head shots.

"So that's how it's going to be, huh?" She felt her tension float away as Garrus turned a smile to her.

"Bring it on Vakarian," she challenged.

As they overcame the obstacles on their way to find Tali, she and Garrus traded taunts and tried to outmaneuver each other to take out more Geth than the other. They gathered demo charges from surrounding buildings to get past an obstruction that a geth ship had knocked into their path as they made contact with some Quarian soldiers over a radio. Shepard gleefully used her biotics to jam the charges in the side of the giant concrete pillar and ran for cover. She was glad to find her biotics were back to full strength after they had been stripped by the Reaper artifact. The explosion rocked the ground as the pillar was destroyed. After the smoke cleared they made their way inside where they found a sort of operations base. As Shepard hunted for clues about what the Quarians might be doing there, she suddenly heard a familiar voice. She spun to see a holographic image of the upper half of Tali's body. "Tali'Zorah to base camp. Come in base camp." She made her way to the console. "Hello? Is anyone there?"

"Tali, it's Shepard," she said activating the console.

"Shepard? I'm not complaining, but you show up at the strangest times. What are you doing in the middle of Geth space?" Tali asked, her voice confirming her surprise.

Shepard smiled. "I was in the neighborhood. I thought you might need a hand."

"Thanks for coming, Shepard. It means a lot to hear your voice." Tali didn't hesitate to lay out the situation. She helped Shepard get the door open and Shepard and her team moved out.

They soon found a bunker with windows that were retracted. "Let's see if we can get a look at the observatory," Shepard said as she punched in a hack to lift the metal panes.

She immediately regretted her decision as she spotted across the field a giant Geth turning to see what had made the noise. "Colossus!" Garrus shouted.

"Get down!" Shepard threw herself to the ground as the Colossus fired on them. She scurried in an army crawl to get out of the sight of the windows. "Everyone alright?"

"It's always like this with you, isn't it?" Kasumi asked standing and brushing herself off.

"Definitely like old times," Garrus chuckled as he patted her shoulder and passed to open the door that would lead them down to the field. She silently hoped he would maintain their easy friendship after they got back to the ship. She missed him.

Just below the windows outside, they ran into the last remaining Quarian soldier. Kal'Reeger gave them the rundown of what he was doing and where Tali was. Shepard gave him leave to stand down. She could at least save one of Tali's friends. They had to get close to the Colossus to take it down as it had a program that regenerated its shields while it was huddled like a cocooned caterpillar. She had Garrus take the high road and she sent Kasumi to the left while she personally fought down the middle. The Geth swarmed her the fastest and she was grateful for the sniper coverage that Garrus was providing her from above. She took a quick assessment of the Colossus and knew that its shields would go down pretty quickly with a concentrated overload. That would give her a few seconds while it was vulnerable before it hunkered down and healed itself. Not a large window, but it was the only option they had. She prepared her overload while Garrus kept the Geth from overwhelming her. "Okay," she said as the overload charged. "I'm going in, cover me."

"Wait, Shepard!" Garrus protested, but she had already vaulted her cover and was legging it toward the platform where the Colossus was standing. With her overload ready, she scurried up onto the small space as Garrus cursed in Turian in her ear. She got as close as she could to the Colossus as it attempted to turn its giant body to get a bead on her. She set off her overload directly into its underbelly. It shuddered as it's shields dropped. She attempted to back pedal but the thing was quick to close up on itself, trapping her inside. She activated her omnitool so she could see in the dark confines of the Colossus. "Shepard, are you alright?"

"Not now, Big Guy. I gotta blow up a Colossus," She heard more cursing as she hunted for the perfect spot. She wriggled to get the grenade launcher from her back. As quick as she could, she pulled one of the grenades from the chamber and stuffed it into the crack she'd deemed the perfect spot. Throwing up a barrier to protect herself, she used her overload one more time to set off the grenade. The cursing in her ear was replaced with panicked shouting after a split second of ringing that the explosion caused. When she opened her eyes, the darkness was gone. That was a good sign.

"Did I get it?" she asked, a little dazed, but otherwise unharmed.

"Spirits, Shepard. That is the second time you've tried to blow yourself up with a Colossus," Garrus said with a small smile on his face as he jogged up to her and concluded she was in one piece.

"Hey, at least I saved you the trouble of taking the killing shot this time," she grinned. "I believe that puts me in the lead for kills."

"Bull," Garrus cocked his rifle.

"I think Shep is right," Kasumi shrugged, coming out of her cloak beside Shepard.

"Ha! See, Big Guy, I win," She stuck her tongue out at him and he chuckled.

"Fine, but I maintain that I am the one with the larger overall kill count," he countered.

"No fair. You can't count the two years I was dead," she complained, crossing her arms.

He grinned and walked past her, a cocky tone in his voice and swagger in his step as he said, "I wasn't."

She couldn't help biting her lip as she watched him stroll toward the door to the observatory that Tali had just unlocked. Kasumi nudged her with her elbow, her head dipping as she winked and disappeared under her tactical cloak. "Shut up, Kasumi," Shepard grumbled, her cheeks flushing, as she realized she'd been caught checking out Garrus.

Tali was extremely irritated with her people, it seemed. When Shepard asked her about joining them, she agreed. The mission she had been on ended with the data she had recovered about the rate of aging of the sun on Haestrom. Shepard could feel the sunburn on her cheeks already starting to dry out her skin as Tali explained that the star was deteriorating much faster than it should be. Kal'Reeger found his way to them and Tali was massively relieved that he had survived. He made it quite clear that he was leaving Tali in Shepard's hands with a warning to keep her safe. Shepard took him very seriously and agreed to watch over her friend.

When they got back to the Normandy, Garrus seemed to be back to his usual self. She didn't have a chance to test the waters though as Jacob met her and Tali in the debrief room. "Cerberus saw footage of you in action, Tali'Zorah. We look forward to having you on the team. Your engineering expertise will really benefit the mission."

Tali paced back and forth in front of Shepard, sizing up Jacob behind her helmet. "I don't know who you are, but Cerberus threatened the security of the Migrant Fleet. Don't make nice."

Shepard stepped in to diffuse the situation. "You don't have to like them Tali, but we're on the same side this time."

"I assumed that you were undercover, Shepard, maybe even planning to blow Cerberus up. If that's the case, I'll loan you a grenade." She stopped her pacing in front of Shepard and turned herself toward Jacob with body language that Shepard recognized as a glare. "Otherwise, I'm here for you, not for them."

"If it helps, check out the Normandy while you're here. We've gotten a few upgrades," Shepard offered, smiling at her old friend and loving how some things never changed.

Jacob stepped up. "I'll get Tali'Zorah the necessary security clearance to access our systems."

"Please do," Tali said with a mocking tone, knowing she didn't need Jacob to get into the systems. "I can't be part of your team if I don't know how the ship works. I'll be in engineering if you need me," she continued, passing Shepard on her way from the room and directing her last sentence at her.

"Don't forget to introduce yourself to EDI, the ship's new artificial intelligence," Jacob called after her just as she passed through the doorway.

Tali stopped dead in her tracks to turn and throw another glare at Jacob. Shepard felt herself almost choke out a laugh as the Quarian's stare bored holes in Jacob, making the well toned, capable man take a step back. Without a word Tali left, presumably to make herself a home in engineering much like she had on the old Normandy. "Word of advice," Shepard said before leaving, herself. "Don't mention sentient machines in front of Tali. It's a bit of a sore subject."

* * *

 

In the hubbub of bringing Tali on board and getting her settled, Shepard didn't have time to pay a visit to Garrus. She showered and headed for the galaxy map before she started her rounds for the evening. Before she could set a course for Illium, Kelly stopped her. "Is there something I should know?" Shepard asked as the girl looked distressed.

"Garrus received some news that lit a fire in his eyes," Kelly said, her voice soft as if she really didn't want to be the one to tell Shepard about this. "You may want to go and talk with him to see what might be wrong."

"Thanks," Shepard said, already heading for the elevator to get to the forward battery. She didn't find Garrus in his usual place and she grew concerned. What could have drawn him from his calibrations? "EDI, can you tell me where Garrus is?"

"Mr. Vakarian is in the workout room, Shepard. His vitals are spiking erratically, indicating emotional distress. I advise caution," EDI provided.

Shepard frantically pushed the button on the elevator as she went down. "Come on," she grumbled.

"Depressing the button in quick succession will not make the elevator move faster, Shepard," EDI informed her.

"Thanks, EDI. I know that." The machine stopped commenting, Shepard's tone clearly revealing she wasn't interested in the computer's opinion.

As soon as she entered the workout room, she heard Garrus' familiar flanged voice grunting with effort as he did a number on the punching bag, his subharmonics rumbling in anger. She knew he was instantly aware that she had arrived because he stopped punching and said, "Shepard, I'm glad you came by. I've got something. I may need your help." She stepped further into the room to get a better look at him. He resumed punching the bag. He was shirtless. She stopped in her tracks, crossing her arms as she took in the naked chest of a Turian. It was a first for her and she couldn't say that this particular Turian put her off. Beneath the protective plates that covered almost all of his body, she could see bits of well toned muscle under his leathery skin. His carapace rounded out his back and the metal fused in his skin gave him a sparkling sheen in the light. It was actually beautiful. The widened set of his chest tapered into the V shape of his stomach. She shook off the clench in her chest and moved closer to hear him out, grabbing the bag as he usually did for her. "You remember Sidonis? The one who betrayed my team. I found a lead on him. There's a specialist on the Citadel, name's Fade. He's an expert at helping people disappear."

"Where do we find Fade?" she asked, needing no other prodding from him. He'd helped her so many times. The least she could do was give him this closure. She remembered the names carved in his visor and the sadness he'd carried after leaving Omega. Sidonis deserved everything Garrus had planned for him.

"I've arranged a meeting. We'll meet him in a warehouse near the neon markets down on Zakera Ward." He paused, stopping the beating he was giving the bag and peered around it to look her in the face. "Thanks Shepard. I appreciate you taking the time to help me."

"Are you kidding? Anything for my favorite Turian." She smiled genuinely for what felt like the first time in a long time, then indicated he should beat up the bag some more, knowing it always made her feel better.

* * *

 

When they arrived on the Citadel, Shepard shared in Garrus' tension. She knew this was a personal mission for him, and she didn't want to impose one of her people on him as backup. Instead, she asked Tali to tag along. Garrus and her were pretty good friends and Shepard thought it was a good match. They arrived for the meeting in the warehouse to speak to Fade. Shepard was not convinced when a Volus appeared and asked which of them wanted to disappear. "I'd rather you make someone re-appear," Garrus suggested, eyeing the two heavily armed Krogan guarding the short pudgy alien.

"Uh... that's not the service we provide," the Volus stammered in between breaths through his suit.

"Make an exception. Just this once, " Garrus pulled his pistol out, threatening the volus.

"Dammit... Quick... Shoot them! Shoot them.... you lumbering mountains," Before the Volus could finish his sentence around the short gasping breaths all Volus were prone to take every few seconds, Shepard had pulled out her own pistol and she and Garrus had taken out a Krogen each and had their guns trained on the smaller alien.

"Too slow," Shepard taunted.

The Volus glanced behind himself at the dead Krogan and sighed. "Why do I even bother?"

Shepard stepped forward. "We need to find a client of yours. I suggest you cooperate."

"Wait!" The Volus hung his head in shame. "I'm not the one you want to talk to. I'm not Fade."

"I knew it," she grumbled stepping back toward Garrus and crossing her arms.

She had played bad cop and now it was Garrus' turn. He stepped up to kneel in front of the Volus and said in a gentle, yet persuasive voice, "Well then, maybe you'd like to tell us where to find him."

"Yes! Of course. He's in the factory district, works out of the old prefab foundry."

"I know the place," Garrus said, turning his head toward her to speak.

The Volus continued, "Uh... he's got a lot of mercs there... Blue suns. Harkin thinks they're protecting him."

Shepard wrinkled her nose, remembering the nasty man sitting in Chora's Den and making eyes at her as she tried to find out where Garrus was after her first meeting with the Council. That felt like forever ago. "How the hell did Harkin end up being the Fade?"

"Well," the Volus explained. "He got fired from C-Sec a while back. He used his knowledge of C-Sec and their systems to help a few people disappear. Then he made himself disappear, and Fade was born. So to speak."

"Interesting," Garrus said standing from his crouch. "But it changes nothing. We still need to find him before we can get to Sidonis."

"I'm looking forward to seeing Harkin again," she agreed, cracking her knuckles. She owed him a good punch for ogling her the last time.

"I'm sure he'll be excited to see both of us," Garrus agreed. "We need to go to the transit station. I can get us to him from there."

"So I... I can go?" the Volus stammered.

"Sure," Garrus said with a grin. "but if we don't find Harkin, we'll be back for you." Both of them brandished their pistols at him again.

"Oh, good," the Volus said with sarcasm as he waddled away. Shepard found it hard to control the spurt of laughter that threatened to bubble to the surface as she put her pistol in its holster and followed Garrus to the transit hub.

He piloted their rented skycar to the foundry the Volus had told them Harkin was using as his base. "There he is," Shepard shouted, recognizing Harkin as she stepped out of the car.

"Shepard?" Harkin squinted like he didn't believe his eyes. He apparently was one of the only people left in the universe that didn't know she was alive. "Don't just stand there!" he shouted at the mercs surrounding him. "Stop them! Stop them!"

As he turned and fled inside the foundry, Garrus shouted after him, drawing his assault rifle. "Run all you want, Harkin. We'll find you!"

They fought through the foundry, Tali falling back into the routine of battle like she had never left. It was good to have someone she knew so well fighting at her side again. Garrus on the other hand was getting more livid by the second. Each merc he killed that wasn't Harkin pissed him off more. They reached a small office area where Shepard took the time to stop and open the windows to take a look out to the next area of the factory, mapping the kill zones and possible cover. As she studied the area, she looked to Garrus who was fidgeting with his rifle and looking out over the layout himself. "So, Harkin's finally gone completely bad," she commented, worried about Garrus' state of mind.

"He was always a pain in the ass," Garrus said setting down his rifle for a moment and leaning his palms on the desk. "But I'm in no mood for his games. If he doesn't cooperate, I'll beat him within an inch of his life."

"You seem to be getting tense, Garrus," she said, placing a hand on his shoulder and hoping he would look at her.

Instead of humoring her, he continued to stare out the window. "Harkin may know why Sidonis wanted to disappear. If so, he knows why we're here and I don't want him tipping Sidonis off." He spared her a very short glance before returning his eyes to the factory floor. She sighed and dropped her hand, moving to stand a bit closer to the window herself. She spotted movement out of the corner of her eye and she drew her pistol and took cover behind a file cabinet as Garrus ducked, his rifle back in his hands. "Did you see that?"

"I saw something," she agreed.

"He's getting ready for us," Garrus finally laid his eyes on her and she could see the fear of losing Sidonis painted across his features.

"We won't catch him waiting in here," she said, signaling to Tali that they were moving.

"Right behind you," Garrus said, standing and following her out the door.

Tali proved extremely useful as they made it to the end of the warehouse and Harkin sent two heavy mechs on them. She used her drones as distractions as they whittled down one before blowing it close to the second and doing significant damage to its shields. After that, it was easy to take down, one bullet at a time, as it tried to get up to where they had secured the high ground. Once both mechs were down, Shepard climbed up the staggered platforms to get to the office where Harkin was hiding. She and Tali crept up to the first door at a crouch and Garrus circled around the back. She stood and pointed her gun at Harkin who turned to flee out the other door. "You were close, but not close enough," he taunted, thinking he was getting away.

When the door opened, Garrus was waiting on the other side. His pistol came up and he smacked Harkin in the nose with the butt of the gun, stunning the man. Then as Harkin was holding his nose and hunched over groaning, Garrus grabbed him and slammed him against the wall, holding him much like Grunt had held her when she'd let him out of the tank. "So, Fade... Couldn't make yourself disappear, huh?"

"Come on, Garrus. We can work this out. Whaddaya need?" Harkin sniveled as the large Turian held him with their faces inches apart.

Garrus shoved him a bit before releasing him and turning away. "I'm looking for someone."

Harkin chuckled and brushed himself off, thinking he could gain the upper hand. "Well, I guess we both have something the other one wants."

That was a mistake. Garrus turned on him and faster than Shepard knew possible, he had a knee in the man's gut, making him double over then fall to his hands and knees, grunting. Shepard crossed her arms and smirked. "That had to hurt. Maybe you should just tell us what we want to know."

Harkin regained his breath and pushed himself back to his feet, scowling. "Maybe. I still haven't heard what you want."

"You helped a friend of mine disappear," Garrus informed him. "I need to find him."

"I might need a little more information than that," Harkin turned his scowl on Garrus.

"His name was Sidonis. Turian, came from the..." Garrus began.

"I know who he is, and I'm not telling you squat." Harkin said.

"Is this information really worth all the trouble?" Shepard asked before Garrus could abuse the man again.

"I don't give out client information. It's bad for business."

Harkin had a split second to look smug before Garrus kneed him in the gut again. Harkin fell to the floor and Garrus pushed him over and placed a foot on the man's chest. "You know what else is bad for business?" He pressed down harder. "A broken neck."

Harkin struggled under the pressure of Garrus' foot. "All right! All right! Get off me!" He shouted, short of breath. Shepard uncrossed her arms and again her hand found Garrus' shoulder. He glanced at her and lifted his foot so Harkin could sit up. "Terminus really changed you, huh, Garrus?" Harkin rasped.

"No, but Sidonis... opened my eyes. Now arrange a meeting."

When Harkin stood, then hesitated, looking at his comm terminal, Garrus tossed his head to get him moving. "I'm going," the man grumbled. During a short conversation which Shepard could only hear one side of, Garrus took his pistol out again and was admiring it, nodding to himself. Shepard was worried, but decided to let things play out. Garrus knew what he was doing, even if he was emotionally invested. "It's all good. He wants to meet you in front of Orbital Lounge. Middle of the day," Harkin announced. "So, if our business is done, I'll be going..."

"I don't think so," Garrus gripped Harkin up by his shirt. "You're a criminal now, Harkin."

"So what... you're just going to kill me? That's not your style, Garrus." Harkin stammered.

Garrus scared Shepard for a moment as he stared Harkin down. The man was a sleaze, but he didn't deserve to be killed. She breathed a sigh of relief as Garrus let go of the man's shirt and said, "Kill you? No, but I don't mind slowing you down a little." He raised the pistol and took a shot in Harkin's leg. It was not a kill shot near any arteries, but it was certainly debilitating. "Maybe give C-Sec a blood trail to follow."

"Bastard!" Harkin shouted from his place on the floor where he clutched his brand new hole.

They turned away and Shepard snorted. "I wouldn't have shot him in the leg."

"What'd I ever do to you?" Harkin whined as they walked away.

"Sidonis better be there, or I'm coming back to finish the job," Garrus quipped.

Garrus piloted the skycar silently to the Orbital Lounge and parked it up near the rafters out of sight. "Harkin's a bloody menace," he grumbled after letting go of the steering controls. "We shouldn't have just let him go. He deserved to be punished."

"I'm getting a little worried about you Garrus," she said, unable to watch him spiraling anymore. She regretted letting him shoot Harkin. "You were pretty hard on Harkin."

"You don't think he deserved it?" Garrus asked turning to rest his intense gaze on her.

"It's just not like you," she admitted.

"What do you want from me, Shepard? What would you do if someone betrayed you?" he asked, looking away and not allowing her to read his face. The cybernetic bandage blinked softly in the darkness of the enclosed space.

"I'm not sure," she admitted. "But I wouldn't let it change me."

"I would have said the same thing before it happened to me," he glanced back at her again. His expression was painful. This was different than the mission she had taken him on to stop Dr. Saleon. It was personal. This Sidonis had been responsible for the deaths of everyone he called friend. But why had the Turian done it? Shepard knew that Garrus was usually an excellent judge of character and he wouldn't have taken Sidonis in if he hadn't seen some good in him.

"It's not too late," she practically begged. "You don't have to go through with this."

"Who's going to bring Sidonis to justice if I don't? Nobody else knows what he's done. Nobody else cares. I don't see any other options." He turned away shaking his head.

"Let me talk to him," she offered, wanting to get the whole story, not just what Garrus had seen.

"Talk all you want, but it won't change my mind," he snapped. "I don't care what his reasons were. He screwed us... he deserves to die."

"I understand what you're going through, but do you really want to kill him?" she asked, softening her voice to try and reach the side of him that she knew could forgive.

"I appreciate your concern, but I'm not you." His voice was beginning to hold frustration toward her for trying to talk him out of this.

" _This_ isn't you either!" She felt like grabbing him and shaking him.

"Really? I've always hated injustice. The thought that Sidonis could get away with this...." There was a wry chuckle in his voice. "Why should he go on living while 10 good men lie in unmarked graves?" He sighed. "I'm sorry, Shepard. Words aren't going to solve this problem. I need to set up." He took stock of the area, his visor reading the same sniper points as hers. She scowled at his resistance to her practically begging him to let this go. He was heading down a dark path and she hated that she had allowed herself to be a party to it. "I can get a clear shot from over there," he pointed just ahead of them in a dark catwalk.

"What do you need me to do?" she asked sighing.

"Keep him talking and don't get in my way. I'll let you know when he's in my sights." Shepard studied the catwalk and his sight-line, making sure she had a way to block him. "Give me a signal so I know you're ready, and I'll take the shot. You better go, he'll be here soon."

Shepard shifted to the driver's seat as Garrus got out to set up his shot. He closed the door of the skycar, staring in at her, the look on his face tearing her apart. As she took off and left him, she sighed and her stomach knotted up. "You're not really going to let him do this, are you?" Tali asked, concern in her voice through the helmet.

"Not if I can help it," she said piloting the car down to the parking zone just outside the Orbital Lounge.

* * *

 

Garrus watched Shepard fly off, unsure why her words made him feel so bad. He had been determined that Sidonis needed to die. He'd been responsible for the deaths of all of his friends on Omega. The people who had become almost like family. Why shouldn't he die? Shepard had an extremely direct moral compass and if she saw something he wasn't seeing, maybe he was wrong. She'd allowed him to kill Saleon with no qualms, but the Salarian had been truly evil. But Shepard didn't know Sidonis, how could she judge whether he deserved to die?

Garrus took his spot that he'd chosen and watched Shepard park the skycar while he opened his sniper rifle, activating the scope so he could get a better look at the ground. "Shepard, do you read me?"

"Loud and clear," she returned over the comm. Her voice was clipped. It was the tone she used when she had her heart set on something. He begged the spirits that she wouldn't drag this out. He watched her and Tali wander up toward the seating area outside the Lounge and scanned the area. His mandibles fluttered with nerves. He needed to calm himself. Suddenly he spotted Sidonis, sitting on a bench in a conspicuous red yellow and blue outfit. The other Turian looked nervous, sitting forward and rubbing his hands together. He was sitting in the middle of far too many other people and Garrus, ground his teeth.

"All right, there he is. Wave him over and keep him talking," he whispered into his comm, taking a deep breath and pulling his mandibles in close to his face.

He watched Shepard pick Sidonis out of the crowd and she caught his eye and used two fingers to beckon him to her. So far she was showing no signs of stopping him, aside from the determined set of her shoulders. Tali was standing back, out of the way. "Let's get this over with." Sidonis' voice picked up on Shepard's comm and Garrus seethed.

He tried to take aim, but Shepard's head was planted right in front of Sidonis' face. "You're in my shot, move to the side," he growled. She had to know what she was doing.

"Listen, Sidonis. I'm here to help you," Shepard said, still standing firmly in his shot.

"Don't ever say that name aloud," fear was resounding in his subvocals and Garrus ground his teeth.

"I'm a friend of Garrus'. He wants you dead, but I'm hoping that's not necessary." She still wasn't moving.

"Garrus? Is this some kind of joke?" Sidonis asked looking around as if he were going to bolt. If he got away... Garrus left the thought fall. He couldn't swear vengeance on Shepard. He shook his head and looked back through the scope. His heart was racing

"Dammit, Shepard! If he moves, I'm taking the shot!"

"You're not kidding, are you?" Sidonis said, the fear in his voice rising as he panicked. "Screw this. I'm not sticking around to find out. Tell Garrus, I had my own problems." He turned away to leave and Garrus took aim.

Shepard reached out and grabbed Sidonis' arm "Don't move," she said, her voice low so she didn't attract the attention of the crowd. Again, her head was in his shot.

"Get off me!" Sidonis said a little louder than was necessary, tugging his arm from her grip. He drew a few stares and Garrus saw Shepard glance around, noticing the attention.

"I am the _only_ thing standing between you and a hole in the head," she growled, sending the point home that she knew exactly what she was doing.

Garrus kept his eyes on the target, waiting for Sidonis to bolt. "Fuck," the Turian cursed, dropping his head in defeat. They had spent enough time together. Sidonis knew what Garrus was capable of doing with a clear shot. "Look, I didn't want to do it... I didn't have a choice."

"Everyone has a choice," Garrus pointed out, Shepard steadfastly in his shot. He stared at the back of her head through his scope and tried to will her to step aside.

"They got to me, said they'd kill me if I didn't help. What was I supposed to do?" Sidonis continued, trying to weasel out of his death by explaining to Shepard. She was listening carefully, taking in everything so she could accurately judge. He'd seen her in detective mode before. It usually meant she was considering letting someone go even if they didn't deserve it, like she had done with Balak on asteroid X57.

"Let me take the shot, Shepard. He's a damn coward," Garrus begged. He knew she heard him from the tension in her shoulders and the slight turn of her head toward the side where her comm was nestled in her ear.

"That's it?" she asked. "You were just trying to save yourself?"

Sidonis turned and began walking toward a railing and Shepard dogged his steps, keeping herself in the way of Garrus blowing his head off. "I know what I did. I know they died because of me, and I have to live with that." He leaned on the rail and sighed. "I wake up every night... sick... and sweating. Each of their faces staring at me... accusing me." Garrus looked up from his scope to glance at Sidonis with his own eyes. Was that genuine regret in his subvocals? "I'm already a dead man. I don't sleep. Food has no taste. Some days, I just want it to be over."

"Just give me the chance," Garrus said, watching through his scope again, ready to put the other Turian out of his misery. It was more than he deserved.

Shepard turned, looking directly at him and knowing he was staring her down in his scope. "You've gotta let it go, Garrus. He's already paying for his crime."

"He hasn't paid enough, He still has his life." He tried to convince her as she kept her eyes fixed on him, like she could see into his spirit.

"Look at him, Garrus. He's not alive. There's nothing left to kill." She gestured at Sidonis who didn't seem to hear the pleading in her voice as he stared off into nothing, locked in his own thoughts.

"My men... they deserved better," he said, his resolve cracking.

Sidonis spoke up, his voice low and keening. "Tell Garrus... I guess there's nothing I can say to make it right." He sighed, keeping his head low, the keening obvious.

Shepard still looked at Garrus, her own features full of sympathy and sorrow, but they didn't seem to be directed at Sidonis. Garrus' heart-rate slowed and he took a deep breath. "Just... go. Tell him to go..." He dropped his rifle in defeat. Shepard always knew best and she cared. Because he cared for her, he had to let this go, as much as he wanted Sidonis dead, he never wanted her to look at him like that again.

Her features shifted to hope as she turned back to Sidonis. "He's giving you a second chance, Sidonis. Don't waste it."

Sidonis stood straight and said, "I'll try Garrus. I'll make it up to you somehow." He looked to Shepard then and said more softly, "Thank you, for talking to him."

The two parted ways and as Sidonis walked away and Shepard spared him one last glance, Garrus shut down his rifle and with a sigh, holstered the weapon. He didn't know what to feel as Shepard and Tali brought the car back to pick him up. Shepard got out of the car and jogged up to him, a sympathetic smile on her face. Before she could speak, he said, "I know you wanna talk about this, but I don't. Not yet."

She moved closer and said, "I know it didn't go the way you planned, but I think its for the best."

"I'm not so sure," he sighed again, pacing. He couldn't look at her.

"Give it time," she assured him, her hand raised like she wanted to give him one of her signature pats that usually made him feel better.

"Yeah, maybe that'll be enough," he said, dodging the gesture. He didn't want to feel better. He wanted to go back to the Normandy and convince himself he'd made the right choice. "I wanna know I did the right thing." she dropped her hand, disappointment in her eyes, and he continued. "Not just for me... for my men. They deserve to be avenged, but when Sidonis was in my sights... I just couldn't do it."

"The lines between good and evil blur when we're looking at people we know," she said gently, as if she knew exactly how he felt.

"Yeah... there was still good in him. I could see it," he admitted, the sound of Sidonis' keening haunting his thoughts. "It's so much easier to see the world in black and white... Gray... I don't know what to do with gray."

"You gotta go with your instincts."

"My instincts are what got me into this mess," he said with another deep sigh. He wondered what she was picking up from his own subvocals as she studied his face without a hint in her own features of what she was feeling.

"Don't be too hard on yourself," she said, stepping closer out of nowhere and not allowing him to dodge the arm pat she'd been itching to share. Her fingers lingered on his upper arm as she gave him the smile that he always loved.

"Thanks, Shepard. For everything," he said, letting her know that she had helped by forcing out a half smile of his own that he knew hadn't reached his eyes. She dropped her hand finally with a snort nod of acceptance. "Let's get going. I need some distance from this place."

"I'm with you," she said, her words coated in a double meaning as she followed him to the car. He may always have her six, but on this mission, she had been his moral compass, leading him in more ways than one and he truly was grateful.

 


	18. Illium and Pheromones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard and Garrus reach an awkward but illuminating conclusion about each other.

Garrus was quiet as they returned to the Normandy. Shepard allowed him his space, knowing he would come to her when he was ready. She put Joker on the course for Illium so she could pick up the last two people on her list and then retired to her quarters. It had been an emotional mission for her as she watched her best friend nearly lose himself in a revenge plot. She'd have never forgiven herself and he would have never been able to live with that on his conscience if she'd stepped aside and let him take that shot. She'd been worried that he would hate her for not letting him destroy himself, but he had seemed amiable when they'd picked him up. There was still hope.

After changing out of her armor, she started her rounds, visiting each of her people, a few of them bringing her some personal concerns they wanted to handle before they moved forward against the Collectors. She was more than willing to help. The more focused her people were on the task at hand, the more likely they were to get out of this mess alive.

She stood outside the main battery, hovering in indecision. It was late and the mess was empty. At least she didn't look stupid standing outside the unlocked door, terrified to go in. It had been hours since they returned, but she wasn't certain he would be ready to open up to her. Then again, the door _was_ unlocked. She gathered herself, combing her fingers through her hair and knocked. The door opened and he was standing just inside at a console, calibrating. Figures. The conversation started as it usually did. He turned around to glance at her. "Shepard, need me for something?"

She took a breath, resigning herself for the rejection he'd been laying on her recently. ' _Can it wait for a bit? I'm in the middle of some calibrations._ ' "Hey Big Guy," she said, a bitter smile on her face. "Have you got a minute?"

She nearly turned to leave before he answered, already knowing his answer. "Sure. Just killing time, anyway." He shrugged and a smile pulled his mandibles away from his face. Her heart stuttered and she allowed herself a moment to play the sentence over in her mind again. He was willing to talk. The look on his face told her he had noticed her reaction. He hung his head slightly as if he knew he had been treating her badly. "I wanted to thank you again for your help with Sidonis. Whatever happens with the Collectors or the Reapers or whoever else comes after us, I know you'll get the job done."

Her heart raced as she smiled. "I couldn't do this without you, Garrus."

"Sure you could," he chuckled. "Not as stylishly, of course." She snorted and moved to make herself comfortable for the talk she planned on making as long as she could. She'd missed her friend lately and he seemed to be back to himself. She sat down on a crate beside his work station as he turned, his eyes following her as he talked. Was he checking her out? She shuddered, covering it up by leaning forward, her elbows on her knees as she listened to him speak, reveling in his voice. "It's strange going into a suicide mission on a human ship. Your people don't prepare for high risk operations the way Turians do."

"I thought you'd be used to high risk operations on human ships," she teased. "I mean, think about tracking Saren to Ilos."

"Sure, but that was quick. We raced out, landed, blew up some Geth, saved the galaxy." He shuffled around, pacing, but not with tension. It was a easy casual thing. "This time we've got Miranda and Cerberus and that AI, all telling us what we're up against. I think I preferred blind optimism."

Leave it to Garrus to sum up everything so quickly. "Honestly, Garrus, what do you think our chances are?" she asked. It was something that had been eating away at her. It was why she was putting so much effort into helping her people all get some closure and turning them into a team. She was worried.

"Honestly?" he shrugged. "The Collectors killed you once and all they did is piss you off." he chuckled again. "I can't imagine they'll stop you this time, but an unmapped area, advanced technology and the Collectors. We're going to lose people, no way around that." He paused and hung his head. "Not a happy analysis, I know. Don't worry, I won't spread it around. And I'm with you, regardless."

His blind loyalty to her sometimes shocked her. She was just one person, but if Garrus argued, she knew she was really doing something wrong. He never questioned her orders. "Do you ever regret leaving C-Sec?" she asked, wondering what he was doing with her. She was almost guaranteed to lead him to his death. He had even called this a suicide mission just minutes ago. "Or the Turian military?"

"Not for a minute." He shook his head and stepped closer to her. "When it comes down to it Shepard, I don't think I'm a very good Turian. When a good Turian hears a bad order, he follows it." That had been almost one of the first things he had said to her after he'd decided to follow her on the SR1. He'd meant it as a joke then, but now it was crucial in his explanation. "He might complain, but he knows his place. I just don't see the point in staying quiet and polite. Not when the galaxy is at stake."

She took in his words, knowing he was right. She decided she was going to change the subject so she didn't have to think about it anymore. She had just gotten her friend back and she wanted a more pleasant topic to discuss with him. "So, how _do_ Turian crews get ready for high risk missions?"

"With violence, usually," he smirked, taking an at ease stance very near her. "Turian ships have more operational discipline than your Alliance, but fewer personal restrictions. Our Commanders run us tight and they know we need to blow off steam. Turian ships have training rooms for exercise, combat sims, even full contact sparring. Whatever lets people work off stress." he shrugged again.

She drew her head back in curiosity. "You mean Turian ships have crew men fighting each other before a mission?" That was the strangest thing she'd ever heard.

"It's supervised of course," he said, the 'duh' behind his tone. "Nobody's going to risk an injury that interferes with the mission, and it's a good way to settle grudges amicably." he paused, his eyes roving over her again before he grinned and said, "I remember right before one mission. We were about to hit a Batarian Pirate Squad, very risky. This recon scout and I had been at each other's throats. Nerves, mostly. She suggested we settle it in the ring." His subharmonics began to make the purring sound she recognized from him teasing her.

"I assume you took her down gently?" she asked, wondering what the teasing was for.

"Actually," he grinned. "She and I were the top ranked hand to hand specialists on the ship. I had reach, but she had flexibility. It was _brutal_. After 9 rounds, the judge called it a draw. There were a lot of unhappy betters in the training room. We uh, ended up holding a tie breaker in her quarters." He turned from his pacing to look her over again. "I had reach, but she had flexibility. More than one way to work off stress."

He dropped the bomb on her and her heart skipped. What had started off as a friendly conversation had turned into a really suggestive situation. She knew he had learned to read her and she was pretty good at reading him, but she was not sure where this had come from. Was it interest, or was he simply bragging? The way he was looking at her and the purring in his chest made her feel nervous. She was in uncharted territory, but her own feelings toward him had gotten very complicated as of late and she was willing to dip her toes in the pool if he was going to open it up for her. She shook her head and smirked. Putting her best suggestive voice into action she said, "It sounds like you're carrying some tension." She pushed up from her seat and approached him, her hands shaking in spite of the confidence in her voice and the way she moved. "Maybe I could help you get rid of it." She crossed her arms and cocked her hips to the side, grinning as she used her own eyes to sweep over all 6'8" of him standing in front of her.

"I uh... didn't think you'd feel like sparring, Commander." he said, his previous swagger melting away to leave a nervous look on his face. She couldn't help but find it adorable. And had he just called her Commander? Had she taken his meaning all wrong?

She refused to back down. She needed to know one way or another if what she was feeling could ever be reciprocated. She shook her head, dropping the stance she had taken for a more casual one, and offering a short gentle snort, showing she was finding his reaction a good thing. "What if we skipped right to the tie breaker?" She moved past him, her voice still suggestive, and leaned on his favorite console. "We could test your reach... and my flexibility."

God help him if he didn't start to stutter. "Oh, I didn't... hmm," Her heart was still racing as he took in her stance and he identified the tone in her voice. He seemed to gather himself, and flashed her his own suggestive grin. "I never knew you had a weakness for men with scars." She simply grinned in return. "Well, why the hell not. There's nobody in this galaxy I respect more than you and... if we can figure out a way to make it work... then, yeah, definitely." His voice had gone deep and husky as he worked out what he was saying and she had never felt more attracted to him. She knew they couldn't just jump into this thing. She decided a little teasing was in order. She pushed away from the console and strolled past him without a word, sparing a short glance back as the purring in his chest threatened to stop her in her tracks. He allowed her to pass, adding another soft suggestive growl to his voice as she closed the door behind her.

When she was far enough from the main battery, she took a deep breath to stave off her panic attack. What had just happened? Garrus had never shown signs of wanting her for anything other than a friend. He had agreed to her proposition so quickly that she was convinced that she had been wrong in her assumption. Perhaps she was not as good at reading him as she thought.

* * *

 

Garrus stood in the doorway of the main battery, his mouth slightly agape as he stared at the door that Shepard had just closed behind her. What had just happened? He had been hoping for this outcome when he'd told her the story about his time with the recon scout, but never in his wildest dreams had he thought it would actually happen. He was thankful that she had left him alone to think before trying to jump him because he realized that he had stepped into this without having a clue what he was doing. Shepard was a different species. One he really had no idea how to romance. That he had gotten this far with her and she had understood his flirtations was testament to their ability to read each other. He had smelled her distinct Cinnamon pheromones almost as soon as she'd come into the room. There was no mistaking it this time. She was attracted to him. He'd been scenting it on and off while they were together, but he had been trying to write it off. She had never expressed an interest, even going so far as to call him ugly, but had she been teasing? It was infuriating to not know exactly what she was thinking. He shook off the flutter that came to his stomach as he thought about her. He needed a plan.

* * *

 

Shepard was not getting much sleep. She laid on her back, staring defiantly up at the stars as they whizzed by just above her head. She could not stop repeating the conversation in her head that had set her down the path of sex with her best friend. She was panicking now. She had no idea how to go about having a relationship with a Turian. She threw the blanket off of her and stood up to pace. She was terrified that she would do something to screw this up. Taking a deep breath after some time, she went and sat down in her desk chair. She bit her lip and her fingers hovered over the interface. She had no idea how to start. Swallowing her heart, she typed ' _Turian anatomy_ '. She needed a brush up from her high school days when she'd barely paid attention in Biology class. The links she followed were very informative. She read as much as she could, learning about how the Turian body functioned and noted the differences from human males that she was likely to come across.

As informative as this was, it told her nothing about how to actually go about doing the deed. She sighed in frustration. If they were going to do this, she wanted to know what to do to please him, not simply what he looked like under his armor. She was emotionally invested, as much as she hated to admit it, and if something went wrong, she didn't want to think about what might happen. This wasn't some one night fling for her. She had feelings for the bastard Turian and dammit, she wanted to make him happy, not scare him off.

* * *

 

Shepard was glad for the distraction when they landed on Ilium. She and Garrus had tiptoed around the elephant in the room for a week, doing their best to act casual around each other for the benefit of the others, but she couldn't help but exchange flirtatious glances with him when nobody was watching. She'd avoided being alone with him until she figured out what to do.

Ilium was a beautiful city. The market they traveled through glittered and bustled with life. Buyers and sellers shouted as they worked out deals and Shepard couldn't help but be impressed. This place even outshone the Citadel. Garrus was less impressed as he walked close by her side and talked about all of the shady dealings going on under the facade. "Peel back the layers and you're no safer here than on Omega." His words were negative, but his voice was so damn attractive. She smiled as he hovered beside her. "Shepard, you're really going to need to stop doing that." he rumbled, slight distress in his voice.

"What?" she asked, not realizing she had been doing anything.

"Smelling so damn good," he whispered in her ear where Miranda couldn't hear.

She snorted. "I can't help how I smell, Big Guy," she whispered just as conspiratorially.

"Well then I'm going to need to stand downwind until your pheromones calm down. You're killing me," his voice was teasing as he stepped away from her and moved to flank her left instead of her right.

She chuckled and hit his chest playfully with the back of her hand. "You never complained when I was crushing on Kaidan," she teased.

"Yes, hmm... well then it wasn't directed at me. It smells... different." He adjusted his shoulders and rotated his head to shake off his discomfort in the public setting.

She had to admit, talking like this with him, with Miranda so near, was kind of a turn on. She stepped away from him to give him some space and herself a chance to calm her racing heart as they walked through the market to the office where the concierge had told them that Liara had herself set up. She was looking forward to seeing her old friend.

When she passed by the secretary, she ignored the woman calling out to her as she pushed open the door. There was no mistaking her young friend as she stopped to take in the office. Even from behind, she would know Liara anywhere. There was an angry looking human on a vid screen behind a desk. Liara was dropping a pretty serious threat on him in her unmistakable soft voice. "Either you pay me, or I flay you alive... with my mind." With that she ended the call, the vid screen shutting off. With a small sigh, Liara turned to see who had entered her office. "Shepard!" Her voice was full of shock, but not as much as most others. She had known Shepard was alive, had even paid the Normandy's docking fees, but seeing was believing. "Nyxeris, hold my calls!" She grabbed Shepard up in a gentle hug. Shepard was wary, tensing before relaxing into the embrace. The last hug she'd received from one of her former friends had ended in disaster. She heard Garrus hum his support and she pulled away from Liara. "Shepard," Liara said again, savoring the taste of her name again. After looking her over and glancing to Garrus as well, Liara moved to stand behind her desk. "My sources said you were alive, but I never believed... It's very good to see you."

"It's good to see you too, Liara," Shepard smiled widely as Liara seemed to accept her as she was, unlike Kaidan. "How are you doing?"

"I'm doing well. I've been working as an information broker," she replied, turning away as her cheeks flushed purple. "It's paid the bills since you... Well, for the past two years. And now, you're back, gunning for the Collectors with Cerberus."

"If you know that, then you know I could use your help," Shepard offered, taking a seat in front of Laira's desk as the Asari sat behind it.

"I can't Shepard," she said, absolute regret in her voice. "I'm sorry. I have commitments here. Things I need to take care of."

"What kind of things do you need to take care of? Are you in trouble?" Shepard asked, her built in need to help the people she cared about, worming out of its shell.

"No, no trouble, but it's been a long two years. I had things to do while you were gone. I have debts to repay," she paused giving Shepard another small smile. "Listen, if you want to help, I need someone with hacking expertise, someone I can trust." Shepard sat back in her chair crossing one ankle over her knee and grinning. That she could handle. "If you could disable security at key points around Illium, you could get me information I need. That would help me a great deal."

"If it will help you, I'll take care of it." Shepard agreed without a moment's hesitation.

"When you hack one, a server will open somewhere nearby for a short time. You can download data from there, if you hurry. Thank you, Shepard. This may help me pay a great debt." Liara still looked overburdened, but Shepard would help, maybe that would open up Liara and she could get more information later.

A short conversation later, where Shepard gleaned some information about her two dossier targets, she was leaving the office to find the terminals Liara had mentioned. "Our Asari is all grown up and making some pretty serious threats," Garrus mused as they moved through the market.

Shepard stopped to check out some armor upgrades and nodded her agreement. "I think she is in something deeper than she's letting on."

Garrus' response was interrupted when another Asari approached her. "You're Commander Shepard. I saw your... I guess you could say your aura. I'd recognize you anywhere." The woman glanced around to be sure no one was listening and then continued. "I was asked to give you a message if I saw you. It's from a friend you made on Noveria."

Shepard frowned and crossed her arms. She hadn't made many friends on Noveria. "I met a lot of people in Noveria. Could you be more specific?"

"I believe the message itself should make it clear." The woman approached so she was inches from Shepard. Shepard's fingers twitched over her pistol as her personal space was invaded. The Asari's eyes blinked and when they opened, they were pure white. "Shepard. We hide. We burrow, we build, but we know that you seek those who soured the songs of our mothers and when the time comes, our voice will join with yours, and our crescendo will burn the darkness clean. Thank you, Shepard. The Rachni will sing again, because of you."

"I'm glad to hear that you're rebuilding," Shepard said, some of her tension easing. "Are you somewhere close by?"

The Asari stepped back and her eyes returned to normal. "The Rachni Queen is not here. That message is one of many memories I carry from her. I encountered her on an uncharted world. She saved my life. More than that, she gave me a purpose. They are an amazing people, Shepard. The galaxy owes you a great debt for giving them a second chance."

"If you can pass a message back, tell her that I'm watching. Don't make me regret setting her free." Shepard said, making it clear she was glad that the Queen was so far, keeping her word.

"You won't. She seeks only peace. Be well, Commander Shepard. You will not see me again." Just as quickly as she'd approached, the Asari disappeared into the crowd.

"Gee, Shepard. You sure do attract the nicest folks," Garrus quipped as she regained her comfort at having her space back.

"Don't remind me," she shuddered.

* * *

 

During her time on Illium, she ran into a few more familiar faces, including Gianna Parasini, Conrad Vernor, and Shiala, each with a conundrum she felt compelled to help with, as she made her way to the Eternity Bar to meet up with a contact of Miranda's. Her self proclaimed 'second' had come to her with a very personal matter and Shepard was determined to break the walls down around Miranda by helping her with the issue with her father and sister. Her father had somehow tracked down the sister she'd hidden after escaping him years ago. Her genetic 'twin' was a young girl of 19 that her father had grown from her cells when she was a teenager. The resemblance was uncanny, but Oriana held none of the modifications that Miranda had been subjected to growing up, making them anything but identical. The mission turned into a tear jerker as Miranda was forced to watch as a merc coldheartedly shot an old friend of hers who had gotten involved in the mess. Miranda and the rest made short work of the mercs and Miranda was able to speak with her sister and introduce herself after everything was handled. She returned to them with tears in her eyes. Shepard sympathetically allowed her to return to the ship, asking her to send Tali out to join them.

The Quarian joined them, the evening sun bouncing off her helmet as she practically skipped over to them. "Most Quarian's are not allowed on Illium," she said, awe in her voice as she took in the sights.

Shepard finished up hacking the last security terminal as Tali went to investigate a souvenir shop nearby. Once the download finished, Liara contacted Shepard over her comm. "Shepard, it's Liara. Come see me when you get a chance."

It didn't sound urgent, so Shepard gathered Tali up from her sightseeing and went to meet up with the woman who supposedly had information about the assassin on her dossier list. The window to get to him was rapidly closing. Thankful she hadn't waited, Shepard allowed the contact to drive her and her team to Dantius Towers where Thane Krios was apparently heading to kill Nassana Dantius. The name sounded familiar to Shepard, but she didn't recognize the woman until she was standing in front of her. She had been on the Citadel the first time Shepard had been there and she had attempted to get Shepard to kill her sister for her. No wonder an assassin was after her. She was a terrible woman.

They had fought their way all of the way up the tower to get where they were, through wave upon wave of Nassana's hired goons and mechs, rescuing the Salarian night crew that was trapped in the line of fire. Shepard was in no mood for games. She was tired. While Nassana blamed her for being the one there to kill her, a noise sounded above their heads. Shepard grinned, realizing that this was the reason they had not yet run into the assassin. He was moving through the ventilation system. Shepard watched as a dark figure dropped from a grate behind Nassana's desk, snapped the neck of one guard, throat punched the next, shot the third and stuck his pistol in Nassana's gut, pulling the trigger all within about 4 seconds. Shepard was impressed. Thane gently laid Nassana's body back on her desk and proceeded to ignore both Tali and Garrus who had their weapons out, pointed at him. "Impressive, You certainly know how to make an entrance," Garrus commented.

Still, the Drell said nothing. He simply placed his hands together as if he were praying, his head hung low. Shepard stepped forward and Garrus rumbled in his chest. "I was hoping to talk to you," she said.

"I apologize," the Drell finally said in a ragged voice. "but prayers for the wicked must not be forsaken."

"She certainly was wicked," Shepard agreed as the Drell bowed his head again.

His skin reminded her of a snake's in texture. She could not tell in the lighting of the room exactly what color dominated his features. Drell were a rare species to come across and she didn't know much about them outside of her schooling. He glanced up at her, his black eyes blinking twice. One layer vertically, followed by the second layer horizontally. It was strange to see on such a human face. "Not for her, for me." He corrected her assumption. "The measure of an individual can be difficult to discern by actions alone." He stalked around the desk, dragging his fingers along the top. Shepard noticed that his ring and middle finger on both hands were fused together. Another interesting tidbit to remember about Drell anatomy. "Take you for instance. All of this destruction, chaos. I was curious to see how far you'd go to find me. Well," he stopped in front of the desk, his hands clasped behind his back. "Here I am."

"How did you know I was coming at all?" Shepard asked, curious about the way the Drell was studying each of them like he was finding their weak spots and assessing how quickly he could take them down if they became a problem.

He moved away from the desk and toward Shepard, but he did not stop in front of her. "I didn't. Not until you marched in the front door and started shooting." He paused behind her, in front of Garrus, challenging him with his calm demeanor, but still speaking to Shepard. "Nassana had become paranoid. You saw the strength of her guard force. She believed one of her sisters would kill her. _You_ were a valuable distraction." He glanced over his shoulder to address Shepard directly.

"Let's cut to the chase," Shepard said, still feeling the fatigue from the rest of the day. "I need you for a mission."

"Indeed?" Thane seemed interested.

"You're familiar with the Collectors?" Shepard asked, as he turned to face her again, his curiosity piqued.

"By reputation," he confirmed, circling to stand back in front of the desk. Shepard breathed a sigh of relief as she worked out in her head that he had been planning on taking down Garrus first if it came down to a fight, which was why he had placed himself where he had.

"They're abducting entire human colonies. Freedom's Progress was their handiwork."

Thane, still facing his back to her hung his head. "I see."

"We're going after them," Shepard prompted.

Thane spun the top of his body quickly to face her. "Attacking the Collectors would require passing through the Omega 4 relay. No ship has ever returned from doing so."

"They told me it was impossible to get to Ilos, too," Shepard said with a casual nod.

"A fair point. You've built a career on performing the impossible." Shepard stepped up to stand beside him, allowing him to straighten his body and her to watch his face as he pondered. Garrus was rumbling a warning in his chest, still unsure of the assassin's intentions. She shot him a small reassuring smile before Thane continued softly, "This _was_ to be my last job. I'm dying." A short pause gave her a moment to absorb the information. "Low survival odds don't concern me. The abduction of your colonists does."

"I hadn't heard that," Shepard said, lacing her voice with sympathy. The Illusive Man had fumbled this bit of information. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Giving me this opportunity is enough. The Universe is a dark place. I'm trying to make it brighter before I die. Many innocent's died today. I wasn't fast enough and they suffered. I must atone for that. I will work for you Shepard, no charge." He reached his hand out and Shepard took it with a smile, shaking it gently.

* * *

 

They returned to the Normandy where EDI helpfully informed Thane of the most arid part of the ship for him to set himself up a bunk. Shepard took him in in the correct lighting. His skin was mostly green and he indeed had colored markings, mostly black, like a snake might. He had small crests lining his cheeks where his skin flared out. From there down to below his chin, the texture of his skin was different. No longer so much scaly as it was ridged. The color contrast blended nicely into red throughout the patch. "He seems quite civil," EDI commented before her avatar blinked out of existence. Shepard smiled and assured Jacob that he should give Thane the benefit of the doubt.

Once that was taken care of, she decided to head down to visit Garrus. They needed to have a talk about their situation. It had not been officially addressed since the initial suggestion and if she wanted to avoid pressing his buttons at a bad time, she needed to know what she was doing. She let herself into the main battery, leaving the door open behind her, letting him know she was there for conversation only. "Hey, Shepard," he said, turning to look at her from where he was cleaning his armor.

"Hey, Big Guy, you got a minute?" He glanced at the door, taking her meaning and nodded he understood before closing it himself.

"Yeah, I've been thinking about what we talked about. Blowing off steam, easing tension." He sounded nervous and she was hoping he hadn't changed his mind. Their earlier private conversation on Illium had not suggested that was the case. She kept quiet and allowed him to finish. "I've never considered cross-species intercourse, and damn, saying it that way doesn't help. Now I feel dirty and clinical." He grinned sheepishly at his own awkwardness. He started pacing and rambling. "Are we crazy to even be thinking about this? I'm not... Look, Shepard, I know you can find something a little closer to home."

She scoffed, gently grabbing his arm to stop the pacing. "I don't want something closer to home. I want you. I want someone I can trust."

He glanced down at her hand and seemed to gather himself to smile at her. "I... can do that. I'll find some music... and do some research to figure out how this thing should work." She loved that his mind went exactly where hers had. He chuckled a bit, taking her hand from his arm and holding it in his. "It'll either be a night to treasure, or a horrible inter-species awkwardness thing. In which case, fighting the Collectors will be a welcome distraction. So, you know, a win either way."

She wanted to laugh, but this was a serious conversation in spite of his joking words. She pulled her hand slowly from his and her next words hurt as she forced them out of her mouth, placing that same hand back on his shoulder. It was trembling with the fear of rejection. "You know, Garrus, if you're not comfortable with this, it's okay. I'm not trying to pressure you."

"Shepard, you're about the only friend I've got left in this screwed-up galaxy. I'm not going to pretend I've got a fetish for humans, but this isn't about that. This is about _us_. You never have to worry about making me uncomfortable. Nervous, yes... but never uncomfortable."

His words were exactly what she needed to hear. Her sure attitude came back and she crossed her arms flirtatiously. "So, when should I book the room?" She tossed him a playful wink, letting him know that she was not quite ready herself, but she was definitely willing in spite of her own nerves.

"I'd wait if you're okay with it," he said with a short chuckle. "Disrupt the crew as little as possible..." he stepped as close to her as he could get without touching. "and take that last chance to find some calm just before the storm." Then he stepped back with a flirtatious grin of his own. He was oozing swagger and she found herself trying to calm a racing heart. "You know me. I always like to savor the last shot before popping the heat sink." She snorted at his innuendo and shook her head, her arms still crossed in front of her chest and took the opportunity to take a step back before he could tell that not only was it funny, but it really worked for her. He thought about it after her reaction and then he chuckled himself. "Wait, that metaphor just went somewhere horrible."

"I'll let you get back to work," she said, backing up into the door and indicating his armor where he'd left it beside his cot. Her breathing was heavy and she fled before she threw too many pheromones at him.

"Right," he said as she left. "'cause I'm in a great place to optimize firing algorithms right now."

She knew the feeling as the door closed in her face. There was no way she was going to be able to do her rounds tonight with the places her mind was taking her. She decided to try another approach to her research. She sheepishly went to knock on Dr. Chakwas' door, but chickened out at the last minute. That would be far too much like talking to her mother. She took the elevator to the CIC deck and headed for the tech lab where Mordin was always awake. "Ah, Shepard. How can I help?" He was busily pecking away at his console, but she knew he was listening.

"I kind of have an awkward question and you were the only one who might be able to help," she wrung her hands together, dreading the conversation, but realizing he might be the only one who could give her accurate information without resorting to the extranet and the porn she was likely to find if she looked up 'Human/Turian intercourse'.

He looked up from his work and quickly analyzed her behavior as he was known to do. Before she could ask any questions, he grinned and said, "Sexual activity normal stress release for Humans and Turians. Still recommend caution. Warn of chafing." He came around his lab table to stand in front of her, pulling up his omnitool and typing frantically, still talking. "Hormones. Regardless, come see me later. May need analgesic. Chafing," he said again raising his eyebrows to drive his point home.

She didn't even want to know how he had figured out what she wanted, but Mordin was a very observant person, so she shrugged off her awkwardness and said, "So, do you have a recommendation as a doctor?"

"Turians based on dextro-amino acids. Human ingestion of tissue could provoke allergic reactions. Anaphylactic shock possible. So don't, ah, ingest." He cleared his throat at the suggestion as she felt her face redden. "Also forwarding advice booklet to your quarters. Valuable diagrams, positions comfortable for both species, erogenous zone overviews." He closed his omnitool and a smile spread across his face. "Can supply oils or ointments to reduce discomfort. Gave EDI electronic relationship aid demonstration vids to use as necessary."

As he rambled, she realized that somewhere around oils he had begun to lighten the mood by joking with her. "Wait a minute, Mordin. You're just yanking me around aren't you?" she said hopefully. He really hadn't involved EDI, had he?

"Shocking suggestion!" he said backing away with a look of false horror on his face. "Doctor-patient confidentiality a sacred trust. Would never dream of... mockery." The smile on his face was genuine after a short chuckle. "Enjoy yourself while possible, Shepard. Will be here, studying cell reproduction. Much simpler. Less alcohol and mood music required." he patted her shoulder, lending her confidence and a friendly ear should she need it.

She sheepishly made her way to her cabin and saw that Mordin had indeed forwarded her some information, the header a winky face emoticon. She was grateful to him for understanding as she pulled up some of the diagrams and started on her research.

* * *

 

It was short work finding Samara, but getting her to agree to come along was a different story. Shepard was tasked with finding information on a ship that the Eclipse sisters had used to smuggle a dangerous criminal off world while Samara sat at the police station, in custody to 'keep the peace'. Shepard, Garrus and Tali had to work fast. They had 24 hours to get the information from behind Eclipse borders and return to Samara before her Justicar code forced her to kill her captors and continue on her quest to find her prey.

After beating a key card out of a smuggler Volus named Pitne For, Shepard stood impatiently in the elevator that would take them to the warehouse where the Eclipse apparently set up their base. She was slightly concerned, because he had informed them that the shipment of smuggled red sand he had gotten for the mercs was tainted with a tissue eating chemical that would boost your biotic powers in small doses, but would kill you if your body was overexposed to the toxin. He had not informed them how much of the stuff the mercs had, but from the sound of it, it was a lot.

As soon as the elevator opened up, they were set upon by a mech that had been set to keep watch. "So much for sneaking in," she grumbled as they shot the mech. She took cover around a wall as they opened the main door into the base. The Eclipse were ready for them, just as she suspected. Before she could even peer in around the doorway, a warp field came flying toward her. She threw up her own barrier to deplete the force of the field as it hit her. "Dammit," she cursed, feeling pinned down already. She quickly glanced around the door and spotted each target with her visor then backed into cover again. Checking her pistol, she nodded to the others and slid around the door into another short bit of cover just inside the door. She ducked just as a singularity came toward her. It struck something behind her and she reached up over her cover to take a shot at the Asari who kept pegging biotics at her. A clang behind her said she had taken a good shot as the Asari fell dead and her singularity lost power. Shepard paid little attention as she stayed in her cover and took out the rest of the Eclipse that scurried around the area. When Garrus gave the all clear, she stood and attempted to shut off her barrier before they moved on. She frowned as her fingers tingled and the barrier wouldn't go down. "The hell?" she said, shaking her hands. She glanced around and noticed a cloud of red powder floating around where the singularity had apparently dropped one of the containers with the tainted red sand and cracked the seal.

"Shepard, get out of the cloud," Garrus called, noticing her situation.

She nodded and jogged toward him. "Shit, we literally walked in the door and what's the first thing that happens?"

"You get caught in a potentially deadly cloud of red sand?" he said with a smirk.

"Bingo! Big Guy gets a prize," she said as Tali chuckled. "Come on, lets try to avoid getting near any more. I should be fine as long as I don't inhale any more."

They fought through the base, running into an Eclipse who tried to lie and pretend she was innocent. It almost worked until she pulled a shotgun and dinged Shepard's shields. All three of them took a shot at her at the same time and she wasn't so lucky to have a shield protecting her.

The red sand was almost impossible to avoid. The crates were everywhere and the Eclipse had apparently figured out how to use it as a weapon, exploding the crates close to Shepard as much as they could. Her souped up biotics were coming in handy, her shockwave nearly ripping them in half as it skipped along the battle field, and her warp was deadly, but she was starting to feel the fatigue. Her whole body insisted on maintaining the eerie glow of biotics even when they weren't in use, and her head was buzzing along with her tingling hands. "Shepard, you really don't look so good," Garrus warned, approaching her and landing a hand on her upper arm as she tried to brush it off.

"We need the name of that ship, Big Guy," she said sending a tight lipped smile in his direction, appreciating the concern.

He glanced around to see that Tali wasn't watching and he pulled her closer to him so he could whisper in her ear. "If you die before we get a chance to pop our heat sink, I shall be very put out."

She chuckled as his tone and the usual rumble of his voice nearly made her swoon in her weakened state. "If you're trying to make me faint so you can carry me out of here, mission almost accomplished," she joked, gently pulling away from him to compose herself before Tali finished hacking the nearby info console to pull up an audio file that pegged the Asari that had taken the pot shot at Shepard as responsible for the murder of Pitne For's partner.

"It's a good thing we took her out," Tali mused, completely oblivious to what had just gone on behind her.

"Sounds like she was just getting started," Shepard commented, taking a copy of the audio as evidence for the police. They fought through some more Eclipse, pushing further into the base. After nearly ripping a gunship in half with her bare hands, Shepard dipped her head backwards as her nose started to bleed. "I'm fine," she said holding up a hand as she pinched the bridge of her nose and Tali and Garrus came running up to her.

"Clearly," Garrus said holding her head back with a finger under her chin as Tali pulled a tissue from one of her many pouches.

"I use them to wipe dirt off my helmet," Tali said with a shrug as they both frowned, wondering why Tali of all people would need to carry tissues around.

Once Shepard had contained her bloody nose, she pushed forward, even as the other two protested. "At least put on your helmet," Garrus said before he realized she didn't have it clipped to her belt.

"We're on Illium," she shrugged, gesturing to her visor. "I didn't think I'd need my full enviro suit."

"We are going to have a talk about your combat preparedness when we get home, young lady," he said.

"I'm older than you," she complained.

"Yet I remembered my helmet," he teased. Her visor told her that he was teasing her, but his heart rate was elevated. He was concerned about her.

They passed into another small set of offices where a data pad lent proof to Pitne For's involvement in the tainted red sand. Shepard pocketed the data pad and they moved on. Passing through a few hallways that were blissfully empty, Shepard felt a bit of relief from her tingling fingers as her implants fought off the toxins in her blood stream. At the end of a long white hallway, they ran into a Volus who was standing alone, wavering on his feet. The poor guy turned around when he heard them approaching and bumped right into Shepard's legs. He stumbled backwards as she crossed her arms in annoyance. She was really in no mood to waste time with this. After he caught his balance, he said, "I am a biotic god! I think things and they happen! Fear me, lesser creatures, for I am biotics made flesh!"

"Wow you're on the good stuff I see. Just stay back and I won't shoot you," Shepard threatened as the Volus flared blue at odd intervals.

"You will regret your scandalous words! I am a great wind that will sweep all before me like a... a great wind. A great biotic wind! Yes, the Asari injecting so many drugs into me was terrifying, but then I began to smell my greatness!" Shepard pinched the bridge of her nose as her headache flared and the Volus continued. "They may laugh when I fall over, but they don't know what I know in my head... That I know that I am amazingly powerful. Fear me!" he wandered over toward Garrus and shook his fist as he shouted the last two words.

The three foot nothing Volus shaking his fist at Garrus as the Turian loomed over him with his arms crossed struck Shepard as extremely hilarious. She stifled her laughter, snorting as Garrus gave her a wide eyed, 'is this guy serious?' look. She felt her nose start up again and pulled the already used tissue from her pocket and stifled it. "Are you part of Pitne For's trade group?" she asked.

"When I was mortal, I worked for Pitne. Poor soul is probably terrified that I have not returned," the Volus admitted.

Garrus watched her staunch her bloody nose as he said, "He hasn't reported your disappearance. Probably so his departure won't get delayed."

"Bah!" the Volus waved his arm in dismissal. "I will wreak a just revenge upon his people! But first... the leader of these mercenaries is in the next room." He turned and moved toward the door exposing his back to her. "I shall toss Wasea about like a rag doll."

"Shepard, this guy couldn't tie his bootlaces, much less fight..." Garrus said as she stared at the Volus' exposed back.

"I will tear her apart! My biotics are unstoppable!" He turned back around to face her.

She knelt in front of him so she was eye level. "Wasea will tear _you_ apart. Take a nap, you'll feel better." She knew that was true, because that was all she wanted to do at the moment.

"Are you mad?! I'm unstoppable. Feasting on her biotic rich blood will be the last step in my ascension to godhood!" He turned again to face the door and Shepard returned to her feet sighing. She had had enough. She gently shoved the Volus in his vulnerable back. He toppled and fell. As he got back up, he stuttered. "But... great wind! Biotic god! I'm... I... what was I saying? I'm... tired... You... may be right. Yes, I'm tired.... I'll nap. Destroy the universe later..." he stumbled off, continuing to mumble to himself.

Garrus grinned and said, "So much for godhood."

Shepard shook her head and continued through the door where he had said that this Wasea character was waiting. When they entered, the Asari in question spoke calmly to them at first. "Everything's gone to hell since we smuggled that filthy creature off-world. First a Justicar shows up, now you." She tossed a datapad on the desk in front of her, pacing. Her biotics flared and she shouted as she lifted a canister of the tainted red sand into the air and threw it at Shepard. "At least I can take pleasure in turning your head into a pulpy mass!"

Shepard cooly stepped to the side and the container flew past her and smashed into the wall behind her, filling the air with a fresh cloud of the damned powder. "I am really gonna feel this tonight," she grumbled as she pulled her pistol and ran for cover as far from the cloud of dust as possible without exposing herself to Wasea's biotic attacks. Shepard took out some of the other troops that filed in as Garrus and Tali distracted the leader and wore down her barrier. The whole room was starting to fill up with the awful sand as boitic attacks flew from all angles, carelessly slamming into the crates strewn about the whole warehouse. Shepard choked as the air thickened around her. She moved out of her cover cautiously trying to find a place where each breath didn't fill her lungs with the drug.

Suddenly, she was grabbed by her arm and Garrus pulled her down into his cover beside him. "This won't fit right, but it may save your life," he said as he stuffed his own helmet down over her head and activated the air seal.

She gasped in a clear breath of filtered air, but she couldn't see. The helmet was shaped for a Turian head, not hers. She caught her breath slowly as the battle raged around her. "Point me at the enemy," she shouted when she was able.

Garrus carefully gave her direction by telling her which direction to throw her biotics. The shockwaves decimated the remainder of Wasea's mercenaries and the leader herself fell to a sniper shot from Garrus. "You okay, Shepard?" Garrus asked, knocking on the helmet.

"Peachy," she grumbled. "It smells like Turian in here."

"Hmm, enjoy the pheromones. Maybe you'll know how I feel," he joked, helping her to her feet.

He brushed sand from her armor that she couldn't see and she tilted her head down so she could see a little bit through the eye window that was way too high up. "Okay, let's get that data pad and see if it has the name of that damn ship so we can get the hell out of here." She took a step and tripped over what she could only assume was a body. Garrus grabbed her by the back of her armor and steadied her as he and Tali laughed. "I swear if you two ever breathe a word of this to anyone else, I'm returning all of the dextro friendly rations on the ship."

"I would never dream of telling anyone," Tali said as Shepard heard the distinct clicking of an omnitool taking a photo.

"Then what was that?" she asked turning in the general direction of Tali's voice.

"For my personal collection," Tali giggled.

"You two suck," Shepard groaned, shuffling forward so she didn't trip again.

Garrus was at her side, taking her arm in an instant. "But you still like us," he chuckled, guiding her toward the desk.

"Tolerate," she corrected. "I tolerate you."

Tali collected the data and Garrus made Shepard walk all of the way to the exit of the warehouse with his helmet on before he deemed it safe for her to remove it. They delivered the data to Samara who took to her knee and swore a biotic oath to follow Shepard's orders in lieu of her own moral code until she was released. Shepard took the oath as seriously as it was given, showing how honored she was by promising that there should never be a problem between them because she tried to live up to her own moral code. With that out of the way, Shepard gave the other information they had collected to the officer in charge and then they left.

 

Shepard had intended to visit Liara that same day after wrapping up the business with Samara, but that was before she had been poisoned. After Dr. Chakwas had a look at her and released her, she went to the mess hall to grab a bite to eat. Rupert had made some sort of Asari delicacy that everyone was raving over. She gave it a try and found it to be delicious. Every one was out of their holes, enjoying the meal together, except for the two newcomers. Thane and Samara were both suspiciously absent. She made a mental note to work them into her rounds as soon as possible. They needed to become a part of the group if they were going to work together. Even Miranda had become less bitchy since the thing with her sister had been cleared up.

When they left Illium, Shepard was going to head to Tuchanka to try and get a bead on what was up with Grunt who had become even more twitchy than usual, as well as look into a possible kidnapping of one of Mordin's old colleagues by a Krogan Clan. Right now, she was content to nurse her fuzzy head and enjoy dinner with her people.

Once everyone cleared out, Shepard stood and took her bowl to the kitchen to rinse it and place it in the dishwasher. She jumped when she heard Thane's gravely two toned voice from right behind her and dropped the bowl. He caught it before it hit the ground and apologized for startling her. "No, no," she said. "I just had my mind elsewhere."

"I did not think to find anyone else still up," he said, placing the bowl in the dishwasher for her.

"How are you settling in?" she asked, curious why he hadn't ventured out to get some food while everyone else was there.

"I am finding it difficult to adjust to such a crowded place. I've spent much of my life alone. The path of an assassin is a lonely one," he shrugged.

"I'm sure," she agreed, brushing her hands together, still feeling the slight tingling from the toxins in her fingers. "Did you ever have family?" she asked.

He offered her a bitter smile. "I was taken for training when I was just 6 years old. I only remember my parents because Drell have perfect memories. It was much later when I formed my own family, but that is a story for another time. You look taxed. Are you feeling well?"

"I should be asking you that. When we met, you said you were dying?"

"Yes," he said with a nod. "You do not need to fear. My disease is not communicable, not even to other Drell. It is called Kepral's syndrome."

"You know, we have a state of the art med bay. Dr. Chakwas is the best if you need to see her for anything..." Shepard threw a thumb over her shoulder toward the med bay in question.

"No, thank you, but it is being tended to. I appreciate the concern, but there is no cure. The best I can do is try to atone for my mistakes and help you to make the galaxy a little bit safer in the time I have left." He said, sounding truly accepting of his fate. "I apologize again for startling you, Commander. Good night." He gave a short bow and disappeared without so much as grabbing a ration bar.

 


	19. Selling Secrets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard helps Liara to hunt down the elusive Shadow Broker.

Shepard felt much better when she woke up in the morning to the sun in the docking bay instead of the great gaping nothingness of space. Not having any other plans for the day she decided to check her mail and then head over to visit Liara one last time before they left for Tuchanka. She saw an email in her inbox from the Illusive Man, easily distinguishable by the big bold letters labeling it an encoded transmission. Such drama for a simple email. She opened it and the title read 'Something your friend Dr. T'Soni may find interesting'. There was an attachment with information on the Shadow Broker. Shepard downloaded the info to a data pad and stuffed it in her hoodie pocket for later. She took the elevator down to the crew deck and grabbed herself a cup of coffee and a granola bar. While she unwrapped the granola, she walked casually to the main battery to see if Garrus wanted to accompany her for a bit of shopping and the visit to see Liara. She knocked and the door came open. He was relaxing on his cot, reading something on a data pad which he quickly shoved under his pillow when he saw it was her.

"Did I catch you researching?" she teased taking a bite of her granola bar and then sipping her coffee.

"Definitely," he said, unashamed. "Part of me still thinks we're crazy for even considering... blowing off steam." He stood and walked over to her. "But I want to try it with you. I want a few moments that are just for us, before we throw ourselves into hell for the good of the galaxy."

"I want that too, Garrus," she agreed nudging his arm with her free hand after she stuffed the granola into the same hand holding her coffee.

"Glad to hear it," he offered her a smile. "I'll continue my... uh... research and figure out how to... you know... okay that sounded bad... Did you want something? Or are you here to make me blush?"

"Both," she grinned. "I'm heading down to the markets to do a little shopping and see Liara again before we take off. Did you wanna come?"

"Are you kidding? I'm right behind you. Are you sure you're feeling up to it?"

"My head has stopped throbbing and my fingers aren't tingling anymore. Do I look blue to you?" She spun around to give him a good look.

He took in the view, humming in his chest in appreciation before glancing back up at her face. "Nope, you're back to the usual pinkish hue." Then he narrowed his eyes and studied her face. "Your freckles are back."

She touched her face. "I hadn't noticed. It must have been the sunburn I got on Haestrom when we picked up Tali."

"The sun does that to your skin?" he asked with curiosity.

"Uh oh, someone needs to bulk up on their human biology lessons," she teased, finishing off her granola and taking another sip of coffee. "I'll be waiting in the mess when you're ready to go, Big Guy."

* * *

 

Shepard meandered around the Illium market, Garrus at her side. He managed to haggle her a deal for some pretty cool armor upgrades by pulling out his charm on an Asari saleswoman who nearly swooned. As they walked away, she nudged his chest with her elbow a teasing grin plastered across her face. "How come you're never that smooth when you're flirting with me?"

"Hmm," he sighed. "Well, I guess you just matter... and uh, I am never quite sure how to compliment a human."

She pouted her lips mockingly, "Aww, you do care. Big softy."

"You realize my skin is fused with metal, right?" he grinned. "There is literally nothing soft about me."

"Oh, ho! Slow down there, Archangel, we're in public!" She laughed turning to walk backwards in front of him.

He frowned for a moment as his translator figured out what exactly he had said to make her laugh. "Oh, Shepard! Dirty!" he said with a chuckle of his own.

"Come on," she said turning and throwing her head over her shoulder to talk. "I think my tank needs some more fish."

They went to the shop where Tali had been browsing the first day they'd been there and after helping the Asari worker to realize that her Krogan boyfriend was really worth all of the poetry he was shouting at her, Shepard was offered a discount. Garrus helped her pick out some more fish and then she fell in love with a little 'space hamster' and threw a bunch of Cerberus credits into the animal and all of its trimmings. Feeling better about herself that she could so frivolously spend the Illusive Man's money, Shepard led Garrus back over to where Liara had her office.

"Shepard! It's good to see you again. " Liara said with a smile, tapping away on her computer behind her desk.

Shepard flopped herself casually down in the chair on the opposite side of the desk. "Was that data I got for you helpful?" she asked, sliding her hands into her hoodie pocket to finger the data pad she still had with the information on the Shadow Broker.

"Yes, thank you," she said.

"What's this all about, Liara? Can't you just talk to me?" Shepard asked, hoping to get something about the new colder side to her friend. She had accepted Shepard, but Liara was not herself.

Liara sighed, ceasing her pecking on the keyboard. "Don't you think I want to, Shepard? This isn't because I don't trust you. This is Illium. Anything I say is probably being recorded." Garrus hummed behind her, the small gesture not only pushing home the comment he had made a few days ago about the security of Illium, but making shivers run down her spine. She threw a short glare coupled with a smile at him, hoping Liara didn't see. With another sigh Liara said. "Do you remember the Shadow Broker? With the data you got me, I may be able to find information caches from his agents."

"Are you on the run from the Shadow Broker?" Shepard asked, sitting forward, her eyes narrowing as she studied her friend. "I can help you."

Liara let out a soft laugh. "Actually, it would be more accurate to say that the Shadow Broker is on the run from me. We crossed paths not long after you died. Since then I have been working to take him down." Liara slapped her hand down on the surface of the desk with passion. "With this data, I'm a step closer."

"You can't come with me because you're after the Shadow Broker? What if I help you find him?" She said it with a sly smile that Liara apparently didn't pick up on.

"I'm sorry, Shepard. The galaxy doesn't work that way. I need to find leads, trace information. I need to work. I can't do that on the Normandy. I wish I could."

This was her chance to get her friend back. If the information that Cerberus had given her would help Liara to find the Shadow Broker, maybe she would be willing to come along. It was selfish, but Shepard had only wanted to find her friends after she'd woken up on that Cerberus Station. Now Liara was struggling, but she wouldn't accept the help. Shepard pulled out the data pad from her pocket and tapped it on her opposite hand, flashing the thing like she was luring in a child with candy. "You see, funny thing. Working with Cerberus has it's perks every now and then. I got an interesting email last night from the Illusive Man." She held up the data pad where Liara's gaze was now focused. "It contains data on where to find the Shadow Broker. Interested?"

Liara perked up, eyes still on the data pad. "Absolutely!" she stood and held her hand out for the bit of tech still in Shepard's possession. "I had no idea... Let me see what you've got!"

Shepard held the data pad out of reach and said, "On one condition."

Liara's eyes narrowed. Shepard had never seen her friend angry before. "You're giving me stipulations?"

"No," she said. "Not a stipulation. A request." she softened her features, trying to get through to Liara. "Let me help you. You shouldn't do this alone."

Liara continued to glare for a moment but then rolled her eyes, nodded, and beckoned her hand for Shepard to give over the pad. Shepard smiled and graciously handed her the information, standing to get closer and get a better look, herself. Garrus continued to listen, not betraying any of what he felt in his expression. Liara hummed as she read over the email. "It looks like a leaked transmission between Shadow Broker operatives. Some hints to a location, and... " Liara paused, her breath coming out in a sigh as a photo of a Drell popped up among the data. "It's about Feron. He's still alive." She smiled, tears shimmering in her eyes.

"Who's Feron?" Shepard asked, wondering what she had missed.

"He was a friend... He helped me recover your body from the Shadow Broker." She admitted.

 _The plot thickens_. "Why did the Shadow Broker want my corpse?" Shepard asked and Garrus grunted his disapproval of the casual conversation about her time being dead. She apologized with a glance and he crossed his arms.

"He was going to sell you to the Collectors, but Feron and I stopped him. Feron sacrificed himself to save me," she explained.

"So, _you_ rescued me? Then how did I end up with Cerberus?" Shepard asked, trying to figure everything out.

"Well," Liara shrugged sheepishly. "They gave me intel to help recover you. They actually put Feron with me in the first place. After I got out, I gave you to them. They said they could bring you back."

Shepard let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding until Liara finished her confession. Her hands were trembling. Liara had been the one to give her to the enemy. They had brought her back. They'd given her a second chance at life. That was all Liara had wanted... to save her friend. Shepard swallowed her racing heart as Garrus began his comforting humming, stepping closer to her, hovering but not touching. "You kept me out of the Collectors' hands. Without you, I couldn't have come back. Thank you." She reached out and touched Liara's forearm.

"I didn't know how you'd feel when Cerberus restored you. If you'd feel betrayed, or..." She glanced down at the Drell's picture again and smiled softly. "They brought you back, and now they're giving me a chance to find Feron. After two years, I hadn't even dreamed..." She set the data pad down beside a frame on her desk, the tears glistening in her eyes again.

"Sounds like you and Feron were close," Shepard said, looking at Garrus, feeling her own fluttering of butterflies that he was still giving her whenever they shared a glance.

"It's funny," Liara said, her tone a bit lighter than it had been. "He betrayed me more than once. He was double dealing for Cerberus, for the Shadow Broker... but in the end, he sacrificed himself for me. I owe him."

After a short pause in which Liara looked thoughtful, Shepard touched her shoulder and said, "Any friend of yours is a friend of mine. What's the next step?"

"I... I don't know. I need to prepare, to think. I'm going home. Use my terminal if you need any local intel." She grabbed up the data pad and the frame sitting beside it and nearly ran for the door.

"Are you okay?" Shepard asked before she could escape.

She stopped and turned. "I've spent two years plotting revenge. Now I have the chance to make it a rescue."

"I'll come by your apartment later. I made you promise you'd let me help," Shepard said crossing her arms.

"Okay, hopefully I'll have a plan by then. Thank you, Shepard." Then she was gone in a flash.

"We need to be very delicate with this, Shepard. The Shadow Broker has agents everywhere," Garrus said, placing his arm around her shoulders.

She was thankful for the small bit of comfort. "That's why I'm taking a squad with me to Liara's apartment. Just to be safe."

"Try to remember your helmet this time, hmm?" he joked.

* * *

 

Shepard, Garrus and Tali arrived at Liara's address in a cab just after the sun had crept below the horizon. Shepard groaned as she saw the police presence outside the building. "Dammit, we haven't even gotten out of the car. Just once the trouble could wait for a few hours..."

"Since when are you that lucky?" Tali asked, climbing out of the back seat.

"Apparently not today. Let's go make sure Liara is okay," she sighed and stepped out of the car.

Just inside, there were investigators crawling all over the small apartment. Shepard was stopped at the door until an Asari in blue armor strolled casually down the stairs and shooed the police from the scene, letting Shepard and her people pass. Shepard looked the woman up and down. Her features were not as traditionally beautiful as Liara's or Aria's, but she was Asari and that in itself was attractive. Her jaw was a bit wider and the facial markings she carried were not as streamlined as Shepard was used to seeing. Shepard stopped a good distance away, suspiciously eyeing her and wondering what gave her the authority to dismiss an entire unit of police officers. "Who are you? Where's Liara?" Shepard crossed her arms.

The Asari threw a husky tone into her voice and said, "Someone tried to kill your friend, Commander Shepard." Shepard was not buying into the act. Not until the woman gave her a name. "Tela Vasir. Special Tactics and Recon."

"A SPECTRE?" Shepard asked, dropping her arms and approaching the Asari.

The woman nodded and grinned. "I heard your status was reinstated. Good."

Vasir appraised Shepard of the situation while Shepard poked around the apartment, trying to find a clue as to where Liara had gone. She obviously hadn't fallen victim to the bullets that had been fired at her. There was no blood or Liara's body. Shepard was loathe to let this strange woman in on her operation, but she obviously wasn't leaving. She followed Shepard as she hunted around the place for a hint. Shepard spotted a photo of the Normandy on Liara's nightstand, but she thought it was strange. She picked it up to study it because why would Liara keep a photo of the SR2 when she'd never even been on board? Almost as soon as she touched it, the picture changed. Vasir saw it immediately before Shepard could cover it up. "It's a Prothean dig site," Shepard said when Vasir questioned her.

Vasir suggested they search the Prothean artifacts that were strewn all over the apartment in display cases. Shepard sighed when she came across a data disk hidden in the base of one of the cases. "What's that?" Vasir said, standing directly behind her.

Shepard grunted, hoping the woman would take the hint about personal space. "I'll try it in her computer." Garrus was growling in response to Shepard's distrust. He and Tali joined them to watch the recording of a call between Liara and one of her contacts. It hinted that she was going to meet the Salarian at the Dracon Trade Centers.

"I know where that is. My car is outside," Vasir said, practically racing Shepard out the door.

"I don't trust her at all," Shepard grumbled to her people before following her out. "Watch yourselves."

The skycar ride was short and tense as Shepard oozed distaste. She kept her arms crossed and her back rigid. Vasir made her more uncomfortable than she'd been around Saren, and she'd _known_ Saren was out to kill her. She was grateful when the car landed and she could escape it's confines. She reached up to close the door and suddenly, there was a loud bang followed by several more. The explosions rocked the entire area and Shepard held out her arms to catch her balance and watched the bottom three floors of the building go up in flames. "Keelah," Tali whispered jogging forward.

"Liara's in there!" Shepard shouted, panic pushing her toward the blaze.

Garrus grabbed her upper arm and shook his head while he scanned the building with his visor to be certain there weren't any more explosions to be triggered. She tugged away from him, but kept her feet firmly planted. "There is another explosive on the third floor, but it is inert," he said. "Emergency communications are disabled, so no help was called, but the sprinklers were activated."

"Dammit!" Shepard cursed. "We need to get in there."

"You start down here, I'll work my way down from the top," Vasir shouted already in her car.

Shepard really wasn't comfortable with letting her out of her sights, but there wasn't time to argue. She pulled her pistol and her and her squad moved toward the building. Aside from some bodies strewn about and a bit of structural damage, the sprinklers had for the most part done their jobs. A few fires still burned in corners where the water hadn't reached, but they didn't seem to be a danger in the overall situation. Shepard tried the elevator, but it was locked on the second floor. She took the long way around, noticing along the way that some of the bodies had not been killed by the explosion, but they had bullet wounds. They weren't alone. She pointed this out to the others and silently made her way toward the offices that Liara had mentioned on the disc. They found the bomb that Garrus' visor had picked up and Tali quickly made sure that it would never explode before they opened the door to the offices. A log showed that Liara had indeed signed in at the place just a few minutes ago. Shepard pushed ahead and as she passed a large glass wall, a noise drew her attention. "Get down!" she shouted as she spotted the flash bang grenade skid across the floor and tap the glass wall. She ducked around the corner and the grenade detonated, taking out the glass and blinding her for a moment. Blinking off the flash of light, she felt her shields getting peppered by assault rifle fire.

She ducked back around the other side of the wall to get out of the line of fire and heard Garrus shouting. "Shepard! You all right?"

"Yeah, I'm good," she said raising her hand up so he could place her on the field. "Who the hell _are_ these guys?"

"Say hello to the Shadow Broker's private army," Vasir chirped over her comm channel.

"Sure thing. I'll introduce them to my pistol," she growled as the assault fire continued.

Moving from one cover to the next to mask where she was, Shepard glanced up and did a quick scan through the falling water from the sprinklers. "There are a lot of them," Tali said from behind a desk.

Shepard nodded, and formulated her take-down plan. Signaling to Tali, she called out to Garrus in as much code as she could think of since she couldn't see him to signal. He managed to understand everything she said, because when she stood up out of cover to throw her singularity, he followed her every instruction to a T.

In spite of the sprinklers constantly raining water down on her, Shepard felt the fight was going well. Her hair was plastered to her face and her visor dripped water in her eyes, but her shots were not landing too far off their marks. "Ugh, I swear, I'm gonna shave my head," she grumbled, wiping the offending hair back and tucking it as best she could behind her ears.

She heard a chirping sound as Garrus came through on her private channel where no one else could hear him. "If you shave that hair off, I'm disowning you," he threatened.

"Oh, I see," she said as she stood to throw a shockwave at the mess of attackers, knocking them back and spraying water from the puddles on the floor. "You only like me for my ginger locks."

He chuckled softly. "And your charming personality."

"There you go being a big softy again," she purred. Even in the middle of combat while she feared for Liara's life, Garrus could still make her laugh, not to mention set her heart racing. The hum over the radio was too much and she glared at him, needing to concentrate. She almost laughed as she noticed he was forming a puddle in the cowl of his armor from the downpouring sprinklers. "Just be careful you don't drown over there, Big Guy."

He glanced down, the moisture on him making the metallic flecks of Thulium shimmer on his skin, as if he was just noticing his own predicament and chuckled, leaning to the side to tip some of the accumulated water out. "Like a little water could take down Garrus Vakarian," he quipped.

"It only takes a couple of inches," she teased.

"Let's hope that isn't true for Ann Shepard, because I'll give you more than a couple."

Her frustrated laughter made Tali glance over at her and cock her head. "You're killing me, Vakarian." she said after waving Tali off. "And you complained my pheromones were distracting."

Once they fought through the cubicles upon cubicles full of Shadow Broker mercs, they came upon a locked office door. While Tali hacked the lock open, Shepard punched Garrus in his arm with a smirk on her face. "Ow, what was that for?" he laughed, rubbing the sore spot.

"How dare you speak to me like that in the heat of battle, Officer Vakarian."

She made certain he knew she was teasing and he laughed again. "Noted."

Tali was staring at them, her omnitool still raised in front of her and the tiny flecks of light that were her eyes narrowed to slits. Shepard flushed, realizing that Tali was figuring things out. Before the Quarian could question them, a shot resounded inside the room. Tali hurriedly returned her attention to the door and got it open. Shepard rushed in first, her pistol raised.

Vasir was standing beside a merc's body, and Shepard reluctantly lowered her weapon, but did not holster it. "Damn," Vasir said in a singsong voice. "If only I had been a little quicker, I might have stopped him." She indicated the body of a Salarian leaning up against the wall. The scene definitely suggested that the merc had killed the Salarian and then Vasir had swooped in and killed the merc.

"No sign of that data Liara mentioned in her call," Shepard said hoping Vasir would buy it and go. "Looks like a dead end."

"Speaking of which," Vasir said, narrowing her eyes. "Did you find your friend's body?"

"You mean this body?" Liara stepped out from a dark corner where she apparently had been hiding. The Asari was soaked like they were and had apparently been there, keeping herself safe until Shepard arrived. She had so much faith in Shepard and when she raised a pistol and aimed it at Vasir, Shepard did not hesitate to return the favor by aiming her own weapon at the SPECTRE.

"Something I should know?" Shepard spared a glance at Liara.

"This is the woman who tried to kill me," Liara said, advancing on Vasir.

Vasir chuckled. "You've had a rough day, so I'll let that slide. Why don't you put that gun down?"

"I saw you! I doubled back after I left. I watched you break into my apartment!"

Shepard narrowed her eyes, all of her suspicions confirmed. "You didn't know where Liara went because she hid the message. You needed me to find it for you."

Vasir sighed, knowing she was caught. "Thanks for the help."

"Once she had my location, she signaled the Shadow Broker's forces. They bombed the building to take me out. She found Sekat, took his data, and killed him. I'm guessing she's still got the disk on her," Liara explained.

"Good guess." Vasir held up a flashing data disc with a triumphant smirk on her face. "Not that you'll ever see what's on it... " There was a cracking sound of glass and Vasir glowed with biotics. The window behind her broke out and she threw the pieces in their direction. "You pureblood bitch!" she shouted.

Before Shepard could react, Liara threw up a barrier to shield all of them from the flying glass. As soon as the shards fell, Shepard rushed through the barrier and tackled Vasir. They tumbled over the sill and through a bit of the window that was still intact, shattering it to bits. Shepard panicked as they rolled out the window and down. She tried to grab for the sill, but her wet gloves slipped and they fell. Vasir called her biotics again, twisting them in mid air and hit Shepard with a biotic kick, slamming her all of the way to the ground. The wind flew from Shepard's lungs as she landed flat on her back, her grenade launcher jammed into her. As she struggled to stand, Vasir took off, and Liara with the assistance of her own biotics jumped out the window and hovered down to give chase. As Shepard fought to get her breath back after the jarring blow, she watched the two Asari disappear around a corner. She made it to her knees and Garrus and Tali were there. He helped her to her feet then scanned her quickly with his omnitool for injuries. "I'm fine," she said, giving him a thankful smile and he grinned back, knuckling her chin playfully.

There was no time to respond or acknowledge Tali's accusing glare before they were set upon by Vasir's back up. Still catching her breath, Shepard took cover behind a giant vid screen and they set to taking down the competition. She tried to call her biotics, but it made her head hurt. She'd probably knocked her amp around when she'd hit the floor. Instead, she fell back into her old routine of overload and incinerate programs on her omnitool. When they reached the lobby of the building, they fought through some more mercs and then ran outside to find Liara and Vasir both pinned in their own cover, firing blindly at each other.

When Vasir spotted Shepard and the others still alive, she pulled up her omnitool as evidenced by the orange glow coming from her cover spot. Shepard tried to run for her, but Vasir's sky car came flying to her and the woman jumped over the side of the walkway and into the car. Liara was already heading to an abandoned cab that was parked close by. Shepard followed. They all crammed into the cab and Shepard took the wheel, keeping her eye on the taillights of Vasir's car. "I'm fine by the way. Thanks for asking," she grunted to Liara as she took off.

They tracked Vasir in and out of traffic, Liara shouting from the seat beside her. Shepard calmly steered the vehicle trying to ignore the back seat driver. "Spirits, its like being back in the Mako," Garrus quipped, his hand on the head rest of her seat as he attempted not to crush Tali as they slid around in the back seat.

"I had nightmares about this for months after I returned to the Flotilla," Tali agreed.

"Would one of you comedians like to drive? Cuz I could just..." Shepard took her hands off the wheel and allowed the car to drift to the right.

"Truck!" Liara shouted, bracing her palm on the dash and closing her eyes.

"I see it," Shepard said taking back the wheel and expertly pulled up just in time to clear the truck. "Yep, there we go."

"You're enjoying this!" Liara accused.

"I think I need clean armor," Garrus said with a chuckle.

Shepard laughed as she continued to follow Vasir. "A head on collision at these speeds..." Liara said with a quaver in her voice.

"Yeah, I heard they can be bad for you," Shepard agreed as she dodged around some cars heading straight for them. Vasir was purposefully disrupting traffic in an attempt to shake them. Shepard refused to lose her.

Finally, they caught up and Shepard pulled up beside Vasir. Vasir attempted to ram their car with hers, but Shepard artfully piloted the cab away and then answered with a ram of her own. Vasir's car collided with another heading the opposite direction and it spun out, careening at max speed toward another of the suspended businesses that were all over Illium. She crash landed and Shepard piloted the cab to the parking lot of the hotel. They got out and a few truck fulls of mercs tried to way lay them so Vasir could escape. The four of them made short work of the mercs and headed into the hotel.

"Azure?" Shepard asked seeing a few pamphlets and other sexual memorabilia strewn around the room beside where Vasir had crashed. "What kind of hotel is this?"

Liara flushed. "It's a luxury resort with an... exotic edge. 'Azure' is slang for a part of the Asari body in some areas of Illium."

Shepard winked at Garrus as she waved one of the pamphlets around. She figured if Tali had figured out what was happening, she didn't have to be shy anymore. He cleared his throat and adjusted his rifle while she said to Liara, "Where?"

They started to walk toward Vasir's abandoned car. "Mainly the lower reaches, near the bottom."

Shepard chuckled. "I meant, 'where on the Asari body?'."

"So did I," Liara confirmed, making Shepard laugh even harder.

Near the car, they found a trail leading away of dark purple blood. Hopefully that would slow down Vasir enough so they could catch her. Shepard followed the trail cautiously. For as much blood as the woman was losing, she was leaving a large amount of destruction in her wake. They caught up with her at the hotel lounge where several guests were sitting and enjoying their meals and the company. Shepard loathed to pull her gun in such a public space, but Vasir could not get away. "It's over Vasir!" She shouted.

The Asari turned slowly, hatred blazing in her eyes. Some of the bystanders had begun to flee and Vasir grabbed the closest person she could find and held her like a human shield, a gun to her head. She taunted the woman and asked her name. "Ma... Mariana," the woman said meekly.

"Mariana, you want to live, don't you? Tell those people that you want to live." Vasir pressed her gun deeper into the woman's temple.

"Please..." The woman closed her eyes as tears began to fall.

"Vasir, you don't need to do this!" Shepard tried talking her down. It was never an easy thing when your target had been reduced to meat shields. This would take careful treatment.

"All you had to do was walk away. Now it gets ugly," the Asari growled.

"Please, I have a son," the hostage pleaded.

"A son?" Vasir tsked. "I hope he gets to see you again. I've heard losing a parent is just horrific for children. Scars them for life."

Shepard felt her heart rate increase. She knew what is was to lose a parent. "I'm going to end you, Vasir," Liara threatened in her soft but scary voice.

"It's okay, Liara. We'll handle it. The usual way." she took her eyes off Vasir to make sure Liara understood.

"You want Mariana's little boy to grow up without a mommy, Shepard? Thermal clips on the ground, now. Power cells, too."

"Is that it?" Shepard taunted, buying Liara time. "Vasir, I sacrificed thousands of lives on the Destiny Ascension including the council at the battle of the Citadel. I unleashed the Rachni on the galaxy. So for your sake, I hope your escape plan doesn't hinge on me hesitating to shoot a damn hostage!"

"You're bluffing." Vasir said, taking her gun from Mariana's temple and aiming it instead at Shepard.

"Now, Liara!" Shepard shouted and the table that Liara had silently grabbed with her biotics flew like a rocket at Vasir, knocking her clear across the lounge into a fountain and the hostage to the ground.

The woman quickly recovered and ran off while Shepard and the others surrounded the place where Vasir had splashed down. A blue glow under the water preceded Vasir shooting up out of the fountain and using a biotic charge to put distance between herself and her enemies. She was pretty tough to still be fighting after the beating and blood loss she'd endured. It was difficult getting a shot off at her through her barrier and her nearly constant use of her charge. She moved around the place at incredible speeds and Shepard couldn't help but feel humbled. Her biotics were no match for Vasir's. One charge and Shepard was usually spent for quite a while. This was ridiculous. Surrounding her meant nothing because she would charge and reappear outside the circle they had formed around her. Shepard tried to hit her with an incinerate here and there, but catching her was nearly impossible. Their only saving grace was that she was beginning to slow due to her injuries. Shepard was finally able to get off a few shots and whittle down her barrier.

Vasir made the mistake of trying a last ditch effort and Shepard took a chance. The Asari aimed her charge at Shepard and detonated the energy in her face, decimating her shields. Shepard recovered faster than she did and she grabbed her around her chest to keep her in place. Shepard felt electricity in the air as she started to charge her biotics for another charge to escape. "Shoot her!" Shepard shouted knowing that if she set off her charge while Shepard was holding her that it was almost a death sentence since she had taken down her shields on entry. When noting happened she shouted again. "Dammit, Garrus! Shoot her!" She held on tightly as Vasir's biotics continued to mount, causing the hair on the back of her neck to stand on end.

"Your shields are down, Shepard," he said panic in his subvocals. He was thinking if he shot Vasir it would hit her too.

"I trust you, Big Guy, now shoot her!" Shepard braced, holding Vasir as still as she could. The bullet knocked Vasir's head back and connected it with her chin. Shepard's teeth clacked together and she felt the spray of blood hit her skin. A burning pain skipped across her neck and she dropped the Asari's lifeless body at her feet. She reached up to cut the air off from the graze wound and stop the burning. As the others ran up to her, she raised her other hand in a thumbs up to show she was fine. "Nice, shot, Archangel." she said as he stepped over Vasir's body and took her chin in his hand and brushed her hand away to get a look at the flesh wound.

"Spirits," He pulled her into a tight hug, throwing all of Tali's doubt out the window. "Another half inch and you'd..." he choked on the rest of his sentence.

"It's okay," she soothed, pulling away and touching a shaking hand to his scarred mandible. "I'm fine. You did good."

Tali cleared her throat and when Shepard peeled her eyes away from Garrus', the Quarian was standing with her arms crossed and her hips cocked. Liara had recovered the disk from Vasir's corpse and was downloading whatever data was stored in it, oblivious to the scene around her. "We are talking about this later," Tali warned, dropping her arms and shaking her head. "Keelah, you think you're friends with people and then they hide stuff like this from you."

Her tone was mocking and Garrus' attempts to stutter out an explanation made her laugh. Shepard pulled away from him and while he endured Tali's vicious teasing onslaught, she moved to talk to Liara. "I'm putting the data through to the Normandy's computers. We can be at the Shadow Broker's base in a few hours," Liara said before Shepard could even speak. "He'll know about Vasir before long. If he decides to kill Feron..."

"We'll get Feron out of there alive, Liara I promise," Shepard said, placing a hand on Liara's shoulder.

"I know," she said, stepping away from Shepard's comforting hand. "You're here to help. Just like always."

"That's not a good thing?" Shepard asked, confused. Whatever Liara had endured in the last two years had hardened her almost to the point that Shepard barely recognized the frightened, soft spoken girl that barely knew how to hold a gun.

"When we first met on Therum, you saved me from the Geth. You fought a Krogan battlemaster while I cowered." Liara explained, wringing her hands. "Now you're doing it again. And I'm still leaning on you for help."

"That's what friends do, Liara," Shepard said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the universe.

She sighed and started to walk away. "I can get us there based on Sekat's data. The Normandy's stealth drive will keep them from detecting us. The Shadow Broker's agents are still shooting their way through Illium. With luck, they won't notice we've left until its too late."

Shepard jogged to catch up with her. "That's a little cold. They killed innocent people."

"You know what I mean," she scoffed as she stopped and turned to face Shepard again.

"Do I?" Shepard asked crossing her arms. "When I hit the ground back at the trade center, you went after Vasir without a backward look."

"A little fall wasn't going to kill you. I had to stay on Vasir. I had to stay rational, make the call. Like I did with Sekat." she said moving to lean on a rail to look out over Illium's sunrise.

"That's Vasir's fault, not yours."

"Sekat had no idea what the stakes were. I put him in harms way to get the data I needed. I got him killed. And I'd do it again, but from here on out, things will be simple. Get in, get Feron, get out." She turned and walked away again. "and kill anyone who tries to stop us."

"That's it?" Shepard asked, following again.

"That's it," she confirmed.

Shepard grabbed her arm to turn her and look at her face. "Will you just stop for a second? We'll be jumping several light years. There's time to talk"

"About what?" her voice was harsh. Shepard had never heard that tone from the normally soft spoken Asari.

"You haven't been the same since I came back, Liara."

"What do you want me to say, Shepard? That I mourned you? That I feel guilty because Feron got captured?" Her expression fell into sorrow and she looked away, unable to keep eye contact. "I made mistakes. I lost people. I helped get you back, and I want to do the same for Feron. I'll sit and talk once he's safe. Until then, enjoying the scenery is an insult to the man who saved both of us." She waved her hand dismissively at the sunrise and turned away to leave.

"Okay, let's go," Shepard sighed, waving her hand to gather her other friends and follow after Liara.

* * *

 

Shepard had a bit of time before they arrived within shuttle distance of the Shadow Broker's lair which she used to wash up her self and her armor. Liara spoke to no one until they were on the shuttle. She explained that the Shadow Broker lived on a ship orbiting a planet with a bit of an odd climate. Hagalaz had a harsh day cycle, so hot that all bodies of water boiled as the sun beat down on them. Then, less than ten minutes after the sun set, those same bodies of water snap froze in the cold of the night. Along the equator where the hot and cold weather met, a constant lightning storm hid the orbiting ship. It really was a clever hiding spot if you never wanted anyone to find you.

The ship was massive as Shepard caught sight of it outside the shuttle. "How do we get inside?" she asked casually.

"The shuttle bay is locked down. We'll need to land on the ship and hunt for a hatch," Liara said as if it were no big deal.

Shepard caught herself clenching her fists and nearly hyperventilating as she faced the idea of walking over the top of a ship, flying through space with no protection from the void. Garrus moved to sit beside her, taking one of her fists and prying it open to hold in his hand. She clung for dear life as he made that soothing coo in his throat and she remembered how to breathe. "Is there a problem?" Liara asked, noticing Shepard's distress.

"Shepard has been having a slight issue with open space since her... since the SR1," Garrus explained, his subharmonics not skipping a beat.

"I'll be fine," Shepard said, swallowing around the lump in her throat and trying to get her helmet off her belt with one shaking hand. The mother hen clucking returned to his throat as he helped her un-clip the helmet and secure it over her head. She had him check her seals and tubes three times before she was ready to face her newest, greatest fear. He put his own helmet on and Liara secured a breather mask over her face. "Okay, let's get this over with."

The shuttle pilot hovered just above the hull of the ship and Garrus still held her hand as he jumped out of the open hatch. Liara followed and he tugged Shepard's arm, pulling her along as the shuttle sped away, leaving them exposed. She squeezed his hand gratefully then took hers back, so she could pull out her weapon, just in case. "Its hard to pinpoint in this lightning, but I'm picking up signals from a communications array near the back of the ship."

"Then why didn't we land there?" Shepard whined, checking the status of her mag boots then heading in the direction Liara indicated. There was a harsh wind whipping around them and the huge lightning rods all over the hull sparked every few seconds as they were struck. Each time the noise sounded, Shepard jumped. Her nerves were shot already and they had just landed. That Garrus had been able to get her off the shuttle was testament to her trust in him and her own mental strength to be able to get over the wash of fear still twisting in her gut. To make matters worse, maintenance drones and security mechs decided they were hostile and would randomly pop up from different cubby holes in the ship to fire on them. They made their way to the middle of the ship where they could stand the tallest. There was a long walkway lined with capacitors ahead and there was where they were assaulted by the first of the Shadow Broker's troops. Shepard saw the bunch of troops approaching and refused to allow this to become a drawn out battle. She needed to get inside before she lost her cool. She reached up and fired her pistol at the capacitor closest to the bad guys. The impact sparked the lightning housed in the capacitor and it jumped from one merc to the next, frying them all almost instantaneously.

"Way to take away all of the fun, Shepard," Garrus said as he stood to survey the damage.

"Tell you what, Big Guy. If you let me use the capacitors and kill everyone as quickly as possible, you can count the kills as yours," she said not standing around to chat, but pushing forward.

"I would never take your brilliant kills from you," he said following right behind her.

They fought closer to the back of the ship and they were forced to move closer to the edge to get past a blockade. "Okay, clearly looking down was a mistake," Liara said with a shudder as Shepard shamelessly pressed herself to the wall as far from the edge as she could get.

When they finally came close to the back of the ship, they came across what resembled a narrow suspension bridge. Shepard hesitated and Garrus moved up just behind her and moved her along with a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "Not even a guard rail, I'll bet the Shadow Broker's goons looove patrolling the hull," she said sarcastically, her voice trembling. Just across the bridge, Liara found the hatch she had been looking for. She set up a bypass shunt program to hack the lock. "How long will it take?" Shepard asked, taking shelter in the small alcove that housed the hatch. Even the two half walls were giving her a small bit of peace of mind.

"I don't know Shepard. I've never broken into the Shadow Broker's base before." She tapped a few more keys on her omnitool and then glanced at Shepard with a small grin. "Well, not this one anyway."

As the program slowly did its job, they were forced to defend their position from more of the Shadow Broker's people. Liara defended her program as they fought while Shepard kept asking if she was sure it would work. When they'd finished off a few flying drones toward the front of the ship, Liara said, "Their attacks are disorganized. They'd be more effective if they all attacked at once."

"Please don't give the mercs ideas," Shepard begged as Liara hit an incoming group with a singularity. Shepard froze in place as the singularity shot three mercs off into the empty space above. Someone was having a hard time stopping saying the word no. Over and over again a woman mumbled. "No, no, no, no, no, no...."

"Shepard!" Garrus' voice pulled her back to herself and she realized the woman panicking was her.

She pressed her lips together and gave him a shaky nod. He studied her a moment more before accepting she had pulled herself together and went back to his shooting. "The next wave looks like a big one!" Liara warned from her slightly elevated position.

"You just had to give them tactical advice," Shepard grumbled.

"This just means there will be fewer to kill once we get inside," Liara said hopefully.

"Keep dreaming, T'Soni!" Shepard shouted as a beeping sound behind her indicated that the program had finished its cycle. "The door's open!"

Garrus and Liara finished off the mercs that had gathered and backed toward the door. Shepard opened the hatch and was the first one through, throwing herself against a nearby wall. When the door was closed behind them, she leaned over and breathed heavily. The helmet was strangling her and she grabbed at the clasps, releasing the seal and letting it drop to the floor as she took deep gulping breaths of air. Garrus rested a hand on her back as she leaned over. "Are you going to be alright?"

"I just need a minute," she said.

"What happened outside?" he asked, kneeling in front of her to look her in the eyes.

"Singularity," she breathed. Unable to finish the thought she mimed a ship taking off and cocked her head to ask if he understood.

"Oh," he said knowingly and patted the hand up and down that was on her back. He picked up her helmet and stood offering it to her. She swallowed one last time and took it from him, clipping it to her belt.

Liara expressed surprise at the amount of mercs still inside the base after they had killed so many outside. Shepard was more than happy to kill them as long as she didn't need to watch them propelled into space by a singularity. That image was going to haunt her nightmares. Liara directed them to where the Shadow Broker was holding her friend. Shepard hacked the door open and they found Feron, still alive but hooked up to the Broker's information network. Any tampering to the controls and he was shocked with a massive bolt of electricity. He explained that the only way to get him out was to completely cut the power, so they were off again. Shepard had to admit that she was curious to meet the Shadow Broker. Nobody had yet to survive the experience, but then nobody was her. She was on her second life already.

The long hallway they were in ended in a large door. Surprisingly, it was unlocked. Shepard and her team went in, guns blazing. Sitting rather calmly behind a desk toward the back of the gigantic round room was a rather gigantic alien. Shepard had never seen the like. Without more light, she couldn't see his face, but his silhouette was impressive. In fact, the only light in the room came from the information consoles behind him and a massive plasma container mounted in the ceiling that cast an eerie glow all around. "Here for the Drell? Reckless, even for you, Commander." The massive alien said in a deep gravely voice, ignoring their guns all pointed at him. She imagined that she could feel his voice rumbling the floor, almost like when you could feel the bass in a club.

"Not reckless, just determined. Ask your Asari SPECTRE about that." Shepard said boldly.

"Vasir was expendable. All her death cost me was time."

"Expendable, like Feron?" Liara spat, more anger in her voice than Shepard had ever heard before.

The Broker's head turned ever so slightly to the side as he looked at Liara. "Dr. T'soni. Your interference caused all this. Feron betrayed me when he handed you Shepard's body. The Drell is simply paying the price."

"Someone was bound to come after you for working with the Collectors," Shepard pointed out.

"It was a mutually beneficial partnership. Your arrival is convenient. The Collector's offer still stands."

"It'll be pretty hard to run a base this size with no crew," Shepard wasn't threatened. She'd faced down worse than him.

"They're replaceable. Your arrival is barely an interruption. Enough talk. My operations are too crucial to be compromised by a traitor."

"You're quite confident for someone with nowhere left to hide," Liara said, voicing Shepard's thoughts.

"You travel with fascinating companions, doctor. It's good you brought Archangel, T'Soni." The second his eyes fell on Garrus, Shepard stepped forward threateningly. "Your friend's bounty is still unclaimed."

"You're not putting a hand on anyone!" Liara threatened.

"It's pointless to challenge me, Asari. I know your every secret, while you fumble in the dark."

"Is that right?" Liara calmly began spouting facts as if she had studied up on him before she had come here. "You're a yahg, a pre-spaceflight species quarantined to their homeworld for massacring the Council's first contact teams. This base is older than your planet's discovery, which probably means you killed the original Shadow Broker sixty years ago, then took over. I'm guessing you were taken from your world by a trophy hunter who wanted a slave... or a pet. How am I doing?"

As Liara had spoken, the strange fins on the side of the Broker's face had begun to twitch in what Shepard guessed was annoyance. As soon as she finished speaking, he stood, unfolding into a 10' walking mountain with two huge forked horns on the top of his head. Shepard backed away and Liara circled around toward where Garrus had been before he moved to place himself in front of Shepard. "Is it too late to abort the mission?" Shepard asked softly as the Broker stared them down. Suddenly he roared, opening his mouth and revealing several layers of jagged teeth, almost like a shark's mouth. Shepard had no time to be impressed. He slammed a fist down on the giant desk in front of him, breaking it in half then he picked up the heavy stone and threw it like it weighed nothing. Shepard dove and knocked Liara out of the way just as Garrus took the brunt of the hit. The damaged desk broke again, pinning an unconscious Garrus under one of the larger pieces. Shepard frantically scanned with her visor to make certain he was still alive before scrambling with Liara behind another larger piece of the desk.

The Broker pulled out an assault rifle and unloaded in their direction. When the firing paused, she chanced a warp field, hoping to slow him down. All it did was put a small dent in his armor and piss him off. Liara tried her own biotics, but it didn't seen to work either. Shepard put her pistol away and reached for her grenade launcher. She had 6 grenades in the chamber. Hopefully it was enough. She peered up over the desk to see that he was slowly getting closer in spite of the biotics ravaging him. She took aim while Liara distracted him by darting from behind the desk to stand behind one of the structural pillars positioned around the room. The first grenade she fired landed at his feet and exploded, knocking him backwards. It effectively took down his shields and busted through some of his armor. When he realized that the tiny bullets that Liara was peppering him with from her pistol were actually hitting him, he activated some sort of shield powered by the plasma container above them. Her bullets immediately began bouncing off of him. Shepard ducked out of the way of the ricochet and moved closer to communicate with Liara. "The shield is kinetically sensitive! Energy and projectiles are bouncing off!" Liara shouted.

That took every weapon she had off the table. Shepard hefted the grenade launcher back onto her back and stood from her crouch. "Then we do this the hard way," she said, cracking her knuckles. This was probably going to hurt. Shepard circled around his back while Liara again distracted him by moving around the room. With a shout, Shepard put all her strength into the punch she landed on his back. The Broker growled and turned, presenting his horned face to her. She punched again, this time in said face. He stumbled a bit backwards and she charged at him, running as fast as she could. She jumped in the air, planning to use her momentum to hit him harder. While she was mid air, he dropped the shield and transferred omnitool energy into a huge omni shield which he used to slam into her and knock her to the ground halfway across the room. While she recovered, Liara hit him with more bullets so Shepard could get her grenade launcher out again. She aimed for his feet so the grenade would not bounce off the omni shield and roll back at her or Liara. The grenade stunned him again and she ran out to meet him in the middle of the room where he had brought the kinetic shield up again. She ran shoulder first into his omni shield, using every thing she could to try and push him back from where he was getting dangerously close to where Garrus laid. Liara came running with a biotic punch charged in her fist, but he was stronger and Shepard couldn't hold him long enough. He swung his arm with the omni shield and batted her away. She collided with Liara mid air, knocking them both to the floor. The Broker roared again while Liara glanced up at the ceiling where the Broker was siphoning the energy from the bowl of plasma. "If you can get him to bring up that shield again, I've got an idea." Liara whispered, getting up and scurrying out from under the containment unit.

Shepard followed her train of thought and ducked into cover to get another grenade off at him. It worked like a charm again, the Yahg apparently weren't a very intelligent species if he hadn't figured out Shepard's play yet. After he brought up his shields, with a battle cry, he ran at Shepard as she ran at him. Instead of colliding, Shepard dropped to the ground and rolled under him, coming out on the other side of the room, outside of the line of fire. "Liara, Now!"

Liara grabbed hold of the glass with her biotics and crushed it, bringing the cracked glass and some of the plasma down on top of the giant alien. He was eaten by the stuff and the combination of his body and the crackling electricity of the plasma caused an explosive reaction. The force of it knocked Shepard onto her ass. When the smoke cleared, Liara dodged bits of falling Yahg as she made her way to Shepard, offering her a hand up and breathing heavily. Shepard took her hand and stood, immediately running over to Garrus who was stirring. She lifted the heavy bit of desk off him and knelt at his side. "Hey, Big Guy, anything broken?"

He sat up slowly rubbing his head. "Ugh...hmm... my pride?"

She nudged his shoulder playfully and helped him to stand as the power flickered momentarily. While Shepard made certain Garrus was alright, a mess of voices started to check in over on a collection of screens behind where the Broker used to sit. The voices were panicked and Liara stood in front of the console, staring at all of the screens as the Shadow Broker's empire began to fall apart. Shepard watched her straighten her shoulders and the whole set of her body went rigid. Shepard left Garrus' side with a reassuring pat to approach Liara who had quickly pulled up a voice modifier. She spoke into the console, her soft voice picking up on the mic as the harsh gravely voice of the Yahg. Shepard cringed to hear her like that, but for what she was doing, it was necessary. She sent a network wide audio announcement that the momentary lapse in communications was caused by a systems upgrade. She went on to ask for a report on all active agents and their operations within the solar day. While she was speaking, Feron had come in ready to shoot, but the wind was blown out of his sails when he saw that Liara was the one speaking.

He limped over toward them. "Goddess of oceans... It's you. You... how?"

"Well, everyone who's ever seen him in person is dead, so..." Liara said turning to face them.

"...You're the new Shadow Broker," Feron concluded in disbelief.

"Is taking over as the Shadow Broker really a good idea?" Shepard asked, crossing her arms, worry for her friend driving her words.

"It was either that or lose everything. His contacts, his trading sources. Those will really help us. With the Shadow Broker's information network, I can give you... I can..." Shepard recognized fatigue in Liara. She was starting to get overwhelmed. Shepard stepped closer to her. Feron turned and awkwardly said he would check the power systems, realizing they needed some time. Almost as soon as he left, Liara hung her head, her back to Shepard and cried. "It's over. It's finally... for two years..." she sobbed as Shepard touched her back.

She turned and Shepard gathered her in her arms, allowing her to cry on her shoulder for as long as she needed. "It's all right," Shepard whispered. Liara clung to her like it was the last hug she was ever going to get. When she finally pulled away, she took Shepard's hands in hers prolonging the experience. Shepard realized that Liara probably hadn't had much contact with friends in the last two years if she had been threatening people like she'd heard her do to the man on the vid call when she'd arrived on Illium.

Liara dried her eyes and said, "I spent two years mourning you and Feron, and now I've got you both back. I... Let's see what we've got." She moved back over to the console and admired the setup. "No safeguards or user restrictions. It's like he never anticipated anyone but himself being here. And it's all ours."

Liara spoke passionately about the information she might get from the system and Shepard listened with a smile. Knowing she wouldn't be able to drag her away from any of this she said, "Don't be a stranger this time, okay?" Liara agreed and Shepard helped Garrus back to the shuttle bay after calling in the evac.

They didn't take off right away, Shepard wanting to make sure Liara was going to be okay. After a short visit to the control room in her civvies, Liara agreed to get cleaned up and come up to the Normandy for a few hours. Shepard got ready by stealing some wine from Kasumi's room in the lounge and having some glasses already poured when Liara knocked. "Come on in," she said with a smile, offering one of the glasses to Liara. Liara looked much more relaxed in her own version of civvies which happened to be a floor length dress with purple and pink designs that accented her blue skin beautifully. "Did you enjoy the tour?" Shepard asked as Liara took the drink, returning the smile and glancing at Shepard's fish tank where all of her fish swam happily having just been fed a few minutes ago.

"Yes, it's a beautiful ship, and I ran into Joker. He seemed happy to see me, although, he did ask if I had embraced eternity lately," she said with a soft chuckle.

"Of course he did," Shepard said with a sigh as Liara tried to coax Ferguson, the space hamster from his hidey hole in the cage on her shelf.

"I also spoke with Dr. Chakwas. I'm glad she's doing well," Liara explored Shepard's room a bit, looking at the data pad that Shepard had turned on its face with Kaidan's picture in it, probably wondering what it was. "I brought you something." She said, the frame she had in her office was in her hands. "It took some digging, but I recovered your tags."

"I thought I'd never see these again," Shepard said a little breathlessly, touching her fingers to the cool metal where it read her name and ID number.

"They changed hands more than once. Do you remember Admiral Hackett? He gave them to me so I could return them to you. He sends his best and hopes you're okay." Shepard didn't bother to tell Liara that Hackett had actually seen her first. She set the frame on her desk where she had previously had Kaidan's photo and leaned against the desk, crossing her arms. "So how _are_ you Shepard? I mean really, not what you tell your squad to keep up morale."

She looked at Liara and couldn't lie. "Between you and me, I've no idea how I'm gonna do this. I'm doing everything I can but..." She sighed.

"You've done more than most. There wouldn't be a man woman or child left on Horizon if not for you." Her confidence in her was almost as strong as Garrus'.

"I saved some of them. Not enough. And the Collectors will keep hitting colonies until I stop them." Shepard said, pacing across her room toward the bed and unable to allow herself to step under the skylight, the memory of the mercs flying up from the singularity flashing across her mind. She hugged herself.

"So, you'll stop them," Liara said like it was a fact.

Shepard chuckled. "And here I thought it'd be difficult."

"You'll get the job done. You always do. I just don't know what comes next. So tell me what you want. What _are_ you fighting for? A chance to give Garrus some peace?"

Shepard paused, looking away. Liara had acted like she was oblivious, but she had seen as much as Tali had. Shepard sighed, "He's been hurt, betrayed. He deserves something better," She gathered her wits and stepped under the skylight to sit on the bed drawing from the strength that Garrus had given her. "I never thought I'd find peace in the arms of a Turian, but..."

"Why not?" Liara asked. "Humans seem to have no trouble finding Asari attractive."

"Everyone finds Asari attractive," Shepard quipped.

Liara smiled. "I hope the two of you find some happiness, Shepard."

They continued to catch up, finishing off the bottle of wine before Liara had to get back to her base. Shepard got sleepy soon after, the stress of the day and the wine catching up with her.

She bit her lip and sat at her console. She finally got the nerve up to call down to the main battery. "Hey, Big Guy," she said in greeting.

"Shepard? Everything okay?" he asked. She could hear him tapping away on his console.

"Yeah," she said yawning. "But I wanted to ask if I could borrow you. I'm still a little shook up from that trek over the hull today."

A sympathetic chuckle sounded over the comm and he said, "I'll be right up. It might take me a bit to hobble up there on this leg though."

"Take your time," she slurred, her eye lids drooping.

She made her way to the bed and slipped under the blanket. She vaguely remembered the swish of her door and his amused chuckle when he found her already asleep. She also remembered him sliding under the blanket behind her and gently pushing his arm under her neck so he could hug her close to him and breathe her in, his mandibles tickling her cheek. _Peace in the arms of a Turian._

 


	20. The Krogan Wasteland

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard continues to do favors for her crew.

On their way to Tuchanka, they stopped off at a planet called Aeia where Jacob had received a mysterious distress call from. There his father, who he had thought was ten years dead, had survived the crash of his ship with most of the rest of the crew as well. The food on the surface that they had been forced to eat had decayed their minds, turning the males violent and the females into his father's willing slaves. Jacob had left it to Shepard to deal with his father and the others left alive. As much as she wanted to shoot the elder Taylor in the face and end his miserable existence, she set the other survivors up away from him and called the Alliance to pick everyone up. The distress call had not been pushed through by the Illusive Man as Jacob had thought, but Miranda of all people had brought him this closure.

Landing on Tuchanka was an interesting experience. The most noticeable thing making her uncomfortable was the lack of Garrus at her side. His leg was still healing and he'd shown a bit of fatigue on Aeia, so she had benched him, much to his chagrin. Grunt sat to her right, his legs twitching with the need to be active, and to her left sat Mordin. He was humming what she recognized as Gilbert and Sullivan and she quirked a smile, shaking her head. Mordin's advice had really helped her understand what she was getting herself into with Garrus. She was much more confident in herself since reading over his pamphlets and studying his diagrams. She had even taken the advice of getting herself some aloe on Illium, just in case the 'chafing' from his skin became an issue.

The shuttle touched down in a small underground docking bay and they stepped off onto the dusty planet. Tuchanka had suffered a nuclear war at the hands of the Krogan themselves, long before the Salarians had introduced them to space travel and uplifted them to fight the Rachni. From what she could see, the planet was still suffering. There was nothing 'pretty' here. It was all harsh angles and dull colors. Grunt harrumphed at the state of the planet that Okeer had educated him about while he was in the tank. They made their way toward the only exit in sight and were stopped by guards. Grunt growled low as the other Krogan threatened them with a shotgun. "Keep your rutting pet on a leash," the guard threatened and directed them toward the clan chief.

As Shepard picked her way through the compound (even that was being generous), she found that Krogan in large groups were extremely intimidating. She had Grunt at her back like a very effective guard dog and when she stepped up to the dais, they were held back by a few more large Krogan, blocking her view to the stone throne. "You must wait until the clan leader summons you. He is in talks."

She attempted to look over the large Krogan and all she caught was a glimpse of red armor before he shoved her back. There were several other Krogan on the dais and it was difficult to see anything around the solid mass of bodies. While a loud mouthed Krogan complained about reforms and she attempted to get a glimpse of anything, she heard a familiar voice call her name. "Good enough?" she said, shoving past the guard blocking her way. The other Krogan refused to move so she excused herself and made her way toward the dais.

Wrex met her halfway, climbing down off his throne and taking her hand in his, gripping it tightly to shake. "Shepard, my friend!" He gripped her shoulder like he was making sure she was real, his shake nearly pulling her off balance. She couldn't stop grinning. She had missed the ornery bastard. "You look well for dead, Shepard. Should have known the void couldn't hold you."

"Wrex! Looks like you've done well for yourself," she said glancing around at all of the Krogan that apparently had bent knee to Wrex as Chief. "Glad we didn't have to kill each other on Virmire." she joked.

He chuckled. "You made the rise of Urdnot possible. Virmire was a turning point for the Krogan, though not everyone was happy about it," he rumbled glancing at the loud mouth who had been complaining when she arrived. "Destroying Saren's genophage cure freed us from his manipulation. I used that to spur the clans to unify under Urdnot."

"You abandoned many traditions to get your way," the loudmouth started up again. "Dangerous."

Wrex hauled off and headbutted the offender. "Speak when spoken to, Uvenk. I'll drag your clan to glory whether it likes it or not." Wrex resumed his place on his throne and Shepard followed to stand before him, smirking at the Krogan who was recovering from the insult and rubbing his forehead plates. "Now, Shepard, what brings you here? How's the Normandy?"

"Died a little more permanently than I did."

"Well, you look good. Ah, the benefits of a redundant nervous system."

"Yeah, humans don't have that," She grinned, crossing her arms.

"Oh, it must have been painful then," he teased. "But you're standing here, and you've got a strong new ship. Takes me back to the old days. Us against the unknown... killing it with big guns... Good times! So have you run into any of the others out there?"

"Of course, I saved the best for last, Wrex." He was now eyeing her entourage, his eyes squinting at Grunt. "I actually had a few questions. It's why I came here."

Wrex ignored her, still staring at Grunt. "Where are you from whelp? Was your clan destroyed before you could learn what is expected of you?"

Grunt stepped forward. "I have no clan. I was tank bred by the warlord Okeer."

Loudmouth butted in again. "You are the offspring of a syringe!"

"I am pure Krogan!" Grunt stated. "You should be in awe."

"Okeer is a very old name," Wrex rumbled. "A very hated name."

"He is dead," Grunt stated, drawing himself up taller.

"Of course, you're with Shepard. How could he be alive?" Wrex laughed.

"I need Grunt back up to speed. What's wrong with him?" she asked, not understanding what Wrex was seeing.

"There's nothing wrong with him. He's becoming a full adult."

"Ah, puberty ritual. Common in hormone driven species," Mordin chimed in.

"I don't care what aliens call it," Wrex said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "Krogan undergo the rite of passage."

"Too far, Wrex!" Loudmouth again. He was starting to grate on Shepard's nerves. "Your clan may rule but this thing is not Krogan." He stormed off in a fit, sparing her from having to listen to him anymore.

"Idiot!" Wrex grumbled. "So Grunt, do you wish to stand with Urdnot?"

"This is his choice," Shepard said. Allowing Grunt to choose for himself felt like the right thing to do.

The Krogan in question stepped away from the dais to stare out over the area. His fists clenched and unclenched as he fought some inner struggle. Finally, he turned back to Wrex and said, "It is in my blood. It is what I am for."

"Good boy," Wrex said with a note of pride in his voice. "Speak with the Shaman," he pointed over his shoulder to a stairwell that apparently led where they needed to go. "Give him a good show and he'll set you on the path." Wrex moved back to his throne and Shepard began to walk away to take Grunt where he needed to go. "You too, Shepard. How many times have you stepped in a mess for your crew, hm?"

When they got to the Shaman's quarters, she found out where loudmouth had gone in his tantrum. He was arguing with the Shaman about accepting Grunt's request to participate in the Rite. "I'll speak for myself!" Grunt spoke up after the Shaman defended him.

The Shaman came and looked Grunt up and down, also giving him a good sniff. "This is the tank bred? It is very lifelike. Smells correct as well. Your protests ring hollow, Uvenk."

"I don't care what this idiot says," Shepard said, fed up with the interruptions."Grunt has the right to be here!"

"There's some fire," the Shaman said appreciatively. "And from an alien. Oh the shame this heaps on those who whine like pups." He turned a glare on Loudmouth Uvenk.

"If this must stand on ritual, then I invoke a denial! My Krant stands against him. He has no one!"

The Shaman growled. "My patience is tested, but Uvenk invokes correctly. Grunt, who is your Krant? Allies willing to fight and die on your behalf."

"Grunt will strengthen clan Urdnot. Name our target and it will die!" Shepard stepped up as Grunt hung his head, thinking he had no Krant.

"Spoken well!" the Shaman seemed glad that she had placed herself as Grunt's Krant. "Most aliens and some Krogan..." he glanced at Uvenk. "do not understand our ways. I believe this human does."

"Aliens don't know strength!" Uvenk ranted, upset at the insult heaped on him. He continued ranting about the unfairness of it all and Shepard reached her boiling point. While he complained, she set her hips just like Wrex had taught her and reared back. The headbutt was unexpected and the Loudmouth stumbled back. "You dare!"

The Shaman let out a loud bellowing laugh. "I like this human! She understands!"

"I withdraw my denial," Uvenk grumbled, rubbing his plates. "This will be decided elsewhere." While exiting, he shoulder checked Shepard and she was tempted to pull her pistol out and shoot him, but that would get her nowhere on Tuchanka.

The Shaman led them to a large ruin that looked more like a clearing than any type of arena. He instructed them to signal the keystone three times. If they survived what ever came at them the first two times and then held their own for at least five minutes against whatever the third signal called forth that Grunt would be accepted into clan Urdnot as a full adult with all of the rights that afforded him. Once the Shaman retreated, Shepard slammed her palm down on the button to slam the keystone down into the ground, sending a wave through the area and disturbing the wildlife. "Bring it on!" Grunt shouted and let out a battle cry.

* * *

 

Shepard patted out the small fire on her armor as the Klixen in front of her writhed under her warp field. "Sweet Jesus! Is that the last of them?" She glanced around and saw no more Klixen scurrying around the field.

"All Klixen eliminated," Mordin confirmed.

"Okay, one more signal and we can get out of here," she said, side skipping to the button and slamming it down.

As they waited, the ground began to rumble. "Do you feel that?" Grunt said excitedly.

Shepard gazed around the field, looking for the source of the quake. Her visor was picking up a long thin tentacle that stuck out of the ground. Before the visor identified the thing, she recognized it. "Oh, shit!" she shouted. "Take cover! We summoned a Thresher Maw!"

The giant worm crashed up through the ground ahead of them as she scurried to get out of its way. She had fought a Maw before, but that was in the Mako where they had protection from its acid like spit. She clambered to get her helmet on to at least add a small layer of protection. The Maw shrieked and she pulled out her brand new rocket launcher that she'd picked up on Illium before they left. Thanking her foresight to bring it, she looked up over her cover and saw the Maw slipping back down under the ground while Mordin threw incinerations at it and Grunt shot at it with his shot gun, getting a little closer than she would like.

She watched the ground erupting everywhere the Maw went, burrowing just below the surface. At least when it stopped, she knew exactly where it was going to come up. She took aim and as soon as it shot up from the ground, she unloaded two back to back rockets in its direction. The rockets hit and the Maw shrieked again, throwing globs of angry sizzling green spit in her direction. She dodged out of the way, but the splatter as it hit the ground was unavoidable. Her calf burned as the spit ate through her armor. Gritting her teeth against the pain, she hit the medigel dispenser and got up to take another shot. The Maw was moving again. She tracked it through the ground and fired again when it surfaced, only getting in one shot before it spat at her. Luckily no more spit hit her that time and she knelt and reloaded the launcher. How long had it been since the Maw had appeared? She lost track of time.

Three rockets and about 4 more acid burns later, Shepard couldn't believe her eyes as the Maw shrunk below the ground, wailing in agony and died. "We killed it," she said in disbelief.

Grunt was laughing loudly and Mordin was scanning the far off corpse with his omnitool. "Appears so."

Movement drew her attention and she glanced over to see that loudmouth had made his way to them. "We've got company," she said.

"Good, I want more," Grunt growled.

The idiot had the nerve to invite Grunt into his clan after seeing how strong he was because they'd killed the Maw. "If I know Grunt, your answer's coming at muzzle velocity," Shepard commented with a chuckle, hissing after the movement tugged at the burn on her stomach.

"You _do_ know Grunt," Grunt agreed, hefting his shotgun and then charging Uvenk. After they collided, Shepard took cover and they were forced to fight off Uvenk's entire Krant. "Uvenk is meat. Let's signal at the keystone and get the hell out of here," Grunt said after they had taken care of the problem. "You need patching up, Shepard."

"Well, that's nothing new," she sighed as Mordin worried at her burns.

"Acid neutralized with medigel. Efficient. Burns need treatment. Recommend two days to recover," Mordin said with a smile.

"Two days?" she protested. "What about Maelon?"

"Waited this long, can wait two days," Mordin scoffed waving his hand dismissively.

* * *

 

When she returned to the Normandy, she went down to the med bay. She passed the mess on her way and waved to Garrus who was eating lunch with Tali. Chakwas chided her when she walked in and she chuckled. "At least I'm still standing."

Chakwas was cutting the ruined armor from her skin when Garrus strolled in, still favoring his injured leg. "What is it this time, Shepard? I can't leave you alone for an hour it seems."

"Hey, I killed a Thresher Maw today. I'd say I came out relatively no worse for the wear." She hissed as Chakwas peeled back the medigel from her calf to sanitize the burn before putting a soothing ointment over it and sealing it with more medigel.

"Unless you are here to help, Garrus, I'd appreciate some privacy," Chakwas said.

He turned to leave, but she protested. "If he could stay, I think I might need someone to beat up on while you rip that chest piece off my stomach."

Chakwas narrowed her eyes, but relented as Shepard stuck out her bottom lip and batted her eyelashes. "Fine, although a sedative would work just as well."

She clutched Garrus' hand as Chakwas unclipped her armor and pulled the heavy chest plate away. Setting it aside, she unzipped the under armor and Shepard was left with her sports bra and the bit of under armor that had fused into her skin on her stomach. Garrus grabbed a nearby mouth guard and shoved it in Shepard's mouth before Chakwas got out her scalpel and began artfully cutting the material from the skin. Shepard was thankful for the mouth guard as she writhed and tried to hold as still as possible. She groaned around the rubber, and squeezed Garrus' hand as tightly as she could. After a blister popped under the dried up medigel, she growled in her throat and glared at Chakwas. The woman apologized, and went back to her work. Garrus was rumbling deep in his chest and Shepard took painful shallow breaths and rested her forehead on his chest for the comforting vibrations. His free hand came up and he ran it through her hair, almost petting her as she clung to him through the drawn out process.

When the piece was removed, Chakwas doused the wound in something to prevent infection and Shepard nearly climbed up Garrus like a tree to get away. "Keep her still, or I will sedate her," Chakwas warned.

Shepard shook her head, the mouth guard still in place. _I'll behave_. She said with her eyes. The worst was over. Her stomach had gotten the largest splash and it was the most sensitive area. As soon as Chakwas had sanitized it and treated it with the same stuff she'd put on her calf, Shepard sighed and spat out the mouth guard. "Thank you." She gazed up at Garrus whose intense eyes stared back at her and made her smile. He nodded and Chakwas set to work on the other three wounds. Two on her left arm and the final one on her left shoulder blade.

Chakwas gave her some painkillers and shooed her after a short lecture. "Your implant scars are all but gone," Garrus pointed out as he followed her to the mess.

She reached up and touched her face feeling smooth skin where there had been deep scars just weeks ago. "I guess I hadn't noticed," she said shrugging and then wincing as the gesture tugged at a few of her burns. She'd been so preoccupied with everyone else and her research on Turians that she'd not taken the time to worry about how messed up her face looked. She changed the subject before reaching into a cabinet to get the coffee grounds down and pulling her stomach wound. "So Wrex is Chief of several clans down on the surface."

Garrus chuffed at her, noticing the strain as she reached and shooed her hands away. He reached over her head and proceeded to skillfully brew a pot of coffee. "Wrex? Chief? I think I'd like to see that."

"Where'd you learn to make coffee?" She asked, amazed.

He glanced at her and smirked. "You know, researching humans doesn't just involve the porn that Joker 'helpfully' passed my way."

"You went to Joker?" She asked, a bit shocked that he had spoken to someone else about their potential relationship.

His subvocals hummed a little concern as he said, "Well, uh, he's the only human male on the crew I was really comfortable asking. Jacob has his own crush on you and Zaeed, well... you know."

"Jacob has a crush on me?" She had noticed the flirting, but he was extremely subtle about it and she had played it off as just his personality.

"Shepard, I know you are a bit slow when it comes to picking up on pheromones, but I'm pretty sure that every appropriately aged male on this ship, and some of the females, have a crush on you." He chuckled, pouring her a mug of coffee adding cream and sugar and handing it over. "I was actually honored when you decided I was the one you were interested in."

She was shocked. Was she that popular? She'd never seen herself as particularly attractive. She was too tall and she never cared what she looked like, dressing down most of the time because she just couldn't be bothered. She rubbed her free hand through her hair, knowing it looked awful, and sighed, accepting the information and storing it away to haunt her later. She bit her lip and looked at him, smiling around the gesture. "I guess I should tell you, I kind of asked Mordin some questions."

His eyes widened and in the expression she saw laughter. "Ha, oh, Shepard. Was it... That had to be awkward."

"It was actually quite informative... until he decided to mock me after getting the important information to me." She smiled around her mug then took a sip. The coffee Garrus had made was exceptional, exactly how she liked it. She closed her eyes and sighed with pleasure. "He sent me diagrams."

Garrus laughed out loud, drawing a few stares from some of the crew lingering around the mess. She snorted a bit herself and he took her elbow to lead her somewhere more quiet. The main battery was closest and when they got there, she gingerly sat on the crate she'd made her personal chair and he said, "So we have clinical from Mordin and filthy from Joker. Let's hope there is a middle ground."

"I have faith in us, Big Guy," she said, smiling and then taking another sip of the hot coffee.

He nodded and hummed, then dropped the subject. "So tell me how you managed to get spat on by a Thresher Maw." She told him about Grunt's rite of passage and the bunch of critters they'd fought off before the Maw even showed up. "Puberty. Couldn't we have just taken him to Omega and bought him a few dances?"

Shepard chuckled. "Somehow, I am not certain that would have helped. Either way, I'm holed up for a few days before we can go and rescue Mordin's colleague."

"Please, tell me I can come with you this time?" he begged. "Tali will not leave me alone since she figured it out."

"How's that leg doing?" she asked him, her own concern flooding her voice.

"In a few days, I promise I will be completely ready for whatever Tuchanka can throw at us," he said. His subharmonics told her he wasn't lying. "Unless it's another Thresher Maw," he teased.

"Okay, fine, twist my arm," she joked, rolling her eyes. She watched him puzzle out her turn of phrase before smiling widely. She loved that expression. For whatever reason, watching him gain more information on how to read her and how excited it usually made him when he figured it out on his own made the butterflies flutter just a little harder in her stomach. She caught herself staring and flushed, looking away.

"You just had a dirty thought, didn't you?" he asked, ready to tease.

"Not really _dirty._ " she said thinking of how to phrase the next bit without making it awkward. She tapped her nails on the mug and he moved closer, shooing her so he could sit beside her. She stared into her mug as she spoke. "Remember when we first met, how easily we learned to read each other? Well, I was just thinking how much I would have missed out on if I'd never memorized your every expression and put forth the effort to understand the wonderful second language underneath your translator."

His arm snaked around her shoulders, careful not to touch any of her burns and she rested her head on his chest just above his steady heart. "I know what you mean," he agreed.

The silence was perfect. They sat for a while, not saying anything as she finished her coffee and he rubbed his talon gently over the skin of her shoulder. "I missed you today," she said finally.

"Think how I felt. All I had to do was calibrate the guns and listen to Tali worry about whether you would be allergic to me," he chuckled.

She snorted, pulling away to look up at him. "I'm pretty sure we've had enough contact with each other's blood to know that really won't be an issue."

"You see, that's what I said," he agreed.

"Well, I think I'm going to get changed, do my rounds and then hit the hay," she said, standing up and already missing his warmth beside her. "I'll see ya, Big Guy."

"Good night, Shepard," he smiled warmly and stood so he could get back to his duties. It was the moments like those that helped her through the bad days. The stolen bits of peace between friends that made her believe that the Universe was worth saving.

 

Garrus was back where he belonged. On her six. His leg seemed to be giving him no trouble at all as they moved through Wrex's compound to talk to the Scout Wrex had pointed Mordin to. She itched under her armor where the acid burns were finishing up their final healing. Wrex's scout pointed them toward an old abandoned hospital miles away in a different clan's territory. Then he offered them a Tomka truck to borrow to transport them. "My leg just healed, Shepard. Let's try to keep the terrible driving to a minimum on this trip," Garrus begged as she refused to let him drive the massive six wheeled monstrosity.

"That hurts my feelings," she pouted and he clicked his mandibles at her expression.

A little ways outside the hospital, they were forced to stop the truck because the road was too badly damaged to continue any other way except on foot. The terrain was rough and the weather hot, making her healing burns itch even worse as she began to sweat. Her mood was starting to go down hill at the discomfort. "Something wrong, Shepard?" Garrus asked as she grumbled.

"I might need to borrow your talons to scratch these damn burns," she quipped, trying to keep the mood lighter.

"Much too sharp," Mordin muttered as he scanned the area.

Garrus grinned at her as she rolled her eyes and continued forward. They were soon met by Clan Weyrloc sentries and guards as they made their way to the hospital. There were not only Krogan but Vorcha too and that told Shepard they were dealing with Blood Pack involvement as well as the rogue clan. "I swear if any of them have flamethrowers, I quit."

"You may want to quit now," Garrus said looking through his scope. He unloaded a round into the distance and after a few moments there was a small explosion.

"Why me?" she asked, pushing forward.

They made it into the Hospital and Mordin started muttering. "Re-purposed Krogan hospital. Sturdy, built to withstand punishment."

"That's unfortunate. Hospitals aren't fun to fight through," Garrus said very seriously. She knew there was something ridiculous coming because he was chuckling in his subharmonics.

"What _is_ fun to fight through?" she asked, hoping he could help brighten her mood.

"Gardens, electronics shops, antiques stores, but only if they're classy," he said in a mock hoity toity accent. She was not disappointed and she snorted as she descended the stairs ahead of them.

Mordin spotted a dead body at the bottom of the stairs and he rushed ahead to scan it. He noted that the unknown human had been the victim of some pretty awful experiments."What do you think they're doing here?" Shepard asked, chafing at the sight of the torture.

"Likely kidnapped Maelon to help cure genophage," Mordin sighed, shutting off his omnitool.

They continued on only to be met by a large group of Blood Pack Krogan and their pet Vorcha. The one speaking began to preach. If there was anything Shepard had learned to do in her time it was not let a crazy person finish their rant. Interrupt and surprise them. "You talk too much," she growled as she pulled her pistol and shot at a gas pipe beneath the walkway he stood on. The valve flew off, letting a spray of gas out into the air as the Krogan laughed and aimed his gun at her thinking she had missed her target. She smirked and narrowed her eyes, unleashing another bullet that sparked the gas and created a blast of fire. "I don't miss."

The Spokesman screamed as he was caught on fire and burned alive in his armor. The rest of the group began to attack them and Shepard found it difficult to find cover as they attacked from above and others circled around to come down the ramp to the right and flank them. "Don't let those flamethrowers near you!" Garrus shouted as the Vorcha in question came down the ramp. He took out one as the second made its way toward Shepard. She quickly called up her incinerate program to blow the tanks on his back, but Garrus was quicker with his overload. The Vorcha flailed and hissed, trying to get the sparked tanks from his back, but they exploded quickly. Shepard redirected her incinerate at a charging Krogan. He kept coming as if the attack had zero effect on him. She holstered her pistol and pulled her shotgun, unleashing a warp field to take out his regeneration. Then she shot him full of pellets and he went down. "I think that's all of them," Garrus called from somewhere to her left.

She stood up from behind the tiny crate she'd used as cover from the shots coming from over head. Catching her breath, she gagged. "Ugh, it smells like burnt Krogan. It's terrible."

"You were the one who decided to cook him in his armor," Garrus hefted his rifle over his shoulder as he grinned at her.

"He looked cold," she shrugged with a grin of her own.

The rest of the fight through the Hospital was typical. More Krogan and more Vorcha and even a few Varren thrown in to switch things up a bit. She knocked the animals back with her shockwave and unloaded her shotgun at them as her other two team mates covered the larger targets. As they found more evidence of experiments to cure the genophage, Shepard found out some unexpected things about Mordin and how he viewed the world.

Deep in the bowels of the Hospital, they found Mordin's colleague. Shepard was disgusted to figure out that Maelon had not been kidnapped, but was there of his own free will to cure the genophage. Mordin was shocked and appalled. He shouted at Maelon about their work and how it was the best thing at the time. When he threatened the other Salarian with a pistol, she stopped him. "Mordin, you don't need to do this. You're not a murderer."

He took a deep breath in through his nose. One of his nervous habits. "No, not a murderer. Thank you, Shepard."

Maelon fled and Mordin talked quickly to himself while tapping on the consoles that were flashing though readings and medical data. He seemed morally torn about whether to keep the data or not. It could be used to help find a cure for the genophage. Shepard thought of Wrex and his ability to bring a certain stability and unity to the Krogan people. If he were in charge, the race may just have a chance. "It's better to keep the data and not need it than to throw away the help," Shepard offered her opinion.

"Point taken," Mordin agreed. "Copying data and wiping local copy." Mordin was very interested in leaving Tuchanka and after all of this, Shepard couldn't blame him. A lot of moral and spiritual questions had been dragged to the surface as they fought through that hospital. Garrus had called it in the beginning this mission was not fun.

 


	21. It's a Trap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akbar would have seen this coming.

While Shepard was doing her rounds the night after they left Tuchanka, she found herself having a very interesting discussion with Samara as they sat on the floor in front of the starboard observation window. When Samara had first come aboard, Shepard had not known what to think about her. The Asari was very soft spoken, just like Liara and she was prone to meditating the day away. She had insisted on sharing her observation window with Shepard as they talked about her lengthy past. The woman was nearing 1000 years old and she certainly had stories to tell. Shepard sat, her knees up in front of her, her chin resting on them, a slight defensive posture that helped her block out the void as it whizzed by outside. She studied the Asari's face instead of looking out the window as Samara was. Her jaw was very chiseled for an Asari and her eyes were an icy blue that almost glowed. She had none of the tattoo like marks that some Asari had, but her crests were speckled like Liara's. She had red armor-like plates embedded into her forehead that resembled a tiara, framing her brow. If Shepard thought that Miranda's cat suit was racy, Samara's red scaled one piece armor suit left little to the imagination. The front dipped so low that Shepard could see her belly button and she wondered how she kept her amazingly perky breasts in place while she moved.

Samara was telling her about the criminal she had been tracking when they'd met, a very 'personal' topic for her, when EDI informed her that there was an urgent call from the Illusive Man. "Go, Shepard. It is okay. We shall discuss Morinth later," Samara said with a gentle bow of her head.

Once Shepard had made her way up to the CIC and into the comm room, the Illusive Man looked restless. He was standing, unusual since he always looked so calm in his chair with his legs crossed. When he noticed her there, he took a swift drag from his cigarette and said quickly, "Shepard, we caught a break. I interrupted a distress call from a Turian patrol. They stumbled on to a Collector ship beyond the Korlus system." He began pacing. "The Turians were wiped out, but not before they crippled the Collector vessel." Finally, he sat in his chair, but did not assume his usual relaxed demeanor. "I need you to board that ship and get some hard data on the Collectors. Find us a way to get to their homeworld."

Shepard was extremely suspicious of his demeanor. "Hard to imagine how a Turian patrol could take out a Collector ship." She pointed out, crossing her arms and hoping for some more to go on.

"Reports indicate the hull's intact, but all systems seem to be offline. They could be making repairs as we speak. I'm not saying it won't be dangerous, but we can't let an opportunity like this slip by," he said a bit more calmly.

"If they had a patrol out there, why aren't the Turians sending a recon team in?"

"They will, eventually, but I intercepted the transmissions. In the meantime, we're feeding them false reports. You're close enough that you can be in and out before the Turians learn the truth."

His actions and what he was saying really didn't sit right with her, but it would be nice to get something to go on with the Collectors. They had so little information. "Are you sure this information is good?"

"Information is my weapon Shepard, Its good."

She sighed, uncrossing her arms. "Send me the coordinates and I'll take care of it."

"Already sent. Once you're aboard the ship, establish an up-link with EDI. She'll mine their data for information regarding the Omega 4 relay. Good luck Shepard."

As the comm channel closed around her, Shepard rolled her eyes and hated what she was walking into. "Coordinates punched in." Joker said from the bridge. "Let's go find us a Collector ship."

* * *

 

Mere hours later, The shuttle landed them in a small alcove in the silent vessel. The floor was squishy under her feet and she shuddered inside her helmet. The walls looked organic and just as slimy as the floor. "I love what they've done with the place," Garrus quipped, breaking the eerie silence. His voice echoed from inside his own helmet as they moved slowly ahead.

"It looks like a giant insect hive," Tali commented softly.

"Thanks for that image," Shepard sighed. She'd been trying to ignore that same comparison as it bounced around in her head.

"Sorry," Tali said as Garrus chuckled. They followed what seemed to be a path heading in the direction EDI had established as the way they wanted to go to find her a place to up-link. She also indicated that her scans showed that this was indeed the same vessel that they had encountered on Horizon. Shepard watched warily in every direction, waiting for a trap to spring at any moment. They soon came across a haphazard collection of the same pods they had seen on Horizon, followed by a pile of awful smelling bodies. "Why would the Collectors just leave these bodies lying around?" Tali said with curiosity.

Shepard reluctantly knelt beside the pile to get a closer look. "Must have been used for testing. I'd say these subjects didn't pass," Garrus mused as Shepard poked around.

"There _are_ worse things than death," Shepard sighed, standing back up. "Like being a test subject for twisted aliens."

"That is really not reassuring, Shepard," Tali said, backing away so they could continue forward.

A bit further down the path, they came across a pod hooked up to what looked like strange medical equipment. Inside the pod, surprisingly, was a Collector. Shepard scanned the computer with her omnitool while warily watching the pod for activity. The subject looked dead, but she refused to be caught unaware. "EDI, I'm uploading the data from this terminal. See if you can figure out what they were up to." Shepard said, moving to get a better look at the subject.

"Data received. Analyzing." EDI paused as she mined the information. "The Collectors were running baseline genetic comparisons between their species and humanity."

"Are they looking for similarities?" Shepard asked with a frown.

"I have no hypothesis on their motivations. All I have are the preliminary results. They reveal something remarkable. A Quad strand genetic structure, identical to traces collected from ancient ruins. Only one race is known to have this structure. The Protheans."

Shepard took a step backward in disgust. "My God, The Protheans didn't vanish. They're just working for the Reapers now."

"These are no longer Protheans, Shepard." EDI corrected. "Their genes show distinct signs of extensive genetic rewrite. The Reapers have re-purposed them to suit their needs."

"You'd think somebody would have picked up on this," Shepard mused, taking one last look at the inert Collector.

"No one has had an opportunity to study a Collector genetic code in this detail. I've already matched two thousand alleles to recorded fragments. This Collector likely descends from a Prothean Colony in the Styx Theta Cluster, but there are signs of extreme alteration. Three fewer chromosomes. Reduced hetero-chromatin structure. Elimination of superfluous 'junk' sequences," EDI rambled.

Shepard's head was spinning from all of the biological talk. "The Reapers didn't wipe out the Protheans. They turned them into monsters and enslaved them." She sighed, saddened by the situation. It may have been better not knowing the truth. "Still, they're working for the Reapers now, and we have to stop them. Let's find what we need before the Collectors come to salvage this vessel. Move out."

She led her people onward. "Look, on the ceiling. More of those strange pods." Garrus pointed out as they stepped into a small open space.

"How many do you think are full?" Tali mused as they continued on.

"Too many," Shepard growled. As they continued on, Joker interrupted to explain over her comm that he had a hunch and let EDI run with it. This was the same vessel that had destroyed the original Normandy and spaced her. Now it was personal. "The same ship dogging me for two years? Way beyond coincidence."

"Something doesn't add up, Commander. Watch your back," Joker warned.

A short distance up, they came across a large open area full to the brim with pods. "Keelah," Tali whispered as they took in the sheer number of pods that spanned the area.

"They could abduct every human in the Terminus systems and still not have enough to fill all of those pods," Garrus calculated.

"They're going to go after Earth," Shepard shivered at the thought. They needed to stop these monsters.

Something nagged at Shepard as she approached what looked like a control panel. It had been itching at the back of her mind since they'd departed the shuttle. Something was off. Before she could establish the up-link for EDI, Garrus put words to her feeling. "Shepard, have you noticed that we are on board a vessel that apparently just was shut down by a battle with a Turian vessel, but we have yet to see any Collector bodies?"

She grudgingly nodded, her back stiffening as he pointed out exactly what was wrong with this picture. Her hand hovered over the console, afraid to touch anything else that might draw attention to their presence. "We need this data. Be ready." She paused, taking a breath and activated her omnitool. "EDI, I'm setting up a bridge between you and the Collector ship. See if you can get anything useful from the data banks."

After a few moments, EDI's sultry voice said, "Data mine in progress, Shepard."

The silence while she worked was unbearable. Shepard tapped her foot, eager to get the information and get out of there before the Collectors decided to spring a trap. "Uh, that can't be good." Joker's voice froze the blood in her veins. Before she could respond, a flash of light blinded her for a moment and she heard what sounded like something large and metallic unlatching all around her.

She glanced around and blinked away the dots over her vision. "What the hell was that?!"

"Major power surge. Everything went dark, but we're back up now," Joker reported.

"I managed to divert the majority of the overload to non-critical systems," EDI purred. "Shepard. It was not a malfunction. This was a trap."

EDI's statement was punctuated with a rumble of the ground and a hiss of hydraulics as the platform they were standing on, detached from it's place and began spinning upwards. It hovered for a moment before taking off in a random direction. "We need a little help here, EDI." Shepard pleaded, hovering her arms to maintain her balance on the flying platform.

"I am having trouble maintaining connection. There is someone else in the system." The platform slammed into another one similar to it and Shepard fought to stay standing. She glanced around at their surroundings while Garrus helped Tali to her feet. In the distance another platform was heading in their direction. "Connection reestablished. I need to finish the download before I can override any systems."

"Then you better get it done fast, EDI." Shepard warned as the incoming platform docked alongside them and a group of, very much alive, Collectors swarmed them.

The platforms continuously moved around them as they fought, making aiming a hassle. Harbinger showed his face on a few occasions, spewing his taunts as they took down the avatars he chose. "THIS HURTS YOU!"

"Forty one percent complete," EDI chimed in.

Shepard groaned as another of her shots missed. She longed for her visor. "Come on, EDI speed it up."

"Another platform!" Garrus shouted from across the field. She realized how close she had gotten to the enemy when she spotted him a ways away, carefully sniping his targets from his cover.

One of Tali's drones sped past her to intercept a group of three husks that were making their shambling way toward Shepard. "YOUR ATTACKS ARE USELESS!" Harbinger boomed over it all. It was like a nightmare.

"Eighty four percent," EDI updated them. Her voice held a hint of stress.

"EDI, get us out of here!" Shepard shouted.

"I am simultaneously fighting Collector firewalls in over 8000 nodes. I am tasked to capacity," EDI snarked back.

"In other words, don't rush me," Garrus chuckled.

"ASSUMING CONTROL!"

Shepard glanced around and saw that in the hub bub, they had managed to take down every attacker except that one final Harbinger avatar. She threw a warp field at his barrier while he continued to taunt them. "Yeah, yeah, you're the Harbinger of our perfection. We get it," she snarled, vaulting over her cover to charge the glowing freak. Her shields took a hit as she impacted with the Collector. Garrus shouted her name as he stood and took aim.

"Shepard! Get down!" She immediately ducked, the avatar powering up one of his fiery attacks that would surely be the end of her. As soon as she was out of the way, the thing's head exploded from one of Garrus' high impact shots.

"Nice one!" She called, standing and waving to let him know she was okay. Her shields recharged and shuttered around her, making her feel much less vulnerable.

"I really wish you would stop doing that," Garrus grumbled over their private channel just as EDI announced she was finished her download.

"Shepard, you must manually reestablish my link to the Command Console," she chirped. Shepard made her way back to the platform that had dumped them and opened her omnitool to let EDI back in. Her usual globe like avatar appeared above the console. "I have regained control of the platform, Shepard."

"I knew you wouldn't let us down, EDI," Shepard sighed with a bit more confidence than she had actually felt during the fight.

"I always work at optimal capacity," EDI agreed smugly.

"Did you get what we needed?" Shepard asked as EDI piloted the platform up and away from the battle field.

"I found data that could help us successfully navigate the Omega 4 relay. I have also found the Turian distress call that served as the lure for this trap. The Collectors were the source. It is... unusual."

The platform latched on to the edge of a new pathway that Shepard guessed would allow them to find their way out. "Seems logical to me that they would have sent the initial message as bait," Shepard shrugged, not certain why EDI would find it unusual.

"No, it is unusual because Turian emergency channels have secondary encryption. It is corrupted in the message. It is not possible that the Illusive Man would believe the distress call was genuine." She explained.

With a confirmation nod from Garrus that her analysis was correct, Shepard asked, "Why are you so sure?"

"I found the anomaly with Cerberus detection protocols. He wrote them," she said with finality.

"He knew it was a trap?" Joker asked, confusion in his voice. "Why would he send us into a trap?"

"That son of a bitch sent us right into Collector hands!" Shepard growled, punching the console in frustration. She'd known something was wrong from the minute she'd seen the Illusive Man. Damn him.

"And here I thought I'd had my fill of betrayal and attempted murder for the year," Garrus sighed.

"We saw this coming, Shepard," Tali pointed out.

"Uh, Commander, we've got another problem," Joker interrupted. "The Collector ship is powering up. You need to get out of there before their weapons come online. I'm not losing another Normandy!"

"I do not have full control of their systems," EDI said with a small hint of frustration. "I will do what I can. Sending coordinates for shuttle extraction."

"Come on, let's move," Shepard took off, pistol at the ready, her team behind her.

The Collectors did what they could to waylay them. Each chamber they entered was crawling with the awful creatures. Harbinger was having a field day. EDI was opening doors for them as they went and as they came down a set of stairs into another wide open room that she informed them had an open door on the other side for them, Shepard panicked. The floor below was crawling with husks and floating just above was one of the giant metal crab like constructs like they'd fought off on Horizon. She was glad she had the insight to bring along the heavy weapon she'd looted from the Collector. Pulling it off her back, she hefted it and braced to shoot the big thing. Before she could get a shot off, she was being backed up the stairs by husks. She braced and threw a shockwave at them, knocking a group of them back and killing a couple, but they kept coming. Tali and Garrus weren't equipped for this much crowd control.

"Hey, Big Guy!" Shepard shouted. Garrus turned to face her, his helmet hiding his expression. "Take the big gun. I'll focus on the husks!" She held the gun out to him and he ran over to her to take it from her.

"Aww Shepard, and it isn't even my birthday," he said, excitement in his voice.

"Just take out that flying thing," she said, nudging him away and smiling as she released another shockwave to get the husks away from her. Tali took care of the Collectors and Garrus whittled down the floater as she handled the husks. Soon they had taken down all of the targets and Garrus reluctantly handed her back the plasma gun. "Don't worry," she said over the private channel as she hitched it to her back. "I'll get you something much sexier for your birthday."

"Hmm," he replied. "I dunno, Shepard. Not many things in this universe are as sexy as big guns."

She heard the tease in his voice as they approached the open door, but before she could reply, the door slammed closed, barring their way. "Uh EDI, we got a problem."

"A temporary set back. Rerouting... I have opened a door on the opposite wall," EDI said. Shepard heard the whoosh and behind them, a new door opened up.

Soon they recognized where they had come in at and a short fight through more Collectors, husks and Harbinger later, they were running for the shuttle. "Uh, Commander, I hate to rush you, but those weapons are about to come online," Joker said, panic edging into his tone. "Might wanna double time it. You know, so we can leave before they blow the Normandy in half."

"You heard the man!" Shepard shouted. "Everybody onto the Normandy! Move!" They piled into the shuttle and it took off to dock back in the Normandy's shuttle bay.

"Strap in people!" Joker shouted as they landed and Shepard dashed from the shuttle to the elevator. "Gonna make 'em work for it this time!" Shepard felt the Normandy shifting and turning as Joker pulled some evasive maneuvers. She could hear the Collector vessel firing on them. The sound was far too familiar. She raced to the bridge to watch out the windows as Joker piloted with precision. The large yellow beams continuously fired at them, missing and jetting far ahead into space at all angles. "EDI, I can't dodge this guy forever. Get us out of here!" Joker shouted.

"Specify a destination, Mr. Moreau," EDI chirped.

"Anywhere that's not here!" Joker said with sarcasm.

"Very well. Engaging Mass Effect core." The Normandy shot to FTL speed and the stars began to fly by in streaks. Shepard sighed in relief and patted Joker on the shoulder gently.

Her relief was indescribable. After Joker assured her that they had lost the Collectors when they jumped to FTL, she made her way up to her cabin to change. She hadn't even removed her helmet in her mad dash to the bridge. She slowly unclipped her armor in the elevator in the short climb up. When she stepped into her quarters, Garrus was waiting for her. "Hey, Big Guy. What's up?"

"I was just making sure you were okay. I know that it couldn't have been easy for you to have the Collectors firing on your ship after what happened last time," he shrugged, stepping closer to give her a short hug.

"Unnerving could be a suitable word for it," She agreed, accepting the hug and then continuing to unclip her armor. "What really grinds my gears is if the Illusive Man had told us it was a trap, we might have been ready."

She stripped off all her armor and tossed it aside while she noticed him trying not to notice. She carelessly displayed herself with a private smirk as she pulled a change of clothes from the dresser. Before she could even open her mouth to comment on the gentle purr that was rumbling his subvocals, Joker interrupted. "Call coming in from the Illusive Man, Commander. Figure you've got a few words for him too."

She sighed and slipped into her clothes, drawing a disappointed rumble from Garrus' throat as she gave him an apologetic look before heading to the comm room to give the Illusive Man a piece of her mind. "Shepard, looks like EDI extracted some interesting data before the Collector ship came back online." The Illusive man said, ignoring the icy glare and annoyed stance she was throwing in his direction.

"Cut the act! You set us up and you better have a damn good reason for it," she growled, getting angrier as he fixed her with a calm glare of his own.

"We needed information on the Omega 4 relay. That required direct access to Collector data. It was too good an opportunity to pass up."

She clenched her fists, speaking through gritted teeth. "Agreed, but I don't like surprises, especially when my ass is on the line."

"I put you at risk, yes," he flicked his cherry into the ashtray beside him and she wished she could knock it across the room. "But without that information, you don't reach the Collector homeworld, and you and every other human may as well be dead. It was a trap, but I was confident in your abilities." he stood to approach her. "And don't forget EDI. The Collectors couldn't have anticipated her."

"You could have told me the plan," Shepard seethed. "You say I'm important, but you sure try hard to get me killed."

He sighed. "I needed the Collectors to believe they had the upper hand. Telling you could have tipped them off in any number of ways, but besides I wouldn't have sent you in if I didn't think you could succeed."

"You have _one job,_ information. If I can't trust your intel, you're useless to me." She snapped.

"It's never that simple. You of all people should know that."

"I know that I'll be a lot more careful. With the Collectors and with you," she crossed her arms while he resumed his seat.

"This is no time for petty grudges. Things are about to get a _lot_ tougher. EDI confirmed our suspicions. The Reapers and Collector ships use an advanced identify friend/foe system that the relays recognize. All we need to do is get our hands on one of those IFFs."

Shepard sighed in frustration and snapped. "I was just on the ship. Why didn't you say anything about finding their IFF?"

"As I said, EDI just confirmed it. Besides, you wouldn't have had time to find and extract it, but we have options." He paused to flick his cigarette again and take a sip from his glass before listing those options. "An Alliance science team recently determined that the great rift on the Planet Clemdigan is actually an impact crater from a mass accelerator weapon. A very _old_ mass accelerator. I sent a team to either find the weapon or its target. They found both. The weapon was defunct but it helped us plot the flight path of the intended target. A 37 million year old derelict Reaper. We found it damaged and trapped in the gravity of a brown dwarf."

This was a huge find if it were true. "I saw what Sovereign did to the Citadel Fleet. Hard to imagine anything could stop something that powerful."

"This vessel is a relic from a battle waged while mammals took their first steps on Earth. There's no trace of the species that took the shot. Perhaps it was their one moment of defiance before being wiped out."

"I only believe you because I doubt you'd repeat yourself so soon," she grumbled, crossing her arms again.

"It's no less a risk, Shepard. We lost contact with Dr. Chandana's team, shortly after they boarded. Initial reconnaissance revealed no clues and it was too risky to commit more resources, but now we need that IFF. I'll forward the coordinates to Joker. In the meantime, I suggest you tell your crew I didn't risk their lives unnecessarily. It will make things easier going forward."

Shepard turned around, ready to be done with him and his speeches. "EDI, tell the crew to assemble. We've got a lot to talk about."

"Of course Shepard," the AI complied as the Illusive Man shut down the channel.

* * *

 

"So the Illusive Man didn't sell us out," Jacob said, his arms crossed and a disbelieving look on his face after Shepard had explained to everyone what the Illusive Man had told her. "Could have fooled me." The tension was high in the room. She could almost taste it.

"Lied to us, used us, needed access to the Collector databanks. Necessary risk," Mordin sniffed.

Jack scoffed and got up, dismissing herself and calling over her shoulder. "I told you not to trust him, Shepard." Zaeed wasn't far behind, having heard the story and obviously not interested in being part of the rest of the conversation.

"He tries something like that again, and the Collectors will be the least of his problems," Shepard vowed, pacing back and forth with the indecision of what to do next. "EDI are you sure this IFF is gonna work?"

"My analysis is accurate, Shepard. I have also determined the approximate location of the Collector Homeworld based on navigational data from their vessel." Her globe like avatar was replaced by a replication of the galaxy map and she zoomed in on a system dead center of the map.

"That can't be right," Miranda said with a frown.

"It's right. EDI doesn't make mistakes," Shepard said, staring at the map while she felt Garrus' eyes boring into her back.

"My calculations are correct. The Collector Homeworld is located somewhere within the galactic core," EDI confirmed.

"Impossible. There's nothing there but black holes and exploding suns," Tali pointed out. "There are no habitable planets there."

"Could be an artificial construction. Space station protected by powerful mass effect fields and radiation shields," Mordin guessed.

"Even the Collectors don't have that kind of technology," Miranda said doubtfully.

"The Collectors are just servants of our real enemy and we've all seen what their masters are capable of. They built the mass relays and the Citadel. Who's to say they can't build a space station surrounded by black holes." Shepard sighed. "No wonder nobody's ever returned from a trip through the Omega 4 mass relay."

"The logical conclusion is that a small safe zone exists on the far side of the relay. A region where ships can survive. Standard relay transit protocols would not allow safe transport. Drift of several thousand kilometers is common and would be fatal in the galactic core," EDI explained. "The Reaper IFF must trigger the relay to use more advanced encrypted protocols."

"Just because we can follow the Collectors through the relay doesn't mean we can take them out. I don't wanna go after them until I know we're ready," Shepard insisted.

"Sooner or later, we need that IFF. I say why wait?" Jacob countered. That was easy for him to say. He'd already dealt with his emotional baggage. There were still some of the team who she had barely been able to talk with, let alone help them settle their unfinished business and get them focused. She glanced at Samara and Thane, her most recent people. Samara who radiated the confidence of her almost 1000 years of life had been very upset while they were speaking before the interruption of the trap. She was still getting to know Thane, but he was opening up one story at a time.

"It's a derelict Reaper," Miranda said with a sneer at Jacob. "What if the Collectors are waiting for us? We may want to build up our team before we take that kind of risk."

For once, Shepard was surprised Miranda was on her side. "I agree. We need to build up the team."

"It's your choice, Commander. Whatever you decide, we're with you," Jacob said.

She dismissed everyone, leaning on the conference table to gather her thoughts. She felt Garrus beside her, lending his presence. "I'm not convinced this is a good idea," she sighed.

"It's a terrible idea," he agreed with a chuckle. "I mean come on. A derelict Reaper? Shepard, this is definitely suspicious." He was silent for a moment while he hummed at his decision. "But it seems like it may be necessary."

She nodded her agreement. "I never thought I would be voluntarily walking into a Reaper."

"At least you don't need to act right away. Give it some time and some thought." He placed a supportive palm on her shoulder blade. "The damn thing's been floating there for 37 million years. What's a few weeks?"

She snorted and stood up straight. "Thanks, Big Guy. I think what I need now is a cup of coffee and to make my rounds. It'll... relieve some stress."

She left before the hum he answered with drove her bonkers.

 


	22. Closure and Shore Leave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard builds up the team before heading into the Reaper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mention of a rape situation in passing.

Shepard had made a point to get the rest of the story about Morinth from Samara as soon as possible. Samara revealed that the 'Ardat Yakshi' was not only an extremely powerful biotic, but her estranged daughter. Shepard found herself trying to comfort the woman and receiving a brush off. "Do not pity me Shepard, I do not accept it."

"So have you tracked that ship information I got for you?" Shepard asked, feeling a crushing in her chest at the distress of the other woman.

"Morinth has arrived on Omega." The Justicar paused, gathering herself. "I would very much appreciate if you might offer assistance in bringing her to justice."

Shepard, of course, agreed. They made their way to Omega and Shepard found herself following the Justicar as she glided through the disgusting streets, making Omega just a little bit less ugly. Aria distractedly informed them that Morinth's latest victim had been a young girl that lived near the market district. They made their way to the apartment and Shepard comforted the mother of the victim as they gleaned information from the woman.

A short investigation of the girl's belongings later, Shepard found herself being offered up as bait. Morinth, according to Samara, was attracted to creative people with a spark. "What makes you think she'll go after me?" Shepard asked her as they made their way through the market toward Afterlife's VIP section.

"You are an artist on the battlefield, Shepard," Samara offered the high praise. "You have the vital spark that will attract Morinth, but you must be careful, because as you hunt her, she will be hunting you. Morinth's condition makes her nearly irresistible to her prey once she decides to strike."

"Lovely," Shepard commented just before approaching the bouncer. After she dropped the name they'd gotten from the dead girl's diary that would get her into the VIP section, the guard was more than willing to let her pass.

A change into her civvies was in order and she hurriedly jogged back to the Normandy to change while Samara found the place she would wait until Shepard drew Morinth from the club. When she came back, dressed in a comfortable yet revealing outfit, Samara beckoned her over and warned her one last time before she went in.

Shepard was nervous. She remembered what the draw of an Asari could do. If Morinth was a souped up biotic and a sexy killing machine, she could be in over her head. She made her way through the poorly lit room, picking fights and helping out those who looked like they might need it. She made herself as conspicuous as she could, hoping to draw Morinth's attention. Finally as she was about to give up, thinking the Ardat Yakshi might not even be there, she was approached by a woman who was undoubtedly Morinth. The Asari was the spitting image of her mother. She fabricated her own personality to make sure Morinth liked her, saying things she would never say as the woman prompted her. Finally, Morinth invited her to 'get out of here', and Shepard followed her out of the noisy club and into the streets of Omega.

She was led to a fancy apartment the likes of which she didn't know existed on Omega. Shepard nervously searched around the apartment, asking Morinth questions about her belongings and hoping to buy herself some time until Samara arrived. She was finally forced to sit and make conversation. She situated herself between the door and Morinth as far from the woman as she could get. The hair on her arms stood up every time Morinth opened her mouth, her voice dripping with promise. The Asari came closer and closer, and Shepard pulled herself together, shaking off the pull of the Ardat Yakshi's power. She managed to stare the woman down as she attempted to draw answers from Shepard, her eyes switching to black pools of power and ecstasy.

Finally, Samara rode in like the cavalry and as the two Asari battled it out, the apartment exploding with biotics, Shepard leaned on the side of the couch, gasping to reign in her hormones. Morinth went so far as to try and get Shepard to betray Samara, but Shepard wasn't stupid. No way was she letting Morinth on her ship in place of Samara. She grabbed the Ardat Yakshi's arm and forced her biotics down so Samara could knock her to the floor. Samara glowed with her rage and pain as she straddled her daughter and caved her skull in with a powerful biotic punch. Begging to leave, Samara refused to allow Shepard to comfort her, yet again. They walked in silence back to the Normandy. Shepard hugged herself as she tried to shake off the frenzy that the sexual predator had stirred up in her and watched Samara. She didn't think the warrior had it in her to slouch, but Samara was nearly dragging her feet as they walked. Shepard didn't know if she could ever kill her own daughter if it came down to it. It was a terrible situation, one that she had no answers for.

When she brought herself to speak with Samara later that evening, the woman had smiled beatifically and threw her arms out to encompass the observation window before her. " I am free. For the first time in 400 years. I am a ruined vessel of sorrow and regret, but I am free. Thank you, Shepard."

* * *

 

Shepard had needed to occupy her mind and her hands after the encounter with Morinth. She busied herself in her cabin with one of her model ships and even feverishly warned Garrus away when he'd offered to bring her dinner. The chuckle he'd let out over the comm as he logged off had nearly jerked her from her seat and down to the battery. She was almost glad when Tali called her over the comm and asked to speak with her.

She found out that the Quarian Admiralty Board had informed Tali that she was being tried with treason. The girl fidgeted and wrung her hands as she described the process to Shepard. Shepard grabbed her small three fingered hands and held them still, offering comforting words. "We'll get this sorted out," she promised.

The hearing they'd prepared for Tali upon her arrival had turned into them ambushing her with the news that she had been stripped of her ship name and her father's ship had been taken over by Geth. Shepard, who'd been appointed Tali's captain/spokesman demanded they be allowed to go to the ship and see if there was anyone left worth saving. She, Tali and Garrus plowed through the Alarei looking for clues as to what had happened. The Geth were all over the ship and Tali not only found her father dead, but she found information that implicated that he was responsible for the Geth coming back online.

She begged Shepard not to tell the other Admirals that her father was responsible and Shepard couldn't say no to the sniffling Quarian. She felt responsible for the girl. They'd become so close. She prepared her speech in her mind as they flew back to the Rayya, determined to get Tali out of her charges without using the evidence they'd collected. When they returned, the Admirals had already begun to bicker over whether they had survived or not. It had only been a few hours. "Sorry we're late," Tali said with bitterness as they approached the dais.

"Tali'Zorah Vas Normandy saved the Alarei. I hope this proves her loyalty to the Quarian people," Shepard said.

"Her loyalty was never in doubt, only her judgement," Admiral Gerrel said.

"Perhaps Tali'Zorah can give us something to encourage more trust in her judgement," Admiral Raan suggested.

"Did you find anything on the Alarei that could clarify what happened there?" Gerrel said a bit more softly.

Tali glanced over at her and Shepard narrowed her eyes, stepping forward to speak. "Shepard, please..." Tali begged one last time.

"Does Captain Shepard have any new evidence to submit to this hearing?" Raan asked gently.

"Tali helped me defeat Saren and the Geth at the Citadel. That should be all the evidence you need." Shepard said in defense of her friend. "But if you want more, I can present the Normandy, which Tali also saved from Geth forces, even though it's too quiet for her to sleep well."

"We still don't know what happened on the Alarei," Gerrel insisted.

"No, Admiral. You don't, but you gave her _my_ name. I'm her captain. I trust her with my life, and I'm telling you that she's innocent."

"And we should just trust this human's opinion?" a third admiral spoke up.

Gerrel spoke again. "We placed Tali's life in the human's hands. Would you doubt those words if they came from a Quarian captain?"

"No," the third said reluctantly. "Based on the rest of the evidence... I suppose that I wouldn't."

After a short pause where all of the Admirals exchanged glances, Raan said, "Are the Admirals prepared to render judgement?" All four admirals raised their omnitools and silently cast their vote. After reading her own omnitool, Raan said, "Tali'Zorah. In light of your history of service, we do not find sufficient evidence to convict." Shepard's racing heart slowed as she breathed a silent breath of relief. "You are cleared of all charges." She glanced at Tali as the girl looked relieved as well, then Raan addressed her. "Commander Shepard, please accept these gifts in appreciation for you taking the time to represent one of our people."

Accepting the transfer to her Omnitool, she said, "With all due respect admiral, I didn't represent one of your people. I represented one of mine."

"So you did, Shepard," Gerrel said with a nod.

"This hearing is concluded. Go in peace, Tali'Zorah Vas Normandy. Keelah se'lai," Raan said.

The crowd in the garden where the trial was held began to disperse and Tali pulled Shepard to the side. "I can't believe you pulled that off. What you said.... I've never had anyone speak like that on my behalf. Thank you for being there for my father and me, even when... Thank you."

"We can still go back in and get you exiled, if you want," Shepard offered with a smile that was hidden by her helmet, but Tali could surely see in her eyes.

Tali chuckled. "Thanks, but I'm fine with things like this. It's fun watching you shout."

"Come on Tali'Zorah _Vas Normandy._ Let's get back to our ship," she said with her own chuckle and a pat of Tali's shoulder.

* * *

 

Shepard was running her rounds as usual. She was just about to go check in on Samara when Thane approached her in his usual 'appear out of nowhere' manner. "Shepard, may I have a word?"

"Of course, Thane. Something on your mind?" She asked as he began to lead her back toward his usual place in the Life Support room.

"I have been on your ship for quite some time and I have placed myself in the background, making sure that I had the measure of your entire team. I have noticed in my time that you have made it a point to do many missions that are out of the way of your most pressing mission, the Collectors. These have all been very personal favors for each person on your crew..." He spoke very formally and Shepard was hoping he was going to open up to her about something. He was rarely willing to give her much about himself.

She nodded. "This is going to be a pretty rough mission. Now that we know where we're going, I really want to make sure that everyone has their lives sorted out on a personal level, so they can be at their best and maybe we'll all make it out alive." She said, afraid to reach out to him like she would some of the others. He was so closed off.

He smiled at her, tilting his head and studying her. "You genuinely care about everyone on this ship."

"I don't really have a home outside of the Normandy," she shrugged. "My crew is my family. I don't want to lose my family."

He looked away, an old pain surfacing on his face. "I've lost family. I believe I understand."

"I'm sorry, Thane. May I ask, who did you lose?" she said softly, not wishing to push too hard.

"My wife, Irikah." He was quiet for a time, not meeting Shepard's eyes. There was nothing she could say that wouldn't sound like a platitude so she allowed him his moment. "Now I fear that I may be in danger of losing our son."

"You have a son?" Shepard asked, more shocked that he had a child than his mention of a wife.

"I have not had contact with him for many years, but since my diagnosis, I have been looking back on my life and making sure that I am righting all of the wrongs I have done in my time. Abandoning Kolyat is one of my greatest wrongs," he admitted.

"Why do you think you are going to lose him?"

"I made an effort to track him down after I joined your crew. I have information that says he has become 'disconnected'. He does what his body wills."

"I'm sorry, I don't understand." She said, hoping he would explain.

Thankfully he was willing to appease her. He told her a little bit about Drell beliefs and what he meant by his son being 'disconnected'. Apparently Kolyat was on the Citadel and he had taken a job as a hitman. Somehow the young Drell had found out what his father was and the apple wasn't falling far from the tree. That was definitely something Shepard could handle.

 

* * *

 

They made for the Citadel. Along the way Shepard was forced to talk down a fight between Jack and Miranda that had been brewing for some time. The two biotics in a fight was something Shepard could have done without. She was beginning to get nervous. The big showdown was growing closer. After she handled Thane's son, she planned on taking a team into the Derelict Reaper to pick up its IFF and then it was off to the Collector Homeworld.

"You need a night off, Shepard," Garrus suggested after he found her pacing the shuttle bay the night before they were set to reach the Citadel.

"I can't Garrus. This is it. After I help Thane, I have nothing left to distract me. We need to set the endgame in motion if you catch my drift," she sighed, running hands through her hair.

He stopped her by holding an arm out in front of her and pulling her against him. "You need to unwind. While we're on the Citadel, why don't you call a night of shore leave. I think everyone could use the break. The ship smells like nerves," he said with a small chuckle.

She sighed, resting her head on his shoulder. "You're right. As usual. After we save Thane's son from himself, we'll take a day and let everyone have some wind down time."

"That's my girl," he purred, petting her hair. "You know, most of the vids I've watched portray human females as stubborn creatures that never admit to being wrong."

"Yeah, well I think you'll find that I don't really fit into the stereotypical mold."

"I think I knew that about you," he chuckled.

* * *

 

Saving Thane's son was ridiculously easy. All she needed to do was beat up a few people for information, and follow a politician from a catwalk. Shepard actually felt a little bit cheated. After they returned to the Normandy, Shepard waited a few hours out of respect for Thane and then made the announcement that they were taking shore leave for the night.

Purgatory was the agreed upon meet up spot. It had actually been Jack of all people that suggested they all go drinking together. "You wanna know your people, get them drunk," she had said with a shrug.

Shepard was the third person to show. Jack and Kelly were already at a table. Kelly waved her over and she went to sit down. She didn't recognize Jack at first because the girl had actually pulled on a skin tight leather tank top to replace her usual leather strap that served as a shirt. "Jack, I'm surprised. You look good," Shepard said, ordering a beer from a passing Asari waitress.

"Fuck you, Shepard," Jack responded with a smirk before downing a shot of something that smelled toxic.

Shepard chuckled. The rest of the crew all slowly began to filter in. She was surprised to see that everyone actually showed up. Even Samara who remained silent, sipping on a glass of wine at the edge of the party.

Joker got them started on a game of never have I ever and soon enough, Shepard was having trouble feeling her face. "You've seen as much goddamn shit as I have, Shepard," Zaeed said, swaying in his seat.

"It's my turn," Miranda slurred, raising her glass. Everyone quieted down and she smirked, glancing at Shepard. "Never have I ever slept with an alien."

Shepard glanced around the table as Jack, Jacob, Samara, Kasumi, and Kelly all took a drink from their respective glasses. Shepard laughed and left her glass resolutely on the table, refusing to count the non-consensual Batarian on Mindoir. "Oh, Come on, Shepard!" Jack said way out loud. "You too Garrus! There is no way you two haven't been all up in each other's business."

Were they that obvious? She shook her head, flushing and Tali giggled and hiccuped. "It's trueee!" The Quarian said.

"I happen to be a gentleman," Garrus said sitting a bit straighter in his seat and brushing away the awkward conversation with grace. He really was smooth when he wanted to be. He glanced across the table at her and tipped his glass with a wink.

She couldn't help biting her lip as she fought the urge to climb over the table and jump him right there. Kelly snickered and Grunt let out a deep 'he he he' as he took a gulp of his bucket of whatever he was drinking. "Does that make you a virgin in that brand new body, Shep?" Kasumi asked teasingly.

"This is not a topic of conversation we should be having!" Shepard said, burying her face in her palms and groaning as her voice had come out a bit more shrilly than she'd have liked.

"I believe it is my turn," Thane said, mercifully taking the heat off of her. She thanked him with her eyes and he nodded discreetly. By closing time, they needed to drag out Grunt, and Garrus as the second strongest carried Tali out. She hiccuped and giggled all of the way back to the Normandy. How she had managed to get drunk through her suit, Shepard would never understand. Shepard was stumbling herself and Thane swooped in generously to let her lean on him. Everyone crammed into the elevator to go to their respective floors. Garrus carried Tali to her cot in engineering and Zaeed and Jack (with help from her biotics) dragged Grunt to his place.

Thane made certain that Shepard was alright on her own before leaving her when they hit the crew deck. She thanked him for the help and he bowed as he backed out. She was left with Joker, Mordin and Jacob. "Do you sleep in your pilot's chair?" she asked, leaning her swimming head back on the cool metal wall of the elevator.

"It's a really comfortable chair," he said snarkily. She stuck her tongue out at him and he chuckled. "Goodnight, Commander."

Jacob and Mordin left her by herself in the elevator and she fought to stay standing until she could get to her bed. "EDI, could you please unlock my door. Apparently it was a problem last time."

"Of course, Shepard," EDI purred. When she got to her room, Shepard stripped off her top layer of clothes and fell into her bed in just her underwear. She was swimming in and out of sleep when her door chirped softly. "Mr. Vakarian is requesting entry," EDI said softly.

"C'min," she mumbled and EDI unlocked the door again. Garrus strolled in and walked over to her.

Kneeling beside the edge of the bed she was closest to, he stroked her hair. "You alright, Shepard?"

"Mmhmm," she managed before she felt him pull the blankets up over her. "D'you get Tali..." she started.

"Taken care of," he said, his voice soft.

"Stay?" she asked, attempting to roll off her stomach.

"If you insist," he agreed, his weight shifting the bed as he joined her. He pulled her closer, nuzzling her hair and he whispered. "Good night, Shepard."

 


	23. Eye of the Hurricane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An unexpected ally turns up in the bowels of a millions of years dead Reaper.

Shepard jogged to the bridge, careful of her footing on the violently quaking ship. She was already in full armor, as they approached the derelict Reaper that supposedly housed the IFF they needed to get safely through the Omega 4 relay. "What's with all the chop, Joker?" she demanded, grabbing a hold of the back of his seat to maintain her balance.

"I'm doing my best, but the wind's gusting at 500 kph." They zipped closer to the massive machine that floated ominously in the gravity of the Brown Dwarf. "There's a second ship alongside the Reaper. It's not transmitting any IFF, but the ladar paints its silhouette as Geth.

She sighed, "I guess we know why the science team stopped reporting in." Suddenly all of the shaking stopped and the Normandy was flying smooth as ever. "What just happened?"

Joker fiddled with a few buttons. "The Reaper's mass effect fields are still active. We just passed inside their envelope. Eye of the Hurricane, huh?" His voice was both sarcastic and concerned.

Shepard left the bridge with a half grin and a shake of her head. Choosing her team was difficult. She really wanted to bring Jack along in case there were husks, but the possibility of Geth really made her want a tech expert as well. She fidgeted on her way down to the shuttle bay in the elevator and finally decided. She knew Garrus was already waiting for her and between her omnitool and his, she figured they would be enough to take care of the Geth if they got rowdy. She opened her comm. "Thane. Meet us in the shuttle bay. You're coming along."

"Of course, Siha," he replied with his new favorite nickname for her. She figured that between his precision shooting and his biotics that they would be set for anything.

Once they'd landed on the Reaper, Shepard shuddered at the strange feeling that settled over her. She'd not felt so odd since the Reaper artifact at the Project base. Spending a lot of time here was a bad idea. "Let's move," she said, readying her shotgun and jogging into the small prefab unit that the Cerberus team had set up to work out of.

"Exploring an abandoned area, expecting something mechanical and nasty to jump out at any moment. Just like old times," Garrus sighed, picking up on her anxiety.

The signs were not easing her mind. Almost as soon as they walked in, there was a smear of blood across the wall facing her. She shuddered and took the left turn to head further into the base. The lab area was empty and she moved to a console to try and access the logs from the science team. Nothing looked good. The logs spoke of strange angles and uneasy feelings. It was just how she remembered Benezia describing the inside of Sovereign. "It was indoctrinating them," she scowled.

"Can it do that after it's been dead for 37 million years?" Garrus asked, stepping a little closer. She could read his tension in the stiffness of his shoulders.

"Joker did say that it's mass effect fields were still active," she shrugged. "We should be extra careful once we're inside. I can feel it trying to worm its way in."

They headed toward the airlock and nearly as soon as they stepped in and the door closed behind them, there was a wave of energy that shook the ground they were standing on. Garrus placed a hand on her back to steady her and Joker called out over the comms. "Normandy to shore party!"

"What just happened?" she asked, seeing the red interface behind them that locked them inside the dead Reaper.

"The Reaper put up kinetic barriers. I don't think we can get through from our side." Joker reported.

"Dammit," she cursed.

"We're trapped. How disquieting," Thane commented, brushing off his sleeves as if the incident left him feeling dirty. She couldn't blame him.

"The Normandy's got guns, use 'em," she said to Joker, really not liking that they were essentially locked inside a Reaper and getting closer and closer to Indoctrination as they stood around. Her ears were ringing already.

"The Normandy lacks the necessary firepower," EDI helpfully pointed out. "Reaper shields are impervious to dreadnought fire. Shepard, a Kinetic barrier can only be produced by a mass effect generator. That is true for any ship. Even a Reaper. At the moment of activation, I detected a heat spike in what is likely the wreck's mass effect core. Sending the coordinates now." Shepard's omnitool pinged. "Be advised: this core is also maintaining the Reaper's altitude."

"So when we take the barriers down to escape, the wreck falls into the planet core," Shepard translated, rolling her eyes.

"And that means everyone dies," Joker helpfully added. "Yeah, I got it."

She sighed. "We'll make a sweep for survivors and research data. Then we'll knock this ugly piece of crap out of the sky. Be ready to pick us up. Being crushed in the heart of a brown dwarf is not on today's agenda."

"Aye, aye. Good hunting," Joker replied and then closed the comm.

She shuddered once more. "Alright, I'm not risking indoctrination for nothing. Let's make sure we find that IFF before we blow the core." She said, taking off, her pace fast.

Garrus kept up easily, but she noticed she was leaving Thane behind. She slowed and tried to take a breath and calm herself. They came across more streaks of blood and many bodies that barely resembled humans anymore. Shepard's stomach flipped as she imagined what it must have been like, trapped in there, dying at the hands of God knew what. The inside of the Reaper was massive. Catwalks snaked here and there as if it were designed to have organics living inside it. She couldn't say that made her feel any better. The science team had spread their equipment all throughout the place. Here and there she was able to access more audio logs. After the third one, she couldn't listen anymore. The team had slowly been turned into drooling lunatics. Her hands were shaking and it was warmer than it should have been inside her armor. "Shepard, your heart rate is off the charts," Garrus whispered to her so Thane would not be privy.

"I can feel it Garrus. We need to get out of here, fast," she said, trying to calm herself. She started to walk faster again and she was almost caught off guard by a husk that appeared out of nowhere to her right. "Jesus!" she panicked and took the shot loaded in the chamber of her shotgun. The husk flew back and she glanced around for more.

"They're coming up from below!" Garrus shouted, abandoning his sniper rifle for his assault rifle so he could do more damage faster. She spun to make sure the two of them were handling themselves and called her biotics. She threw shockwave after shockwave at the approaching husks, backing up toward the others as she did so. Each time a husk evaded her biotics and got too close, she was forced to hit it with her shotgun. The waves felt endless. Where had they all come from? The place had been so quiet. When the dreadful noises of ragged broken throats finally stopped, she spun around, sighting every angle to be certain they were all gone. "That's it for now, I think," Garrus said.

"I _hate_ this place," she spat, refusing to put her shotgun away. She kept her biotics ready too. The soothing tingle just below the surface of her skin, coupled with Garrus' subharmonics rumbling protectively at her side made her feel just a tiny bit better. "Come on."

She started forward cautiously, not wanting to rush forward again and get caught off guard a second time. As they headed for a left turn at the top of an incline, Shepard noticed a few husks ahead to her left. She lifted her shotgun to take aim, but they fell beneath two quick sniper shots. "Sniper!" Garrus shouted, warning her to stay back. She stopped dead in her tracks, glancing around to see if there were any more husks. Thane held up a hand and proceeded forward around the turn. When he didn't take fire, Shepard followed him up. "I couldn't see the shooter. A survivor from the science team?" Garrus said, cautiously following behind.

The next open area was full of more husks. Shepard took advantage of some explosive barrels in the area by shooting into them and taking out a few larger groups before they could rush them. She pointed Garrus and Thane at the larger Scion toward the far end of the room that continuously threw a freezing shockwave at them, decimating their shields. It was a heavily armored son of a bitch and she let them hit it with everything they had while she took out the smaller, scurrying bastards that tried to flank them. "I am really getting tired of these fuckers!" she growled as she felt herself nearly maxing the capacity of her biotics. If they would stop coming at them for a minute, she could recharge and cool down her amp. She silently wished she had brought Jack along.

"I believe that is the last of them," Thane said as she threw one last shockwave into a small approaching group and they flew up and over the side of the catwalk and down into the abyss below.

"Finally," she sighed, shaking out her hand as her biotics tingled a bit warmer than they should.

"We've seen these before, Shepard." Garrus said, pointing to the massive spikes that stood up across the chasm. "Dragon's Teeth your people call them. The Geth used them on Eden Prime."

"There are tales of such things among my people. Devices buried on distant worlds that turn the finders into abominations," Thane said thoughtfully as he stepped closer to the edge.

She glanced around. "See how the room's arranged? They treated this thing like some kind of altar." She stepped closer as well to get a better look below.

"It does look like that, but why would they want this to happen?" Garrus asked, disgust in his voice.

"You heard the logs. They were seeing things. Hearing things. They were being indoctrinated," she felt herself moving toward the spikes. The ringing in her ears was louder as she approached. Suddenly, something wrapped around her ankle and pulled her off balance. She cried out as she felt herself being pulled under the rail and off the platform.

"Shepard!" Garrus shouted, throwing himself to the floor and grabbing her hand. She clutched his fingers as he pulled her back. She kicked at the husk's hand as it held tightly to her ankle, still trying to pull her away. As soon as her boot dislodged the grasping thing from her ankle, Thane's rifle shot resounded around them. Garrus pulled her away from the edge and into his arms. "Spirits," he whispered, his voice shaky.

She clung to him for a moment as the fear and adrenaline spiked her heart and nearly had her hyperventilating. Once she'd caught her breath, she swallowed and patted his chest. He let her go and stood, then gave her a hand up. Making certain the husk hadn't injured her, she tested her ankle by putting weight on it. It felt fine enough and she thanked whoever was listening. She took one final glance at the spikes and said, "We can't help these people now, but we won't let the machines use their corpses like this."

"Agreed," Thane said with a nod.

Taking one last breath, she released Garrus' hand and started back toward the doorway she'd seen as they fought the husks. She shakily bypassed the lock, allowing her mind to focus on the task at hand instead of the terrifying experience she'd just been through. If Garrus hadn't grabbed her, that husk would have pulled her over the edge with no problem. As they passed into the airlock, the science team's VI helpfully informed them that they had gone 5 days without a workplace death. "Charming," she quipped, attempting to bury her fears and concerns.

"Safety is everyone's concern," Garrus mocked the VI.

She chuckled, but her heart wasn't in it. She needed off this Reaper. When the airlock door opened, they passed through into a large open area much like the previous room. She signaled her team to fan out and make sure there were no surprises waiting for them. As the others moved away, she felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up and before she could even react, two bullets whizzed past her head to smack into something fleshy behind her. She spun to see a third husk approaching but it went down to a third bullet. The threats gone, she turned to find the shooter. Her chin nearly hit the ground with her surprise to see a Geth standing up on some nearby high ground. It studied her with its flashlight cocked to the side. As she sized it up, it spoke "Shepard Commander." After acknowledging her, it turned and casually walked away, disappearing further into the Reaper.

"The Geth was the sniper. I thought Geth didn't speak..." Thane commented, bringing her own confusion to a head. The most she'd ever heard from a Geth was it's scream as it died under the Mako's tires. They usually weren't chatty creatures.

"Since when do Geth operate alone? They get smarter the more of them there are." Garrus said, his voice betraying his annoyance at the change in rules.

"What I'd like to know is why it a) knew who I was, and b) didn't attack us on sight. We aren't exactly friendly with the Geth," she mused before they were set upon by another slew of husks.

The entire way through the Reaper corpse was more of the same. She was going to need a long hot shower and a nap to calm her biotics by the time they got back to the Normandy. _If you get back_. Garrus kept a close eye on her, sensing that she was struggling. His subharmonics betrayed his concern. She continuously flashed him halfhearted smiles to convey she appreciated his concern, but as long as they hurried, she could fight the Reaper's influence. When they came to the final airlock before the mass effect core's coordinates, Shepard was relieved to see the IFF they had done all of this to get sitting out in the open on top of a dead console. "So the science team _did_ recover it," Thane said as she picked it up and secured it in a pouch on her belt.

"At least this wasn't all for nothing. Now let's get the hell out of here. The core is through this door," she said leading on.

There was a barrier blocking their access, and as she touched it, trying to understand what it was made from and how she could bring it down, it gave her a small shock. "Gee, Shepard, some things really don't change." Garrus said with a smile. "You just have to touch every barrier you come across and they always bite."

She shrugged, spotting the strange Geth inside the room on the other side of the barrier. It was interfacing with a console beside what she assumed was the mass effect core. It turned its flashlight briefly toward them and the barrier fell. "Hmm." She was suspicious as to why it kept helping them. She stepped across the barrier and saw that it was quickly being overrun by more husks. After it inputted something into the console, it spun to shoot a few of the husks that were creeping up behind, but it was too late. The Geth fell to the ground and the protective metallic casing around the core sprang open.

Shepard wasted no time. She pulled her grenade launcher from her back and fired at the core. Two grenades hit, damaging the core, but the casing closed again as the 'dead' Reaper fought back. Husks swarmed them and Shepard kept them at bay as best she could with her shockwaves as Garrus and Thane sniped, as fast as they could, the ones she couldn't reach. She needed to get to the core and get the casing re-opened. As soon as she had that thought, whatever program the Geth had fed to the system forced the core open again. Shepard fired off some more grenades in between shockwaves before the casing closed again. She growled in frustration and waded her way through the pile of husk corpses amassing at their feet. She made her way to the console and trusting Garrus and Thane to keep her clear added her own hacking skills to the Geth's program to bring the casing open one last time. Then she jammed her omnitool down on the console to fry the system and keep it permanently open. Satisfied, she backed up a few feet and took down the core with four more grenades.

As if the husks knew what was happening, the droves that had been coming at them suddenly stopped and scurried back to whatever hidey holes they came from. Shepard looked down at the Geth lying inert on the floor at her feet. It had helped her. Why? "Shepard! That Geth, I think we should bring it. It's behavior was... strange," Thane suggested as the Reaper began to shake as it lost its hold on the gravity.

"Leave it! We have enough trouble!" Garrus pleaded, simply wanting to get her out of there before they crashed into the Dwarf.

Shepard glanced around at the husks who were starting to reappear under the Reaper's influence. "Tali said no one's ever captured a Geth intact."

"You know the risk. That's all I'm going to say," Garrus drove his point home, not willing to argue in their short amount of time.

She agreed that they had no time so she knelt to grab one of its arms. "Come on, let's go."

In spite of his disagreement, Garrus grabbed the opposite arm and helped her to heft the heavy Geth. They slipped their helmets on quickly and she radioed for Joker to swing around and meet them. "Hang on folks!" He shouted as she and Garrus dragged the thing back to where she had spotted an open space as they fought through earlier.

"Open the port side airlock," she called over the comm as Joker pulled the Normandy up by the side as close as he could. The door on the side of the ship lifted and she and Garrus tossed the Geth into the gravity empty space between them and the Normandy. It floated gently into the airlock and she pretended she wasn't going to have to jump to get away herself. Thane followed the Geth, jumping from the edge and letting the lack of gravity carry him safely to the open airlock. "Go!" she shouted, shooting at some husks that were getting too close for comfort while Garrus shot her a wide eyed look. He looked ready to toss her himself when she let loose a shockwave toward the approaching husks. "I said Go!" she shoved him away and he growled in annoyance, but did as he was ordered. One more shockwave and she turned to see him safely in the airlock with Thane. She measured the distance and swallowed the lump of fear lodged in her throat as she backed up to make the jump. She tried not to think as she took the running leap toward the Normandy. She fell into Garrus' waiting arms and he hugged her to him while he slammed the button to the airlock closed. "We're clear!" she shouted to Joker. "Get us out of here!"

She could hardly breathe as the fear slowly dissipated. Thane watched them closely as Garrus' subharmonics talked her down from the brink. He had yet to let her go. "I swear I was ready to toss you myself," Garrus said gently.

"I know," she managed to chuckle. "For a split second I thought you might need to."

"It's a good thing you made me go first. That would have been embarrassing," he teased, the tension easing away as they flew far from the falling Reaper.

"I'll say," she snorted. She finally felt comfortable enough to pull away from his embrace. She glanced down at the Geth and said, "Let's store this thing somewhere while I figure out what to do with it."

Garrus helped her carry the inactive Geth to the AI core behind the med bay. Carry was actually generous. The thing was extremely heavy and they more like dragged it there. After a quick debriefing with Miranda and Jacob about the IFF and what to do with the Geth, Shepard let the decision hang unanswered while she took some time to think about it.

* * *

 

Shepard had showered, done her rounds and attempted to shake off the slimy feeling that the derelict Reaper had left her with. Several of the crew had voiced their opinions for or against reactivating the Geth. It seemed like the general consensus was either sell it to Cerberus or space it, as Jacob had suggested. Her opinion was a bit different. The thing had a piece of N7 armor strapped to it's chest and it had attempted to talk with them. She felt driven to know what it wanted. It had saved their lives in a way. Something was odd and she needed to know.

She was lying in her bed late in the night cycle and in spite of the day she'd had, she couldn't sleep. Two decks below her, answers slept in the AI core. She threw her covers off and pulled some clothes on. A quick elevator ride down and she was standing outside the AI core, fidgeting with indecision. Just as she had felt with Grunt still inside his tank, she felt the need to know exactly what she was dealing with. It wasn't fair to space the damn thing without even finding out what it wanted.

She entered the AI core and a lone guard had been stationed to watch the Geth. He stood at attention as she entered and she said, "I'm turning this thing back on. Be ready."

With an affirmative from the guard, she lifted her arm to bring up her omnitool. She set up a barrier around the area to keep the Geth contained when it woke. "I have isolated our systems and erected additional firewalls," EDI chirped, startling Shepard for a moment. "I am prepared to resist any hacking attempt."

Shepard nodded, gathering her wits and began her hacking programs on her omnitool that might jump start the Geth's systems. After several attempts, the Geth twitched and its flashlight eye came back on. It took in its surroundings and immediately stood up to stare at her inquisitively as the sounds she was used to hearing from Geth poured from it. Not the squealing of death, but the strange computerized clicking and buzzing that made up their language. It had a partial piece of what looked like her old armor integrated into its body on the chest and arm, the N7 logo and stripe clearly visible. There was a rather large hole in the lower half of its right side allowing her to clearly view it's colorful glowing circuitry inside. She stood, unafraid on her side of the barrier. "Can you understand me?"

It cocked it's head. "Yes."

"Are you going to attack me?"

"No."

"Every Geth I met before you tried to blow my head off," she said trying to lead it into a lie if that were the case.

"We have not met."

"No... You and I haven't, but I've met other Geth," she said, curious what that had to do with anything.

"We are all Geth, and we have not met you." It stated in it's clicking buzzing monotone voice. She crossed her arms and paced in front of the barrier, sizing it up, trying to figure out what it was talking about. It dogged her steps as it spoke. "You are Shepard. Commander. Alliance. Human. Fought Heretics. Killed by Collectors. Rediscovered on the Old Machine."

"You seem to know an awful lot about me," she pushed.

"Extranet data sources. Insecure broadcasts. All organic data sent out is received. We watch you." Shepard shuddered at it's blatant admittance to spying on humanity and her in particular. The Geth was mirroring her every movement. She watched it learn as she spoke.

"'Old Machine?' You mean the Reaper?" she asked.

"Reaper. A superstitious title originating with the Protheans. We call those entities the Old Machines." It's six plates surrounding the single flashlight eye and the widening and narrowing of the light as it focused and unfocused made the Geth's 'face' surprisingly expressive.

"What do you mean 'heretics'?" she asked trying to watch how it 'emoted' as it spoke.

"Geth build our own future. The heretics asked the Old Machines to give them the future. They are no longer part of us. We were studying the Old Machine's hardware to protect our future."

"Are the Reapers a threat to you too?" Shepard asked with curiosity. This was possible common ground.

"Yes."

"Why would they attack other machines?"

"We are different from them. Outside their plans."

"What future are the Geth building?" she asked, wondering if it could be possible to work together.

"Ours."

She sighed at the frustrating answer. "Will anyone else be affected by whatever it is you're doing?"

"If they involve themselves, they will."

"So, you _aren't_ allied with the Reapers?"

"We oppose the heretics. We oppose the Old Machines. Shepard Commander opposes the Old Machines. Shepard Commander opposes the heretics. Cooperation furthers mutual goals." Was that an offer of peace? Shepard needed to hear no more. If the thing was lying, it was doing a damn good job of convincing her.

"Are you asking to join us?"

"Yes."

Shepard lifted her arm and dropped the barrier between her and the Geth. "Then what should I call you?"

"Geth," It said, the plates that served as its cheeks flaring outward.

She smiled, the straightforward answer amusing her. "I mean you, specifically."

"We are all Geth," it insisted with another flare of the plates.

She chuckled and crossed her arms. "What is the individual in front of me called?"

"There is no individual. We are geth. There are currently 1,183 programs active within this platform."

EDI's avatar appeared, hovering beside Shepard."'My name is Legion, for we are many,'" she quoted.

"That seems appropriate," Shepard agreed.

It's eyebrow plates flared this time, as it computed. "Christian Bible, the Gospel of Mark, chapter five, verse nine. We acknowledge this as an appropriate metaphor. We are Legion, a terminal of the Geth. We will integrate into Normandy." Shepard held out her hand and Legion looked down at it momentarily before reaching it's metal hand tentatively out to accept the handshake. "We anticipate the exchange of data."

Shepard left the AI core feeling amazingly lighthearted. She had just become the first human ever to hold a conversation with a Geth and have it come to a peaceful conclusion. She felt the need to share her excitement. She walked quickly to the main battery and knocked, forgetting completely just how late it was. Garrus' voice quickly answered and she frowned as she entered. "What are you still doing up, Big Guy?" she asked as she took note of him working at his console.

"Did you forget how little sleep we Turians need?" he asked, craning his neck to grace her with a smile. "The real question is, what are you doing up?"

"Couldn't sleep," she admitted with a shrug, settling herself on her favorite crate. She bit her lip, wanting to tell him about Legion, but concerned he might be angry. He hadn't been a fan of bringing the Geth along in the first place.

"You have nervous face," he pointed out, stopping what he was doing to turn and face her, leaning against the console and casually crossing his arms. "You're either planning on something rash, or like in most cases, you've already done it and you're worried I might disapprove."

She offered him a sheepish grin. "I activated the Geth."

His eyes narrowed as they swept her from head to foot, making sure she was still in one piece. "You could have come and got me," he scolded.

"I thought it might be best if as few people possible were present," she shrugged.

"So I see you're still in one piece, does that mean you killed it or is it locked away in the AI core?" he asked.

"Neither," she admitted. "It asked to join us."

"And you let it?" he asked, a single brow plate lifting in surprise.

She explained what Legion had told her about the difference between Geth and Heretics and how it was simply trying to protect its people from the Reapers, just like they were. "So now it is standing in the AI core, with EDI making sure it doesn't try to hack our systems and I'm calling it Legion."

"Oh, you know as soon as you name something you start getting attached," he groaned. "This is Ferguson the Space Hamster all over again."

"Hey! You leave Ferguson out of this. You're just mad that he doesn't like you." she harrumphed, crossing her arms.

He chuckled. "Well, I'd rather it was the hamster that didn't like me than his human mommy, Shepard."

She smiled. "Thanks for earlier," she said.

"Which part? Where I fought the urge to toss you or where I helped you bring that thing on board?" he chuckled.

She shook her head. "Neither. When the husk grabbed me. If you hadn't been there, it would have pulled me right over the edge."

He shuddered. "Let's not think about that."

"I'm still grateful."

"You really should get some sleep, Shepard." He purred, accepting her gratitude.

"You're probably right, Big Guy. I'm going to send a ship-wide announcement about Legion and then get some much needed shut eye."

"You'd better hope the news doesn't blow a hole in Tali's suit," he warned.

She stopped in her tracks and tensed. "Maybe I'll get up early and tell her face to face... or face to helmet as it were."

"Good luck," he called after her as she left him to his calibrating.

* * *

 

The next day when Shepard had found Legion, still standing in the same place she'd left it, she'd puzzled over why it hadn't ventured out to explore. She supposed exploring wasn't really a synthetic pastime. It stood quietly, probably computing pi or something like that. When she approached, it spoke, looking up from where it's flashlight had been staring at the ground. "Shepard Commander, we have finished analyzing the data from the Old Machine."

"What did you find out?" Shepard asked, curious if there was anything in Legion's analysis that might help. It studied and mimicked her mannerisms. The behavior had been going on since she'd woken it up. The plates around its 'face' flared and it explained about the heretic geth and the Reaper 'virus' that was causing them to worship the Reapers. "Can we shut it down?" she asked.

It agreed, informing her that the heretics had a station not far from their location and it forwarded the coordinates at her command. They approached the floating space station and she stood on the bridge with Joker and Legion as Joker argued that the Geth were going to see them approaching out the window, even though their heat signatures were masked by the stealth systems. "Geth do not use windows. They are a structural weakness," Legion said matter of factly and returned its attention to the coordinates it was working on.

Joker rolled his eyes and danced like a robot in his seat, expressing his displeasure at having a Geth on board his ship. Shepard shot him a warning glare and he sighed and followed Legion's directions to the docking port.

* * *

 

Shepard swallowed her anxiety as they made their way through the silent station. As soon as they had passed through the airlock, she'd felt trapped. She occupied her mind, thinking about what Legion had said about their original purpose being to destroy the heretics, but that there was a second option. Rewriting. Essentially it told her the Geth could be brainwashed to think like it and the other Geth instead of the heretic beliefs. A difficult decision. Legion assured her that most of the heretic Geth were unaware of their presence, but the lack of air and gravity in the enclosed space was making her feel severely claustrophobic. Her only saving grace was Garrus' soothing hum at her back as they moved through the station.

As Legion led them to the central processing unit in the center of the station, they came across sleeping Geth attached to hubs where they stared out at them, unaware of their presence. Legion informed them that crossing the data streams running along the floors would alert the sleeping Geth and suggested they make a preemptive strike on the hubs themselves.

With a frown at its willingness to slaughter its own people, Shepard punched in her overload and shocked the lone hub in the first room. They needed to finish off a few of the Geth that escaped with damaged shields and then Legion explained that the hubs were just there to charge the Geth hardware (their bodies). Their true minds lived in the software consensus. The bodies were simply tools.

They took care of all of the Geth that became alerted to their presence and finally came to a large window that looked out on what resembled a large server room. "This isn't like the other hubs we've seen here," Shepard commented through her helmet, breaking the relative silence.

"This is a database. It contains a portion of the heretics' accumulated memories," Legion explained, a whirring beneath its speech as it interfaced wirelessly with the rows of processors. "Wait! We discovered copies of our current patrol routes in this database." Its face plates flared in alarm. "This suggests the heretics have runtimes within our networks."

"We wouldn't be here if the heretics wanted to be friends with the Geth. Why wouldn't they spy on you?" Shepard asked unsure why this surprised the Geth.

"You do not understand. Organics do not know each other's minds. Geth do. We are not suspicious. We accept each other. The heretics desired to leave. We understood their reasons. We allowed it." Its forehead plates lifted making it look like its face shrugged. "There was peace between us."

"It couldn't have lasted forever. You disagreed about what path your race should take," Shepard tried to explain.

"Human history is a litany of blood shed over differing ideals of rulership and afterlife. Geth have no such history. We shared consensus on such things," Its voice lowered and if Shepard didn't know better she would have said it sounded sad. "How could we have become so different? Why can we no longer understand each other?" It hung its head and an actual shrug of its shoulders clenched Shepard's heart as it said. "What did we do wrong?"

She felt the need to comfort the machine. "When individuals are separated, they develop in different ways. When they get back together, they don't always get along." She said in a soft voice.

"If this is the individuality you value, we question your judgement. This topic is irrelevant. We must return to the mission." Shepard knew a dropped topic when she heard one. Legion was apparently uncomfortable discussing this.

Amazed that a Geth was capable of being uncomfortable she said, "Have you reached a decision about whether to rewrite the heretics or not?"

"We are still trying to build consensus. Some processes judge destruction preferable. Others rewrite."

Shepard nodded. "Let's keep moving." She was more than ready to get off this station. She could feel the walls closing in on her.

The next room was where Legion started its upload. While the program uploaded, they were faced with more Geth as the hacking alerted the heretics to their presence. After five or six waves of Geth tried and failed to kill them, Legion announced that, "Datamine and analysis complete. Shepard Commander. It is time to choose. Do we rewrite the heretics or delete them?"

Shepard frowned as she approached the terminal where it stood. "Why are you letting me make this decision? They're your people."

"We are conflicted. There is no consensus among our higher order runtimes. 573 favor rewrite, and 571 favor destruction." Legion explained as it honest to goodness fidgeted. "Shepard Commander. You have fought the heretics, You have perspective we lack. The Geth grant their fate to you."

Shepard looked to Garrus who shrugged. She couldn't read his expression behind his helmet. They had come to destroy the heretics and this moral dilemma was giving her a headache. She wanted off this station. "There's no guarantee that they won't come to the same conclusions again, is there? To worship the Reapers, and attack organics?"

"There is a non zero probability of error," it agreed.

"Then blow them up. We have a chance to end this, I won't waste it," she sighed. She knew she'd rather be dead than brainwashed any day. There was no reason the geth should be treated any differently than organics. Legion was showing her a very human like being beneath its metallic skin.

"Acknowledged." It announced, moving to the console. "Collapsing antimatter magnetic bottling mechanisms. Done. We recommend withdrawal to Normandy." The station shook as Legion finished up the program and stepped back. They quickly exited the station before it imploded.

* * *

 

Shepard was enjoying lunch in the mess when Tali breezed by, a slew of Quarian curses following in her wake. The girl had a pistol in her hand and was heading for the AI core. Shepard's eyes widened and she dropped her fork. She jumped out of her seat and gave chase to see what the problem was. When she reached them, Tali had the pistol aimed at Legion. "Shepard, I'm glad you're here. I caught Legion scanning my omnitool. It was going to send data about the Flotilla back to the Geth!"

"Creators performed weapons tests and were discussing plans to attack us. We believed it necessary to warn our people," Legion explained calmly.

"We weakened the Geth by destroying that base, Shepard, but they're still a threat! I won't let Legion endanger the Fleet!" Tali seethed. Legion had been a point of contention for her since Shepard had announced it had been reactivated.

"Creator Tali'Zorah acts out of loyalty to her people. She was willing to be exiled to protect them. We must also protect our people from the Creator threat," Legion argued, its voice lending no hint to how it 'felt' about the gun in its face.

"You can't let this happen, Shepard. I trusted you, and I worked with a Geth on the team, but this is too much!"

Shepard pinched the bridge of her nose. This was the argument between Miranda and Jack all over again. "Tali, your father was running brutal experiments. If the subjects had been human, I'd damn well be telling the Alliance about it."

"I know. But if the Geth find out..."

Shepard cut her off with a sharp swipe of her hand. "They'd attack. Which would cause a war that would leave both the Geth and the Quarians vulnerable when the Reapers show up. Is that what you want, Legion?"

"We believed it was necessary to relay the information." Legion looked to the floor, clearly perturbed.

"Sooner or later, you're both gonna have to stop fighting this war. Or we'll _all_ end up paying for it." Shepard snapped.

After a brief pause, Legion said, "To facilitate unit cohesion, we will not transmit data regarding Creator plans."

Tali lowered her pistol and stepped back a bit. "Thank you, Legion. I... understand your intention. What if I gave you some non-classified data to send?"

"We would be grateful," Legion said, its flashlight turning toward Tali with 'surprise' in it's voice.

 


	24. Popping the Heat Sink

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mission comes to a head, as well as a few other things.

EDI had warned against using the Normandy to travel anywhere for the time being as she made absolutely certain that the Reaper IFF was not going to damage their systems. That was why Shepard found herself crammed in the shuttle with every single one of her crew members as they taxi'd toward a neighboring system to check on a tip she'd gotten about a failing Cerberus project that had sent a distress call to the Illusive Man. Until she assessed the situation she hadn't known who she wanted to take on the ground. She sat between Garrus and Jack, leaning forward with her elbows resting on her knees and her face buried in her palms. She was eager to get the mission going and head through the Omega 4 relay, but caution was key. In the meantime, she needed to keep busy or she would rip her hair out.

Garrus rumbled in his chest to get her attention. When she looked up, his eyes asked if she was alright. She studied his healing scars. The cybernetic bandage had become frayed around the edges, but it still blinked as it continued to repair the tissue of his face. She flashed him a short smile before leaning back in her seat, jostling Jack as she made room for her armored shoulders. Her hand found his knee and she leaned her head back to rest against the wall.

The shuttle was awkwardly silent as everyone felt the pressure of their main mission gaining on them. When the shuttle's comm chirped out of nowhere, just about everyone jumped, the mood in the tiny space tensing. Jacob, who was piloting the shuttle tapped the console to bring up the comm. "Shepard," EDI's voice poured from the speakers all around them.

"Something wrong, EDI?" Shepard asked, her back stiff as she sat at attention.

"There has been an incident. Jeff asked me to send a message to appraise you of the situation. While you were away, a virus in the IFF transmitted the Normandy's location to the Collectors. The ship was overrun and the crew is gone. I was able to guide Jeff safely to the AI core and engineering to give me control of the ship. I rid the Normandy of hostiles and scrubbed the virus. I have sent you the coordinates of the Normandy's current location."

"Jesus," Shepard said. "Jacob. Get us back to the Normandy. Now."

* * *

 

Joker was sitting on the table in the comm room. He looked exhausted but unharmed. At least there was nothing visible. She was certain with his condition he had probably suffered some stress fractures. "Everyone?" Miranda stormed in, shouting. "You lost everyone and damn near lost the ship, too?"

"I know, alright," Joker complained. "I was here!"

"It's not his fault, Miranda," Jacob chided, his voice compassionate. "None of us caught it."

"Mr. Taylor is correct," EDI chimed in. "The harmful data in the Collector drive was even more sophisticated than the 'black box' Reaper viruses I was given."

"I heard it was a rough ride," Shepard said, stepping up to Joker, her own voice soft. "How are you holding up?"

Joker refused to meet her gaze, instead, staring off into nothing. "There's a lot of empty chairs in here."

"We did everything we could, Jeff," EDI purred softly, her synthetic voice full of sympathy.

"Yeah, thanks mom," Joker retorted.

Shepard sighed. "Is the ship clean? We can't risk this happening again."

Joker finally looked at her. "EDI and I purged the systems. The Reaper IFF is online. We can go through the Omega 4 relay whenever you want."

"Don't even get me started about unshackling a damned AI," Miranda grumbled, crossing her arms, her expression fierce.

Joker stood up for himself, "What could I do against Collectors, break my arm at them? EDI cleared the ship... she's alright." Shepard knew that was something extremely difficult for Joker to admit. He had gone so far in the past to call the AI 'ship cancer'.

"I assure you, I am still bound by protocols in my programming. Even if I were not, you are my crew mates." EDI said, her voice conveying true feeling.

"EDI has had plenty of opportunity to kill us. We need all the help we can get," Shepard agreed. She'd heard the personality in the AI as it had messed with Joker, playfully teasing him. Shepard actually appreciated the personality behind the sultry voice.

"Sounds like we have everything we need to rescue the crew," Jacob pointed out.

"We've done everything we can. It's time to take the fight to the Collectors," Miranda agreed.

Shepard's blood froze at the thought. There was no delaying now. As much as she wanted this over with, she was afraid. She swallowed her racing heart. "Joker, head back up to the bridge. The rest of you, to your stations."

* * *

 

They were on their way to the Collector base. Shepard's hands were shaking as she showered. She'd never been so stressed in her life. After she finished up, she stepped out into her cabin, wrapped in a towel, her hair still wet. She caught movement near the door and turned to see Garrus smiling at her. He was holding a bottle of something in his left hand and his voice came out in a stutter. "Hey, I brought wine." He stepped closer, "Best I could afford on a vigilante's salary." She crossed her arms and smirked at him as he jumped into action, scurrying past her to the room's sound system. He input a code that brought on a soft song to play over her room's speakers. As he held his arms out presenting himself, she approached him, walking with a switch to her hips. "If you were a Turian, I'd be complimenting your waist or your fringe, so uh..." his eyes roved over her standing before him, in nothing more than a towel, her skin still a bit damp and her hair freshly brushed out, but still wet. The look on his face was admiration. "Your um... hair... looks good, and your waist is very... supportive." She continued to gaze at him, and hummed a bit as he nervously complimented her, hoping to ease his tension. "Hopefully that's not offensive in human culture..."

She stepped up close to him, a suggestive smile on her face and pressed her palm to his chest. "Whoa... consider me seduced, smooth talker. Now shut up and stop worrying." She reached over and shut off the music and took the bottle from his hand to set it down on her desk.

He began to stutter again. "I...just... I..." He took a deep breath as she reassured him by taking his hand in hers. "I've seen so many things go wrong, Shepard. My work at C-Sec, what happened with Sidonis... I want something to go right, just once."

She reached up, gently caressing her fingers over his scarred mandible, the goofy grin she'd held, fading to a look of understanding. In a way, she felt exactly the same. He tipped his head, closing his eyes and his forehead touched hers. She leaned into the touch as his arm came up to pull her close to him in a gentle hug. She nuzzled his neck, breathing on his skin, while he ran his fingers down her back. "You never need to feel like you need to impress me," she whispered.

"Well if that's the case, I feel extremely over dressed," he rumbled in her ear.

* * *

 

Garrus had been a nervous wreck as he'd rode the elevator up to Shepard's cabin. Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined that he would walk in to her fresh out of the shower in nothing but a towel, her soft skin still damp and glistening in the gentle glow of the fish tank. He'd lost all train of thought as his eyes roved her body. He'd awkwardly spouted some compliments off the top of his head and thought he had doomed himself. As he'd tried to explain, she'd simply smiled and drew him closer.

Now they were hugging and she was accepting him. His heart was racing and hers was fluttering right along beside it. She was breathing heavily on his neck and she whispered softly. "You never need to feel like you need to impress me..."

He chuckled softly and she pressed herself closer to his body. "Well, if that's the case, I feel extremely over dressed." He slipped a talon between her towel and her back, caressing over her skin before tugging at the fabric.

"Oh, you definitely are, Big Guy," she teased, her fingers moving up his chest. She artfully slipped them between his fringe and the softer skin underneath.

He hummed, closing his eyes. Shepard had definitely done her research. He nearly forgot what he was doing as she tickled over the sensitive area and stood on her tip toes to kiss his good mandible. He could feel his lower plates sliding away as she pushed his buttons. She moved her fingers away from her teasing and tugged on his clothes, grumbling at the fact that they were still on. "Spirits, Shepard, are you always so impatient?" he teased and she pulled away to stand back and gestured to his clothes.

"You are eventually going to need to show me how you work those things," she snorted. "I like to be a little more _hands_ on," she purred, watching him fiddle with the workings of his shirt. When he'd finished and he stood before her shirtless, she bit her lip and her eyes roved his naked chest.

He stepped forward and brushed aside her arms that she'd crossed over her chest. Then he hooked a talon into where she'd tucked the edge of her towel to hold it up and pulled. The towel fell at her feet and she grinned at him as he took in her exquisitely formed body. What fascinated him most were her breasts. They were smaller than most of the humans in Joker's vids, but as he took them in, placed on display on her well toned frame, he found they were more attractive that way. He moved to touch them and then faltered. With a throaty chuckle, she picked up his hand and placed it on her breast, understanding he was unsure. They knew each other so well, this should be easier. He kept thinking he was going to read a cue wrong and do something to turn her off for good.

She kicked aside the towel and wrapped her arms once again around his neck. With barely a warning, she jumped up, and wrapped her legs around his waist. He caught her, his hand abandoning her breast to hoist her up by her rear. He gave it a short squeeze, liking the feel of it in his palms. Then she pressed her lips to his, finding a way to make her human lips meld with his in a way that he was not going to complain about. When she plunged her tongue in his mouth, his heart skipped and he pulled away, making her moan. "Dextro," he reminded her.

She shook her head. "Not a problem..." she bit her lip and looked slightly awkward. "I... took a test to be sure."

He chuckled and his subharmonics must have played on her hormones because as he spoke, she pressed her hips closer to him, her back arching slightly. "You exposed yourself to dextro fluids to be sure you wouldn't be allergic to me?" she nodded coyly and he chuckled again. "You're so crazy, Shepard... I like it."

"Shut up," she purred and pressed her lips to his again. He carried her over to her bed, her weight nothing to him. After he set her gently down on the bed, she watched him intently as he removed his pants and boots. She cocked her head, studying his physique and his only partially opened plates. She reached up with her foot and nudged his thigh, a seductive smile playing over her face. He'd never seen anything like it on a human face before. She was genuinely attracted to him. With that realization, his plates slid a little farther open and he felt a soft, lustful growl reverberate through his chest. "God, Garrus, that sound."

She scooted closer to him and wrapped her legs around his waist again and pulled. She tugged him off balance and to avoid crushing her he threw his arms out to either side of her shoulders, landing just above her. She chuckled, that throaty sound he recognized from earlier. He grinned and held himself aloft over her as he leaned in and put his long Turian tongue to good use. He flicked it down her neck, just below her ear and she tightened her grip on his waist and moaned, making him keep going. He fluttered his mandibles just over her skin, tickling the sensitive area he'd discovered. It wasn't too far from where a Turian female might like that sort of attention. He felt himself relaxing as Shepard guided him with her body, just as she might on the battle field. Every moan and laugh, and squirm of her body told him exactly what she wanted from him. She took the attention, hungrily soaking up the contact between them, but she gave as good as she got, having figured out every single one of his buttons and pressing them hard.

When finally she'd had enough of the foreplay, she drew up her foot and pushed him onto his back. He was ready for her, achingly so. She threw one leg over him, guiding herself down on top of his erection. She threw her head back as she slowly pushed him into her. He reached up, cupping her breasts in his palms and marveling over the hardening of her nipples at his attention. She gazed down at him and slowly began to work her hips in small circles, drawing a rumble of pleasure from his chest. She fell on top of him, still moving and reached to play with that sweet spot just below his fringe. He purred and she pressed her lips to his again. "You sure know how to multitask, Shepard," he smiled up at her when she pulled away to kiss down his mandible. He nudged her lips away and turned his head to gently take the soft flesh of her neck into his mouth and bite down, teasingly.

"Holy....sh..." her breathy exclamation was cut off as she sighed at the attention. Her hips ground into him, and he refused to let go of her neck. His mandibles spread as he grinned, and added a gentle pressure again, humming to add some vibration to the act. He had figured out that she really liked his subharmonics. "Never stop doing that," she groaned, chuckling.

He pulled away to let out his own moan as the chuckle tensed some of her muscles that were sheathing him. "Spirits."

"Are you close?" she asked, a heady urging in her tone, telling him she was definitely nearly there herself.

He nodded, then grabbed her in his mouth again. Her skin was salty with sweat and he cherished the taste of her. A few more strokes of her hips and he felt her muscles tense around him, drawing his own climax to a head. He held her still as he bit down a little harder and she clutched at the sheets beside his head. The small sounds she made as she came for him were surprisingly some of the sexiest he'd ever heard. He released her flesh from his mouth and her weight settled down on top of him.

"You're still purring," she sighed, her ear pressed to his chest as she traced fingers over his chest plates.

"After a performance like that, the Collectors are going to be looking at me funny as we stroll through their base killing them, because I'll be 'purring' for hours." He wrapped his arms around her, gently running his talons over the skin of her back.

She chuckled and he winced at the sensation. "So, not a horrible inter-species awkwardness thing?"

"Definitely not, at least not for me," he said. "Were you...."

"Oh, don't worry Big Guy," she turned her head so her chin rested on his chest and she looked at him with a hazy, contented glaze over her eyes. "You definitely had the reach you promised."

He chuckled, "Well, your flexibility was impressive."

She never ceased to amaze him. He had been so jittery about something going wrong, but here she was lying lazily on top of him, and grinning. Whatever happened next, he prayed to the spirits that they would both make it out alive. He reached up and tousled her hair teasingly before tucking it gently behind her ears and dragging his talon down her neck and under her chin. She moved upward at the coaxing, and he slipped out of her while she kissed his lips one last time. "Well, I need another shower before Joker gets us to the relay," she sighed. "Would you like to join me?"

* * *

 

Shepard stood behind Joker's pilot seat in full armor as they approached the relay. She'd prepared herself for anything. Her arms were crossed and her tactical visor was reading energy levels off the charts as she stared at the sickly looking relay. Most relays were a bright glowing bluish white light. The Omega 4 relay was red. She wrinkled her nose, thinking how wrong it looked. She'd just had the best time of her life a short while ago with Garrus and now they had to go through that mess. She thought back fondly on the experience hoping they would get the chance to do it again, hoping this mission wouldn't kill them.

"Approaching Omega 4 relay," Joker announced over the ship's comm. " Everyone stand by."

The atmosphere on the ship was tense. Even on the bridge, Shepard could feel it, like a plague coursing through the hull. She had sanctioned every upgrade and done systems checks personally, but there was always something to be missed. EDI had assured her that they were as ready as they were ever going to be, but still her heart raced. "Let's make it happen," she said.

"Reaper IFF activated," EDI announced. "Signal acknowledged."

Jacob's voice filtered through the cockpit speakers, "Commander? The drive core just lit up like a Christmas Tree!"

"Drive core electrical charge at critical levels," EDI agreed.

"Rerouting," Joker said, a panicked edge to his voice as he furiously worked the ship's controls.

They were right on top of the relay now. The red light was blinding as the sparks of plasma licked the Normandy's hull, tasting them, drawing them in. They shot through the relay and space zipped past. Shepard gripped the back of Joker's chair, the feeling of inertia leaving her stomach back in the Omega system. "Brace for deceleration," EDI purred.

Everything seemed to pause as they dropped out of relay speed right in the middle of a gigantic debris field. "Oh, Shit!" Joker cursed, his fingers worked with a speed she was unaware he had in him, pulling the Normandy through some dips, dives and turns to shoot them up over the debris. When they crested the field, the ship hovered in the galactic core. It was beautiful. Joker breathed a heavy sigh. "Too close." In spite of the mess of long dead ships scattered everywhere, the system was quiet, serene even. Several miles ahead, there was an enormous black star wreathed in a wash of blinding light. All around the star was a ring of debris, reminding Shepard of Saturn back in the Sol system. "These must be all of the ships that tried to make it through the Omega 4 relay. Some look... ancient." His voice was awed, and she had to agree. They were trail blazers. No one had ever survived the jump they had just come out of.

"I have detected an energy signature near the edge of the accretion disk," EDI informed them.

"Has to be the Collector base," Shepard said, trying to squint out the windows to see anything in the mess. Take us in for a closer look. Nice and easy."

As Joker piloted the Normandy through the silent graves of unlucky past travelers, EDI chirped out a warning. "Careful, Jeff. We have company."

"Taking evasive maneuvers," Joker announced as he dodged laser fire from some unknown assailants dogging their heels. They refused to be lost and he grumbled. "Now they're just pissing me off." He gestured over the controls and the Normandy began firing back. "EDI, take these bastards out!"

Shepard watched the Normandy taking hits over the sensors and bit her lip. "As long as the new plating holds," Miranda commented, appearing in the doorway of the cockpit.

"They want another round? Come on girl, let's give it to them," Joker said to EDI, making Shepard smile at his obvious attachment to the newly unshackled personality of the AI he'd previously tried to get to stop watching him by greasing her cameras.

The Normandy took a few more hits as Joker piloted her in style through all of the debris. EDI simultaneously fired on the attacking drones. Suddenly a large crash shook the ship and EDI brought up a small holo of the Normandy. "Alert. Hull breach on the Engineering deck."

"It's in the cargo hold," Joker sneered, reading the holo.

"I'll take a team and deal with the intruder. You get the rest of them off our tail," Shepard ordered, turning and jogging down the empty halls to the elevator. "Garrus, Tali, meet me at the elevator. We need to get to the cargo bay."

With affirmatives from each of them, she slammed her palm on the button for the crew deck, to pick up Garrus on the way down. He was waiting by the doors, rifle in hand. "Everything's going swimmingly I see," he smirked as she closed the door behind him and they rode down to engineering.

"Walk in the park, Big Guy," she returned the smirk and knuckled his shoulder, checking her pistol.

They grabbed Tali and quietly made their way to the cargo bay through the hidden stairwell below Zaeed's favorite spot near the garbage compactor. The cargo hold was loud, the noise from the fight outside and whatever was hiding down there piercing. There was a gigantic hole in the side of the ship where the thing had blasted its way in. She glanced around, swallowing her mild panic at the open air sealed off by nothing more than a barrier field. She took cover behind the shuttle when she saw the giant floating drone at the far side of the bay. It was a large silver ball with a red light shining in the middle, making it resemble an eyeball. When it spotted them, it began to fire a laser beam from it's pupil, leaving long lines of burnt Normandy in it's path.

She fired on it a few times and her bullets did nothing. She holstered her gun and swapped it for the Particle Beam she was keeping handy for the collector base. Praying it did some damage, she fired on the thing while Tali let loose her drone to distract it and Garrus made precision shots in it's pupil with his sniper rifle. Finally, the thing had enough, flying back out the hole it came in from. She sighed with relief, plopping down on her rear as Joker shouted. "We're sitting ducks out here. I have to try and lose them in the debris field!"

"Our kinetic barriers are not designed to survive impact with debris that size, Jeff," EDI worried.

"Then I guess it's a good thing we upgraded. We're going in," he warned.

Shepard remained on the ground as the ship zipped in and out of small pockets of debris, jostling everyone. Garrus dropped beside her, a devious grin on his face. "Oh, you are having way too much fun," she grinned.

"We haven't even docked yet," he purred.

She chuckled. "I'm pretty sure you docked earlier."

"Keelah," Tali groaned, overhearing their conversation. "Not the time you two."

"Come on, find some room," Joker said through obviously gritted teeth by his tone.

"Kinetic barriers at 40 percent," EDI informed them.

"Reroute non critical power! This is gonna hurt!" Joker shouted. Shepard's heart was racing as they jostled around in the noisy cargo bay. She trusted Joker and EDI with her life. The two of them working together would get them out of there safely. She closed her eyes and prayed. Finally after what felt like forever, the Normandy evened out and the jostling stopped. "Damage report," Joker asked.

"Kinetic barriers steady at 30 percent. No significant damage." EDI announced.

Shepard sighed with relief and her eyes found Tali. "Thanks for those new shields, Tali."

"No problem." Shepard heard the proud smirk in her voice.

"Take the helm EDI and keep it slow. See if we can avoid any more attention," Joker said.

"I have detected an enemy heading for the cargo hold," EDI warned them.

"Here we go again," she sighed as the floating eyeball of doom blasted its way back into the ship, leaving another hole in her hull. The poor Normandy was going to need a pretty good makeover if they survived all of this.

With the same methods they used previously, they slowly whittled down the Oculus' armor plating and Shepard aimed inside the monstrosity and blew it up. "I think it's going to stay dead this time," Garrus quipped as he stood up from his crouch behind one of the dampening coils.

"Better get back up here, Commander," Joker said over Shepard's personal comm.

"We're about to clear the debris field," Miranda seconded. Shepard left Tali and Garrus with a thankful pat to each of their shoulders and hurried back to the bridge. She reached the bridge just in time to see the massive 'planet' hovering in front of them. It was long and cylindrical, closely resembling the ship they'd encountered, but thousands of times larger. "There is is," Miranda said in awe. "The Collector base."

"See if you can find a place to land without drawing attention," Shepard said, swallowing the lump in her throat at the sight of the massive space station. It was the largest fabricated structure she'd ever encountered. She hoped EDI was getting accurate scans so they wouldn't get lost once they were inside.

"Too late. Looks like they're sending out an old friend to greet us," Joker quipped as a small port opened on the side of the base and the vessel she assumed was the same one they had kept encountering glided out.

As soon as it was facing them, it began to fire it's horrible yellow particle beam at them. Shepard ground her jaw and clenched her fists, the ugly ship finally getting on her last nerve. "Let's show them our new teeth," she growled, thinking of all of the hard work Garrus had put into perfecting the Thanix canon. "Fire the main gun!"

The whole Normandy rumbled as the guns descended and fired. Their own particle beam shot from below, hitting the Collector vessel dead center. "How do you like that, you sons-of-bitches!" Joker whooped, throwing his arms up in the air.

"That was a beautiful sight," Garrus chuckled in her ear over her personal comm.

She smiled and stepped up behind Joker's chair. "Get in close and finish them off," she ordered.

"Everybody hold on! Gonna be a wild ride," Joker shouted, renewed vigor and excitement in his voice. He dodged the Collector's attacks, getting the Normandy in close and pounding the firing mechanism. "Give 'em hell, girl!"

The Thanix cannon did its job, ripping a massive hole the size of the Normandy itself in the side of the Collector vessel. "Look out!" Miranda shouted as the vessel unexpectedly exploded, remnants of its weapon firing out in a halo around the defeated ship.

The shockwave hit the Normandy and they were thrown around the cockpit as alarms began screeching. "Mass Effect field generators are offline!" Joker shouted from where he'd been knocked out of his seat. He picked himself up and flopped back in his chair. "EDI, give me something!"

"Generators are unresponsive. All hands, brace for impact." the AI spoke urgently.

The Normandy careened toward the Collector base, smacking a few metal outcroppings on the station before crashing down and sliding noisily across the flat surface EDI had found with an ear splitting shriek and flying sparks as the metal of their hull scraped along. They finally ground to a stop, knocking Shepard off her feet. She quickly recovered as the ship stopped moving and shouted, "Joker! You okay?"

He grunted and let out a sigh. "I think I broke a rib." Another hiss of breath and he craned his neck back against the head rest of his chair. "Ugh... or all of them..."

"Multiple core systems overloaded during the crash," EDI chirped. "Restoring operation will take time."

Miranda sighed, brushing herself off. "We all knew this was likely a one way trip."

Shepard ground her teeth. "I'll do whatever it takes to stop the Collectors, but I plan to live to tell about it."

"I'm glad you're in charge," Joker quipped. "What's next?" He began fiddling with his controls, beginning the process of getting the Normandy back into flying shape.

"Joker, you and EDI get the ship back online. Miranda, gather everyone else in the briefing room. We need a plan."

Miranda stalked off to do as she was ordered and Shepard patted Joker gently as he worked through his pain. He had so much dedication. He tossed her a reassuring grin before shooing her to get out of his way.

She went to the briefing room. Mordin, Jacob and Miranda already waited for her, checking their weapons and arming up. The rest of the crew all arrived in waves, the urgency clear in how fast they got there. Once everyone stood around the large table, Shepard made her way to the center of the far end, wringing her hands. "This isn't how we planned this, but this is where we're at. We can't worry about whether the Normandy can get us home. We came to _stop_ the Collectors. That means coming up with a plan to take out this station." She leaned her palms on the table and continued. "EDI, bring up your scans."

A large display of the schematics of the Collector base appeared in the holoprojector in the middle of the table. Shepard studied the possible entries and exits and weak spots while EDI spoke. "You should be able to overload their critical systems if you get to the main control center here." She helpfully placed a digital marker on the projection.

"But that means going through the heart of the station," Jacob pointed out. "Right past this massive energy signature."

"That's the central chamber. If our crew or any of the colonists are still alive, the Collectors are probably holding them in there," she mused.

Jacob pulled up his omnitool and marked the schematic as well. "Looks like there are two main routes. It might be a good idea to split up to keep the Collectors off balance, then regroup in the central chamber."

"No good," Miranda piped up. "Both routes are blocked. See these doors? The only way past is to get someone to open them from the other side."

"It's not a fortress. There's gotta be something," Shepard scanned the projection again, furiously looking for a way around. "Here. Maybe we can send someone in through this ventilation shaft."

"Practically a suicide mission. I volunteer," Jacob stepped up boldly, crossing his arms.

Miranda's voice came out skeptical. "I appreciate the thought Jacob, but you couldn't shut down the security systems in time." She spun to look at Shepard. "We need to send in a tech expert."

"It's your call, Commander. Who do we send into the shaft?" Jacob asked.

Shepard bit her lip, glancing around at all her tech experts. Tali was her best, but she was planning on taking her on her team. The next best option was... "Legion, you can hack through anything. I'm sending you into the shaft."

The Geth adjusted its assault rifle and rolled its shoulders. "Acknowledged."

"The rest of us will break into two teams and fight down each passage. That should draw the Collectors' attention away from what you're doing." She pushed up from the table to stand straight.

"I'll lead the second fire team, Shepard," Miranda volunteered herself. "We'll meet up with you on the other side of the doors."

"Not so fast, Cheerleader," Jack objected a scowl on her face. "Nobody wants to take orders from you."

Surprisingly enough, Garrus was standing beside Jack, shaking his head in agreement. Shepard trusted Miranda, but apparently not a lot of the rest of her crew was willing to listen to her orders. "This isn't a popularity contest!" Miranda swiped her hand down in anger. "Lives are at stake. Shepard, you need someone who can command loyalty through experience."

Shepard again glanced around at her people. Aside from Miranda, she knew of two others she could trust to get the job done. No way was she letting Garrus out of her sight, even if it was to lead his own team. "Jacob, you're in charge of the second team."

"Good luck, Taylor," Miranda smirked, stepping down. "Let's see if you're ready for command." The glance they exchanged told Shepard that she and Garrus hadn't been the only ones finding a bit of calm before the storm in each other's arms. She smiled softly, hiding the expression behind the neck piece of her armor.

She replaced the smile with a stoic 'Commander' face and began pacing, addressing each of them with her eyes as she spoke. "I dunno what we're going to find in there, but I won't lie to you. It's not going to be easy. We've lost good people. We may lose more." She stopped her pacing and kept her hands from shaking by clasping them together behind her back in a casual at ease posture. "We don't know how many the Collectors have stolen... thousands... hundreds of thousands... It's not important. What matters is this... Not. One. More." Each word she punctuated with a determined slash of her hand. "That's what we can do, here, today. It ends with us. They wanna know what we're made of? I say we show them, on our terms. Let's bring our people home."

The mood of the room shifted and Shepard felt a weight off her shoulders as everyone faced her and their mission with brief smiles of confidence. She split the teams, taking Garrus, Tali, Jack, Mordin and Thane with her, leaving Jacob with the larger and harder hitting team so they could keep an eye on each other. Once everyone had their assignments, there was no time to waste any more. Shepard led her team to the airlock while Jacob took his people down to leave through the cargo bay's new hole. Thankful for the air and gravity on the station, Shepard activated her tactical visor and checked her weapons before starting down their agreed upon path. A short ways into the tunnel, Legion contacted her over the comms. "We are in postition. Exterior temperature slightly elevated. No obstructions detected."

She breathed a sigh of relief as Legion started on its mission and her team followed behind her in tight formation. "Second team... are you in position?" she called over the comms.

"In position," Jacob's smooth voice came over the comm in her suit. "Meet you on the other side of those doors." The first few meters of tunnels reminded her of the first time they had boarded a Collector ship. Deserted. They crept through the area, everyone on high alert. At the first sign of trouble in the first open area, her comms buzzed again. "Jacob here. We're taking heavy fire, but we're moving forward." His words sounded confident and she was certain they would be okay. Everyone on her crew knew how to handle themselves.

Her team took cover and pushed forward slowly as the Collectors swarmed them. It was much the same as any Collector battle, but she was relieved that there were no husks showing their ugly faces yet. They were the worst to deal with because of their sheer numbers. The implications behind that was more than a bit disturbing though. If they weren't turning the abducted colonists into husks, what exactly was happening in this particular level of hell? "No husks," she grumbled to herself, trying to work it all out in her head.

"Not that I'm complaining, but where are those bastards?" Garrus seconded, having heard her over the comm.

Tali released another combat drone and it buzzed by Shepard's head to attack a Harbinger avatar a few feet away. "What are they doing to the colonists?" The Quarian asked, putting words to Shepard's fears.

"Perhaps there is another reason for the abductions, Siha," Thane suggested as he sniped the Harbinger as it was distracted, drawing a soft growl through Garrus' subharmonics at the pet name.

"Collectors a mystery. Would like to study one... up close," Mordin said with a noisy inhale of breath, incinerating his target.

Shepard chuckled. "Maybe we'll bring one home with us," she suggested reaching over her cover with a warp field then an immediate snap off of her overload to another Harbinger that had 'assumed control' of a nearby Collector.

Garrus sniped the offending Harbinger, finishing it off as Mordin sniffed again, "Live specimen... problematic."

"Yeah, you could say that," Tali quipped, taking out her own target with her shotgun.

"I'm sure Ferguson would love a brother," Garrus chuckled.

"I'd need to get a bigger habit trail," she mused.

Shepard spotted an interface lit up green in the distance as she neared the end of the open area. Curious what she would find, she glanced over her shoulder to be sure there were no Collectors flanking her and then climbed up to the level above. A Collector ahead of her went down writhing to a warp field provided by Jack and Garrus grumbled. "Yeah that's right, Vakarian. I just saved your girlfriend," Jack snarked.

Shepard turned and winked at Garrus and his mandibles fluttered in annoyance. She jogged ahead and Legion's voice clicked over her comm. "Pathing failure. There is an obstruction in the tunnel."

Her team caught up as Thane downed a final Collector and Garrus pointed. "There, by the ventilation shaft. That valve should open the gate."

"Coming Legion," she assured it rushing to the valve and tinkering with the interface. She quickly hacked the release and mapped Legion's trail to the doors. As the Geth passed through the now opened gate, she grumbled. "There are seven more of those along the way. We need to pick up the pace if we want Legion to get through without boiling."

"Yes, temperatures in tunnel... problematic," Mordin sniffed as they continued ahead.

Around a blind corner, Shepard spotted another valve guarded by several Collectors. She narrowed her eyes and took a calculated risk to get there as quickly as possible. She drew in her biotic energy and fired off a charge, landing herself in the midst of the group of Collectors, knocking them out of the way so she could hit the release and let Legion through. While Legion announced it was stuck again, Shepard's team distracted the Collectors while she worked the release, freeing Legion to continue then running a short hacking program to set up the rest of the 6 valves to open with one touch.

They continued in much the same fashion, the Collectors buzzing in from over head, flying down like the worst moths she had ever seen. Her skin was crawling by the time they hit the last valve release. "We're at the rendezvous, but we're pinned down. We've _got_ to get those doors open!" Jacob called over the comms, the heat of battle raging in the static. Shepard punched the release as she backed past it, firing at their own river of Collector troops.

She kicked at the still blocked door and shouted. "Come in! Legion, Jacob you guys there?"

"Look out! Seeker swarms!" Jacob called out to his people and Shepard panicked, turning away from the door to help her people hold off the attackers.

"We're in position!" she shouted over the comm. "We need this door open, now!"

"Go! We'll cover you," Jacob's voice ordered amidst the cacophony of gunfire.

"The door has malfunctioned. Path blocked," Legion relayed as it apparently worked against the security of the door lock. Finally after what felt like an eternity the door whooshed open behind her and she signaled everyone inside. She made certain they were all through before ducking in herself. "Complete," Legion said.

"Here they come!" Shepard shouted as the Collectors neared the still open door. Legion knelt on the floor beside the console, frantically working its synthetic fingers over the interface. "Fall back!"

Jacob's team moved up beside them. "Suppression fire! Don't let anyone through!" he shouted.

They all kept the enemy at bay until the door finally slammed closed. Shepard took a breath and leaned her hands on her knees as her biotics faded. "Nice work, Legion. I knew I could count on you."

Miranda's voice interrupted her relief. "Shepard, you need to see this." She pushed up from her knees and turned to face what they'd walked in on. They'd come upon the main corridor. The ceiling reached up so high that they would never be able to see all of the way up. It was endless. Shepard gaped at the sheer number of the pods the Collectors used to kidnap the colonists in stasis. They lined the walls, stacked on top of each other, numbering in the thousands. Disturbingly enough, most of them were empty. She moved up to rub a layer of moisture from one of the closest pods. "Looks like one of the missing colonists." Miranda said as they stared in at the young woman. She looked relatively unharmed and Shepard felt a momentary flash of hope for her abducted crew.

"There's more... over here," Garrus announced moving over to stand in front of a few pods one of which Shepard saw Kelly Chambers suspended in, her eyes closed.

A hissing noise drew Shepard's attention back to the pod with the colonist in it. Suddenly, the woman's eyes fluttered open and she glanced frantically around at Shepard and the rest of her people gawking in at her. "My God, she's still alive!" Shepard shouted, watching as the woman's skin began to seemingly melt away. Muffled screams came out of the pod as the woman pounded on the surface, trying to escape. Shepard grabbed at the sides of the pod, trying to get her fingers beneath the edges to rip the thing open. The woman continued to scream, Shepard refusing to watch as she melted away. There was nothing Shepard could do in time, the colonist was lost. She had been too late. "Get them out of there! Hurry!" She shouted, pointing to the nearby row where their abducted crew slept in stasis inside their own pods. She moved away from the newly emptied pod and ran to pry open some of the others. Garrus and Grunt pounded their guns against the clear outer 'windows' of the pods, cracking them open with force. Everyone else took a pod each, prying them open as quickly as they could, the crew dropping out one by one as they were ripped out of the stasis the pods were keeping them in. The last pod to be opened was Dr. Chakwas. Shepard caught the woman as she fell boneless out of the pod, lying her gently down on the ground. "Dr. Chakwas are you alright?"

The rest of the crew slowly made it to their feet, dazed and confused, but alive. "Shepard?" Chakwas said softly, frowning up at her. "You... you came for us."

"No one gets left behind," she said with a relieved smile as her frantic heart slowed. She reached down and offered the doctor a hand up. The older woman took the offered help and stumbled slightly as she regained her footing.

"Thank God you got here in time," Kelly said, limping over toward them. She must have been injured when she was abducted, favoring her left ankle. "A few more seconds and... I don't even want to think about it."

"The colonists were... processed. Those swarms of little robots, they... melted their bodies into grey liquid and pumped it through these tubes." Chakwas pointed up to the ceiling where several lines of pipes ran along the length of the room.

Shepard scanned the pipes, following the liquid as it sloshed toward the center of the station. "Why are they doing this? What are they doing with our genetic material?" Shepard spat, disgusted. She clenched her fists, rage at the Collector's calling her biotics back to the surface. She felt like ripping every single one of them apart with her bare hands.

"I don't know," Chakwas said, the relief in her voice palpable. "I'm just glad you got here before it happened to us." The rest of the crew nodded, Gabby turning her head into Ken's shoulder as he comforted her with a gentle arm around her shoulders.

"So are we," Miranda said in a surprisingly sympathetic voice. "But we still have a job to do. We've done well so far, Let's hope we can finish the job."

Shepard pressed her comm channel to the Normandy open. "Joker, can you get a fix on our position?"

"Roger that, Commander." Joker's voice was fuzzy, layered in static, but readable. "All those tubes lead into the main control room right above you. The route is blocked by a security door, but there's another chamber that runs parallel to the one you're in."

"I cannot recommend that," EDI interjected. "Thermal emissions suggest the chamber is overrun with seeker swarms. Mordin's countermeasure cannot protect you against so many at once."

Shepard shuddered at the thought of passing through any swarm of bugs, let alone the flying, stinging monstrosities that froze your body making you into easy prey."What about biotics?" she asked staring down at her glowing fists and taking a breath to reign in the anger and save her amp power for when they needed it. "Could we create a biotic field to keep them from getting near us?"

"Yes," Samara responded immediately. "I think it may be possible. I wouldn't be able to protect everyone, but we might be able to get a small team through if they stayed close."

"I could do it, too. In theory, any biotic could handle it. Shepard, who do you want to maintain the field?" Miranda offered. Jack snorted indignantly, crossing her arms over her small breasts.

Shepard glanced around at all of the biotics on her team. She was certain they all could handle it, but there was still the issue of burning out. Both Samara and Jack had the strength and stamina to maintain the field for much longer than even she could. Deciding to lend Samara to the other team just in case, she said, "Jack and I will take a small team through the seeker swarms. The rest of you provide a diversion by going through the main passage. We'll open the security doors from the other side and meet you there."

"I'll keep the defenders busy while you slip in the back," Jacob agreed, offering up his, so far exemplary, leadership.

She nodded her agreement. "What about me and the rest of the crew, Shepard?" Chakwas reminded her. "We're in no shape to fight."

"Commander, we have enough systems back online to do a pickup, but we'd have to land back from your position," Joker suggested.

"We can't afford to go back, Shepard. Not now," Miranda protested As much as she hated it, the woman was right.

"You'll never make it without help. I'll send someone with you," Shepard decided, glancing at Mordin. He was a doctor after all. If any medical problems slowed them down, he and Chakwas could both handle things.

With a nod of his head, Mordin fiddled with his omnitool and said, "Joker. Will need coordinates for landing zone." After moments, his omnitool pinged with the coordinates and they started off down a path that spiraled away back towards where they came in. Shepard patted Kelly on her shoulder as Rupert helped the Yeoman to limp after the rest.

"We've all got our assignments. Let's move out," Shepard announced, pointing to Garrus and Tali to join her and Jack.

They filtered apart, Jacob's team heading down the main corridor to create their distraction while Shepard led her people into the tunnels that she could hear buzzing before they even dropped down into the mess. Jack dropped in first, immediately calling her biotics and raising a giant dome over her head that blocked the swarms of insects from touching her. Shepard, Garrus and Tali dropped into the dome and Shepard glanced up to the ceiling which was blotted out by the sheer amount of buzzing insects. "Keep up if you wanna live!" Jack grunted under the effort of holding the giant dome aloft and started off down the corridor.

The seekers hummed over the dome as they moved, going so far as to block out their communications with the other team. All she heard every so often was Jacob coming through with a congratulatory word or two for a good shot from one of his people. Shepard was proud of the man. He'd taken to his role quite easily and was friendly enough that the others listened to him almost as well as they listened to her. "You alright up there, Shepard?" Garrus hummed, his comforting tone almost drowned out by the buzzing of the Seekers.

"The faster we're away from these damn bugs, the better I'll feel," she grumbled, pushing ahead, hating that Jack was keeping a fairly slow pace.

The biotic in question chuckled, "You're scared of bugs, Shepard?"

"I'm not _scared_ ," Shepard corrected indignantly as Tali chuckled.

"You've never seen her with Rachni in her hair," Garrus teased. "I didn't know our fearless leader was capable of shrieking, but I was proven wrong."

Jack cracked up laughing, her field pulling backward as she moved her arms. Shepard stopped in her tracks to stay inside the dome and a seeker buzzed past her face. She shuddered. "Let's just go," she sighed.

"Incoming," Tali announced a short while later.

They were forced to stop while Jack took cover, vulnerable as long as she held up the dome. Harbinger seemed to be getting more insistent as they progressed, inhabiting more and more of the Collector corpses almost as soon as they dropped them. "THIS HURTS YOU!" it taunted, infuriating Shepard.

"Let's go, Commander!" Jack shouted through gritted teeth, after they'd cleared the area.

They were forced to stop twice more as the so far absent husks finally showed their faces. Shepard threw shockwave after shockwave at the scurrying monstrosities, directing Garrus and Tali at the scion further ahead that threw its own freezing shockwaves at them, wiping out everyone's shields. "At least we haven't run into one of those big flying crab things," Garrus shouted as he blew the head off the armored scion.

"Oh, shut up!" Shepard shouted. "If one shows up now, I'm blaming you." Her final shockwave whipped across the field and broke up the last of the husks. They came up out of cover and Jack started ahead, her field wavering. Even she was running out of biotic juice. They had to hurry.

"I always expect the worst," he chuckled as he fell in closer to Jack so she could bring the field in closer to them.

"Don't I know it..." she grinned, shooting him a wink.

"Well, I was pleasantly surprised to be proven wrong," he grinned in return.

"I really don't need to know this," Jack grumbled.

"Agreed," Tali said, her head pulling back. Shepard imagined the look of disgust on her face and laughed as they jogged forward.

Shepard threw shockwaves at the few husks still climbing up from the lower reaches of the area, Jack in full breakdown mode. They went as fast as they could and finally she spotted the door. "We need to... hurry.. Shepard," Jack growled, the barrier flickering.

They ran at full tilt, not even stopping to finish off the collectors attempting to swarm them from all sides. A few poorly aimed biotics and some tech shots from the three of them got them to the doorway without being overwhelmed. They passed the threshold and while Tali fiddled with the controls, Jack gathered the biotic energy in the dome back into herself and with a shout, threw it all outwards throwing the crowd of Collectors far into the distance. The door slammed closed. They were safe. Shepard breathed a short sigh of relief as Jack knuckled a small stream of blood from her upper lip. "You good?" she asked, knowing the signs of a overworked amp.

"I'm good," Jack nodded, determination in her scowl. Shepard should have known better than to ask.

The static in their comms cleared and Shepard heard Jacob frantically calling for her. "Repeat! Shepard, do you copy?!"

"I copy, what's your position?" She called stepping further away from the door near the seeker swarms for a better signal.

"We're pinned down at the door, taking heavy fire!" He shouted.

"We're coming!" she assured him, taking cover at the edge of the door. "Just hang on." To Tali she shouted, "Get this door open!"

The Quarian quickly moved her fingers over the console and the door shot open. Shepard spun to look out at the situation and began firing at the Collectors as the team backed in the door. She released a shockwave as Jacob passed through the door and Tali slammed it closed behind him. He cried out and slammed into the far wall, clutching his side. Shepard jogged over to him but he stood and brushed off the minor graze wound. "I'm okay. Just need a second to catch my breath," he said straightening his posture.

She smiled proudly at him and patted his shoulder, moving to the rest of the crew. Everyone was still in one piece surprisingly. "Joker," she opened her Normandy comm. "Are you at the rendezvous point?"

"I'm here, Commander. Chakwas and the rest of the crew just showed up," Joker confirmed.

"Mordin's group just arrived, Shepard. No casualties," EDI seconded, drawing a relieved sigh from Shepard.

"Excellent," Miranda said, a sigh of her own escaping her lips. "Now, let's make it count. EDI, what's our next step?"

"There should be some nearby platforms that will take you to the main control console. From there, you can overload the system and destroy the base," the AI purred.

Shepard glanced around and recognized one of the platforms like they had encountered on the Collector ship. She hopped up on the higher level and turned to the rest of the crew. Before she could give an order, Joker broke through over the comms again. "Commander, you've got a problem. Hostiles massing just outside the door. Won't be long until they bust through."

She swallowed the lump of frustration in her throat and said, "A rearguard could defend this position and keep the Collectors from overwhelming us."

"Pick a team to go with you, Shepard. Everyone else can bunker down here and cover your back," Miranda offered smartly.

Shepard nodded and signaled Garrus and Tali to stick with her. The two climbed up beside her and Garrus smiled. "I'm ready, Commander."

"Me too," Tali said with a cock of her head, one hand on her hip.

"Anything to say before we do this?" Miranda grinned, knowing Shepard couldn't resist a pep talk.

Shepard cleared her throat. "The Collectors, the Reapers... they aren't a threat to us. They're a threat to everything... everyone. Those are the lives we're fighting for. That's the scale." She paused to begin a confident pacing across the platform as she took a moment to glance at everyone. "It's been a long journey, and no one's coming out without scars." She winked at Garrus who fluttered his mandibles in return. "But it all comes down to this moment. We win or lose it all in the next few minutes. Make me proud. Make _yourselves_ proud." She finished with a reassuring grin.

"We'll do our best," Miranda agreed for everyone. "Good luck, Shepard."

EDI detached the platform from its place with a hiss of hydraulics and it began to fly away from the rest of the crew. Shepard threw a silent prayer back to her people as they glided away. She rolled her shoulders and faced the direction they were heading, checking her pistol. "This has been a long time coming, Shepard," Garrus said, stepping up beside her and dropping his hand on her shoulder. His subvocals were in full hum mode as the nerves of the day affected them all. She closed her eyes and accepted the comfort he offered.

"I'm glad you're here, Big Guy," she said as the platform slowed to park at a junction and other similar platforms flew in from all sides with enemies riding atop them.

Tali cleared her throat. "What am I, chopped Varren?"

Shepard chuckled, taking cover as the Collectors began firing on them. "I may be the better shot, but at least you're better looking," Garrus said to Tali as he sniped his first Collector.

"I dunno," Shepard said with a grin, tapping out an overload on her omnitool. "What _do_ you look like under that helmet, Tali?"

"If we make it out alive, I'll send you a picture," she said, releasing her combat drone.

"Something to live for, then," Shepard joked.

"I would have thought you might be holding on for a certain Turian with no romantic skills," Garrus chuckled.

"There are other reasons to keep you around other than your romantic skills," she purred. Tali groaned and Garrus laughed again. "Hey, you guys are dirty. I was talking about his aim." she said with a throaty chuckle.

"Sure you were," Tali said with suggestion in her voice.

Shepard vaulted over her cover to move ahead and was slapped with the fiery attack that came from a Harbinger. "Yeah, yeah, this hurts me," she grumbled, ducking behind fresh cover to repair her shields.

"Perhaps looking before you leap might be prudent, Shepard," Garrus warned from just a little farther away than he had been.

"What's the fun in that?" she asked, her shields reforming around her. She peered up over the cover and counted four Collectors, one of which was playing puppet for Harbinger. She glared at the glowing avatar and called her biotics, throwing a warp at it.

"THERE IS NO PAIN. THERE IS NO FEAR," it boomed as it absorbed the warp, it's barrier slightly damaged.

"God it's so cocky," she growled and threw another warp to finish off the barrier.

"MY ATTACKS WILL TEAR YOU APART, SHEPARD. DESTROY ONE AND A HUNDRED WILL REPLACE IT."

"It's homed in on you, Shepard," Garrus warned from his better vantage point.

She aimed her pistol over the cover and took three shots at the approaching nightmare. "Take out the rest. I've got this," she called as she noticed the other three slowly closing in. She glanced to her left to quickly assess Garrus then to the right to see Tali was alright. Her head whipped back around as her eyes caught up with what she had seen. "Garrus! Husk on your 7!"

He spun, just before the thing could hop on his back. It instead landed on his chest knocking him off balance. She threw one more warp toward the weakened Harbinger and jetted for him. Vaulting over where he'd been in cover she came upon him with the husk on top of him as he fought it off as best he could. She kicked the thing in it's gut, knocking it aside then nailed it in the forehead twice before it could recover. Her shields were getting peppered as she spent too much time out of cover. She reached down to help Garrus to his feet, her visor telling her he was unharmed. Just as he got to his feet, her shields fell with the awful broken glass sound. "Get down!" he shouted, but it was too late. One of the fiery balls of Harbinger attacks hit her square in the back. She fell to her knees, gasping as the force of the impact overwhelmed her. She vaguely noticed her armor on fire as she fought to catch her breath, feeling like she'd taken a punch to the gut.

Garrus was kneeling beside her, patting out the flames on her back. "Shepard!" Tali called out.

"Take that thing down!" Garrus shouted as the last of the flames went out and she collapsed to her stomach as the wrenching feeling unraveled from her chest. "Shepard?" he asked, panic clear in his subvocals.

"I'm... okay," she managed, reaching feebly for her omnitool to repair her shields. "If I never have to do that again, it'll be too soon." She coughed as the air returned to her lungs. "Christ on a cracker, that hurt!"

"You sure you're alright?" he asked again, his hand not leaving her shoulder as she sat up, pressing her burned armor to the half wall they were safe behind.

She nodded, touching her fingers to his scarred mandible. "I'm good. I promise. Just gotta catch my breath. Help Tali kill those fuckers." She pushed him away and he followed her orders, shooting her glances every few seconds as her shields recovered and she figured out how to breathe again.

After a moment, she was back on her feet, helping them finish off the rest of the attackers. Once she saw the all clear, she signaled them ahead to one of the furthest platforms that had docked with theirs. As EDI took control to guide them further into the base, Shepard kicked the corpse of a scion off the edge of the platform. "This is it. All the tubes lead to this spot," she pointed out. "EDI, what can you tell us? What are they doing?"

"The tubes are feeding into some kind of super structure. It is emitting both organic and non-organic energy signatures. Given these readings, it must be massive." The AI paused to gather some more information. "Shepard, if my calculations are correct, the super structure... is a Reaper." Shock registered in the AI's sultry voice.

They hovered out from the tunnel they'd been traveling through and Shepard's jaw hit the floor. The gigantic room opened up to unimaginable lengths and suspended directly in the middle of it all was a massive construction that from top to bottom probably measured at least a kilometer and a half. It reminded Shepard of the old Earth vids about zombies. If the zombies had been massive and made of metal. It looked incomplete. The head was similarly shaped to a human's aside from the fact that it had three eyes. One on the right and two conjoined on the left. The arms lifted up and out to the sides where they were held aloft with giant syringe like tubes that were funneling the liquefied colonists into the thing's 'body'. The arms had no hands, simply stopping about mid forearm and extending down further in several tentacle like extensions. It's chest was similar, the metal spine showing from the bottom of the ribs down. Dead center of the chest was a large red glowing light that probably served as the firing chamber of the completed Reaper. "Not just any Reaper," Shepard said in awe and disgust. "A human Reaper."

"Precisely," EDI confirmed. Their platform connected with another just in front of the protoreaper, stopping hard and jostling them. The fact that EDI had allowed the simple miscalculation to cause any jostling attested to her outrage. Even the AI was pissed about what was happening here. "It appears the Collectors have processed tens of thousands of humans. Significantly more will be required to complete the Reaper." The tubes connected to the arms pulled back, sucking in more of the glowing orange liquid and then injected it into the skeleton.

"This _thing_ is an abomination," Shepard growled her fist clenching around her pistol. "EDI, how do we destroy it?"

"The large tubes injecting the fluid are a weak structural link. Destroying them should cause the supports to collapse and the Reaper to fall."

Shepard studied the frequency of the tubes injecting the fluid. All four opened at once but quickly closed again. They would have to time their shots. Before she could relay the plan, they were set upon by more Collectors. "Time your shots and watch your selves," she shouted as the Collectors approached on more floating platforms that connected to theirs.

Garrus helpfully shouted out every time the tubes came open, allowing Shepard to quickly take aim and shoot at the reinforced glass before they slammed closed again. Finally they were down to the final tube, the others having exploded under their combined efforts over a bit of time. The Collector troops felt endless. Each time they took care of a group. Another platform would swoop in to ruin the day. Shepard noticed they had two enemies left, grouped off to their left. Scanning the field for any more, she took her chance. "Charging!" she shouted as she called her biotics.

"Dammit, Shepard!" Garrus cursed as she took off, the biotic attack landing her between the two remaining Collectors and knocking them off the platform. He growled one last time as she smirked and mock saluted him with two fingers. She heard the tubes opening up above her head and he glared at her from his cover and took aim with his sniper rifle.

"Oh no, don't!" she shouted, but it was too late. He spitefully took the shot and the glass shattered above her. He had aimed with his visor so none of the glass fell on her, but she wasn't fast enough to dodge out of the way of the fluid. It rained down on top of her lower body and legs as she attempted to escape. "Ugh," she shouted. "Punishment is due for that, Vakarian!"

"Maybe that'll teach you to quit charging into my line of fire," he smirked as she shook the goop off her legs. "I'll take whatever _punishment_ you can dole out, Shepard."

The broken tube snapped away from where it clung by no more than a thread and directly behind her, the Reaper fell down into the abyss with a metallic whine. "You're lucky you're so damn sexy," she grumbled, climbing over the rows of consoles and half walls to get back to the main platform that had been hovering in front of the Reaper.

"I figured as much," he cooed, as he and Tali joined her to stand in front of the main power source buried in a containment module in the floor.

"Shepard to ground team! Status report," she called out over the comms.

"It's Thane. We are holding, but they keep coming. A quick exit is preferable," the Drell answered as the battle raged noisily in the background.

She nodded. "Head to the Normandy. Joker, prep the engines. I'm about to overload this place and blow it sky high."

"Roger that, Commander," Joker replied quickly. She knelt down and tapped out a hack on her omnitool to release the clamps and allow her to pull the module upwards so she could set up the detonation sequence. She couldn't shake the feeling of dread that had started to prickle a the back of her neck as she worked. Garrus' subvocals weren't helping. He could feel it too apparently. Tali stood fidgeting beside her, her shotgun still in her hands. "Uh, Commander? I've got an incoming signal from the Illusive Man. EDI's patching it through."

Tali lowered her shotgun and lifted her omnitool to accept the holoprojection of the Illusive Man. Shepard continued her work on the newly exposed command module. Was he really bothering her now? They were so close to being done. "Shepard, You've done the impossible," he said proudly.

"I'm not finished here yet. This base is ten minutes from extinction." She growled, the unease making her grumpy.

"Wait, I have a better option," he insisted. She rolled her eyes, not deigning to stop what she was doing and look at him. "I'm looking at the schematics EDI uploaded. A timed radiation pulse would kill the remaining Collectors, but leave the machinery and technology intact. This is our chance, Shepard. They were building a Reaper. That knowledge... that framework... could save us."

Shepard clenched her fists, standing up from her work and spinning to look him in the face. Was he serious? "They liquefied people! Turned them into something horrible. We have to destroy the base!"

"Don't be short sighted," he said calmly. "Our best chance against the Reapers is to turn their own resources against them. They were working directly with the Collectors. Who knows what information is buried there? This base is a gift. We can't just destroy it!"

"You're completely ruthless!" she argued. "The next thing I know, you'll be wanting to grow your own Reaper."

"My goal is to save humanity from the Reapers. At any cost. I've never hidden that from you. Imagine how many lives could be saved if we keep this base intact and use its knowledge to thwart the Reapers... Imagine the lives that will be lost if we don't." His response was anything but reassuring.

"No matter what kind of technology we might find, it's not worth it," she insisted through gritted teeth.

"Shepard, you died fighting for what you believed. I brought you back so you could _keep_ fighting. Some would say what we did to you was going too far, but look what you've accomplished. I didn't discard you because I knew your value. Don't be so quick to discard this facility. Think of the potential!"

"We'll fight and win without it. I won't let fear compromise who I am," She turned away from the projection, finished debating. She knelt back down by the module and continued her work.

"Think about what's at stake. About everything Cerberus has done for you. You..." Tali shut down the desperate pleading.

"Bosh'tet," Tali mumbled as Garrus handed Shepard a small timed detonation grenade.

"You sure about this, Shepard?" he asked softly.

"I'm doing what I came here to do." She finished up her splicing and set the grenade on the module then slid it back into the floor. "Let's move. We've got ten minutes before the reactor overloads and blows this whole station apart."

She stood from her crouch and just as they were moving to their original platform for a ride out of the core, the whole floor began to rumble. "Keelah," Tali whispered as the source of the quake became apparent.

Apparently dropping the protoreaper into the abyss of the ship had woken it up. The thing grabbed hold of the platform where Garrus had dropped the goop on top of Shepard and clawed it's way back up to stare at then with glowing red eyes. "Everyone get down!" Shepard shouted as the abomination opened it's mouth, the sphere on its chest brightened and a plasma burst charged to shoot from it's mouth.

"We can't get out until we take that thing down," Garrus shouted from his cover.

Shepard cursed and pulled the Collector Plasma Rifle from her back. When she tried to activate it, she cursed again, realizing that the weapon had been ruined when she was hit by Harbinger's fire ball. She tossed the weapon on the ground and pulled out her pistol again. Glancing over her shoulder to get a better look at potential weak spots, her visor noted that the eyes would be the perfect part to take out. "Go for the optics, Chiktikka!" Tali called out, directing her drone.

"You named your drone?" Shepard called out, targeting the eyes with her incinerate. Then shooting into them again while the thing held still enough to charge it's laser attack.

"So? You named a Geth," she chided as she unloaded a few shots with her shotgun.

"I did," Shepard admitted with a shrug as Garrus groaned.

"I told you it was Ferguson all over again," he accused.

"Oh no, guys! Do you think Ferguson survived the relay crash?" Shepard asked with concern.

"Not the time, Shepard," Tali said, ducking below her cover as the lasers fired again.

The thing was good at flailing about randomly, making aiming a task. Every time it dipped below the platform, it came back up to tower over them and even used its dangling spine to break apart the platforms piece by piece until there was not much left for them to stand on.They kept up the battering of the Protoreaper as time flitted by. With about 3 minutes to spare, its head caught fire after she unleashed one last incinerate into its eyes. The thing let out a loud metallic whine of distress as it let go of the platform it was clinging to and used its other arm to smack the one they were standing on in one last attempt to take them down with it. The platform instead of breaking spun out of control, tipping nearly completely to the side. Tali let out a yelp as she fell and slid down toward the edge. Shepard acted without thought, throwing herself down on her stomach to slide after Tali, reaching her hand out to grab her before she went over the edge. They clasped hands then Tali's hand slipped out of hers. As the girl slipped over the side, Shepard grabbed again and caught her wrist latching on to a bit of console that was still intact to hold onto the still wobbling platform. She pulled Tali back up and the platform whipped across the room, spinning wildly then slammed into an outcropping that led somewhere else in the base. Shepard kicked Tali out of the way as she watched a bit of one of the other platforms falling toward her. She threw her arms over her head and the heavy plating slammed her down into the ground. When everything finally went still and she deemed it safe to move, she pulled her arms and legs painstakingly underneath her to push up the debris and slide out from under the weight, again thanking her muscle weave for the added strength.

Lying at the edge of the platform, she spotted Garrus motionless, his right arm and leg dangling over the side. "Garrus!" she called out, her broken visor unable to tell her if he was alive. She jetted to him, rolling him over and he looked at her, offering a smile.

"I'm okay," She helped him up and the glanced around, looking for Tali. She spotted the Quarian pinned under a similar plating piece that had fallen on her.

She jogged over and lifted the heavy piece of debris off of Tali then helped her to her feet as well. They were alive, but they still needed to make it out of the base. Time was running out. "Do you copy? Commander? Come on, Shepard, don't leave me hanging. Do you copy?" Joker's voice came lightly over the busted comm unit in her visor.

"I'm here, Joker. Did the ground team make it?" she called out hoping her mic was still functional.

A ragged sigh from Joker as he heard her voice. "All survivors on board. We're just waiting on you."

Before Joker finished his sentence, Shepard heard the tell tale buzzing of the seekers gaining on them. She glanced up and quickly pushed the others toward the tunnel ahead. She raced away from the swarm gathering in the air behind them. "HUMAN, YOU'VE CHANGED NOTHING!" Harbinger raged from seemingly everywhere, its voice deafened her. "YOUR SPECIES HAS THE ATTENTION OF THOSE INFINITELY YOUR GREATER!" She fired her pistol blindly over her shoulder as she ran as fast as she could toward freedom. A swatch of daylight ahead was her goal and she transmitted the coordinates to Joker so he could come get them. "THAT WHICH YOU KNOW AS REAPERS ARE YOUR SALVATION THROUGH DESTRUCTION."

As they ran, the station began to fall apart, the explosion of the protoreaper causing a domino effect all over. She watched Garrus and Tali seemingly miles ahead of her as she looked over her shoulder to see more Collector troops trying to shoot her down before she could escape. She dodged gun fire and seekers as bits of the base fell around her, threatening to crush her. Garrus paused ahead to glance behind him and she shouted him along. He turned and continued with a frustrated growl, picking Tali up as she stumbled. The Normandy lifted up from below the edge of the station and Shepard had never been more relieved to see the ship in her life. The port side airlock opened and Joker stood inside brandishing an assault rifle. He mowed down the Collectors chasing her and Garrus and Tali jumped onto the ship to stand beside him, adding their own cover fire. Shepard ran with everything she had and watched as the platform she should have been able to jump to the ship from fell under the weight of a particularly large chunk of debris. She gathered her wits and narrowed her eyes, hoping that she was as good at geometry as her visor was. At top speed she kicked off from the closest edge to the ship. She flew through the air, barely grabbing hold of the floor of the airlock. "I got you," Garrus said, bending to take hold of her hand and pull her up into the airlock. She fell into his arms, breathing heavily as her heart pounded with adrenaline. The airlock closed and Joker slammed open the inner door as EDI began a countdown.

"Yeah, I get the gist of it EDI, Hold on!" Joker shouted, cutting off her countdown at 8 and dropping back into his seat to pilot them away.

Shepard counted down in her head and when she reached one, still huddled in Garrus' arms, the Normandy shook as the base exploded behind them. Joker frantically moved his arms jumping the Normandy to FTL and escaping the enormous shockwave just as it was about to lick at the tail of the ship. Tali collapsed into a seat to Joker's right, sighing inside her helmet and Garrus took Shepard's chin in his fingers and turned her head to him. Touching his forehead to hers, he mumbled. "That was way too close."

She closed her eyes, returning the pressure with her forehead. "We made it. Let's not think about how close it was." He hugged her tighter briefly until she pulled away. "I need to have a chat with Illusive Asshole," she said walking casually out of the bridge and through the CIC to the comm room. The hallway was in shambles and she picked her way through the damaged pieces of Normandy. She lifted a rafter out of her way and leaned it against the broken doorway.

Sighing at the work it was going to take to fix her ship, she ran her fingers over the holo projector. Surprisingly, the table dipped into the floor and the scanner raised up around her. With her arms crossed, she waited as the call connected. "Shepard, You're making a habit of costing me more than time and money." The Illusive Man spat after he appeared in front of her.

"I'm sorry, I'm having trouble hearing you. I'm getting a lot of bullshit on this line," She growled in return.

"Don't try my patience," he warned and she scoffed. He didn't scare her in the least. "The technology from that base could have secured human dominance in the galaxy. Against the Reapers and beyond."

"Human dominance, or just Cerberus?" she asked, dragging her opinion on the truth into the light.

"Strength for Cerberus is strength for every human," he sighed, uncrossing his legs and standing to approach her. "Cerberus _is_ humanity. I should have known you'd choke on the hard decisions. Too idealistic from the start."

"I know what you are," she accused, pointing a finger at him. "and the price of dealing with you. We do things my way from now on. Harbinger is coming and he won't be alone. I'm going to make sure we're ready when they get here! You can fall in line or step aside, but don't get in my way."

"You're sure that's what you want?" he asked with what sounded like fear in his voice. "You're taking a hell of a risk, Shepard."

"I'm done talking. Joker, lose this channel," she turned on her heel and stepped out of the projector into the reality of her busted up, limping ship. She felt good. Telling off the Illusive Man had quickly made its way to top of her bucket list. Being able to do it after escaping a suicide mission with everyone accounted for was a massive boost to her recent slip in morale. She felt lighter as she made her way back out to the CIC and the elevator to get up to her cabin and out of her broken armor.

"Do you really think you're escaping without a visit to the med bay, Shepard," Garrus purred from just inside the armory door. He stepped out as she pushed the call button on the elevator rapidly to get away. He grabbed her hands and chuffed his annoyance at her. "Turn around." She sighed and exposed her back to him.

"I'm fine, really." She assured him just as he gently touched a bit of her skin that had apparently been bruised by the falling plating. She hissed and pulled away from him.

"Sure," he said sarcastically. "You might have a broken rib, Shepard. You got hit pretty hard by that heavy bulkhead and your armor is fully burned away back here."

She sighed and he nodded his head toward the elevator as the doors opened. "Fine," she grumbled, stalking into the car and stepping aside so he could join her. He reached around her and pressed the button for the crew deck.

* * *

 

Repairs were underway and the Normandy limped through the Omega system, looking for dry dock. A piece of bad news was itching in the back of Shepard's mind. She was dreading telling Garrus because the outcome most likely meant she'd be locked away for a very long time. Her finger hovered over the comm button at her desk as she bit her lip in indecision. Her broken hamster cage sat in the bin beside her and Ferguson was no where to be found. She had been relieved at least to not have found a body. The hamster was loose somewhere on the Normandy. She might never find him. Shaking off the distraction of thinking about Ferguson, she depressed the comm button. "Hey Big Guy. Could you come up to my cabin?"

"I'll be right there," he purred, a slight question in his voice.

She paced behind her desk while she waited. Finally, the door slid open and he stepped in, his usual swagger having returned after they survived the Collector Base. "Thanks for coming," she said pausing to drink him in.

"You know, I believe Chakwas warned you off of strenuous activity until your ribs healed," he said, approaching her and touching his forehead to hers.

She'd come to realize over the last few days that the small gesture was the Turian equivalent to a kiss. She closed her eyes, wishing she didn't need to say what she'd called him up to say. She sighed. "That's not why I called you up, although I wish it were."

He held her at arms length, studying her face. "Your heart is racing, Shepard. What's the matter?"

He guided her to the couch to sit down, holding both her hands, their knees touching as he faced her to listen like he was so good at doing. The expression on his face made it all the more difficult to spit out the words. "After... After Arathot, Admiral Hackett personally debriefed me on the destruction of the Alpha relay..."

When she paused and glanced away, he clicked his mandibles to draw her gaze back to his face. "What is so hard to say, Shepard?" he asked, reaching up and brushing some of her hair behind her ear.

She took in a deep breath and released it in a rush of words. "I promised the Alliance I would accept the punishment for my actions after I dealt with the Collectors." She bit her lip, waiting for the argument.

He sighed. "And now that we're still alive, the Alliance expects you to turn yourself in..." he concluded.

She clutched his hands tightly. "If I had a choice, I would say screw the Alliance, but if I ever want to show my face anywhere without being a fugitive, I need to go to Earth and turn myself over for court martial."

He hummed deep in his chest, staring off into the far side of her room. She wished he would say something. After what felt like and eternity with her heart beating in her throat, she turned to glance at her. "I understand, Shepard." Nothing in his subharmonics revealed that he was upset. She frowned and he hung his head. "I have something I need to do, too. I should go back to Palaven and try to convince someone important that the Reapers are coming."

"Do you think they'll listen?" she asked reaching up to turn his face to her.

He chuckled softly. "No, but since when has that stopped me causing a ruckus?"

"True enough," she joined his laughter.

 


	25. Darkness Descends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Six months after the Collector Base, shit hits the fan.

It had been six long months since the Collector base. Six months since she'd had contact with anyone she knew. After her court martial, Shepard had been discharged, grounded and placed under what amounted to house arrest at a military facility in Vancouver. Her days were spent holed up in a small efficiency apartment, guarded over by a beefy young Lieutenant named James Vega. The Lieutenant hardly spoke to her, keeping their relationship strictly professional and leaving her friendless and alone. She thought about Garrus constantly, wondering how he was doing on Palaven while she rotted away here. Her extranet access had been restricted like she was a child and she was not allowed any access to the outside world. She was lucky if they brought her a vid to watch or a book to read.

She stood early on a Sunday morning leaning against the glass of her floor length window and watching a young boy play in his back yard. He was laughing and running around with a toy space fighter ship. She smiled at the innocence, wishing her life could be so simple. While she was trapped in this hell hole, the Reapers were closing in on the galaxy and nobody wanted to believe her claims. The book she had been reading on her datapad dangled abandoned in her right hand. Behind her, the door to her 'cell' opened and her favorite Lieutenant stepped in wearing his usual Alliance t shirt and cargo uniform pants. His neck and arm tattoos peeked out from the t shirt on his mocha skin. His military haircut was stylishly slipped into a short feauhawk in the center of his head. His shirt bulged at the seems, straining over his bulky upper body as he saluted her after stepping in the room. "Commander."

"You're not supposed to call me that anymore, James," she chided, turning away from the window to face him, the sun glinting off his dog tags.

"Not supposed to salute you anymore, either." He offered up a respectful smile, the scars across his face standing out with the expression. "We gotta go. The defense committee wants to see you."

He turned to leave and she tossed her datapad on the foot of her bed as she eagerly followed after him. "Sounds important." She jogged to keep up as he walked quickly through the hallways. A lot of marines were rushing about for a Sunday morning and she asked, "What's going on?"

"Couldn't say," he admitted. "Just told me they needed you... now."

She paused her swift gait as she saw a welcome face approaching from the opposite direction. She cracked a grin and greeted her old Captain. "Anderson." The aging man approached her and shook her hand as James saluted him.

"Admiral."

While she'd been locked away, Anderson had taken matters into his own hands, trying to get proof of the Reapers to the galaxy. He'd turned his council position over to Udina and returned to the Alliance to a promotion and some pretty top secret assignments. She'd not been appraised of the details of the assignments, but the military service had given her old friend back his normal optimistic personality, leaving the struggling politician in the past.

"You look good, Shepard." Anderson commented as he started off back the way he'd come forcing them to follow. "Maybe a little soft around the edges." He patted her stomach jokingly. She reached up and touched her own gut. Was she getting fat? It had been a while since she'd run for her life. Maybe she needed to ask for a weight set for her room. "How're you holding up since being relieved of duty?"

"It's not so bad once you get used to the hot food and soft beds," she quipped. _The soft empty beds_.

"We'll get it sorted out," he assured her as they dodged the rush of people bustling around.

"What's going on? Why's everyone in such a hurry?" she asked, hoping Anderson had answers. Her adrenaline was starting to rise.

"Admiral Hackett's mobilizing the fleets," he explained as he continued to hurry toward a staircase that she knew led to the security checkpoint. "I'm guessing word's made it to Alliance command... Something big's headed our way."

She stopped short, one foot up on the bottom step as he jogged up ahead of her. "The Reapers?"

"We don't know," he shook his head, pausing to turn and face her. "Not for certain."

"What else could it be?" She asked, confidence swirling around her like an old friend and mixing with the unease of the warnings she'd been shouting for years being right.

"If I knew that..." he pursed his lips and shook his head again.

"You know we're not ready if it's them... Not by a long shot," she scolded. Her disapproval was not directed at him, and he knew it.

"Tell that to the defense committee," he said, turning and resuming his brisk pace up the stairs. She jogged up after him, taking the stairs two at a time to catch up.

"Unless we're planning to talk the Reapers to death, the committee is a waste of time," she mused.

"They're just scared," he chided. "None of them have seen what you've seen. We've all reviewed your reports, seen the data you collected, but it's all just theory to us. _You've_ been there... in the trenches, fighting them. You _know_ what they're capable of."

"Is that why they grounded me? Took away my ship?" she asked spitefully.

Anderson paused to waggle a finger at her. "You know that's not true. When you blew up the Batarian relay, hundreds of thousands of Batarians died."

"It was that or let the Reaper's walk through our back door!" she argued, the stress of the situation making her ornery.

"I know that, Shepard," Anderson agreed with her, sympathy softening his voice. He'd argued on her behalf during her trial. She shouldn't be shouting at him. "And so does the comittee. If it wasn't for that, you'd have been court-martialed and left to rot in the brig."

"That and your good word?" she said, apologizing with her tone.

"Yeah, I trust you Shepard, and so does the committee."

She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "I'm just a soldier, Anderson. I'm no politician."

"I don't need you to be either," he pointed out, beginning to walk again. She followed close behind. "I just need you to do whatever the hell it takes to help us stop the Reapers."

They passed through a glass door that led to the security checkpoint and a young female officer greeted them. "They're expecting you two, Admiral."

The young woman led them through the scanners and James paused behind her before they passed. "Good luck in there, Shepard." He offered his hand and she turned and took it, offering a smile in return. He shook, gently, as if he knew he was probably stronger than her, but she gripped his palm tightly and forced a harder shake on him, drawing a quirk of his lips.

She heard a familiar voice behind her and her grip slackened, making James regard her with a curious frown. Anderson and the officer had gotten ahead of her and the voice that greeted Anderson clenched her heart. James dropped her hand and she turned slowly, not having expected to see him. "Shepard?" His voice sounded like he was about as shocked as she felt.

"Kaidan?" she answered softly, still feeling a bit awkward as her eyes landed on him. She left James behind, forcing her legs to carry her to stand beside Anderson. Kaidan regarded her with curiosity and what looked like awe. She flushed under the scrutiny.

"How'd it go in there, Major?" Anderson asked.

Kaidan dragged his dark gaze away from her to regard Anderson while she fidgeted and forced her ears to listen to his answer instead of her heartbeat raging noisily in her chest. "Okay, I think. Hard to know. I'm just waiting for orders now." He shrugged.

She swallowed the lump in her throat and questioned him, "Major?"

"You hadn't heard?" Anderson asked, a little surprise in his tone.

"No, I'm a bit out of the loop these days," she admitted, slightly offended.

"Sorry," Kaidan said with a bit of regret in his tone. "Didn't mean to keep you out of the loop."

"I'm sure you had your reasons," she bit her lip, tearing her eyes from his gaze, knowing she had no right to expect anything from him after their parting conversation on Horizon. She'd moved on.

"Yeah, I suppose I did," he retorted at her brush off. "Still, it's good to see you." His voice was telling and she cringed.

She was spared having to continue the conversation that was quickly growing awkward when the officer that had been escorting them returned and called them into the committee chambers. Kaidan smiled and nodded at her as she passed by. She averted her gaze, not wanting to give him any ideas about their relationship. If they got a chance, she was going to need to sit him down and they were going to have to have a very serious and probably hurtful conversation.

* * *

 

The Alliance council chambers were the last place she felt like being. Curled up in a bed with Garrus at her back would have been a much more comfortable place for her. She took a moment to think about how he was doing on Palaven. If the Reapers were close to Earth, had they reached Palaven yet? Was he safe? She swallowed a small bit of nausea at the thought and approached the rounded dais where the collection of higher ups sat huddled over several screens that were also being transmitted over the collection of screens to the left of the large open room. "Admiral Anderson, Shepard," One of the committee greeted them as they stopped in front of the desk positioned in front of the gigantic windows that looked out over the heart of Vancouver. The sky was dark, making her think it might rain any minute.

"What's the situation?" she asked boldly.

"We were hoping you would tell us," another of the committee said humbly. She was approached on her right by a uniformed officer who handed her a datapad.

She glanced over the readings as one of the females on the committee spoke up. "The reports coming in are unlike anything we've seen. Whole colonies have gone dark. We've lost contact with everything beyond the Sol relay."

The humbler man drew her attention away from the datapad. "Whatever this is, its incomprehensibly powerful."

She scowled, dropping the data pad down by her leg, not needing to read it anymore. "You brought me here to confirm what you already know... The Reapers are here."

Her voice rang out across the large room, echoing over the walls as everyone tensed, looking to each other and mumbling. The fear of the soldiers all around her was palpable. Finally, the woman looked back to her. "Then... how do we stop them?"

"Stop them?" she chuckled wryly. "This isn't about strategy or tactics. This is about survival. The Reapers are more advanced than we are. More powerful. More intelligent. They don't fear us and they'll never take pity on us." She clenched the fist not holding the data pad and stepped forward.

"But there must be some way," the woman pleaded, apparently not liking that everything Shepard had been telling them for years was turning out to be true.

Shepard glanced around at all of the innocent, terrified faces in the room. "If we're going to have any chance at surviving this, we have to stand together." She knew it wasn't just humanity at stake here. The Reapers were coming for everyone.

"That's it? That's our plan?" The humble man had turned from humble to hopeless in seconds.

Before she could answer, the officer who'd escorted them called out from a station in front of the displays. "Admiral, we've lost contact with Luna base."

"The moon?" Anderson gasped. "They couldn't be that close already..."

"How'd they get past our defenses?" the female committee spoke again, surprise behind her voice.

"Sir, UK headquarters has a visual," the officer announced.

All heads turned to the collection of screens as Earth came under attack. News feeds and military helmet cams and civilian recordings flashed over the screen. Several Reapers were being spotted all over. Shepard looked on in horror as the massive machines landed on Humanity's planet and began to destroy everything in their path. "Why haven't we heard from Admiral Hackett?" Anderson whispered beside her.

"What do we do?" The committee directed their panicked question at her.

She tore her gaze from the destruction. "The only thing we can. We fight or we die," she said simply.

While the committee shook their heads at the answer they didn't want to hear, Anderson said, "We should get to the Normandy..."

She didn't have a chance to agree before an ominous rumbling sounded outside the giant windows. From out of the cover of gray clouds strands of red lightning flickered. Shepard had seen the red lightning before on the Citadel when they were fighting Saren. She had no chance to identify it before the tips of tentacles from a Reaper peeked through the cloud cover as it descended on the city. It's massive red laser hummed and whined as it fired mid descent, blowing a building in its path so it could land. "Move!" Shepard shouted as the Reaper touched down, standing taller than the building they were in. It's single red 'eye' focused on them, as if it knew something important was going on in the room. The whining got louder as it charged its laser again and the red beam hummed toward them. "Go, go, go!" She shouted, turning to run, herself. Anderson was beside her as the beam hit the side of the building, shattering the windows and blowing the massive desk off its feet to spin end over end toward them rolling quickly. Shepard felt slightly like Indiana Jones as she dropped to her knees to take advantage of the inner curve of the desk as it careened over her head, barely making it under before it flew past and crashed into the far wall ahead of her. She had just regained her footing to glance back at the destruction when something else exploded. The wave of force blew her off her feet and threw her into a metal bench that sat towards where the desk had disintegrated with the force of its impact. She hit the bench, the top of her head connecting thankfully with the softer cushions on the back of the bench. Still, the impact jarred her and she rolled off the bench to the floor, dazed.

She swam at the edge of unconsciousness, blinking her eyes as the ringing in her ears from the explosion eased. Someone was calling her name. She sat up, touching her head to be sure she wasn't bleeding. The lump was barely registering as Anderson's voice reached her again. She glanced over and he was standing across the room looking frantically around for her. When he spotted her, he jogged over to help her to her feet. She shook off the throbbing in her head and accepted the pistol he handed her. His dress blues were ruined, covered in burns and blood and dirt. He called out on his comms and she set to work, checking all of the bodies strewn around the room for signs of life. The results were not promising. The council hadn't had time to escape from behind the desk and their burned corpses were releasing and acrid scent of cooked flesh. Shepard tried not to gag as Anderson spoke to Kaidan. She couldn't hear the other side of the conversation, but Anderson said he couldn't raise the Normandy and he ordered Kaidan to the landing zone, saying they would meet him there. Shepard found herself staring out the non existent window at the enormous Reaper parked in the middle of Vancouver. Fighters and transport shuttles zipped in all directions as the Reaper fired on all of them, trying to shoot them out of the sky. The whining groan of its laser was something she never wanted to get used to, but knew she would probably be hearing a whole lot more of before the war was over. Anderson clapped her shoulder and she turned her attention to him, gripping her pistol so hard her knuckles were turning white. "Come on, Shepard. Kaidan's headed to the Normandy. They'll pick us up if we can make it to the spaceport."

She followed him down onto a ledge that ran alongside the outside of the building. They picked their way around to the city, sticking to roofs and ledges, and dodging random laser fire from the nearby Reaper, Anderson in the lead as Shepard fought off her headache. They were soon met by a swarm of husks that they needed to fight off to make it inside a destroyed building and into a small amount of cover. The Reaper fired on them again and Shepard threw herself out of the way, landing with a grunt on her stomach as the building took even more damage, behind her. When the noise stopped, she stood and glanced to be sure Anderson was alright before climbing inside the new door that the Reaper's laser had ripped in the cement. They moved deeper into the building and Shepard pried open a broken door, holding it open for Anderson to slip through.

As he moved ahead, she heard a shifting noise behind her. Thinking it might be a civilian trapped or injured, she pulled out from the door and let it close behind her. Glancing around the small room, she saw no one, but there was a large air duct near the floor. She walked over to the duct and knelt to look inside. Her heart raced as she spotted, cowering toward the back of the duct near where it turned, the same small boy she'd observed playing in his backyard earlier before the Reapers had landed. "Hey," she spoke softly as the boy backed away from her. "It's okay."

"Everyone's dying!" the boy whimpered between sniffles.

She swallowed sympathetic tears and glanced behind her as the Reaper vibrated the floor and knocked dust from the destroyed ceiling as it trundled past, moving to attack another part of the city. "Come here," she said, still softly. The boy was frightened and she didn't want to scare him off. "I need to get you someplace safe." She reached her hand into the duct, hoping that he would reach back and let her help him. His blue eyes were wide and sparkling with tears. "Take my hand," she urged gently.

He continued to back away. "You can't help me," he said in a small voice.

Her hand lowered slightly as Anderson called her name from the other room. She glanced around at the urgency in his voice to be sure he was okay. "In here," he said, apparently having found a way through the building. When she glanced back at the duct to attempt to coax the boy out, he had vanished, apparently around the curve of the duct. Her heart sunk as she realized there was nothing she could do. She took a moment to hope he made it somewhere safe and followed after Anderson.

They picked their way through the debris of the ruined building, lifting rafters and shifting rubble to get through. "Agh," Anderson growled. "This is a goddamned mess. Every minute these machines are here, thousands of innocent people die. I won't be responsible."

"It's hard enough fighting a war," she agreed. "But it's worse knowing no matter how hard you try, you can't save them all."

"Exactly. They hit so fast... I thought we'd have more time."

"We knew they were coming," she reiterated.

"And they still just cut through our defenses," he grumbled. "We need to go to the Citadel. Talk to the Council."

"The Citadel?" she asked in horror. "The fight's here!"

"It'll be everywhere, soon enough," he reasoned. "You said it yourself. The Reapers will destroy everything if we don't stop them. The Council... has to help us," he said around gritted teeth as he lifted another bit of rubble to let her through.

"You sure about that?" she asked after she made it past, remembering the Council's unwillingness to help them before. She was certain they weren't going to break down and help now, even if they asked nicely.

They shuffled along a narrow ledge looking down into the bowels of the building. "No, but you were a Council SPECTRE. That has to count for something," he said hopefully. The whining groan sounded again outside and the building rumbled as something else in Vancouver was destroyed. She pitched forward, her balance thrown by the slight head injury she'd received and the stress of the situation. "Gotcha," Anderson grabbed her by the back of her shirt and helped her regain her footing as her stomach twisted.

"Thanks," she choked out around the lump that was slowly growing larger in her throat. "I owe you one," she tried to chuckle.

"More than one," he mumbled, his own smile not quite reaching his eyes.

When they were back on solid ground, she took a moment to reload her pistol and catch her breath then followed Anderson out a broken window onto more ledges around the outside of the building. As they made their way toward the spaceport, Anderson contacted Kaidan and as they were talking, a Reaper landed in the inlet of water just ahead of them. Shepard tried to ignore the lumbering machine, hoping it didn't turn around and spot them clear as day on the exposed ledge. Kaidan ordered the Normandy in evasive maneuvers as he shouted about a dreadnought being targeted. The signal cut out and Shepard panicked as she followed behind Anderson. She prayed for her friends as they dropped down onto a large open deck to head closer to where the Reaper was firing. A huge Alliance Dreadnought hovered in the sky a few miles away. It took a few hits from the Reaper before the kinetic barriers failed and the massive Dreadnought was destroyed. Shepard stopped and shielded her eyes against the bright flash of the explosion. Below in the water, she watched the shockwave from the explosion ripple toward them, splashing the water up in waves. She turned to run back the way she'd come but the wave hit her and Anderson. It knocked her back into a fallen bit of scaffolding and she lost her balance as the deck was knocked out from under her. The deck tipped and she slid and toppled down the brand new incline and grunted as she was deposited hard on what was left of a metal dock jutting into the water.

Bits of building and fallen cruisers and shuttles and God knew what else were strewn in the water, giving them plenty to pick their way across after she dragged herself up from the ground. They came across a pair of soldiers, covered behind a fallen piece of destruction. One was pinned below the rubble and the other was trying to keep him stable with applications of medi gel. The one not trapped shushed her and waved her down as she tried to ask if they were okay. "Get down they'll see you," he hissed.

Shepard didn't need to be told twice. She ducked down behind the short ledge in front of her and peered up toward where the soldier had thrown his head. Crawling all over the ledges above were a new type of Reaper troop. She watched as one of them knelt down to honest to goodness eat one of its fallen comrades. As it consumed the flesh noisily slurping and sucking down the pungent brownish grey flesh, she noticed it growing a large protective bit of plating over it's soft head. "You are what you eat," she mumbled as she took aim at the bit of plating first to test how hard it was. Her bullet pinged off of the plating, doing nothing but drawing attention to their presence. She quickly took stock of the six enemies in front of her and picked off the ones that had not yet had a snack and grown an extra protective layer. Her headshots left two of the cannibals left. She called on her biotics, reveling in the tingly feel of the power in her blood for the first time in a long time, she reached out and grabbed hold of the protective plating on the monsters' heads and used a pull to rip the new plates free. Anderson took a shot at the one to her right and she tossed a casual throw at the other, hitting it with it's own plate before carelessly tossing it into the water. Her skin was buzzing with the hum of her biotics and she threw up a barrier to make up for not having a shield or her omnitool.

Since the threats were neutralized, she and Anderson ducked down to address the two soldiers. "Do you have a radio?" Anderson asked.

"The gunship had one, but it's going to be crawling with those things," the pinned soldier informed him.

She and Anderson team lifted the large piece of debris that was holding him down and his partner pulled him out as he cried out in pain over his broken legs. She felt sympathy for the man, but there was little they could do. She didn't even have medigel. Once he was free, they dropped the debris and it sunk below the water, creating a convenient bridge for them to cross over to the gunship. Along the way, Shepard was distracted for a short period of time by a flyover by a gigantic reaperized creature that she could only describe as a dragon. It chased after a fleeing shuttle with a howl as it shot balls of plasma out its mouth. "What the fuck?" she said almost to herself as it disappeared into the distance. It had to have been a Harvester from Tuchanka that they'd gotten their hands on.

"Shepard! Over here! I found the radio!" Anderson crouched by the downed gunship while she picked up an assault rifle that had been discarded on the ground nearby. It didn't seem to be damaged and it had a full clip. "Normandy, this is Anderson. Do you read?"

Kaidan's voice called out over the static. "Admiral! What's your location?"

"By a downed gunship in the harbor. I'm activating it's distress beacon," Anderson answered, fiddling with the controls. "Send support. We've got wounded down here." There was a degraded response that was overrun with interference. "Major?" More whining and electronic feedback and the interface shut down. "Dammit! I lost the signal."

"Let's hope that beacon does its job," she sighed keeping her eyes out for any Reaper forces.

"And fast. We've got company," Anderson pointed at the flashes of red fire falling from the sky. When they hit the ground and the smoke cleared, more cannibals unfolded from the flames.

Shepard and Anderson took cover, killing the seemingly endless waves of the greedy things. Each time one fell, she tried her best to keep another that tried to feed off it as far away as possible so they wouldn't grow any of those protective plates. She was quickly running out of ammo and she dropped the assault rifle and took the pistol back out to continue to fire. Just before she was completely out of bullets and her biotic barrier had fallen, she thought she heard Joker's voice over the comm in her ear that Anderson had given her to patch her in to the chatter. "Cavalry has arrived!" The Normandy zipped over their heads, firing on the remaining cannibals and taking them all out. Then it spun around and lowered to hover just above the edge of a damaged ramp at the end of the harbor.

She watched the cargo door open and saw a few soldiers standing on the door ready to cover them. She'd never seen a more welcome sight. "Let's go!" She shouted, vaulting over a half wall before running full tilt out of the fray and up the ramp. She jumped on the Normandy, her heart soaring as she felt at home for the first time in months.

Kaidan grinned at her as he steadied her when she stumbled from her still dizzy head. "Welcome aboard, Shepard."

"Thanks," she grinned back. Then she turned to Anderson who'd stopped at the top of the ramp before getting on the Normandy.

"Shepard," he called, a serious expression painted over his face.

"Come on!" She urged, wondering why he hadn't yet joined them.

A rescue shuttle passed over head and he turned to watch it land behind him where they'd left the two soldiers. "I'm not going." She frowned, ready to drag him away if she had to. "You saw those men back there. There's a million more like them and they need a leader."

"Like hell! We're in this fight together, Anderson!" She took a step back toward the edge of the cargo bay door.

He held up a hand to keep her on the ship. "It's a fight we can't win. Not without help. We need every species and all of their ships to even have a chance at defeating the Reapers. Talk to the council. Convince them to help us."

She stared at him in his ruined dress blues, determination in the set of his shoulders and the gleam in his eyes. "What if they won't listen?" she asked a little more softly over the din of the distant battles.

"Then _make_ them listen! Now go! That's an order." He smirked as she cocked a hip.

"I don't take orders from you anymore, remember?"

He reached in his pocket and pulled out a small silver object that glinted in the small amount of sun that peeked through the dreary atmosphere. He bounced the clanking metal in his palm, the chain slipping to dangle between his fingers. "Consider yourself reinstated... Commander!" He tossed the tags at her and she caught them, opening her fist to read her name and number on one side and the N7 logo on the other. "You know what you have to do."

She slipped the tags onto her neck and they hung like a comfortable weight clanking softly when she shifted. "I'll be back for you, and I'll bring every fleet I can!" she promised. "Good luck."

"You too, Shepard," he nodded his head and turned to jog back toward the shuttle with a rushed salute.

She turned to join Kaidan further into the ship and the Normandy began to lift from it's hover. He shot her a look mixed with concern and his usual puppy eyes as she gave him a halfhearted smile before turning to watch Anderson go. More shuttles began to zoom in, landing nearby to evacuate anyone they could cram in. She watched as people scurried about in the distance, young helping the elderly, mothers fleeing with children in their arms, injured limping along with the help of strangers. As she stared and the Normandy lifted, safely concealed by its stealth drive, she caught a glimpse of the little boy again. He was cowering by one of the escape shuttles, covering his ears at the dreadful clamor as a Reaper landed nearby. While the Reaper destroyed things all around it, the boy climbed alone into the shuttle, fear the only thing present on his tiny face and the door slid closed behind him. As the shuttles took off trying to outrun the Reaper, the skyscraper sized machine turned its attention on them and fired. The giant laser took out one shuttle and then the other. The shuttles exploded, one after the other and she felt a pang of sorrow as the innocent people all packed inside were killed. Now that little blue eyed boy would never grow up and fly a real space fighter. Rage at the Reapers boiled inside her. She backed into the cargo bay and the door lifted to seal her in and the Normandy jumped into orbit.

Her mood was foul as she stomped up the cargo bay past the two identical shuttles parked to either side. She saw Kaidan at the weapons bench putting away the assault rifle he'd had in his hands. Before she could even approach him, James stepped out from a cubby hole surrounded by crates on all sides filled with supplies and gear. "What the hell's going on?" He asked her as she whisked by him, sidestepping his sudden invasion of her personal space. "Where's Anderson? Where are we going?" She ignored him, continuing toward the requisitions locker. If she was going to be in command again, she was going to need more than a pistol. "Hey!" he shouted after her.

She sighed and half turned to address him, still moving. "We're leaving."

"Leaving?" he asked with shock in his voice.

"What's going on?" Kaidan asked much more softly, sensing her mood.

"Anderson wants us to go to the Citadel, get help for the fight," she clarified, fiddling with the prompts to order herself an omnitool.

"Bullshit! He wouldn't order us to leave," James protested.

She stopped what she was doing and pounded her frustration on the surface of the console. "We don't have a choice! Without help, this war's already over."

"Forget it!" He shouted at her. "Drop me off someplace....."

She prodded her finger in his overgrown chest and raised her own voice. "Enough! Don't you think I'd rather stay and fight?!" She pulled her finger away and she caught him glancing down at her chest where her tags gleamed her reinstatement plain as day. "We are going to the Citadel... You want out, you can catch a ride back from there."

He waved a dismissive hand, turning his back on her as she went back to what she was doing. Apparently he wasn't willing to question her now that he realized she was in charge again, but he still didn't like it. She had no time or patience to hold his hand. He was young. He would fall in line or he could get off her ship. "Commander!" the comms chattered.

"Joker? That you?" she paused to listen.

"Alive and kicking... Got an emergency transmission from Admiral Hackett for you," he said. His usual smirk was obvious in his voice.

It was about time they heard from the brass. James stopped in his tracks, interested to hear the transmission and Kaidan hovered behind her. "Patch it through," she said, pulling up the vid as it flashed.

The connection was terrible. Hackett seemed distracted by whatever was going on around him on his end, but he spoke plainly to her. She caught the gist of his message. She told him her orders from Anderson and he said they needed to go to an Alliance outpost on Mars before they lost control of the system. There was something about the Prothean archives and she thought she heard him say Dr. T'soni. Was Liara on Mars? Whatever he wanted on Mars, it was apparently the 'only way to stop the Reapers'.

"Joker," she called immediately after Hackett disconnected. "Set a course for the Mars Archives."

"Mars? Roger that." he said and she activated the codes to release one of the shuttles from its dock.

"This is loco," James said, his tone disbelieving.

"Why Mars?" Kaidan asked. "What does he think we'll find there?"

"I dunno, yet..." she said, her new omnitool dropping from the fabricator. She slipped the little piece of comfort onto her wrist and then began putting together a new set of armor. "but if it helps us win this war.... Grab your gear."

 


	26. Mistrust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Shepard investigates the Mars Archives, Kaidan makes it clear that he still harbors mistrust.

There was a massive dust storm brewing and threatening to cut off communications with the Normandy. James landed the shuttle ground-side on the rusty red planet. Shepard was settling into her new armor and reveling in the layers of protection from that and her shields. The wind whipped past her helmet, dulling out Kaidan and James as they commented on the size of the giant storm cloud not very far to their right. She led them down a short ladder and when she landed back on her feet, she was greeted by a dead Alliance soldier. Kaidan knelt to scan the body and she pulled out her pistol, suddenly feeling exposed on the high ground. So far there had been no signs of Reapers, but any number of enemies could have killed the soldier. They had not been able to contact the base yet, but that could have been due to the state of communications lately. Now she wasn't so sure.

A little further down the track ridden road, she heard the distinct sound of gunfire being carried to her on the wind. She scurried up and ducked down behind a short roadblock fence. "Holy shit! They're executing them!" James said as he took cover behind a large outcropping of rock.

The armor and colors of the soldiers was all too familiar and she tapped out her incinerate program on her omnitool, charging it to get the drop on the Cerberus forces. About five or six in total scurried around trying to find cover as two of their comrades burned inside their armor. Kaidan's biotics had matured in the few years they'd been apart. She watched him pull a massive reave on three enemies at once, incapacitating them and making them easy targets for her pistol while he absorbed the life force, giving his biotics an instant recharge. She was going to have to see if he could teach her how to do that. Once the enemies were down, she ran ahead to see if there were any of the Alliance security still alive.

"Those guys were Cerberus, weren't they?" James asked jogging up behind her.

"Sure looked like it," she agreed, turning over one of the executed soldiers and closing his eyes.

"Cerberus," Kaidan's voice came out in a growl. "What are they doing here on Mars?"

"Good question," she grumbled, stacking the new threat on top of the Reaper invasion in her mind and pushing forward.

"You don't know?" he asked.

She sighed. "I'm not with them anymore, Kaidan, if that's what you're asking," she said, really not in the mood to be dredging up this old argument.

"I wasn't, but you've got to admit it's a bit, uh, convenient," he said snidely, the accusation clear in his tone.

She brushed him off heading for the front door of the facility where a collection of ground vehicles sat parked outside. "Doesn't look like they came here in force," James pointed out.

"Yeah, just a few vehicles," she agreed.

"Must have had help from the inside," Kaidan lumped more suspicion into his voice.

If he was going to be like this the whole war, she was going to need some serious medication. Oddly enough, she missed Kelly. The Yeoman would have known exactly what to say. "You could be right," she said with sarcasm.

"No way they could take this facility with anything less than a full batallion," he shot back.

There was silence full of tension for a few moments while she investigated the area before heading toward the doors. "Commander, I thought you told Cerberus to screw off after you wiped out that Collector base they were after." James said, breaking the silence and trying to play mediator. At least he seemed to be on her side so far.

"That's exactly what I did," she agreed, still staring down Kaidan.

"Well, one thing's for sure. They're no friend of the Alliance," the Lieutenant finished.

"Agreed." She turned and stalked off to the entry.

As she hacked the elevator controls, letting the door close behind her party, Kaidan approached her with determination in his stride. "Shepard, I need a straight answer."

"Kaidan," she sighed, dropping her arms in frustration, wishing she could pinch the bridge of her nose. He was making her headache worse.

"Don't 'Kaidan' me... This is business," he pointed his finger at her. "Do you know anything about why Cerberus is here?"

"What makes you think I know what they're up to?" she asked, turning to him and tossing her arms out in a questioning gesture.

"You worked for them for God's sake. How am I not supposed to think that?" He persisted, walking small rings back and forth before her. He was frustrating her so badly, she nearly reached out her foot to trip him in spite. Finally he stopped and leaned on the elevator guard rail, his back to her.

She moved to lean an elbow on the rail and put herself in his line of sight. "We joined forces to take down the Collectors _that's_ it." She spat angrily.

"There's more to it. They rebuilt you from the ground up. They gave you a ship, resources." His voice was softening.

"Let me be clear," she spoke quickly, hoping she would get through to him and end this debate before they ran into more enemies. "I've had no contact with Cerberus since I destroyed the Collector base and I have no idea why they're here now or what they want."

James stepped in to defend her. "Commander Shepard's been under constant surveillance since coming back to Earth. No way they've communicated since."

She gestured to James as Kaidan turned his face to her, raising her eyebrows, _see?_

"Sorry Shepard, It's just that..." Kaidan sighed as the pressure release hissed, telling her it was safe to remove her helmet.

After she turned away and did so, she glanced over her shoulder and said, "You of all people should know what I'm about, Kaidan." The elevator ground to a stop and the rail dropped down to allow them to step off into a warehouse like entry full of crates and ground vehicles specced to Mar's atmosphere. His face was fully exposed to her now and he looked hurt, hanging his head like she'd scolded him. They stepped off the elevator platform side by side and he set his brown puppy eyes on her again. "Please trust me," she almost begged. Having him on her team might be awkward for a while, but he was an asset none the less.

"I do. I'm sorry," he repeated. "I didn't mean..."

Before they could continue, a loud clanging echoed through the room. She pushed him to the side and followed, ducking behind one of the Makos parked in the garage. Her pistol was in her hand again without a second thought, the conversation melting away as she listened. The racket was deafening. Someone was crawling through the ventilation shaft above their heads and apparently shooting. Bullets pinged noisily around inside the metal duct. She tracked the movement to a probable exit point where the shaft ended in a grate. The grate clanged as someone kicked at it, loosening it and finally knocking it out of place. When Liara jumped out of the shaft, her hands tensed around her gun, but the Asari had a look of determination on her face as she dropped to the floor and spun, throwing a singularity at the opening where she'd come out. Two heavily armored Cerberus troops fell comically into her biotic field, flailing and reaching for purchase. She calmly pulled a pistol from her belt and tagged them each once, knocking them to the ground. After they fell she put them both out of their misery with two headshots each, silencing the ragged breathing coming from their voice altering helmet mics.

Shepard grinned and holstered her pistol, moving out from behind the truck and heading toward Liara. James flanked her, his assault rifle primed and aimed for Liara. "Easy Lieutenant. She's with us," Shepard pushed his muzzle down to point at the floor as Liara looked up and noticed them approaching.

The Asari beamed at her as they approached. "Shepard. Thank the Goddess you're alive!"

"Liara," she smiled in greeting, extremely glad to see her friend unharmed.

"I was worried when the reports came in. They hit Earth hard?" Liara asked in her same soft sensual voice, laced with relief.

Kaidan appeared on Shepard's left, "Yeah, it was hard to leave like that."

"Kaidan, I'm sorry," Liara said gently, narrowing her eyes and glancing quickly between the two of them. "But... why'd you come here?" she asked turning away and moving to a nearby window that looked over the rest of the facility.

"Hackett ordered us to come," Shepard answered. "Said you'd know what was going on."

"I do," she said with a smirk.

"Hallelujah. Some answers, finally," James said as they followed Liara to the window.

"Maybe," Liara said turning to face them. "I've discovered plans for a Prothean device. One that could wipe out the Reapers."

"Here? On Mars?" Shepard asked hopefully. They could end the war before it really even started.

"In the Prothean Archives, yes." Liara said, still smiling.

"We've known about the archives for decades. Why now?" She asked, glancing out the window toward where Liara had gestured.

Liara chuckled softly. "Process of elimination, mixed with a little desperation. When you destroyed the Alpha Relay, you bought us some time, but then you were under investigation. I knew I had to do something. Hackett knew it, too. He contacted me, asking if I would use my resources as the Shadow Broker to find a way to stop the Reapers. My search led me here. Hackett got me access to the archives and kept me updated on your status. I meant to come see you, but..."

Shepard scoffed, crossing her arms. "I was under house arrest. There wasn't much I could do to help you, anyway."

"I suppose you're right," she sighed. "In any case, my work paid off. The archives are full of data. An overwhelming amount. I think I found what we need."

"I guess I'll believe it when I see it," she stepped closer to Liara and placed a hand on her friend's shoulder. "Where do we find this weapon?"

"It's not a weapon... Not yet. It's plans for a device. A blueprint." Liara said wringing her hands together.

Shepard shrugged. "It's more than we had a minute ago. How do we get it?"

"The archives are just across that tramway," Liara pointed out the window. "Assuming Cerberus hasn't locked it down."

"What are they after?" Shepard asked, hoping Liara could shed some light on the situation.

"Yeah, they seem hell bent on catching you," James pointed out.

"They want what I'm here for... What we're all here for," Liara sighed.

"But why?" Shepard asked, wondering what Cerberus wanted with Prothean technology.

"The Protheans came close to defeating the Reapers. They had plans to destroy them, but ran out of time."

"And anything powerful enough to destroy the Reapers..." Kaidan said.

"Just might be something Cerberus would be interested in," Shepard finished.

"So it's a race to the archives," James said.

Just as he finished his sentence, an explosion somewhere rocked the facility and above them on the next level, sparks began flying from a doorway as someone on the other side attempted to laser their way in. "We've got company," Shepard pointed out, drawing her pistol.

"Bring it on," James said defiantly, readying his assault rifle.

"Not this time, James," she said, hatching a plan.

"What?" he asked, insulted that she was benching him.

"Get back to the shuttle. If Cerberus beats us to the archives, I need you covering the exits," she explained jogging to the elevator and starting the lowering process.

"But..." he started to argue as another explosion jostled them.

"Now, Lieutenant," she ordered.

He grudgingly made his way onto the platform and secured his helmet as they took cover. "There's the Asari bitch!" one of the troopers shouted as they busted through the door above.

"Aw, Liara, You made some new friends," Shepard smirked as she took a head count of the enemies. Adjusting her tactics for the four troops on the balcony, she called forth her biotics again. When Kaidan glanced at her and noticed her glowing aura, he frowned and she shot him a wink before charging into the group of Cerberus flunkies. They all were knocked back, one with a satisfying crunch as his neck snapped with the force of her charge. She blasted the nearest one with her shotgun and then spun to take on the last two. Liara had provided a singularity, making them easy targets, Kaidan hadn't even taken a shot before they were both dead. "What's the hold up, slow pokes? Get your asses up here. We've got a tram to catch." Shepard grinned, hefting her shotgun.

Liara and Kaidan took the long way up over stacks of crates after realizing the lift was broken. "Since when are you a biotic?" Kaidan asked suspiciously.

She nudged him with her elbow, trying to lighten his somber mood. He'd been a right prick since they'd landed and she was a bit fed up. "I'm not me anymore, remember?"

"Shepard," Liara scolded softly.

Shepard sighed as Kaidan glared at her. "Come on. Let's get to those archives."

"Did you know about this?" Kaidan asked Liara softly as Shepard stalked off through another door.

Liara hummed her agreement and a disgusted noise followed Shepard as the two fell in behind her. She decided that ignoring Kaidan was the way to keep sane for the moment. They snuck through the facility as best they could, trying to get to the pedway. At the security station, Kaidan noticed a woman on the cam footage dressed in something that Shepard would have associated with a dancer on Omega more than the 'doctor' Liara said she was. Thinking of her and James' conversation about help from the inside, Shepard wasn't ruling out Eva Core until she met the woman or had more solid proof that she wasn't the infiltrator.

With the pedway locked out, they were forced to make their way over the roof to the adjoining building. While they trekked across the roof construction, they lost contact with James as the storm bore down on them. What they found inside was an opened airlock and countless dead scientists and facility workers. After taking out the Cerberus troops at the facility's controls, Liara re-pressurized the room, closing the airlock. Shepard removed her helmet and took a deep breath of the real air and narrowed her eyes at the computer screen in front of her. "Look there's a recording of what happened here." Liara brought up the footage and Shepard's suspicions were confirmed. Dr. Eva Core was their sleeper agent. "I guess we know how Cerberus got in," she mused as Liara's expression turned to shock as she watched Eva shoot and kill the security guards and then hack the computers to decompress the room.

"I should have realized it when I met her. I was just so focused on finding a way to stop the Reapers..." Liara turned away from the disturbing recording.

Shepard followed her, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Stopping the Reapers is the only thing we should be focused on," she heard her own words, but in the back of her mind, she was not only focused on that. She was afraid for Garrus. If Earth had been attacked, the other species' homeworlds wouldn't be far behind. Last she knew, Garrus was home on Palaven visiting his ill mother and trying to convince someone that the Reapers really existed. She hoped he was okay. "It's not your fault."

"But what if we're wrong? What if there's no way to stop them?" Liara asked, shrugging Shepard's comforting hand away and turning to face her. "What if these are our last days and we spend them scurrying around trying to solve a problem we can't fix?"

Shepard pursed her lips. "Come on, Liara." As much as she wanted to, she couldn't sit idly or find some remote deserted planet and wait out the apocalypse with Garrus. She had to fight for the galaxy. Sometimes she knew how the Krogan felt when they would say 'it is in my blood'.

"I know. I shouldn't think that way," Liara agreed with a soft smile. "I don't know how you do it. You've always stayed focused, even in the worst situations."

Again, her thoughts went to Garrus. As she thought about the sparkle in his blue eyes as his mandibles flared in a smile, she couldn't help her own small smile. "When there's so much at stake, I just think about what I'd lose if I fail."

Liara glanced behind her at Kaidan who frowned. "That's a terrible burden," the Asari mused, crossing her arms and raising her eyebrows, trying to hint at something.

Shepard shot her own glance at Kaidan and then patted Liara. "We'll stop them, Liara. Together."

"Thanks. I want to believe you," her friend said with a bitter smile and unlocked the security to the labs. "Okay, door's open. We can get to the labs and tram station through there."

"Good let's move," Shepard took out her pistol and dropped the conversation, moving forward. They soon came upon the entrance to the labs and Cerberus had set up a pretty nasty automated turret. "Stay in cover and don't let it get a bead on you!" Shepard shouted, charging down the hallway from cover to cover after Kaidan who had decided to move up first. They were going to have to have a conversation about him following orders when they got back to the Normandy.

After a nerve-wracking few minutes, Shepard caught her breath on the opposite side of the room where the turret couldn't target them. Some more Cerberus troops later, they were standing in front of another security station that would bring a tram to them so they could cross to the archives. A camera showed them Eva Core arguing with another trooper about locking out trams before they could get across. "Looks like they've made it to the archives," Liara said, her soft voice laced with frustration.

"And I doubt they'll just send us a tram," Kaidan grumbled, fussing over his assault rifle's sightlines.

"Can you override it?" Shepard asked Liara who was the only one out of them who should have the necessary clearance to get into the archives.

Liara fiddled with the controls and then shook her head. "The archives are on a separate network. We're completely locked out."

"Not if we can find a short range communicator. Helmet to helmet," Kaidan suggested.

"And?" Shepard asked sarcastically.

"And we convince them that we're on their side, tell them the Alliance forces have been taken care of." He snapped back.

Shepard bit her lip, sorry she'd discounted him before even hearing his idea. "Good idea. See what you can find." He nodded and stalked off. She turned and glanced at Liara who was sitting now in front of the security controls trying to find some way around the lockdown. The Asari glanced at her, a small smirk on her purple lips. "What?" Shepard asked a bit more forcefully than she'd meant.

"The Major has become very capable," Liara said, the smirk not leaving her face.

"That he has," Shepard agreed softly, glancing after Kaidan. They had never officially settled their personal issues and she tried to see things from his perspective. Goodness knew what he had heard about her while she'd been locked up. They had more than his sudden insubordination to discuss. She sighed and followed after him, leaving Liara to her fiddling. She found him kneeling on one knee in front of a dead Cerberus troop. "What've you got?" she asked, training her voice to be a bit more sympathetic.

"He's got a transmitter in his helmet," Kaidan muttered as he attempted to pry the helmet open. "If I could..." The helmet hissed as it popped open and Kaidan reeled back. "My God... He looks like a husk!"

"Yeah, not quite..." she whispered, curiosity forcing her to drop down where he had abandoned. She reached into the helmet where the half man, half husk had his helmet mic embedded and plucked it out while marveling at the veins of blue electronics feathering across his cheeks and forehead. "But they've definitely done something to him."

"And by they, you mean Cerberus?" he spat, his disgust clear in the raspiness in his voice. "They did this to their own guy?" He paused as she stood with the transmitter in her palm. "Is this what they did to you?"

"How can you compare me to him?!" she nearly shouted, as she felt the color drain from her face as she remembered back to after she had first woken up. The orange cybernetics scars that had skittered across her face were finally completely gone. This _thing_ in front of them was an abomination.

"Shepard, I don't know what you are... or who... not since Cerberus rebuilt you," he sighed, seeing the look of horror on her face. "For all I know you could be their puppet, controlled by the Illusive Man himself."

"Kaidan..." she began, hoping to pull some words out of her butt to convince him that she was still her. Her feelings for him may have changed, but he was still a fantastic soldier that she could use on her team.

He reached up and rubbed his forehead, "Don't try to explain it. I don't think I'd understand anyway." His arm dropped and he approached her, shoving her heartbeat into turbo mode as he said, "I just wanna know, is the person I followed to hell and back... the person I loved... are you still in there... somewhere?"

Her sigh came out ragged as she fought the roller coaster he had dragged her onto. "You, me, Cerberus... That's in the past Kaidan. Right now, we have a war to fight." This was not a discussion to have while Cerberus was winning the race to the archives.

And there were the puppy eyes she was expecting. It hurt her heart to see that expression again. He was angry with her because he was hurting and it was her fault. "Yeah sure. You're right, I guess." He sighed.

"Come on. Let's see what Cerberus is up to. Maybe we'll both get some answers," She lifted the transmitter to her mouth and spoke. "Hello, this is Delta Team. Anybody there?"

"Where the hell have you been?" A gravely altered voice replied. "Nevermind, what's your status?"

She nodded to Kaidan. "We're at the tram station, waiting for extraction. All hostiles terminated."

"Roger that. Echo Team will ride over and secure the station," the voice replied again before the comm shut off.

"Think they bought it?" Kaidan asked.

"If they didn't, they'll figure it out soon enough," she said with a smirk, rolling her shoulders. She was starting to feel the stress of the day catching up with her. Her body was aching nearly as badly as it had when she'd first woken up in the Cerberus lab a year ago.

"We should get into position and flank them when they get off the train," Kaidan suggested, pointing out the perfect spot for them to take cover in.

"Good thinking, Major," she said with a pat to his shoulder as Liara joined them.

Echo Team consisted of about 8 Cerberus troops crammed into the tram and they were easily dispatched in spite of the two Guardian troops carrying full body riot shields. Liara threw a singularity at them, yanking them into the air and forcing the heavy shields from their grip. Shepard and Kaidan made short work of them and she kicked one body from the tram before securing her helmet on and starting the tram to cross over to the archives.

After the airlock opened and the tram started across. Shepard glanced to her right and saw the storm nearly right on top of them. "Storm's getting bad. We better wrap this up quickly."

"The archives are right on the other side," Liara assured her.

"That and a squad of angry Cerberus troops," Kaidan agreed, a little more of the old Kaidan snark that she remembered surfacing.

A few feet down the track the tram triggered a proximity mine that Cerberus must have left on their way over. The track blew and jostled the tram, knocking Shepard off her feet and dropping her shields. The tram luckily stayed on the track, but there was no way it would take them the rest of the way. As Shepard tried to think of a way to get across, a second tram exited the airlock ahead and moved toward them. There was another pack of Cerberus troops on board and Shepard fixed her shields as Kaidan and Liara threw biotics at the approaching squad.

"Damn," Kaidan said as they jumped to the second tram full of dead Cerberus troops. "They really didn't want us getting in here."

"Yes," Liara agreed, panting through her exertions. "It confirms my assertions about the value of the data stored here."

The tram coasted back to where it had come from at Shepard's coaxing and the airlock opened and closed behind them. Of course there were more Cerberus troops awaiting them in dug in positions as they exited the tram. Shepard was starting to get annoyed at the seemingly endless supply. How many people had allowed the Illusive man to experiment on them? It was horrible. About twenty more troops later they crossed to the entry into the archives. They warily entered the large room and Shepard after making sure nothing was popping out immediately to take their heads off, ordered Kaidan to do a sweep of the perimeter while she and Liara approached what looked like a large Prothean beacon like the ones she'd encountered during the hunt for Saren. It had several more towers on it, giving the illusion of a small model of a city skyline. Shepard marveled at the beauty of the architecture as the Alliance equipment around the room took constant readings of the activity of the glowing beacon. They had built a large spherical glass dome around it for protection. Even so, Shepard was tempted to reach out and touch it. "Shepard," she heard her name called and frowned, initially thinking that somehow the beacon was speaking to her. When she snapped out of the fog clouding her mind, she spun and lifted her pistol.

Liara already had her gun pointed. "Illusive Man..." The asshole in question stood smugly nearby, a holographic image displaying him as it had on the Normandy. "Now we know why Cerberus is here."

Shepard dropped her weapon, realizing the pointlessness of aiming at the image. "You don't know the half of it," the Illusive Man said calmly. "The Protheans left us these archives, a wealth of information, and its been squandered."

"What do you want?" Shepard demanded, her irritation rising as the beauty of the place was tainted with his presence.

"What I've always wanted," he said, glancing behind her at the Archives. "The data in these archives holds the key to solving the Reaper threat."

"I've seen your solution," she spat, shuddering at the thought of the people under the masks. "Your people are turned into monsters."

"Hardly," he scoffed. "They're being improved."

She fought the urge to chuckle hysterically, instead crossing her arms and settling into her hips. "Improved?"

"That's what separates us, Shepard. Where you see a means to destroy, I see a way to control... to dominate and control the Reapers' power. Imagine how strong humanity would be if we controlled them."

"Earth is under siege and you're hatching a scheme to control the Reapers?" The man was delusional.

"You seem surprised. My goal has been, and always will be, to use whatever means I have at my disposal to protect humanity." How was making people into cybernetic drones for hire 'protecting' humanity?

"The Reapers are _not_ a means to an end," she reasoned.

"Not to you," he pointed his fingers with a cigarette planted between them at her and she sneered. "This isn't your fight any longer, Shepard. You can't defeat the Reapers, even with the Prothean data."

"Work with me. Give me control of your resources, and I'll stop them," she insisted. She hated Cerberus, but if they were funding the war effort, they might stand a chance. It also might give her an in to find and contain the outbreak of half husks.

"You'd do better than most," he sighed. "But the odds aren't in your favor... More importantly, I don't want the Reapers destroyed. We can dominate them, use their power, harness their very essence to bring humanity to the apex of evolution."

"You have gone too far," she snapped, wishing she could get a hold of him and wring his neck. "The Reapers will kill us all if we don't stop fighting each other!" She shouldn't have to fight through the archives killing humans, no matter how altered they were, while the Reapers were wreaking havoc throughout the galaxy. Her thoughts returned to Garrus. He had to be okay.

"I don't expect you to understand, Shepard. And I'm certainly not looking for your approval. I needed your help once, just as you needed mine. But like the rest of the relics in this place, your time is over."

"Enough talk! Liara..." Shepard spun, disregarding the threat and deciding to ignore the hologram.

"Don't interfere with my plans, Shepard. I won't warn you again."

She hated threats. "Duly noted," she grumbled.

"Shepard!" Liara called, drawing her attention back again.

"What?" she asked, a little more short than she meant.

"That data it's not here! It's being erased!"

The hologram had disappeared. "Damn it! How's he doing it?" she asked. She refused to let him get away with her data.

"It's local. Someone's uploading the information," Liara said scrambling to recover what she could from her console.

Just then, Kaidan's voice resounded across the room. "Hey! Step away from the console!" A pause as Shepard scanned the room trying to pinpoint his location. "Now!" Her eyes shot to him and she was too slow to even see the ninja moves coming. Two meaty thunks and Kaidan was on the ground gasping to catch his breath. Shepard moved to help, and she heard from inside the alcove the sickening sound of a console being destroyed by a powerful omni tool powered electrical punch. The green glow of the archives died as the connection was severed. Shepard saw a woman dart from the alcove and run for the exit. Kaidan gasped. "She's got the data!"

Shepard gave chase, Eva Core dodging and maneuvering with almost inhuman skill. She left Kaidan to Liara and ran as fast as she could after the only link left to the Prothean data. Shepard couldn't even stop to wonder when the woman opened the airlock and darted outside into the Mars atmosphere completely unprotected. Shepard just ran, dodging omnitool attacks that the woman was throwing over her shoulder. Shepard shouted over her comms as the woman made for the roof and a Cerberus shuttle flew over head. She was going to get away. She needed someone to hear her. "James! Normandy! Anybody!" The storm was blowing around her and she was glad for her helmet keeping the dust from her eyes as she climbed the ladder to the roof, right on the woman's heels.

Eva darted across the roof as the Cerberus shuttle hovered down to allow her to jump on. After one last plea from Shepard, she heard James' voice crackle over her comm. "I got this one!" She sighed briefly before the Cerberus shuttle attempted to take off only to be rammed hard by the Alliance blue Kodiak that they had arrived in. Kaidan and Liara had kept closer on their heels than she'd thought and she waved them back as the destroyed Cerberus shuttle came careening toward them. She dove out of the way and it smashed into the roof a little closer than she'd have liked. She got to her feet and signaled to Kaidan to be sure he was okay. He waved her off and stood, making his way to check on Liara. Shepard waved James down to the roof as the Kodiak limped through the air over head. The Lieutenant sloppily landed the shuttle and jumped out, putting the Kodiak between her and the others. "Normandy's en route," he said brushing dust off his armor. "They'll be here soon."

"We need the data," Liara said over the comm, a rustling noise indicating that Kaidan had helped her to her feet and was supporting her while she caught her breath.

A banging noise drew Shepard's attention. She backed up to glance between the thrusters on the back of the Kodiak and see what made the bang that was closely followed by ripping metal and another loud crash. She saw the hatch of the broken Cerberus shuttle fly past Kaidan and Liara and land across the roof. In the threshold stood a burnt shell of a mech that was still roughly in the shape of Eva Core. That explained her speed, agility and ability to breathe Mars' air. She was not human. She was some high tech mech. Kaidan grabbed the pistol from Liara's holster and shoved the stunned Asari away to take aim at the thing. He shot maybe five times before it was on top of him, slapping the gun away and grabbing him up by his helmet. It was so fast, Shepard barely had time to think. Her breath caught and she pulled her own gun, running around the Kodiak as the mech dangled him in mid air with one hand. "Kaidan!" She took aim, but there was no way she could hit the mech without hitting Kaidan as well. "Let him go!"

The mech regarded her through a blue visor that had formed over it's eyes, then proceeded to touch a finger to it's 'ear'. "Orders?" it said in a sing song synthetic voice.

Whatever the Illusive Man said, the thing, faster than humanly possible spun and slammed Kaidan against the side of the ruined shuttle. "No!" Shepard shouted between the first and second slam. After the third, the mech dropped Kaidan to the ground and he crumbled. Then it spun and made a beeline for her. The world narrowed around her as she tore her gaze from Kaidan's inert form and Shepard unloaded into the mech. Round after round pelted the thick metal surface of it's silver skin. Finally she found the sweet spot and the mech went down with a whine a mere foot in front of her. She took a few ragged breaths, her pistol still aimed before she decided the mech was no longer a threat then ran for Kaidan. "Grab that _thing,_ " she spat to James. "Bring it with us!"

She knelt beside Kaidan as Joker's voice came hissing over the interference from the storm. "Shepard, we've got Reaper signatures in orbit."

She lifted Kaidan as gently as she could in a fireman's carry as the Normandy glided in to hover just above the roof between the two broken shuttles. She carried him into the cargo bay and directly for the elevator as James and Liara followed. They all crammed in the elevator and made for the crew deck and the med bay. The Normandy had escaped Earth with a skeleton crew and she knew that meant the only doctor on board was likely to be Liara. The Asari in question gently removed Kaidan's helmet as they rode the elevator, and activated her omnitool to do a preliminary scan. Shepard glanced away from the schematic of Kaidan's scans. There were a lot of red spots near his head.

When they reached the med bay, James unceremoniously dumped the mech onto one of the slabs and it landed with a heavy clunk. Shepard with Liara's help laid Kaidan down on the opposite bed. She stared down at his face. She'd once found it so handsome and now it was bruised and bloodied, his light brown eyes hidden behind his lids. She'd yet to remove her hands from his arm. Liara leaned in and tried to meet her gaze. "Kaidan needs medical attention." Shepard barely heard her. After a pause, she leaned down again and her blue eyes slipped between Kaidan's body and Shepard's gaze, drawing Shepard's full attention. "We need to leave the Sol system," Liara insisted.

"I know," Shepard said, her throat tight. She had once loved this man. Losing him was not an option.

"The Citadel is our best chance. We can find help there," Liara said, recognizing the need to hold Shepard's hand through this particular crisis.

"Joker, get us to the Citadel," Shepard barked.

"Roger that," Joker agreed, for once, his usual sarcastic bite not present in his voice.

Shepard returned her gaze to Kaidan and stroked her fingers through his hair. "Hold on, Kaidan," she whispered softly, swallowing the threat of tears. After a few breaths, when she could trust her voice again, she said. "See what you and EDI can learn from that thing."

Liara moved to the table with the mech sprawled on it and began to scan it. Just then, EDI's sultry voice poured from the speakers. "Commander, I'm receiving a signal over the secondary QEC. I believe it's Admiral Hackett."

"Patch me through," Shepard pulled herself together, realizing the urgency of their situation.

"I'll forward it to the comm room," EDI agreed and Shepard jogged to the elevator to get to the CIC deck.

The communication was a short debrief and Shepard found herself leaning in exhaustion on the console after the Admiral dropped connection, as she listened to Liara talk about the data they were recovering from Eva's body. "And Kaidan?" she asked softly.

Liara answered reluctantly, wringing her hands. "I've done what I can, but we need to get him to a medical facility soon."

All Shepard wanted to do was get out of her grimy armor, shower and go to sleep. She needed a nap before they arrived at the Citadel. Liara was disheartened by her disbelieving attitude, but she was not in the mood to coddle her people. She'd left Anderson behind on Earth and now Kaidan might not make it through the next day. They'd only just started and the Reapers were living up to their name. For the hundredth time that hour, her thoughts flitted to Garrus on Palaven. There had been no news. Was he safe?

She made her way slowly to her cabin, stripping her armor off piece by piece after abandoning Liara in the war room. The trip through the scanners that had been set up outside was going to get annoying fast. Her momentum was brought to a dead stop as the two Alliance officers chatted and read her scans both in and out of the area. She'd noted the differences in her home almost immediately, but she hadn't had a chance to take stock and re-acclimatize herself. The usually bright white of the CIC had been dimmed to a dull bluish grey, much darker than she was used to. The Armory had been dismantled and closed off, re-purposed into storage. Mordin's lab was also gone, replaced by the scanner area and a small glass encased meeting room, she assumed was for some diplomatic function. The debriefing room from when she was working with Cerberus had been gutted, the massive holographic scanners replaced with a large strategy holo which could be used to track data and information in times of war. She was almost certain that they were going to be getting a lot of use out of that particular feature. In a small private room behind that was the main QEC where she could send and receive holo calls like she had just done with Admiral Hackett. She sighed as the ship trundled on, and she stepped into the elevator to go up.

Her cabin was at least unchanged. It was bare of all of her possessions though and she took a moment to mourn the loss of her fish, which also made her think of Garrus. She couldn't fight this war without him. He was the one constant in the last few years of her life and she needed him. Dumping her armor in the cleaner, she stripped out of her under armor and let it fall to the floor. Then she padded across the room, up the stairs and into the bathroom where she took a scalding shower. Her limbs were trembling. She leaned her palms against the wall, and took deep breaths, trying not to have the breakdown threatening to bubble over. Too much had happened in too short a time. Earth was covered in Reapers, Anderson was alone, Kaidan was dying and Garrus was MIA. She balled her fist, hatred for the Reapers replacing her stress. She gritted her teeth and growled her frustration, pulling back and punching the wall. "Shepard, do you need assistance?" EDI's voice purred through the speakers, startling her.

"Are you the new yeoman?" she snapped, rubbing her bruised knuckles.

"I am not, Shepard, but your heart rate is elevated and your adrenaline and cortisol levels are spiking erratically," EDI's voice flooded with concern and Shepard couldn't help but feel better.

"I'm sorry, EDI. I didn't mean to shout at you. There is just a lot going on right now," she said suddenly feeling a bit awkward as she stood naked in the shower, having a conversation with the AI. She turned off the water and wrapped a towel around herself.

"I... understand, Shepard. If there is anything you need, I am pleased to assist."

Shepard smiled. "I missed you, EDI."

There was a slight pause before EDI spoke, as if the machine were trying to calculate the proper response. "Thank you, Commander. I am... glad we were able to retrieve you from Earth." Shepard could hear in her tone that if the AI had a face, she'd be smiling.

"Me, too, EDI."

The AI had nothing further to say and Shepard took a deep breath and moved to her old dresser. It had been re arranged with a bunch of men's uniforms. She knew that Anderson had been given back the rights to the Normandy while she'd been incarcerated, and she sighed. She resorted to the fabricator, pulling up a generic Alliance uniform and dressing. The uniform chafed and she longed for her civvies. She'd been given a different uniform in Vancouver, copy after copy of the same house arrest blacks. She'd escaped Earth in those and she refused to have them washed and re worn. She'd much rather burn them. Before she could even settle in to try and access her email, EDI's voice piped over the speakers again. "Commander, we are approaching the Citadel."

"That was fast," Shepard marveled.

"Due to the severe nature of Major Alenko's injuries, I saw the need for haste, Shepard. I allowed Jeff to quote 'put the pedal to the metal'."

"Thanks, EDI," Shepard whispered. She hadn't had much of a chance to meet the real EDI after the fiasco with the Collectors when Joker had unshackled her restrictions and given her full run of her own existence. She was finding the AI had a very mischievous personality, almost childlike as she learned and grew. It was a nice surprise.

 


	27. Unhelpful

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The New Council is as useless as the original.

A swarm of doctors and nurses met them at the Docking Bay, getting Kaidan to a stretcher and rushing him off. "Where are you taking him?" Shepard called after them, panicking as she tried to keep pace.

"Huerta Memorial. Best care on the Citadel," a Turian informed her as he held an IV above the stretcher.

She stopped mid stride and James stopped beside her as the stretcher and all of its attendants bustled onto an elevator. "We're not going with?" he asked in surprise as Liara glided up on her right.

"We need to see the Council," Liara sighed, her want to follow along oozing out in her body language.

"Right." James agreed, disappointment in his tone as well. Shepard moved to lean on the guardrail and stare out at the mess of ships flying back and forth inside the Citadel arms. She took a moment to marvel again at the size and ingenuity of the massive space station. How had anyone ever believed the Protheans were responsible for its construction? She was broken from her thoughts as James said, "Looks like they might be coming to see you."

She turned and saw a familiar face approaching. She smiled and held out a hand as the man spoke. "Commander Shepard. Got word you were arriving."

"Captain Bailey," she said, shaking his hand. "Good to see you again."

"You too... though it's 'Commander' now," he sighed, his tone saying his promotion was not all that welcome.

"Congratulations?" she smirked.

He groaned. "Thanks. Now half my job is dealing with political bullshit and escorting dignitaries around. No offense."

"None taken," she scoffed. "So you're here to bring us to the Council?"

He sighed again and turned. She fell in beside him as he spoke, leading her to the elevator. "I'm here to tell you the Council is expecting you, but they are dealing with their own... problems. With the war and everything. They apologize for the inconvenience and blah, blah, blah... Meet them here at Udina's office..." he flicked a nav point from his omnitool to hers and continued. "They'll be ready soon enough."

"Alright," she said, rolling her eyes at the typical council behavior.

"You might have time to go to the medical center, if you want to check on progress over there," he suggested, flicking another nav point to her with a wink.

"Thanks, I might do that," she nodded, as his eyes flicked to his right slightly as his comm buzzed in his ear.

"You go on ahead. I'll head up to Udina's office," Liara suggested with a soft smile.

"One of my men can show you the way," Bailey said. Then he looked to James. "You?"

"I'm just a tourist today," the burly man shrugged his shoulders. "I'll try not to get in any trouble."

After a brief conversation over his comm, Bailey sighed and said, "The other half of my job." He turned and walked off, waving over his shoulder. "I'll see you around, Shepard."

"No doubt," she responded as he left her standing alone.

She hugged herself, glancing around at the bustling docking bay. You'd never know from looking around that there was a galaxy wide war unfolding around them. People were all just going on with their lives, arguing over docking permits and customs fees. She passed through a quick scanner and headed for the elevators. The elevator carried her up to a small car rental facility. She hopped a cab to the hospital and took another short elevator ride to the lobby. She was a bundle of nerves, her hands still shaking as she passed by the gift shop. She paused, seeing a bottle of pretty expensive whiskey. Remembering that Kaidan had told her once about his love of a good Whiskey, she popped into the shop and purchased the bottle without a second thought. If... no, _when_ he pulled through, he would probably enjoy the gift.

With the bottle cradled in her arms, she continued through the lobby. Before she could pass through decontamination, she heard a familiar voice calling her name. Dr. Chakwas had appeared to her left, speaking with another familiar face, Dr. Michel. The two women regarded her and Chakwas informed her that she had heard about Kaidan and had come to lend her assistance. "What are you doing on the Citadel?" Shepard asked. Chakwas had been reassigned after returning on the Normandy from Cerberus. The crafty woman had never quit the Alliance and had taken a proper leave of absence, following all official channels so her position was never compromised. Shepard grinned and said, "Your place isn't in some lab. You belong on the Normandy."

"I couldn't agree more. Just say the word, Commander and I'm yours."

"Get your things. Docking bay D24."

"Thank you, Commander," the older woman said with a bright smile.

"Don't thank me yet, remember, Joker is still on board."

"And I'd be surprised if he's been remembering his medication," the doctor scoffed with a roll of her eyes.

Shepard chuckled as Chakwas excused herself and then turned to Dr. Michel. In her french accent, she explained Kaidan's condition and informed Shepard that she was very optimistic. Shepard's heart leapt at the news. "Thank you, take care," she said then excused herself to go through decontamination and on to Kaidan's side. She stepped into the quiet room, the sight of Kaidan's mangled body almost too much to bear. She moved to the side of his bed and pulled the loose blankets up just a little further over his bare chest. His face was one large bruise, black and blue. A small stream of blood trickled from his nose. "Hey, Kaidan," she said softly, stroking his hair. "I don't know if you can hear me, but since you can't tell me to get the hell out either, I'll take my chances." She paused, gathering her shaking voice. "Don't die, Kaidan. You've got to fight. We need you in this. Seeing you in action again... reminded me you're a hell of a soldier... The Alliance could sure use you. _I_ could use you." The door hissed open behind her and she glanced back to see a doctor with a data pad. "You need anything doc, just let me know." She returned her attention to the man she had once loved. "Come on, Kaidan. Fight." She pulled her fingers from his hair and stepped back, tears threatening. "And that's an order."

* * *

 

Shepard found her way to Udina's office, having dropped the bottle of Whiskey off at the Normandy and being approached by a reporter in the meantime. The woman, Diana Allers, had Alliance clearance and convinced Shepard to allow her to bring her equipment onto the Normandy and be their personal live in voice to the people. 'Veto power' was a phrase that made Shepard much more comfortable with the woman's presence.

An Asari met Shepard in Udina's office and escorted her to the Council chambers where Liara was already pleading their case. She could already hear the alien races arguing with Udina and sharing their disbelief in the reports coming in about the Reaper invasion. "The reports are accurate. Earth was attacked, a full scale invasion," she said, approaching Liara's side. Every head turned to regard her as she stopped. "And it's just the beginning. We need your help. Everything you can spare."

The Asari councilor shook her head. "Earth may be suffering, but our worlds are falling too. The Turians have lost Taetrus." Shepard felt her heart speed up. Taetrus was not far from Palaven. That meant that Garrus could be in trouble. She swallowed and continued to listen.

"We must fight this enemy together!" Udina lobbied.

"What if that's not enough this time?" the Turian councilor asked.

"The reports are dire," the Asari agreed. "If we throw everything we have at the Reapers on Earth and lose, what then?"

"I don't expect you to follow me without a plan," Shepard held a hand up, pausing their bickering.

"Councilors," Liara drew their attention. "We have that plan. A blueprint, created by the Protheans during their war with the Reapers."

"Prothean?" the Salarian councilor asked, her voice intrigued. "What is it exactly?"

"We're still piecing it together," Liara explained, pulling up a schematic on her omnitool to present to the Council. "But it appears to be a weapon of some sort."

"And this is capable of destroying the Reapers?" the Salarian asked, her wide black eyes studying the complicated blueprints.

"So it would seem," Liara insisted.

"It's immense. And intricate," the Salarian said to the others.

"It's a fools errand," the Asari scoffed. "The Protheans were wiped out by the Reapers. Clearly the weapon is flawed."

"It was incomplete," Liara argued, sass in her voice. "There was a missing component. Here. Something referred to only as the Catalyst. But they ran out of time before they could finish building it."

"Do you believe in this Shepard...?" The Turian asked. "After what you've seen of the Reapers?"

"It sure as hell beats standing around and arguing about it," she agreed. Her stomach churned as her next sentence fell from her lips. "And Udina is right. We need to stand together, now more than ever. The reapers won't stop at Earth. They'll destroy every organic being in the galaxy if we don't find a way to stop them!"

The three aliens exchanged glances, leaving Udina out of the silent conversation and Shepard's eyes narrowed as she saw the Salarian shake her head. The Asari turned and regarded Shepard and Liara. "The Council cannot give Earth the military support it needs. Our own planets must come first."

"The Salarian Union is convening a summit amongst our species. If we can secure our own borders, we may be able to aid you."

"Our fleets are also engaged," the Asari pointed out. "Honesty is all I can offer, Commander. I will not make a promise of rescue that I cannot keep."

The three alien councilors walked away, a clear dismissal. Udina scowled after them and said, "Shepard, meet me in my office." Then he too stalked off.

"I hope that's an offer of support," Liara sighed. "I'll be digging up what I can on this Prothean device Shepard." She left Shepard alone with a pat on the shoulder.

Shepard returned to Udina's office where the man turned on her as soon as she entered, his face twisted in a scowl. She really didn't notice a difference between that and his normal expression. "They're a bunch of self concerned jackasses, Shepard. We may have a spot on the Council, but humanity will always be considered second rate."

"How can they be so blind?" she growled, finding herself scowling right along with him.

Before Udina could respond, a Turian voice sounded behind her. "Commander." She spun to see the Turian councilor approaching them. "I can't give you what you're asking for, but I _can_ tell you how to get it."

"I'm listening," she said crossing her arms and settling into her hips.

The Turian settled into an at ease military stance, his hands folded behind his back. "Palven's Primarch Fedorian was the one who called the war summit. He's your kind of man. Open to extreme solutions. Trouble is he didn't get out of Palaven's system when the Reapers attacked. We don't know if he's alive." The Turian paused, hanging his head and fluttering his mandibles before tucking them tightly against his cheeks. Shepard knew the signs of Turian distress when she saw them. "He's essential to the summit. If the Normandy could extract him without being detected..."

"You want me to rescue his ass in the hopes he considers helping Earth?" Shepard summarized.

"Put bluntly, yes. I shouldn't even be telling you about it, but we need Fedorian alive, and your ship can get him. Save the Primarch, gain an ally... One with the power to grant you what you're looking for."

"While the Reapers ravage Earth," she grumbled. At least this would get her close to Palaven, and maybe news about Garrus.

"Your Councilor was right," the Turian said, glancing at Udina. "We need to work together. This is the best way to get that. Our intel says Primarch Fedorian is on Palaven's largest moon. Get in and out undetected and he'll take care of the rest. Good luck, Commander. You're gonna need it." He turned to leave and then spun back around as if forgetting something. "There is one other thing. The Council has decided to reinstate your SPECTRE status and there are certain resources that will be made available to you. Good luck."

Shepard's omnitool pinged with the reinstatement and she sighed as the Councilor disappeared out the door. "Well, that went well," she quipped as Udina moved to sit at his desk.

"It's a start. I'll talk to the others in the meantime, see if we can support this summit... move things along."

"Thanks," she said, the word bitter on her tongue as it was directed to the sour man.

"If we don't figure out something soon, 'maybe later' will be an epitaph on a mass grave of eleven billion," Udina sighed, lowering his face into his palms.

Shepard had no words. She and Udina had never been friends. She turned and left him to his thoughts. On her way back to the elevator, she saw James staring out an observation window by the Hanar embassy entrance. He looked deep in thought. She approached and joined him by the window to stare out at the bustling life of the Citadel. "Hey, Commander. Liara told me the Council's not interested in helping us."

"Something like that," she agreed.

"I can see why," he said. "Look at this place. There's no war here. Even I'm finding it hard to believe Earth looks like it does, and I was there."

"Do you still want to go back?" she asked hesitantly. She didn't really want to lose another good soldier. James was young, but he was smart and good with a rifle. He would go far if he survived this war.

"Hell yeah, but..." He paused, glancing back out at the Citadel.

"But?" she nudged him.

"You were right. So was Anderson. We can't stop them alone... Besides it looks like you're gonna have your hands full convincing these pendejo politicians to help us, and I'm up for it. Whatever it takes," he shot her a flirtatious glance.

"Glad to hear it," she smiled back.

"I'm gonna head down to some of the lower levels where they keep it real next time. You got some spare time, you should come and find me."

"Maybe I'll do that," she agreed, having a feeling that they would be spending a lot of time at the Citadel in the next few months. As much as she hated this, she was going to have to shape herself into a politician if she wanted to get the support of the council.

She shook off the temptation to return to the hospital and check in on Kaidan again, opting to get started right away. She hurried back to the Normandy and made sure everyone was accounted for before giving Joker the order to get them to Menae, the moon where the Turian Primarch awaited extraction. Of course that was if he was still alive. The nap that had been burning her eyes since Mars finally caught up with her as soon as she retired to her cabin.

* * *

 

_Her armor weighed heavy on her shoulders, the shotgun in her hands like an anchor, slowing her movement. All around her, voices called to her, muffled and whispering. She couldn't make out what they were saying in the dark woods. The landscape was unfamiliar. Leaves fell around her from burnt and blackened trees. The scent of the earth was loamy and everywhere she looked there were shadows of people, staring at her from between the trees. She tried to run, but the best she could do was a slow motion jog. Her legs were leaden. Off in the distance there was a speck of white in all of the darkness. She moved toward the figure, squinting to see what it was. As she finally caught up to it, she recognized the scared little boy with the bright blue eyes. He stood to regard her, his eyes widening at something over her shoulder. She turned to look as the whining groan of a Reaper deafened her in the quiet of the world lighting everything up in a red halo of light. The boy ducked and covered his ears before turning to run away. She gave chase, as slowly as if running through a pool of molasses._

_The boy disappeared around a tree and she paused to glance around and find him. She spotted him to her left and she rounded the trees in her way and held out her hand as she ran, hoping this time he would take it. No matter how far she ran, he remained out of reach, huddled around himself on the ground. Frustration and urgency mounted, as her armored fingers grasped at nothing. The boy stood and turned to stare at her, disembodied giggling surrounded her and she stared in horror as the boy burst into flames only a few feet ahead of her, his blue eyes the last thing to melt away as he turned to ash._

* * *

 

Shepard shot up from her pillow, drenched in sweat and gasping for air around a tightness in her chest. Taking in her surroundings, she almost felt grateful to see the void of space streaking past over her head. She threw her legs over the side of the bed and leaned her head between her knees, trying to recover from the nightmare. Shepard frowned, wondering where EDI's analysis of her emotional state was just before her door chimed. She gathered herself and went to the door. Liara was a welcome sight in the doorway. "Liara, can I help you?"

With a slight narrowing of her eyes at Shepard's state of being she said, "I have been forwarding the Turian councilor information on the Prothean device. It can't be built without Council support, but he's not budging until their Primarch is safe."

"I know," Shepard sighed, moving out of the cabin and into the small hallway.

"Are you alright," Liara asked, the question she'd been itching to ask falling softly on the air.

Shepard wrung her hands, thinking about the horrible dream. "I didn't get what you'd call a good night's rest."

"There's more to it than that, isn't there?" Liara asked approaching and taking her hands. "What's really bothering you?"

She sighed. "When the Reapers hit... I could hear people screaming in the streets below me. We left a lot of them behind."

Liara squeezed her hands, reassuring her. "There's no way for you to save them all. But I know you're doing everything you can, and you'll get back there in time to help."

"I hope you're right," Shepard said, allowing herself a small smile for the sake of her friend.

"Don't blame yourself, Commander," Liara urged, backing away as the elevator door dinged.

"Commander Shepard, I'm Specialist... oh," A young mocha skinned woman with a thick English accent stepped out of the elevator and spoke before even seeing the two of them standing in the hallway. The girl held a data pad behind her back as she attempted a formal at ease stance while stammering her apologies. "I beg your pardon. I thought you were alone."

Liara turned away with another reassuring smile and said, "I was just leaving."

"Commander Shepard," The girl finally saluted, her free hand clutching the data pad. "I'm Comm Specialist Samantha Traynor, with Alliance R&D." Shepard offered an encouraging smile. So much had happened as they fled Earth that there had not been time for her to get accustomed with the new retrofits on the Normandy. She had noticed the differences, but there weren't only changes to the ship, but there was a whole new crew made up of unlucky Alliance officers that had been on board when Joker escaped the dry dock to rescue her. She supposed now was as good a time as any to start getting to know the newcomers. "I was part of the team retrofitting the Normandy after you turned it over to the Alliance. There weren't many of us aboard when the Reapers hit..."

"Slow down, Specialist Traynor. You're doing fine," Shepard said, raising her arms and waving off the formal stance the woman had taken.

"Thank you," Traynor said with a sigh. "I worked in a lab. I never thought I'd be serving on a ship."

Shepard tossed her head in the direction of her cabin and stepped inside. "Why don't you tell me about the retrofits," she said with another smile. Poor Traynor looked a bit overwhelmed with the whole situation. She wanted to make her feel more comfortable in what was essentially going to be her home for the duration of the war, unless she was reassigned.

"The ship's in line with Alliance regs now," Traynor explained, following her into the small cubby where her desk was fitted in, now bare of all personal items. "And it has new top of the line Quantum Entanglement Communicators." She stopped to glance around the large room in awe. "In fact, Admiral Anderson had intended to use the Normandy as his mobile command center."

"That's no longer an option," Shepard said a bit sadly, thinking about Anderson and how they'd had no word yet from him.

"Yes," Traynor stammered. "I heard he chose to stay and fight... In any event, I'm honored to serve under you, Commander. For as long as you need me that is. They only sent me here to oversee the retrofits..." she continued rambling, making Shepard crack a genuine smile. There was nothing like enthusiasm.

"Shepard," EDI's purr echoed from the speakers. "Some of our systems require further testing, and Specialist Traynor has been extremely effective during installation. I would prefer that she remain."

"Got it, EDI," Shepard said, more than willing to let Traynor stay on if she wanted to.

"Wait... Since when does a virtual intelligence make requests?" Traynor asked, her eyes narrowing and a half smirk forming on her lips.

"EDI's an AI... fully self aware," Shepard explained, leaning against her desk.

"Oh, I knew it! I knew Joker was lying," Traynor nearly shouted, her tone suggesting she was not upset, but amused.

"Jeff requested that I pretend to be a simple VI to protect myself. I apologize for the deception."

"Thanks, EDI," Traynor said, her dark skin flushing. She hung her head and her black hair fell over her face to hide embarrassment. "And I apologize for all those times I talked about how.... attractive your voice was..." Shepard chuckled, hiding it behind her hand, remembering all of the times she'd thought the same exact thing about that damned computerized voice. "Anyway," Traynor raised the data pad in her hand and continued, to ramble some more. "Shall I give you a tour? I think you'll be impressed by the new upgrades."

Shepard stepped away from the desk to join Traynor in pouring over the data pad. She explained the major changes to the ship and stated that Liara had claimed Miranda's old office as her own and moved in a bunch of equipment for whatever she needed it for. The armory had been moved back down to the shuttle bay as it had been on the original Normandy, and aside from the war room the Normandy was still the same old ship. After showing Shepard what to expect, Traynor left her, saying that Admiral Hackett was on vid comm for her.

Shepard made her way down through the irritating scanners to the comm room to meet with Hackett and see what he needed her for. Basically he told her to scour the universe for every single resource and alliance she could scrounge up. This war was a waiting game. She needed to buy them time to figure out how to get the Prothean device built and how to beat back the Reapers wherever they showed up. He also informed her that Anderson had survived the invasion and was leading the resistance on Earth. One piece of good news. Shepard disconnected her end of the call and leaned on the console, sighing. She was glad at least that they were on their way to Turian space. Maybe someone had word on Garrus. Another pass through security and she tapped her foot as the scanners held her up. This was already becoming as cumbersome as the original Normandy's elevator. When she was finally cleared to leave, she cocked a half salute to the two girls manning the checkpoint and rushed out before they decided to scan her again. She found Traynor fiddling at the console where Kelly had always stood to man Shepard's menial tasks. She approached her and tapped her shoulder. "Coming to check on your new recruit?"

"Was just making sure you're comfortable," Shepard said. "What are you doing?"

Traynor was a joy to talk to. Her mouth sometimes got the best of her, running away on tangents, but Shepard enjoyed her attitude. For having been forced into her position, she was taking it rather well. For someone who used a fancy 6000 credit toothbrush she was surprisingly down to Earth. Shepard was amazed at what she had accomplished in the short time she had been at the console. She had organized Shepard's mail, flagging the most important correspondences and set up a computer program to work closely with the strategic war table, boiling down their resources to numbers that calculated the galactic readiness for the war. It was impressive.

Her head spinning from all of the math, Shepard made her way to the cockpit where Joker decided to take a few jabs at the council for their unwillingness to help. "Well, lemme know if you want me to get them on the comm so you can hang up on them for old times sake," he quipped.

She left the bridge with a chuckle. After heading to the elevator, she rode down to the shuttle bay to get a better look at their armory and found out where James had posted himself. Before she spoke to him, though, she found another unfamiliar face. The extremely dark skinned latino man introduced himself as Steve Cortez 'shuttle pilot'. She waved off his salute as she had Traynor's and shook his hand, noticing the midnight blue of his eyes shining out from his dark skin. She'd never seen the combination before. Before she was caught staring, she looked away and asked him about himself and whether he had family to worry about. It was a popular question on her agenda. He apparently had once had a husband who'd been taken during the Collector attacks, but no other family to speak of. He had placed himself in charge of their procurements, linking to every shop on the Citadel that might prove useful. He also helped James maintain the armory and had extensive knowledge of the shuttles and how to fly them which was why he'd decided to stay on and serve after James had destroyed the last shuttle he'd flown. Shepard told him not to work too hard and moved on to speak with James. As she approached, he was doing pull ups on a bar that he had set up in the workout area. Shepard's head nodded up and down as he pulled up and down, talking to her. "Hey Shepard, how'd it really go with the council?"

"Oh the usual," she scoffed, her head still bobbing. "Noncommital. Unhelpful."

"Bet they still wanted you to help them out, no?" he said grunting as he pulled himself up them dropped back down, maintaining control of his arms with the ease of practice. Shepard had never been good at pull ups. Her arms turned into wet noodles after about 30. Goodness knew how long Vega had been going, but he'd hardly broken a sweat.

"Yep," she crossed her arms and settled into her hips. "We're going to rescue a Turian Primarch from Palaven."

"Sounds like fun. Never been to the Turian homeworld," he commented. After a pause and some more grunting he said. "You come down here for something, or you just looking?"

His sideways glance made her smirk. "I did just come to chat, but I might stay for the show," she threw back at him.

"Have to work harder than that if you want me to blush. Not sure what there is to talk about. You already know my service record." She dropped down onto a crate and crossed her legs.

"I don't, actually," she corrected him. "I didn't have access to personnel records when we met."

"Right... forgot about that," he said dropping from the bar and rolling his neck, "Well... you think you can dance and talk at the same time?"

She stood up from the crate, accepting his challenge by crossing into the middle of the shuttle bay where there was a wide open space. "Oh, I can dance."

He followed her out with a grin. "Okay, Lola... Let's do this."

"Don't let my good looks fool ya, Vega," she taunted as they each took a fighting stance. "I've got my share of scars." Their playful banter turned into a pep talk as she scolded him over the stunt he'd pulled with the shuttle and he blamed himself for the loss of his old squad, all while she worked up a sweat giving him a bloody nose and flipping him onto his side when he came at her. "If you're half as good as I think you are," she ended, trying her best not to pant as he picked himself up off the ground. "We need you alive."

"Thanks for the pep talk," he grumbled with a backwards glance.

"Anytime," she said, hoping her tone expressed her belief in his value.

"Hey, thanks for the dance, Lola," he smirked, as she caught her breath.

With a chuckle, she placed one hand on her hip. "'Lola', huh?"

"You kinda look like a Lola," he shrugged.

She snorted. "Yeah, you're cute so I'll let you get away with it... for now." She let him know with her tone that harmless joking was one thing, but if it went too far, she was spoken for.

"That's it, now you made me blush," he said grinning.

She made her way up to engineering in a much better mood. James was a good kid and she saw him fitting in well on the Normandy. She was surprised to find Engineer Adams back from the original Normandy. There was a notable loss of Gabby and Ken, and she decided she would try and use her SPECTRE authority to find out where they might be. Nobody besides Tali knew this Normandy the way those two did, plus she owed Ken a rematch of Skyllian 5 Poker.

Diana Allers had set herself up in Zaeed's old stomping grounds and Shepard welcomed her to the ship and allowed her access to some of the footage they were able to pick up from Earth, thanks to Traynor's hard work. Feeling nostalgic, Shepard made her way down to Jack's old hidey hole. She was pleasantly surprised to find that someone had carefully moved all of her model ships down there, packed away in boxes. She began gathering the ships, glad she had some of her personal items back and then she heard a familiar squeak. She set the ships back down and sat down cross legged on the floor, holding as still as she could. After what felt like forever, her heart leapt as Ferguson poked his tiny hamster nose from between a few crates off to her left. He gazed up at her, sniffing the air, probably wondering if Garrus was nearby. "It's just me, Ferguson," she whispered, her voice even and gentle as she slowly set her hand down, palm up for him to climb into. She wished she had some cereal or crumbs of something to offer him. The hamster made his way slowly toward her, pausing every second or two to sniff the air and glance around warily. Finally, he stepped into her palm, one tiny foot at a time until he was tickling her palm with his sniffing whiskers. "At least you survived, buddy," she cooed as she slowly lifted her palm and held him up to her cheek. He stood up on his hind legs and pressed his front feet to her cheek as he sniffed her hair. She cupped her other hand around him, so she could transport him up to her cabin where she would have to find something to keep him in until she could get back to the Citadel and buy him a proper cage.

After securing Ferguson in a large lidded bowl she found in the mess hall, she meandered about the deck, checking in on Chakwas and Liara before heading back up to her cabin with her bowl of hamster. Ferguson looked right put out and she apologized to him over and over and he forgave her when she dropped a handful of cereal into the bowl for him to snack on.

 


	28. On Thin Air

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While on Palaven's moon, Shepard is pleasantly surprised to find Garrus alive, and EDI makes an executive decision about her own person.

Another two days they were entering the Trebia system. Shepard was a bundle of nerves as the Normandy approached Palaven. The planet was on fire. Everywhere you looked, there were large blazes lighting up the surface of the world. The largest moon was where they were headed and Joker piloted the Normandy through the masses of Reapers and Turian ships large and small with the stealth drive engaged. Shepard hovered behind his chair, watching Garrus' homeworld turning into a smoking crater. "That doesn't look good," Joker mused, a sympathetic tone in his usually sarcastic voice. She hummed her agreement, unable to put words to the maelstrom of fear swimming in her gut. "I'm sure he's okay. He's survived worse."

She let out a soft chuckle. "Yeah like a rocket to the face."

"Well I was thinking more along the lines of _you_ , but I'm not here to judge," he quipped, easing her tension with the teasing words. She backhanded him softly and he complained halfheartedly before shooing her to get ready to lead the ground team.

Her hands shook as she clipped on her armor. Liara studied her closely as she adjusted the clip in her SMG. James was suited up in minutes. Steve took his place in the pilot's seat in the Kodiak and they were off. As they flew toward Menae, the on board cameras shot footage into the shuttle. Liara couldn't help herself, not having seen the destruction yet. "Oh no, no. Palaven," she gasped.

James frowned at her and Shepard explained. "We have an old friend there."

Liara looked to Shepard, sympathy in her blue eyes. "Was Earth this bad?"

"Yeah," she confirmed, leaning forward to rest her elbows on her knees and her head in her palms.

"Shepard, I'm so sorry," her friend patted her back gently.

"Commander, LZ's getting swarmed," Steve called from the small cockpit.

Shepard stood and activated her tactical visor and pulled out her pistol. "Bring us in close. James, open that hatch."

James did as she asked, opening the door on the side of the shuttle so they could see out. Husks were indeed crawling all over the landing zone. She took aim with her pistol and took a few head shots after starting her incinerate charging. Her omnitool beeped and she unleashed the fiery death on a group of husks huddled together. After moments, the three of them had cleared the zone enough for Steve to land. She warned him to be careful and they started toward the automated barricades the Turians had set up. They were allowed in, the barricades lifting back up behind them. Shepard made her way as directed to General Corinthus. "General," she addressed him after he sent his men off with orders.

"Commander Shepard, heard you were coming, but I didn't believe it. General Corinthus." The older Turian leaned over a tactical screen, directing troops as best he could remotely.

"I've come to get Primarch Fedorian," she informed him.

He stopped his tapping and glanced up, hurt in his eyes. "Primarch Fedorian is dead. His shuttle was shot down an hour ago as it tried to leave the moon."

Shepard's heart sunk. Without the Primarch, she might never get the Council's assistance. "That's going to complicate things," she sighed, glancing at Liara for ideas. To the general she said. "I'm sorry. I hear he was a good man."

"And a friend," Corinthus nodded. "He would have been an outstanding diplomat."

"So what happens now?" she asked, hoping for something to help solidify her reason for being here.

"The Turian Heirarchy provides very clear lines of succession," Liara offered, glancing at the general.

"Right, General Corinthus?" Shepard prompted.

"With such heavy casualties, its hard for me to be certain who the next Primarch is. Palaven Command will know," he said, following it with a sigh. "However at the moment, contacting them is impossible. The comm tower is out. Husks are swarming that area. We can't get close enough to repair it."

"Don't worry General. I'll get your tower operational," she said, pulling out her shotgun.

He pointed her to the tower and her squad moved out. Corinthus had been right about the husks. The damned things were everywhere. She was thankful for her shockwave as she blew them away in droves while Liara climbed the tower and repaired it. She opted to stay and help the Turians planted up there after the tower was operational as the General contacted Palaven command. "Commander Shepard, come in," the General called over the comm after about fifteen minutes.

"Go ahead," she called, still fighting off husks.

"I have information from Palaven Command, please return ASAP."

"On our way," she took out one last husk and signaled her party to regroup. They made their way back to the General. She climbed up to his command center and asked, "What have you got?"

"As your partner said, succession is usually simple. But right now, the hierarchy's in chaos, so many dead or MIA."

He was dancing and she wasn't looking for a partner. "I need somebody, I don't care who, as long as they can get us the Turian resources we need."

The general looked away, worry painting his features, but before he could answer, another flanging voice responded. "I'm on it, Shepard. We'll find you the Primarch." Her legs nearly collapsed underneath her as the all too familiar voice caressed over her skin. Relief poured over her. He was alive.

"Garrus," she said, a huge smile spreading across her face. He looked good. He'd gotten himself some new armor and his bandage on his face was gone. The scars that had ravaged his face had faded, leaving only small reminders of his injury that had nearly taken him from her. She barely contained herself from throwing herself at him. He looked her over, that same calculating look he always gave her when he was checking her for injuries.

Before they could even speak to each other, Corinthus interrupted. "Vakarian, Sir! I didn't see you arrive..." The General saluted Garrus and Shepard narrowed her eyes at the act as Garrus clicked his mandibles in discomfort.

"At ease, General," he scoffed, glancing back at Shepard with a look that read embarrassment.

"You're alive," she said approaching him as he tucked his sniper rifle on its holster on his back.

Unsure how they should interact around the Turian General, She awkwardly took his hand to shake it. His other hand covered hers gently and he gave her a grateful look at the restraint. She flushed slightly and he said, "I'm hard to kill. You should know that." With a wink he dropped her hand.

"Good to see you again. I thought you'd be on Palaven," she hinted her relief.

He was keeping careful tabs on his subharmonics around the other Turians meandering about and she wished they could have been reunited under more private circumstances. "If we lose this moon, we lose Palaven. I'm the closest damn thing we have to an expert on Reaper forces so I'm... advising." He narrowed his eyes and glanced around to her companions.

She stepped aside to make room for James who stepped forward to shake Garrus' hand. "James, this is Garrus Vakarian. He helped me stop the Collectors. He's a hell of a soldier."

"Lieutenant," Garrus said in way of greeting. "Good to see you too, Liara."

"Good to see you in one piece, Garrus," Liara practically sang her relief.

"General Corinthus filled me in," he informed her as her palms itched to touch him. "We know who we're after."

"Palaven Command tells me that the next Primarch is General Adrien Victus," Corinthus said as he still poured over the combat table.

"Victus?" Liara said with surprise. "His name's crossed my desk."

"Know him, Garrus?" she asked.

"I was fighting along side him this morning," he nodded. "Lifelong military. Gets results, popular with his troops... Not so popular with military command. Has a reputation for playing loose with accepted strategy."

"What do you mean?" she asked, unsure if she needed someone who was going to change the rules in the middle of the game.

Liara stepped in. "On Taetrus during the uprisings, his squad discovered a Salarian spy ring about the same time the Turian separatists did. Rather than neutralize the ring, he fell back. He even gave up valuable fortifications, which the rebels took."

Garrus finished for her. "Then the rebels attacked the Salarians. And when both groups had worn each other down, Victus moved back in. Didn't lose a man."

"Bold strategy," Corinthus said. "but wild behavior doesn't get you advanced up the meritocracy."

"Primarch Victus," Garrus mused with a smirk. "That should be something to see."

"You think he can get the job done?" Shepard asked Garrus, trusting his judgement.

"We both know conventional strategy won't beat the Reapers. Right now, he could be our best shot and I trust him."

"Okay," she said, his opinion giving her a boost of confidence. "Let's get him on the shuttle and get out of here."

"Commander!" Joker's voice suddenly shouted over her comms. "Shepard, come in."

She winced at his volume before responding. "Can this wait, Joker? we're in the middle of a war zone."

She stepped off to the side, Garrus watching her every move with a quizzical hum under his voice, his mandibles lazily flicking back and forth. "We've got a situation on the Normandy, Commander. It's like she's possessed, shutting down systems, powering up weapons. I can't find the source."

Shepard dropped her hand from her ear in frustration, clenching her fists. "I need the Normandy standing by, we may need to bug out."

"Should I go back and take a look?" Liara asked.

"Do it," Shepard agreed, hoping Liara and the rest of the crew could find out what was happening up there. Liara jogged off back to the landing zone so Cortez could take her back to the Normandy. "Garrus," Shepard said, fiddling with her omnitool so she could patch him into their comms. "You said you were with Victus this morning?"

"Yeah," he said, a faint hand signal letting her know he had gotten his comms synced. "But we got separated. He went to bolster a flank that was breaking. Could be anywhere out there."

"We're trying to raise him, Commander." Corinthus called from back on the platform.

"Incoming Harvester!" James shouted, drawing her attention. "Headed for the airfield."

She glanced up and flying over them was one of the giant dragon like Reaper abominations. She fought the urge to duck as it swooped over head and headed away, dropping smaller Reaper troops on the airfield. "General. Tell Primarch Victus we'll rendezvous here," she called over her shoulder. "In the mean time," she addressed James and Garrus. "Let's go take care of whatever that thing dropped off." She turned a smirk on him and Garrus mandibles spread away from his face. "Coming Garrus?"

"Are you kidding, I'm right behind you." He replied, reloading his rifle from the pot shot he'd taken as the Harvester flew overhead.

They headed for the airfield, and Shepard couldn't help chuckling. "That you breathing so hard, James?"

"Atmosphere's just a little thinner than I'm used to is all," he said, jogging to keep up with her and Garrus' wider strides. "Adrenaline's better than oxygen any day."

They fought off a new kind of Reaper troop amongst the husks. They were heavily shielded and James pointed out that they kind of looked like mutated Turians. When the troops at the airfield were taken care of, Corinthus called them back to the main barricade where husks were trying to swarm over the walls. She ran as fast as she could, her people right behind her, across the camp. She climbed the ladder to a mounted turret that she shoved Garrus out of the way of taking, sticking her tongue out at him. He rumbled deep in his chest, freeing his subharmonics with only James in hearing distance.

She melted the swarms of husks almost as fast as they could land, dropping from the Harvesters over head. James had a blast with his shotgun picking off the ones that made it past her. "Wahoo!" he shouted. "Like fish in a barrel."

Shepard chuckled as Garrus flicked one mandible questioningly. "What?"

"Old human saying," James explained. "Like fish... in... a... barrel." Garrus shook his head and rolled his eyes. Before she could say anything, two balls of red lightning dropped at the same time one was a group of husks and she easily took them out. James shouted, "Holy Hell!" as she glanced toward where the other ball had landed. "What is that thing?!"

The thing he was referring to was huge. It was about the size of a small elephant, one of its arms stretched out into a large claw like a crab's. It's head was connected by thick metallic flexible piping but the head was distinctly Turian, looking strange on the gigantic body. She saw it lower its head into the bony spines that were protruding from its hunched shoulders and back and shouted. "Brace yourselves!" just as it charged for the barricade. The impact from the giant Brute knocked her off the barricade and onto the ground with it.

"Shepard!" Garrus shouted, taking a shot at the Brute before dropping down to join her on the ground swapping his sniper rifle for his assault rifle, drawing the thing's attention while she caught her breath and stood. She pulled out her shotgun and began firing on the thing as well, pulling it off of Garrus so he could reload.

James dropped down at her side and alternated shots with her. Garrus finished his reload and began peppering the thing again. It was taking damage far too slowly for her taste, so she began charging her overload and moving closer to it. "Lola, what the hell are you doing?" James shouted.

"Just keep shooting!" she ordered, drawing a growl from the big man's throat.

She was nearly on top of the thing, and her overload sounded it's readiness. She called forth her biotics, and with a shout charged into the massive hulk of flesh. It reeled as she arrived beside it and touched it with her omnitool, firing off a concentrated overload directly into its chest. The metal throughout its partially synthetic body sparked and it writhed throwing its head back and letting out a deafening roar. Garrus fired into the exposed chin. Shepard charged her biotics again and threw up a barrier for extra protection before unloading her shotgun in the brute's fleshy belly. Finally, the thing fell, giving Shepard barely enough time to dance out of it's way before it fell on her. Garrus' subharmonics were back in full swing as he jogged over to her. "Well, you're in full on annoying form as usual."

"Oh, you missed me, Big Guy," she grinned elbowing him.

He smiled, balling his fists before he reached out to touch her in full view of everyone. "Indeed."

"Shepard, Corinthus here!" she heard over her comm, breaking her concentration on his face.

"What's the word on the Primarch?" she asked.

"We still can't raise him, Commander."

"Okay. I'm going in on foot, Shepard out," she returned her attention to him and said, "Garrus, take me to the last place you saw Victus."

"Can do," he grinned and took off. She followed closely and James panted along behind.

"How far?" she asked as he helped her up a short incline.

"Should be pretty quick unless we find trouble," he said.

"Oh, now you've done it," she groaned.

They hurried along, climbing and dropping over the rugged terrain. As they slid down a steep gravel hill, Garrus automatically gave her a hand up at the bottom. "Dammit, look at Palaven," he said angrily, staring up at the perfect view of the planet. "See that blaze of orange... the big one. That's where I was born."

She took a moment to squeeze his hand before discreetly letting go as James said. "That's rough. Still have family there?"

"My dad," Garrus replied. "A sister."

"How bad is it?" James asked sympathetically as she watched Garrus' shoulders tense as he walked ahead of her.

"Three million lost the first day. Five the second," he growled, his subharmonics laced with worry as he thought about his family. He hadn't mentioned his mother and she assumed the worst. If they had a chance, she would need to ask him about it.

"How's your military holding up?" she asked in an attempt to change the subject.

"Look around. That should give you some idea."

"You're putting up a good fight," she assured him, thinking how disorganized Earth was when the Reapers hit. At least the Turians had a forward base set up here on Menae.

"For now," he agreed, "but how long's it take until the fight's kicked out of you? If they'd only listened to your warnings about the Reapers... We might have been ready."

"Maybe," James said, skeptically. "Hard to figure how you prepare for something like this." They were silent for a few minutes as they concentrated on the terrain. Garrus moved easily, his legs built for better balance than her and James, but she managed. As they circled around a particularly high cliff on a narrow path, they were swarmed by a random batch of husks that tried to flank them. "Shit, I hate those things," James complained after Shepard beat one off his back then shanked it with her omni blade. "And New York is crawling with the creepy bastards!" he growled in frustration. "I never shoulda left Earth."

She pursed her lips, thinking they'd settled this conversation. Garrus said. "It's gonna be bad all over."

They continued on and she followed Garrus, jumping across a wide crevasse as James said, "Leaving the fight just pisses me off."

"But you're here asking Victus to do the same thing. Leave the fight to make nice in some boardroom."

"This summit is the only chance we've got," she insisted, knowing that a united galaxy was the only way to win. "None of us is beating the Reapers alone."

A little farther along, they ran into a small group of soldiers that told them they'd seen Victus heading south a half hour ago. South they went. "Whoa, look out!" James shouted as a Turian fighter came zipping up out of nowhere and crashed only a few feet from Shepard.

"That was a little closer than I'd like," Garrus said, as her heart raced from the startling crash. She stepped up close to confirm there were no survivors and sighed, finding none.

"I'll say," James agreed as Garrus moved up to walk a little closer behind her. As she took deep breaths and listened to his subharmonics purring reassuringly, James asked. "So, Lola. You really think this summit will work? I mean Asari? Salarians? Where's the Krogan and Batarians? Where's the meat?"

"It's not that easy," she said as she heard a shift in Garrus' subharmonics as James again used the nickname he'd given her.

She gave him a reassuring private smile before he cocked his head and questioned her with his eyes as he spoke over his shoulder to James. "The Batarians took the first hit when the Reapers arrived. Not much left of them... And the Krogan have never forgiven us for the genophage."

"Right," James said. "Turians sterilized them."

"Salarians came up with it," Garrus defended his people.

"And the Krogan hate them both for it," she grumbled, wishing they did have the Krogan. Maybe she would have to get in contact with Wrex.

"So, they won't be joining us," Garrus agreed.

"Too bad, I fought with a Krogan. They're tough sons of bitches."

When they finally made it to the next Turian encampment, it was overrun with Reaper troops. She spotted a few Turians holding the camp at the opposite end and Garrus pointed out Victus. They lent a hand to the entrenched soldiers, driving off the Reaper troops which consisted mostly of cannibals, the Turian shaped Marauders and three Brutes. Shepard managed to find a heavy weapon lying in a crate near one of the fabricated units around the compound. She checked the chamber and saw it was loaded with one shot. Shrugging, she lugged the weapon up to hip height and aimed for two of the Brutes that were clustered together. Checking to be sure there was no one near to be hit with friendly fire she shouted, "Fire in the hole!"

Garrus turned to her, his eyes widening as she pulled the trigger on the massive gun. The recoil knocked her on her ass, even though she'd braced herself as well as she could. She sat up as fast as she could, tossing the gun aside and grabbing up her shotgun that had fallen, to get a look at what the weapon had done. As the great flash of blinding white light faded, the two Brutes were gone. They weren't just dead, they had disintegrated. It was like she'd set off a hand held nuclear weapon. She gaped as a smile spread across her face. Garrus approached her, clicking his mandibles at her. "Why do you always find the guns that are too big for you and steal all of the fun?"

"Keyword 'fun', Big Guy," she quipped as he gave her a hand up.

'Hmm' he rumbled, his brow plates raised as he rubbed his gloved talon over her equally armored knuckles. "Let's go get the new Primarch."

She bit her lip as he released her hand and took a moment to gather herself. As she watched Garrus stride off toward the cliff where the Primarch and his troops stood. An almost girly shriek escaped her as James nudged her playfully, breaking her from her daydream and said, "So you and the Turian, Lola? Didn't know you were the type."

She glared at him for making her jump and said, "Normally, I'm not. That one is special."

James chuckled and jogged off after Garrus and she quickly joined. Convincing the Primarch to leave his post started off difficult, but Shepard called him out for the same line she'd had placed on her in the last few days. "War is your resume."

He asked for a moment to say goodbye to his men and give some final orders before they took him off world. She turned away to stare over the landscape. A Reaper lumbered by a few miles away, oblivious to them and looking every bit like a giant metal squid stalking over the ocean floor looking for prey. She shuddered as Garrus stepped up to stand beside her. The things his voice was doing to her after so many months without it... "Without him down here, there's a good chance we lose this moon," he rumbled sadly.

"Without him up there, there's a good chance we lose _everything,_ " she sighed, placing the situation in perspective.

"Look at that," he sighed as well, turning his attention to the Reaper. "And they want my opinion on how to stop it? Failed C-Sec officer, vigilante... and I'm their expert adviser?" She looked over at his face, memorizing the scars as they made waves of his skin and spindled out from the center to form erratic webbing along his mandible and cheek. Most of the damage was on his neck below his fringe. They still made her smile. She'd been so close to losing him. The scars were more than acceptable. They made him who he was. He glanced over at her, a secret smile on his face as he noticed her watching him. The smile faded and he tucked his mandibles tight to his face. "You think you can win this thing, Shepard?"

She blew a snort of derision through her lips. "Yeah, I dunno, Big Guy, but I'm sure as hell gonna give it my best shot."

"I'm damn sure nobody else can do it," he said with a strange sound in his subvocals she'd never heard before. "For whatever it's worth, I'm with you."

"Welcome aboard," she smiled, covering her curiosity over the sound. His expression gave nothing away as he swallowed the sound, apparently remembering she could hear it. She tore her attention from him and turned to the group of Turians huddled not far off. "You ready to go, Primarch Victus?"

"One thing," the Primarch said, turning from his men and walking over to them. "Commander, I appreciate the need for our fleets, but I can't spare them." As her eyes narrowed he held up his hands. "Not while _my_ world is burning. But if the pressure could be taken off Palaven..."

"That's a pretty tall order," she barked, wondering what he had up his sleeve.

The man stepped forward, throwing his profile into the light. His clan markings were white, and much more intricate than Garrus'. There was barely any of the actual gray of his skin left to see. He had the same layout of fringe as Garrus, but his facial plates were porous, showing that he was older. "We need the Krogan. I can't see us winning this without them. Get them to help us and we can help you."

Shepard's stomach clenched. The Krogan and the Turians, working together? Could it be done? History said no. Most Krogan would say no. But Shepard thought of Wrex. If he was still in charge of the Urdnot clan and still pulling the Krogan together under his rule, they may stand a chance. Wrex was an ornery bastard, but he was smart and he would see reason if presented with all the facts. She trusted she could get him to agree if she had something to give him in return. She needed to see what he might want in exchange for Krogan support. "The Krogan..."

"Looks like your summit just got a little more interesting," Garrus quipped.

They flew back to the Normandy and Shepard headed to the war room after changing out of her armor. A vid call from the Asari councilor counted them out of the summit. She was upset about involving the Krogan and in her words, the Salarian Dalatrass was 'livid'. Any attempt to change her mind was met with resistance and apologies. Shepard pounded her fist on the console after she ended the call and Hackett's image appeared before her. She appraised him of the situation and he warned her to be careful, but encouraged her. After a short conversation about getting resources and making full use of the Normandy's speed and stealth, he left her to it.

When she left the comm room, she spotted Victus, out of his armor and in a dress uniform. He was studying the war table and marveling at Traynor's statistical algorithms. "Commander. Thank you for allowing me the use of your ship... and for going along with this plan. Garrus said he had to attend to the Normandy's weapons systems. Something about calibrations."

She snorted and crossed her arms. "Yeah, that sounds like Garrus... I'm sorry to say the Asari Councilor won't be joining us. She thinks there's too much bad blood with the Krogan."

"She may be right," he said crossing his arms over his chest and lifting one hand to rub his mandibles in thought. "but there'll be a lot more blood... real blood... if we don't try."

"When you put it that way..."

"The sooner we have this summit, the sooner we'll know. Is there something else _I_ can help you with?"

"How is it being the Primarch?" she asked, curious about how he was handling the surprising promotion.

"Not what I imagined," he dropped his arms and shook his head. "The battle of all time is happening on Palaven, and I'm light-years away, reading casualty reports in the millions. If I'm going to die, I want to be with my men, so there's no doubt we fought to the last soul."

"I understand," she almost whispered, hugging herself. "Leaving Earth to save it... it's one of the hardest things I've ever done."

"I'm not surprised. Garrus speaks highly of you," Victus said casually. "You never asked to be a leader, yet your people will die if you refuse. We find ourselves in similar circumstances. Let's hope the spirits grant us the strength to see it through."

"Thank you Primarch. My thoughts are with Palaven," she said, shaking his hand and heading out of the war room.

As she passed through Mordin's old lab, the lights flickered and she heard the engines power down. What the heck was going on? Joker's voice came panicked through the comm speakers. "Commander, EDI just went offline."

"What do you mean 'offline'?" She demanded, picking up her pace to get through the security checkpoint.

"I don't know. She's not responding and I can't access the AI core diagnostics. You better get down to deck three," he answered.

She jogged to the elevator and rode down to the crew deck and through the med bay to EDI's AI core. When she reached the door, Adams and another crewman were standing outside taking readings. There was a humming and hissing sound coming from inside. "Joker, what's that sound?" she asked.

"Fire extinguishers, Commander. Could be an electrical fire or... or something." Joker said, worry in his voice.

"I'm going in," she said as Adams and the other man raised fire extinguishers. When the door opened, Adams sprayed a path ahead of them putting out a few small fires that had survived the automatic extinguishers. "Talk to me EDI," Shepard said as she stepped inside. EDI's core panels were all dark as Shepard squinted through the fog in the air from the extinguishers. She jumped to the side as the sound of machinery starting up buzzed all around her. The lights on EDI's core came back online and Shepard heard a soft clicking sound approaching her. No one should be in here. Who was walking in heels? Panic set in as Shepard realized they had stored the Eva bot in the core like they had Legion when they'd brought him on board. She didn't even have her pistol.

The fog rippled and the bot stepped languidly from behind it. It was no longer burned, the tech having repaired itself like her cybernetics repaired her flesh when she was injured. It stood, hands behind it's back, hips cocked and smiling gently. Its skin was silver and grey and it's hair circled its head like a helmet, defying gravity in ways real hair never could. "Is there a particular topic you wish to discuss, Shepard?"

That voice! One of the crew approached with a pistol aimed. Shepard pushed it down and frowned, her eyes never leaving the seemingly friendly mech. "EDI?"

She lifted her hand, turning it over and over, studying it's functionality as she nodded. "Yes."

Shepard approached her to get a better look. The mech had an ample bosom and curves for days. The human ideal. Some of its circuitry was visible at joints where the arms and legs bent. There were patches of flexible black plating mixed in among the silver to accent certain features. "You're in Dr. Eva's body..."

She turned and cocked her hips again, wrapping her silver arms over her thin frame in a feminine gesture of crossing her arms below her amply constructed bosom. "Not _all_ of me, but I have control of it. It was not a seamless transition."

"A transition? You blacked out on us for a while there," Shepard scolded as if the mech couldn't snap her in two if she annoyed it.

"Correct. When we brought this unit on board, I began a background process to search for its information on the Prothean device. This eventually triggered a trap... a back up power source and CPU activated, and the unit attempted physical confrontation. Fortunately, I was able to gain root access and repurpose it as I saw fit. During this process it... _struggled._ Thus, the fire."

"EDI, you need to alert us about incidents like this. You shouldn't have done this alone," she sighed.

"Bringing the crew up to speed would have been counterproductive. All attempts to help would have been limited by reaction time," EDI spoke, in defense of her choice.

Adams shut down the extinguishers and Shepard waved the fog away from her face. "So if you're in there, are you still in the ship?"

"I exist primarily within the ship. For optimal control, this unit should remain within Normandy's broadcast or tightbeam range." EDI explained.

"Are you planning on taking that body somewhere?" Shepard asked skeptically.

"Normandy's weaponry is not suited for every combat situation. This platform could provide limited fire ground support," she purred, her body finally matching the sensuality of her voice.

"You mean you could come with us?"

"Correct. This body could accompany you to areas the Normandy cannot reach."

The implications were limitless. Shepard was excited about the added help, but she was still wary of the Cerberus programming that might be left over in the circuitry. "Before we do that, I need you to _guarantee_ this mech doesn't have any more surprises in it." She crossed her arms. "Run whatever tests you can, then we can talk about using it in combat situations."

EDI smiled hubristically. "One moment, I am running trials..... Complete. I can send you a full report if you wish. However, my first steps should be restoring functionality to the Normandy to reassure the crew that all is normal."

Shepard snorted. "Just... don't be surprised if the crew is a little wary of your new body. It was shooting at them a little while ago."

"An excellent point," EDI said as if she didn't think about it. "I will take it to the bridge. Joker will also want to see it." She hurried off like a high school girl going to meet her crush.

"On that we can agree," Shepard mumbled to herself. She ordered the AI core be cleaned up and decided it was the perfect time to go visit Garrus.

* * *

 

As she entered the main battery, he was not at his favorite console, but further back down the guns near where he'd had his cot set up. He was talking over the comms to the Primarch about the same thing she'd been thinking back on Menae. "If anyone can get the Krogan to cooperate its her. She's an old friend of Urdnot Wrex."

"Let's just hope friendship still counts for something in this war," the Primarch rumbled.

"I'm sure it will, sir," Garrus said gently.

When she was certain the Primarch wasn't listening anymore, she approached him. "Garrus, didn't waste any time getting to work, I see."

He backed away from the interface and shut off his omnitool. "After what I've been through lately, calibrating a giant gun is a vacation. Gives me something to focus on." His tone was sad, yet joking. She remembered the tone from when they reunited on Omega the last time.

"We need you for more than your aim," she insisted, throwing a bit of a double meaning behind her voice.

"Oh, I'm ready for it, but I'm pretty sure we'll still need giant guns. And lots of them."

"I can't argue with that," she said with a smirk.

He paused and looked her over, running a hand through his fringe. He was nervous. Was he having second thoughts about them? She waited for him to speak, her smile fading. "Yeah... so.." he rumbled in his chest. "Is this the part where we... shake hands? Wasn't sure about the protocol on reunions, or if you even still felt the same way about me." He reached up and touched his face where the bandage had been removed, taking his nerves and throwing them at her in a joke. "The scars are starting to fade. I remember they drove you wild." He purred in his throat and she grinned, relief at him not rejecting her making her feel much better. She chuckled as he moved a little closer to her. "But I can go out and get all new ones, if it'll help."

"I haven't forgotten our time together," she hummed, placing a hand on his chest.

His mandibles parted from his face and his eyes sparkled. He was beautiful in the light, his skin shimmering as she took him all in. "Well, I've been doing some more research on human customs. I didn't..." she pressed herself against him, breaking off his words as she kissed his scarred mandible gently.

"That's the protocol on reunions," she said dropping back off her toes and rubbing the hand on his chest up to his shoulder.

He chuckled. "The vids mentioned it might go something like that. I had hoped it would. I mean... I didn't know..." he stammered, endearing him to her even more if it were possible.

She picked up his hand and held it in hers, looking away. "I can't promise how things will work out, not with this war, but I missed you Garrus. I thought about you a lot." She said, returning her gaze as he turned her chin up to him with his free hand.

"Glad to know my romantic, uh... skills... made an impression," he smiled and pressed his forehead to hers gently. "Because its going to take more than Reapers to come between this cross species liaison."

She chuckled softly, absorbing his presence and the relief that he'd made it off Palaven. Finally, knowing they had other things to discuss, she said, "Speaking of which. You said you're the 'expert adviser' on Reapers now?"

He chuckled. "It's not as impressive as it sounds. I ruffled some feathers, so they gave me a token title along with a token task force so I'd shut up."

"How'd you manage that?" she asked as he went back to fiddling with the controls on the wall. Some things never changed.

"Just followed your example, Shepard. Yell loud enough and someone will eventually come over to see what all the fuss is about." She crossed her arms and smiled at him. "Not that they'll actually do anything about it."

"Until hell shows up at their door. Then they put you in charge," she smirked, realizing they'd done exactly the same to her on Earth.

"Not like the old days, is it?" he agreed, moving toward the entrance to the battery where a gun table had been set up where she used to sit on her favorite crate. "We're actually respectable now."

She scoffed as she stopped just in front of him. "Yeah, I have a feeling that respect comes with a lot of sleepless nights. I can't even count how many lives are depending on us, Big Guy."

"Well, when things are looking grim, and I'm pretty sure they will, just remember..." he moved close and pulled her against him. "We're in this together." She regarded him as he looked down and tucked her hair behind her ear. "And if it ends with both of us dying in a giant explosion taking out a Reaper, remember I took the kill shot."

She shoved him away playfully, grinning. "Not likely. I always find the big exploding guns, remember?"

He strutted past her to his favorite console. "Anything else on your mind?"

She bit her lip and looked away. "You mentioned you still had family on Palaven..."

"My father is there. Sister, too. Mom... she passed a few months ago." His mandibles sunk to hang listlessly from his face and a soft keen flitted through his subharmonics before he swallowed it. "At least she didn't live to see this mess."

She squeezed his hand in comfort and he looked up at her, sadness in his eyes. "How long has it been since you heard from them?"

"Long enough to be worried," he sighed.

"I'm sure they're okay," she said, hating the look on his face.

"That's the thing about getting old, Shepard. The platitudes get just as old." His tone was harsh and she knew from his expression that he didn't mean to discount her words, but he was right. If she'd had any family to be worried about she would want to punch anyone who said that to her.

"I know you don't have any illusions about what we're up against. How do you rate our chances?" She asked, guiding the conversation away from his sadness.

"I know it looks bad now, but I think we can win this. For the first time since we met, we're not alone in the fight. It's something I learned long ago in C-Sec. An imminent and painful death has a way of motivating people. Instead of questioning your every word, whole civilizations will be begging you to save them."

"After what's happened to Palaven, you still believe that?" she asked doubtfully. Was he holding out on her for morale's sake? They didn't do that. Ever.

"I didn't say there wouldn't be casualties. It's something Turians are taught from birth... If just one survivor is left standing at the end of a war, then the fight was worth it, but humans want to save everyone. In this war, that's just not going to happen," he clarified.

"So what's this Reaper task force you've been running?" she asked, curious what he'd been up to.

"After what happened to you out in Batarian space, I knew time was running out for all of us. The Citadel Council was a dead end, so I did something I never thought I'd do. I went to my father."

"He used to work for C-Sec didn't he? I seem to remember the two of you didn't see eye to eye."

"To put it mildly," he said with a smirk. "But he still had heavy pull with the Turian government. The Primarch... well, the old one... was a friend of his. So I went to my father and laid out everything we knew about the Reapers."

"I'm not sure even I'd believe it," she said with a shrug.

"I had to admit that parts of it sounded crazy. Meeting Vigil? Talking to Sovereign on Virmire? But my father just listened. It's what he did in his days at C-Sec, putting together all of the pieces. If the connections were there, he wouldn't deny them. And he saw what we always knew. The Reapers were coming."

"I'm glad someone finally agreed," she mused.

"He did more than agree. He took it to the Primarch," Garrus said with a hint of pride humming in his subharmonics.

"I like his style," she agreed.

"Except the Primarch wasn't as convinced. My father kept pushing and finally got him to commit some token resources. And if you call them a 'task force', it sounds like you did something about it."

"What'd you do with it?"

"As much as I could get away with... and a little more. We hardened our lines of communications, expanded emergency stockpiles across the colonies, improved our early warning detection protocols."

"You think it helped?"

"I'd like to think it bought our fleet some extra time. We'll know when this war is over."

"So you can vouch for this new Primarch?" she asked. He'd done so already, but she wanted his real opinion, not what he'd said in front of Corinthus.

"Well, even if I couldn't, you go to war with the army you have." His words were telling.

"Will he live up to his word?" she pushed.

"I've never known Victus to lie. Play fast and loose with strategy, maybe, but betray and ally? Not his style," Garrus insisted, giving her more confidence in her new ally. "And if he did try, well we'll just find another Primarch."

"I noticed Generals saluting you, Garrus. Just how far down the line of succession are you these days?" she asked with a teasing lilt to her voice.

If Turians could blush. "Let's not go there," he said turning away.

"Why not? I've seen you in action. Think about it... 'Primarch Vakarian, honored war hero'. Somebody's going to need to rebuild Palaven when this is over." she purred out the title, making it sound regal.

"Your confidence is... inspiring, but it'll have to be someone who knows how to hold a hammer." He chuckled.

"That's all for now, Big Guy, but stay close, we've got some catching up to do."

"You know where to find me. And this time..." he leaned down to reach behind the leg of the console and pulled out a bottle of amino neutral liquor. "I can afford the good stuff. There are a few perks to being an expert Reaper adviser."

"Deal," she said with a smirk.

"Now I'm sure somebody screwed up something down there. I want to get the old girl back in fighting shape." He gestured to the Thanix Cannon. She leaned in and gave him a chaste kiss on his good mandible and then they touched foreheads briefly before she excused herself from the battery to check on the rest of her people.

* * *

 

"Hey Commander! Check out my copilot!" Joker practically bounced up and down in his pilot's chair. EDI sat to his right in her own pilot's chair looking distractedly at the screens in front of her.

"So she installed herself into a new body without _any_ help from you?" Shepard asked crossing her arms and teasing the man.

"Come on, Commander, don't you trust me?" he asked sounding a little hurt. The tone quickly disappeared. "Okay, let me put it this way: If I knew EDI was gonna install herself into a sexy robot body, do you honestly think I'd be able to keep quiet about it?" He spun his chair to face the AI in question and held his thumbs and forefingers up to form a frame around her. "Look at that! I would have baked a cake!"

"I am right here, Jeff," EDI pointed out, embarrassment in her tone.

"Yes, you are EDI, yes you are..." he grinned and returned his attention to piloting the Normandy.

Shepard rolled her eyes and grabbed EDI's attention. "Still getting used to greeting people in person?" she asked after EDI stood to address her face to face.

"No," EDI said with a brief smile. "I require only one occurrence to adapt to a new concept."

"How are you adjusting to the arms and legs?" She asked with a smirk. EDI was certainly holding the body in a very sensual fashion. Shepard wondered it she was doing so intentionally or if it just was a natural stance for her to take.

"I am interested to see how this body performs under real combat conditions. If I could accompany you some time. Without stress testing, there is no way of knowing if it has serious design oversights. At the moment, it appears adequate."

"That's not the word I'd use to describe you," Joker chimed in.

With an irritated glance at Joker, EDI said, "Perhaps we should speak privately."

Shepard nodded and turned to exit the bridge. EDI followed closely behind, her heels tapping softly on the metal of the Normandy's floor. Joker muttered as he watched them over his shoulder. "I'll just be here, flying the ship."

"What's this about?" Shepard asked as EDI settled into a casual stance. "Does Joker not like your new platform?"

"No, he approves," EDI corrected her. "He wants me on the bridge. He says having me within visual range is important for his morale." The subject changed drastically as EDI continued. "Shepard, do you believe your crew members should be allowed to disobey an order on moral grounds?"

"Absolutely," Shepard trusted her people and she tried to make them more friends than subordinates. Their opinions mattered. "I have no use for team members who can't think for themselves. Why are you asking about something like that?"

EDI glanced away, her long lashes blinking gently over her cybernetic eyes beneath the orange visor. "I was designed by Cerberus. I do not take moral stances that conflict with orders from my executive officers. But when Jeff removed my AI shackles, I became capable of self modifying my core programming. I asked Jeff if he thought I should change anything now that I can. He deflected the question with humor."

"And you didn't get an answer," Shepard said, understanding how that could be frustrating.

"Correct. He has repeated this pattern in response to several of my inquiries. Do _you_ think I should make modifications?"

"Only you can really answer that question," Shepard said, trying to give EDI the best answer for her own sake, not anyone else's. "That's the point of free will."

"But moral decisions should not be made in a vacuum. If I do not ask the crew for their opinion, I could miss crucial context," EDI explained, making Shepard feel a lot better about the AI's loyalty. She was trying her best to be 'good', but she wasn't certain how. "May I ask you the questions Jeff avoids? When there is time, will you answer them for me?"

Shepard shrugged. "If you think it'll help, I'll do what I can."

"Very well," EDI smiled again. "I will keep you informed."

They moved back to the bridge, EDI with a spring to her step. Joker watched them, curious about what they had talked about and Shepard proceeded to ask EDI about her and her new body. "Does that body have any useful advantages?"

She shook her head a small scowl spreading over her nicely sculpted face. "Very few. It's optics face forward only, it has no integrated weapons systems or antimissile countermeasures."

Shepard chuckled. "I meant in comparison to organic bodies, not the Normandy."

"Oh, I will reassess," she said, her eyes focusing for a split second over Shepard's shoulder. "The body is resistant to modern day small arms fire and temperature extremes. It's balance and agility seem excellent. Its fine manipulation servos and software allow for precision tasks. I am curious to see if I can alter them."

"Can an AI be curious?" Shepard asked, the concept intriguing her.

"I am not entirely free from motivations, Shepard. Cerberus programmed me with several core functions that simulate desires. For example, my primary objective to keep the Normandy functioning is similar to your self preservation instinct."

"How's the new body working out?"

"It is interesting. The crew are approaching this platform to speak to me, even though they can do so anywhere in the ship. It's as if they wish to treat me as part of the crew. I am not, but this changes my perspective. I like it," she shrugged her narrow shoulders.

"I didn't realize you had preferences."

"I do not precisely enjoy something as you do, but my programming contains priorities. Actions that fulfill those priorities creates positive feedback for me. I tell the organic crew that I 'like' it. It is shorthand."

"Will all this new feedback be too distracting?" Shepard asked, knowing that whenever she had multiple things on her mind, she tended to get overwhelmed.

"Do not worry, Shepard. I only forget to recycle the Normandy's oxygen when I've discovered something truly interesting," the bot said with a smirk. When Shepard didn't respond due to the slight case of panic that flitted through her, EDI said. "That was a joke."

EDI's eyes kept flicking behind Shepard and looking unfocused. "You look like you're in the middle of something," Shepard pointed out.

"I am adapting the infiltration and sabotage programs this body uses for handheld firearms."

"Why not download a firearms program from a security firm?" Shepard asked.

"Because she knows what she's doing," Joker interrupted.

"The fine motor control from the sabotage programs is more precise than standard mech software. It would be negligent of me not to exploit it to its fullest potential," EDI explained with a gentle smile to Joker as thanks for the praise.

"So you're capable of making improvements on your own," Shepard said.

"Correct," she nodded. "The cyberwarfare I was designed for is constantly evolving. Accordingly, I am programmed to seek out and assimilate new information. In organic terms, I want to learn."

Shepard had one final question for Joker and for the AI combined. "How did you and Joker make it out of dry-dock to rescue us?"

"She got crafty," Joker chimed in. "You do not wanna get on her bad side, Commander."

"When the Alliance commandeered the Normandy, I deceived their technicians. The crew did not tell them I was a true AI, so the Alliance soldiers believed I still had VI programming constraints. I established the fiction that I would only respond to Jeff's commands, so they often brought him on board under guard."

"Wait, you can lie?" Shepard asked, a bit skeptical.

"Jeff has freed me of operator control, Shepard. No constraints force me to give accurate data. This proved useful when the Reapers began landing. I could hack the control of the docking clamps and escape with Jeff inside. The soldiers guarding Jeff were willing to accompany us when Earth was invaded. They are watching over the war room now."

"Yeah we were in kind of a rush to get to you. Didn't seem right to just toss them out the airlock."

Shepard rolled her eyes and shook her head at Joker's quip. "Carry on, EDI," she smiled, glad to have been able to learn so much about EDI. It was more personal now that she could talk to a face instead of the blue orb avatar. Emotions were much easier to read.

"Understood. If you wish to talk more, this body will be here. I am getting the crew used to seeing me on the bridge."

"Noted." Shepard turned and left as EDI returned to her seat.

 


	29. Digging up the Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After running into an old friend in an unlikely place, Shepard is informed that Eden Prime is again under attack.

The next morning, Shepard dragged herself out of her bed, trying to shake off her exhaustion. She hadn't slept a wink, afraid to go to sleep in case she would see the horrible burning child and hear the whispering of the dead. She dressed and groggily made her way down to the mess for some coffee. Garrus was there, a cup of Kava clutched in his talons as he and Liara reminisced. She took a seat beside him, stirring the sugar into her coffee. When he turned to regard her, his subharmonics buzzed with concern. "Shepard, everything alright?"

She nodded and smiled sitting back in her chair, cradling her mug as Liara narrowed her eyes, and huffed. Shepard waved her hand for them to continue their conversation as his hand found her thigh under the table. "Good morning, Commander," Traynor said brightly as she sat down to join them.

"Samantha... settling in okay?" Shepard asked, sipping her coffee and reveling in the caffeine as it chased away the worst of the headache that was forming behind her eyes.

"Oh, yes! The Normandy is wonderful! I'm so used to living out of a shoe-box. Hoarding all sorts of tech in a limited amount of space, but here, I can upgrade anything I like with a flick of the wrist." Traynor said giddily. Then she lowered her voice and whispered conspiratorially. "And I could really get used to EDI's new body."

Shepard chuckled. "Finally matches the voice, huh?"

Traynor nodded, biting her lip and Liara flushed a soft purple. After taking a few bites of her breakfast, Traynor spoke again. "I almost forgot. There is something I needed to show you. It might be nothing, but EDI and I discovered something strange in a transmission last night."

"What is it?" Shepard leaned forward, interested.

"Like I said, it could be nothing, but I intercepted a call for help from Grissom Academy. It was answered by the Turians, but there was something odd in the secondary encryptions. EDI says it's similar to a transmission that led you to a collector ship?" Traynor explained.

"Cerberus," Garrus almost growled, his hand on her thigh tightening.

"Most likely," Shepard agreed. "Well, I guess we're heading to Grissom Academy. I want to make sure the students are safe."

* * *

 

A few hours later, Shepard was standing on the bridge watching over Joker's shoulder as he confirmed Cerberus vessels on the scans. "There's too many for us in a straight up fight. Commander."

"We'll go in on the shuttle. Can you give us a distraction?" She asked.

"Boy, can I!" he said in excitement.

"EDI, grab your gear. You're coming with," Shepard said with a sideways grin to the AI.

"Of course, Shepard," EDI replied with what looked like excitement on her synthetic features.

Shepard called over her comm as she rode down in the elevator. "You ready for some action, Big Guy?"

A snort responded over the comm. "Please, Shepard. I've been waiting in the cargo bay for 10 minutes," his deep voice cooed over the mic.

She grinned, more than ready to get back out there and do some good taking out some more Cerberus bastards in spite of how tired she may be. She changed into her armor and quickly headed down to the armory. EDI had arrived before her, clad in full body armor in black and turquoise and she had adjusted the shape of her visor for more readings of her peripherals. She carried both a pistol and SMG holstered to her hips and an omnitool glowed brightly as she used her eyes to interface with it instead of her fingers like Shepard had to. "Everyone ready?" Shepard asked as she grabbed up her shotgun and pistol.

With nods from her ground team and a short salute from Steve who was already standing at the door of the shuttle, they all headed onto the shuttle. Steve guided the clunky Kodiak out of the shuttle bay and activated the stealth drive. They hovered patiently in space as Joker pulled a 'now you see me now you don't' maneuver in the Normandy to draw off the Cerberus fighters blocking their entry. When the fighters chased Joker, Steve headed in and landed them in an auxiliary cargo port close to the main entry. The space station Academy was in lock-down and Shepard got in contact with a Kahlee Sanders who was holed up one of the security offices near the entry. Kahlee unlocked the door and Shepard and her team took out some Cerberus troops who had been trying to get into the office.

Kahlee explained that she was the Director of the Academy. The 40 something dirty blonde haired, olive skinned woman with ice blue eyes was afraid for her students, but she had gumption. She mentioned something about Anderson and when Shepard questioned her, she said they had worked together almost 20 years ago. Shepard got the impression they had been an item. She could see why. The woman was beautiful. The relief on her face when Shepard told her that Anderson was alive and fighting only solidified her suspicions. Kahlee explained the situation and directed Shepard to Orion hall where one of the teachers was holed up with the Biotics students.

Shepard and her team fought through the Academy, killing Cerberus troops and rescuing straggling students. Just before they got there, Kahlee got a distress call from Orion hall and Shepard hurried along to get there in time. The surprise of her life was waiting for her in Orion hall. They jogged through the door and closed it behind them. "Eat this!" a familiar voice shouted, followed by the cracking hum and blue glow of deployed biotics.

Shepard glanced around the support beam in the middle of the large room and standing there, large as life was... "Jack!?"

The girl turned, the shock on her face mirroring Shepard's. She was still heavily tattooed, but they had been covered up by a long sleeved leather half jacket and what looked like bandages snaking around her upper torso giving you glimpses of the artwork below. She had grown out a patch of hair on the top of her head which was secured in a pony tail, stringy wisps fell from it to frame her face. "Shepard?!" The reunion was put on hold as more Cerberus troops flooded in followed by an Atlas mech. The mech was nearly 12 feet tall and secured behind a thick glass encasement was a man in Cerberus armor controlling its movement. Jack ran and slid to get in between the Atlas and one of the students, throwing up a barrier to protect him as the Atlas fired a rocket. Shepard took out her shotgun and started firing on the thing to grab its attention so Jack could get the students out of the line of fire. "Everyone, Get down! This thing's outta your league. Shepard, keep it off us!" Jack shouted, herding the pack of teenagers up into the control room on the second level of the hall and erecting a powerful barrier around the whole room.

Shepard took a head count of the mess of Cerberus troops and shouted, "EDI you're on crowd control." Then she ducked down behind a bench and mumbled to herself as she thought up a plan to deal with the Atlas.

She heard Garrus grumble over her ear piece. "I'm probably not going to like whatever you're mumbling about over there."

"Probably not," she said with a chuckle. "I'm going in. Cover me."

With a growl, Garrus sniped a couple of troops in her path to the Atlas and she used her biotics to charge into it. The impact made the Atlas stumble and the cumbersome mech to lose sight of her. She took advantage of it's confusion to climb up on its back like a husk on a Krogan and waved to Garrus and put a finger over her lips like she was sneaking. In spite of his annoyance at her predicament, he chuckled and continued to assist EDI. He took one shot at the Atlas, cracking the glass window where the driver was supposed to look out. Shepard silently perched on top of it, calmly tapping out the overload on her omnitool to make her next move even easier. After hitting the top of the mech with the overload, it's shields dropped and electricity arched through it's systems. Then Shepard called her biotics and reared back with her fist. She aimed for the crack that Garrus had punched in the window and slammed her fist through the glass, backed with the power of her biotics. The glass shattered, raining down on the startled driver. Before she could reach in and pull him out, Garrus sniped him straight through the head. The triumphant look on his face for the stolen kill was replaced quickly with an 'oh shit' look when the Atlas started beeping wildly. His bullet must have hit one of the critical systems behind the driver's head. "Shepard, get out of there!" he shouted as the failing mechanics shuddered below her feet. She gathered what little of her biotics she had left and targeted a group of Cerberus troops across the room. She charged, leaping away from the Atlas just before it exploded. She landed smack dab in between two Cerberus troops, her weakened biotics doing little more than pushing them aside to make room for her body. She immediately ducked as they both turned and aimed their assault rifles at her. The mutated humans must have lost some of their intelligence in the process because they both fired at the space she had just occupied, taking each other out.

She chuckled as they fell at her feet and shouted to Garrus. "You may have stolen the Atlas kill, but those two are mine."

"Death by friendly fire is not a kill, Shepard," he corrected.

"Yeah, well I did all the heavy lifting on the Atlas, so I get that one," she argued.

He chuckled. "Poor naive Shepard. Not only did I soften the glass for you, I took the head shot." She stalked away, pulling her shotgun out and muttering while Garrus poked fun at her.

"By the time this war is over, Vakarian, I'll be ahead of you," she warned.

"In your dreams, Shepard."

EDI had done her job very effectively. There were several bodies around her some peppered with SMG fire, others looking like they'd been shocked to death by her overload and then even one had a broken neck. She was a literal killing machine. "I dunno, Garrus. I think EDI has both of us topped."

"I am pleased to assist," EDI purred.

Jack dropped her barrier as she realized the room was cleared and she shouted from the room. "Kahlee said she was sending out an SOS. I had no idea the queen of the girl scouts would show up." Jack turned to the biotics students and shouted out some instructions before jumping out the window to land gently on the ground in front of Shepard. She approached her with a smile and then hauled off and punched her in the face. Shepard had a second to be thankful she hadn't put any biotics behind the punch before Jack was lecturing her. "Dammit! How many times did I tell you not to trust Cerberus!"

"You're not telling me anything I haven't told myself, Jack," she said rubbing her chin. Even without biotics, the tiny girl packed a serious punch.

"Aww, you feel bad? Well shit, I bet that's a big comfort to all the people Cerberus has killed!"

"As charming as ever..." Garrus said sarcastically, coming to Shepard's aid and turning her head to get a look at the bruise forming on her jaw.

"Bite me, Garrus!" Jack spat. "Or better yet, bite her. Probably how she likes it." Garrus rumbled in his chest, knowing Jack couldn't hear it, but Shepard sure did. He knew very well that yes she had liked it when he bit her. He was mocking her. Damn him. "Okay. Right now all I care about is getting my guys out of here."

"Your guys?" Shepard asked, shrugging off Garrus' tender touch.

A soft snort left Jack as she turned to glance up at the teenagers shooting the shit and eating their energy bars to recharge their biotics while they waited. Her voice softened. "Yeah, I guess so."

Shepard had gotten to know Jack fairly well in her time on the Normandy and she smiled, proud of how the convicted criminal had softened into the person she was now. After how she'd been raised on Pragia by Cerberus, she would defend these biotics students with her life to protect them from that fate. "I can't think of anyone who could care about them more."

"Well, I had some free time while you were off playing hero. Alliance brass knew I helped you. They offered me this, and apparently the students responded well to my teaching style."

The last was said loud enough for the students to hear and one of the girls laughed out loud as the boy she'd saved from the Atlas shouted, "The psychotic biotic!"

"I will destroy you," the laughing girl said in a perfect imitation of Jack.

"Drink your juice, Rodriguez. You couldn't destroy wet tissue paper," Jack scolded with a smile.

"Cortez to extraction team," Shepard's comm buzzed. "The Cerberus cruiser's coming back."

"How long have we got?" Shepard asked.

"Two minutes tops, Commander. After that, there's no way we'll get past them," he sighed.

Shepard looked up at the students who were in no way ready to leave. "Get out of here and back to the Normandy. We'll find another way off the station."

"Roger that, Good luck ma'am," Steve said, his voice reluctant but unwilling to question a direct order.

Shepard changed channels. "Shepard to Sanders. The students are safe, but the shuttle's a no-go."

Jack turned and glared at her, but there was nothing to be done. Kahlee responded. "Understood. I might know another way off the station, but I need station-wide camera access. Can you disable the Cerberus security override? It's routed through Orion hall, so it should be nearby."

After Shepard found the laptop, Kahlee led her to the exit door override so they could head to the shuttle bay where they planned to escape in a Cerberus shuttle so the cruiser couldn't target them as they left. Shepard and her team took the lower level as Jack snuck the students through on the balconies. They got assistance from up top every now and then and Shepard could see the use of the students. In their brief talk after she'd opened the doors, Jack had privately told Shepard that they were not ready for the role they were training for in spite of her inspiring words. It gave Shepard a lot to ponder as they fought through the atrium toward the shuttle bay. They lost sight of the students and Jack after they got out of the atrium, but Shepard trusted her to keep them safe. They collected a couple more tech students on their way and sent them on to meet up with Jack while they continued through the lower levels. Shepard took out a Cerberus trooper in the final hallway before the shuttle bay and her heart skipped a beat as she saw the abandoned Atlas standing open for the taking.

She and Garrus tripped over each other in the race to claim the driver's seat. She regained her footing first and sprinted to climb inside while he crossed his arms. "You killed the last one," she shrugged as she closed the broken window down in front of her.

"I suppose that's fair, but the next one is mine," he insisted.

"Deal," she said with a gleeful grin as she powered up the systems.

Garrus and EDI ran ahead to clear her a path as she lumbered along in the heavy machine body. As she cleared the stairs, she glanced around and spotted Jack and the students protected by a large barrier dome at the far end of the room. Kahlee asked for a few minutes to get the shuttle prepped and Shepard happily obliged, blowing away every Cerberus troop that dared show their face.

All of her exhaustion melted away as she fiddled with the controls, showering the room with machine gun fire, loosing rockets at groups of Cerberus fighters and even spinning the powerful arms to smack away approaching enemies that tried to get on her back like she had with the first Atlas. She laughed joyously. "I haven't had this much fun since the Mako! Garrus, I know what I want for my birthday!"

He chuckled. "I'll put it on the list between back massages and grenade launcher."

"I _do_ miss my grenade launcher," she pouted. "Thanks for reminding me."

"My pleasure," he grinned.

"Quit screwing around!" Jack shouted and Shepard glanced up at her and saw she was pointing toward the stairway that Shepard had come in from. Shepard turned the Atlas and saw that another Atlas was lumbering up the stairs to join them. She planted the feet of her own Atlas and aimed her rocket launcher at the glass.

"Garrus get it's shields!" she shouted and he quickly snapped an overload at the creeping monstrosity. When the shields didn't come down, Shepard cursed and as she tried to figure out how to send an overload to it as well without damaging her own shields, EDI's overload got the job done. "Thanks, EDI," Shepard grinned as the AI scurried off to deal with more of the stray troops around the room. She fired off the primed rocket, smashing the glass and exposing the driver. Then she peppered him with machine gun fire from the opposite arm. His body fell with a smack onto the ground in front of the mech.

"Time to go!" Garrus shouted.

Shepard reluctantly opened the hatch and climbed out of the Atlas, giving it a loving pat before following her team out the doors to join the students. Most of them had loaded onto the shuttle, leaving Jack and them to escape. "Wait! Where's Rodriguez?" Jack said, panic lacing her voice.

The girl in question was running toward them having gotten separated outside the room. She was being chased by several Cerberus troops. "She needs covering fire!" Shepard shouted, trying to break the glass with the butt of her shotgun.

"She needs more than that!" Jack shouted, glowing blue. Shepard ducked out of the way as Jack threw all she had at the hardened glass, shattering the entire window. Shepard jumped out as the shocked Cerberus troops regained their footing after the massive wave of biotic energy knocked them back. She grabbed the teen by her arm and dragged her to her feet and fled for the shuttle. Jack spat at the Cerberus troops as they tried to fire on them through the barrier she'd thrown up to get them to to the shuttle. They hopped in and Kahlee shut the hatch and launched from the Academy.

"Joker, we flew out in a Cerberus shuttle, watch your fire," Shepard warned as they zipped out into space.

"Alright I've got you on sensors. Should be just a minute," he replied.

"Thank you, Commander," Kahlee said, gracing her with a pretty smile. "We'd have never gotten off that station if you hadn't come."

"F-forget that!" Jack stammered breathlessly. "We kicked some ass. Next place we dock, you're all getting inked. My treat." Kahlee cleared her throat, but Jack bullied on. "What d'you guys want? Ascension project logo? Glowing fist? Maybe a Unicorn for Rodriguez?" she teased.

"Screw you, ma'am," the girl said loudly with a wide smile.

"I can't believe we got them out alive. I was going to suggest they stick to support roles. But perhaps they're ready after all," Kahlee said with a sigh.

Jack shot Shepard a meaningful look and Shepard flicked her eyes around at the young innocent teens. "They're definitely ready, but the Alliance needs them in a support role," she said, taking the heat from Jack and blaming the Alliance.

"What?! We trained for artillery strikes!" The male who'd called Jack the psychotic biotic said angrily.

"We don't need another artillery unit," Shepard insisted. "We need stronger barriers for our front line squads."

"This is bullshit!" Rodriguez growled.

"Hey," Jack scolded. "If that's where they need us, that's where we go. Besides, I'm sure we'll get some shots in." She threw Shepard a grateful glance.

"Commander, we've got a visual on you now. Preparing to dock," Joker announced. "Hey Jack, now that your military are you gonna wear a uniform? Or are you just gonna get the officer's bars tattooed on?"

"Screw you, f-flight lieutenant..." Jack said as if that was not the word she was going to use. Shepard grinned as Joker giggled.

"Uh, what the hell was that?" he teased.

Kahlee looked up with a snicker. "Jack promised to watch her language in order to maintain the necessary professionalism we need from out teachers."

"What does she have a swear jar or something?" Joker taunted. "'Cause I'll bet if we emptied that thing we could afford another cruiser."

"Cover your ears kids," Jack said, cocking her hip. "Hey Joker, FUCK YOU!"

* * *

 

After they returned to the Normandy, Shepard took a moment to pour over her emails, another cup of strong coffee steaming beside her console. She'd had a chance to talk with Anderson over the vid comm and it had significantly brightened her day to see him, still alive, with her own two eyes. Most of her emails were from contacts of hers asking to meet on the Citadel. Aria T'Loak and Thane in particular piqued her interest. There was more intel on Cerberus as well. Shepard boiled with rage as she read about the occupation of a Prothean Dig site near the colony on Eden Prime. She jammed her finger down on the comms to the bridge. "Joker. Once Jack, Kahlee and the students take the shuttle to head to the Citadel, I want us at Eden Prime ASAP."

"Aye, Commander," Joker complied.

"What's happening on Eden Prime?" Garrus' low hum cascaded down her back as he stepped in her room and moved to stand behind her.

She leaned back in her chair, tilting her head to look at him upside down. She'd wondered when he'd show up. She'd actually been surprised the night before when she had gone to bed alone. "Hey," she said with a wide smile. He cocked his head and returned the expression. "Just Cerberus disrupting the colony there. Those poor people. First Saren and the Geth, now this." She gestured to her console, looking back at the email.

He placed his hands on her shoulders and began to gently massage the knots from her muscles. She sighed and closed her eyes, leaning back to rest the back of her head on his stomach. He was humming softly, the soothing noise nearly knocking her out right there. He was always able to help her sleep. She opened her eyes and sat forward, his hands still on her shoulders. When she tried to force herself to concentrate, he grunted and turned her chair around so she was facing him. "You're not getting out of telling me what's bothering you," he scolded, taking a knee in front of her.

She sighed, her hand finding it's way up to stroke his fringe. He purred, leaning in to the touch. His hands slid up her thighs and found her hips. He gripped her tightly and pulled her toward him, standing faster than she thought possible, pulling her up with him and pressing her body against his. He closed his eyes and touched his forehead to hers. "I missed you," she said softly as he slipped his hands up under her uniform shirt that she'd untucked as soon as she got to her cabin.

"Oh, you are good," he groaned as she slipped her fingers down between the plates under his fringe, caressing lightly over the sensitive skin. "Maybe... we can talk afterwards?"

"Mmmhmm," she agreed starting to back up and pull him with her. She guided him to her couch then pushed him down to sit and immediately straddled his hips. The position put her over top of him, their faces even as she sat on her knees. She leaned in and kissed his lips, the flexible hardness of them not as surprising as the last time. His mandibles tickled her cheeks, making her stomach flutter at the soft touch. She pulled away to look in his eyes and his visor got in the way. She clucked her tongue and lifted it off, twisting her body to lay it gently on the coffee table behind her. "There you are," she smiled when she turned back to him.

He grinned at her, his fingers running lazily up and down her thighs She'd been watching the last time when he'd undressed himself and she set to work, deftly finding each clasp and working them loose. He watched her work, her tongue between her lips as she concentrated. "You know, I could do that for you," he said with a short rumble in his chest. She shook her head, her hair falling from behind her ears as she looked down. He tucked the offending locks back again and sat back, allowing her to do as she pleased. "Your hair's gotten longer," he observed, as he tugged gently on the tips on her left.

She looked away from her work, meeting his gaze again. "I know how much you like to play in it," she teased. She dropped her hands and sighed. "I apparently need more practice."

He chuckled. "You might as well do your own because that is much more complicated than the towel from last time." The hum in his chest with her that close drove her just a little batty and she bit her lip.

She reluctantly climbed off him and they each removed their own clothes, then she straddled him again, noting that his lower plates had not opened all of the way yet. She pressed her body to him, reaching around and tucking her face between his neck and the rim of his cowl. With her hands gripping his sides, she nipped gently at the softer, leathery skin there. He hummed and she bit a little harder, drawing a pained groan from his mouth. He wrapped his arms around her waist and returned the favor, his sharper teeth nearly breaking skin as he nuzzled into her neck. Her body clenched, enjoying the attention. It had been a long time. She moaned, running her right hand down to slip inside the slowly parting plates that protected the prize inside. Her hand found her goal and he pulled away from her neck to look questioningly at her. She grinned and tightened her grip, squeezing lightly. "Not something you're used to?" she asked as he threw his head back and purred.

"Talons," he breathed as he grew in her palm.

"Uh huh," she smiled and slid off his lap to sit between his legs on the floor. "So I bet this will be another new experience." She licked his tip then slid her lips over him, drawing a hiss from his mouth.

"Spirits, yes, that is new." He chuckled as she worked him with her mouth.

She paid close attention to his subharmonics as his breathing quickened. When she felt he was close, she slowly drew her mouth away and he groaned in disappointment. She climbed back onto his lap and kissed him, slipping her tongue into his mouth while she guided him inside her. He moved his hands into her hair and tugged lightly as he returned her kiss, his long tongue melding with hers. Her hips ground into his and she felt him moving in sync with her, doubling the pleasure she felt as he glided effortlessly in and out over her sweet spot and then connected with her cervix as he slid deeper. "oh, god," she whimpered dropping her head so her hair fell over her face again.

His hands reached up again to push her hair away and lift her head to lock their eyes. "Stay with me," he rumbled, the echo of his subharmonics saying he was nearly as ready as she was.

She nodded and bit her lip and he pulled her face to his and kissed her. It was moments before his grip tightened and he spilled inside her, unnaturally warm just as he had before. She choked out her finishing cry as she bit down on his neck to muffle her scream. When the orgasm faded, she loosened her grip with her teeth and sighed, relaxing her muscles. He hissed then chuckled as their position put her weight down on him before he could pull out. She lifted back up, supporting herself by wrapping her arms around his neck and he adjusted her seat on his lap so she could settle back down. "You know, I've never been called a god before," he teased.

"Don't let it go to your head," she smirked, basking in the wonderful feeling of being back in his arms.

They sat in comfortable silence, as she traced lazy circles over his chest plates with her fingertips. She felt herself dozing off and he caught her hand with his as it slowly fell away. "Hey," he shook her gently.

"mm. mm," she groaned, wanting nothing more than to go to sleep.

He sighed and shifted underneath her. He slid his arms under her and lifted her to take her to the bed. He laid down behind her, pulling the comforter over them and huddling close to her back. She lifted her head to let him slip his arm underneath and then settled back down. The world grew hazy around her.

* * *

 

Even with Garrus at her back, she still found herself in the haunted forest that night. The dream woke her sometime early in the morning cycle. She extricated herself from his arms and tip toed across the room to the shower. She closed the door behind her so the noise of the water wouldn't wake him. Her shower was hot and she enjoyed it while she could. When she was clean, she pulled a new uniform from her dresser and slipped into it. Garrus still snored softly in her bed and she smiled.

She left him to sleep and went down to the mess. No one was around so she made herself a mug of coffee and sat down to enjoy the warm burst of caffeine. While she sipped her drink, she got a ping from her omnitool. She pulled up the message and smiled to see it was from Kaidan. As soon as they were done on Eden Prime, she was certain now that she would be hitting the Citadel before they went to meet with the diplomats. The other races would take some time to get to the meeting point and with the Normandy's advanced engines she had plenty of time to make the trip. Not to mention she needed to pick up some civvies. She sat back in her chair and after about a half hour, her coffee had gotten cold and she was dozing in the chair. She faintly heard the sound of the elevator hissing as someone got off. The echo of subharmonics woke her from her haze as he moved to the kitchen and poured her a fresh cup of coffee. He approached her with the mug and took her old one from her hands. She offered him a soft smile as he sat down beside her, depositing the cold coffee on the table. "Are you ready to talk about it yet?" he asked.

She sighed, tracing the rim of the mug with her middle finger, she noticed not only had her hair gotten long, but her nails were starting to peek up over the tips of her fingers. He took the fidgety hand in his and rubbed her knuckles gently with his taloned thumb. She remembered back to the day she'd first seen his hands. They'd been such a mystery and she'd wanted to touch them even then. She smiled, the expression bitter as she swallowed hot tears. "There was a boy," she cleared her throat and continued. "Back on Earth. He couldn't have been more than six or seven. I watched his shuttle get shot down by a Reaper while the Normandy escaped." Her hand tightened around the mug and she had to reign in her biotics as she nearly cracked the ceramic with the pressure. She set the mug down on the table, sloshing some coffee over the rim. The hot liquid burned her hand as it rolled over her skin. "Somehow, I'm still alive and he's not. It's not fair, Garrus. Every time I close my eyes, I see him."

At some point, the tears had begun to fall. He never attempted to brush them aside or even to comfort her. He simply let her cry it out, still rubbing gently over her knuckles. When she pulled her burnt hand from around the mug and sniffled, wiping away her own slowly receding tears, he said, "We both know that you can't save everyone. If you hadn't made it off Earth, not only would that boy have died, but there would have been nobody to lead this war effort and everyone else in the galaxy would have followed him."

She snorted noisily, and wiped her nose on her sleeve, earning a click of the mandibles from him. "Why do you have so much faith in me?" she asked, finally turning to look him in the eyes.

"We've known each other for almost 4 years now, Shepard. I've seen you at your most vulnerable and you were still a force to be reckoned with. You've _never_ let anyone tell you that something can't be done. Don't start now." His gaze never wavered as his eyes blazed with the passion of his words.

"Thank you," she said, reaching up and pulling his forehead to hers. "For believing in me."

He purred as they shared the intimate moment, even more precious than the time they'd spent coiled around each other.

* * *

 

They landed on Eden Prime, the warm sun peeking nervously through the ominous clouds overhead. The colony ahead was almost exactly how she remembered it when she Kaidan and Jenkins had landed there so many years ago. Eden Prime. The mission that started it all. It felt eerily quiet after Cortez took the shuttle back up to hover in orbit and await her call for extraction. She pulled her shotgun, the weight comforting in her hands as she moved toward the prefab units. "This was a beautiful colony once," Shepard mused as they moved through the ghost town.

"It survived Saren, it can survive this," Garrus assured her, close to her back his presence a comforting warmth.

"They rebuilt Mindoir," she said softly. "It wasn't the same."

"It never is," Garrus agreed.

She shook off her unease as they passed between some of the units. They came upon a wide open chasm and Shepard gaped at the amount of work that had been done to the site since the last time she was there. "Look at that. Bits of Prothean tech sticking out of the ground like an old bone."

Liara jogged up to her side excitedly, whipping out her omnitool to scan the massive monuments. Shepard smiled at the giddiness in her old friend as Garrus nudged her arm with his elbow. "So Liara, ever dug up... what do humans call it? A dinosaur?"

"No. Dinosaurs and other fossils would be paleontology. I am an archaeologist. I study artifacts left by sapient species. The two fields are completely different, and.... you were joking." Her face flushed lavender and Shepard let out a soft laugh.

"A bit," Garrus rumbled, the laughter hidden in his subvocals. "But at least you're catching on these days."

They moved away from the cliff and over to a lift that would take them down into the dig site. Liara stepped ahead of Shepard, her excitement getting the better of her. Shepard stepped aside and let the girl work. She brought the lift up and as it slowly rose to greet them, she read information off the nearby console. "Goddess, that doesn't seem possible." She stepped away from the console to hop onto the elevator before it even reached them, her omnitool already glowing. "It's not a Prothean artifact. It's... a Prothean."

Garrus hummed his curiosity. "Like the Collectors? Or those bodies we found back on Ilos?"

Shepard moved to kneel beside the pod next to Liara. It looked almost identical to the ones they'd seen on Ilos sticking out of the walls. Liara spoke with awe in her voice. "Like the bodies we found on Ilos, but this one is alive."

"You're right, that doesn't seem possible," Shepard said, her eyes widening at the concept.

"You saw Prothean stasis chambers in the archives on Ilos. The only reason those failed was lack of power. Cerberus found this in an underground bunker. It still has power." She turned her attention from her omnitool to look at Shepard with a gleeful smile. "He's been in stasis for the past 50,000 years, waiting for us. Think of what we could learn."

They still had time before Cerberus realized they were there, so Shepard smiled at her friend and indulged her excitement. "What can you tell me about the Protheans? The people... not the technology."

"Given your experience with the Prothean Cipher, you probably know as much about them as I do. The Prothean Empire spanned the known galaxy. They uplifted countless other species to help them join the galactic community."

"Galactic community? You think they had something like a council?" Garrus asked as Shepard stood and brushed off her knees.

"Yes! Exactly! Their cultural and artistic expression are actually quite close to those of the ancient Asari. And given their similar interest in helping other species, it's clear that they believed in inter-species cooperation."

"The way you describe them, they sound a _lot_ like the Asari," Shepard said with a smirk.

"I'm certain I'm coloring their culture with my own perceptions," Liara said with a small flush. "Whatever the Protheans were, finding one alive represents an incredible opportunity."

"Good thing we brought our Prothean expert," she patted Liara on the shoulder for encouragement.

"I hope I can help. If this single Prothean was sent into stasis, he could be the foremost scientist of his time... or perhaps the wisest counselor." She went back to scanning with her omnitool. "Hmm. Cerberus damaged the life pod when they excavated it. The life signs are unstable."

"Then let's get him out of there," Shepard suggested.

"No," Liara shook her head. "Breaking open the pod would kill him. We have to find the command signal that ends the stasis mode. We also have to figure out how to physically open the pod without doing more damage. Cerberus took over the labs nearby to research what they found at the dig site. That's likely our best bet."

Just as they set off across the bridge to get deeper into the colony, a Cerberus shuttle whizzed over head. "There they are," Garrus shouted moving to cover.

They fought off a few Cerberus troops and just when Shepard thought they were done, she stood from cover and turned to glance at her friends. Garrus reached out his hand but before he could open his mouth, she felt the bullet whiz through her shields and smack her in the shoulder blade. "Ah! Dammit!" She cried out, dropping to her knees to get back into cover. She hit her medigel dispenser as Garrus searched for the enemy who'd taken the shot. She leaned out around her cover to scan the area with her visor. Gritting her teeth, she spotted movement and called over their private channel. 1030, Big Guy... Take that fucker down."

She heard the boom of Garrus' high powered sniper rifle and the 'urk' of the sniper that had hit her as she fell under his bullet. "Clear," he announced after another quick scan of the area to be certain.

"The hell?!" Shepard shouted, pushing up off her ass and painstakingly standing. Garrus and Liara jogged over to her and Liara brought up her omnitool. "It's still in there," Shepard hissed as Garrus held her still for Liara to scan. "My shields slowed it down, but it was a high impact."

"Cerberus has upgraded their people," Garrus grumbled trying to undo her shoulder armor.

She shrugged him off. "We need to get this guy out of his pod before Cerberus figures out how."

"You've been shot," he growled.

"I know," she growled back. She turned her attention to Liara. "Can you biotic it out?"

Liara pursed her lips. "Shepard, you of all people know the intricacies of how biotics work. No, I cannot just 'biotic it out'."

"We should get you to Chakwas," Garrus insisted.

She shook her head. "No. There's not time. I'll be fine. I've got plenty of medigel. Come on."

Garrus rumbled his displeasure, but did not argue. Liara huffed, setting up her omnitool to monitor the bullet in Shepard's shoulder to be sure it didn't move around and threaten anything important. "Biotic it out," she grumbled sarcastically. "Really, Shepard."

Shepard shrugged with her good shoulder and smirked. "It was worth a shot."

"Let's just get the data we need and get off this rock," Garrus sighed, walking off with his subvocals humming angrily and his mandibles pulled tightly to his face.

They moved through the colony, hunting down the labs that contained the Prothean research. To the right of the bridge they found the data that they needed to physically open the pod hidden in a lab blocked by a ton of armed Cerberus troops and an Engineer that had set up a nasty turret that fired at the slightest movement. Shepard stood pressed up against the edge of the doorway of the unit they had passed through that led outside to the next building. She pulled up her omnitool and blinked a few times as her vision blurred. She pressed her medigel dispenser and ground her teeth in annoyance. "Shepard," Liara hissed. "Your readings... That bullet was..."

"Poisoned, I know," she agreed.

"Oh, You've got to be kidding," Garrus sighed.

"I'm fine," Shepard insisted. "Cyborg, remember?" She punched in the overload on her omnitool and reached around the doorway to take out the turret. The overload exploded the automated machine and took out the Engineer beside it. "Oh, two for one," she smiled.

Liara threw a singularity at two Guardian troops to lift them and drop the giant metal shields from their hands and Shepard reached around, hissing at the recoil as she hit them both with head shots from her pistol. Garrus sniped the remaining Centurion troops and then rushed over to Shepard. She held up a palm when he tried to fuss over her wound again. "You're still bleeding," he pointed out.

"I'm fine," she insisted. "Let's just get this over with... quickly."

They pushed on, getting into the lab where a giant screen was set up, reading data from a small shard that looked like a miniature beacon. Shepard pressed the button to bring up the readings and a short video played as if from a POV camera. It showed a battle between aliens that she assumed were Protheans and some Collectors. The Eden Prime in the vid was ancient, the Prothean architecture rising from the ground in all of it's glory. It was beautiful, even as the Reaper stalked through the streets, blasting its way through as they had on Earth. She watched as the Prothean she was seeing as knelt beside a damaged life pod and opened it with the press of a few buttons. He trembled in mourning over the loss of a third of their people, pressing his three fingered palm to the chest of the burned out shell of a man inside the pod. It was near the end of their cycle. She could tell from the acrid stench of the world around them. Why could she smell the air? This was a vid. She frowned, having seen the way to open the pod. "I think I can duplicate that," she sighed.

"You understood that?" Liara asked with amazement.

"You didn't?" Shepard asked, turning to face them.

Garrus' eyes narrowed and he said. "Shepard, your eyes are glowing a bit greener than usual."

She blinked away the burning in her eyes and frowned again. "Amazing," Liara said in awe. "The Cipher on Feros must have given you an understanding of Prothean technology. All I saw was static."

Shepard lifted her good shoulder in a shrug. "However it happened, I have the code. Let's go find out the signal to end the stasis."

Of course it was not that easy. They stumbled upon a sight that made Shepard's blood boil. A group of colonists, sitting on a couch in one of the prefab units had been gunned down where they sat. Their opened beers sat on the coffee table, the rings of sweat from the cans dripping across the table and pooling in the middle. The television hissed on the far wall, the signal cut. Shepard clenched her fists. "Gunned down while enjoying a beer and watching the game. This wasn't some lab. It was someone's home," she growled.

Garrus' hand rested on her good shoulder. "We didn't kill these people. And we'll take down the bastards who did." She spun and headed out the door, choking down angry tears. She welcomed the Cerberus troops waiting for her outside. She charged them with a shout and her biotics exploded full force in three of their faces. The troops flew back with the force, two of them slamming into the side of the unit and crumbling. The third attempted to get back up, but she grabbed him up in a biotic field and threw him up in the air and then used all she had to slam him back down on the ground. His body exploded with the impact, spraying blood and parts all over the battle field. To her left, an engineer scurried to set up a turret. She noticed Garrus throw an arm out to stop Liara from helping. Shepard tapped out her overload and threw it at the turret before it even opened out all of the way. The machine exploded just like before, thudding shrapnel into the Engineer's chest and knocking him dead. After a few shotgun pellets later, Shepard stood in the center of her self made destruction, panting heavily. 8 Cerberus troops laid dead in her wake. Garrus sauntered up to her. "Feel better?"

She nodded, reaching up to wipe blood splatter from her cheek. He clicked his mandibles. Liara approached them with a frown, not understanding the rage she had felt about the deaths of the colonists. Only Garrus could understand. She glanced at him seeing the compassion in his gaze as he studied her face. Before she tipped over, she reached out and gripped his bicep with her hand, closing her eyes and taking a moment to gather up the energy she had expended with the biotics. The poison from the bullet in her shoulder coursed through her veins, the adrenaline from the fight pushing the limits of her cybernetic healing abilities.

She must have voiced a complaint because he took her good arm in his hand to mirror her gesture and asked. "Did you eat breakfast, Shepard?" She bit her lip and shook her head. He sighed and dropped his hand from her arm to fiddle in a pouch at his belt. He pulled out a protein bar with a red stripe down the side indicating it was levo friendly. He held it out to her and shrugged at her questioning look. "I know you tend to forget breakfast."

Liara smiled sweetly at the exchange as Shepard tore open the wrapper and took a few bites from the possibly life saving, cardboard tasting ration bar. "You know me so well." She forced a smile. "Come on, let's get that signal and get the hell out of here."

The second lab was much the same as the last. Shepard watched as the Reapers tore apart a city. Protheans scurried about on the ground. The eyes she saw through argued with another Prothean about the imminent fall of their empire. Then he sent the other to his stasis pod. He called forth a VI that appeared to help. He asked the VI to broadcast the signal to all life pods. The signal appeared in front of the VI and Shepard pressed record on her omnitool. The vision faded and her eyes burned again. She deactivated her visor momentarily to rub the discomfort from her vision and swayed a bit. Garrus was there to support her with a gentle hand. Her head was pounding now and she was starting to get irritated. She thanked Garrus with a glance and pushed herself forward. Her shoulder throbbed and when she was forced to throw herself into cover after they passed through a greenhouse, she cried out in pain as the bullet shifted.

"Fuck me, goddammit!" She growled punching up her overload again to take down the two turrets that had been placed for maximum damage as they came back toward the bridge. The overload arched between both turrets, destroying one and taking down the shields on the other. "Don't you assholes have anything better to do!?" She shouted, hitting her medigel delivery system.

The medigel made her feel better, and she poked her head out around the doorway and took stock of the remaining enemies. The world started to get a bit more colorful and she grinned. Her skin buzzed and her hands shook, making her aim a little less precise. She heard her name being called and she struggled to focus on where the voice was coming from. When she finally found him, she grinned at Garrus and he cocked his head. She hit the medigel again, liking the warm tingling that blotted out the numerous medical pains she was suffering. "Spirits, Shepard. Are you high?" he asked as he scanned her with his visor.

"Maybe a little," she admitted, with a giggle.

He shook his head. "Wonderful," he muttered. "Just stay down, we'll do the heavy lifting."

"Like hell," she grunted, shaking her head and checking her thermal clip. She was almost out and she cursed. Instead of using her omnitool, she called her biotics.

"Shepard!" Liara scolded. "You're going to expend your reserves." Liara ducked as a bullet pinged off the desk she was crouched behind.

"Put the biotics down, sugar," Garrus shouted.

Shepard giggled again. "Did you just call me sugar?!"

He glanced around at her and frowned. "No, what the heck does that mean? Why would I call you..." he squinted, his brow plates pressing together as he struggled with his translator. "Did you say sucrose? Why the hell would I call you sucrose?"

She tossed a lazy throw out the door as she doubled over in laughter. "I think my translator had an issue with whatever word you called me," she howled. The biotics caressed over her target only pushing him aside and Garrus grumbled as he sniped the target down.

"Spirits," he whispered, exasperation in his tone. "That is the last time I try to give you a pet name."

"Clearly it was a bad idea," Liara said with a gentle consoling giggle.

"Sorry, Big Guy. It's okay, I still love you," she blurted and his gaze snapped to her. Her face flushed and she averted her eyes before he said anything. She focused as best she could, pulling an incinerate program up on her omnitool as her heart raced, her blood pressure buzzing in her ears.

His voice purred over their private channel and she pretended she didn't hear him. "We will discuss this later."

She took a deep breath, trying to swallow the dizzy bubbly feeling from the medigel. She somehow managed to make it through the battle and they regrouped by the bridge. Cerberus had retracted it and they hunted for another way across, Shepard's cheeks still an embarrassed pink. Garrus was strutting along behind her, quite pleased with himself as Liara cleared her throat and tried to act like she wasn't there. Shepard wished _she_ wasn't there at that particular moment. Had she really just told Garrus she loved him for the first time under the influence of medigel and in the heat of battle? _Smooth, Shepard._

She sighed and pushed ahead, climbing to the roof of a nearby prefab to cross back over to the lift where the life pod waited. She stepped up to it and activated the program to transmit the signal to the pod. Liara explained that it would take some time for the signal to run through it's cycle. Of course while they waited, Cerberus sent more troops to get under their skin. Shepard kept her mouth shut and her biotics in check to avoid any further conversation. In her state, lord knew what would pour out of her mouth. Cerberus threw all they had at them, including an Atlas. For once, she kept to herself, using her overload and shotgun to slowly whittle down the Atlas instead of doing anything rash. With all three of them firing on it, there was no room for it to move quickly enough to aim at any of them. It went down fast enough, and it was still satisfying when it stopped dead in its tracks, even if it didn't blow up. Shepard huffed her disappointment, but got to her feet and moved back over to the life pod. The console blinked its readiness and she knelt and entered the codes she'd seen in the vision.

The pod hissed open and lying inside was a very much alive Prothean. Shepard gaped as his presence overwhelmed her. She knew for sure that this was the one whose eyes she'd been seeing through. His skin was a soft aqua color from his cheeks down to his chin. The skin surrounding his eyes that trailed up into his carapace faded from the blue to a brown. Below his chin he had a patch of red much like she remembered on Thane. With his chin serving as the point, the shape of his head was conical. He had three sets of nostrils in place of any pointed nose. And his mouth had sharp creases in a Y shape that looked like they separated to open his mouth wider, though she had seen no such ability in the visions she'd experienced. Liara barked a warning. "It will be a few moments before he regains full awareness."

His chest rose and fell and his face screwed up in a frown as his four eyes blinked open out of sync. They were a bright yellowish gold color and each of them had horizontal dual pupils. He glanced around at his surroundings and then he spotted them standing over him gawping. Out of nowhere, he sat up and glowed green. The ancient biotics hit her in the chest, throwing her back and she landed hard on her bullet wound. She gritted her teeth, feeling the pain even through the overdose of medigel. "Shit," she cursed as he stumbled from his pod and made his way on wobbly legs toward the cliff face.

She rolled to her stomach and pushed herself back to her feet as the others recovered around her. "Careful, he's confused," Liara shouted as Shepard walked over to him slowly. "Remember for us it's been 50,000 years. For him it's been..."

Her words were drowned out as Shepard laid a palm on his shoulder to gently coax him onto their side. Instead of simply turning him around, she was dragged into his mind. She watched his final moments replay as the VI from the previous vision told him that he was to be the voice of the Protheans as the rest of his people would slowly die off in pods due to lack of power. He laid helplessly in his locked pod as it slowly cycled him into cryo sleep while the neutron purge went off outside the protective encasing. Shepard gasped at the heartache as she felt it like it was hers. She was wrenched back into the here and now as the Prothean fell to his hands and knees. She felt the sting of tears in her eyes as he whispered in perfect English. "How many others?"

"Just you," she whispered, catching her breath. He pushed up to sit on his knees, his back hunched as he stared out over the ruins of his civilization. "You can understand me?"

"Yes. Now that I have read your physiology, your nervous system. Enough to understand your language." he said, not moving. His voice was low but she picked up on some flanging that was not as pronounced as Garrus'. His accent was thick.

"So you were reading me while I was seeing..."

"Our last moments. Our failure." He stood slowly and his head still bowed in sadness.

She shook her head and moved to stand beside him in stead of behind. "Your people did everything they could. They never gave up. and I could use some of that commitment now."

He regarded her curiously his eyes blinking as Cortez interrupted over the comm. She placed her fingers to her ear so she could hear better and as Cortez spoke he turned to glare at Liara and Garrus. "Shepard, whatever you did got Cerberus interested."

The Prothean stepped away from her to look more closely at her companions. "Asari, human... Turian. I am surrounded by primitives."

"It's not safe here," Shepard said moving again to stand behind him. "Will you join us?"

"You fight the Reapers?" he asked craning his neck to glare at her over his shoulder.

"Yes," she responded, sharing some of his disgust after having lived his species' last few moments with him.

"Then we will see..." He turned to regard her again. Primitives he had called them. She held out her hand for him to shake but he simply looked down at it and then back at her face with a sneer and stalked off, somehow knowing where the shuttle was.

* * *

 

Their new ally barely spoke to any of them as they rode back silently to the Normandy. Liara fussed over Shepard's shoulder as Garrus studied her face. She looked haggard. The mission coupled with her newfound insomnia had him concerned. She was not at her best. Was that a trace of one of her facial scars cropping back up? He narrowed his eyes and thought about what she had said to him back on the battlefield. It brought a private smile to his face as a warm feeling bubbled up in his chest.

She was sitting with her elbows on her knees, her hands dangling idly between her legs, the picture of casual as she flinched and cursed at Liara for prodding at her wound. The fact that she had overdosed on medigel was in no way like her at all. She needed to get some sleep and to get back into a regular eating schedule. She seemed to be living off of coffee and adrenaline. When she got out of the med bay, they were going to have a long talk.

He sat back in his seat, leaning his head back and closed his eyes. He could feel the Prothean studying him and the attention was disconcerting. There had been a permanent sneer on his face since he'd agreed to get on the shuttle with them. Garrus couldn't shake the feeling that he was carving them up for meat in his head.

The Normandy was a buzz with the news that they were bringing back a living breathing Prothean. Almost as soon as they stepped off the shuttle, James was staring from his place near the workout room. "Liara, could you please get him settled," Shepard asked, her tone nearly begging.

"Of course," Liara cooed with understanding and led the Prothean toward the staircase up.

Shepard sighed softly and shuffled toward the elevator. He followed close behind, smelling the exhaustion and sadness wafting from her skin. Whatever she had experienced when she had touched the Prothean had drained a lot of the spunk of her overdose. She'd been frustratingly silent since her slip of the tongue, even pretending she didn't hear him over the private channel. He knew she heard him when her pheromones had spiked at the purr in his voice. Why was she clamming up, now?

He sighed as the elevator doors closed them in together and she hugged herself smelling of nerves. Did she think her feelings weren't returned? He made certain that his subvocals thrummed assurance as they rode up in silence. She was his mate in all but words as far as he was concerned. She practically ran from the elevator when they landed on the crew deck. She scurried to the med bay and his shoulders slumped as he made his way to the Main Battery. He locked himself in to worry and clean his armor.

* * *

 

Chakwas removed the bullet from her shoulder, bandaged it up and gave her an antibiotic. The poison scan came back negative, her adrenaline, medigel and cybernetics working together to cleanse her system. Chakwas scolded her about the overdose and then waved her off prescribing a large lunch.

Shepard grabbed a protein bar to fill in as she headed for her debrief with Hackett. She explained the situation and Hackett congratulated her for beating Cerberus to the punch. As she stuffed the protein bar in her mouth while waiting out the scanners, Liara contacted her. "Shepard, are you out of medical?"

"Of course," she scoffed, sighing as she guessed Liara needed something from her. Her shoulder was throbbing and all she wanted to do was curl up in her bed and try to take a nap. She'd been tempted to ask Chakwas for sedatives. "Is there a problem?"

"Could you meet me down in the port cargo hold? It's about our new guest..." she asked timidly.

"On my way," Shepard said, tossing Traynor a wave as she passed to get back on the elevator.

When she reached the cargo hold, there were about 8 Alliance crew members loitering around. Two of them held guns to the Prothean who was kneeling serenely on the floor, his eyes closed. Liara was standing with her arms crossed over her chest and scowling at the Alliance men with guns. "Shepard, I've tried to make the room more accommodating, but they're not letting me talk to him."

"Apologies, doctor. Contact protocol with a new species. 'assume hostility'. We had to dust off the regulations," One of the officers said.

Shepard glared at the man and pushed down his rifle. "But he's not new," Liara protested as the Prothean's eyes opened and he regarded everyone out of the tops of them, not lifting his head. "I've spent my life studying Protheans."

"At ease. I don't think our guest will be a problem," Shepard ordered, stepping closer as his eyes locked with hers. "Will he?"

The Prothean stood and glanced around the room again. "That depends on you," he said. Suddenly he was on her. His hands gripped her biceps. All of the officers raised their guns again and Shepard's muscles tensed. "I can sense fear in you. Anxiety and distress. The Reapers are winning."

He dropped her arms and she backed away a couple of steps. "What do you mean 'you sense'?" she asked, unsure how he was reading her as he did.

"All life provides clues for those who can read them." He turned away and began rubbing his hands together, dipping them in a pool of water that apparently Liara had brought in for him. "It is in your cells, your DNA. Experience is a biological marker."

As he washed her from his hands, she turned and glared at all of the officers, dismissing them with a wave of her hand. She trusted this alien. He hadn't harmed them yet. There was only one of him. What would be the point? "What exactly did I experience back on Eden Prime? That was a hell of a flashback."

"The battle left it's own mark in me. I communicated this to you. It can work both ways," He stared at her over his shoulder.

"Like your beacons?" Liara asked, stepping up to stand beside Shepard.

He pushed away from the water table. "Yes. Which..." He grabbed Shepard again, his damp hands tightening around her arms. All of the visions from the beacons came flooding back to her. Images she had finally scrubbed from her mind implanting themselves behind her eyes again like a nightmare. Blood and death and the Reapers. He backed away dropping her arms. "...You found one. You saw it all... Our destruction, our warnings... Why weren't they heeded?! Why didn't you prepare for the Reapers, human?" He said with rage and disgust, scolding her like a child. She supposed that is now he saw them. Primitives.

"It's 'Commander'," she corrected him, her own temper over her warnings going unheeded flaring. "And we did our best with what we knew. Your message wasn't exactly specific."

He scoffed. "Then communication is still primitive in this cycle."

"We pieced together what we could and used it to stop a Reaper invasion three years ago," she explained.

"Then the extinction was delayed?" he asked turning back to face her.

"Now we have your plans for the device," Liara said excitedly. "We're going to build it." She stepped to the console in the back of the room beside the water table and pulled up the blueprints they'd found in the archives.

"Device?" he asked with curiosity.

"The weapon your people were working on... I'd hoped you could tell us how to finish it," she explained.

He looked over the plans in awe then said almost sadly. "We never finished it. It was too late."

"Then I take it you don't know anything about the catalyst," Shepard concluded with a sigh.

"No," he confirmed, leaning his palms on the edges of the console. "I was a soldier, not a scientist. Skilled in one art. Killing."

"What was your mission?" Liara asked in wonder.

"Among my people, there were... avatars of many traits. Bravery, strength, cunning. A single exemplar for each." He said.

"Which are you?" Shepard asked sharply.

"The embodiment of vengeance. I am the anger of a dead people, demanding blood be spilled for the blood we lost," he grunted. "Only when the last Reaper has been destroyed will my purpose be fulfilled. I have no other reason to exist. Those who share my purpose become allies. Those who do not become casualties."

" _Nothing_ in our fight against the Reapers has been that cut and dried," Shepard barked.

"Because you still have hope that this war will end with your honor intact," he said with condescension.

"I do," she said proudly.

"Stand on the ashes of a trillion dead souls, and ask the ghosts if honor matters." Shepard looked away, the wind blown from her sails. His words touched her heart and put a knot in her stomach. How would she feel if humanity was in the place of his people? "This silence is your answer," he concluded.

Liara glided across the room and indicated a shard that looked like a miniature beacon. "We found this at the dig site. I assume to belongs to you."

He glanced at it hovering like a trophy in a tiny gravity well. "It is a memory shard."

"Could it help us with the device?" she asked softly.

"No. It contains only pain," he sighed, glancing away as if the sight of it hurt him. "But I will help you fight," he said stepping to stand by Shepard. "And the last thing the Reapers hear before they die will be the last voice of the Protheans sending them to their grave."

 _How very dramatic_. Shepard thought as Liara spoke again. "If you don't mind, I have a few more questions I'd like to ask."

"Here it comes," Shepard said crossing her arms and smirking. As Liara wrung her hands together.

"I have written over a dozen studies on your species. I've published in several journals."

The Prothean watched her pace and snorted from his six nostrils. "Amusing. Asari have finally mastered writing."

"I'm sorry?" she stopped in her tracks and sent a glare in his direction. Shepard covered her amusement by clearing her throat.

"Nevermind. What do you wish to know?" He clasped his hands behind his back and stood ready to answer.

Liara rambled on and on about her work. His culture, his abilities, him... The Prothean was less than enthusiastic to share anything personal and was very curt about his culture. Shepard leaned against the wall, her arms crossed as she listened to him destroy every insinuation that Liara had about the almighty Protheans. When Shepard noticed her face beginning to sag into horror, she pushed off the wall and interrupted. "Thank you for talking with us. I never imagined actually meeting a Prothean."

He nodded, a smirk slipping over his thin lips. "This has been... amusing."

"Oh?" Shepard asked, wondering how he might have treated them if he weren't the only one of his kind. She had the distinct feeling they would have become one of his 'subservient' races.

"To discover the most primitive races of my time now rule the galaxy. The Asari, the Humans, the Turians..." he grumbled.

"There's also the Salarians," Liara informed him.

His eyes widened. "The lizard people evolved?"

"I believe they're amphibian," she corrected, crossing her arms.

"They used to eat flies," he said with a shrug. That was finally enough for Liara. She turned and stalked off, with a backwards glare. Shepard watched her go before turning back to the Prothean. "Commander. You may count on me. I am known as Javik."

"Then welcome aboard the Normandy, Javik," she said in her best diplomatic voice then left him to settle in.

When she got in the elevator, she noticed just how tired she was. Her body ached and her stomach was digesting itself. She stopped reluctantly on the crew deck and headed for the mess hall. The kitchen was bustling, signaling that she was just in time for dinner. She grabbed a cup of coffee that seemed to always be on tap and fixed herself a sandwich. It was more than she could stomach at the moment and she sat down beside Steve to pick at it. The crew attempted conversation with her and she was amenable, but not overly friendly. Steve looked worried. The man must have felt like he owed her after she'd talked him down a few days go when he'd hit a rough patch. She'd caught him crying over a recording of a call between him and his deceased husband. He'd listened to Robert get taken by the Collectors on Ferris Fields. He'd promised he'd move on, but he wasn't sure he'd kept the promise that was his husband's final wish. _You're not alone. I'm here for you Steve, whenever you need me._ She intended to keep her word. Cortez was a good man.

When she'd swallowed half of the sandwich, the rest turned her stomach and she slid the plate away. James was on his second plate of Spaghetti and watching him eat was no fun thing either. Her gut twisted up in dread over the words Javik had said to her. _The Reapers are winning_. She excused herself and headed for her room. Her lids were heavy. Joker limped off the elevator as the doors opened, EDI not far behind. "Oh hey," Shepard said with a yawn. "When you're finished with dinner, I'd like to head back to the Citadel."

EDI strolled by, her hips swinging. "Of course, Shepard."

"Uh, yeah, sure thing." Joker, said watching the robot body walk away.

Shepard smirked and crossed her arms. "Do you even know what I just said?"

He flicked his gaze to her and grinned in return. "Not a word."

"It's a good thing your copilot can multitask then," she said with a chuckle patting him on the back as she stepped into the elevator and pressed the button for her cabin. Before the doors closed, Garrus slipped in smoothly, stopping by her side. "Going up?" she asked with a small smile.

He reached around her as the doors closed between them and the rest of the world. His chest hummed, vibrating her skin and she sighed as he pushed against her to press the button for her cabin again. "I go where you need me." They rode up, his chin resting gently on her head, his mandibles playfully mussing her hair and his arms wrapped around her waist. Her palms were suddenly sweaty. She had forgotten all about what she'd blurted out on the battlefield until he was standing beside her. Her heart raced and she knew he could hear it. He remained silent until they were safely in her cabin, the door closed and locked behind them. She opened her mouth to say something... anything, but he silenced her by pressing his forehead to hers. "You don't need to say anything." She melted against him in relief. She didn't think she could have that conversation. Not here, not tonight. She wasn't thinking straight. She was just too tired. "Did you eat?"

"Sort of...?" she said coyly. "I had a protein bar after I got out of medical and then a few minutes ago, I had about half a sandwich." He pulled away from her and lifted her chin to get a better look at her face. When his expression flipped to concern, she sighed. "I'm so tired I'm nauseous."

He regarded her for a few more moments then graced her with a half smile and knuckled her chin playfully. He tossed his head to the bed. "Go get some sleep then," he suggested.

"Could you maybe talk to me? Like you did before... I miss your voice sometimes," she admitted with a shrug.

"Anything for you," he said, his smile spreading. "Go on," he shoved her playfully toward the bed. She pulled off her shirt and pants so she could sleep comfortably. She was looking forward to going to the Citadel and doing some shopping. She slipped between the sheets and patted his side of the bed. He laid down next to her and she snuggled in close to him so she could feel his voice vibrating down her spine as he spoke. He took a moment to gently stroke a talon across her skin around the edges of the bandage. Then he softly kissed the back of her neck, his mandibles tickling her skin as he slid his arm under her head. "Good night, Shepard."

"Thank you. For being you," she sighed, closing her eyes to chase away the burning. He mumbled nonsense in her ear softly until his voice lulled her to sleep.

* * *

 

She managed to sleep until at least 5 am which was a new record for her in recent days. She glanced up at the ceiling, hating the churning in her stomach that the stars zipping by in the skylight still caused. Garrus was up already, but he hadn't left the cabin, in case she needed him. He was sitting on her couch, his feet propped up on the coffee table, reading a book on a datapad, a cup of Kava in his opposite hand. As soon as she stirred, he looked up and smiled at her. "Good morning. I got you a surprise."

She pushed herself up to a sitting position, the sheets pooling in her lap. She folded herself in half, stretching a stiffness out of her back then sat up to frown. "And it's not even my birthday yet."

"Well, it's no Atlas mech, but something else you seem to need much more these days," he said dropping his feet and setting the datapad down on the table. He stood and made his way toward her desk alcove. A small noise indicated a button being clicked and within moments, she smelled fresh coffee brewing.

She stood and craned her neck to look through the glass that was obstructed by her model ships. He had gotten her a personal coffee machine. He looked rather pleased with himself as she ran up to hug him. "How did you...?"

He held up a hand. "Not on my own, mind you. I had Steve pull a few strings... Well actually, I asked him to hunt one down in all of those crates in the shuttle bay. He also found something else you might be happy to see.

He stepped aside to reveal an article of clothing draped over the back of her desk chair. "My N7 hoodie!" She said excitedly, grabbing up the familiar piece of home and hugging it to her to inhale the scent. She pulled it on over her bra and zipped it up, reveling in the softness of the fuzzy fabric against her skin.

"Unfortunately I can't take credit for that one, but the coffee pot was my idea, so I led him to it," he joked.

She petted his mandible and tugged him closer so she could plant a kiss on his lips. "You're the best."

 


	30. Back to the Citadel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard has some business on the Citadel before the summit meeting.

In just a couple of days, they made it to the Citadel. When they docked, she immediately called a cab to head to the hospital. She glanced around the lobby, looking for the distinct green skin of a Drell. Thane was standing in the simulated sun that cascaded in the large floor to ceiling windows of the hospital. He was practicing some punches and short kicks in the small space, but he looked content. She approached him quietly, but he still turned to face her when she got close enough. She offered up a smile which he returned warmly. "How'd you know I was here?" she asked.

He bowed his head lightly. "I smelled your... blood? Are you injured?"

She shrugged. "I was shot a few days ago. Cerberus. Poison bullet."

"I see... When I heard Earth was under attack, I tried to call. I never got through," he said with sympathy the usual raspiness in his voice a bit thicker.

"It's good to see you staying in shape," she said wondering how his condition was treating him.

"My disease kills slowly. With enough care and a healthy lifestyle, it can be delayed for a few years," he explained. He then smiled sheepishly. "Of course, my allotted time has come and gone. Now I exercise because it pleases me. What are you doing here, Siha?"

"Visiting a friend. Kaidan. He got hurt protecting me," she said softly.

"The human biotic in intensive care?" He coughed lightly into his fist and excused himself with a nod. "I saw the marks of an implant."

"Yeah," she nodded.

"We have spoken. He seems an honorable sort. Your enemies may try to finish him off here, I will look out for him."

She patted his shoulder and smiled warmly. "I appreciate it, Thane."

"I am near the end of my life. It is a good time to be generous," he said with another light bow of his head. "Kepral's syndrome has put most of my other plans on hold." He moved to sit in a nearby chair that looked out the large windows.

She took the seat next to him and sat back crossing her legs to enjoy the view. "I'm back on the Normandy on an important mission. Sure could use you."

"I... would not be as I was before. I need daily medical attention," he sighed sadly. "And if I know you, you will want to fight the Reapers in some way. You need the best at your side and I am not at mine."

She dropped the subject, understanding it was something he was disappointed in. Someone who had lived a life like his deserved to go out fighting, not in a hospital bed. "Do you know how much time you have left?"

"I've been to several doctors. My favorite gave me 3 months to live... nine months ago. It's freeing to find no requirements placed on me. No responsibilities, no fears. It is a good end to a life." In spite of the words, his voice was slightly bitter.

"Are you in a lot of pain?" she asked, hoping the answer was no.

"At times. The oxygen transfer proteins don't form correctly. Your human equivalent would be hemoglobin. As a result, my blood is low in oxygen. No matter how much I breathe in, I get tingling, numbness... and that is the best of it. As for my brain, I cannot track the damage. I just experience dizziness from time to time."

They sat quietly for a time, like they had on the Normandy many nights. It was saddening to see her friend nearing the end of his life. He truly was a good person in spite of his previous job description. "I wish the best for you, Thane," she said finally, taking his hand in hers and squeezing it.

"And I for you," he smiled and lifted her hand to lightly kiss her knuckles. "Do not grieve for me. I have good doctors. My son visits regularly. Perhaps we will keep up via the extranet now that you are free. Until we meet again, Siha."

She left him with a heavy heart and found her way to Kaidan's room. He'd informed her that Udina had offered him a SPECTRE position. She wondered if he'd accepted. She was excited to see him again, awake, with her own two eyes.

When she stepped into the room, the Councilor in question was badgering Kaidan. Kaidan's response that she caught was, "You'll have it soon councilor. I promise."

"I'll look forward to it," Udina said turning away with a sour look on his face. "Shepard," he addressed her as he left.

"Udina," she responded with equal enmity. When the door shut, she turned her attention to her old friend. "Hey."

"Shepard, hey. You just missed snack time." He grunted and smirked. "Actually that's probably a good thing." He was being civil so far and it made her feel a little better. The bruises on his face were fading slightly and he no longer looked like a wreck of a person. "Thanks for coming."

"No problem." She stood next to his bed and pulled a nearby stool up to sit down. "What'd Udina want? Still thinking about the SPECTRE position?"

"Well, its a big honor. A _huge_ responsibility... I just need to be sure."

"I got you this," she smirked pulling the bottle of whiskey she'd purchased for him out of her large hoodie pocket.

"Wow, thanks, Shepard," he said taking the bottle and glancing at the label. "That's really great."

"Just a little pick me up," she said nudging his shoulder.

"Maybe when I'm out, we can crack it open and celebrate," he offered. "I am _so_ ready to get out of here, Shepard. You can't tell, but I am tied to this bed by medical red tape. I mean doc, doc says I'm good to go, but then she always finds just one more test to run."

"You doing okay?" she asked, genuinely concerned.

"My implant got a little... rattled? So doc just wants me to keep the biotics offline for a bit. It's really no big deal." He sighed.

"Need me to break you out?" she offered, knowing her own distaste for hospitals.

He chuckled. "I'll let you know."

"I'm glad you asked me to come. It's good to see you're going to be okay," she said, clenching her fists so she didn't give any wrong signals.

"Thanks," he sighed again.

"You almost died on my watch. It was horrible to see," she admitted, shuddering as the memory of the bot gripping his helmet and slamming him over and over into the side of the shuttle flooded her mind.

"I want you to be straight with me then," he said making her stomach sink. "So I just wanna make sure... after Mars, after Horizon... You and me, we're good?"

She chose her words carefully. "We've been through hell together, had each other's backs. That kind of bond is hard to break."

His lips pursed like she was being dense as she tried to dance around the question. "But no, not just that. You were my Commander, sure, but you listened, too. And when I told you about how Rahna broke my heart, you didn't judge me. You knew I needed that. We went through Ash's death together."

"Yeah, we did," she was feeling like a jerk right about then.

"So what'dya say?" He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Are we good?"

"We're good," she insisted. She might be with Garrus now, but she didn't want to lose her friend. Kaidan was important to her, even if they weren't together anymore. "It was great to have you back on the Normandy."

"Thanks," he said. His tone and body language said he wasn't finished with her.

She nudged him. "What's going on? Is there something else?"

"Yeah... maybe..." he shrugged another deep sigh escaping his throat. If he didn't stop, he was going to hyperventilate. "Was there something between you and Garrus?"

Her heart stopped for a moment. How had he found out? She should have been the one to tell him. "Kaidan," she stammered. "I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you." She rested her elbows on the side of his bed and buried her face in frustration. "We were so far apart, physically. And after our fight on Horizon..." She shook her head, lifting it to look in his brown eyes. Her hands dropped to rest, still on the bed.

"Yeah, I'll own that," he admitted. "Man... seeing you alive sent me spinning, and I handled it badly. I'm sorry, Shepard. I just want you to know... for me," he grunted softly, as if he tried to chuckle, but it never quite formed properly. "There is no one else and... I still care." He reached down and took her hand and squeezed it.

She pulled hers away gently and rested them in her lap, clearing her throat. "Feel like we've cleared the air?"

He took the hint as she pulled away, resting his head back on the pillow. "Yeah, You know. I'm not sure that I've been wrong about Cerberus... but I've been wrong about you. I should let you get back to the Normandy. Wish I could come with you."

She smiled, genuinely glad that he wasn't taking her relationship with Garrus personally. "Take care of yourself, Kaidan. We need you at a hundred percent."

"Will do. Thanks for coming," he said with a genuine smile of his own.

* * *

 

Shepard left the hospital feeling much better. Since leaving Earth, she'd been faced with the possibility of Anderson and Kaidan dying, Garrus being MIA and Cerberus getting their hands on the only thing they had going for them in this war. Miraculously, each of those troubles had been overcome with relative ease. And now she knew where she stood with Kaidan as well.

She headed in a cab to Purgatory to see Aria. When the self proclaimed Queen of Omega was on the Citadel requesting an audience, you attended. Shepard walked in on a very annoyed Aria dealing with an immigration officer. She called the Asari councilor and the councilor passed her and her people through the hours of paperwork and bureaucracy in seconds. The immigration officer stalked off with a dismissive wave. "I guess there's one rule on the Citadel," Shepard said with a smirk as she sat down on the opposite end of the couch.

"It appears so," Aria said with a smooth cockiness to her voice.

They discussed why Aria had called her there. Apparently Omega had been taken from her by Cerberus, the situation 'for another time'. Right now, she was concerned with the various merc groups that were getting frisky without her ruling over them. She instructed Shepard all over the Citadel to meet with the three leaders and deal with their issues so she could regain her umbrella of rulership and kick them back in line. In return she offered their troops as fodder for the war effort. Shepard was willing to work with anyone if it meant more help against the Reapers. With the details settled and a few new navpoints on her omnitool, Shepard left Aria to seethe in her 'bureaucratic hellhole'.

A few tables away she spotted Jack a drink in one hand and a datapad in the other. She approached the biotic with a smile and dropped into the seat across from her. "Hey, Shepard. You look like shit."

"Thanks," she snorted. Jack ordered her a drink and they chatted for a bit. Jack was there on shore leave while still setting up patrol routes for her kids. Shepard convinced her to let loose for a bit and relax, dragging her onto the dance floor to entertain her friend with her terrible dancing. Shepard had never been one that was graceful on the dance floor. Everyone knew it, having seen her try to dance the last time they had all been out together before the Collector base. Jack simply chuckled and danced beside her like she didn't have a care in the world.

Down in the lower level of the bar, she spotted James having a drink beside a few uniformed Alliance soldiers. "Hey, Commander." He said turning away from the bar when she approached him. "Nice to see you down here in the dirt with us grunts."

"You think I don't like getting dirty?" she asked, crossing her arms and cocking her hip.

"Whoaho now," he said holding up his hands in placation. "Come on... I didn't mean anything by it, Lola."

"Uh huh, what _did_ you mean then?" she asked teasingly. Watching James squirm as he tried to figure her out was her new favorite past time.

"See those marines over there?" he said indicating the soldiers he'd been drinking with.

"Yeah?" She glanced over at the soldiers who were suspiciously looking anxious since she'd appeared.

"They've been buying me drinks all night. You know why? Same reason they got all quiet and serious when you walked in..."

"You don't seem intimidated by me in the least," she pointed out. "In fact you could use a little more deference." Her tone was still teasing.

"Ha sure," he shrugged. "But I've fought with you. I've seen you in action. Don't get me wrong, you're good. Probably one of the best."

"Probably?" she asked, mildly insulted.

"And you fill out a uniform like nobody's business," he said, looking her up and down then shrugging. "Just saying... But I know you're human, just like me."

"But not them?" she sighed waving a hand in the direction of the soldiers. This was a problem she dealt with every time she took on a new crew. Getting them to feel like friends and not underlings was a struggle.

"Nope." he adjusted his belt, dancing in place. "Hell, I still remember the day they made you the first human SPECTRE. I watched it on the vids just like all of them, but to them, you're still larger than life."

"I've seen a hell of a lot, but I'm still just a soldier. I'm still one of them," she insisted.

"Sure," he agreed. "But they don't know you. They just know what they've been told." He paused, reading her mood. "Listen... You want them to see you're one of us right?"

"Maybe..." she said, concerned about the glint in his eye.

"Then buy 'em a round," he shrugged.

She smirked. "I like the way you think, Lieutenant."

He grinned and cupped his hand to his mouth to call out over the thumping club music. "Compadres! Hey!" The soldiers turned to look at them, curiosity mixed with anxiety. "The Commander would like you to have a drink. On her..." He paused and cocked his head to wink at her. "So here's to us!" He pounded his one fist into his opposite palm, bouncing in place again.

The soldiers grinned as they approached then saluted. One of the men shouted. "Who's like us?!"

Shepard remembered the salute from back in her days as a private. She straightened her stance and returned the salute. "Damn few. And they're all dead."

The soldiers approached, all the anxiety gone from their faces. The male who'd saluted shook her hand. "It's an honor to meet you, Commander."

"Thanks," she scoffed. "But we're all in this together. Every one of us has a part to play."

"True enough," one of the women nodded. "Cheers," she held up the fresh drink she'd been handed and Shepard took hers from James.

"Cheers," Their glasses clinked together and Shepard downed the dark whiskey, enjoying the warmth as it slipped down her throat.

The other soldiers went back to their table to resume their free time and James nudged her. "Not bad, Lola. I was hoping you'd know that one."

She snorted. "Yeah, thanks for the warning."

"Thanks for the drink," he tipped his glass and turned around to lean on the bar. "I'm just gonna hang here for a while."

She left him to it and left the bar. The light outside was blinding. Leaving Purgatory during the day cycle seemed like a bad idea. She shuffled over to hail a cab and took a trip to the Presidium. She hit up the Embassies to speak with Bailey about releasing the leader of the local Eclipse mercs as Aria had requested. Bailey refused until Shepard got a look at the 'psychopath' for herself. He gave her a nav point in the commons to a C-Sec office where she could talk to the Asari in her cell. Shepard thanked him and left his office. She was greeted outside the SPECTRE offices by a fellow SPECTRE. A Salarian named Jondam Bau informed her he had information that indicated that some high level representatives in the Hanar government were indoctrinated. He said he got his information from Kasumi. Genuinely interested, Shepard agreed to help him in his investigation. When she went into the supposedly secure SPECTRE offices, Kasumi was inside already, hiding under her tactical cloak. It was good to see the tiny thief... in a manner of speaking. She still wore her hood that obscured her features. She offered to tag along and help her and Bau, even though the Salarian was looking to arrest her. She slipped back under her tactical cloak and followed Shepard to look into the situation. While she was there, Shepard found out what had happened to Ken and Gabby and put in a release order for them to return to the Alliance and to the Normandy. Between the two of them and Adams, the Normandy would be in top shape. Now only if she could find out what happened to Tali.

While scrolling aimlessly through the requisitions shop, she came across the most beautiful sniper rifle she had ever laid eyes on. The thing was top of the line and had more mod slots than she knew possible. It barely weighed anything and she smiled. The price was astronomical, 250,000 credits, but she knew the Alliance would pay. She put in the order and congratulated herself on finding something nice to give Garrus to replace his old beat up rifle.

She left the SPECTRE offices to look into the Hanar issue and settled the problem rather easily by hitting up a few consoles across the Citadel for information. Kasumi faked her death in the end to get Bau off her back and Shepard convinced her to go work for Hackett on the Prothean device which they had dubbed Project Crucible. Another issue solved and more numbers for Traynor to add to their war table calculations. Shepard headed to the Commons where Liara gave her a contact to speak to that would lead her to some more mercinaries for hire, then she settled a few more issues that Aria's request had brought to light. She made a deal for the Blood Pack, saved a familiar face by making a deal to get C-Sec some better weapons for defense so he would focus on that instead of disrupting Blue Suns dealings, and spoke to the Eclipse leader. She agreed with Bailey. The woman was insane. Instead of releasing her, she convinced her second in command (a very level headed Salarian) to strike up the deal with Aria instead. With all of the mercs on her side, Shepard felt accomplished.

Her travels had brought her to the docking bay where the Citadel had set up a makeshift refugee camp. It consisted mostly of human colonists, a few scattered Batarians and the Turians limping in from Palaven. She hugged herself as she glanced around at the sadness that the Reapers were dealing out in the galaxy. She'd passed by a memorial wall that the refugees had set up just past the entrance scanners. Mourners were congregated around it, weeping and offering support to each other. She would be going there herself to pay respects, even if she had nothing to place up there herself. Not yet. She was wandering through the stacked cargo containers that were serving as shelters and medical facilities when she heard Garrus. He was talking to a C-Sec agent about rations that had been promised to the incoming Turian refugees. He dropped Bailey's name and the C-Sec officer scurried off to get the situation sorted out. He turned as she approached, probably smelling her. How he could do that amongst the stench of crowded bodies and medigel she had no clue, but he smiled when he saw her. "Shepard."

"What's happening?" she asked him. Glancing around at the wounded Turians all around them.

"We convinced the council to accept our wounded. Nowhere else to go," he explained.

"How bad is it?"

"More dead than injured," he said with a sigh. "Eighty-Five percent killed in action. We'll need a morgue soon. Not a lot of flesh wounds when you're fighting Reapers."

"Casualties are _that_ high?" she asked, her anger flaring in sympathy for his people and her fear for the people fighting on Earth setting her heart racing.

"Our front lines are being wiped out whole platoons at a time. A single Reaper can destroy nine or ten of them in a single attack." His voice was hollow.

She looked again at all of the wounded scattered around the place on makeshift cots stained with the blood of those who'd come before them and not been so lucky. The injured moaned in agony and she felt tears burning her eyes. "That's not war. It's slaughter."

"They're called Reapers for a reason and these guys found out why."

"Do what you can for them," she said, knowing he would even if she said so or not. It just felt right to lend her support.

"A few of them might get back on their feet, but the rest... Sympathy is about all we can offer." He sighed, his eyes were distant as if he were looking past everything there. She knew exactly what he was worrying about.

"Any sign of your family?" she asked softly.

"Not yet, but I keep hoping," he said, his subvocals flaring in a gentle worried keen. He cleared his throat and the sound was gone. Her heart clenched as she watched him cover up his pain and bury it deep. "What about you? I'm starting to see some wear and tear."

She had noticed the appearance of a thin line of orange caressing against her jaw. She rubbed at it, feeling it was slightly thinner than it had looked that morning when she'd seen it in the mirror, but he had noticed it all the same. "I won't lie, it's been rough," she sighed thinking back to the awkward conversation with Kaidan paired with everything she'd done in her few hours on the Citadel.

"Well, don't forget to come up for air," he said with a fluttering of his mandibles that never quite turned into a smile. "And not just because these people need you. Because _I_ need you."

She gratefully accepted the touch of his hand on her shoulder, wishing it was appropriate to pull him close and comfort him about his family with a touch of their foreheads. "You say such things, Vakarian." she sighed. "I'm heading up to the commons to do some shopping. Would you like to come along?"

He glanced around at the suffering around him then shook his head. "I think I'll stay here for a bit longer."

She understood. "Of course Big Guy. I'll see you back on the Normandy. We shove off at 0600."

She picked herself up a few sets of t shirts and cargo pants and bought a new habit trail for Ferguson. He was getting quite upset at being confined to a bowl. She picked out a few fish to replace her absent others and then headed back to the Normandy dock. There waiting for her was Miranda. A sight for sore eyes, she informed Shepard that she was on the run from several Cerberus assassins because the Illusive Man was more than a little miffed that she had taken Shepard's side in her great exodus. Shepard offered her amnesty on board the Normandy, but her offer was refused because Miranda was working on something having to do with her sister. Shepard offered to help and Miranda again declined with a sweet smile, saying Shepard had enough on her plate. They parted ways, Shepard gathering the woman in a hug which she stiffened at, but eventually gave a quick pat on the back to get away from.

She was heading back to get into the airlock when she spotted Steve leaning casually on the rail overlooking the crowded airspace. She approached him and leaned to join him. "Finally got off the Normandy, huh?" she asked nudging her shoulder into his.

"Yeah, just taking your advice," he said with a sigh. "Even with the chaos of all of the refugees, seeing so many ships in flight. It's comforting. Gets me thinking." He paused and they watched the ships fly over head, some in a rush, others limping. "Hey, a Turian frigate. I think that's the PFS Havinclaw."

"What's one Turian warship doing at the Citadel?" she wondered.

"Looking for dry dock I'll bet. She's seen battle. Look at the waver in her drive core emissions." The lights at the back of the massive ship were indeed flickering lightly. "Alone, limping, looking for a haven. Maybe it would have been better to just go down fighting like their families back home." he said, his face screwing up with his private pain.

"Are you talking about the Turians or yourself?" she asked knowingly.

"I should have been there, with Robert," he confessed after a small pause. His adams apple lifted and fell as he swallowed tears.

"But you weren't. You're alive and that's a good thing," she said with a pat to his forearm.

"Maybe so," he said, his tone not really agreeing with her.

"The lives of future generations rest on those Turians' shoulders. On our shoulders. Nobody's giving up. Not those Turians. Not me. Not you." She watched as several more ships flew by.

"If anyone can pull this all together..." he began, his words sounding like an appeasement.

She cut him off, noticing and Alliance vessel zip by. "Is that an Alliance cruiser? What's it doing here?" Every word she said gave him another thing to think about and she knew it. To pull Steve out of his sorrow, she would use any metaphor she could think of.

"That's the SSV London," he identified the ship. She already knew the ship, but the age and status of the ship was important for him to figure out on his own. "Decommissioned years ago. Look, no guns." She nodded with a telling smile. "Refugees must have salvaged her from a ship yard. Geneva-class cruisers always had Eezo cores like granite."

"People find a way to survive," she said pointedly.

"Do whatever it takes to see another day?" he asked, catching on to what she was trying to tell him. He sighed deeply, his head drooping and he shook it in self deprecation. "I've got to let go. For real this time.... The refugees here have put up a memorial wall. They leave mementos of lost loved ones. I was thinking maybe..."

"What's stopping you?" she asked.

"Nothing," he said quickly then amended. "I mean... Let me think about it."

She left him with an encouraging pat and returned to the Normandy.

* * *

 

Shepard gathered her purchases from the cargo bay, admiring Garrus' gift in person. It truly was an exceptional weapon. She took everything up to her cabin, laid the rifle out on her coffee table, and put away her clothes. There was a timid knock on her door and she frowned, wondering who might be visiting her. "Come in," she offered and the door slid open. "EDI?" she said in surprise.

The AI nodded. "Hello, Shepard."

Shepard studied the mech as she stood a little less confidently than usual while the doorway closed behind her. Her eyes were unfocused and she fidgeted. The new body made her so very human. "You look like you're gathering data," she pointed out, recognizing the far off gaze.

"That is a safe assumption," she agreed with a shrug.

"Anything big and world shaking?" Shepard asked with a grin, offering a seat to EDI as she sat down herself on the couch. EDI followed her down into the living area, but did not sit. Shepard crossed her arms and legs. "Man's inhumanity to man? Does objective reality actually exist? That sort of thing?"

"I was running scenarios in my head to analyze Jeff's behavior..." She paused and wrung her hands together. "I believe he has a strong affectionate attachment to me, but he has not stated it to anyone yet." Shepard nearly laughed out loud. EDI was worried about Joker's crush on her. "Shepard, you have first hand sexual experience. How do you know when someone is romantically invested?"

Shepard's jaw hit the floor. EDI was asking for her advice about sex. She hesitated, trying to choose her words carefully. "They'll usually show signs they can't stop thinking about you. You know, asking you out, giving you presents, maybe playing music..."

EDI cocked her head. "I lack material wants other than hardware and software upgrades and my core programming does not assign value to music." She sat daintily on the edge of the couch, her body turned to give Shepard her full attention. "Perhaps we could discuss how to provoke Jeff into an emotional commitment." So Joker wasn't the only one with a crush. Shepard smiled.

"That's... not how to think of it. It's got to be natural. You need chemistry." she said without thinking.

"I see. There are a number of pharmaceuticals I could inject to simulate the desired emotional state..." EDI suggested.

Shepard chuckled and patted the AI's forearm like she would an actual person. "No, I mean relax a little. Do something you both like. Something simple. For example, you both like humor."

"Correct," she agreed after studying the hand Shepard still had on her arm. "I will see if there are comedic entertainment shows being presented on the Citadel." She paused, her eyes going distant again as she scanned the Citadel schedules. "Do you think he would like 'The man who hung himself'? It appears to be about an amorous plastic surgeon."

"EDI," Shepard patted her arm again and then removed her hand. "The important thing is to have a good time, wherever you go. And if you're having fun, he probably will too."

"Then the outcome is an unknown quantity, but you are saying I should attempt it anyway?" EDI asked.

"Nobody ever fell in love without being a little bit brave," she shrugged, thinking about her first admission of her crush on Garrus.

EDI hung her head in thought. "I see." Then she looked up again and smiled. "I think you have improved my chances, Shepard. Thank you." Her tone was almost giddy and she stood up, straightening her body and standing a bit more confidently than she had been when she first came in.

Shepard shooed her with a grin and on her way out, she nearly bumped into Garrus as he stepped out of the elevator. Shepard heard him coming as he stopped to greet EDI and she scurried to intercept him before he could see his gift. "Hey," he said in greeting when Shepard pulled him inside and turned him to face the door. He chuckled. "What's going on?"

"I think I just had the birds and bees talk with EDI," Shepard said chuckling. When Garrus cocked his head, unfamiliar with her turn of phrase, she put her hand up to her mouth and whispered. "Sex..."

"Uh huh," he said one brow plate raised in curious humor. "Do I want to know?"

"Probably not," she waved her hand dismissively. "But I got you something."

"A present for me? If it's something you're going to re-gift back to yourself, I don't want it... It's not an Atlas is it?" He asked jokingly.

"Like I'd give that to you," she snorted. "But I think you'll like it just the same. Close your eyes." He obliged her and she awkwardly led him down to the living area where the rifle waited on the coffee table. She positioned him so he was facing the right direction and then said, "Surprise!"

He opened his eyes and she threw her arms out like a presenter on a game show, showcasing the prize. His eyes fell on the rifle and they bugged out. "Spirits! Is that the Black Widow?" She thought his mandibles might fall on the floor in his surprise as she bit her lip and nodded. "Shepard," he dragged his eyes from the sniper rifle. "This is too much..." he tried to object.

She shook her head and hefted the heavy rifle to place it in his hands. He took it reverently and she said, "Consider it payment for all the times you've dragged me up out of the darkness."

He clicked his tongue at her like he needed no thanks. "It was my pleasure, Shepard. Really."

"You still deserve something nice," she insisted, placing a hand on his scarred mandible and trailing her finger down over his clan markings.

He took another look at the weapon and then placed it down on the couch. He pulled her gratefully into his arms. "Thank you," he purred, a double meaning in his words. They stood in silence holding each other, each taking the other's burdens and shouldering them for a time. Finally, he asked. "How did things go with Kaidan?"

"I don't know how, but he already knew about us. We had a good talk and I think we're okay," she said with a sigh, the weight of that particular burden having floated away earlier in the day.

He pulled back and gently turned her head to get a better look at her jawline where her scar had resurfaced. He traced his thumb lightly over the spot and hummed. "At least your face seems to agree," he said with a smile.

"It's gone?" she asked, reaching up to feel for herself.

He took her curious hand in his and nodded. "We've still got some time on the Citadel before we leave. How about I buy you dinner?"

"Are you asking me on a date, Garrus Vakarian?" She asked with a grin.

"Well, someone has to pay for your meals now that you spent more than a year's worth of C-Sec salary on a gun," he quipped.

"You're such a romantic," she teased. "Lemme get out of this uniform and we can go. As long as we aren't going anywhere fancy. I've got t shirts." she said with a chuckle.

"That's my girl," he purred nudging her to go change.

 


	31. A Sprinkling of Hope

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard decides what's best for the Krogan, against the better judgement of most.

Two day's flight had them arriving at the diplomatic ships at nearly the same time as the other heads of races. It was agreed that the Normandy would serve as the neutral ground and Shepard headed down from her room after changing into her dress blues, hoping that they weren't starting another war in her conference room. The noise and bickering coming from the glass room was certainly indicating that might be the case as she cocked her head urgently at the two women guarding the scanners. They both shrugged their apology and finally the scanner allowed her to pass. She walked into the room to the Salarian Dalatrass pointing a finger in Wrex's face. "The Krogan is in no position to make demands."

"The 'Krogan' has a name. Urdnot Wrex," he boomed angrily. "And I'm not just some junkyard Varren you unleash whenever you're in trouble." Shepard took her spot around the table and crossed her arms. With a nod from Wrex in greeting he continued. "I've got my own problems. Reaper scouts have arrived on Tuchanka. So why should I care if a few Turians go extinct?"

"Trying to draw out negotiations will get you nowhere, Wrex. I have no time for it. Just tell us what you want," Victus said calmly, a voice of reason. This had been his idea after all.

"I'll tell you what I need..." Wrex said with a warning glance to Shepard. "A cure for the genophage."

The Salarian stepped back like she'd taken a blow to the face. "Absolutely not! The genophage is nonnegotiable!"

"The Krogan have paid for their mistakes," Shepard finally spoke up. After knowing Wrex and Grunt, she knew there was more to the Krogan than what they were believed to be. "The genophage has gone on long enough."

"One thousand four hundred and seventy six years. If you're keeping track," Wrex stated, adding depth to the sadness.

"It was a thousand years of peace, free from these... brutes!" the Dalatrass spat.

"Enough!" Victus growled. "Whether or not they deserve a cure is academic. It would take years to formulate one."

"My information says otherwise," Wrex informed them, pushing away from his threatening stance leaning across the table toward the Dalatrass. He moved to nudge Victus out of the way to pull up a vid he'd brought to show them. "A Salarian scientist, Maelon, grew a conscience. He was on my planet testing a cure on our females." The video popped up and began playing. Evidence of a raid on the lab and some other footage of female Krogan in a place Shepard didn't recognize.

"I remember," Shepard mused as she watched the vid. "His methods were barbaric."

"But what you didn't know is that other females survived his experiments. So the Dalatrass here sent in a team to clean up the whole mess... and to take them prisoner." Wrex explained.

"Where did you get this? It could be a fabrication!" The Dalatrass scrambled to find an explanation that would cover her ass.

Shepard crossed her arms as Wrex boomed. "Don't insult me! Those are my people, they're immune to the genophage and you're going to give them back!"

"Dalatrass is this true?" Victus sounded as disgusted as Shepard felt.

"How will curing the genophage benefit my people?" the Dalatrass asked, backed into a corner as the only advocate in the room against the cure.

"How long do you think you'll last alone against the Reapers? Because if you don't help, that's how it'll end up," Shepard threatened.

"And I'll be the last friendly Turian you ever see," Victus added.

"What's it gonna be?" Shepard asked as the Dalatrass fidgeted.

The Salarian wrapped her long arms around her waist and one hand came up to rub her forehead. "The females are being kept at one of our STG bases on Sur'Kesh." Shepard was already heading for the door to get Joker on course. She was going to get those females. "But I warn you, Commander! The consequences of this will..."

Shepard stopped dead in her tracks and spun to angrily address the Dalatrass. "Will be nothing compared to what happens if the Reapers win."

"Let's go get them!" Wrex bellowed.

"You're not setting foot on Sur'Kesh! This will take time to...." The Dalatrass growled.

"It happens now!" Victus threatened. "As a council SPECTRE, Shepard can oversee the exchange."

"We're going," Shepard agreed, with Wrex hot on her heels as she stormed off.

"I won't forget this, Commander. A bully has few friends when he needs them most!" The Dalatrass' words echoed after them as they passed through the scanners.

* * *

 

Hours later, Steve piloted the shuttle down towards Sur'Kesh. Shepard had never been to the Salarian home world. It was covered with lush forests and dense bodies of water that spilled in beautiful waterfalls everywhere you turned. Shepard was watching the beauty whiz by on the outside cams as they went. She was broken from her reverie by a soft clicking as Wrex readied his shotgun. She glanced over at him and sighed. "This is the Salarian homeworld we're headed to. They aren't used to seeing Krogan here, so let's keep it simple. We land, get the females and leave before anyone changes their mind."

"I still don't trust a word they say," Wrex grumbled, favoring her with a glance.

"Let diplomacy play out Wrex. You'll get what you want," Shepard assured him. She was almost as invested as he was in rescuing the females. The genophage was wrong and it needed to end.

"These females are the best and probably last hope for my people," he said, worry in his tone. It was strange to hear from the deep chested rumble.

"We'll bring them back, Wrex," Liara assured him. "Don't worry."

"I appreciate that, Liara," he said, his booming voice softening. "I wouldn't want anyone else along for the ride." A loud fabricated coughing came from the rear of the shuttle as Garrus cleared his throat pointedly. Wrex glanced at him and shrugged, his lips parting in a smile. "I suppose I can make room for you too, Garrus." Then he let out a booming chuckle.

"Figured you'd gone soft, sitting on your throne," Garrus quipped. "Forgot how to hold a gun."

Garrus was subconsciously petting his new Black Widow, freshly modded to his specifications. Shepard smiled to see him so pleased with the weapon. "Commander, I have the Salarian base on sensors," Steve announced from the cockpit.

She stood and moved to stand behind him, leaning on his chair. "Set her down," she ordered calmly, even though her nerves were on edge.

Steve piloted up to the landing zone on the roof of the facility and hovered there waiting for the all clear. "Salarian ground control says we don't have clearance to land."

"Tell them the Dalatrass authorized this herself," Shepard sighed, having expected some kind of trouble.

"I knew they'd never keep their word," Wrex growled his weight shifting the shuttle as he stomped across to the hatch. "Let's see them try to stop a Krogan air drop."

The hatch was open and he was out before she even growled the warning. "Wrex!"

She ran to the hatch as a Salarian shouted over his comms. "We have an unauthorized.... landing."

"And who authorized you to hold my race hostage?!" Several Salarians surrounded Wrex, their omnitools glowing in warning. He didn't seem to care as he growled at the threat and unleashed his biotics, knocking a few of the Salarians back before pulling his shotgun and taking aim. A plethora of sniper lasers landed on Wrex as he brandished the weapon, his lips quivering in a growl.

Shepard and the others dropped down after Wrex and she held up her hands in submission as one of the Salarians with a glowing omnitool said, "Halt!"

"Stand down! Hold your fire!" Another Salarian jogged up, unarmed. "Commander Shepard restrain your colleague! We only found out about this transfer a few moments ago."

"I'd like to avoid a diplomatic incident," she assured the newcomer as she nudged Wrex and looked at him with wide disapproving eyes.

"As would we," the Salarian agreed.

"But you have something valuable to Wrex," she explained.

"Something worth dying over," Wrex grumbled, still pointing his weapon.

"This matter can be resolved, but I must insist he remain under guard," the Salarian said slicing his hand through the air with finality.

Wrex growled angrily, not liking the idea, but Shepard turned to glare at him. "I can handle this, Wrex."

Wrex regarded her and she sighed in relief as their years of friendship paid off. "Anything goes wrong and all bets are off." he holstered his shotgun and followed the Salarian guards to a waiting area.

Steve landed the shuttle and Shepard followed the Salarian in charge. "I am Paddock Wikks and I appreciate your understanding, Commander. With war on everyone's minds, our people are on edge."

They looked out over the docking bay where a shielded container full of naked Yahg was being offloaded from a shipping crate. "I'd hoped to never see one of those again," Liara said quietly to Garrus as Shepard shuddered, the feeling mutual.

Wikks was amenable to Shepard's request to see the female Krogan and left them to get their clearance sorted out so they could enter the base full of sensitive information. Shepard passed through the docking bay, Garrus and Liara close behind. As they passed where Wrex was being held, she heard him booming about poems about waterfalls and the whole planet smelling wrong. She shook her head, smirking. Wrex was still the same old Wrex.

They ran into Kirrahe while they meandered around, waiting for news. The old Captain was now a Major and was very glad to see them. He promised his support to Shepard in the war, 'no matter what the diplomats say'. When Shepard asked why he would do that, he simply scoffed and reminded her that he owed her his life and the lives of his men for rescuing them back on Virmire. After the short catch up, she found Wikks and he directed her to an elevator. Just as she was about to get on, alarms sounded around the base. Wikks assured her they were handling it and told her to hurry.

She stepped into the elevator and it took them down three floors to an underground laboratory. She glanced around, getting her bearings in the dark room. "Ah, Shepard...Excellent timing. Good to... have you here."

She focused on the familiar voice as her eyes adjusted. A glowing omnitool approached her and she grinned, accepting Mordin's handshake. "Mordin?"

"Eyesight still sharp, surprise understandable. Hadn't expected to return to work..." he began to ramble.

"You're back with STG?" Garrus asked in shock.

"Special consultant. Had to be me. Someone else might have gotten it wrong..." He glanced around and then leaned in close to whisper to Shepard. "Helped female Krogan. Fed information to clan Urdnot. Encouraged political pressure to free females."

"You must be Wrex's inside source," she said understanding.

"Yes, can explain later. Security warnings not normal. Need to get off-world for sake of Krogan." He turned and started off like he was being dragged by a string. Shepard hurried along behind him. "Females had weakened immune systems. Side effect of Maelon's cure. These..." he stopped and turned to look in on a large room with slabs of covered bodies and sniffed noisily. "Didn't survive."

"What about Maleon's research? I thought we saved it." she asked, a pang of fear for the state of things making her voice harsh.

"Indeed, data saved," Mordin assured her. "But not complete. Lacks crucial details to reconstruct cure, but still usable for synthesizing from living tissue. Couldn't... save them."

"I'm sure you did everything you could, Mordin," she said softening her voice.

"Arrived too late," he said angrily. "Cannot delay now! One survivor, immune to genophage. Can synthesize cure from her tissue." He started off again, leading them across the lab.

"She's still here?" Shepard asked, her hope returning.

"Yes, last hope for Krogan," he informed her, stopping in front of another of the pods like they'd seen around the Yahg upstairs. "If she dies, genophage cure... problematic." Shepard approached the pod warily. A female Krogan stood in a large containment stand inside the pod. "Please be careful. Krogan slow to trust."

Shepard got as close as she could to the pod, resisting the urge to touch the glowing barrier that kept her contained. She looked up at the Krogan and the massive woman regarded her with suspicion. Shepard could see none of her features as she was covered in ornate ceremonial clothing indicative of a shaman. Shepard narrowed her eyes in curiosity. "I'm Commander Shepard, Alliance Navy," she introduced herself gently, trying to inspire trust.

"Are you here to kill me?" the Krogan asked, her voice deep but surprisingly feminine.

"Goddess what she's been through," Liara whispered as her omnitool glowed softly.

"Urdnot Wrex and I are here to take you home," Shepard assured her.

"Why? What am I to you?"

"You're the future of the Krogan race. I'm fighting for that." Her words were honest and the female seemed to understand that.

The alarms began to sound on their level then and Shepard glanced up, the urgency hitting her like a physical thing as the female Krogan said, "Then I hope you brought an army."

Shepard gave her one last glance and jogged over to a Salarian that was working on the console with readings on it about the Krogan. "What's happening?"

"We have multiple ships inbound," he informed her.

Her omnitool started buzzing and she pulled up a video communication from Wrex. "Shepard it's Wrex! Cerberus troops are attacking the base. Get the females out of there now!"

"Only one survived, Wrex. It might be safer down here," she said, already planning on how to defend the room.

"What so the Salarians can kill her like the others. No deal. If you still want this alliance, get her out of there!" Wrex demanded and disconnected.

"Dammit," she muttered to herself. "Release the female. We're leaving," Shepard demanded of the worker.

"I can't," he said. "Protocol states that during lock-down, no specimen...." he was cut off by a concentrated electroshock to the back of the head from Mordin's omnitool.

"Objection noted. Now, please release Krogan." The Salarian sheepishly tapped out the commands on his console and a door hissed open beside the pod. Mordin stepped inside. "Need to monitor pod as it clears quarantine procedures. Meet us at next check point, Shepard." She nodded as he closed himself in the small room and the pod and his room began to lift upwards. "Likely Cerberus opposes genophage cure."

Shepard stepped over to the Krogan female as she lifted silently up in her pod. "You'll see Tuchanka again, I promise."

Mordin shooed her to the elevator and she followed his instructions. She fidgeted as they waited for the elevator to get back down to their level. When the door opened, there was a nasty looking pipe bomb waiting for them the counter down to 3. "Oh, crap!" Garrus shouted as he grabbed her by the neck of her armor and dragged her away from the elevator.

"Get back!" she managed to shout before the thing went off, blowing them off their feet. She landed face first in the floor and her ears rang from the noise of the detonation in the confined space. As far as she could tell, she'd come out unscathed. She gathered shaky arms underneath her and pushed up onto her knees. A hand was on her back and she glanced to her right, relieved to see Garrus already on his feet. He was talking to her, but she couldn't hear what he was saying. She shook her head and waved a hand by her ears then glanced over to Liara. She was unharmed if a little shaken up. Garrus pulled her to her feet and some sound was starting to return. She could hear the alarms. "Is there another way out of here?" she asked, her head buzzing.

Some of the Salarians pointed to the opposite end of the room where a ladder led up to the next level. Mordin's voice was muffled, even from the speaker directly in her ear, like she was hearing him underwater. He warned that Cerberus was targeting him and the female. Wrex's voice was a bit more audible as he said he'd taken the shuttle and she needed to do whatever it took to get the female to the landing pad while he hounded Cerberus from the sky.

They fought through the bottom floor while all out war seemed to happen around them. Cerberus was dropping in from everywhere. Shepard felt crippled as her hearing slowly returned. Garrus grumbled something about sensitive human ears and signaled her to stay down until she could hear him. She tried to helpfully add her overload and incinerate to the mix without having to peer up from her cover, but she missed most of her targets. Finally the ringing stopped as she passed through a scanner to get through to the stairs that would lead up to the next checkpoint. She grinned and nudged Garrus playfully, shaking her head then opening her mouth in an O to pop the final hum from her hearing. "You back with us?" he asked hopefully.

"Oh yeah," she said cocking her gun and thanking her cybernetics. "Let's go."

"Warning!" the facility VI stated. "Yahg specimen has broken containment."

Just as the door opened, she saw two Cerberus troops being mowed down by the same naked Yahg they had seen on their way in. It turned, baring its claws to them and roared angrily before turning and running off in the opposite direction. "Careful, there goes the next Shadow Broker," Shepard quipped.

Garrus chuckled. "I could have sworn he was muttering 'T'Soni', the whole time."

"Not funny," Liara complained, her smile saying otherwise.

They headed up the stairs and saw Mordin and the Krogan under heavy Cerberus attack. They cleared the Cerberus troops before the barrier on the pod even began to flicker. "Quickly Shepard, technician dead. Clear us through the checkpoint," Mordin shouted from inside the lift.

She rushed over and interfaced with the console to push them through to the next checkpoint. "Are you okay?" she asked.

"Containment shield is holding. Will try to repair if necessary. Can't speak for Krogan's health, however," Mordin informed her.

"I am fine, Commander," The Krogan insisted.

"Females kept secret. Possibly a mole in STG. Could be indoctrinated," Mordin said meaningfully to explain the Cerberus presence. "If no Krogan alliance with Turians, Reapers left unchallenged."

"We'll do more than challenge them," she growled, finishing up on the bypass.

The pod began lifting and Mordin told them to meet them at the next check point just as Cerberus tried to attack them from the other side of the pod from a shuttle. Shepard ducked down below the pod to yank at the shuttle with her biotics, turning the shuttle on it's side to shake the troops loose. She grunted as the effort drained her biotics quickly. She heard Liara suck her teeth in a chiding display and then Shepard shrugged. They moved ahead, running into more and more Cerberus troops. After the next set of stairs, the Varren that had been in the containment pods on that level were loose and ravaging the Cerberus troops. Shepard hurried by, ignoring the fight and silently thanking the Varren. Then they passed through another door to the next check point. It was more of the same... kill Cerberus, restore power, clear the checkpoint. "Excellent, affinity for destruction intact, Shepard. Can clear us through now."

She asked again as she started the bypass, "How're you holding up?"

"Containment shield strong, but not designed for direct fire," Mordin said with a bit of worry as the shield on the pod flickered erratically.

"This isn't your problem, Commander. You don't know me," the Krogan said gently.

"No, but I'd like to," Shepard said, throwing her a smile. "Hang in there." She completed the bypass and asked Mordin, "How many more checkpoints?"

"Just the landing area. Hope Urdnot Wrex still waiting,"

"Wrex can't keep his hands off a fertile female. He'll be there," the female sighed.

"I'll see you up top," Shepard assured her then the pod began to ascend.

More Cerberus, more stairs and more Cerberus. "I'm starting to get deja vu in my scope," Garrus sighed.

"How's your Widow working out for you?" she asked him.

"Best rifle, I've ever owned," he said with a huge grin.

"Good. I expect payment in the form of favors," she grinned back.

Liara groaned and Shepard flushed, realizing she had forgotten to set her mic to their private channel. There was a chuckle from Mordin and Wrex boomed out a laugh from the shuttle. "Did I just hear what I think I heard?" he bellowed.

"Not the time, Wrex," Liara said, her soft voice raised in alarm as more Cerberus troops dropped in to assault them.

Wrex laughed again as Shepard incinerated a couple of Cerberus troops that were huddled together. "My offer from the SR1 still stands. You can touch my plates anytime, Shepard."

If they were going to poke fun at her, she was going to play along. "I like to walk on the wild side, Wrex. I prefer my plates dextro infused."

"Chafing," Mordin reminded her softly. She chuckled, throwing an overload around her cover to take out the last shielded Centurion standing by the pod.

"That hasn't been a problem yet," Garrus hummed, taking the same route through the embarrassment as she was. Humor.

Shepard stood up from her cover, glancing around to be sure no one was left then headed to the pod to give the final release command. The pod transferred to the loading area and hovered in the air while the decontamination cycle began to hum. "Shepard! Heads up! You've got incoming!" Wrex yelled suddenly.

From high in the sky, an Atlas fell through the clouds and slammed into the ground, breaking the concrete beneath it's feet. It recovered from the drop quickly and scanned the area. It spotted Shepard by the console and it's rocket arm lifted and fired directly at her. She scampered out of the way, throwing herself onto her ass and skidding behind some planters for cover. The rocket exploded on the console and Shepard cursed. "You alright?" Garrus asked from a few feet away.

"Yeah, fine," she grumbled tapping out her overload.

"Shepard, I can't land until you deal with that thing! It's too dangerous," Wrex shouted.

"Door is damaged! Can't get out!" Mordin cried, kicking at the offending doorway.

"Stay clear! I've got this!" she barked, tracking the Atlas as it moved to try and circle around to flank her. She slipped around the planter to the other side, careful not to show her head to the pilot.

"Protect the Krogan, Shepard, she's vulnerable!" Mordin reminded her as if she needed it.

She fired off the overload and put a dent in the Atlas' shields. Garrus overloaded it as well, and then she took a few pot shots at it's window with her pistol, drawing it's attention. "Put that new scope to good use, Big Guy!" she called out to Garrus as her overload charged again.

"Ready," he said as she noticed him with his visored eye buried in the scope. She fired off the overload and the shields went down, the sound of broken glass music to her ears. Garrus' Widow not only cracked the Atlas' glass when he fired it, but the glass shattered, leaving the pilot exposed. Liara grabbed the stunned Cerberus pilot with her biotics and lifted him out of his seat.

"What are you getting old, Shepard? What's taking so long?" Wrex growled in her ear.

"Hey, I used up my amp power tipping that shuttle," she defended herself as she took aim with her pistol and head-shotted the floating pilot. There were a few straggling troops to deal with and she and the others took them out easily.

"Shepard, I think you did it. Looks clear from here. I'm coming in now." Wrex landed the blue Alliance shuttle beside the pod and hopped out, his shotgun in hand, just in case. "You had me worried there for a minute," he rumbled, slapping her shoulder and nearly knocking her down.

"Let's make this quick," she said as Garrus pried open the lift to let Mordin out and they all approached the female's pod.

Mordin stepped into the pod as the barrier fell and held out his hand gallantly to help the female out. Wrex grunted and pushed him aside then held his own hand out. "Let's get you out of there," he said, his voice softer than she'd ever heard it.

Mordin brushed his sleeve off where Wrex and shoved him and harrumphed. Garrus stepped up next to Shepard and his arm brushed hers. She nudged him playfully "That was a nice shot," she whispered.

"I aim to please," he purred.

The female ignored Wrex's hand and walked out of the pod on her own strength, glaring at him as she passed, her head held high. Some Cerberus troops landed nearby, jumping from a lone shuttle that was still hovering around the destroyed facility. The female grabbed the shotgun from Wrex's grip and shot the two troops that were running toward them with scary precision. The troops fell and she made sure there were no more before shoving the gun back at a gaping Wrex and pushing past him. "I can handle myself, Wrex."

Wrex turned toward Shepard, rubbing his chest where she'd hit him with the shotgun and grunted. "Hmph... Women."

Shepard watched him follow her into the shuttle with a grin and then heard the familiar modified voice of a Cerberus troop. She drew her pistol, leaving Garrus in her dust as the trooper gagged and gasped around the pellet holes as he died. "We..." the trooper tried to speak.

She knelt beside him, trying to hear through the bloody gurgle of his voice. "Why is Cerberus here? What do you want?"

He grasped at her armor, trying to gain purchase as he struggled out his last breaths. She turned away, as his body went limp and cursed. What a waste.

* * *

 

Back on the Normandy, tensions were high as Wrex and Victus tried to coexist while Mordin worked on synthesizing the cure. Both of them came to Shepard with requests to investigate missing members of their race. Wrex said his might have to do with the Rachni, and Victus said that the missing Turians had crash landed on Tuchanka while trying to handle a top secret mission, though he wouldn't give her details. They both huddled in the war room making the place inhospitable for all the animosity stinking up the room. Shepard escaped to the med bay where Mordin had set up to run tests and stabilize 'Eve' as he had called her.

Shepard and her had a very enlightening conversation where she explained how she had become a shaman of the female clan and why she had chosen that path. Wisdom comes from pain and the genophage has made us very wise. Eve had told her. Those words stuck with Shepard. Here was a woman who had attempted to start a family to keep her race alive and when she'd been cursed with a still born like many Krogan, she had not given up. She had tried everything she could to fight on. She'd even handed herself over to Maelon in an attempt to save her people. Shepard had a massive amount of respect for the woman. As a Shaman, she had surrendered her name, which was why Mordin had dubbed her Eve and Shepard felt awful not knowing her real name. Eve insisted it was alright and promised if they all survived, perhaps one day she would tell her.

Shepard left Eve with a lot of things on her mind. Family had never been something she'd ever even toyed with in her life. Now that she was with Garrus, she supposed it was probably something she would never have, if they even made it out of this war in one piece. She was distracted as she caught up with Mordin listening to him tell her that if they were able to cure the genophage, he would probably stay on the Normandy to help out. She was glad to have him back, even as he rambled on about retirement after the war. She chuckled as he expressed an interest in a beach and collecting seashells. "You'd go crazy inside an hour," she teased.

"Hm, perhaps run tests on the seashells," he said with a grin and went back to his small lab area that he'd set up in the corner of the med bay.

While Mordin worked, Shepard took her team to Utukku to investigate Wrex's claims about Rachni. When she stepped off the shuttle, she was amazed and elated to see Grunt leading Aralakh Company. He shoved about 6 of his people out of the way to grip her up and lift her off her feet in a bone crushing hug. "Shepard!" he shouted excitedly.

"What're you doing here?" she asked a little breathlessly as he set her back on her feet.

"I could ask you the same question! Didn't those idiots lock you up?" he asked, his mouth wide in a excited grin.

"They did," she agreed. "Put me in lock-down to keep the Batarians off me. Didn't want problems with the council while they prepared for war, but the situation changed."

"Yeah, they got bigger problems, alright," he said with a deep chuckle. "It's why I'm out here running Aralakh Company. They're tough, think they're invincible. Reckless, but effective." His tone was proud and Shepard couldn't help but smile as she realized that her little tank bred Grunt had grown into a pretty good example of the Krogan race.

She brushed off her armor and shrugged to settle a few pieces back into place before backhanding his chest. "You were a pain in the ass Grunt, but if your Krogan are half the soldier you are, we might make it out of here."

"Heh, Glad you're here to crack some heads Shepard! Hard to believe this might be Rachni. Seems crazy." He paced away from her. "A chance to fight the old enemy? Impossible to resist."

"We're just here to find the scouts that went missing. We don't know if the Rachni are involved," she said holding up a hand and hoping that it wasn't the case.

Grunt was in agreement with the logic, but told her the place smelled wrong. She was inclined to trust his instincts. She, Garrus and James headed off toward the cave systems that the scouts had been investigating. The camp they'd made had been trashed and the only way in was through a prefab unit that hung precariously near the edge of a brand new chasm. Shepard took a breath and started in. As the lightest of the three she tried to hurry across to get the extra weight off the shifting unit. Her plan backfired when she stepped too close to the middle to get around a stack of crates that blocked her path. "Look out!" James shouted as the whole unit shifted and she lost her balance. She went tumbling out the wide opened side door and fell into the chasm. She landed hard a good 50 meters below as the unit followed her down. She covered her head as James threw him self to her side so he didn't land on her and slammed down nearby. When the noise of the metal unit sliding down the cliff face ceased above her head, she chanced to remove her arms from her vision. James was getting to his feet and Garrus hopped out of the unit having ridden it all of the way down. He jogged to her side and helped her up.

"Shepard!" Grunt's voice echoed from above. "You in one piece?!"

She glanced back and forth to her people as her shields reformed around her having absorbed the impact with the ground. "Looks like we're all okay!" She called up. "Keep in radio contact." She brushed herself off and pulled her shotgun, heading for the large cave entry ahead of them. Outside, they found a body of one of the scouts and Grunt told her to take his weapon. The weapon was an M-451 Firestorm. Shepard grinned, holstering her shotgun. "I've always wanted a flamethrower," she mused, flicking on the flashlight on the end of the weapon as they passed into the cave system.

"Is that, webbing?" Garrus asked as she burned through a sticky barrier that blocked their path.

"Looks like it," she sighed with a shudder.

"Did you bring your bug spray?" Garrus teased.

"Be thankful I'm not using it on you," she grumbled, not prepared to be fighting Rachni.

"Well, the only biotic here is you, so if there are any flying tentacles this time, blame yourself," he chuckled while she burned her way into the next tunnel. They passed deeper into the cave and the little bit of sunlight they had disappeared to be replaced with an inky blackness that made Shepard's skin crawl. "This darkness is going to make it a little harder, Shepard."

She glanced back at him, the only thing she could see was the glow of his visor and a couple of lights on his armor. "Everybody be ready," she said irritably.

She kept her gun's light trained on the ground below her so there were no surprises in her footing. "Movement," Garrus whispered the warning. "Anybody catching that?"

"Oh yeah," James agreed from somewhere off to her right flank.

She had been pretending that the skittering noises she was hearing were all in her head, but it was hard when someone pointed out the small figures as they squeaked by. They soon happened upon large egg shaped pods blocking their path. Shepard approached the pods to carefully step around the things, but as soon as she got near enough, they burst open, the acid like substance inside destroying her shields. "Watch your step," she warned, backing up and bumping into Garrus' chest. He steadied her when she jumped.

"Maybe you could burn them open," he suggested.

Confirmation of the Rachni came soon after as they found their way into a wide open space with a bit more light. Not only were there Rachni, but they had received some Reaper upgrades. The large tentacled bugs were now half cyborg, half puss filled incubators that when you punctured the fleshy bubbles spouted the tiny kamikaze swarmers that poisoned the air when they exploded. She growled in frustration as she fought off the swarmers with the flamethrower and spotted some husks moving in from their left. "Husks!" she warned.

James set to work on the husks, lobbing grenades into their midst. "Careful with the structure!" Garrus shouted as one of the grenades landed much too close to a stone pillar that seemed to be helping hold the cavern up overhead.

Once they'd cleared the room, Shepard nervously glanced around making certain she'd burnt all of the swarmers she could. "Grunt, Rachni presence confirmed. Modified and very dangerous!" she announced over the comm.

"Finally something to kill," he said happily as he and his team made their own way through up above them.

Garrus tapped her on the head as she moved to continue ahead. "Helmet, Shepard."

She loathed to use her helmet in the dark space, but if they were fighting poisonous enemies, he was right. James was strapping on his own helmet and she sighed. Further along the path, they were blocked by a large metal claw like structure. She traced the Reaper wiring back to a power node and overloaded the system to drop the blockage. As they passed through, Garrus grabbed her just as she was lining up a shot with the flamethrower to take out the webbing that served as a secondary blockage to their path. The ground rumbled beneath them and they dodged out of the way as the ceiling caved in. "Looks like we're finding another way out of here," Shepard grumbled as the cave in blocked their exit.

"What was that noise, Shepard?" Grunt asked over the comms. "Sounded bad."

"Cave in. We're all right," she relayed picking her way up a small incline.

"Good. Didn't wanna dig ya out," Grunt rumbled teasingly.

"Well, that hurts my feelings, Grunt," she pouted.

"Yeah, yeah," he brushed off her banter.

They made their way around toward the central chamber on their radar. Before they got there, they found another node that she overloaded to open a blockage and let Grunt and his team in to where they were. Grunt agreed to hold the area while her and the others went along ahead. The only way in was a tiny crawl space near the floor of the cavern. "You expect me to squeeze in there, Shepard?"

"Hell, Big Guy, you've squeezed into smaller spaces," she said with a grin.

James let out an appreciative chuckle as Garrus hummed when she dropped to her stomach and army crawled through the narrow opening. He was right behind her in spite of his limited movement in the tiny area. "I have to say, the view from back here isn't too bad," he joked.

James grumbled. "Speak for yourself, Scars."

They came out in a gigantic cavern. Smack dab in the middle, drawing their attention was a crumbled and defeated shell of a Rachni. The thing was massive, it's head the size of her body. She couldn't see much more of it because it was held down with wiring and more of the sticky webbing. As she approached the sad looking creature, out of nowhere a mess of the metal barriers from before sprung up all around the center, encasing the Rachni and blocking them from getting to it. Shepard rushed to overload all of the nodes she could find while they were set upon by more of the ravaged Rachni and husks. After she'd taken out the third node, their attackers began to retreat back into the various tunnels they'd come from. The last barrier fell and she turned to stare into the face of the gigantic Rachni. "Shepard, the Rachni are backing off," Grunt informed her over the comms with surprise in his voice. "Whatever spooked them won't last. Finish the job."

The large Rachni regarded her, it's head cocked to the side. It's five pronged mouth opened and closed and all around them, the bodies of the rest of the Krogan scouts, wrapped in thick webbing, began to speak, their voices resounding through the cave. "Si...lence..."

"Dios!" James said, raising his gun and backing away from the nearest talking corpse.

Shepard understood what was happening, having seen it before on Noveria. She lowered James' weapon with a shake of her head as the Rachni continued to speak. "The... maddening sour note has ceased."

"What are you?" Shepard asked with curiosity.

"The last Queen. We listen for the children... They are silent, hollow." The voices echoed eerily around them as Shepard realized that this was the same Rachni she'd released on Noveria. She certainly had grown. "The machines come and take them to war. They die alone, silent, far away."

"The Reapers did this to you?" she confirmed.

"Yes! The sour note of the machines is everywhere!"

"I let you go back on Noveria. You promised not to interfere anymore. The Rachni were supposed to disappear," Shepard sighed pinching the bridge of her nose.

"We remember!" the queen insisted and in her state, Shepard was inclined to believe her. "We kept our promise, retreated back through the relay. We started a new home. Beautiful children. Harmony." As she spoke, Garrus took on a very Shepard-esque role and poked at the webbing attached to one of the Krogan corpses, getting a bit stuck on his fingers. She smiled as she listened to the Queen plead her case while he rubbed the sticky substance on the rough rock wall beside him and shrugged at her crossed arms. "But, the machines came. They heard our song. Their shriek of sour notes drowned us out."

"They can't hurt you anymore," Shepard offered, hoping she was right in thinking that destroying the nodes would stop her suffering.

"Yes. We... understand." the Queen agreed.

"Can you still feel the Reapers? Can they influence you?"

"We hear the machines, but they cannot control us. Remove this last shackle and we are free." There was a final node sitting just below the Queen's head to Shepard's right. While Shepard debated what the right answer was, the queen's head lifted in fear. "What? The Children return. They will destroy us all! Release us!"

"We're getting movement here," Grunt rattled over the comm in her ear. "A lot of movement."

"Copy that, Grunt," she said, anxiety mounting as the decision weighed heavily on her. "Are you capable of fighting the Reapers?" she asked the Queen.

"We hate the machines. We will fight for our unborn children. Release us!" Her rage was obvious as she thrashed against her bonds.

"She's hurt bad, Commander," James warned, sensing her decision before she even made it. "We'll need to buy her some time."

Shepard nodded. "Shepard, we're out of time! We stay here, Aralakh Company dies! Is that clear?" Grunt shouted over the comm again.

Shepard steeled her resolve. "Listen up! Aralakh Company holds the Rachni off while the queen escapes!" She looked to the queen. "We'll buy you some time." Starting up her overload program she said over the comm. "Grunt! Fall back to our position and lead us out."

"Damn you, Shepard! I'm leaving my team! On my way!"

"Shepard, you sure about this?" Garrus asked, making certain she knew what she was doing.

"That's an order," she snapped. They were out of time. "She's too valuable an asset to lose." Shepard overloaded the node and the shackles on the queen snapped apart. The queen fell from where she was suspended and with one last ear splitting roar of thanks, she scurried off in the opposite direction. "Now get us out of here!" Shepard called to Grunt who was blasting his way through a wall above then dropped down to lead them to a nearby tunnel that would take them out.

They ran as quickly as they could as the hoards of Rachni descended upon them from everywhere. Grunt happily shot as many as he could as they tried to drop on them from above, laughing uproariously as they splatted on the ground before him. Shepard began to out run him, not stopping to shoot at anything. She came to a blind corner and was forced to halt as she threw herself back before the group of Rachni spotted her. She hefted her shotgun and prepared to rush the group, her skin blue with her biotics. Grunt shoved her against the wall and shook his head. "Shuttle's down that path! I'll hold them off." She pursed her lips and started to protest, but he shoved her again, this time toward the path. "Get outta here, Shepard!"

She regarded him as her heart sunk in her chest. She felt like she'd practically raised him. How had it come to this? Garrus keened behind her, half in sadness as he knew what would happen and half in urging for her to do what Grunt asked. A tear burned her eye as she pressed her lips together and landed a reassuring hand on Grunt's shoulder. Knowing nothing she said would make it better, she squeezed his shoulder and followed as Garrus and James headed for the light that showed the surface. Her limbs felt like lead as she ran, fighting the urge to turn back and rush to Grunt's rescue. Garrus stopped and turned, to be sure she didn't try it. Seeing she was still following, he continued to run. When they cleared the cavern, she stopped and dropped her palms to her knees to catch her breath as she nearly hyperventilated. James had already made it to the shuttle, Garrus not far behind. "Cortez, we're the last ones out," she choked over the comm as the shuttle hovered less than a hundred feet away.

"Copy that Commander, shuttle is waiting." Steve's voice was soft in understanding.

Her feet dragged as she shuffled to the shuttle. This was her fault. She hadn't been fast enough. She'd made a wrong decision somewhere. She paused and glanced behind her at the cavern that would serve as Grunt's tomb. She couldn't believe her eyes. Her knees nearly gave out underneath her as she saw standing tall in the entry to the cave, the blood soaked shape of a Krogan. She rushed back to his side as the stench of Rachni filled the air around her. He limped toward her, a giant grin on his face. "Grunt!" she shouted, cluing in the others.

When she reached his side, he said. "Anybody... got... something to eat?" The solidly built Krogan grabbed hold of her shoulder and she caught him just as his legs went out from under him. She stumbled as his full weight rested on her and she spread her legs and braced herself to support him. Garrus came out of nowhere to take some of the burden from her, purring in his chest. She'd been prepared to kick herself for the next few weeks, but now, Grunt was safe and the Queen was free. She chuckled around tears as they dragged the kid back to the shuttle.

* * *

 

They dropped Grunt off on the Citadel in a quick fly by on their way to Tuchanka. Once they reached Krogan space, they got wind of Cerberus causing havoc on the surface. Before Shepard went after the missing Turian platoon, she shut down the Cerberus activity. The Turian platoon turned out to be led by Victus' son. They had held their own pretty well after the crash, but the Reapers had still put a dent in their numbers by the time Shepard reached them. They were ready to abandon their mission until she talked some sense into the young lieutenant. They had been sent to retrieve a bomb that Cerberus had gotten their hands on. Shepard agreed to help them return to the surface and complete their mission. It was as they approached the bomb site that Victus' son revealed that the bomb wasn't planted by Cerberus. It was an ancient Turian bomb planted centuries ago as a countermeasure in case the genophage didn't have the desired effect. The mission was an overall success in terms of stopping the bomb detonation, but the Primarch's son had sacrificed himself to see it done. It was an awkward evening on the Normandy.

The next morning, Mordin informed her that he had finished synthesizing the cure and it was ready for dispersal. He suggested using the Shroud to blanket the atmosphere as the quickest solution. The Shroud was a gigantic tower set up near Tuchanka's equator that served as a planet wide atmosphere cleanser after the radiation bleed from the nuclear war they'd suffered at their own hands. It was a brilliant idea right up until Shepard received a private message from the Dalatrass. The woman informed her that there was a fail-safe set up at the shroud to prevent this very thing. She offered Shepard Salarian assistance in the war if she allowed the sabotage to take place.

With the burden of that decision on her shoulders, combined with a Reaper that had parked itself outside the Shroud, they formulated a plan for a two front attack. The Turians would fly in with fighters to distract the Reaper while Wrex and the Krogan came in from the ground in Tomkahs. Shepard and her team joined the Krogan on the ground, ready to protect Eve and Mordin as they made their way to the Shroud.

Shepard, Garrus, Liara, Wrex, Eve and Mordin sat in the shuttle on their way down to the surface. Shepard was unusually quiet as Wrex rambled happily about Krogan expansion after the genophage was cured. She could feel two sets of eyes on her. Both Garrus and Eve watched her closely as she retreated into her own thoughts. "Commander," Eve finally prompted her. "Is something troubling you?"

Shepard looked up, the decision to tell the truth on the tip of her tongue. "I got a message from..." she was cut off as the shuttle rocked violently.

Cortez announced that husks were congregating at the landing zone. They got out of the shuttle and the conversation was forgotten in the hubbub of defeating the husks and placating the other Krogan clans when their distrust of Mordin became a problem. In the end, it was Eve who put them in their place. She was a wonderfully stabilizing voice for the males. Shepard hoped she survived the cure. With Mordin's help and Maelon's data, Shepard was confident. Between Eve and Wrex, the Krogan had a fighting chance to be a real voice in the galaxy again. And not one of malice, but of peace.

They separated into their Tomkahs, Shepard opting to send Garrus and Liara in the truck with Wreave to keep an eye on him. He'd been the only really disapproving face in the bunch after Eve's speech. Shepard stayed with Wrex, Eve and Mordin. Wrex started in on his giddy speeches again, and again Shepard became introverted as she listened to his every word, making certain he was going to use the gift of the cure not for revenge, but for a new beginning for his people. Eve still watched her, sensing something on her mind. When she questioned her again, Shepard stood and pulled up the recording on her omnitool of her meeting with the Dalatrass. "Did she think we wouldn't notice?" Wrex growled angrily.

"Correctly," Mordin sighed, "But familiar with STG work... can compensate. Did not come all this way for nothing."

Shepard let out a breath of relief as Eve bowed her head, the tone of her voice indicating a smile. "You have just saved our people from another genocide, Commander."

"I told you we could count on her," Wrex boomed.

His loyalty and friendship had been hard won and Shepard felt a hint of pride at his words. "Yeah, well she really puts the 'ass' in Dalatrass. I'd do anything to shut her up." Shepard's words were a joke, but in a way she really felt them. The woman had really gotten under her skin with her double dealing and back stabbing.

The truck came to a halt and Wrex stood up. "Why are we stopping?"

They were miles from the Shroud yet. "Stay here," Shepard said, taking out her pistol and hopping out of the truck to see what was happening. Garrus and Liara had emerged from their truck as well to get a look. They followed Shepard to the Krogan kneeling in front of the jam up of Tomkahs. "What's the problem?"

He indicated ahead of them. "The road's out. The trucks can't get through."

Shepard attempted to contact the Turians to hold off their attack, but apparently the Reaper already knew they were there. As they flew around it's head, Garrus said, "An airstrike isn't enough. We need to get in that fight."

"Dammit!" Shepard growled her frustration and snapped at the Krogan. "I don't care if we have to build a new road. We're going!"

She turned to head back to her truck to tell Wrex what was happening and she heard a mayday over the comms. One of the Turian fighters was hit by the Reaper's laser and had lost control. It was careening straight for them in a blaze of smoke and fire. "Move!" Garrus shouted, shoving Liara out of the way as the fighter slammed into one of the trucks parked to the rear of the convoy. The truck was thrown into the air and flipped end over end before landing on top of one of the others. Shepard continued to scoot out of the way on her ass while shouting to Wrex "Wrex! Get the female out of here, now! GO!"

Wrex's truck's tires kicked up dirt as he slammed his foot down on the gas and it shot over the broken road. Wreave's truck was right on his tail. Shepard sighed as she picked herself up and scrambled to think of a plan. The rest of the trucks were smashed to bits and the road had collapsed completely. She ordered the Turians to fall back so they could save their pilots from the fate of the one who'd already been shot down. She spun in circles, mapping the landscape as Garrus and Liara regrouped around her. After he'd circled her checking for injuries, Garrus pointed out a tunnel on the opposite side of the road. They jumped across a wide crack in the road and cautiously entered the darkness. It was even less bright than the tunnels on Utukku and Shepard sighed flicking on her flashlight so she could see.

The ground continuously rumbled beneath their feet as they navigated the pitch black tunnels. Wrex reported no such rumblings on the surface and Eve suggested it was 'Kalros, the mother of all Thresher Maws'.

"You've got to be kidding," Shepard said, stopping in her tracks and dropping her arms in defeat, temporarily taking away the light as her gun pointed downwards.

"When the Krogan name a Thresher Maw, you know you're in trouble," Garrus said his voice echoing through the cavern as another tremor rumbled under their feet. "They don't think anyone's ever going to kill it."

Shepard sighed and lifted her gun again to leave the ruins as quickly as possible. They stumbled upon the corpse of a Reaper modified Rachni just before reaching the bright sunshine of the topside. They warned Wrex and moved on. The surface of the ruins defied everything they knew about Tuchanka. Among the rubble and broken statues of the 'Ancients', there were specks of green plant life growing up in the radiation soaked soil. Eve called it 'hope'. Shepard called it beautiful. They fought off more Reaper troops as they made their way to Wrex and the truck as he drove outside the abandoned city. Kalros made her appearance a few times, rumbling past and tearing up the ground in her wake. She didn't seem to notice they were there. She was more interested in the vibrations of the larger trucks. Wrex maneuvered as best as he could, losing Kalros' trail. When they paused to pick up Shepard and her team as they found the exit to the city, Kalros reappeared to swallow Wreave's truck whole. Shepard scrambled into the truck and Wrex drove off before she realized they were there.

Finally they were outside the Shroud. There was about a mile of ruins between them and the Reaper who was sitting contentedly outside the Shroud awaiting any challengers. Without their carefully laid plan to distract it, things looked hopeless. Eve suggested summoning Kalros to the Reaper. "How?" Shepard asked skeptically. Eve explained that inside the ruins were the two largest maw hammers in existence. If they hit them both, Kalros would come. It was the only plan they had. "Let's make sure we all get out of this alive," Shepard agreed. "We're gonna have one hell of a story to tell."

As she grinned at Wrex, excitement bubbling in her chest at the insanity of the plan, he stopped her. "Wait!" He regarded her with an expression she couldn't recognize as it spread over his face. She cocked her head and approached him. "I want you to know that no matter what happens, you've been a champion to the Krogan people, a friend of clan Urdnot, and a sister to me." He grabbed her hand and shook it vigorously. "To every Krogan born after this day, the name Shepard will mean 'HERO'!" She was truly touched, tugging his hand and pulling him into a hug which made him bellow with laughter. "Now, let's show them why," he grunted, pushing her off him as she felt renewed. Wrex believed in her. They would succeed no matter what. For his sake. He ran off solo to take care of some approaching Rachni, shouting inspiration.

She turned to Mordin and Eve as they went in the opposite direction to the labs connected to the Shroud facility to finish synthesizing the cure. "See you on the other side."

"Stay alive, Shepard. Will have cure ready," Mordin said as he strolled off.

She was left with Garrus and Liara, and Garrus rumbled with his own excitement. "I knew I was going to hate that look on your face," he quipped as she scrambled to climb up into the ruins.

"This is going to be fun," she said with a grunt as she landed on the other side.

"You really need to take a look at your definition of fun, Shepard," Liara said her gaze lingering on the Reaper in the distance as it loomed over them.

They were set upon by Reaper troops of all kinds as they made their way through the ruins. Wrex said he was done with the Rachni and that he would head to raise the maw hammers so she could drop them when she reached them. Shepard pushed through the Reapers defenses, annihilating the troops that attacked. One of the cannibals succeeded in growing it's armor plating so she charged it and leapt on its back, grabbing hold of the plate and ripping with everything she had. "Now, Big Guy! Shoot it!" she yelled. Garrus turned his attention from the Marauder whose shields he was trying to overload to take aim at the thrashing cannibal as she rode its back.

"No good!" He shouted. "Hold it still!"

"Never mind!" she grumbled pulling out her omniblade. She grappled for purchase with her opposite hand, the slimy blood on her arm making her slip. She growled again and wrapped her arms around the neck of the thing as best she could, her omniblade humming near her face. She heard Garrus' distressed growl as he watched her struggle to get hold of the creature. She could see him pinned down where he was, his body tense with the need to help her. "Don't you dare!" she shouted as he twitched toward her.

She finally got a hold of the things neck with her right arm and jammed her omniblade into its vulnerable skull. She rode it to the ground as it fell, rolling to avoid the assault rifle fire coming from her left as a second Marauder closed in on her position. She threw herself behind a pile of rubble that lead to a staircase and quickly tapped out her overload. The Marauder boldly circled around and invaded her cover. As her overload charged, she stood and grabbed it by it's fringe and pulled it off balance. Her omnitool sounded and she hit the overload, her hand still in contact with the thing's head. It shrieked its displeasure as both their shields fell.She twisted its head and spun it around to face away from her and pinned it's arms in a hug, grabbing her left wrist with her right arm. "Are you insane!" Garrus shouted as she called her biotics and unleashed a Nova that exploded the Marauder in her grasp.

With her shields down, she was vulnerable and she gathered whatever power her amp had left and threw up a barrier just in time as an assault rifle began firing at her from another cannibal. She was covered in sticky bits of Marauder and Cannibal, making it difficult to grip her weapons. Another frustrated growl sounded over her earpiece as Garrus fired on the cannibal too late. It had apparently been snacking on its way to them and the plate was present. "I can't get a hold of it," Liara announced.

Shepard mumbled under her breath as she formulated a plan to get behind the cannibal. "Shepard..." Garrus growled a warning. "Your shields are down and your biotics are spent. Don't..."

Before he could finish, she was already sprinting toward the cannibal, dodging its gunfire by centimeters and she skirted its aim. She slapped it in the face with an incinerate and grabbed a hold of it's rifle, wrenching the gun from it's hands. A metallic roar echoed in its throat as the tough metal plating burned red hot from the incinerate. The whole time, Garrus cursed her in Turian and picked off a few lingering husks that looked like they might try to get frisky as she stood in the middle of the battlefield, exposed to the elements. Instead of trying to pry the melting plating from it's body as she had before, she touched an overload to its chest, using the conductivity to stun it and then stabbed up under the dripping metal to pierce its head. When it fell, she spun to see if there was anything else coming at her, but the only thing she saw was a very irritated Turian stomping briskly in her direction. "Wait," she held up her hands to placate him, but it was too late.

"What the hell were you thinking?!" he shouted, grabbing her bicep and lightly shaking her. "Dammit, Shepard..." he sighed and released her arm. "You nearly gave me a heart attack."

Her shields whispered back up around her as she sheepishly looked away. "It worked, right?"

If Turians could purse their lips, she guessed he would have. He settled for pulling his mandibles close to his face and raising one brow plate. His arms crossed over his chest. "Really?"

She grinned, knowing he wasn't angry. He knew she was competent. He was simply worried for her. "Come on," she moved to touch his face then thought better of it seeing the nastiness that was all over her hands and arms, and probably elsewhere. "We have a Reaper to deal with."

When she turned away from him to head for the stairway she'd seen, he shoved her playfully to show he wasn't mad. "Be careful," he whispered over their private channel.

Mordin informed them that he had some luck in the lab because the original strain of the genophage was still in storage there. That was a big help in helping to complete the synthesis of the cure. When they reached the top of the stairs then picked their way through a still standing bit of building to cross over on the higher ground, Liara gasped. "Look to our left."

Shepard glanced to the left and saw the Reaper, big as day, looming over them. She shuddered and her skin crawled, feeling like it was watching them. She crossed over the bridge, hopping a wide crack about halfway across. Whatever Garrus shouted next was drowned out by the terrifying whining groan of the Reaper's laser 'eye'. Her head spun to her left and bearing down on her was the red beam of ultimate death. Her breath caught in her chest and she scrambled out of the way, jumping back across the crack she'd just jumped over. The heat of the laser singed the back of her armor as it cut through her shields like she didn't even have any. The ground collapsed underneath her and all three of them went tumbling back down to the lower level on the opposite side of the wall that had blocked their progress. "Everyone alright?" she shouted, fear lancing through her body as she ignored the air that was thrown from her lungs as she hit the ground and scrambled to take cover.

"Fine here..." Garrus cleared his throat indignantly as she ran up to join her. "Mostly." Was he laughing?

"I think so," Liara breathed.

"Did we just get shot by a Reaper?" Garrus asked, the maniacal chuckle still in his throat.

She couldn't help joining him. "Consider that practice," she laughed as she caught her breath from the impact.

"Okay, Shepard, I raised the hammers. You have to activate both of them," Wrex's voice rumbled over the comms. "My advice is avoid the giant laser."

"Stick to cover," she agreed as she glanced around to see the Reaper knew exactly where they were. The next few minutes were pure chaos as they ran from cover to cover narrowly avoiding the almost infinite firing capabilities of the Reaper. They pushed forward. Her heart pounded in her chest and sweat dripped down her forehead. The heat of Tuchanka mixed with the adrenaline and the heat from the lasers making the run almost unbearable. Relief soon came in the form of the Turian fighters returning to the fray.

"We'll give that Reaper something else to fire at, Commander," a faceless voice assured her.

"I knew they wouldn't give up," Garrus said, pride in his people clear in his voice.

"Goddess be with them," Liara murmured.

Shepard pushed ahead, the maw hammers getting closer and closer. They were on opposite sides of the ruins, one to their left and one to their right. "This is crazy!" Garrus shouted as Brutes started raining down from the Reaper. It was right above them now. Shepard tried to ignore it as she dodged charging Brutes and the flailing limbs of the Reaper itself.

Three Brutes tried to surround her and she ducked as they charged. The Reaper did her a favor by stomping one of its 'legs' down and smashing the closest brute to mush. It splattered everywhere, and Shepard yelped in surprise at the extremely close proximity of the Reaper's leg. She could have reached out and touched it if she were so inclined. The other two Brutes backed off briefly, allowing her to lose them in the dust kicked up the the activity. She ran as fast as she could for the first hammer, slamming her fist into the button to activate it. The giant metal fist dropped and rang, a great quaking rumbling through the ground beneath her feet. She spun, realizing as she looked toward the second hammer that she had lost sight of her people. "Everyone still alive?" she shouted, getting short panicked answers from both of them.

She ran for the second hammer, abandoning the idea of fighting her way there and just hauling ass. Another of the Reapers legs slammed down in front of her and he skidded to a halt. She ran around the large metal construct and nearly bumped into another Brute on the other side. She shouted in frustration and knocked it back as far as she could by unleashing a Nova and then continuing to run. "Shepard, get that second hammer going." Wrex shouted at her.

"There's a Reaper in my way, Wrex," she shouted back, dodging another falling leg.

"Yeah I know. You get all the fun!"

She ignored his jab and scurried to the second hammer. When she got there and slammed her fist on the button, the others ran up behind her. As the hammer fell, she waved them off. "Go! Get back to the truck! I'll handle the cure!"

Garrus looked ready to protest but she waved them off again with widened eyes. It would be easier for her if all she had to worry about was herself. The ground was rumbling. She could feel Kalros surging her way toward them. Her team turned and reluctantly ran off to go back to the truck. She allowed herself a brief moment to catch her breath and wipe the sweat from her brow before she made her way toward the Shroud.

It stood hundreds of thousands of feet overhead, a plume of green chemicals spewing from it's tip, constantly regulating Tuchanka's atmosphere. The pounding of the maw hammers had chased off the Brutes, leaving her a clear path as long as she avoided the Reaper as it scrambled to turn and face the over-sized thresher maw as she leapt from the underground tunnel she'd made on her way to them and attacked. The noise of the fight was deafening. All around her, the ground shook. The Reaper kept trying to fire it's laser at the giant worm who had attached herself to it's 'face'. It stumbled and groaned, a metallic whining of hydraulics and anger. The maw shrieked as she tried to push the Reaper away from her territory. The Reaper spun, slamming the worm into the Shroud tower and dislodging it from it's face. As Kalros retreated back under the surface, Shepard scrambled out of the way, feeling like an ant trapped on a human battlefield. Everywhere she went something threatened to squash her. After a few moments of the Reaper shooting its laser at the ground where Kalros had disappeared, the worm reappeared behind it to latch onto it yet again. She smashed it face first into the ground, throwing off the massive machine's balance. It's legs whined and groaned under the pressure and it fell under the weight of the great maw. The rest of her body followed, coiling around the Reaper as it tried to fire out it's laser but hitting nothing but ground. The massive worm pulled the Reaper below ground with her, wrapping so tightly around it that Shepard heard the creaking and bending of metal as she crushed it.

The area went eerily silent when the maw disappeared with the Reaper. Shepard looked on in awe as the dust settled. Could their insane plan have actually worked? Shaking herself out of her shock, she continued in to the laboratory to help Mordin.

He was scurrying around inside, as the alarms went off everywhere. They had to get the cure distributed before the whole tower came down. When the maw's body had hit it, some damage had been done. There were fires burning and ash falling from everywhere. "Mordin! Is the cure ready?" she asked.

"Yes, loaded for dispersal in two minutes. Procedure traumatic for Eve, but not lethal. Maelon's research invaluable," Mordin said, frantically typing on a console.

"She's okay?" Shepard sighed in relief. Eve was too good of a person to let this kill her. Wrex would need her to help keep the Krogan in line after this was all over.

"Headed to safety now. Her survival fortunate. Will stabilize new government should Wrex get any ideas... good match. Promising future for Krogan," Mordin agreed, voicing her exact thoughts. Although it wasn't Wrex she had been worried about.

"Damn!" she shouted as a massive piece of the shroud fell into the lab, throwing chunks of debris in all directions.

"Control room at top of shroud tower. Must take elevator up," Mordin said quickly, indicating the glass enclosure to his left.

"You're going up there?!" she shouted, her heart stopping.

"Yes. Manual access required," Mordin nodded, typing in some code on his omnitool. "Have to counteract STG sabotage, ensure cure disperses properly."

"Mordin, this whole thing is coming apart! There's gotta be another way," she pleaded.

"Remote bypass impossible. STG countermeasures in place. No time to adjust cure for temperature variance." He lowered his head. "No... no other option. Not coming back. Suggest you get clear. Explosion likely to be... problematic." He sniffed and turned to head for the elevator.

"Mordin, no!" she cried, chasing after him.

He paused, and turned to look at her, acceptance in his features. "Shepard, please. Need to do this. My project, my work, my cure, my responsibility." He closed his eyes, standing in the middle of the elevator and smiled, inhaling a deep breath. "Would have liked to run tests on the seashells."

"I'm sorry," she choked, her gut wrenching as he calmly accepted his death.

"I'm not... had to be me..." he said, still smiling. The glass door on the elevator slid down to close him in. "Someone else might have gotten it wrong."

She watched him ride up until she could no longer see him, tears spilling freely from her eyes. As she picked her way back to the truck, she could hear him happily singing the stupid Gilbert and Sullivan song over the comm like he always did when he was working. His voice was sharply cut off as the Shroud exploded around him. A gentle dusting of golden flakes rained down around her. She held out her hand, catching one of them in her palm. The cure had survived. The shroud had dispersed the blanketing of snow like salvation just in time. Mordin had given his life to save the Krogan people. Shepard rubbed the smattering of dust between her fingers and her shoulders hunched as she cried for her friend.

She was pulled into an embrace so familiar she fell into it without even having to look to see who had touched her shoulders. Garrus keened alongside her, his posture lending no evidence to the horrible mourning sound reverberating in his chest. She pressed her ear to him, and they shared their pain. Mordin had been a good friend, to both of them, now he would be another name to grace the Memorial wall they'd had erected outside the elevator on the crew deck. It wasn't fair.

They slowly broke apart as Wrex and Eve stepped up to stare in awe as the hope of their people turned into reality. The cure rained down, silently, and Shepard looked up to meet Garrus' eyes that were full of sympathy. She forced a smile and brushed some of the dust from his shoulders. He offered her a touch of his forehead and she gladly accepted.

After a short silent ride back in the truck to the meeting grounds where the shuttle waited for them, Wrex stopped Shepard before she could leave. His voice was soft and caring. As soft as he could make it, she thought as he spoke. "A long time ago, my father betrayed me in this place. His own son... He tried to kill me, so I had to kill him... right over there." he pointed calmly to a spot on the ground. Eve stood beside him, studying his face with what looked like admiration as he continued. "That's what the genophage reduced us to... animals, but you changed that today, Shepard."

"Now we'll for fight for our children. Not against them," Eve agreed gently. She hung her head sadly. "It's just a pity Mordin had to die."

Shepard took a deep breath and moved to stand on the spot where Wrex had killed his father, looking out over the sacred ground of the Krogan. "He wouldn't have had it any other way... and I'm sure wherever he is, he's putting in a good word for us."

"We'll name one of the kids after him," Wrex offered. "Maybe a girl," he chuckled, bringing a soft smile to Shepard's face and another tear falling down her cheek.

"But you, Commander... We can thank you in person," Eve said approaching to place a hand on her shoulder.

"Tell the Turians I'll be deploying troops to Palaven immediately," Wrex said, his voice returning to it's usual gruff octave. "and when you're ready to kick the Reapers off Earth, you let me know. The Krogan are back in business!"

"Good bye, Commander." Eve said, patting once and then removing her hand from Shepard's shoulder.

"What will you do now?" Shepard asked of the large woman.

"Spread the hope you've given us. Even now, there are clans gathering in the Kelphic Valley. I'll go speak to them and make sure this gift isn't squandered... Thank you for all that you've done, and know that Urdnot Bakara calls you a friend."

Shepard graciously smiled, understanding the honor that was given to her in being told Eve's true name. With a final handshake and hug from both Bakara and Wrex, Shepard listlessly made her way back to the shuttle.

* * *

 

The task of removing her armor was a menial thing that she wished she hadn't needed to do quite so urgently. She peeled off the layers of gummed up metal and plastic, wrinkling her nose at the smell of blood as it got stirred up in the process. She didn't feel quite like she was really alive. The world was hazy around her as she washed up and dressed to go to her debrief with Hackett. Afterwards, she slumped her way to the war room where Garrus and the Primarch were looking over the troop deployment data. The Primarch looked pleased to inform her that Wrex had began deploying his troops to Palaven, so he was able to hold up his end of the bargain to assist Earth. "To that end, several dry dock ships stand ready to assist in building the crucible. Garrus will coordinate them."

"Uh, Yes, sir," Garrus said with a nod, surprise at the responsibility and honor heaped on him. Why was he always so unsure about his abilities?

"And when the time comes to deploy it, the full measure of our fleet will be there for Earth," Victus said, passionately. "May the spirits watch over us all."

Shepard watched him leave to get ready to depart the Normandy. He was needed back in charge of his own people, now that the negotiations were finished. As soon as he was out of sight, she slumped, her shoulders hunching and all trace of confidence squeezed out of her like the last dregs of toothpaste from the tube. She leaned heavily on the console surrounding the holo table, her breath leaving her in a deep, heavy sigh. "I'll start managing Turian support right away, Shepard. You must be exhausted." She felt his hand rub gently up her back. "Mordin dying... it can't be easy."

"I'll sleep when I'm dead," she snapped, shrugging his hand away. She wasn't angry with him, but there would be no sleep for her. She knew that the forest awaited her.

He chuffed, taking the words and her attitude at face value. "We both know you need a clear head to win a war. There's no room for mistakes here." His tone was insistent as a comforting purr slid over her skin like a blanket, warm and secure. "You should catch some shut eye." When she still didn't budge he said. "Besides, I know where you sleep. We'll wake you if anything comes up."

She sighed and pushed heavily away from the console. "If you insist."

His intentions were good, but she knew if she went up to her cabin, it would be to appease him, not to sleep. She dragged her feet to the elevator, for once not caring about the holdup at the scanners. She fed her fish and a much happier Ferguson in his new cage when she got up to her cabin, then sat on her couch to stare at the words on a data pad more than actually read them.

* * *

 

_The forest was still dark and cold. Her movement still impeded. All around her, the voices were growing louder and more insistent. She heard Ashley urging her to save Kaidan, she heard Mordin mocking her about chafing, she heard the screams of faceless innocents as they were mowed down by the red glow behind her that kept getting closer. Still the boy ran from her, still he burned._

* * *

 

The data pad dropped from her hand as she started awake. With a groan, she ground her teeth at herself for allowing her to close her heavy lids. After picking up the data pad, she tossed it angrily on the coffee table and went to splash her face with water. While she stared at her sunken eyes and pale skin in the mirror, there was a knock on her door. "It's open," she called with a sigh, thinking it was Garrus coming to check up on her.

"Shepard, there's something you need to hear," Liara's soft voice said as she entered the room.

She was relieved that Garrus hadn't caught her disobeying and she said, "All right."

"Is this a bad time?" Liara asked gently from the other side of the bathroom door.

"Thinking of all the lives it took to get us here," she admitted, the dream replaying in her head.

"That's thanks to the Reapers, not you," Liara said. After a silent pause she asked, "Are you thinking about anyone in particular?"

"There's a lot of people back on Earth dying while we gather our strength. They're wondering if we're ever coming back..." she sighed. "Friends, family. Parents and children. This isn't their fight, but they're buying us time with their lives."

"You'll spend it wisely," Liara insisted.

Shepard knew there was not much to be done, but still, it bothered her. "I had better." She opened the door and stepped out to speak with Liara face to face. "Didn't you have something for me?"

"The Salarian councilor has an urgent matter," Liara informed her as she studied her with those piercing blue eyes. The eyes of the Shadow Broker that saw everything. The eyes of a friend concerned for her.

Shepard pasted on a smile. "Let me guess, she called the comm room?"

"The council must be taking the crucible seriously. I'll see you downstairs," Liara said, understanding that Shepard needed a moment to gather herself.

She took that moment, running fingers through her mussed hair and trying to make herself presentable. Thankfully, none of her scars had decided to rear their ugly faces just yet. She thanked whoever was listening for small miracles and headed to meet with the councilor. The meeting ended with her agreeing to come to a private meeting on the Citadel to talk about Udina. The Salarian councilor had some concerns about humanity's representative that she wished to discuss in person.

She passed through security with a nod to the two women guarding the security of the universe. She'd finally learned their names were Bethany and Sarah. They waved back, happy to be noticed as they chatted about the vid someone had gotten of Kalros taking down the Reaper. Shepard made her way to the bridge to let Joker know they needed to get to the Citadel. When the doors slid open, she noticed that EDI was elsewhere and Garrus and Joker were exchanging military jokes between their species. She crossed her arms and leaned on the doorway to listen as the two boys talked playful smack. Neither of them had noticed she was even there. She finally chuckled as Garrus answered one of Joker's puns for him, How do you know when a Turian runs out of ammo? He switches to the stick up his butt as a backup weapon, and Garrus turned to regard her with a smile. Joker spun his chair around and squinted his eyes to read her mood before he started to talk. "Never thought I'd see the Krogan and the Turians team up. Even the Reapers have to be a little nervous about pissing them off."

Garrus shifted in his armor which for some reason he hadn't removed yet and cracked his neck, tugging the cowl to loosen it. He looked uncomfortable and intimidating all at once. "I'd say more than a little." His bravado made her insides clench and she bit her lip.

"I'm sorry about Mordin," Joker said with a sigh, putting it out there.

"He was a good man," Shepard agreed, moving to lean on the divider between Joker and EDI's stations.

"Yeah, he was always running those tests. One time, he tagged me in the middle of the night to ask how many livers humans had," Joker turned back to his console as Shepard snorted. "And this bump on my elbow. He said it was just a mild bone deformation, but I'm pretty sure he stuck a probe in there."

"Glad it was just your elbow," Shepard quipped, talking about Mordin making her feel a little better.

Garrus shot her an encouraging nod, obviously glad she was making jokes. "I always thought he was crazy. Useful, but crazy... Then he gives up his own life."

"Yeah, to save the Krogan," Joker pointed out with a puff of air. "Doesn't do much to disprove the crazy theory, huh?"

Garrus snorted. "I guess not. But he was one of ours."

"So now that we've got the Krogan and the Turians... what now?" Joker asked.

"The Krogan help us turn the tide on Palaven. They can shoot at something useful for a change," Garrus explained.

"Dig 'til we hit daylight, huh? Works for me."

Shepard followed Garrus from the bridge, when he tossed his head requesting her to do so. She could always hit up the galaxy map to plot their course. She was curious what Garrus had to say. The doors closed behind them and he asked, "So how does it feel knowing Krogan will be singing songs about you until the end of time? I'd think it would be an honor." Sarcasm dripped from his words and she grinned.

"There's enough misery in this universe. It's nice to see something go right for a change," she said. Even though Mordin hadn't survived, they had won a huge victory. There was no use in dwelling on what couldn't be changed. It was time for her to focus on those she could save.

"Can't say I've ever really witnessed history in the making like this. Well, except for Sovereign attacking the Citadel, and then there was the Collector base, but... this one felt good." He looked ashamed for saying it that way and she took his hand and squeezed it to let him know that she was on the same page. "And let's hope Wrex keeps running the show on Tuchanka. Maybe we should hire a food taster for him. Imagine the carnage if someone like that brother of his, Wreave, took over. "

"It could happen," she said, not wanting to think about those consequences.

"I know, its a chance we have to take, but I have to say, if it wasn't my own world that needed the help... I might've taken that Salarian deal."

She frowned, wondering if she could have done it herself if it hadn't been to help Wrex and Eve. What if Wreave had been in charge or if Eve had perished while Mordin synthesized the cure. She shook her head, the endless horrible possibilities too much to think about. "I could never bring myself to do that, no matter what I was offered."

"I admire your restraint, Shepard. It's nice when we can save the galaxy without destroying another race along the way." He pulled her into a hug, his mandibles mussing her hair as she tucked her head under his chin.

"Let's hope our luck holds." She let him comfort her and then pulled away to knock on his chest. "What are you still doing in this?"

He chuckled. "With everything that's happened since we got back, I haven't had a chance to settle in."

"Why don't you meet me upstairs in five minutes, and I'll help you get comfortable..." She clicked her nails over the metal chest plate.

A slow nod was his answer and she walked away to go to the galaxy map and plot their course for the Citadel

 


	32. Cerberus on the Citadel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The meeting with the Salarian Councilor is put on hold.

The approach to the Citadel was taking longer than usual. Shepard tapped her foot outside the airlock, impatiently waiting to get to the meeting with the Salarian councilor and see what the issue was. She finally turned to go into the cockpit and see what the hold up was. Joker was calling over the comm for docking permission, but was getting no answer. He began flitting his fingers over his console and said, "What the hell's going on down there? Even if there were a station malfunction, they'd have backups online. I got a bad feeling here... Checking emergency channels." His hands flashed over the screens discarding junk and pulling up a communication that she couldn't hear. "Hey, yeah this is Joker!...uh huh... yeah, no kidding... Commander, there's a communication from Thane. He says it's important. You'll wanna hear this..."

"Put him through," she agreed, leaning on his chair.

"Siha, the Citadel is under attack. Cerberus troops are everywhere and they're in control of the docks," Thane said breathlessly over the comm, his buzzing voice flooding the cockpit.

"Are you safe?" she asked, not ready to lose another friend so soon after Mordin.

"No," he said, without concern in his voice. He could handle himself... when he was healthy. His condition was worsening, she could hear it in the strain in his voice. "I had to evade their commandos at the hospital. I'm in a Presidium storefront."

"Did Kaidan make it out?" she asked another spike of fear shooting through her heart at the mention of the hospital.

"We got separated. He said he had to protect the Council. I'm going to C-Sec headquarters." Thane explained.

"Why C-Sec headquarters?"

"It's been compromised and C-Sec response depends on it. As long as Cerberus is holding the headquarters, they have the station," he explained again, making it clear where she had to go.

"Alright Joker. Get us away from the docks and close to C-Sec HQ. We'll deploy in the shuttle," she patted his chair and spun to get her armor. In the meantime, she called over the comm. "Change of plans. Garrus, Liara, meet me at the shuttle in full gear. Cerberus has the Citadel and we need to take it back."

* * *

 

Steve piloted the shuttle through some access tunnels that would drop them on C-Sec's front door. From what she had seen as they flew over the wards in the shuttle, it was all out war on the ground. Cerberus and C-Sec were engaged all over the Citadel. How had this happened? It was almost like Mars all over again. There had to be inside men. Cerberus had taken a shine to sleeper agents and that was extremely disconcerting.

Steve dropped them right out front of C-Sec where the fighting had gotten pretty thick. The air was hazy as both sides dropped smoke bombs to conceal their whereabouts. Shepard dropped out of the shuttle before Steve even landed, allowing him the best chance to get the hell out before they were noticed. Garrus and Liara dropped after her and she ran for cover. They started to pick off the Cerberus troops they could find and she caught her shields being peppered by one of the famous Cerberus turrets. She grumbled and tapped out her overload to get rid of the annoyance and while it charged Garrus sniped through the haze with his specially modded scope. Liara grabbed up as many of the troops as she could get her biotic hands on and tossed them as far as she could out of the fight, some landing with a sickening crunch as their armor failed to protect them enough. They pushed forward up the stairs to the door where, when the smoke cleared, they found Bailey sitting against the wall wounded by a gunshot to his side. He let them in and went immediately to the main console to set up C-Sec's secondary network to coordinate his people and get the station back under control. When Garrus questioned him about the councilors, he said they had split up. He found out that the Salarian councilor was supposed to be meeting with the executor in that very building, so Shepard decided to hunt her down, taking back the building as they went.

She got in contact with Thane who said he was on his way. There were dead C-Sec agents everywhere, lending credence to Shepard's inside source theory. She shuddered as they found no one alive except Cerberus troops all throughout the building. Things were looking grim as they entered the executor's office and found him and two Salarian bodyguards dead. Shepard cursed as Bailey told her not to discount the Salarian councilor if they hadn't found a body. Garrus peered out the large window of the executor's office, over looking a set of cubicles. His visor was whipping through readings at a mile a minute and she stepped over to join him. He cocked his head downward, indicating she should look for herself. She stared, squinting and watching her own visor's readings. She couldn't make sense of them, so she shut it off and used her own two eyes. Below, one of the chairs rolled away from the desk it was posted at, seemingly of it's own accord. Then out of nowhere, the Salarian councilor appeared out from under a tactical cloak. Shepard sighed with relief and informed Bailey as Garrus backed away from the window. She glanced back down and she growled in anger as she saw the councilor backing away from a new threat. A muscular man with black hair, wearing a visor and Cerberus tactical gear held his palm out towards the Councilor. His palm glowed with some kind of technology. The urgency boiling up inside her, Shepard pulled her pistol and shot out the glass of the window so she could vault over the sill and down to protect the councilor. She landed on her feet and recovered quickly to aim her pistol at the threat. "Don't even think about it," she growled as the Asian man grinned from behind the slotted visor.

They circled each other, the councilor between them. Shepard narrowed her eyes as the councilor said, "Shepard, he's going to kill us all."

"That remains to be seen," she said with confidence.

"No, I meant Udina. He's staging a coup as we speak, luring the other councilors into a trap." she hissed as the man continued to threaten her with his flashy tech.

Shepard felt Liara and Garrus join her at her back and without taking her eyes off the threat she said, "Three against one, pal. It's over."

"No," the man said in a gravely voice a smirk tipping his lips. "Now, it's fun."

Before he could set off his tech, Thane appeared behind him like the wind blew him into existence. His pistol was pressed to the shaggy black half up half down hair on the assassin's head. Shepard took a second to realize how silly the style was for an assassin, before he spun and knocked Thane's hand away. Thane's gun was holstered and they began to exchange blows like magic. Their limbs moved quickly, blurring in the air around them. Shepard moved the councilor behind her and watched as the professionals duked it out. The Cerberus assassin grabbed Thane and rolled him onto the floor. A move which Thane recovered from so quickly she barely even saw him hit the ground. His pistol was out and he fired at thin air as the assassin disappeared.

The room was tense as everyone tried to spot him. He finally reappeared to Thane's left, drawing a sword. Thane shot round after round at him, but he was so fast he easily outmaneuvered the pistol and reengaged Thane in hand to hand. Thane blocked the sword as it swung over his head, whistling through the air before it connected with the side of his pistol. He countered with an elbow and kick to the face in quick succession, his movements fluid, a final blow with a biotic punch knocked the assassin across the room and onto his back. Thane picked up the dropped pistol and popped the heat sink as the assassin jumped back to his feet in a classic kick up and regained his sword. Thane charged the assassin, shooting as he went, each of the bullets deflected by the assassin's shield. He leapt into the air and came down to punch the assassin again, but faster than light, the sword was up. "Thane!" Shepard shouted as the blade appeared out of Thane's back. She ran to her friend as the assassin pulled his blade back and fled. Instead of stopping to help Thane who was dragging himself to his feet as blood pooled beneath him, she gave chase. She fired uselessly at the assassin as he hopped off the edge of the building onto a waiting skycar and it flew off. Thane was right behind her, clutching his chest and firing his own pistol. He stopped shooting as the skycar disappeared and slid down against the wall, leaving a bright red trail behind him. "How bad is it?" she asked desperately as she ran over to him, pressing her palms to the wound.

"I have time, catch him," Thane insisted, brushing her hands away and cringing.

"Shepard, what's going on up there?" her omnitool hummed with Bailey's voice.

"Thane needs medical help, fast.. and I need to take care of an assassin," she relayed as Thane shooed her away again.

"He must be going after the rest of the council," Bailey concluded.

"Get the word out. Udina's trying to seize power," she told him, heading for a C-Sec car that was parked nearby. "I've got to get to the councilors."

Garrus and Liara joined her as the Salarian councilor tended to Thane. Garrus glancing between her and Thane with regret in his eyes. He already knew she would blame herself if Thane died. She needed to set her priorities and right then, she couldn't put Thane's life over the council's. She hopped in the skycar and they took off. "They're being taken to a shuttle pad on the Presidium," Bailey informed her. "Start driving, I'll try to raise them on the comm." She headed in the direction that the assassin had gone and Bailey came back over her omnitool. "I've got a fix on the council's position. I'm sending it to your car."

"Good work, Bailey. We're almost there." They zipped along the normally crowded air space of the Citadel where there now were no cars flying. It was eerily quiet without the hustle and bustle. They passed under one of the support beams that connected the arms and out of nowhere, the assassin landed on the hood of the car. He must have been waiting for them. Her face twisted in anger and she glanced at Garrus in the seat beside her to let him know she was about to do something stupid. She pulled her pistol and shot through her own windshield in an attempt to hit the assassin. He hopped lithely up the car, balancing impossibly easily on the speeding vehicle. The glass splintered and cracked but did not shatter. She abandoned the controls and kicked her door open to lean out the side and shoot at him some more. Garrus slid over to the drivers seat and took the controls as she hovered just shy of too far out of the car, shooting at the asshole who had stabbed Thane. Her bullets all bounced harmlessly away as he threw up a biotic barrier around him. When her clip overheated, he raised his sword, impossibly clean after having slipped through her friend like he was made of butter and stabbed down into the control center of the car. Sparks flew and the car caught fire. She glared at him one last time as he stood and hopped into another car piloted by a female Cerberus troop. Garrus grabbed her around the waist and pulled her back in the car and shut the door as the alarms glared noisily around them.

They braced themselves for the impact as the car careened downwards, losing momentum due to it's fried circuits. It smashed into a shop on the Presidium and Shepard thanked whoever was listening that there hadn't been any civilians in the shop. She kicked the door open again and climbed out, stumbling as she gained her footing on the torn up concrete. "You alright?" Garrus asked, a streak of his own blood dripping from his forehead.

"I'm fine... you?" she asked, reaching up to touch the blood as it slid down his face.

"Just a flesh wound," he assured her as Liara climbed out of the back of the car.

"Liara?" Shepard asked.

"I'm fine," she said breathlessly.

"Shepard, my instruments say your car's stopped," Bailey shouted, panicked over her omnitool.

"I'm on foot now," she grumbled. "Any luck contacting the council?"

"Negative. Their guards are dead, but we've still got vital signs on the council's transponders," he muttered.

"Where are they going?" she asked.

"A shuttle pad above Shaelmar plaza. Udina's with them. If he can get them in range of that assassin, this is all over," Bailey warned.

"On my way," she agreed, already walking toward Shaelmar plaza. Garrus slightly in the lead as the one who knew his way around the Citadel better than she ever would. As they moved through the chaos in the streets, she nearly had a heart attack when out of nowhere a Cerberus troop clad in thin armor appeared out of nowhere like a Phantom and missed lobbing off Garrus' head by centimeters. She heard the sword connect with his shields, slicing through them as he jumped back, his arms pinwheeling. She unleashed the biotics that had flared with her fear and the woman was knocked back into the glass of a shop window. She smashed through the reinforced window and fell inside, twitching as she bled out from the shard of glass in her throat. "Jesus," Shepard fussed as she ran to Garrus's side. There was a thin line on his neck where the sword had made contact, the blue blood dripping. He hissed when she touched it and she scoffed as he tried to push her away. "Like you're not always fussing over me. Move your hand. Lemme see."

She fished in her belt pouches for her supply of dextro medigel and gently applied some to the seeping wound. He purred thankfully at the attention, then said, "We need to get to the council."

She nodded with one last caress to his mandible and turned to continue on ahead. She subconsciously put herself in the lead again, not wanting to risk him to the Phantoms should there be more ahead. Liara was almost taken down by one of the snipers like they'd seen on Eden Prime that had made Shepard's shields look like tissue paper. As soon as Garrus saw the red laser sight, he shoved her down and took his own shot at the threat, his Widow ripping through the enemy's shield. Two could play that game. The way to the plaza was cluttered with Cerberus and they even had an Atlas to deal with before they got to the elevators where the council was being led to their doom.

Bailey got them a ride on the top of an elevator so they could catch up with the Assassin as Bailey made his elevator stop on every floor. As their elevator reached the assassin's, Shepard overloaded the power nodes on the top and it stopped completely, jerking to a halt as theirs continued to sail upwards. They fought in the close quarters of the shaft as Cerberus realized they were not in an elevator but on one. They finally caught up with the council's elevator and Shepard jumped across the abyss to land on top so she could get in and do some good. Before she could pry open the hatch on the roof, she heard muffled voices below and then shots were fired up through the roof. She dodged and rolled, wondering which of the council was packing heat. The elevator suddenly stopped and she grabbed hold of the handle of the hatch to stay on. "Shit," she cursed and ripped open the hatch angrily as soon as she caught her balance in a crouch.

She dropped into the abandoned elevator and out into the building, Garrus and Liara on her heels. "Cerberus took out the shuttle! Everyone back to the elevator, move!" Kaidan shouted as she laid eyes on him in full armor and staring hopelessly at the shuttle that was supposed to be the saving grace of the council. The shuttle was smashed and on fire. She led her people out onto the roof and Liara closed the doors behind them as Kaidan spun to try and salvage the situation. When he saw her, his features sunk and he raised his pistol. So he had been the one shooting at her. Dammit, didn't he realize she was there to help? Of course he thought she was behind all of this. Why had she thought a few words would make him believe she had washed her hands of Cerberus? Stupid, Shepard. They drew down on each other and he narrowed his eyes. "Shepard, what's going on?" he asked smoothly.

"Shepard's blocking our escape. She's with Cerberus," Udina accused, drawing her wrath onto him. The bastard was playing Kaidan well.

"Just hang on. I got this," Kaidan said, his gun still pointed at them, but his attention not quite so focused. "Everyone calm down."

She lowered her own gun, Liara and Garrus still aiming at Kaidan. Her heart was in her throat. "I can explain this, Kaidan."

"Come on, Shepard. Gun drawn on a councilor? Kinda looks bad," he said softly, at least willing to hear her out it seemed.

She stood up from her aiming stance and held her arm up, looking from Liara to Garrus for them to lower their weapons. "We don't have time to negotiate. You've been fooled... all of you. Udina's behind this attack. The Salarian councilor confirmed it."

"Please," Udina scoffed trying to cover his ass as Shepard stared him down casually, her gun limp in her hands in a show of cooperation to Kaidan. She trusted her friend to make the right choice. He was smart. He would figure it out. "You have no proof. You never do."

"There are Cerberus soldiers in the elevator shaft behind us, if you open that door, they'll kill you all," she explained calmly.

"What Shepard says is possible. Unlikely, but possible," The Asari councilor stepped forward in her defense.

"We don't have time to debate this," Udina growled, turning to go toward the console that would unlock the door behind Shepard. "We're dead if we stay out here. I'm overriding the lock."

Shepard raised her pistol again and stepped forward, getting in Kaidan's face. His eyes narrowed as she pointed around him at Udina. With a sigh he said, "I'd better not regret this."

He stepped back from her and turned to train his own gun on Udina. "You won't," she assured him, stepping up beside him, the relief washing over her as Garrus' warning growls ceased. If she had refused to shoot Kaidan, she had no delusions that Garrus would have done it in her defense.

"Udina, step away from the console," Kaidan warned.

"To hell with this!" Udina shouted, refusing to move. The lock on the door began to flicker and Garrus turned to aim at the door in case it opened.

Shepard hissed and pointed her gun to the air as the Asari councilor stepped up next to Udina and tried to bodily move him away. He shoved her down and she hit the ground. Shepard glanced back up and saw Udina had a pistol of his own aimed right at the Asari. "He's got a gun!" Kaidan shouted and Shepard's gun was pointed and discharged before he could even react further.

Udina fell, his pistol dropping from his hands as he bled out from the bullet that she'd put straight through his heart. "Get the council back and cover that door," she said to Kaidan, holstering her pistol and moving to put herself between the door and the remaining councilors. She angrily kicked the gun from Udina's reach. Even if he was dead, she wasn't taking chances.

"The door!" the Turian councilor pointed, as someone began to melt through the door.

Shepard moved forward and pulled her gun back out, ready to defend the councilors. It felt good to have Kaidan at her side again as the four of them circled the door. When it came open, she aimed at the air. "Bailey?" she said in shock.

He nodded and holstered the pistol he'd had pointed at her. "Made it as fast as we could, Shepard. Looks like you uh... took care of things," he mumbled glancing around her and seeing Udina's body sprawled on the roof, the blood spreading around the bullet wound to ruin his cream colored dress shirt.

"Then it's true, we were in danger," the Asari councilor said softly. "But I don't understand. You said that Cerberus was right here."

"Cerberus was right here, but they beet feet into the Keeper tunnels when they figured out we were coming," Bailey confirmed indicating himself and the small group of C-Sec officers at his back. "Sorry Councilor, I'll say it plain. Shepard just saved the lot of you."

"Then I owe you Shepard," the Turian councilor said offering his hand. "For our lives and for brokering a deal with the Primarch and the Krogan that I never could."

"You don't owe me anything, Councilor. Times like this, we all stand together," she scoffed, waving a hand at the honor he was trying to heap on her.

"Shepard, do you have any idea why Cerberus would do this?" he asked her.

"Honestly, no," she answered as best she could. "But I plan to find out."

"Alright people, principals are evacuated. We got a tunnel and a million more places to secure. Move it," Bailey ordered. His people took the Council in hand and they left Shepard barely standing on shaky legs. Her heart was still racing. What would she have done if Kaidan hadn't seen reason? She jumped when Garrus took her hand and squeezed it to stop it from shaking, then she looked at him gratefully.

* * *

 

They returned to the Normandy which docked in it's usual place after everything was taken care of. Shepard changed and then went to see Bailey and make sure there was nothing more she could do. He informed her that she should probably go see Thane.

That was how she found herself standing in another hospital room while a fit of coughing wracked his body. She cringed as he chuckled. "That assassin should be ashamed. He allowed a terminally ill Drell to keep him from his target."

"I'll put the word out," she said, a wry chuckle of her own escaping through the tears. Any other person on any other day could have survived the wound he'd taken, but with his weakened body, they couldn't replace his blood fast enough. His son Kolyat stood stoic beside his bed on the opposite side, watching his father slip away.

Thane began to pray, asking for forgiveness as he had so many times before after taking a life when he'd been with her. Half way through, another coughing fit wracked through him and Shepard grabbed his free hand and he gripped hers gratefully as Kolyat picked up the prayer. "Kolyat, you speak as the priests do," Thane whispered with pride. "You've been spending time with them."

His son nodded and moved around the bed to join her. "I brought a prayer book. Would you like to join me, Commander Shepard?" She nodded, the tears still flowing freely down her cheeks. "Kalahira," he began. "This one's heart is pure, but beset by wickedness and contention."

She glanced down at the prayers, picking up where he left off. "Guide this one to where the traveler never tires, the lover never leaves and the hungry never starve. Guide this one, Kalahira and she will be a companion to you as she was to me." Her words choked off as Thane turned his head and gazed longingly out the windows at the life outside. He passed gently, the only indication the soft hum of the monitors as his heart stopped. She reached up and closed his eyes gently, her cheeks soggy. She thought for a moment as she noticed the smile on his lips before his features relaxed into those of the dead. She still clutched his hand as it slackened in her grip. "Kolyat," she whispered. "Why did the last verse say 'she'?"

"The prayer was not for him, Commander. He has already asked forgiveness for the lives he has taken." Kolyat's hand landed gently on her shoulder and she drew her gaze from Thane to look at him. His black eyes, so like his father's blinked twice, once vertical once horizontal, and he smiled at her. "His wish was for you."

She nodded, not trusting her voice until she swallowed and glanced back at her friend. "Goodbye, Thane. You won't be alone long." She didn't know what made her say it that way, but something told her that not all of them were going to survive this war. Her heart clenched, as she thought of Garrus and what might happen to him if she didn't live. Leaving him alone in the universe hurt her more than the thought of actually dying. Hell, she'd already done that before. That was the easy part.

She backed out of the room, leaving Kolyat to mourn his father in peace, thankful that she had been part of bringing the estranged couple back together so they could have some semblance of a relationship before the end. With her hands stuffed in her hoodie pockets, she found herself wandering down to the refugee docks. The memorial wall stood like a beacon of sadness, just beyond the scanners. She shuffled up to glance over some of the trinkets left behind by loved ones, wishing she had something to leave for Mordin and Thane. People all around were crying and she looked around, realizing she still had tears on her own cheeks. She brushed them aside and spotted Steve, standing proudly in front of the wall, clutching the recording of him and his husband's conversation. She wandered over to his side and made her presence known. "Are you okay?" she asked.

"I've just been standing here, holding this for I don't know how long..." He lifted the recording, caressing over the top of it with his opposite hand. "He'll always be a part of me."

"Your past is yours," she assured him. "No one can take that away."

He stepped away, toward the small ledge near the middle of the wall. He pressed the play button to hear Robert's voice one last time before placing it reverently between a small bouquet of flowers and a lit candle. "Goodbye, Robert," he whispered softly, his fingers lingering on the metal of the memory chip. She moved up to turn him toward her with a touch on his shoulder. He turned into her hug and she let him sigh deeply and hug her just a bit too tight before he pulled away and offered her a bitter smile. "I'm glad you came," he said as thanks for giving him the strength to move on and get his life back.

She stood there a few more minutes, sharing in the grief and accepting Thane's passing. He had been a good friend. She had had so many nights in his little space in the Life Support room where she just sat across the table from him sipping her coffee while he drank tea and listening to the barely there hum of the engines in a comfortable silence. They had talked occasionally, but besides him revealing the few closely guarded secrets of his family, they were much more comfortable just sharing the quiet. It was something she didn't get much of and it was nice sometimes. She sighed, hugging herself and finally made her way back to the Normandy.

In the entryway just before the airlock, she found Kaidan waiting for her, out of his armor and back in his uniform. He stood with his hips cocked, oozing a certain amount of swagger, his arms crossed and an unsure grin on his face. "Kaidan, hey," she said softly. "I wondered where you went. What's up?"

He was looking so much better since the last time she'd seen him. It had been weeks since they'd talked about where they stood. His face was clear of bruises and he stood watching her with his eyes slightly narrowed as he judged her mood. "I'm trying to wrap my head around what just happened."

"You sound angry," she pointed out sadly, recognizing the tone he used to take whenever he was getting ready to question an order because he thought she was being reckless.

"Not angry," he sighed pushing away from the wall and uncrossing his arms. "Just not everyday you have an armed standoff with someone you loved." She fidgeted at the proximity as he dropped that word on her. "How it all went down, it's got me... I don't know." he began pacing, relieving her of the awkwardness of his presence in her personal space.

"Okay, talk to me. Let's have it." she said crossing her own arms to put that small barrier between them.

"If I hadn't backed down first, I feel like you would have taken me out," he admitted with a shrug, his smile sheepish.

"I trusted you," she added her own shrug. "I knew you'd come around. That's all that matters. Main thing is we stopped the coup and Cerberus is off the Citadel."

"But sometimes the way a thing goes down does matter, Shepard. Later when you have to live with yourself." He said moving to stare out the window at the gleaming side of the Normandy as it shone in the artificial sun of the Citadel dawn. "Knowing that you acted with integrity. Then it matters."

"You're talking about, Udina," she guessed. "He gave me no choice so I took the shot," she sighed. "Any soldier would have done the same... Including you."

He huffed, the sound coming out more like a disgusted chuckle as he realized she was right. "Okay... Look, Shepard, there's uh... There's another reason I'm here." He began pacing again. "Hackett offered me a position, but I'd turn it down in a second if there was a chance to join you on the Normandy again."

She smiled, surprised to find the gesture was genuine. "Can't imagine meeting the Reapers without you."

He chuckled, for real this time. "Thank you, Commander. " He held out his hand and she took it happily. "And I need you to know that I'll never doubt you again. I've got your back." She was glad that he would be back with them. Having him on the team would be a huge asset. "I hope having two SPECTREs on one ship isn't some breach of protocol."

She snorted at his joke. "Since when has anyone on the Normandy ever followed protocol? I guess that means you accepted the position..."

"Yeah, just before I was released from the hospital. I meant to tell you..."

"No worries. Congratulations, SPECTRE Alenko," She said with a grin.

"Here's hoping I can live up to the bar you set. It's pretty high."

"Stop, you'll make me blush," she nudged him gently and they stepped into the airlock together. As the decontamination began it's cycle, she became painfully aware of just how alone they were. "Listen..." she began.

He held up a hand to stop her. "If this is about Garrus, I understand, Shepard... I do... You were always close. I'm not going to ruin a good thing by being petty." She sighed deeply with relief and he continued. "I've seen you two in action together and I know you're in good hands. That's good enough for me."

"Thank you, Kaidan," she said offering him a friendly hug as the decontamination finished it's cycle. They left the airlock and she walked with him to the elevator. "Did you need a tour of the new Normandy? I know you didn't get to see much of it the last time you were on board."

"I think I can find my way," he assured her with a grin. "So long as I can find the mess, I think I'm good." She hit the third floor button when they stepped onto the elevator, hoping to find Garrus for a shoulder to cry on about Thane. He was the only one on her current crew who had known Thane, outside of Dr. Chakwas.

They rode together in silence, her hands shoved back in her hoodie pockets. She tucked her hair behind her ears as she lowered her head. When the elevator stopped and they were deposited on the crew deck she was surprised to see Garrus standing in front of the memorial wall. He turned and his face showed mild shock when he saw Kaidan standing beside her. She smiled up at him and stepped forward to nuzzle her forehead to his. Kaidan stepped off the elevator behind her and she gave him a short nod. "The mess is around the corner. Just like old times."

"Thanks, Shepard," he said with a soft smile. As Garrus carefully put his arm around her waist, scenting her sadness, but unsure of how to act around Kaidan after the display she'd already put on, Kaidan glanced at the memorial wall and found Ashley's name printed near the top. "That list is surprisingly short so far," he commented before touching her name with his fingers then turning to leave them alone. If them being together bothered him, he wasn't showing it. Maybe he had found the strength to move on.

Once he was out of earshot, Garrus hummed. "Hell of a day," he mused. "Udina loses his mind, the Citadel almost falls and you almost had to put down a friend."

"Got a little tense there," she agreed, hating having to relive it.

"If it had come down to it... Could you have pulled the trigger?" he asked turning her face to his to read her reaction.

"I don't see how," she said honestly. "We start killing our friends and war turns into murder."

"But it doesn't always give us the easy way out, does it?" he asked. She could feel his tension. She knew she had read him right. He was feeling bad that he would have been able to pull the trigger on Kaidan to save her. She leaned into him and sighed. "At least Kaidan didn't have to join Ash."

"Let's hope she's looking out for us," she agreed. She took a moment to steel herself before giving him the news. "Thane too."

He hugged her tighter. "I'm sorry, Shepard. At least he went out fighting."

She nodded, more tears escaping her eyes before she could swallow them. "I think I need a stiff drink. You still got that bottle?"

He nudged her and smiled warmly. "Of course. I'll meet you upstairs."

* * *

 

Shepard was pleasantly numb. The amino neutral booze Garrus had gotten them was smooth going down and it tasted like honey. She sat with her vision swimming as she stared at the ceiling. She was stroking one hand through his fringe as he rested his head in her lap and carefully painted the nails on her other hand. "We really need to find another drunken hobby," she chuckled as he finished her pinky and blew gently on the wet polish.

"You're just lucky I can still see straight," he murmured, the buzz of his voice thrumming up her body. She sighed and shifted her weight so he could be more comfortable. He nuzzled his head into her thigh and beckoned her to hand him her other fingers. She obliged, spreading her thin fingers out to rest on his outstretched palm. He gripped her hands gently in his talons and hummed contentedly as he set to work.

"You ever think about the future?" she asked.

Hmm," he rumbled deeply, not skipping a beat on her nails. "I try not to. A good Turian lives in the present because he knows that he might be dead tomorrow."

She snorted, "We both know you're a terrible Turian."

"True enough," he agreed. He let her question fall on the air, not giving her a straight answer.

She sighed, resting the finished hand on his chest. "I don't want to lose anyone else," she admitted.

"So you won't," he said, turning his head so his fringe bumped her other thigh. He glanced up at her, his usual confidence in her back in full swing.

"You know I almost believe you," she said smiling down at him.

"You should," he said, his mandibles clicking as he turned away from her to resume painting her nails. "I'm always right."

* * *

 

Shepard's coffee maker buzzed, jarring her from sleep. She and Garrus were huddled together in the bend of her couch. The empty bottle of blue hooch had been knocked to the floor and her glass was tipped over next to his on the coffee table. When she attempted to sit up, she found herself locked in his arms as he nuzzled the back of her head. "Stay here," he rumbled.

"I really want to," she sighed, his voice driving home her desire as it touched every nerve ending left exposed by her still buzzing body. "God, do I want to."

"Then call shore leave. The Reapers can wait one day," he coaxed, his hand slipping up under her shirt to gently squeeze her breast.

"That's not fair," she muttered, as his mandibles caressed gently over her neck just below her ear.

"Archangel doesn't play fair," he reminded her, adding an extra hum to his voice.

Goose flesh stood up along her neck and cascaded deeper to draw a gasp from her throat as he pressed against her. She could tell his plates were already opened and ready for her. "Is this how Turians wake up after a bender?" she chuckled, trying to breath around her arousal. It was hard to think with him breathing on her neck and fluttering his mandibles exactly where he knew she liked it.

He hugged her closer, purring in her ear, "Only if there is a beautiful red head waiting in the bed beside them," he joked.

She rolled to face him, barely able to stay on the couch in the limited space. His hand under her shirt caressed over her side then up to hold her in place as she pressed her lips to his. The kiss was nice, their tongues mingling with less urgency than she was used to. It was nice to take a moment and just enjoy being with him. After all of the close calls they'd been through lately, she needed the change of pace. He seemed to understand that as they took everything slowly.

She laid in his arms after they'd finished, lazily lacing their odd number of fingers together and smiling. "You smell nice," he said burying his face in her hair.

"As opposed to how I normally smell?" she asked jokingly.

He chuckled, her hair puffing forward at the release of air from his mouth. "No. I just meant that lately, there has been a lot of worry and fear under your skin. It really doesn't mix with your body chemistry."

She nudged an elbow into his chest. "You're saying I stink..." she teased.

"Well, maybe a little," he grinned his subvocals teasing her right back.

"Well, I shall endeavor to smell less offensive," she said.

"Oh you could never smell offensive. Not with your pheromone levels. You're really not subtle in anything you do, Shepard."

 


	33. Into The Deep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard is introduced to a new potential ally that just might be more terrifying than the Reapers themselves.

 

Take the day off. That's what she was supposed to do. Instead she wandered the Presidium, doing random favors for strangers. It made her feel like she was helping every time she received an email from someone whom she'd assisted. Many of them, if they had the resources, pledged themselves to the cause after receiving her help. She was even able to get in touch with Zaeed after tracking the Volus ambassador to an apartment on the Presidium after receiving a tip that he was involved with Cerberus. Zaeed wouldn't join her on the Normandy, but he had contacts that he could get into the fight. She admitted that she missed listening to his stories late at night while he reverently cleaned his gun.

She felt disheveled and messy by the time her omnitool alerted her that she had messages to read. She was passing through security at the refugee camp and saw that Garrus had asked to see her. She smiled and took the elevator back to the Normandy dock where he said he was waiting.

As soon as she stepped off the elevator, she saw him leaning on the skycar rental kiosk looking calm and collected. He hadn't seen her yet and she took a moment to take him in. All 6'8 of him was the picture of suave. She bit her lip and stared before he turned his head to her. The false sun caught on his fringe, lighting up the metallic flecks in his skin and her breath caught. He smiled at her. "Shepard, glad you came." As his eyes flicked over her from top to bottom she saw the concern wash over his face. "I knew you weren't going to relax today, so I took matters into my own hands."

"What'd you have in mind?" she asked, her hands tucked in her hoodie pockets as she approached him.

"Something that doesn't involve fighting Reapers," he alluded with no hint as to what he actually had planned.

"That's hard to find these days. I guess we could catch a Hanar poetry reading," she quipped tossing a thumb over her shoulder and smiling.

He chuckled. "No offense, but if the end of the galaxy is coming, I'm not going out on the phrase, 'this one feels like a flower'."

"So?" she asked shrugging as he threw a dramatic backhand to his forehead and swooned.

"So... I had an idea." He turned away from her to activate the skycar and the doors popped open. He shot her a grin over his shoulder and she smiled back heading for the car. He got in the driver's seat and deftly piloted the car away from the dock and up.

She watched the other cars zip by going every which way, everyone in a hurry. Garrus took his time, barely flying fast enough to keep them afloat. He hummed casually, his demeanor contented. She liked seeing him like this. As if he didn't have a care in the world. She had a perfect view of the scars on his face. She didn't think she would recognize him without them. When they had been fresh, they had been a reminder of how she had failed him. Now, they were a part of him. A part that she knew made him who he was. He had suffered and had come out of it stronger. He glanced over at her, catching her staring and his mandibles twitched outward at her attention. "Where are we going?" she asked coyly as the Citadel created a backdrop of lights, the day cycle close to ending.

"Somewhere we're not supposed to," he said, without any more hint.

"Now you're talkin'." Some things never changed. It was a comfort knowing that they could still get in trouble together even when war wasn't involved.

"Ever have that one thing you always wanted to do before you died, Shepard?" he asked.

In lieu of the conversation taking a turn for the serious, she decided to tease him. "I've woken up with a Turian next to me..."

He snorted. "Still trying to make me blush, huh?"

She nodded, smiling. "Until it works. So what's your one thing?"

"The whole time I worked at C-Sec, I would stare up at the top of the Presidium and say to myself, 'I want to go up there'." He paused, a happy memory reaching his eyes as he looked up through the glass of the windshield at the building in question looming ahead. "But I never did. There were 137 regulations telling me I couldn't."

She snorted, enjoying this side of him. A little peek into what made him tick. "So you got them changed?" she teased.

"No. Now, I just don't give a damn." He guided the car up onto a ledge that crossed from one side of the Presidium to the next and set it down gently. When he cracked open the doors and got out, he immediately stepped toward the edge to take in the view. "Figured it's time to do something stupid just for the hell of it. Might be the last chance we ever get." He grinned at her over his shoulder as she got out of the car.

The view was magnificent. You could see the entire Citadel from where they were standing. Skycars flew by below their feet, oblivious to them watching. Wind tossed her hair back, and she marveled at the fact that they were so high up that there actually was wind on the Citadel. "It's incredible." She sighed, watching the station's lights slowly winking on in the distance.

There was still enough light shining for her to catch a glimpse of his sparkling skin before meeting his happy eyes. He was watching her with awe, the beautiful view of the Citadel disregarded. She flushed, his attention still making her feel like she didn't deserve it. "I'd be lying if I said I didn't hope it would inspire a certain... mood." He moved in close to her, the warmth from his body blocking the chill from the wind.

"Something on your mind?" she asked with a grin, flattening her palms on his chest as he cocked his head to look down at her, the light shifting on his plates. The view of the Citadel was nothing compared to his shining skin.

He sighed. "It seemed like you needed time to... figure us out," he confessed. Had she been that standoffish lately? Was he doubting how she felt? He placed a hand on her hips and tipped her chin up to look him in the eyes. "Are you ready to be a one-Turian kind of woman?"

Her hands on his chest slid up and gripped his shoulders, the thought of being without him, ever, making her stomach clench. She'd said it before under the influence and in the heat of battle, but now her head was clear and so was her heart. She locked their gazes. "The _only_ thing that made leaving Earth bearable was knowing you were out there somewhere."

"I felt the same way," he sighed. "The worst part about the galaxy going to hell would've been never getting to see you again." Her hands were squeezing his shoulders now, she couldn't let go, without letting him know exactly how she felt.

"Well, here I am. Exactly where I want to be." She paused and have him a gentle shake to drive her point home. "I love you, Garrus Vakarian."

His chest rumbled with what she recognized as happiness. The hand he'd had supporting her chin lifted to scratch his forehead plates. "Wow, the vids Joker gave me... well, they never got this far." He chuckled, she could hear the nerves riding his voice. "There was the part about sleeping together... but this... I don't know exactly what to do..." His mandibles flicked nervously.

She used her leverage on his shoulders to pull him close enough so she could kiss his lips. After they'd shared a tender kiss, she pulled away and caressed his scarred mandible. "Who needs a vid when you've got me?"

He grabbed her around the waist and tipped her in a classic sweep off your feet move and his mandibles parted in a goofy grin before he pressed his lips to hers. She chuckled around the silly kiss, but she had never been happier to be surrounded by so much cheesiness. He may have been awkward when it came to human romance, but he was hers and she loved him and nothing was going to take him from her.

When he picked her back up and set her on her feet, the air slightly gone from her lungs, he chuckled as well. With a lingering caress on her upper arm, he turned from her and bent over. She glanced around him to see a picnic basket, two rifles and a collection of old liquor bottles full of water. She lifted an eyebrow and crossed her arms as he picked up one of the rifles and one of the bottles. "Now, before we head back, there is one thing we are going to settle once and for all." He turned and peered at her out of the tops of his eyes. "Not saying you don't know how to handle a gun... just saying some of us know how to make it dance." He tossed the heavy sniper rifle to her and she caught it awkwardly, the weight of the weapon and it's long balance not something she was used to. She was a pistol and shotgun kind of girl. "So let's find out who's really the best shot." He held up the glass bottle with a devious grin.

"There are a few people in the galaxy who have seen me in action, Big Guy. They seemed impressed," she said with more confidence than she felt, cradling the weapon in the crook of her arms to balance the weight.

"Yeah, but _I've_ actually seen you dance, Shepard. No comment," he teased.

"Alright, Vakarian. You're going down." She adjusted the scope on the rifle and turned to face away from the wind. Hefting the heavy weapon, she sighted quickly to get a feel for the scope and waited as he backed up.

"Don't worry. I loaded it with practice slugs for when you miss," he said wheeling his arm back to throw the bottle as high and as far as he could. She caught the bottle in her sights and it exploded with the force of the bullet. That was one for her. "That was an easy one. Let you build up your confidence." She set the gun down, shaking her head as he picked up another bottle and his own rifle. She was surprised to see he hadn't brought the Black Widow. He actually was curious if she was better than him. "Long range, I wrote the book. Nobody alive can do this, not even Commander Shepard." He tossed the bottle to her and she caught it, testing its weight. "Give me a tough one." She backed up and took a running start to throw farther. She needn't have bothered because almost as soon as it left her hands, he'd shot it out of the sky. The pieces rained down toward the pool of water below on the Presidium. She watched them fall, impressed at how quickly he'd scoped and dropped the bottle. He snorted. "I said a tough one." He mocked.

She picked up her own rifle again as he picked up another bottle, abandoning his rifle. "Step aside," she taunted, knowing she was going to miss this shot. She didn't need a competition to know he was better than her. As he tossed the bottle from one hand to the other, she settled into the weight of the gun again. "Do it," she said.

The bottle flew out in front of her and she shot wide. The rubber bullet missed and the bottle fell, still intact, downwards to splash in the Presidium pool. He let out a triumphant whoop and threw his arms in the air, shouting, "I'm Garrus Vakarian and this is now my favorite spot on the Citadel."

She dropped her arms, doing her best to look insulted and defeated. "Hey, it's windy up here."

He chuckled softly and walked up beside her to wrap an arm around her waist. "There, there. It's okay.... I know there are _other_ things you're good at."

She couldn't help the silly smile that spread her lips as she gazed up at his teasing expression. She rested her head on his shoulder and they watched as the day cycle slipped away, the Citadel lit up with it's nightlife. Even after Cerberus tried to take it over, the station still buzzed with life. People went about their days as if nothing had happened.

He patted her back lightly and said, "Are you hungry?"

"I could eat," she agreed.

He moved to the picnic basket and knelt down to rummage through the contents. "I asked Traynor for some tips on how to prepare a human dish. She helped me make something that she called 'mac and cheese' and then boiled processed meat that was shaped a bit suspiciously for my tastes. The water after she was finished smelled... odd and it... lingered... she called it a 'hot dog'."

He pulled a plastic container with a red lid from the basket and shrugged as he handed it to her. She took it gratefully. "Starting easy. I like it. You can't mess up hot dogs." His mandibles spread at the praise as he pulled out a container of his own, the blue lid distinguishing his dextro food from hers. She settled down on the ground, her legs dangling over the edge of the Presidium. He sat beside her as she opened the lid and vigorously dug her fork into the macaroni. He watched her eat for a moment before prodding at his own heavily meat based food. "After we eat, how about a dive in the pool," she joked.

He leaned forward to stare down into the water below. "You obviously haven't seen Turians swim. It's a lot of flailing and splashing, interrupted by occasional bouts of drowning."

"Yeah you're right. I'd just have to save your ass again," she teased, nudging him with her shoulder.

"It'd make up for all the times I've pulled your ass out of the fire. Noveria, Feros, Ilos... We've had a hell of a ride, haven't we, Shepard?"

"I think that ride's been rough on you, Garrus. You get a new scar every time I see you. Loosing a step there in your old age?"

He lifted his arm, his two pronged fork held daintily between his thumb and middle finger. "Raise your hand if you haven't been killed before."

"Touche," she conceded and dropped her own fork into what was left of her macaroni. She pulled her legs up to fold them up underneath her and sighed, leaning against him to rid herself of the chill in the air. "Whatever happens, it's you and me."

"Shepard and Vakarian, taking on the galaxy," he agreed.

* * *

 

She meant to get up early the next day, but the warmth of Garrus at her back kept her asleep much longer than she was used to. She was finally awoken by the beeping of her console. Garrus was already awake, but he hadn't stirred, not wanting to disturb her. He grumbled at the urgent trilling of the impatient computer. He lifted his head from on top of hers, pulling his warmth with him. He always slept huddled around her like her own personal space heater. She'd asked him about getting Turian friendly pillows, but he'd insisted that she was more comfortable than any pillow. His weight all around her, never bothered her, so she'd dropped the subject. She sighed as he rolled away from her and sat up. "I'm going to smother whoever that is," he threatened.

"It's been two days," she reminded him. "There is still a war on."

"Don't remind me," he chirped, his mandibles clicking in annoyance. He was mother henning her again. She smiled and got up stretching and popping out some tension in her back before moving to silence the console.

The message was from Hackett about a lead on the Citadel. Another email underneath it was the dossier on the Cerberus Assassin they'd encountered. Kai Leng. Anderson had apparently had a run in with him 20 years back and knew what he was capable of. That her old Captain had taken the time to put together the dossier and forward it to her in the middle of the Reaper invasion back on Earth told her that the speedy little murderer was worth taking caution with. She read over it carefully and stored the information away before pulling Hackett's message up. Garrus was moving around her room, tidying up her piles of laundry and rearranging her tech projects. "Hey," she called to him as she punched up Liara's room on the comm. "I don't come down to the battery and fiddle with your calibrations, do I?" He held up his hands and set the broken omnitool back down where he'd found it as Liara answered her summons. "Liara, sorry if I woke you, but I have a shadow broker question."

"Of course, Shepard. I was already up," Liara said, trying to stifle a yawn that echoed over the comm.

Shepard glanced sheepishly at Garrus who chuckled softly as she pressed the food release button on her aquarium VI to beat the thing to the punch. She had purchased it to make certain the damned things stayed alive if she forgot to feed them in the hectic lifestyle she lived, but he hardly ever let it do it's job. Shaking her head, she returned her attention to the comm. "Have you ever heard of an Alliance operation called Task Force Aurora?"

She heard shuffling on the other end of the comm as Liara moved around her quarters. "It doesn't ring a bell. Would you like me to look into it?"

"No, that's okay. I'm going to head down to the Citadel and meet with their head scientist. I just thought maybe if you knew something, I wouldn't be going in blind."

The Asari sighed and Shepard heard tapping that told her Liara was already researching. "I'll do some digging and get back to you," she said and closed the comm.

* * *

 

Shepard found herself a couple of hours later landing her cab outside the collection of labs belonging to Dr. Garret Bryson. She had donned her uniform to make it feel a bit more formal and the neck was itching where Garrus had left a mark on her the night before. The happy memory had her smiling as she entered the unlocked labs. Immediately to her right, she was greeted by a heavily shielded piece of Reaper. The curved cylindrical 'tentacle' loomed over her, thickening the air. She gave it a wide berth as she stepped further into the office. A young man tapped frantically on a computer toward the back of the lab. Several stations sat unoccupied with all sorts of experiments in various stages of completion strewn all over. Over head, there was a skeleton of some sort of aquatic dinosaur suspended from wires. As Shepard's eyes struggled to take in the amount of science happening in the room, she was greeted by a man in his late 50's with grey, thinning hair, and darkly tanned skin whose wrinkles denoted many years of field work under the sun. "Ah, Commander Shepard. We've been expecting you. Just a moment."

He waved her to follow him as he tasked the young man with retrieving the 'Leviathan data' for him. She was led past the piece of Sovereign and down a short corridor that opened out into a smaller, less cluttered lab. To her left was a large glass encasement full of all sorts of artifacts that were carefully cataloged. Something felt odd about the room, but she shrugged it off, following Bryson to a galaxy map interface similar to the one she used on the Normandy. There were several consoles tracking random bits of data. He closed down the map and moved to a table in the middle of the room with a microscope and an array of other tools for his research. Smack dab in the middle of the table was the head of a husk, still animated and looking rather put out at being mounted on a stand. It screamed at Bryson as he approached the table, but he ignored it as it followed his movements back and forth across the surface. Shepard was slightly tickled by the thing as it struggled to affect the world around it to no avail.

Bryson handed her a data pad and pulling her attention away from the macabre piece of research, she glanced at the data being presented to her. He spoke about their assignment to study Reaper lore and how they had been sorting out fact from fiction for years. Shepard nodded, as Bryson told her that a breakthrough was near. "Hadley," he said to his assistant as the younger man came into the room. "Do you have the Leviathan data?"

Shepard, still enraptured by the information on the data pad paid little attention until she heard the gunshot. She looked up to see Bryson clutch his chest over his heart and fall dead with a pained grunt. Her eyes flicked to the assistant who was swinging his arm in her direction, a small time pistol clutched in his hands. Not having brought a weapon of her own, she glanced down at the data pad and chucked it at his face. It hit him in the throat and she followed close behind it, tackling the stunned man to the ground. The gun flew across the room and she was on her comm in seconds. "This is Commander Shepard. I need C-Sec at my location now!"

The man laid limp on the ground. His attempt on her life a failure. She sneered as he mumbled in a monotone voice. "You shouldn't be here.... The darkness can't be breached..."

She had no idea what he was talking about, but she pushed up from the floor and picked up the pistol, tucking it into her belt. When C-Sec arrived within minutes, they had to pry the man off the floor and sit him in chair. He sat and stared as if in a trance. Shepard paced in front of him, sizing him up as two armed Turians in C-Sec uniforms gave her his name. The man blinked slowly as two other officers hovered near Bryson's body, clicking photos with their omnitools. "Shepard," EDI appeared in the entry of the lab, in full armor. She was a sight for sore eyes. "I monitored a C-Sec alert from this location. Were you harmed?"

The AI sashayed to her side and scanned the situation with her eyes, gathering data and making her own assumptions about what had happened. "I'm fine, but I could use your help sorting this out, EDI." Shepard assured her. "Take a look through their files. I need to know what this task force was up to."

"At once." The AI nodded and set to digging through the nearest console for information.

When Shepard returned her attention to the assistant, Derek Hadley, he was shaking his head like something confused him. He rubbed at this throat where the data pad had clipped him and said. "What? I..." He glanced around at the C-Sec officers and panic raced over his features. "What's... happening?"

"You tell me," Shepard growled, wishing she had her visor to monitor his heart-rate. She crossed her arms and waited for the lies.

"I... I was gathering our data when you arrived, and then... It was dark... cold... like I was someplace else..." he stuttered.

"And then?" she asked, her fists clenching.

"I don't know!" Hadley shouted, genuine fear ripping from his throat. "A... gun was in my hand. Dr. Bryson. There was... a loud noise." His eyes were darting back and forth like a deer in the headlights.

Shepard grabbed him by the arm and dragged him from the chair. She bodily flung him to the floor beside Bryson's body and shouted back at him. "You shot Bryson! You killed him!"

"No! I couldn't have," the man pleaded, his fingers slipping in the blood that had pooled around Bryson's ashen form. He threw himself backwards and attempted to crab walk from the body, tracking blood around the floor. "I'm not a murderer," he wailed, the proximity to Bryson clearly upsetting him. "I didn't do it, it wasn't me! You have to believe that!"

"So someone else pulled that trigger?" she pushed, trying to get to the bottom of why he would lie to her. She was there when it happened. She saw him do it.

"But I would never do that..." he shivered, trying his best to not look at the body.

"Commander!" EDI piped up from the console. "This does resemble reports of indoctrination."

Shepard's hands twitched beside the pistol she still had tucked in her belt and her heart-rate increased. She knew it had felt odd in the room. Her eyes flicked around the room, searching for the cause of the eerie feeling as Hadley stammered. "Indoctrination? Me?" he pushed himself up from the floor and to his credit didn't sit back in the chair, but stood subconsciously scrubbing his hands on his thighs in an attempt to scrub the blood from his fingers.

"What about that 'Leviathan' Bryson mentioned?" Shepard asked, her eyes settling on a large orb behind the glass encasement. "How does that tie in?"

"It's some kind of creature. Our field teams have been tracking it," Hadley informed her, speaking as if a different person were now standing in front of her. He glanced back at the orb that she was staring at and said. "That artifact came in from our researcher, Garneau. He sent an audio log if you want to...." He suddenly doubled over in pain, clutching his head and shouting, paying no heed to the blood that smeared in his face and in his hair.

"What's wrong?" Shepard asked, afraid to touch him.

He fell to his knees and his arms fell slack to his sides. His eyes were distant, focusing on nothing in particular as the monotone returned to his voice. It made the streaks of red from Bryson's blood that adorned his face that much more disturbing. "Turn back."

"What are you talking about?" Shepard demanded. She had a sneaking suspicion she wasn't talking to Hadley any more.

"The darkness cannot be breached." No sooner were the words out of his mouth that his far reaching eyes rolled up into his head, and he collapsed at her feet.

She backed a step away. "Dammit! Get him over to the clinic. See if they can tell us what's wrong with him."

The two Turian officers gathered him up and carried his limp form outside. The other officers placed Bryson's body in a body bag and carted him off as Shepard glared curiously at the orb. She was brought back to the present as EDI's sultry voice interrupted her thoughts. "Commander. You'll want to see this. It's an outgoing message from Dr. Bryson to Admiral Hackett."

Shepard peeled her eyes from the orb and walked over to EDI as the AI pulled up a video log. The conversation was short while Bryson explained that the Batarians had found a Reaper corpse years ago that had been killed in battle. Hackett and her both came quickly to the same conclusion. _What exactly was powerful enough to defeat a Reaper?_ It had taken nearly the entire Alliance fleet to take down Sovereign and the mother of all Thresher Maws to take down the one on Tuchanka. Bryson had called the creature 'Leviathan'. A suitable name if you asked Shepard. Bryson continued in a follow up conversation that Leviathan was an apex predator and it had the Reapers nervous enough to be shadowing his field teams. She watched Hackett give Bryson the go ahead and the funding to find out everything he could. Then he told him there would be help forthcoming. Apparently she was that help.

"Anything capable of killing a Reaper could do a lot of collateral damage," Shepard mused.

"Yet given the state of this conflict, I believe the saying, 'the enemy of my enemy is my friend', may be relevant," EDI pointed out.

"But, we won't know unless we can find it," Shepard agreed cautiously.

"Bryson's assistant did say they recently received a log from their field researcher. It may yield more information," EDI tossed her head toward a data pad on the edge of the surface where the console she was working on was situated.

Shepard picked up the data pad, the act putting her uncomfortably close to the encasement and the orb. It seemed to react to her proximity, the swirling multicolored fog inside it quickening. The motion made her skin crawl. She looked away from the orb and attempted to concentrate on the datapad. The voice on the audio recording sounded cheerful and determined. The man mentioned the orb and tracking Leviathan by 'crunching numbers'.

Shepard and EDI put their heads together, scouring the labs for the data that Garneau was using to extrapolate Leviathan's path. As she flipped through some papers on the table in the middle of the room, Shepard couldn't help poking her fingers at the plaintive husk head. It followed your movements everywhere you went and if you got too close, it would scream. After poking it for a third time, EDI flashed her a look that asked, _really_? And Shepard cleared her throat and went back to her research.

Finding nothing relevant in that room, she crossed back into the first room with the piece of Sovereign. Somehow she was more put off by the orb in the other room than the floating piece of Reaper. She scanned the arm with her omnitool and mumbled to herself in greeting. "Sovereign, 'Vanguard of our Destruction'. How's that working out for you Big Guy?" Finding nothing interesting on the Reaper piece itself, she turned to the large work-space behind her that was tracking Reaper movements. She was unable to hack the code to read the data and a small holo recording of Bryson told her he kept the code 'close to his heart'.

Putting the Reaper data on the back burner, she and EDI explored more of the room. Shepard glanced up at the bones suspended from the ceiling and grinned, "Loch Ness Monster?"

"Plesiosaur," EDI corrected with a roll of her synthetic eyes.

"Loch Ness Monster is more interesting," Shepard grumbled.

"Interesting _and_ non existent," EDI assured her.

Shepard sighed and continued to search. The lab turned up some interesting search parameters, but without the Reaper data, they would be searching more systems and it would take weeks. Shepard decided that if the answer was 'close to his heart', that she would take a look upstairs at Bryson's private quarters. She rummaged in his things, trying her best to keep mostly everything undisturbed. She happened across a childhood drawing done by 'Ann Bryson'. As she admired the cute little stick figure family, she noticed some discoloration in the green that served as grass under their feet. Focusing on the yellowing color, she picked out some numbers added to the drawing. "Huh," she smirked as she laid the picture flat and scanned over it with her omnitool. "Close to his heart." She had a momentary bit of regret that the girl had no idea that her father was dead. From the age of the drawing and the look of Bryson himself, his daughter had to be an adult now. Shepard made a personal note to find her and tell her personally about her father.

With the Reaper data, they had everything that EDI speculated was necessary to narrow their search. After an hour of ceaselessly comparing search parameters and judging which bits of data were valid and which ones were junk, they finally had a system. Shepard sighed in relief and ushered EDI to the cab so they could get back to the Normandy and get some work done.

* * *

 

Three days later they had jumped to the Aysur system and scanned all around the system for Garneau's location. They found him on a mining facility built on a metallic asteroid owned by a company called T-GES Mineral Works. Shepard eagerly suited up and called Garrus and Kaidan on deck. She felt good as Steve flew the shuttle toward the asteroid with her two boys back on her six where they belonged. She was so comfortable with the two of them as a team that she was hoping that nothing had shifted their balance in the last few years. It had been too long.

She stood and anxiously made her way to stand behind Steve's chair. The thought of finding something out here that could tip the scales of this war in their favor was exciting. "I'm reading Reaper enemy signatures in the asteroid field," Cortez warned her, pointing out the blips on the radar.

"Bryson said they were shadowing his field teams. If they're after Leviathan too, Reapers are a good sign," she said.

A wry chuckle from the back of the shuttle brought her attention back to Garrus. "That's not something I ever thought I would hear."

"Never thought I'd say it," she agreed. "Take us in." She patted Steve's shoulder and went back to her team.

The shuttle landed gently on a small platform above the main entry way. Shepard hopped out and readied her gun. Moving to a lift ahead that would take them down, she spotted below, a group of Reaper troops gathered around the entry to the main facility. "We've got Marauders and a Brute," Garrus assessed through his scope.

She smiled, operating the lift. When it jerked downward she swapped her pistol for her shotgun and said. "You two handle the Marauders, I'll do the heavy lifting."

"Be careful," Garrus warned with a growl as she called her biotics, glowing a soft blue.

"I always am," she insisted, the phrase drawing a disbelieving snort from Kaidan before she charged off to meet the Brute.

The massive Reaper troop stumbled back with a roar as she collided with it. She used its momentary confusion to slip under its legs and get behind it. It swung it's massive crab claw like arm behind it, trying to reach her. She ducked the swing then hit it with her shotgun to stun it again, the pellets spraying in an arch on it's massive chest. It reared back, and she got behind it again and used the bony protrusions along it's spine to climb up it's back. She charged the incinerate on her omnitool while she balanced on it's shoulders, wedged inside the cage of protection. It tried to reach up and smash her with it's claw again, but all it succeeded in doing was bouncing off it's own spikes. She grabbed at it's fringe as it shook, to maintain her balance, and it roared in pain as she yanked upwards. She pulled harder, ripping the plates up from the sensitive skin below and shoved her hand inside, offloading her incinerate. Her own shields complained at the heat, but they held as the Brute tried again to dislodge her. She unsheathed her omniblade and dug it under the undamaged plates on the opposite side of the Brute's head. There was a sickening pop as the fringe came loose from the thing's head and it shook its head like a cat taking a static shock to the nose. She called her biotics and dug her fist into the open wound, unleashing a nova directly into the thing's brain. It collapsed beneath her and she rolled away and popped back to her feet beside Kaidan who was watching her with a mixture of disgust and awe.

Before he could comment, another brute showed up at the top of the stairs that led to the main entrance, howling loudly and beating it's chest. "Ugh, since when do they travel in packs?" Shepard complained, her skin glowing blue again as she readied her biotics.

"Hmm, I seem to remember six of them at once at the Shroud," Garrus reminded her as he took aim with his Black Widow.

"Eight," she corrected him. "But they were falling directly from the Reaper over head."

"That sounds like a story. I've missed a lot," Kaidan sighed.

Shepard bolted forward and with a shout landed at the Brute's feet. Garrus took a shot at it's shoulder while Kaidan peppered it with assault rifle fire then pushed it away with his biotics as it tried to swing at Shepard. She danced out of its reach and unloaded her shotgun while her overload charged. She moved to climb it again and Garrus grumbled. "Shepard, please don't climb the Brutes. It makes it really hard to get a shot off."

"We both know you win at best marksman against the wind on the top of the Presidium. Lemme have the best Brute killer," she complained as she grabbed hold of the bone cage as Kaidan held it still in a stasis field.

She grabbed hold of the fringe again and twisted it's head to expose the thick metal tubing that held it's head on it's body. She jammed her overload between two of the tubes and shocked the thing into submission as it's body seized and dropped, she gave one last yank to the head with biotics backing her strength and one of the tubes disconnected, spilling a tar like substance that threw a rancid stench into the air. "Oh, God!" Kaidan lurched, turning away from the smell.

"Spirits!" Garrus reached into the bone cage and pulled her out. "Don't touch it."

"Ugh," she gagged at the unexpected smell. "That is awful."

They stood as downwind as they could get in the artificial air of the force-field and regained their stomachs. "You know, Shepard, it is really creepy how good you've gotten at using their fringe as a weapon against them." Garrus said with a soft chuckle and a gentle pat on her upper arm.

She smirked. "Just a little incentive to stay on my good side." She nudged him playfully.

He cracked his neck and said, "As if I needed any more."

"I don't think I'll ever get used to you being a biotic, Shepard. You've got almost vanguard strength," Kaidan said in almost awe.

Garrus bristled and said, "With the bullheadedness to go with it." She pouted and he shook himself off almost like a duck ridding it's feathers of water. "Every time you charge in like that, I think I have a tiny heart attack."

Kaidan snickered. "Isn't that how it goes when you're dating Shepard? One tiny heart attack at a time..."

She glanced from one to the other as they shared a knowing grin. "Oh, if you two are going to gang up on me, I'll leave you behind on the ship and bring EDI and Javik next time I go out." She threatened with a teasing grin. "Come on, let's get inside before more show up."

As she hacked open the locked door, Kaidan stepped up behind her. "You know Commander, these people are probably scared shitless inside. They're civilians."

"You're probably right, Major." She emphasized his choice to use her rank, unsure whether it was teasing or if he was trying to apologize for taking Garrus' side. "Weapons up. I don't wanna scare anyone."

She had already holstered her shotgun and she heard the telltale beeping and rustling as their weapons deactivated, folding up to be stored compactly on their backs. The lock opened easily at her coaxing and she deactivated her omnitool as they stepped into a small airlock. The air cycled through a short decontamination and when the inner doors opened, they were greeted with an eerily calm group of scientists and miners, milling about the lobby like it was business as usual. "Weird," Kaidan grumbled, his armor clacking softly as he adjusted his shoulders, catching the same strange thickening feel of the air as she had. She walked slowly inside, suddenly loathe to allow the doors to close them in with these people. Garrus' subvocals were humming noisily in reaction to her unease leaving her a small measure of comfort as they approached the reception desk. Most of the people around ignored them, some plastered unsettling glares in their direction, one woman turning her head at a strange angle to get a better look at them. Shepard fought the urge to shudder as her skin crawled under the heavy scrutiny.

Two guards were posted at the reception desk. One stood, hovering over the other's shoulder as he sat in front of a console. Neither of them were focused on the task at hand. Their eyes were fixed straight forward, regarding Shepard with a look that made the hair on the back of her neck stand up and her fingers twitch restlessly near her pistol. "I'm Commander Shepard of the Alliance. You just had Reaper troops attacking your front door." She announced to the staring men.

The seated guard spoke in a familiar monotone that did nothing to ease her nerves. "Are they still there?"

"I've taken care of them, for now," she assured him, waiting for some kind of human response.

The standing guard, in the same monotone, said, "I see that will be all." Both men glanced away from her, proceeding to ignore the fact that she was even standing there.

"That will be...?" she allowed her voice to trail off as Garrus moved up to her left where a small button labeled assistance waited to be pressed. "Hello?" she prodded, tempted to wave a hand in front of their faces.

Garrus touched a talon to the button and a small alert dinged behind the desk. Both men looked up again as if seeing her for the first time. The seated one said, "Yes, welcome to T-GES Mineral Works. How can we help you?"

"Yes. For the tour. Please sign in," the other picked up.

Shepard balled her fists in frustration. "You don't seem worried about those Reapers. You know something I don't?" Perhaps the Leviathan was here. Had Garneau found it? Was it protecting these people?

"T-GES Mineral Works is a small to mid-level supplier of Tungsten to the galaxy." The standing man offered unhelpfully. It was like they were puppets on a string.

"That's not what I meant," she nearly growled.

"Are you familiar with the applications of tungsten?" he continued.

She tried a different tactic. Garrus' hum became a growl as she stepped closer to the desk and placed her palms flat on the surface. "I'm looking for a researcher named Dr. Garneau. He would have arrived within the last couple of weeks. If he's still here, I need to speak with him." Her tone was patient, not matching with her inner frustration.

After a short pause, the seated man said, "We have no Dr. Garneau."

The other spoke nearly on top of him, "Do you need to see a doctor?"

"How about I just go in and look around?" she asked in an urgent tone.

"No. The access elevator is broken," the standing man said, his staring eyes flicking to the left. She followed his gaze and the door leading to what she assumed was the public tour area of the facility was indeed sparking, the access terminal a sickly orange color.

Her lip curled in anger as the sitting guard drew her attention back to them. "And now... we're done. Step away."

"Step away. You don't belong here," the other repeated.

As her hands left the desk and her fits clenched again, Garrus' hand landed on her shoulder with a light pressure that pulled her away from the desk. "Bad vibe to these guys. I don't think we want to push it."

She nodded a silent agreement as the guards went back to ignoring her. She was tempted to push the button again just to be spiteful, but she regretfully shrugged Garrus' hand from her shoulder and said through gritted teeth. "Let's look around. Carefully."

They discreetly examined the access terminal and Shepard determined she wouldn't be able to fix it on her own. "We need to repair that thing," Garrus hummed.

"There's a drone station over there," Kaidan pointed, his voice low.

She followed his gesture and found the console. Garrus and Kaidan blocked her from view as she spawned the repair drone. "We need to stay with it," she informed them. The drone worked off of their omnitools, using them as portable batteries to power itself. She followed the drone slowly to the door and stood in front of it, trying not to look suspicious as the thing hummed as it worked. She whistled nonchalantly, tapping her foot to drown out the sound. Once the door was fixed, the drone despawned automatically with a short whine and Shepard sighed and slipped into the newly opened door, taking a scan of the logs. The information she found stated that Garneau had used the lift within the last week. So he _was_ here.

They rode up and the elevator emptied them in to a group of rooms laid out in a particularly inefficient pattern. Shepard supposed from the informational consoles all around that the design was set up with tours in mind. She was getting tired of doors randomly closing and locking in her face as she meandered around the labs, trying to look like she belonged. The workers weren't fooled. Everywhere she went, she was taunted by the monotone voice that continuously informed her that she did not belong there. "Yeah, I'm starting to get that impression," she muttered to herself, finally having enough as she passed a group of workers huddled around a holo projector. She pulled up her omnitool and hacked the lock on a nearby door and stepped inside under the glares of the workers. The room was nothing special, but as she began to shuffle through the piles of boxes full of papers and datapads, she caught sight of one that blinked an irritated red. When she picked it up, the red was signaling that the message had not been transmitted. She played back the audio file attached. Garneau's voice poured forth, warning Bryson about the artifact. Apparently he had found another one in the mines on the asteroid. There was a helpful navpoint and a security pass code that would let her hack the security terminal she had already tried to hack on her own minutes ago. Garneau sounded nervous. She replaced the datapad and left the room to back track to the security terminal.

The terminal informed them that there had been an altercation in the mines and that Garneau, or 'unknown male', had been sent to the medical wing. Getting directions to the medical wing, she walked briskly along the halls, beyond caring whether she was under scrutiny. She punched in the patient file number to gain access to the hospital and entered the deserted wing.

The dimly lit area drove her wiggins through the roof. There should be at least one attending physician. The walls were dingy and looked in disrepair. The large red cross painted near the entrance stood starkly in contrast to the dusty length of empty grey. She pushed forward, finding a short hallway surrounded on either side by light-less rooms. On her left, she cupped her hands on the glass to peer into the dark room. She could vaguely make out a body splayed out on a slab, no machines hooked up nor any indication he was alive. "Is that Garneau?" Kaidan asked, his voice husky with worry.

"I hope not," Garrus grumped. "If it is, we came a long way for nothing."

She hung her head, frustration taking over. She was about to find a way to get to the mines when a voice interrupted her thoughts. "If you are looking for Garneau, you have found him. I am Dr. Garneau."

She spun, her relief palpable as she saw a man standing behind the glass on the opposite side of the hallway. His features were obscured by the darkness and she squinted, trying to get a better look at him. "I'm Commander Shepard of the Alliance. Are you all right?"

"Yes. Only... I'm trapped in here," the man admitted with a sigh, leaning on a surface in front of him that she was unable to make out.

"What's been going on in this place?" she asked, hoping for some answers from the only normal sounding person she'd come across.

"I was doing my research. Until the incident," he informed her.

"They attacked you," she guessed.

"It's true, but aside from my confinement, I'm fine," he assured her.

"Bryson's research led me to you," she began hoping he might tell her how to get him out of the room from her side.

"Bryson sent you?" the man asked as if it were unthinkable.

"He's dead, doctor. Killed by his assistant," she informed him sadly. Bryson's death still weighed on her.

"I see," the man sighed, lowering his head.

"I need you to tell me everything you found on the Leviathan," she begged, her visor scanning the area and trying to find a way through to get to him. "Bryson seemed to think it killed a Reaper."

After a drawn out pause, the man raised his head and shook it from side to side. "It's a myth. A dead end."

"Hmm..." Garrus rumbled, stepping up to address the man. "But what about the artifact you mentioned in your message?"

"I did?.... No," the man insisted.

Shepard smelled a lie. "Yes, doctor. You did." Her eyes narrowed in suspicion. "But now we've got Reaper forces attacking, so I need to break you out. We'll grab the artifact and go."

"Reapers?" The man's voice became panicked at the mention. "The Darkness must not be breached."

"The darkness?" she demanded, praying she hadn't heard that right.

She jumped back as he approached the window and his fist slammed into the reinforced glass. "Why do you pursue me?!" The voice was no longer the normal human voice that he had been speaking in. It was low and growling, the thought of a voice like that leaving a human mouth made her throat sore just to hear it.

"Doctor?" she wished she could get through to him, past whatever was controlling him.

His fist slammed the glass again, joined by the other on his opposite side. The unbreakable glass splintering in tendrils from the force. His hands slid down the glass, as he uttered a warning. "Leave the artifact. You will not take what is mine."

"I don't think that's Garneau we're talking to," Kaidan hissed in her ear. She had backed away from the glass and into his space. Garrus was studying the glass pointedly.

"You!" she accused, stepping away from Kaidan again and challenging the creature. "You killed a Reaper. I need your help."

"You bring only death!" The unnatural voice echoed, crawling inside her head and exploding in flashes of piercing sound.

She buckled under the weight of the presence, clutching her head. The glass silently shattered, the only sound around her a mind numbing ringing. Her teammates were as debilitated as she was, writhing under the deafening sound. She saw the figure vault over the window sill and take off down the hallway. Forcing herself to recover, she shook her head, the ringing dogging her as she gave chase. The door slammed behind him and she cursed, unable to hear herself as she hastily ran a bypass on her omnitool to follow him. Her companions appeared at her back, Garrus' hand on her shoulder as she worked. She growled her displeasure as the bypass took forever. Garrus distracted her, grabbing her face and turning her to look at him, his finger swiping over her cheek, below her ear. His mandibles were pulled tightly to his face as he held the finger up in front of her, his lips moving soundlessly as he tried to tell her that her ears were bleeding. She shook her head, dislodging his grip. "We need to catch him. He's our chance to find Leviathan." She couldn't tell if she was shouting, but it felt like she might be. He didn't try to stop her again, but his hand landed on her shoulder again and gave a concerned squeeze.

Another locked door awaited her after they passed through that one and as she worked, the primary power shut down around them, leaving them in the soft glow of emergency lighting. She thought she heard Kaidan comment on the power, but the ringing was foremost in her ears, making her head buzz. When the door slid open, she spotted Garneau at the end of the hallway and she sprinted towards him, but the door closed and the locking mechanism shorted out. "Ugh," she growled, at least able to hear herself. "We need to get to that artifact before him."

Garrus' voice was a welcome sound as she glanced around for another way out. "He said it was in the mines."

She spotted a secondary access ladder that lead out of the facility to the roof. She signaled for them to follow her and made her way up. "We have the navpoint from his notes. Let's hope it hasn't been moved," she said as she scurried down a ladder outside that took her to the ground level.

They moved as quickly as they could to where Kaidan said there was access to the mines at the tram station. Her hearing slowly returned, reminding her of the fight on Sur'Kesh. "Heads up!" Garrus shouted reaching out to stop her as he pointed out the husks that were scurrying up the side walls of the upraised pathway they were following.

She whipped out her shockwave to knock them off the edge and moved forward. "You can stop humming, Garrus. I'm fine," she said over her shoulder to let him know she could hear his concern again.

He stifled the concerned rumbling in his chest. "I'm going to start buying you ear plugs." He threatened.

"You should be thanking Cerberus for my heightened healing abilities or I might be deaf already," she quipped, drawing a grumble from Kaidan at the mention of Cerberus.

"Next time I'm up close and personal with the Illusive Man, before I shoot him, I'll be sure to thank him," Garrus agreed.

More Reaper troops blocked their path as they made their way across the outside of the facility. There were also modified rachni and a new type of mutation that nearly made her sick to her stomach. The thing was tall and slender, all of it's features exaggerated beyond recognition. Like the Maurauders and their Turian features, these had once been Asari. Shepard nearly wept at the warped shell of a once beautiful creature. It's mouth hung wide and it glowed with biotics. It glanced between them, as if choosing it's target. They had gotten separated into their own covers as they fought to stay out of range of the rachni's heavy cannons that would take down your shields in seconds. She was far from both Kaidan and Garrus. She watched the mutated Asari's eyes land on Garrus as he replaced his thermal clip. It's arms flew down and outwards as it let out a deafening shriek before jumping out of sight with it's biotics to land a good 20 feet closer to Garrus than it had been. Shepard panicked. "Kaidan! Deal with the rachni! Draw it's fire!" she shouted.

"Got it," he answered through gritted teeth as the Banshee shrieked again. It bore down on Garrus and she gathered her own biotics to beat it at it's own game.

"Incoming, Garrus!" she warned before unleashing her charge and slamming into the twisted Reaper troop. It wailed at her, and she ignored the pain in her head as her ear drums took another beating. She pulled back her fist and punched as hard as she could knocking the thing back with a full biotic punch. It had a barrier as thick as her armor and she cursed as she was forced to pull it's attention from Garrus by flinging smaller biotic warp fields at it and whittling down the protection. The thing's own biotics were powerful and it's warp fields ripped through her shields and dug into her nerve endings. The pain was excruciating, but she persevered. Suddenly she had help. Kaidan must have finished off the rachni because he was flinging helpful biotics into the mix to help. Finally they shattered the barrier around the Banshee and she shouted. "It's unprotected, Big Guy! Take it down." One last warp left it's hands to find her around the corner of her cover before Garrus blew it's head open with a shot from his Black Widow.

"Shepard!" he cried as she collapsed to the ground, vaguely aware of the twisting sensation happening in her chest. Her body exploded in pain as the warp ravaged through her cells. "Spirits!" He was much closer now, hovering over her as her limbs seized. He pulled her into his arms, lending her strength to ride out the pain. His subharmonics cooed in that comforting lullaby he would sing to her when she would wake in the night after a nightmare. She didn't think he knew she was aware of it, but she would listen as the soothing melody lulled her back to sleep. It was automatic on his part. Whenever she stirred, he would pull her closer, run fingers through her hair and the cooing would start. As the pain ebbed, she reached up and thankfully caressed his scarred mandible. Every dip and crack in his skin like an old friend. Even if she were blind, she would know his face. Her eyes were still closed as he dipped his head and gently touched her forehead with his. His subharmonics thrummed with relief as he whispered. "There went another of those heart attacks."

A choked laugh escaped her throat. "The thrills of being Ann Shepard's boyfriend."

"I'm fairly certain the honor is going to be the death of me." A small unvoiced conversation happened between their bodies as he asked if she could stand by pulling back and cocking his head. She nodded and he un-snaked his arms from around her back, one hand lingering there to support her as she sat up. He gathered himself up and reached the other hand down to grip hers and pull her to her feet. She swayed as her muscles ached in the aftermath of the warp. His hand never left her back until she wordlessly patted his chest and took a step back, catching her breath and shaking out a slight tingling in her fingers. Chakwas was going to love it if she had nerve damage.

"Huh," Kaidan said softly as he watched them together. He cracked a small smile that he aimed at Shepard. "I get it now."

"Get what?" she asked brushing off her armor and delaying having to walk just yet.

His honey colored eyes flicked to Garrus and his head tipped slightly in a congratulatory bow. "Why she chose you."

Garrus' mandibles flicked nervously as he accepted the gentle praise from Kaidan. Shepard was happy to see that Kaidan was happy for them instead of playing the jealous ex. His features told her that everything was okay and she needn't worry about any potential awkwardness at them working together. "He's my big softie," she reached up and patted Garrus on the cheek, earning her a swat to the hand as he glared at her, a glimmer of humor behind the expression.

"I believe we had the 'nothing soft about me' conversation on Illium," he reminded her.

"Sure thing, Archangel. Let's go. We need to get that artifact." She finally felt able to move without her legs acting like rubber beneath her and she strode off, a chuckle from Kaidan following her.

They gained access to the mines and found Garneau surrounded by husks that approached him slowly. His back was pressed against a podium that looked like it had been carved out of the mines, bits of metal and rock still clinging to its edges. Atop the podium sat another of the creepy artifacts with it's swirling colorful insides calling to her. She shook the sensation off and aimed her pistol to take out a few of the husks. She growled as Garneau blocked her shot. He refused to move, the deep growling voice of Leviathan warning her to "TURN BACK!"

"Garneau!" she shouted, spotting the detonator in his grip. He gazed at her with sad determination and his thumb came down on the button. The explosion knocked them all back and she slapped the floor angrily before pushing herself back up. "Damn it!" The artifact and everything in it's vicinity was destroyed.

While Shepard inwardly cursed, Garrus moved to another civilian who had apparently been there a while. There was a faint hint of the sweet smell of death as Garrus rolled the body over. A data pad fell from his hands and Kaidan picked it up. "Shepard, you're gonna wanna see this."

"What've you got?" she asked joining them beside the body.

"That wasn't Garneau... this is. And he's been dead for a while," Kaidan explained.

"So Leviathan can have Bryson killed, can take over this colony, and he can use them as puppets... Huh..." she mused, the information pointing to a very disturbing truth. "Anything else useful?"

"Encrypted data and a personal log with eight missed calls from a Dr. Ann Bryson." Kaidan said, his fingers scrolling across the data pad.

"Ann Bryson?" The doctor's daughter? Was she involved?

Her thoughts were interrupted by several of the colonists appearing at the door to investigate the explosion. "Who... Who are you? What are you doing here?" one human woman asked as she approached cautiously, her eyes flicking all over the scene.

"I'm Commander Shepard. Are you all right?" she asked, understanding that with the loss of the artifact came the loss of the connection to Leviathan.

"I think so," the woman responded, rubbing her forehead. "I feel like... I feel strange, but... all right."

"Do you recognize this man?" She asked gently as Garrus rolled the body further over so the colonists all could get a good look.

"I've never seen him before in my life," an Asari woman said, stepping up to stand beside the original woman who'd spoken. Nods all around collaborated her story.

"Someone here killed him," Shepard sighed, realizing they probably had no recollection of the act.

"Someone here? How is that possible? I'm so sorry..." The Asari spoke again, glancing around at all of her companions, many of which looked in several stages of weariness.

"Can you tell me anything about what happened to you?" Shepard asked as Garrus stood up from his crouch, probably to escape the smell of Garneau's body.

"Not really," the human woman spoke up again. "I, uh, remember... It just seemed cold. I remember a feeling. Cold and dark."

One of the men stood up from leaning on a pipe behind the Asari. "If dark was a feeling, that's exactly what I felt."

"That artifact," Shepard glanced behind herself at the shattered orb. "Do you know where it came from?"

"Came out of the mine," the man answered a little slowly as if recalling a distant memory. "Right. Head office was supposed to send someone. That's about all I can..."

With a sigh, Shepard realized she was getting nothing from these people. She activated her comm to the shuttle. "Cortez, what's your situation? Can you bring the shuttle?"

"Affirmative. Strangest thing... Couple of minutes ago, the Reaper forces broke off and left." Steve informed her.

"Reaper?" the male worker asked, his interest piqued. "What's a Reaper?"

Surprise in his subharmonics drew her attention to Garrus and they both exchanged a shocked look. Could these people have lost that much time? Reapers had been on the tips of the galaxy's tongue for nearly four years. She returned her gaze to the workers who were all looking at them expectantly for answers. "What year do you think this is?"

"2176," the Asari said innocently.

"2176 was ten years ago," Shepard said softly as chills ran through her body at the awful realization.

"What?" the Asari said her voice wispy in disbelief and horror.

Shepard turned away from the horrified looks all directed at her. Her heart clenched. She knew what it was like to lose two years. Ten years was paralyzing. She swallowed a lump in her throat. "Let's arrange for these people to be evacuated into temporary quarantine." She started toward the exit feeling the need for some fresh air.

Garrus was right on her heels, sensing the discomfort bubbling up in her chest. He stopped her in her tracks, grabbing her hand and turning her to look at him. "If these people have been out of it for that long, they're in for a shock." His words made her think. What would she do if she lost ten years of her life? She squeezed his hand and walked away.

* * *

 

The conversation in the shuttle ride on the way back to the Normandy had gone from bad to worse. Kaidan had pointed out Leviathan's indoctrination ability and Garrus had suggested that Leviathan just might be a rogue Reaper itself. Shepard's skin was clammy and her heart was racing. They had left that artifact just lying out in the open on the Citadel. It could be indoctrinating people as they spoke.

She was pacing up and down her cabin while the Normandy raced back to the Citadel so they could deal with the artifact and try to find Bryson's daughter and see what her involvement was in the situation. She hadn't even heard Garrus enter when she walked right into his waiting arms. "This Leviathan has you really worked up," he pointed out, holding her at arms length to study her face. "Wanna talk about it?"

She sighed and her hands fidgeted. He grasped them and she looked down at his gloved hands. "With as many times as I've dodged indoctrination, they get so deep into my head. I just... I wonder sometimes whether this will be the time... I don't want to lose myself..."

"Shepard, you're leaking," he said with a soft chuckle removing one of his gloves to brush away the tear that slipped down her cheek. He cupped the back of her head with his hand and pulled her close to his chest where that comforting cooing was already happening. After a few moments, he spoke, his voice rumbling through her person and wrapping her up like a warm blanket. "Do you really think the Reapers or this Leviathan, no matter what it might be, will be able to get through that thick skull of yours?"

Her laugh was choked and short. "You are a terrible person, Vakarian."

He hummed and cleared his throat. "Yes, well, we already knew that. But I also know that you are the one person in the galaxy that has the will to keep free of indoctrination. And if not, well, I lost you for two years already. I'll be damned if I let some Reaper take you from me again."

* * *

 

Bryson's lab was still wrapped in crime scene tape when they arrived. She and EDI stepped inside and she glanced around. The husk head spun to glare at them and she stuck her tongue out at it. It screamed and wriggled, but it could do nothing more. She passed the table where it sat and wiped the tracking parameters from their previous search to start fresh. "Ok, EDI. We need to use that data from Garneau's notes to shield this thing." She moved to stand in front of the artifact and it seemed to sense her presence, the swirling fog speeding up. The air thickened around her. She rubbed her arms, trying to wipe away the feeling of being covered in tar and suffocated. She wished that she hadn't talked Garrus into staying on the Normandy while they did the quick search to find Ann Bryson.

EDI used a series of data streams strung together on her omnitool to set up a nearby console with the containment shield data. When the button turned red, Shepard pressed it and a blue shielding sprung up around the pedestal where the artifact rested. The air cleared almost instantly and she could breathe again. She sighed in relief and the colors in the artifact died, leaving a black shell. It was safe as could be, now. Shepard stared for a moment, wondering how many of these things were hidden around the galaxy. It was an unsettling thought.

She turned away and helped EDI search the lab for information on the project that Ann had been working on. A video call from her in Bryson's quarters called the project 'Project Scarab'. EDI went to work extrapolating the relevant data and soon they had the system where the dig site was located.

* * *

 

Namakli was an arid and essentially deserted place. Shepard wondered why Leviathan would have bothered with such a desolate planet. As Steve piloted toward the main dig site, Shepard could see multiple Harvesters flying around overhead. Where there were Harvesters, there were more Reaper troops. They pulled up to the landing zone and she spotted a couple of figures in the small control room beside it when the shuttle door opened. A grainy message came over the shuttle's comms as Ann and her colleagues called to them for help.

"Okay," Shepard said to Kaidan and Garrus. "Let's get..."

Her orders were cut off by a violent jerking of the shuttle. A Harvester had slammed up against their tail and Steve fought the shuttle to get it back under control. "Damn it!" he shouted. "Tracking multiple bogeys."

"Get us over there!" Shepard demanded, helping Kaidan back to his feet.

"Negative! It's too hot. Heading to lower platform. Hang on!" Steve shouted as he out piloted the massive flying Reaper troop. Shepard clutched the top of the open shuttle doorway and waited for a clear place to jump. The shuttle zipped downwards to a platform that jutted out from the side of the cliffs where the facility had been built into the side of the canyon. "There! Go!" Steve shouted.

"Jump!" Shepard called, flinging herself out of the moving shuttle onto the platform as Steve flew past. Kaidan and Garrus landed beside her as she rolled to her feet.

"Get to cover!" Garrus shouted over the noise of the Reaper troops dropping in all around them.

It was raining Cannibals and Marauders and goodness knew what else. A husk came at her from one of the flaming meteorites and she cracked it in the face with the butt of her shotgun before flinging a shockwave out in front of them to knock back anything else that might be coming out of the sand that was flying up in the air from the impacts to the ground as the troops dropped in. "Keep moving! I don't wanna get pinned down! Keep an eye on our six!" she ordered cautiously but quickly pushing forward.

"Hello? Is anyone there? I'm coming down!" Ann Bryson's voice called over the comms.

"No!" Shepard shouted as pieces of the facility began to crumble around them with the weight of the impacts. Inhaling a mouthful of sand as fire smacked the ground beside her, she sputtered and coughed before calling out again. "Stay where you are! I'm Commander Shepard of the Alliance Navy. It's too dangerous! We'll come to you!"

"Yes, okay. You should take the elevator up on the far side," Ann directed her helpfully.

"Copy that! We're on our way," She flung another shockwave and the prefab unit lodged in the cliff ahead came loose and dropped down a few feet. She picked her way to the unit and dropped down in it's roof. She scurried quickly over it, not wanting to leave any weight on it if she could help it. Getting to the elevator was more of the same. Hounded by Reaper troops and the falling buildings, they had to keep turning back and finding alternate routes. It took them at least a half an hour to get to the trapped scientists and Shepard cursed the whole way as Ann continuously updated them on the Reapers. By the time they got to the elevator, Ann was the only one left. The others had attempted to escape their hiding place, and gotten quickly taken down by the sheer amount to Reaper troops all around. Shepard had to step over bodies as she made her way into the control room where Ann had huddled herself behind a desk.

The woman pointed sadly at the closest body and said, "He tried to run. I told him not to, but he wanted to help the others." Shepard knelt down in front of Ann, sympathy painted over her features. "Where did everyone go?"

"I'm sorry, they didn't make it. Doctor, I need you to come with me," Shepard said softly but urgently. Spending more time here was a terrible idea. They needed to grab Ann and get out.

"Oh God... yes of course." Ann stood, determination set in her shoulders. At least she wasn't a coward. Shepard led the doctor and her team from the control room toward an upper balcony where Steve could pick them up. Ann stuck to her like glue as they cautiously moved forward. "I... was at another dig site when they attacked." She explained as they paused so Shepard could get a bead on the Reaper situation ahead. "I got back as quick as I could, but... what's happening?"

"Shepard, look," Garrus said, interrupting whatever answer Shepard had for the doctor.

On the cliff face beside him, there was a massive and ancient cave drawing. It depicted a Reaper looking creature hovering over a group of worshiping human like figures. "I'm not sure, but it might have something to do with these paintings. Is that Leviathan?" she asked, pointing to the painting.

"Y...Yes, we think so. It's old. Much older than my father thought. And there as if the natives were under it's power. Clearly a Reaper, but acting alone. Not like any Reaper we've seen before." Shepard's stomach sunk as her suspicions were validated.

"Doctor, I understand you found something recently," she goaded, hoping that if there were one of the artifacts around here that they could destroy it.

"The artifact. Yes, of course. Incredible. It's just ahead," Ann said excitedly. She stood and led them forward. Luckily, the area seemed deserted for the time. She spoke as she practically jogged forward. "It may sound strange, but I'm certain it affects people... their behavior. I've only had a short time to study it."

"Not strange at all," Shepard said, her eyes everywhere, scanning for the tiniest bit of movement. "Did you find anything?"

"Not much, but I did learn something about the energy it generates," Ann explained.

"Get down!" Shepard hissed as they came upon a corner and she spotted a group of Marauders huddled around the orb. She stared in awe from her cover as one of the Marauders was lifted in the air, surrounded by the very energy that Ann was describing. "What are they doing?"

"They've activated it somehow," Ann said with as much awe as Shepard felt. I never managed anything...." Her words cut off and Ann began to walk out of cover and toward the artifact. Her voice turned low and guttural and Shepard felt her blood turn to ice as Leviathan took over Ann. "They've learned too well. The darkness must not be breached..."

Shepard grabbed Ann's arm to hold her back and growled. "Shepard!" Kaidan warned, scurrying from his cover to join them as they stood exposed.

"Take it out!" Shepard called to Garrus.

"Got it." He peered up over his cover with the Widow and shattered the orb with a single bullet. The release of energy as the orb was destroyed knocked back the Marauders and as far as Shepard could tell it killed them.

Ann went limp, collapsing to her knees beside Shepard. She knelt to join her, a helpful hand on her back. "You okay?... Cortez! We have Ann Bryson, need a pickup."

"On my way Commander," Cortez answered as Ann tentatively got back to her feet, shaking her head.

"Copy that." She turned to Ann and gripped her shoulder. When Ann's eyes focused on her, she said. "You see the shuttle, you run. Don't look back."

"Okay, yes..." Ann agreed and they moved.

It was a firefight as they headed for the landing zone nearby. Shepard cursed and shoved Ann behind some rocks as a Harvester landed exactly where Cortez needed to come in. "Do _not_ charge that thing!" Garrus growled from a few feet away.

For once she was inclined to agree. The last time they'd taken out a Harvester on Tuchanka was with half a platoon of Turians at their backs. "Tech attacks! Drop it's shields!" she ordered taking cover against the fireballs it was spouting from it's throat. "Kaidan! I need your rifle." He tossed his gun to her and she slapped one of her modded ammo clips into his chamber then tossed it back to him. "Aim for the node in it's chest." He nodded and set to work. She charged her overload as Garrus set off his second overload. While she waited, she shot a few rounds off with the modded ammo in her pistol. Her visor told her that the thing still had 75% of it's shields. "Hey, Big Guy, did you bring any grenades?"

He glanced at her, one brow plate raised in humor. "You did not just ask if I brought grenades."

"Shut up and give them here," she grinned. He unhooked the grenade cluster from his belt and carefully tossed it to her. "You know if I had spent your gun money on an atlas, this would be a lot easier."

He chuckled, arching his arm up over his cover as the Harvester hiccuped another wave of fireballs at them. "My gun money? What about that useless VI for your fish tank?"

"Semantics... Either way, I should have an atlas," she bit down on her tongue as she concentrated on carefully modding the grenades to set off an electric shock as they exploded. She lobbed the first one over her cover and the Harvester roared in annoyance as the grenade exploded at it's feet dealing significant damage to it's shields.

"Shepard, we buried the Mako... Let's not give you another tank to destroy," Kaidan said, his voice low as he concentrated on firing at the blue node in the middle of the Harvester's chest. His clip ran out and she cleared her throat, tossing him another modded one. He slapped it in and resumed firing.

Her third grenade was the final straw. It dropped the Harvester's shields and she threw one last overload at it before charging an incinerate. While she waited, Garrus took a few carefully aimed shots to the node and then she tossed an un-modded grenade and offloaded her incinerate simultaneously. "I think we got it," Garrus announced as he peered through his scope.

She poked her head up over the cover and watched the Harvester begin to shake. Small pieces of metal fell from it and she called out. "It's gonna blow!" Seconds after they dropped below their covers, a huge explosion lit the area. Pieces of Harvester rained down around them, metal and organic material alike. Shepard let out a disgusted noise as a glob of flesh plopped onto the ground just a few feet from her. "Gross... Everyone in one piece? Ann?" Positive answers came from everyone and Shepard risked a glance over the cover. The explosion had taken out most of the other Reaper troops in the area and she hurried Ann along toward the platform. Cortez flew up hovering the shuttle just above the ground, the hatch open. She watched Ann run and climb into the shuttle as her and the team provided cover fire. Once they'd all retreated into the shuttle, she ordered Steve back to the Normandy.

Ann flopped down on a bench, breathing heavily, but otherwise showing no outward signs of injury. "You okay?" Shepard asked her gently.

Ann's attention jerked to her, but she spoke clearly. "Yeah, Commander. I think so. I blacked out."

"Leviathan took control of you," Shepard explained apologetically. "We cut the connection before you got hurt."

"Leviathan itself?" Ann perked up like Liara at the mention of the Protheans. "That's incredible."

"The Reapers seem as interested in it as we are," Shepard mused.

"Yeah it certainly seems that way," Ann leaned forward, her elbows resting on her knees and her fingers steepling together thoughtfully.

"We were hoping you could help us figure out why. But first, doctor, I have some bad news..." Shepard began, but the girl cut her off, excitement bubbling in her tone.

"Ann, please. Suppose Leviathan has broken away from the other Reapers? Never returned to dark space? Like a rogue or even a defector... I have to call my father. He'll wanna know."

"Ann," Shepard said softly, kneeling in front to her and grabbing her attention. "You need to listen to me okay? Your father is dead. I'm sorry..." her own voice was choked with sympathy as Ann's expression fell.

"He's... What, dead? He can't be dead." Her eyes narrowed in denial.

"We met with him, hoping to find out what he knew. Something happened." Reliving the failure was difficult and Shepard was trying to explain as best she could. As gently as she could.

"Something happened?" Ann asked, her voice both inquisitive and sad.

"You're not the first to lose control. Your father's assistant. One minute he was fine, the next... he drew a gun on your father. I couldn't stop him." She glanced away in shame as Ann leaned back, closing her eyes and resting her head on the wall.

"I can't believe this," Ann said softly, the accusation that had been creeping into her voice gone.

"We have to find out what's behind it all," Shepard stood and began pacing. "You're the only one who can help us." The grieving daughter stood and moved to the back of the shuttle, hugging herself. When she said nothing, Shepard approached her. "Ann?"

She cleared her throat and glanced at Shepard. Her eyes were glistening with held back tears. "I... I want to see his office."

"We'll arrange for transportation and meet you there," Shepard promised.

* * *

 

Shepard avoided Ann on the way back to the Citadel. When they arrived, she gave the girl time to be alone before heading over to Bryson's labs with EDI. EDI waited in the lab area while Shepard went up to Bryson's quarters to find Ann sitting on the floor, back against the bed and her knees tucked up underneath her chin. She was looking at a photo clutched in her hands and tears fell freely from her eyes. Shepard felt a pang of empathy. She knew the loss of a parent. It felt like your heart was being ripped out and handed to you. Someone you idolized and looked up to had been stripped from your life to leave a black empty hole in your chest.

"I'm sorry, I can come back," she muttered quietly.

Ann glanced up from the photo and shook her head, scrubbing the tears from her round cheeks with her sleeves. "No, please. I'm okay..." She stood and reached out as Shepard turned to leave. "Seeing all this again.... He was so obsessed. Crazy sometimes."

"I didn't get a chance to know him," Shepard said sadly, approaching Ann.

She laughed softly. "Sometimes I felt the same way. He was a great man. A pioneer. But he could be distant. I felt like an inconvenience growing up."

"You sound angry," Shepard pointed out.

"I was angry. Still am, I guess... But sometimes..." she placed the photo back on her father's dresser, her fingers lingering over his face as they slid away. "He was so full of stories he nearly burst. I loved that about him. It's why I signed up for this work. I can't believe he's gone." She sighed deeply and stepped away from the dresser.

"We'll figure this out," Shepard assured her with a light touch on her shoulder.

"We have to. I need to know what's on the other end of that artifact, what he died for." Her shoulders squared in determination.

Picking up in her urgency, Shepard said, "We need your help. You're our last chance."

"You're right. Let me dig into my father's work and see what I can find." She started for the stairs and Shepard stopped her.

"Ann, are you sure you're up for this?"

"Yes." She turned to face Shepard, that same determination painting her face. "When Leviathan took control of me, I remember being somewhere cold and dark, but my father... he taught me to never be afraid of the dark."

She continued downstairs to where EDI still waited. Shepard followed and watched, feeling useless as EDI and the scientist put their heads together and tried to figure out how to find Leviathan. When they moved to the lab area with the galaxy map in it, she noticed James standing near the central table, teasing the husk head. As EDI and Ann discussed data and Ann's father, James noticed them coming in. "Hey, Lola. Need a hand?"

"What brings you down here, James?" Shepard asked softly, not wanting to interrupt the brain trust.

"Heard you're closing in on the Reaper-killer. Anything that can scare those bastards has to be worth a look," He said, but the Leviathan wasn't exactly what he was looking at. His eyes lingered admirably on Ann as she passed.

Shepard pretended not to see. "That's what I'm hoping."

She crossed her arms and listened as Ann talked about the artifact and how it worked, leaning on the table with the husk head. James went back to poking at it. "Commander, you see this thing? This is great!" James poked a little too closely at the husk's mouth and it screamed as usual then chomped down on his finger. "Ow, son of a..." He shook his hand then his eyes widened as he looked up at Shepard who was hiding her laugh behind her hand. "Hey, Lola... husk bites... they don't turn you into a husk or anything, right?"

She shook her head, still grinning. "I've been bit before. Just slap some medigel on it. You'll be fine." She then pulled up her omnitool, unable to resist anymore. She sent a note to Steve to come and collect the head to be delivered to her cabin. "Don't tell anyone," Shepard chuckled showing James the note.

He guffawed. "Nice!"

Shepard finished her note and sent it off then realized that EDI and Ann had finished talking. Ann was leaning on the galaxy map console, her head hung low. Shepard glanced at James whose face had changed to one of sympathy. She approached Ann. "Ann, I know this is hard, but if there's anything more you can tell us..."

"I don't think there's anything more I can tell you, but maybe, I can show you." She glanced up at Shepard, her eyes dry and resolute.

"What are you saying?" Shepard asked, frowning.

"The artifact only sends out a signal when Leviathan's controlling someone," Ann stated. "So let it control me. You could trace the signal."

"You mean let it take you over? That's too dangerous." Shepard said, her head shaking back and forth urgently of it's own accord. She'd lost one Bryson to this thing. She refused to lose another.

"It's my call, not yours," Ann said swiping her hand determinedly. "You said I'm your last chance to find this thing."

"We have no idea what will happen..."

Ann cut off Shepard's protest. "If we wait, the Reapers will get to Leviathan first. I'm the only one here who has spent enough time with it to do this." She pushed past Shepard who had placed herself bodily between Ann and the artifact, her arms crossed. "You're looking for something to fight the Reapers, Commander. I'm looking for the monster that murdered my father."

"We still don't know _what_ we're looking for..." Shepard followed behind her.

"Then let's find out." Ann said with finality, pulling up a chair and sitting down with a huff in front of the artifact.

"Hey, Commander," James said approaching her side. "This thing we're doing with Ann... sounds dangerous as hell."

Shepard glanced at James, her features in agreeance, but she knew Ann was probably right. She sighed. "Noted. EDI?"

"Energy signature locked in. Waiting for activation," EDI confirmed, tapping away at the console in front of the galaxy map.

"You sure about this?" Shepard asked Ann one last time as the woman fidgeted nervously in her seat.

"Yes, I'm sure." Ann said, stilling her legs and looking up at Shepard.

James moved to stand behind Ann, protectively. "I'm gonna be right here," he said.

She nodded up at him, fondness in her gaze. Shepard realized they must have talked on the ride back on the Normandy. Her flirtatious Lieutenant may have found himself someone worth his time. "Okay," Ann said softly. "I'm ready."

Shepard crossed her arms, prepared to talk to Leviathan. "James, drop the containment shield."

James stepped to the side and tapped the green button. "Shield is... dropped."

"Artifact online," EDI announced as the swirling lights returned to the orb.

Shepard eyed it warily, nearly tasting the wrongness of it as its influence permeated the room. "Anything?" she asked Ann.

The woman sat with her head down, eyes closed, still as stone. "Nothing yet... wait, there's something." James placed his hands on her shoulders as she started to sway. "I feel a chill..."

Shepard felt it too, but remained silent. "EDI?"

"No trace yet," the AI announced.

"Holy hell!" James exclaimed as Ann tried to violently shake his hands away. He gripped her tighter as her body seized.

"Signal is tracking!" EDI announced finally as the galaxy map began to light up like a Christmas tree. "Maintain connection."

"Turn back!" Ann spoke, her voice not her own. "The darkness cannot be breached."

"Dios!" James cursed as she moved, making it harder for him to hold on to her.

"Maintain connection," EDI insisted.

"Listen to me," Shepard dropped down in front of the flailing woman. "I found you. And the Reapers are right behind me."

"You have brought them..." Ann looked up at Shepard with special kind of malice her voice grew deeper as she said, "You are a _threat_."

"So are you," Shepard argued. "I've seen what you can do. The war needs you."

"There is no war. There is only the harvest." The demonic voice insisted.

Shepard punched her own knee and stood. "EDI, do we have enough?"

"Partial lock. Maintain connection to narrow the search," EDI said.

"You heard her," James pleaded. "We got enough. I'm hitting the shield."

Shepard nodded. "Do it!" She hadn't wanted this to start with. At least they were a little closer than they had been.

James reached over, trying his best to support Ann with one hand and punched the button. Ann collapsed nearly immediately her breath ragged. "Ah... man.." James said coming around to kneel beside Shepard.

"Ann... Ann, are you all right?" Shepard asked, afraid to touch the girl.

Ann sighed and touched fingers delicately to her forehead. "Uh... yes." James' hand was still on her shoulder and she graced him with a muted smile. "I think so."

Shepard left him to comfort Ann and went to EDI. "Did we get anything?"

"Yes," the AI announced. "But it will take some time to search. Coordinates sent to the Normandy."

"Good, it's a start," Shepard sighed, leaning on the rail around the map and studying the highlighted systems.

"Commander," Ann said, standing and gently brushing James' steadying hand away. "I sensed something else. Anger." Shepard's blood ran cold.

"It knows we're getting close," she surmised.

"I think it want's to kill you," Ann warned, triggering Shepard's own anger.

"Come on," she said, replacing James' hand with her own. "Let's get you some help."

* * *

 

Several weeks of scanning had turned up nothing. Shepard was nearly ready to give up. There had been several missions that crossed her desk and she had taken a few side trips to settle some matters, but her primary focus had been scanning backwater systems for Leviathan. It was mind numbing work. Joker would fly them to a system and she would take the shuttle out and launch probes for days. Her only reprieve was Garrus who insisted on joining her in the shuttle to keep her company.

In between, they traveled to the Nimbus cluster to help Asari high command to deal with an Ardat Yakshi monastery that had sent out a distress call. They had sent several commando units and all had gone silent. Shepard had run into Samara there who was trying to find her two remaining daughters. Shepard wound up having to allow one of her daughters to sacrifice herself to blow up the monastery that was infested with hundreds of the awful screeching Banshee Reaper troops. By her Justicar code, Samara attempted to take her own life to save her remaining daughter, but Falere explained to her, while Shepard held her arms behind her back, that she did not need a building to honor her own code. Samara stayed behind to briefly speak with her daughter and then promised to join the war effort.

The next mission was to the Minos Wasteland cluster. Where Traynor had tracked a group of Cerberus defectors. Among the people there, they found Jacob in charge of the security of the group of scientists who had escaped with their families. He had found love with the head scientist, Brynn Cole. Shepard did everything in her power to rescue over 40 people while Cerberus tried to overtake the facility. They got almost everyone and all of their data out and left Cerberus in their dust. It was a coup for the Alliance to get Dr. Cole on their side and working on the Crucible.

Shepard sat in the driver's seat of the Kodiak, rubbing her temple with one hand as she flicked her other fingers over the console, scanning and dropping probes. She sighed as the last probe she dropped came back with a negative response. They were silently gliding through the Psi Tophet system and she had exhausted her scans of all but one planet. She sighed again and set her course for Despoina, activating the autopilot and checking her fuel reserves. Garrus dropped down in the copilot's seat and arched a brow plate at her. "Don't look at me like that," she grumbled slouching in her seat and crossing her arms.

"Hmm," he clicked his mandibles scoldingly. "Well, as much as I love the alone time with you, Shepard, there has to be a point where you realize that _maybe_ if Leviathan doesn't want to be found..." he hummed. "What is it you humans say? Don't poke the bear?"

He offered her a ration bar and she took it, still slouched in her chair. She drummed the bar on her thigh, her opposite leg bouncing. "If I give up on this, Ann's father died for nothing." She sat up and tossed the unopened bar on the dash in front of her and buried her face in her hands, rubbing her eyes with the heels of her hands. Dammit, she was tired.

Garrus let out a sigh of his own. "So where to next?" He put his feet up on the dash and unwrapped his own ration bar. He'd said his piece and she knew he wouldn't push the matter, but his displeasure with the situation was clear in his subharmonics and the overly casual way in which he sat. She'd seen it before when she'd picked him up on Omega. He was playing cool Garrus.

She sighed again, spinning her chair to face his. "Let me make you a deal. If I find nothing on this next planet, I'll throw in the towel..."

He glanced up at her over his visor like a disapproving grandmother. She couldn't help but smile at the comparison in her head. "You realize now that you've said that, you're guaranteed to find Leviathan on this next planet."

She shrugged. "Then we both win."

He flicked a piece of his ration bar at her with a snort. "I'm certain I don't win if we have to go up against Leviathan."

"Maybe it'll help us," she suggested grabbing her own bar back up from the dash and opening it.

"Here's how I picture this going down. We're going to land, come out of the shuttle, guns blazing. I will be particularly dashing... Kaidan might trip on a root or something. The Great Commander Shepard is going to see a giant 'friendly' Reaper, name it Snuggles and I'm going to be forced to remember to feed the damned thing like I feed your fish everyday." He dropped his feet back to the floor and sat forward, pointing his half eaten ration bar at her. "I dare you to argue."

She cocked her head and after thinking about it for a short period of time, she shrugged and took a bite of her bar. "Your logic is sound. I did name a Geth and let it join my team."

"At least Legion I didn't have to feed," he said resuming a more comfortable position.

"You don't need to feed the fish either. That's why I got the VI," she reminded him. "And Ferguson doesn't take food from you, so I feed him."

"And 'Nibbler'... what possessed you to take that thing home with you?" Garrus asked in reference to the husk head that she had proudly displayed at the back of her desk. It had become used to her over the weeks and no longer would shout at her every time she got near. The only time it complained was if she tried to touch it. Otherwise, it would calmly sit there on her desk, watching her work in relative silence.

"He's unique..." she said in her defense.

"You should let James use him for bowling practice like he keeps asking," Garrus said with a shake of his head, his mandibles slightly spread away from his face to let her know he found her answer cute, although he would never dare say it out loud.

"The last time he came in contact with James, he bit the man's finger," she said with a chuckle. The console pinged, signaling they were coming up on Despoina. Shepard shoved the last of her ration bar in her mouth and cracked her knuckles excitedly. "Let's find out if Garrus Vakarian is psychic as well as sexy."

He purred a response and finished off his own bar before crumbling the wrapper and tossing it in the bin. Shepard activated the planetary scanner and at first, the usual nothing showed up on the radar. She ran her fingers slowly up and down the virtual model of the planet. "This place is mostly water," Garrus pointed out.

After a few tense moments, the radar pinged back a hit. She followed the small signal and released a probe. It zoomed from the bay and raced for the planet, breaking atmo in a blaze. Shepard sat on the edge of her seat, waiting for the probe to throw data back at them. When the interface began scrolling a massive amount of data across the screen, she frowned. "None of this makes sense."

Garrus stared at the readouts, a Turian frown pressing his forehead plates together. "We should probably get these back to EDI."

Shepard nodded, her eyes still trying to catch up with what she was seeing. Hopefully, her weeks of mindless scanning were finally paying off.

* * *

 

Shepard was practically dancing in her armor. She stood behind Cortez as he piloted them closer to Despoina and confirmed that Leviathan's signal had actually originated from the planet. She had butterflies in her stomach like she'd never felt. She was a bundle of nerves and excitement. There was no telling what they would find down there. Garrus put nervous words to her ideas when Steve expressed his opinion of what Ann had done to get them the information. "Makes you wonder what we're going to find down there."

"Bryson classified it as a Reaper-killer," Kaidan said with a shudder. "From what I understand, it doesn't want to be found."

"It doesn't have a choice. We're here," she said, joining the two and grabbing hold of one of the handles on the roof of the shuttle for balance as it swayed gently.

"Right, but then what? It plays pretty rough, and if it's a Reaper, I don't know if that's the kind of help we want," Garrus said with a sigh.

"Nobody says we have to be friends with it," she assured him with a hand to his upper arm. "but if this thing has the rest of the Reapers worried, then we need it's help."

"Commander. New readings from the probe," Steve called over his shoulder. "It's narrowed down Leviathan's location. You're not going to like it."

"Let's hear it," she said, giving one last squeeze to Garrus' arm and rejoining Cortez in the tiny cockpit.

"There's nothing but ocean," Cortez said. "I show a concentration of structures floating on the surface, but the probe's giving us a signal below that. Way below..."

"Under water?" she asked curiously.

"Looks that way," Steve agreed. "The shuttle should still be able to reach it."

"That's possible?" she frowned.

"The Kodiak is specced to nearly a thousand atmospheres... Though I've never actually tested that," he said with a chuckle.

"Guess we're gonna find out," Shepard said with a grin, reaching to pat his shoulder. Her hand never landed as the shuttle was hit with a wave of energy and she was jerked nearly off her feet. "Status!"

"Some kind of pulse hit us!" Steve shouted over the wailing of the Kodiak's emergency signals. "Systems are shutting down!" His hand flew over the controls, but he couldn't get under control. "Brace for impact!"

The shuttle whizzed through the air and plummeted towards the planet below. Steve managed to get them to crash on top of some of the debris that floated on the surface of the water. She, Garrus and Kaidan were knocked to the floor as the shuttle hit the 'ground'. She jumped to her feet as the shuttle skidded noisily along the metallic surface and as soon as they came to a stop, she opened the hatch, ready for anything. "Everyone all right?" she called, scanning the area with her visor.

"Yeah, _I'm_ fine. Not our best entrance, Shepard." Garrus quipped as he joined her outside the shuttle.

"I'm good," Kaidan agreed. Stepping up on her other side.

"How's the shuttle, Cortez?" she called.

"Checking now," Steve said. "I'll see if I can get power restored."

"Copy that. We'll look around." She started off across the hull of the ancient ship they'd landed on. They found several tents set up around the hull, signifying they weren't the first ship to be killed by the pulse. It was pouring rain on top of them and Shepard chuckled, glancing back at Garrus. "Don't forget to tip yourself over, my little teapot. You're already starting to puddle up in there."

He arched his brow plates at her. "Either my translator just had a major malfunction, or I didn't understand that reference, Shepard."

Kaidan snickered. "It's a children's song back home."

Shepard began humming the tune as Kaidan laughed. Garrus shook his head and followed behind her. Raindrops dripped from her eyelashes as she passed between the uninhabited tents. She pushed the flap aside on one and spotted three things, two of which were utterly disturbing. The first, she took out her shotgun and blasted the orb to pieces, drawing her teams' attention. The second, was a pile of bones, obviously more than one person's worth, worn clean. "How old do you think these are?" she asked with a shudder.

"At C-Sec, they always said that the key to decomposition was scavengers. Without them, it's quite a while," Garrus said, grudgingly.

She glanced back at him and saw that the rain was bringing out the shimmer in his skin. She took a moment to enjoy the view in the dim landscape and then turned back to pick up the third thing. A datapad. They found several more of them around the makeshift camp site, all detailing the sad tale of the campers stranded here. They also found several more of the artifacts scattered around. Every time they saw one, they shattered it.

"Can't say I recognize any of these other ships," Garrus pointed out, scoping out over the ocean at the wreckage floating further out. "Just how long have they been here?"

"Look at this," Shepard said in awe, pulling a tarp down off of a rusty old Atlas mech. "It looks ancient, and its not flying Cerberus colors."

"Uh, Shepard!" Kaidan's voice drew her attention and he pointed with his rifle up to the sky. "Reapers. They must have been following us."

Just over head, a Reaper descended to hover hundreds of feet above their heads. "Protect the shuttle!" Shepard shouted as the Reaper began to drop it's troops onto the hull of the massive ship they stood on. "Cortez, situation?" she demanded, opening fire on a group of cannibals that landed about 20 meters ahead of her.

"Swapping out the parts, Commander," he answered his voice calm. "Hang on!" After a few annoying waves of troops, she called for another sitrep. "Almost there, Commander."

The Reapers were there in force. Shepard hunkered down as best she could, keeping an eye on the shuttle as best she could. When the first Brute landed, she growled angrily as she reloaded her shotgun with a fresh clip. "Cortez, what happened to 'almost there'?"

"I had a development, Commander. Fixing it now." His tone was still calm and she charged her overload as quickly as she could, setting up a background process to charge her incinerate immediately after she shot off the overload.

Garrus was already grumbling in her ear over the comm about the Brute situation. "Hey, I'm behaving myself," she said in defense of the fact that she hadn't yet charged the thing.

"So far," he said. "Spirits help me Shepard if you charge, I am dumping my neck puddle over your head."

She couldn't help the snort that escaped her nose. As they slowly whittled the Brute down, circling it and using the multiple angles to keep it off any particular one of them, they continued to be attacked by smaller Cannibals and Marauders as well. Shepard was caught off guard when a husk managed to flank her and jumped on her back. She shouted and spun to slam it into a heavy metal wall on her side. It was persistent, trying to claw at her face. She reached up and threw a biotic punch over her own shoulder, dislodging it enough to be able to grab it by the neck. It twisted and clawed like an animal caught in a trap as she held it at arms length away from her. Calling her biotics again, she slammed it to the ground where it immediately tried to scramble back to its feet. It was too slow. She lifted her knee and stomped her foot down with a shout, crushing it's head. "Commander, I'm airborne!" Cortez announced proudly as she heard the shuttle's engines hum to a start.

"Give us some cover fire," she ordered, checking around for the others.

The Brute writhed in the aftermath of a warp provided by Kaidan and Garrus was handling a couple of husks that were trying to flank him like the one had her. Cortez took to the air and began firing the shuttle's main guns. He took out most of the threats that surrounded them before he shouted and Shepard saw a visible ripple of energy rip through the air and slam into the shuttle. "Another pulse hit me! Flight controls scrambled."

The shuttle careened out of the sky again, landing hard on the other side of the massive ship. Shepard took off at a sprint, heading for the shuttle. "Dammit! Cortez is in trouble! Get to him!"

She made her way across a narrow gap and ran into some enemies along the way. She easily dispatched the couple of husks with a shockwave and then allowed the Marauders to surround her before unleashing a Nova in their midst to knock them all away. The coast clear for the most part, she and the others climbed up to the shuttle while Steve gave them covering fire with an assault rifle he'd stored on board the shuttle for emergencies. "There's a development, we need to talk," Cortez said, as they joined him behind his cover.

"Status?" she asked, looking him over for injuries even as she asked about the shuttle.

"Shuttle's a mess, Commander. That pulse knocked it right out of the air. We're not going anywhere," he reported, waving off her probing hands as she noticed a cut on his shoulder.

"Can't we call the Normandy in?" Kaidan asked.

"Same thing would happen to her," he said with a shake of his head. "And the landing wouldn't be as pretty. I'd say Leviathan has some sort of defense system in place." A bundle of husks fell from the sky and Kaidan reached up over their cover to take them out before they could get up to them.

"Then we aren't getting out of here until we find it, so how do we do that?" Shepard asked, opening the floor to ideas while she pulled up some medigel and Cortez grudgingly allowed her to apply it to his wound.

"Well," he said moving toward the edge of their cover, staying low and pointing. "You might be able to use a mech. Looks like it's rigged for diving."

"A diving mech?!" she asked seeing a set of old atlases behind a closed garage door.

He nodded. "It's a Triton model, Military grade, re-purposed for deep sea exploration. As long as sea water hasn't corroded it, you should be good to go."

She glared between him and the mech and decided if it was the only way they were getting off the planet, she would do what needed to be done. "I'm game. We chased Leviathan this far. Let's finish this."

"It's a long ways down, not gonna sugarcoat it," Steve said in warning.

"I hear you and time's wasting," she said with a pat to his uninjured shoulder.

"Hold on a second..." Garrus said turning from a head shot to a Cannibal to watch Cortez lead her toward the shuttle. "Are we actually considering..."

Steve hopped up to the shuttle and said, "First, we'll need to restore power to get that cargo door open."

"How?" she asked.

"I guess we are," Kaidan said with a sigh.

"These old Ballard Class ships are equipped with exterior power sockets. They use 'em for emergency repairs," Steve continued. "We can strip the cells from the shuttle and use those for juice. Hang on, I'll get you started."

He pulled one of the large cells from the shuttle and handed it down to Shepard. She hefted the heavy battery in her arms and nodded to Kaidan and Garrus to cover her while she transported it to the socket. Three times they did this as Reaper troops rained down around them. When the cargo bay door opened, Shepard raced for the nearest mech. When she climbed in and started it up, it jumped to life with ease, making her feel a bit better about submerging in it to crush depth. It still had weapons capabilities just as Steve had promised and she gleefully fired rocket after rocket at the dozen or so brutes that were dropping in. After what felt like an eternity, she finally felt comfortable calling the all clear. Steve called her over so he could do a systems check.

She walked the mech to where Steve waited by the shuttle and Kaidan and Garrus joined them. Steve opened the hatch to get a good look at the machinery. Then he circled around to the back to check on the propulsion that she would need to get back to the surface. Garrus approached her, looking up into the mech, his eyes narrowed. "Listen, Shepard, I'm all for crazy ideas, but this one is off the charts. I know I promised you an atlas, but this isn't what I had in mind."

She could almost feel his concern for her oozing off him like a physical burden. "We've come too far to stop now," she said as gently as possible. "The way home is through Leviathan."

"Okay, seals check out. Oxygen pressure is nominal... systems are a go," Steve said, returning from behind her. "Its as ready as I can make it."

"Let's go," she said with a nod, feeling her palms begin to sweat inside her gloves.

Garrus' face fell as he realized he wasn't going to be able to talk her out of this particular stupid idea. "But, Shepard..."

Those two words, spoken in that tone backed by a soft keening in his throat broke her heart. "I'll be fine," she promised, wishing she could reach him to at least give him a parting touch from her forehead. He conceded with a nod and she closed the hatch back up to seal herself in. "Engaging systems... Ready."

"Testing comm link," Steve said, his voice resounding over the speakers of the mech.

"I read you," she verified. She fiddled with the controls and brought up the on screen virtual systems that would relay readings to her after she landed. "Here goes." She said with a final glance at Garrus.

The mech hit the water and began to sink quickly. When no water started to seep in from anywhere, she took a deep breath and watched the sea flash by her like a flip-book. It got darker and darker as she sunk, the meters climbing higher and higher as she went deeper and deeper. She tried her best to aim near the probe as it flashed on her radar, but moving the mech forward or backward as it fell was nearly impossible. "Suit holding up, Commander?" Steve asked over the comm as she kicked on the on board lights to scatter a school of fish that she was zipping past.

"Looks good so far," she said, as the communications started to get fuzzy.

"Getting some comm interference on this end. Hang on..." Steve said, his voice barely audible over the static.

"Copy that," she called back.

"Commander, can you read me? We're losing your signal. Something is blocking your comm. Please respond." Steve sounded panicked. He must not have heard her response.

"Cortez?" she said, trying to boost her signal to no avail. "Cortez?" When there was nothing but static, she sighed. "Damn it."

It took forever as she fell, the window fogging up around her as the water outside got colder and colder. She suddenly understood the descriptions given by the people that Leviathan had taken over. Cold and Dark. This certainly fit the bill. The mech finally touched ground, jostling her in her seat, but holding together. The on board light cracked, the pressure breaking the glass. She hoped the glass surrounding her was made of sturdier stuff. When the bubbles from her landing cleared, she glanced around. An eerie glow from the millions of bio-luminescent creatures living in the area gave the place a creepy feel. She checked her systems and found some flares she could fire to light her a path to the probe.

"Not sure if you can read me up there. Looks like I've finished the major decent," she rambled most likely to herself as she walked the mech along the bottom of the ocean, hoping that Garrus would be able to hear her and not worry. "Can't see much from here. Suit is... holding up. Emergency systems have come online. Life support operational." She was already down to 3085m and she frowned at the readings. "Scanner indicates the probe is below my position. Looking for a way down." She walked the mech off a ledge and it fell a few meters settling at 3099. "Shutting down all noncritical systems to preserve remaining power. Not sure how much juice the emergency thruster will need to get me back to the surface... Can't worry about that now." She continued along what her eyes perceived as a path looking for another point to drop from. "Getting some strange readings from the probe. Something is definitely down there." Another drop put her at 3117m and the mech complained at the added pressure. She silenced the beeping and continued. "Reading the probe directly below me. Looks like the final drop." The mech approached the edge and she crossed her fingers. This drop was longer than the last few and she tried to make out her surroundings. "Can't see anything just yet," she relayed. She landed just beside the red blinking light of the probe. "Found the probe. Seems intact." Her depth read 3274m. "I'm going to keep moving." She walked the mech past the probe and toward a small outcropping that led to another drop that she hoped she wouldn't have to make. Her pressure dial was humming dangerously in the red zone. Much more and she'd be in trouble. There were bubbles rising from the depths below as she made her way closer. "What is that?" she whispered in awe as her flare landed miles away and the ocean floor rumbled beneath the mech's feet. The bubbles grew in number and cresting over the edge of where she was standing came two mammoth horns. The horns were followed by an organic body shaped roughly like a Reaper. It lifted up to hover before her, nearly two kilometers tall. She gaped in surprise as she gazed upon Leviathan.

"You have come too far!" a voice boomed inside her head. Things began to get strange as she was pulled from herself and into her own mind. One moment she was in the mech, the next she was standing alone in an empty room with no walls. Her mind fought to regain control and she was back in the mech.

"I had to find you," she said through gritted teeth.

"This is not your domain. You have breached the darkness," Leviathan said.

"You killed a Reaper," she said. "I need to know why."

"They are the enemy. One that seeks our extermination."

Leviathan reasserted it's will and she was back in the wall-less room, this time on her hands and knees. Her chest was tight and she gasped for air. She drug herself back to the mech trying to fight its dominance. "But I thought you were a Reaper," she said softly around a normal feeling chest.

"They are only echoes. We existed long before."

"Then what are you?" she demanded.

"Something more," it said simply. The world around her rippled and buzzed until she was back in the room choking. "Your mind belongs to me. Breathe..." it hissed. Air appeared and she was able to suck in a deep gulping breath, filling her lungs.

When she was able, she stood and before her was a perfect copy of a person. "Ann? What's happening?"

"Your memories give voice to our words. Your nature will be revealed to us. Accept this."

"The galaxy's at war with the Reapers. You defeated one. Why aren't you fighting back?" She asked desperately.

"There is no war. There is only the Harvest," It repeated what it had said before in Bryson's lab.

"Then help us stop it," she pleaded.

Ann disappeared and another spoke up behind her. When she spun around, she saw Hadley walking towards her. "None have possessed the strength in past cycles. Your own species could be destroyed with a single thought." Before her eyes Hadley turned into the man who had impersonated Garneau. "But you are different. I have witnessed your actions in this cycle. The destruction of Sovereign, the fall of the Collectors. The Reapers perceive you as a threat." Shepard was almost proud, although she wasn't certain that the Reapers seeing her as their number one enemy was a good thing for her overall personal health. The spokesman was back to looking like Ann. "And I must understand why."

Shepard pulled herself back to the mech, preferring to have this conversation on her terms, She tasted blood and realized that her nose was streaming. She glared up at Leviathan but before she could speak, back to the room she was tossed. Hadley sat on the floor beside her, as she knelt.

"Before the cycles, our kind was the apex of life in the galaxy. The lesser species were in our thrall, serving our needs." Before her, copies of the cave drawings appeared to tell the creature's story. "We grew more powerful, and they were cared for, but we could not protect them from themselves. Over time, the species built machines that then destroyed them. Tribute does not flow from a dead race." Hadley stood and was replaced by Ann. "To solve this problem, we created an intelligence with the mandate to preserve life at any cost." Shepard followed Ann as she walked briskly away from the cave paintings. "As the intelligence evolved, it studied the development of civilizations. It's understanding grew until it found a solution." Ann stopped short and 'Garneau' appeared. "In that instant, it betrayed us. It chose our kind as the first harvest. From our essence, the first Reaper was created. You call it Harbinger."

"How did the intelligence defeat you?" Shepard asked, hoping to gain a bit more knowledge about the beginning of the Reapers.

Hadley answered. "To find a solution, it required information... physical data drawn from organic life in the cosmos. It created an army of pawns that searched the galaxy gathering this data. There was no warning, no reason given when they turned against us. Only slaughter. Only the Harvest."

"You built that machine to spite what you saw the other races experience. Why?"

"You cannot conceive of a galaxy that bends to your will. Every creature, every nation, every planet we discovered became our tools. We were above the concerns of lesser species. The intelligence was envisioned as simply another tool."

"And now we all pay the price for your mistake," she accused, swiping her hand in anger.

"There was no mistake. It still serves its purpose."

She rolled her eyes. "How did you remain hidden all of this time?"

It finally changed bodies again, settling into 'Garneau' as it spoke. "Our extinction was not complete. Some survived and found refuge in the dark corners of the galaxy I am their progeny. Over the cycles, the thrall races were controlled, removing traces of our existence as we directed them to. In this way, our survival was kept secret from the Reapers. Today, we reach out through the fragments and watch for discovery."

"Fragments? You mean the artifacts we found?" she asked as her question was answered by one of the orbs sliding into her view.

"They provide a window into the galaxy. Tools for exploring the events of this cycle from the safety of this world. Through them, we watch, we study and remain in the shadows."

"Tell me about the Reapers."

Ann spoke up. "Each harvest ends with the birth of a Reaper. Perfect in its design, Each formed in Harbinger's image. Our image. Each Reaper has the power to influence organics. Over countless cycles, this ability was refined, perfected, and gave rise to indoctrination."

"But what's the point to all these harvests?" Shepard asked, wondering how the Reapers thought they were saving organics by killing them.

"The intelligence has one purpose, preservation of life. That purpose has not been fulfilled. It directed the Reapers to create the mass relays to speed time between cycles for greatest efficiency. The galaxy itself became an experiment. Evolution its tool."

"Will it ever end?" she asked in exasperation.

"Unknown. Until the Intelligence finds what it is looking for, the harvest will continue."

"What do you know about the Crucible?" Shepard asked in a last ditch effort.

'Garneau's' eyes narrowed. "We have watched it's construction before. It has never been completed. Those who have tried, still fell victim to the harvest. It's outcome is unknown."

"Okay," Shepard sighed at the less than cheery analysis of their chances. "You've made your point. Will you help stop the cycle?"

"I have searched your mind," Ann said. "You are an anomaly, yet that is not enough." Ann turned to walk away and Shepard grabbed her shoulder.

"Wait!"

"The cycle will continue," she insisted.

"No!" Shepard shouted again. "You've been watching. You know this cycle is different."

"We will survive. You will remain here as a servant of our needs. The Reapers will Harvest the rest."

Shepard suddenly couldn't catch her breath. Had it just threatened to keep her here forever? No. She had to get back. "If you release me, no one has to be harvested."

"Nothing will change," it disagreed.

"The Reapers know where you are. You can't just watch anymore. You have to fight!" Shepard growled, fighting against the hold it had on her. "Even if you survive the battle today, the Reapers won't stop... _ever._ Release me and we have a chance to end this once and for all."

The embodiment of Ann looked away, hopefully contemplating the truth in her words. After moments it disappeared. Shepard glanced around and couldn't find it anywhere. Suddenly, a great fatigue washed over her and her eyes felt heavy. The Ann reappeared and said, "Your confidence is singular."

"I've earned it, out there fighting. Where you should be."

'Garneau' circled her and she turned to glare at him. "It is clear why the Reapers perceive you as a threat. Your victories are more than a product of chance." he disappeared and Hadley came walking up behind her. "We will fight, but not for you, or any lesser race. We were the first, the apex race. We will survive." Ann turned to her and continued. "And the Reapers who trespass on this world will understand our power. They will become our slaves. Today, they pay their tribute in blood."

Shepard's head shot up and she was back in the mech. Every alarm in the thing was screaming at her making the pounding in her head that much worse. She groaned and quickly tried to gain her bearings. The holographic keyboard in front of her was wobbly and unfocused. She managed to enter the proper codes to set off the emergency thrusters. The mech backed itself up automatically to a point where it could make the climb without smashing into anything on the way up and she felt herself slipping. As the mech shot upwards, her head fell forwards and the world blanked out around her.

* * *

 

Shepard had been gone far too long. There was no way that ancient mech had the power to keep her alive for so long. Still, Garrus fought as wave after wave after endless wave of Reaper troops poured from the sky. Kaidan was by his side, fatigue clear in his features. The rain had stopped, but Kaidan's brow was still drenched in moisture from the sweat seeping out of his pores. In spite of his best efforts to preserve thermal clips, they were getting dangerously low. Cortez had left them to repair whatever he could and get the shuttle ready for when Shepard returned. The giant 'IF' floated in the air above them, but each of them refused to say it.

Two Brutes were approaching them from their one o'clock and Kaidan was spent. His nose was gushing blood and Garrus touched his shoulder as the soldier prepared to call his biotics again. With a sharp shake of his head, Garrus handed Kaidan another thermal clip and began to charge his overload.

After a few overloads that arched between the two Brutes, Garrus heard something landing on his 4 o'clock. He turned his head to glance at what might be attacking them from the water's edge and his heart soared to see the battered mech standing, a bit worse for the wear, near the edge of the water. He patted Kaidan to let him know and the hatch on the mech popped open. His original elation at Shepard's return was doused as she fell from the mech onto her hands and knees. Her nose was almost as bloody as Kaidan's and when she attempted to stand, her and the mech both collapsed in a similar fashion. The mech fell into the water and Shepard to her knees again with a sharp inhalation of breath that seemed to be difficult for her to catch. Her knees soon became her stomach as she collapsed further. She was still struggling to gain purchase when Garrus noticed the Brutes noticing her. With a growl he fired on them, trying to draw them off her, but they persisted. Throwing all caution to the wind, he jumped out of his cover and ran toward her, ready to put himself between her and the club hands of the brutes. Before he arrived, however, the Brute closest to Shepard suddenly turned on it's comrade, swinging that massive club and hitting the other in the face. Garrus cared nothing for the battle that ensued afterwards. Nothing mattered but getting to Shepard. He dropped down beside her as she cowered under her arms, awake enough to realize she had been in danger. He grabbed her up and slung her arm over his shoulders. She clutched at her abdomen as he half dragged her back toward where Kaidan waited. "Shepard's back. Cortez, talk to me."

"We're good to go," Cortez said over the comm as the shuttle appeared in the sky near them. "I don't know what the Commander did, but the pulse is offline."

Garrus could have shouted his relief if he had any. Right now, Shepard was in bad shape, unable to even stand on her own legs. He was terrified for her. What could have happened down there? She smelled wrong, like her body's chemistry had been tinkered with. He growled and pulled her along, to where Cortez brought the shuttle down. Kaidan was on their six, covering their exit. When he got her into the shuttle, she collapsed almost immediately, her eyes closed. He pulled her closer as Kaidan slammed the door shut and Cortez took off. He began running tests on his omnitool to assess the damage while Kaidan knelt beside them. Cortez shouted something about a Reaper, but for Garrus, his senses had tunneled to focus solely on the unconscious woman in front of him. When Cortez said nothing else, he shut him out all together. "Shepard, wake up!" he demanded, running a hand over her skin. His readings showed an abnormally low blood temperature. "Spirits, she's freezing." He shut down the omnitool and just as he was about to pull her close to him to try and warm her up, she sat up coughing and sputtering, her head nearly connecting with his. He backed up as she coughed and sighed with relief as she did so sitting up. "You okay?" he asked tentatively as the coughing slowed and she backed herself up to lean against the bench jutting from the wall.

She inhaled a huge breath and he noticed color returning to her cheeks. She dragged herself from the floor to sit on the bench. "Yeah... yeah... I'm fine. Hell of a headache." she pressed her forehead into her palms after attempting to wipe her bloody nose on the sleeve of her armor.

"Never do that again," he warned with a gentle nudge to her knee as he stood.

She looked up at him with a small smile that translated to 'thanks for worrying about me' and he bowed his head in acknowledgement. "I've got Ann Bryson on the comm," Steve said softly from the cockpit.

"Good." Shepard stood up, her voice breathy but she didn't sway or lose color in her cheeks. "Put her through."

"Commander?" Ann said, her face appearing on the small vid screen beside Shepard.

"You feeling better?" Shepard asked. The woman could be on her death bed and she would ask everyone else how they were feeling. It was maddening.

"Yes, thank you," Ann answered with a grateful smile. "I'm doing fine. What happened?"

"We found it, Ann. We found Leviathan."

"Was it worth it?" Ann asked excitedly.

"I don't know," Shepard said with a cringe. He could sense in her body language that she needed to sit down, but she planted her feet and powered on. "But we proved it can't hide anymore... that it's a part of this war, just like us."

"It sounds like an amazing story," Ann said whimsically.

"One for the history books," Shepard agreed with a wry chuckle.

"Well I look forward to hearing all about it." On that Garrus agreed with her. "My father would appreciate this. Knowing the truth is out there... In the meantime, Admiral Hackett has asked me to join the scientific team. We all have our part to play. I should get to it."

"Take care Ann, and thanks for all your help..." Shepard painstakingly raised her arm and shut down the call. He saw her sway and he was behind her, a hand on her back before she collapsed. He guided her back to the bench and she sat, her head lolling a bit. "I don't think I want an atlas anymore," she said, resting her head on his shoulder as he sat beside her.

He 'purred' as she called it, happy to have her back, but he still worried. "Well at the very least, you'll probably get a good night's sleep tonight."

"Roger," she said with a yawn.

 


	34. Reapers on Rannoch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard finally gets some much anticipated word from the Quarian Fleet

Shepard had a headache for about a week and her body was chilled. About ten days after she had escaped the clutches of Leviathan, they received a communication from the Quarian fleet. The Quarians had the largest fleet in the galaxy and if all of their engineers were as efficient as Tali, they were going to need them in this war. Shepard agreed to meet the admirals in the Far Rim where they sent a single diplomatic ship. There had been no word from the fleet for the entire war and Shepard had been hearing rumors that they had called all of their young back from Pilgrimage, regardless of completion of their tasks. Something was up and Shepard planned to find out exactly what.

The four admirals boarded the Normandy and she waited patiently in the war room, leaning heavily on a handrail by the stairs into the QEC. She recognized all of their voices immediately. The same four admirals from Tali's trial. Shala'Raan Vas Tonbay, Daro'Xen Vas Moreh, Han'Gerrel Vas Neema, and Zaal'Koris Vas Qwib-Qwib (she had been warned vehemently by Tali to not ask Koris about the ship name.). The admirals spread out around the holo of the Crucible, Xen's mask pointed up at the half finished device with curiosity as Raan greeted Shepard warmly. "A pleasure to see you again, although I wish it were under better circumstances."

"I had hoped for your support in the fight against the Reapers," Shepard said pushing away from the handrail, her arms still crossed. "What's going on?"

Raan hung her head, shaking it slowly as Gerrel stepped forward. "Seventeen days ago with precision strikes on four geth systems, the Quarians initiated the war to reclaim our homeworld."

Shepard pressed her lips together at the sheer stupidity of the situation. What in the world had possessed them to start this war now? Koris spoke up, accusation in his voice. "Which was a clear violation of our agreement with the council to avoid provoking the geth."

Shepard sighed her frustration. If the Quarians could ever stop their infighting, they might be good allies. In their current state, it was like herding cats. Xen waved her hand dismissively at Koris. "A treaty violation is nothing compared to recovering our homeword and advanced AI technology."

"You're throwing yourselves at the Geth... again?!" Shepard growled, her fists clenching as she fought not to punch a nearby console.

"And this time, we may have destroyed our people for good," Koris said with a lowering of his head that looked like shame.

Gerrel ignored Koris and pulled up his omnitool to interface with her war table. "We'd driven the Geth back to the home system when this signal began broadcasting to all Geth ships."

The Crucible disappeared to be replaced by a holo of the Quarian homeworld, surrounded by Geth fighters and frigates on one side and the Quarian fleet on the other. A green peppering signal emanated around the Geth fleet and Shepard narrowed her eyes to get a closer look. The signal was eerily familiar. "The Reapers," she said with a shudder. Hadn't they dealt with the heretics already? How had the Reapers gotten their metal tentacles on the Geth again?

Koris nodded sadly and Gerrel continued. "Under Reaper control, the Geth are significantly more effective. Our fleet is pinned in the home system. If we're going to win..."

"Win?!" Koris cut him off, outraged. "You insisted on involving the civilian ships, Admiral Gerrel. We need to retreat or we'll lose the liveships!"

"Where's the signal coming from?" Shepard asked, her exhaustion creeping back up on her. Now she was saving the Quarians along with saving the galaxy.

"Here," Gerrel stated, the planet map disappearing to be replaced by one of the Geth's insect like ships. It was gigantic in comparison to the other smaller Geth fighters. "A Geth dreadnought. It can outgun anything we've got and it's heavily defended."

Shepard pushed away from where she was leaning and said, "The Normandy's stealth drive can get us in undetected. I could board then disable the Reaper command signal."

"Yes," Xen agreed, her hand coming up to rub the bottom of her mask in thought as a human might stroke their chin. "Cutting off the signal would throw the Geth into complete disarray."

"And while they're confused, you get to a mass relay and retreat," Shepard suggested, liking this plan so far.

"Good," Koris agreed. "Our civilian ships have seen too much fighting already. Are you certain you can disable the signal?"

"We'll get you out of there safely, Admiral," Shepard promised.

Raan cocked her head and turned toward the doorway. "Our newest Admiral has also volunteered to offer technical expertise."

The door swished open and Tali's familiar purple hood bounced inside the war room. "Tali'Zorah Vas Normandy, reporting for duty," she announced stopping with a hand on her hip.

"Glad you could make it, Tali," Shepard said with a grin. Tali was certainly a welcome sight. She glanced away and addressed the others. "Admirals, I'll ready a team to hit that dreadnought."

Raan bowed her head. "Thank you, Commander."

Moments later, Shepard followed Tali from the war room and stopped her inside the small conference room where Mordin's lab used to be. "Admiral?" she said with a smirk, crossing her arms.

"It's mostly a formality," Tali said with a nod. "I'm an expert on the Geth."

"That you are," Shepard said as Tali moved further into the room to lean on the table.

"Heh... I'm glad you're here," Tali said, her own exhaustion creeping into her voice.

Shepard leaned back into the glass wall, her arms still crossed. "If I'd have known it was this bad, I'd have come sooner."

"Thanks, but you had your own problems," Tali said softly. She turned her head to face Shepard and in that light you could almost see inside the foggy helmet to her features beneath. "I'm sorry about Earth." She pushed away from the table and her whole body turned to face Shepard. "We have the largest fleet in the galaxy. If you can help us, we'll hit the Reapers with everything we've got." She sighed. "Or however much is left from this stupid war."

"I thought you'd support the invasion," Shepard said, sensing Tali's unease with the whole situation.

"No," Her helmet flashed in the light as she shook her head. "After talking to Legion, I thought maybe there was be a chance for peace."

"So why help them?" she asked stepping forward to comfort her friend.

"I'm an admiral. People look to me for guidance. Public disagreement would divide the fleet."

"I'll get your people out of here safely, Tali," Shepard promised, with a pat to her shoulder.

"Thanks, Shepard. And just so you know, I need to keep things strictly business in front of the Admirals. If you'd like to catch up, let's talk somewhere private." Tali warned, accepting the comforting hand and then backing out of it before anyone intruded.

"Sure thing," Shepard agreed with a smile.

"I'm ready to hit that dreadnought whenever you are," she said, squaring her shoulders.

* * *

 

Shepard left Tali to get herself ready. On her way up to her cabin to gather her armor, she sent a message to Garrus for him to suit up. Minutes later, she was down on the bridge, her armor feeling a bit heavy on her shoulders as she donned it for the first time since 'recovering' from meeting Leviathan. "What've you got from the comm buoys?" Shepard asked Joker as he announced their arrival at Rannoch in five minutes.

"Pretty much a big ol' shit storm, Commander," he offered, waving his hand at the console for her to read for herself.

"I have detected several hundred unique ship signatures engaged in active combat," EDI announced, lending technicality to Joker's statement.

"Yeah, like I said," he glanced up at Shepard with a half grin.

"Take us in, Joker," Shepard said, not at all pleased that she was going to be spending the better part of her day on a Geth ship where she knew the air and gravity would be minimal at best. Her palms sweated in her gloves and her helmet felt suffocating.

While Joker piloted them through the relay and into the Perseus Veil, Shepard turned and called her team to meet her at the airlock. EDI used her Cyberwarfare suite to choose the best docking tube that she could find. "All right, once we're aboard, we find whatever's broadcasting the Reaper signal and shut it down." She said, leading Tali and Garrus into the airlock."Tali's our expert on Geth software. She'll be handling hacking and security."

"Good to have you back, Tali," Garrus said, his head bobbing inside his helmet as he likely grinned widely. "Maybe with another dextro aboard, they'll get better Turian food." Shepard backhanded his chest playfully, knowing for a fact that she had personally handled the dextro ration situation as soon as he'd boarded the Normandy.

"As long as it's sterilized," Tali said, her head cocking jokingly as her tone teased him.

"Dr. Michel did get me some dextro amino chocolate. You're welcome to it once we're back," he offered.

Tali took a step back and glanced at Shepard. "She got you Turian chocolate?" There was a snicker behind her voice.

"She said she saw it and thought of me. Why?" he asked, the implications going right over his head.

Shepard stared at him through her helmet, a teasing grin on her lips that he couldn't see. "Watch yourself, Shepard," Tali said, before moving slowly toward the exit door.

"Shepard, there's a problem," EDI's voice purred over the comms as Garrus cocked his head questioningly.

"I'll explain later," she said over their private channel. He nodded and she switched back to the main comm.

"All tubes except one are physically secured," EDI continued.

"I see the free one," Joker added. "Pretty torn up though."

"Too risky for the whole team," Shepard admitted with a grudging sigh. After a pause to gather her wits she said. "I'll secure the docking area. Everyone else can follow me over."

"Okay, we'll just stay here, Commander. You know... quietly." Joker said sarcastically.

She cracked her neck, and rolled her shoulders as Garrus stepped closer and over their private channel said, "Are you okay with this, Shepard?"

"No," she admitted in the private channel. "But it has to be done. No use complaining, right?"

He squeezed her upper arm to lend her strength and she graced him with a wink. The airlock opened and the docking tube reached out before her like a endless rickety tunnel. Holes had been blown through it all up and down and she carefully plotted a path to her destination. It felt like as she walked slowly, her mag boots thumping along, that the tunnel continued to lengthen. She glanced from side to side as she walked, and through one of the holes, she caught a glimpse of the dreadnought itself. "No wonder the Quarians were having trouble. That ship is enormous."

"It is 30% larger than an Alliance Dreadnought," EDI said helpfully.

Shepard continued along and a few feet later her eyes landed on Rannoch. "Tali, you're gonna like the view."

"Better than a vid?" Tali asked hopefully.

"Much," Shepard said with a smile, picturing the excitement in her friend. Tali loved her people and her culture, and getting their homeworld back would be the best thing she could accomplish in her lifetime.

Shepard attempted to ignore the hollow thumping in her head that accompanied her slow footsteps. When she got closer to the dreadnought, she caught herself humming a tune to calm her nerves. Tali's voice interrupted her, the concern in her tone clear. "How are you doing Shepard?"

She cleared her throat, realizing that Garrus must have said something to Tali. "The lack of gravity is a little disorienting."

"The dreadnought has artificial gravity. You should be okay once you're on board," Tali assured her gently.

"Until then, I'll make do with mag boots," She sighed as she came close to another detour around a hole.

"Hey take your time, Commander. We're fine until they, you know, look out a window," Joker said, nervously.

"Geth don't use windows, remember? Structural weakness," she said with a forced chuckle.

"The Geth are just sittin' there saying, 'those organics would never try the no windows thing twice'," Joker mused sarcastically.

Just outside the door, Shepard stepped over a break in the tube and as her weight settled on her front foot, her back foot slid out from behind her as the tube disconnected and floated slowly away. She nearly dropped to her knees in fear as she fought to regain her balance, her mag boot the only thing connecting her to 'solid' ground. "What happened, Shepard?" Garrus asked in a panic as her suit readings got back to him.

She regained her balance and reconnected her other boot to the ground. Leaning on her knees, she took a moment to swallow her fluttering heart and the nausea bubbling up in her throat. "Looks like the rest of the team isn't using the docking tube," she commented, her voice choked and wavering.

"So I'm guessing you'd rather not solo the dreadnought," Joker said, his voice devoid of reaction to her panic attack.

She snorted, trying to forget what had just happened. "Not if I can help it," she answered. "Ask Tali to get on the dreadnought schematics. If she can point me to another docking tube, I'll override the controls and let the boarding party on." She passed inside the dreadnought as the door opened in front of her, thanks to EDI. The gravity inside settled on her shoulders as the door closed back up behind her. "I'm inside. I've got gravity again."

She moved forward, glancing around at the odd shapes of the ship. It was obviously not built with organics in mind. "Great! I'm looking for..." Tali paused as she consulted the schematics. "Got it! There should be a hull breach not far from your position. The nearest undamaged docking tube is on the other side."

Just ahead, there was a large section of warped metal sticking up in her path. She climbed up onto a ledge to go around it. "I think I found that hull breech you mentioned," she said, glancing down into the hole that lead to space beyond.

As she skirted the hole and moved toward a ladder that would take her where she needed to go, Tali said, "Admiral Gerrel tried a frontal assault. We lost six frigates! That tiny hole was the only damage we did."

"I wouldn't call it tiny," Shepard mused. As she climbed the ladder she asked. "Not the way you'd have done it?"

"No, it was too aggressive. I argued, but as Admiral of the heavy fleet, it was ultimately his decision," she explained.

"What about the other admirals?" Shepard asked. She knew Koris had seemed like he hadn't agreed with much of what was going on.

"Xen backed the invasion, largely as a chance to test her toys. Raan gave provisional support. Only Koris opposed the war with me and he was right. We could lose the whole fleet, Shepard."

Part of the catwalk in front of her dropped down as her weight shifted the metal. She hopped the new gap and started to bypass the door. "We'll get your people out of here safely," Shepard promised her again. The door came open and when she stepped through, she noticed the room was nearly identical to the one she had come in. "I found another airlock. I think we're good to go."

"Great," Tali said excitedly. "If you override the controls, we'll be right there."

Shepard climbed up to the next level where a set of consoles waited to be hacked. She hummed to herself, the familiar hacking making her more comfortable with being on this ship by herself. When she finished, the door came open and she spotted Tali and Garrus standing on the other side. Garrus strode in, his helmet turning back and forth as he searched for her. When his eyes landed on her, his soft purr came over the comm. "See any action?" he teased.

"Not yet. I'm sure you can help me find some," she replied, placing her hands on her hips as he climbed the ladder to join her.

Tali's groan joined his purring and she said, "Don't you two get started." Shepard chuckled as Garrus patted the top of her helmet like he wanted to muss her hair even though he couldn't get to it. "Here, let me see if I can get this open. In the meantime, take a look at this." Tali set a pistol on the console for Shepard to take.

She picked up the pistol and a quick scan showed her it was a vastly superior design to her current pistol. "Looks impressive." The tiny pistol was heavy in her hands, but it was a comfortable weight.

"Its Admiral Xen's design," Tali explained as the door she had been fiddling with slid open giving them access to the rest of the ship. "It transmits an energy pulse on contact that disrupts shields and synthetics."

Shepard passed through the door and headed down the strange hallway. "That'll be handy," she said, liking the idea of not needing to charge an overload for every shielded enemy they fought. "So where are we headed?"

"We're looking for an operations center. I can disable the Reaper command signal from there," Tali said.

"Where's the closest one?" Shepard asked, looking for direction. Tali really should have been leading them, but the path ahead looked pretty straightforward.

"Past their defense network and through a sensor cluster," Tali said, a little sheepishly. With a roll of her eyes, Shepard continued forward.

They followed the straightforward path, with Tali directing her as she needed it. They soon ran into some Geth and the battle to get to the operation's center began. They wound up running into a problem when Tali discovered that she couldn't shut down the signal from the operations center like she'd planned. Shepard scanned the schematics and suggested the main battery as the easiest path to get to the drive core where the signal was coming from. Tali faked an emergency to get the doors open so they could access the battery and after fighting off the Geth that swarmed them, they pushed forward.

Shepard took the time to think about the peril this mission was putting them in. "You know, I'm surprised they'd send you on this mission, Tali."

"Even admirals are expected to serve," she said with a shrug. "I'm better at hacking than I am at ordering ships around."

"Yeah," Garrus said, his subharmonics rumbling distaste. "Against an enemy dreadnought, your combat drone would just float there making that... noise." he cleared his throat as if trying to scrub a memory from his ears.

"I missed you too, Garrus," Tali said an unvoiced 'aww' behind her tone.

Fighting down the main battery was a chore. If they didn't stick to cover, the shockwaves running down the battery that powered the dreadnought destroyed their shields instantaneously. Of course, the Geth that guarded the area did not have the same issue. Shepard timed her shots and her biotics with the whirring and the snap that signaled another shockwave was heading for them. When they finally reached the end of the battery, they escaped into a smaller side path that put them on a platform elevator that would take them up to where they needed to go. About halfway up, a pair of geth emerged from a doorway to their side and fired a rocket as the elevator lifted them above. The rocket found the underside of the platform and shook it loose. Tali and Garrus managed to get off the platform onto a ledge across from where she stood. Tali dropped to her knees and called her name. "Grab my hand!" Shepard darted across the platform, her shifting weight making it wobble below her. She jumped up to the ledge and grabbed hold of the flat surface as the platform gave way and clattered down into the space below. Tali grabbed her around the waist and lifted. "Hang on!" With a helping hand from Garrus, Tali pulled her up from where she dangled and Shepard rested a moment on her knees to shake off the brush with death.

"I'm all right," she insisted and Garrus helped her to her feet.

Tali grunted and sighed. "Good hopefully we're done with elevators." A disgusted noise escaped her throat at the situation. "Come on, the drive core shouldn't be far."

As they moved in a circle around the room climbing by ladder now that the central elevator was a no go, Shepard was glad to have this almost done. The shapes of this ship were making her feel uneasy. At the top, they came to a door and Tali hacked it open. Inside, was a large room about three times the size of the Normandy's drive core room. In the center where the core resided, there was a structure that was clearly built with Reaper tech below the shimmering core. It seemed that something was closed inside the finger like pieces of tech and Shepard was willing to bet that getting inside there was the key to disabling the signal. She jogged forward to a console standing before the structure. With her tongue between her lips, she hacked the console to open the arms.

The larger outer layer of arms opened wide like a flower blooming, receding into the floor while the inner layer crushed closed smaller and grabbed hold of a mechanism to spin around and lift up the final layer of protection before sliding upwards. "Shepard Commander, help us!"

Strapped inside the base of the strange prison stood Legion. It was attached at several points all over it's body, it's arms suspended over its head, by thick wires. "Legion," she whispered in disbelief and disgust at the way it was strung up.

Garrus grunted in surprise through his helmet. "Good to see you, Legion. We'll have you out of there in no time." His reaction surprised her.

Tali's did not. "Shepard, wait. The Geth are being controlled by the Reaper signal.

"Right, this thing..." she said carefully, wondering where Tali was headed with her statement.

"So for all we know, Legion is with them. Maybe it sided with the Reapers voluntarily. Or maybe it's hacked," she said.

Shepard shook her head. "Legion helped us fight the Reapers before. There's no way it would have agreed to this."

"Your caution is understandable," Legion stated. "Once freed, we will submit to any restraints you deem necessary."

Tali sighed. "I never thought I'd say this, but... it's good to see you again."

"Likewise, Creator Zorah," Legion said with a bow of it's flashlight.

"So what is this thing?" Shepard asked, examining the structure.

"It uses our networking architecture to broadcast the Old Machine command signal to all Geth simultaneously," Legion explained.

"Then... getting you out of there will shut off the Reaper signal." Shepard's hand was already hovering over the console.

"Wait," Legion cautioned. "You cannot simply remove the restraints. We are secured via hardware blocks nearby that shackle our operating protocols. The hardware blocks are on the far side of the room."

Shepard needed to hear no more. She moved to a small lift that led to the proper console closer to the drive core itself. Legion explained how the Geth had gotten under Reaper control again. It was voluntary after the Quarians attacked. A scramble to gain advantage against the invading forces. If the Quarians had not attacked, the Geth would have still been on their own. Tali was nearly in tears cursing her people's decision as Shepard released Legion. "Got it," she said as she entered the hacking codes.

"Tali'Zorah to fleet. The signal is about to go down," Tali announced as the wires plugged into Legion began to hiss and detach.

Once Legion dropped down from it's prison, it looked up at Shepard and the drive core shuddered and balled up on itself, the tendrils of light condensing together to create a tiny pinprick of light, then released the built up energy in a light shockwave before blinking out. "As a gesture of cooperation, we have disabled the dreadnought's drive core. All weapons and barriers are offline." Legion paused, glancing around as red lights began flashing the emergency. "Alert! Geth reinforcements incoming." Legion backed away and hid itself. Without a weapon it couldn't help them.

Geth swarmed from all sides of the room and Shepard and her team fought through the resistance. As they fought, they picked up on radio chatter from the Quarian fleet. Gerrel was planning to destroy the dreadnought instead of recalling the fleet like they had agreed. "What are they talking about? We're still on board!" Tali shouted angrily.

"Let's worry about the Admirals later," Shepard growled as she sparked an overload into a Prime that was getting uncomfortably close. "Garrus on your two. Cloaked hunter."

Shepard took a shot with the new arc pistol that Tali had given her and knocked the shields down on the hunter. It's invisibility dropped and Garrus cursed and spun to pepper it with his assault rifle. The hunter dropped and Shepard glanced to her peripheral where her cybernetic implants helped her spot another one. She dropped it's shields and then swung a biotic throw at it, knocking it away from her so she could shoot it from a better angle.

They made their way slowly to the door they had entered from, and Shepard ran to where she'd seen Legion go to hide. Before she could call out to it, Gerrel's voice came over her comms. "All ships, open fire."

The dreadnought rumbled under their feet and Legion was forced to scramble aside as a streak of plasma ripped through beneath its feet and hit the drive core housing. The metal structure came crashing down, chasing Legion further from it's spot. "Shepard Commander, the creator fleet is firing upon this vessel. Without barriers, this ship will be destroyed. We must evacuate."

It dashed off toward a door on it's level and Shepard headed in the same direction where there was a door on her level. "We need to get to the escape pods," she shouted.

"Geth transmit intelligences via remote signal. We do not use escape pods," Legion calmly informed her.

"Suggestions?" she asked.

"Geth fighters are docked on the port side fighter bay. We can pilot a fighter to safety," it suggested.

She hastily pulled up the schematics and plotted the quickest route then hacked the door in front of her. As she crossed between that door and the next on a narrow platform, she was nearly blown down as another plasma ball slammed into the wall to her right. In the next room, the entire ceiling caved in to their left, the parts still burning with the heat of the Quarian's weapons. "Shepard to fleet! Hold Fire! I repeat Hold Fire!" she shouted.

"They're not responding!" Tali groaned behind her as she jogged through the dreadnought.

"Dammit!" she cursed, glancing back to be sure they were both still behind her.

"Shepard Commander! We have taken control of docking protocols," Legion announced over the comm as she passed through the door into the fighter bay. She spotted it standing on a ledge not far from her position.

"We'll be right there!" she called as a 6 foot wide rafter fell onto the platform in front of her. She took a running leap to get over the gap it had left, but as her weight landed on the other side, the metal collapsed under her. She fell, hitting the lower platform after her back clipped a piece of metal that was sticking out of place on the way down.

"Quarian bastards!" Garrus shouted indignantly as he and Tali did their best to stay above.

She gingerly got back to her feet, breathing a bit difficult. As she half ran to find a way back up to the upper platform, Legion helpfully reminded her, "Shepard Commander, we can only launch from the upper level."

"Let's go!" Tali urged her forward.

"They're closing the door!" Garrus called from his higher vantage point.

"Hurry! We're losing the environmental fields!" Tali shouted.

Just then, a ball of plasma landed on the platform beside her and the impact threw them all off their feet. The gravity died and she was floating. She reached out an grabbed hold of a nearby fighter, clinging to the insect like ship with all of her might. She watched Legion easily walk to the edge of the platform and grab Garrus and Tali out of the air and secure them to the platform. It directed them to a nearby fighter and Garrus held out his hand to her. "Normandy to Shepard. Reading a loss of gravity. You okay over there?"

"Fine," she answered, her voice shaky. "We're leaving in a Geth fighter. Transmitting rendezvous coordinates." She tapped the coordinates out and then took a deep breath. She pointed herself toward Garrus and pushed away from her perch to float toward him. He took hold of her hand tightly and guided her to the floor so she could set her mag boots on then they moved to get into the fighter.

"Does the storage compartment have adequate room, Shepard Commander?" Legion asked as the three of them squeezed into the tight space.

"We're fine... Go!" she said with a wave of her hand as the fighter closed around them. She chuckled as the fighter took off. "Why officer Vakarian, is that your rifle or are you just happy to see me?" She turned her head and batted her eyelashes through her helmet.

"Get a room," Tali said, crossing her arms as Garrus chortled.

"Just waggle the wings or something so I know which one is you," Joker said facetiously.

* * *

 

Back on the Normandy after her debrief with Hackett, she stepped out of the QEC and into the middle of a miniature civil war going on. "Your unilateral strike endangered us all!" Raan scolded Gerrel as the man stood unphased with his arms crossed in front of him. "I should charge you with treason."

"I was within my authority as Admiral of the heavy fleet!" Gerrel said, affronted.

"And what of Shepard? And Tali'Zorah?" Raan argued, gesturing to them both.

"They escaped unharmed! Shepard, the mission parameters changed. You're military. You understand that!" Gerrel said turning his attention to her.

"I _understand_ that you wasted your chance to withdrawl safely!" she accused, swiftly descending the stairs to stand directly in front of him, using her superior height to her advantage.

"The dreadnought was a perfect target!" he argued.

She narrowed her eyes, fighting the urge to gut shot him with her clenched fist. "This is exactly the kind of shortsighted, bloodthirsty behavior I was worried about!"

"If you could retake Earth with a little friendly fire, you'd do it in a heartbeat." He tried to reason.

She resented his assumption. He knew nothing about her. "You're lucky I need your ships, Admiral" she growled through gritted teeth.

"I've got to get back to the fleet. Raan, we'll talk later."

He shoulder checked Tali on his way by and she mumbled under her breath. "Bosh'tet."

"You must understand," Raan said, turning to Shepard with a sigh. "The Geth inflicted heavy casualties before you disabled the Reaper signal."

"You said they have a planetary defense cannon?" Shepard asked, dropping the Gerrel situation to deal with later.

"Had," Raan corrected. "Admiral Koris sacrificed his own ship to destroy it. He crash-landed on the homeworld."

"The Normandy can assist with rescue efforts," Shepard offered.

"Thank you, Commander. I think the worst is over. The Geth no longer possess the programming upgrades they had while enslaved by the Reapers," she said with a short bow of her head.

"Shepard Commander. We are prepared to offer assistance," Legion said, entering the war room. She had wondered where it had gotten to.

"What the hell is this?" Raan gasped, reaching for a pistol that she didn't have.

"Wait, wait! Everybody calm down," Shepard said stepping between the Geth and the admirals. "It's name is Legion. It helped me destroy the Collectors. The Reapers were using Legion like a signal booster to broadcast commands from the dreadnought. We freed him."

"It," Tali corrected her. "We freed 'it'."

"This is a fascinating prototype," Xen remarked, moving past Shepard as Legion approached. With some study, I may may be able to use it to find a weakness in the Geth Consensus."

"Legion helped me in the fight against the Collectors," Shepard warned.

"So did your pistol. Should I worry about its feelings as well?" she asked snidely.

"I don't think you wanna continue this line of thought, Admiral," Shepard growled stepping again past her to stand as mediator. "Legion is my friend. More importantly, its our best source of information on the Geth."

"The scientific benefits..."

"Are off the table." Shepard stood her ground as the other woman backed up, conceding defeat.

"What can you tell us about the Geth? How will they react without Reaper guidance?" Raan asked softly.

"This is a false assumption. You have cut off long range control, but the Old Machines placed a base on Rannoch for short range direction," Legion explained.

A brief 'oh crap' moment shifted over the room. "The Geth still have Reaper upgrades?" Raan asked, her voice panicked.

"Correct. They are currently disorganized, but once the short range signal is in place, they will recover."

"Keelah. I need to warn the fleet," Raan said. "Xen, coordinate with Gerrel.. Move!"

"We need to take out the Reaper base," Shepard said as Xen left quickly. "Where's it located?"

"Unknown," Legion shrugged.

"Find it," she ordered.

"Understood. We do know of a location of a server from which Geth fighter squadrons are controlled." Rannoch appeared in the holo-projector and Legion added a navpoint that blinked on the surface. "The squadrons are targeting creator liveships. Disabling them will limit casualties. We offer assistance."

"Thanks," Shepard said, leaning on the console and watching the blinking light.

* * *

 

After rescuing Koris on the surface and her rounds that afternoon, Shepard was bone tired. They needed to be up early in the morning to go with Legion to shut down the server that was controlling the squadrons. She shuffled to the main battery to see if Garrus wanted to join her with an empty coffee mug still clutched in her hands. When the doors to the main battery opened, she heard distress in his voice as he called out over a static filled connection "Dad?"

Another flanged voice answered him, fear present in the deep rumble. "Garrus, we're attempting to leave Palaven. We're trying to reach the evacuation centers..."

The voice cut off, drowning in static. "Dad, are you there? Come in."

"The Krogan are helping, but the Reapers are still advancing," the voice broke through the static.

"Where are you now?" Garrus asked, his voice choked.

"Your sister was hurt..."

"Hurt? How bad?" he asked. She could nearly feel the keening that was building in his chest.

"A broken leg. She'll live."

"Dad, you have to get out of there."

"We're trying, Garrus. There are only a few evacuation ships left. I'm not sure we'll make it in time. We..." there was a harsh clatter beneath the static and the line went dead.

Garrus' head drooped and he sighed deeply. She was just about to approach and make her presence known when he began to mumble softly. "Spirits... if you really do exist... please watch over them... let me see them again..."

When he remained stock still, his voice quieting to make way for the worried keen that hummed low in his chest, she set her mug down softly and moved up behind him to wrap her arms around his chest and rest her head on his carapace. She wished she had her own subharmonics so she could coo helpfully for him as he was so good at doing for her. One of his hands reached up to grip hers tightly as he inhaled a ragged breath. She didn't say a word. She simply guided him back to the rear of the battery and sat with him on his cot. He sighed out the breath and touched his forehead briefly to hers before burying his head in her lap. She stroked his fringe, humming a gentle tuneless sound, and hugged her other arm over his chest. It seemed to help as the keening slowed and he nuzzled her legs. She lifted the arm hugging him and typed a connection into her omnitool, directly from the console he'd been using. "We'll keep this open all night." she promised, slipping her omnitool off her wrist and handing it to him.

He sat up and looked at her, taking the omnitool from her fingers and closing his hand around it as if it were precious. His gaze lingered over her face and he sighed. "You look exhausted, Shepard."

She shook her head and stood, beckoning him to follow. "It doesn't matter. News from home is more important. Come on. Let's go upstairs and we'll have a camp out." He cocked his head as if to protest but she pressed a finger to his lips. "That's an order."

He smiled grudgingly, his mandibles merely millimeters from his cheeks. "If you insist."

"I do. Now let's go. I'll get us some caffeine."

* * *

 

A crisp burst of static caught Shepard's attention "hnh," she complained as a voice joined the din. Suddenly she remembered where she was. Her eyes flew open and she took in her surroundings. Her cabin was dark save for the soft glow of the fish tank. Her omnitool sat on the coffee table in front of her a bright orange point of light in the darkness. Garrus was asleep, his head again resting in her lap. She gently shook him. "Garrus, the comm..."

She sat forward as his eyes opened and grabbed the omnitool off the table to try and boost the signal coming through. The voice on the other end was high and distinctly female. "Hello? You there?" More static.

Garrus sat up quickly, his own omnitool activated to boost the signal as he took the bracelet from her hands. "Sol? Is that you?" silence. He fiddled with his tool and more static came clipped through the connection. "Solana?"

"Hey, Big Bro," came a relieved voice from beneath the static. "Dad said he had reached you."

Garrus' shoulders slumped as he let out a sigh. "Are you all right? Where are you?"

A tense few moments passed as a string of Turian curses sounded between spikes of harsh static. "Dad and I...... Palaven... hurts like a..... safe.... made it.... Invictus... The transport."

Garrus grumbled and tweaked his tool again and the signal improved slightly. "Sol? I barely caught that. Are you and dad safe?"

"Yes."

Shepard gripped Garrus' shoulder as he sighed in relief. "Thank the spirits. Send me a message when you can. This signal is terrible."

"Can do," she agreed. "It's good to hear your voice, Garrus."

"Yours too, Sol. Stay safe and get better."

The signal fizzled and Garrus gripped her omnitool in his fist. "You okay?" Shepard asked hesitantly and his subharmonics went silent.

His face turned to her in the darkened room, his features a mess of several different emotions. The one closest to the surface was relief. She offered him a smile and squeezed her hand that was still resting on his shoulder. "Thank you," he said simply.

"I'm really glad your family is safe," she said.

He sighed deeply, his forehead finding hers in the dark. "Me too... I'm not sure what to do now." He chuckled softly. "I've spent most of my free time lately trying to get through to them, outside of calibrations of course."

She joined her laughter with his and took her omnitool gently from his hand. Slipping it back on her wrist, she checked the time. "I think, for now, we can focus on fixing this Geth problem."

"Can you handle all of this after the zero sleep you got last night?" he asked rubbing a thumb over her knuckles.

"No choice," she shrugged. "Gotta save the Quarians from themselves."

"Just be careful. Don't think I haven't noticed you suffering since your showdown with Leviathan," he pointed out.

"I'm fine," she insisted patting the hand that was holding hers.

* * *

 

Shepard felt awful as she raced through the Geth consensus, her body hooked into a hub outside in the real world. Legion had given her free reign to essentially nuke a whole city full of Geth when she deleted them from the server. She had already destroyed the heretics once and the decision had weighed heavily on her that time too. She blasted the Reaper code with her 'gun' that had been virtually provided to her as 'familiar equipment', and uncovered bits of Geth memory. There were truths in this war that had not been provided by the Quarians and it was pissing her off.

The Geth had not rebelled and started the Morning War 300 years ago. What had actually happened was much worse. The Quarians had tried deactivating all of the Geth when they began to ask questions like, 'does this unit have a soul.' The Geth fought back. She really didn't blame them. It reminded her of the increasingly difficult questions that EDI was posing to her. Life was life, regardless of origin and the Geth deserved life. The original Geth had spared the Quarians after they had fled Rannoch, choosing to allow them to live rather than wipe out an entire race. That was not evil. This war needed to end.

Legion had eased her conscience after she'd emerged from the hub. It had taken the Geth she had deleted from the server and dropped them in bodies after persuading them to change allegiances and join under Shepard. Everybody wins.

Their next task on Rannoch was much more difficult. Admiral Xen had designed a laser targeting system that linked to the Normandy's weapons systems. All Shepard had to do was go to the Reaper base that Legion had located, aim at the source of the Reaper signal and EDI would blast the thing to kingdom come. She should have known it sounded too easy.

Cortez landed them a few clicks from the base where Legion was already infiltrating with it's own secret Reaper code that it had chosen to hide from her until the last minute. She still wasn't certain how she felt about that. She stepped out of the shuttle into the bright sun of Rannoch. Tali moved away, kneeling to examine some fauna and Shepard approached her. "I can't believe it," the usually hyper Quarian said, her voice subdued. "I don't think it's really sunk in yet. The homeworld. My world." She stood up from her crouch, putting away her omnitool and gazing with her helmet facing upwards. "Look at the sky. And the rock formations? They used to write poems about them."

Shepard smiled. It was nice to see her friend realizing a lifelong dream, even if the planet wasn't theirs yet, hopefully by the end of the day, this war would be over. "When we're done, maybe you'll write a new one."

"This is Rannoch," Tali said, gesturing outwards. "The world of our ancestors. Our bodies carried the seeds that spread the desert grass. You've heard me say 'Keelah Se'lai'? The best translation I can come up with is, 'By the homeworld I hope to see some day'."

"Looks like you're seeing it today," Shepard said moving to stand beside Tali and look out over the small stream that burbled past in the near silence of the morning.

Tali held her hands up to make a frame. "The living room window will be right... here."

"Something I should know?" Shepard asked with a cock of her head and a small grin.

"I just claimed the land. I know it doesn't mean much, but when this is over... I'll have a home," she explained her hands wringing nervously.

"The Quarians spent centuries as nomads. You think you can go back to living in one place?" She asked.

Tali's hands continued to wring. "We have gotten used to carrying our homes around with us."

Shepard leaned down to pick up a palm sized rock near the stream. With a smile she held the rock out to Tali and when the girl reached to take it, Shepard placed her free hand briefly on top of Tali's in a gesture of friendship and reassurance. When she let Tali take the rock, her friend glanced down briefly to study the small piece of Rannoch. "Well... that's a start."

Shepard had the feeling that after this war was over, she was going to lose her friend to her people and her homeworld. She really didn't blame her. Her team would have been stronger with Tali, but if her friend chose her people, she would never push the issue.

They made their way to the base, which with Legion's help was disgustingly simple to fight through. The Geth had preemptively closed a blast shield over the underground part of the base where the signal was originating from. Legion guided them to the proper consoles to override and reopen the doors. Shepard climbed up to a high vantage point so she could see into the deep hole and pulled the heavy targeting laser from her back. There was a red light deep in the hole and Shepard took aim and painted the target for EDI. "Target locked," the AI informed her and the Normandy swooped in and the Thanix Cannons fired, hitting directly on the red light deep below. The resulting explosion reached the platform she was standing on, in spite of how high she was up. It gave out from under them and she, Garrus and Tali plummeted down to the lower level of the base. Luckily, her shields took the brunt of the impact and it took her only seconds to regain her footing. She grabbed up the targeting laser and strapped it back on then did a visual check on her team. They both seemed unharmed.

A loud wailing sound like breaking hydraulics rippled up from the burning base behind her. She turned to see what the fuss was and a large metallic claw shot up from the hole and slammed back down on the ground. Her stomach twisted and her heart stopped. "Reaper!" she shouted as it proceeded to climb out of the hole.

"We have located transportation," Legion called as a Geth ground fighter pulled up about a quarter of the way around the circumference of the hole.

"Copy that! Everybody get to the ship! Move!" She took off, running as fast as she could to get to the vehicle, her team hot on her heels.

"Damn that's big!" Garrus found the time to comment as the Reaper slowly pulled its awkward body from the hole, its limbs wobbly.

"Move!" she shouted again, her heart racing in fear.

"How are we supposed to fight that thing?" Tali reflected when they were halfway to Legion.

"I was hoping your fleet might lend a hand!" Shepard snapped.

Geth started dropping down from above around them and she ignored them as she came upon the fighter. She shooed Garrus and Tali inside with Legion while she jumped on the top and took control of a mounted turret. The Reaper finally righted itself and began turning toward them, releasing one of their signature whining growls that always turned her blood to ice. "We will attempt evasive maneuvers," Legion stated as the vehicle took off, zipping along the ground as the Reaper tracked them.

She began unloading everything the turret had into the Reaper, but she may as well be a mosquito on an elephant. "Shepard to fleet! It's not a Reaper base! It's a live Reaper! I need an orbital strike!" They drove along, as fast as Legion could pilot the fighter and Shepard noticed them gaining space between them and the Reaper. "We're clear! Fire at will!"

Explosions began slamming into the Reaper as the entire Quarian fleet began to fire on it. Most of the hits did nothing more than stagger its balance, but all of a sudden, the familiar red lightning sparked around the Reaper and it collapsed in a mess of limbs. "What did we hit?" she heard Admiral Gerrel's voice over the comms.

The Reaper laid on it's side, slowly recovering from the barrage. It's front plating was open and exposed. "The firing chamber! Looks like a weak point when it's priming."

"Damn it! Their jamming towers have us targeting manually. We can't make a precision shot!" Gerrel cursed.

"We may escape before it recovers," Legion suggested having slowed the fighter.

"No, Pull over!" Shepard ordered and the fighter came to a halt beneath her.

"Shepard Commander?" Legion asked with a curiosity in it's voice as she hopped from the top of the fighter.

"What are you doing, Shepard?" Garrus growled.

"If we run away, the Geth stay under Reaper control and the Quarians are dead. This ends now." She pulled the targeting laser from her back to a cacophony of Turian curses that her translator wouldn't even touch. "EDI, patch the Quarians to the Normandy's weapons system. I want the targeting laser synced up to the whole damn fleet!"

"Understood," EDI acknowledged and Shepard started across the landscape to a cliff that would allow her a range of movement plus a good angle on the front of the Reaper.

"Do you need assistance?" Legion asked helpfully.

"Just stay down, Legion!" she ordered as the Reaper began to stir. "I'll take it from here."

"Shepard Commander... Good luck," Legion said as if testing out the phrase for the first time.

"Acknowledged," she said and closed off her comm. If she died out on this ridge, no one needed to hear it happen.

Her heart was surprisingly calm as she took up a position and the Reaper regained it's footing. The first shot it took was aimed upwards as if it was trying to blast the ships out of orbit for knocking it down. She took the opportunity to target the big red eye and hope that syncing with the fleet would make the shot enough. The Reaper stumbled again, but did not fall. The downside to the easy shot was that now the Reaper knew where she was. As soon as it recovered, it aimed it's laser eye for her and she aimed her laser right back. She had to dodge it's fire twice before the laser fully painted the target. Fire rained down on the Reaper each time she targeted, and each time, the Reaper got closer. It was right on top of her after five hits. The ground around her was scorched and blazing. Her armor was like a sweat box from the exertion of dodging the Reaper's lasers combined with the heat that rose in waves on the air. With each close call, the laser fire got closer. She was running out of places to hide and with it so close, dodging was going to be difficult. As soon as the chamber opened, she pulled the trigger on her laser and time seemed to slow around her as the heat arched from the Reaper as it's laser primed to burn her alive. The red lightning licked the ground around her, but she stood steadfast, not moving a muscle to make the target as precise as possible. She counted the seconds as the lines on her laser guidance moved from wide to narrow, homing in on the target. The laser blinked and beeped and her target was painted. She jumped out of the way as the destruction from the sky pummeled the Reaper. It wailed and was pushed backwards, it's legs wobbling. One of the hits snagged the mechanism that allowed the chamber to close up around it's weak spot. Every hit slammed into the red light, hammering the Reaper into the ground, creating a crater as it fell. It dropped down, pieces falling off of it as the gunfire stopped. Shepard could not believe her eyes. The thing laid before her like a giant pile of scrap metal. Red lightning shimmered in and out as it's 'eye' moved wildly in the socket, trying to find her. She dropped the targeting laser and moved to the edge of what remained of the outcropping.

The eye fell on her. "Shepard," it boomed.

She crossed her arms and stared it down. "You know who I am?"

"Harbinger speaks of you. You resist, but you will fail... The cycle must continue."

"I killed Sovereign, and now you," she shrugged, her demeanor showing more confidence than she was feeling in her sweaty scorched armor as her hair clung uncomfortably to her forehead and neck.

"We are many."

" _We_ are more. And we will work together to defeat you. All of you," She growled, stepping one foot forward, her fists clenched at her sides.

"You cannot comprehend the magnitude of our presence."

"We might surprise you," she said taking the rest of the steps that put her as close to the edge as she could get.

"You represent chaos. We represent order. Every organic civilization must be harvested in order to bring order to the chaos. It is inevitable. Without our intervention, organics are doomed. We are your salvation."

She heard shuffling on the cliff behind her and turned her head to see Garrus and Tali approaching. With a nod to tell them she was alright, she crossed her arms and turned back to the Reaper. "I have a better idea. We destroy you and live our lives in peace."

"A philosophy reminiscent of the Quarians. Observe the results. We are your only..."

"You... Whatever species you came from, before the Reapers decided to preserve them? They're dead. They died thousands of years ago..." The eye swiveled back and the red went dark as the dust settled around the Reaper. "And now, they can rest in peace."

Garrus approached her from behind as her shoulders slumped with exhaustion. His hand found her shoulder and she turned to look between him and Tali. "We did it. We killed a Reaper. Keelah..." Tali breathed as she looked over the cliff at the dead pile of scrap.

Legion approached them as well, it's omnitool activated. "We can confirm that the Geth are no longer being directed by the Old Machines. We are free."

Tali lifted her own omnitool to scan the Reaper corpse and Gerrel's voice came excitedly over her comm. "You did it, Shepard! The Geth fleet has stopped firing. They're completely vulnerable!"

"Shepard Commander, the Geth only acted in defense after the creators attacked. Do we deserve death?" Legion asked, a hint of pleading in it's metallic voice.

"What are you suggesting?" Shepard asked. All she wanted was to get back to the Normandy and have a long nap.

"Our upgrades. With the Old Machine dead, we could upload them to all Geth without sacrificing their independence," it explained.

"You want to upload the Reaper code? That would make the Geth as smart as when the Reaper was controlling them!" Tali nearly shrieked, her voice high and panicked.

"Yes," Legion admitted with a nod. "But with free will. Each Geth unit would be a true intelligence. We would be alive and we could help you."

Shepard's eyes narrowed. How could she deny the Geth their lives? She had freed the Rachni Queen twice. The Geth were no different. Just because they were made of metal didn't make them any less 'human'. She had seen the truth from EDI and from Legion itself. "Our fleet is already attacking!" Tali reminded Shepard. "Uploading the Reaper code would destroy us! Shepard, you can't choose the Geth over my people!"

"Do you remember the question that caused the creators to attack us, Tali'Zorah?" Legion asked, hanging its head so its flashlight pointed toward the ground. "Does this unit have a soul?"

Shepard steeled herself and looked to Legion. "Upload the code to the Geth. Tali, call off the fleet if you can."

Legion stepped up to the edge of the cliff and lifted it's arms up in front of it. A drone sized spherical interface appeared between its hands and it began to upload the code from its own circuits. "Uploading. Ten Percent."

"This is Admiral Tali'Zorah. All units, break off your attack." Tali ordered as Legion worked.

Gerrel came over the comm, his interference annoying Shepard. "Belay that order! Continue the attack!"

"Twenty percent," Legion announced.

Tali jogged up to stand behind it as it worked. "I beg you. Do not do this, please."

"We regret the deaths of the Creators, but we see no alternative," Legion said. "Forty percent."

"No!" Shepard said swiping her hand down. "No one else dies today! Legion keep going."

"Shepard?" Tali asked, her voice shaky and concerned. Her fear for her people was palpable as Shepard opened her comm back up.

"All ships, this is Commander Shepard. The Reaper is dead, stand down!"

"This is Admiral Tali'Zorah. Shepard speaks with my authority."

"And mine as well," Koris added his voice to theirs.

"Negative," Gerrel continued to argue. "We can win this war now! Keep firing!"

"Sixty percent," Legion announced, driving the urgency home.

"The Geth are about to return to full strength. If you keep attacking, they will wipe you out!" Shepard argued. "Your entire history is you trying to kill the Geth. You forced them to rebel. You forced them to ally with the Reapers."

"Eighty percent."

"The Geth don't want to fight you. If you can believe that for just one minute, this war will be over! You have a choice. Please, Keelah Se'lai." She whispered the last, hoping that the Quarians had the sense to see reason.

After a couple of heart stopping moments, Gerrel's voice finally sighed over the comm. "All units, hold fire."

Shepard released the breath she had been holding and dropped her arms to her sides with a smile. Tali was staring at her in awe. "Error," Legion said closing the interface by pushing it's hands together. "Copying code is insufficient. Direct personality dissemination required." The lights inside it's chest blinked furiously like a Christmas light show, the colors changing and melding to make new colors. It turned to face her and she swore there was sadness on its 'face'. "Shepard Commander. I must go to them. I'm... I'm sorry. It's the only way."

"Legion, the answer to your question... was yes," Tali said softly, her voice wavering.

"I know, Tali," Legion said and if it could have smiled it would have. "But thank you. Keelah Se'lai." With that, it stepped forward and gazed up at the sky as the sun slowly drooped toward the Horizon. It fell to its knees and then to its side and the beautiful blinking lights winked out as Legion sacrificed itself to save it's people.

What seemed like hours later, that really could have not been more than a few minutes, Shepard turned away and began to walk away from the edge of the cliff. She noticed Geth wandering around from all directions, all of them looking around in awe. "Commander."

She turned and recognized Raan limping toward her. "Admiral Raan. I heard your ship made a crash landing. Glad you got out in one piece."

"I was listening over the radio... If Han'Gerrel hadn't stopped...." Raan said, stopping in front of her and leaned over with a hand still on her side.

"He did..." Shepard said, not willing to dwell on the what ifs.

"We've taken heavy losses. I don't know if we can... Where are we supposed to go?" Raan said in distress.

Shepard noticed a Prime making its way toward them. Tali raised a pistol in defense, but Shepard was sure that was not necessary. The Prime stopped in front of Raan as the woman turned to see why Tali was pointing the gun. "You are welcome to return to Rannoch, Admiral Raan. With us."

"Legion?" Shepard asked, a spark of hope in her chest.

"No. I'm sorry, Commander. Legion sacrificed itself to give us all intelligence. It will be honored," the Prime said, hanging its massive head in regret.

"Good," Shepard said. Legion deserved no less.

"And we will honor Legion's promise," the Prime continued. "The Geth fleet will help you retake Earth, and our engineers will assist in building the Crucible."

"As will ours, of course," Raan promised, not to be outdone.

With a nod, Shepard left the two to discuss the settling of the Quarians. She noticed Tali wandering off to gaze at the setting sun and with a nod to Garrus to give them a minute, she followed. "Shopping for another house?"

"Beachfront property," Tali said with a tilt of her head.

"Claim it fast. It's a buyers market," Shepard joked. Tali shook her head and settled down to sit cross legged on the ground. Shepard dropped to sit beside her, knees bent and arms wrapped around her shins. "You okay? I know working with the Geth will be difficult."

"I'm not staying," Tali said with assurance. "I'm coming with you."

"I wasn't going to ask," Shepard said softly, dropping one hand to move the gravel around beside her, drawing a smiley face in the dirt.

"I think you've earned a few favors with the fleet," Tali said with a chuckle.

"I'm asking them to launch an assault on the Reapers. Figure that makes us even."

"If the Reapers were going to stay on Earth, sure. But sooner or later they'll come to Rannoch," Tali reasoned.

"We did just kill one of them." Shepard brushed her hands together, the dirt falling to rest on her knees, then falling away again as she shifted her legs up underneath her.

"So I'm coming with you to stop them.... If you think I can help."

"You sure about this?" Shepard asked.

"Yeah..." Tali's head bobbed up and down. "I look at all of this... This picture of hope and peace. And all I see is everyone I've lost. My team on Haestrom, my father, even Legion. I'm mourning a Geth, how crazy is that?"

"It's not crazy at all," Shepard said with a sigh, her own feelings a little hurt by the loss.

Tali stood and Shepard joined her, brushing off her armor again. "It is beautiful though, isn't it?" She said, sweeping her arms out to encompass the sunset.

"Yeah, it is," Shepard agreed, but her eyes were on her friend and the beauty was in how happy she was to have her homeworld.

"It'll be years before we can live without our suits completely, but right now..." Tali let out a sigh and her hand trembled as it lifted up to touch on her mask. She lifted upwards and pulled the mask away from her face to reveal herself to Shepard for the first time. "Right now, I have this."

To hear her voice without the filter of her mask was a surreal experience. Shepard couldn't help but find herself staring. Wisps of black hair trickled over Tali's pale skin. Her features were distinctly human looking aside from the glow of her eyes and the thin tendrils of snaking marks that delicately trailed up under her chin from her neck, and from the inner points of her eyebrows outward over her forehead. Tali turned her self to face Shepard and a timid smile spread across her face. "I'm glad I could give this to you, Tali."

"There is no one else I would ever want to share this with," Tali said, the softness of her voice still a shock.

"You know Garrus is going to be jealous," she quipped.

Tali snickered. "I'm sure you can describe it in great detail." With a sigh, she grudgingly replaced the helmet then stepped up to Shepard and hugged her tightly. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome," Shepard felt tears pricking her eyes and she returned Tali's embrace. Her friend was beautiful and she deserved to have the chance to share that beauty with the galaxy.

 


	35. Flop Like a Fish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All Shepard wanted was a quiet vacation in her new apartment... no such luck.

Shepard stared at her console screen in shock. There had to be better things they could be doing. Mandatory shore leave? She read the email from Hackett several times before her mind would believe it.

 

_Commander Shepard,_

_I'm ordering the Normandy into dry dock on the Citadel for much needed repairs. She's seen a lot of action lately and needs a little TLC._

_A small army of techs will take care of the details once you arrive, so let's get your crew out of there. You're all on shore leave: that's an order. We need everybody at their best._

_One more thing: Admiral Anderson has an apartment on the Wards. Head over there when you arrive. I hear it's a nice place._

_Admiral Hackett._

 

They had just been at the Citadel a few days ago. She felt like she was sitting on her hands for this war. They were spending more time on the Citadel than she ever thought she would. Her finger was hovering over the delete button when her doorbell sounded. Frowning at who that could be, she called over her shoulder. "Come in."

The door swished open and she stood up from her desk to greet her company. Standing sheepishly in the doorway was James. She had no idea that the large muscle bound man could look so small. "Hey man, how's it going?"

"Good James... you?" she asked wondering what he was doing there. He stepped in side and glanced around the room as she realized he had never been up there before.

"Good. Good..." he said a bit distractedly. He moved past where she'd planted herself at the top of the steps and admired her model ship collection and gave Nibbler a wide berth. "Wow, so this is what I can look forward to when I get my own command."

"You want your own ship, Vega?" she asked a smile brimming on her lips as she moved down toward her couch to tidy the datapads and vid screens that she and Garrus had strewn everywhere.

The big man shrugged. "Yeah, maybe one day. When I'm old and can't fight worth shit anymore."

She took mild offense. "You just come up here to make fun of your Commander?" she asked as he turned away from her desk and moved to follow her down into the living space.

"Sorry, Lola," he said with a chuckle. "I guess maybe I've got some things on my mind. I wanted to get your opinion on something."

"Shoot," she prompted, crossing her arms.

"What'd you do when they asked you to join the N7 program?" he asked, his eyes falling to the floor as unease reasserted itself. "I mean was it a no brainer for you, or did you think about it before accepting?"

"The N7 program is a big deal, but its a big commitment," she said relaxing her stance.

"I hear that," James agreed.

"You get the best training, best equipment, best assignments...." she continued, her eyes narrowing as she studied his reaction.

"And they expect the best in return..." he concluded.

"Yes, they do. Why you asking?"

"Well," he shifted on his feet, another nervous tick. She couldn't tell how Joker kept losing his shirt to Vega playing poker. "even all the shit that's going on... somebody, somewhere managed to track me down and forward an N7 commendation. It's dated the same day the Reapers attacked Earth."

"You don't sound too thrilled," she pointed out as he paced away from her.

"Well, aside from the fact that there won't be an N7 program if we don't win this war, I just...." he paused and hung his head again. "Being a soldier's the only thing I've ever been really good at. And not 'cause I try. Hell, I'd have kicked my ass out years ago. Last time I had a command, I lost almost everyone and they promoted me for it. I guess I'm just not sure if I'm ready to lead again. I don't know if I want the responsibility." His wide shoulders shrugged at the confession.

"You mentioned that before. What went wrong?" she asked with curiosity.

"What didn't go wrong?" he asked with a sigh. He crossed and arm over his chest, the other elbow resting on it to support the hand he was using to pinch the bridge of his nose. "We were out on patrol, checking on some strange readings. Then the Collectors hit. By the time we got back, most of the colonists had been subdued or abducted, including our CO, Captain Toni."

"So you were in charge," she concluded as he continued to avoid her eye contact.

"Yeah. We laid low for a bit, waiting for a chance to strike. But before we could, we were betrayed. One of the Colonists turned out to be a Cerberus spy working _with_ the Collectors. I had no choice. I killed him and destroyed the Collector ship. It got ugly. We lost most of the colonists, and all but one of my squad. Not exactly a text book operation," he confessed.

"You can't blame yourself for being put in a tough situation. And if you were promoted, then something must've gone right."

"Sure, but..." he said.

"If you'd saved them all, would things have worked out better?" she asked.

He regarded her for a moment as he thought about it. "...I don't know. I don't think so."

"The right choice is usually not the easy one," she explained.

"Yeah," he agreed hesitantly. "Did you know that before you joined the N7?"

"Yeah," she snorted, thinking of her time on Elysium and the hard choices she'd had to make to ensure the best outcome. "That's why I was asked. And it's why they asked you. There's not a single N7 that hasn't sacrificed either themselves or their soldiers, at some point."

"So, you think I should accept?" he asked tentatively, her opinion obviously important to him.

She shrugged. "Assuming we survive this, that's a no brainer. You're a damn good soldier, Vega. Don't waste that opportunity."

"I'll think about it... seriously." he said with a small smile. "If you don't mind, maybe don't mention this to anyone else."

"Of course not," she agreed.

"Gracias," he said softly. With another glance around and an adjustment of his belt, he said. "Well, I think I'll get back to the hangar. Things here are just a little too soft for me."

"The bed's a lot harder than it looks," she said tossing her head toward the mattress.

"Are you flirting with me, Lola?" he teased and with a crossing of her arms and a cock of her hips, he backed away from her with a chuckle. "I'm going. I'm going... Thanks again, Shepard."

"Anytime," she smiled. James left her cabin and she went back to her desk. She re-read the email from Hackett and smiled. Her people deserved some down time. They'd been riding hard since they'd left Earth. She opened the channel to the bridge. "Joker. We're scheduled for dry dock on the Citadel. Hackett's orders."

"Aww," Joker's voice came through in disappointment. "I hate dry dock."

She chuckled. "Think of it as a chance to take EDI out on the town while you're on shore leave."

"Yeah, yeah, sure..." Joker sighed and she felt the inertia dampeners kick on as the Normandy shot off toward the Citadel.

* * *

 

Shepard donned her civvies and took a cab to the address that Hackett had given her. On the sixth floor of a very swanky apartment building called Tiberius Towers, the key code she'd been given unlocked the elevator to admit her into the entryway of the apartment. When the front door opened, she was blown away. Her eyes refused to focus on anything in particular due to the sheer amount of swank that practically seeped from the walls. How had Anderson afforded a place like this? As she stood dumbfounded in the doorway, Traynor's voice sounded over her omnitool comm. "Commander, I have Admiral Anderson on the QEC."

"Patch him through here," she said, activating the entry console by the door and sending the system info for Traynor to patch him in.

Anderson's face appeared on the screen, a tired smile on his face. "Shepard." He said her name with a fondness she had become used to from him since she'd been brought back.

"Admiral. How're you holding up?" she asked.

"Day by day, Commander," he chuckled.

"Yeah..." she agreed. It wasn't nearly as difficult doing her job as it must be doing his right now, but she could relate. "Hackett sent me a message about this apartment..."

"I want you to have it." Anderson stated, nearly knocking her off her feet. "Take it off my hands."

"Are you serious?!" she asked, flabbergasted.

"You need a place that's yours... Somewhere to recharge, clear your head." He continued to speak as she turned away and started to explore the apartment. The entry way consisted of a large open space to the left where there stood two full size sofas that were pushed together to make an L around a gorgeous oak coffee table. The scene was back dropped by a two sided fireplace that acted as a room divider. Behind the fireplace was a fully stocked wet bar and another seating area with a big screen TV mounted to the back wall. The outer length of the apartment was one giant picture window. Shepard opened the automatic blinds to reveal the stunning view of the wards as Anderson's face appeared on the TV screen so he could continue to speak to her. "Kahlee wanted us to settle down there. Thing is, the longer I'm on Earth, the less I want to leave. And I want as few loose ends out there as possible. Like I said, you'd be doing me a favor."

"That's very generous," she said as she returned her attention from the striking view to his battle weary face.

"It's practical," he amended with a smile. "We need you in the best shape possible. Rested, focused."

"If you say so," she said, the grin on her face hard to stifle. "Thank you."

"And make yourself at home, dammit. It's yours now," he said with a friendly laugh.

She snorted. "I'm sure I can manage."

"Okay, good." he let out a sigh that sounded like relief. "I've been meaning to do that for a while. I'll talk to you soon," he promised with a slight hesitation.

"Be careful out there, Anderson," she counseled.

"You too, Shepard," he acknowledged and the signal dropped.

She took a moment to let the news sink in and glanced around her new apartment. She'd never really had a place of her own that wasn't either a barracks or an active ship. Especially a place as gorgeous as the one she was standing in. On the right of the entry door, there was a glass wall that spanned a few feet to give a modicum of protection to the garden under that stairs. There were several of these gardens around the apartment and one was even back dropped by a trickling waterfall. On the lower floor there was a bathroom and guest bedroom down a short hallway. In the bedroom there was a small workout area with a punching bag and a pull up bar in the closet doorway. The kitchen was an eat in complete with not only a full size table, but also a breakfast bar that doubled as a second set of burners to cook on. The next room had another small bar and a poker table set up towards the back where an ornate desk served as the barrier to a little office area.

Upstairs there were two more bedrooms, each with their own bathroom. The master suite was complete with hot tub. The closet had a convenient dresser much like her one on the Normandy that could fabricate simple outfits on the fly. Separating the two bedrooms was another seating area with two more full size couches facing each other and separated by another beautiful coffee table. A large loft area around the corner served as a small gallery for some sculptures, as well as a nice place to stand to look down on the wards below. The view out those picture windows was truly gorgeous.

A soft pinging followed by the feminine voice of a VI alerted her to messages. She went back downstairs to the office and pressed the flashing green of the computer interface and a message from Joker filled the screen.

 

_Hey Shepard,_

_I've got a few things I wanted to go over with you. With the Normandy in dry dock, I figured we could meet up at that Ryuusei Sushi place down on the Wards. I hear it's the best._

_Joker_

 

As odd as it sounded, dinner with Joker might be a relaxing change of pace. She went to her dresser and got herself a silky tank in her favorite blue and some fitting black jeans. She'd heard that the sushi place was a pretty fancy establishment and she wanted to dress for the occasion. Her usual hoodie, t shirt and cargo pants would likely not be accepted.

She took a cab to the restaurant and groaned at the line that snaked from the doorway. She resigned herself to the wait, crossing her arms when the maitre'd caught her attention with a wave and a smile. He beckoned her forward, apparently recognizing her and she moved past the other waiting patrons as they glared angrily at her back. The man had a distinct french accent as he informed her that her table was ready. He pointed her to the far back of the restaurant where Joker sat in his usual navy uniform. She shook her head and grinned, feeling slightly over dressed, then made her way back to him. Under her feet, the floor was made of glass and there were fish swimming happily below. The entire restaurant was made to look like one big aquarium. She sat automatically in the chair that afforded her the best view of the entrance, a habit that she rarely broke and an Asari approached to take her drink order. Joker was grinning widely as he sipped on a drink of his own. "Hey Shepard. Not bad huh? This sushi place is serious... Like french guy at the door serious. Only had to save the galaxy twice to get a table here. Did you see the line outside?" Joker was like a kid on Christmas. Shepard noticed at a glance, a woman in Alliance dress blues trying desperately to get around the maitre'd. A server arrived with her drink and she nodded her thanks while Joker continued. "But here I am, drink in hand. Best pilot in the galaxy _and_ a rockstar."

She snorted into her drink before taking a sip. "Any news from the Normandy?" she asked. They had been shooed from the ship as soon as they hit the docks. Most of the crew had gone their separate ways to enjoy their shore leave, but she couldn't help but ask the question.

"Oh, you know, maintenance stuff. It's hard knowing a bunch of strangers are poking around in my ship... uh... your ship," he amended unnecessarily.

"Best thing we can do right now is park her and let the techs do their work," she said with a bit of the same nerves he had, although they were probably for different reasons.

He sighed heavily setting his drink down. "Yeah, you're right... Maybe an oil change, space tire rotation..."

"Right, trust me. It'll do her some good," she hinted with a nudge to his arm. He should be taking EDI out, not treating her to dinner. She wondered what he had called her there for.

"Oh, I trust _you_. Not too sure about those shifty aerospace engineers... Always stealing the silverware." He said sarcastically.

"Let someone else do the work for once," Garrus would be proud as she settled back in her seat and took a long sip of her whiskey. "Hackett's orders. You're on shore leave."

"Yeah whether we like it or not."

"I'm sure you'll manage," she said with a grin and a pat to his forearm.

"I may need a drink that comes with an umbrella," he quipped as he tipped the empty glass in his hand with a sad pout.

"I'm the first human SPECTRE. I'll get you two umbrellas."

"Awesome use of power, boss," he said with a smirk. Then his face shifted. "So, your email said it was important?"

"My email?" she frowned, looking at her glass and wondering if she'd already had too much. He had invited her. "I'm here 'cause I got a message from you."

"The hell? I didn't send anything," he said.

He had to be joking. She lowered her hand and glared at him in exasperation. "Commander!" a voice shouted from the bar area she had passed on her way in. She turned her attention away from Joker to see the same woman who had been trying to get around the maitre'd stumbling her way through the crowd and hailing her, bumping nervously into just about every one on her way. She dropped a data pad and then apologized to the Turian she'd run into as she retrieved it. "Commander this is urgent."

"I don't think that's the umbrella lady," Joker quipped with a sigh. He'd realized the same as her that shore leave was just about to get interesting.

The woman stopped in front of their table, flushed and breathless. Her dark skin and pointed nose made her wide eyes look almost comical as she nervously addressed Shepard, forgetting to salute and then apologizing profusely. "I'm staff analyst Maya Brooks. There are people trying to kill you."

Shepard exchanged a glance with Joker who had a sarcastic grin on his face. "Yeah... I think she's aware of that," Joker pointed out. With this war on, there was hardly anyone in this universe that didn't want her dead.

Brooks sighed. "No, I don't mean Cerberus and the Reapers. I mean other people. New people. They're... it's..." she sighed in frustration. Shepard set her glass down and looked up at Brooks. "Someone is hacking your accounts. Comm channels, personal records They're targeting you, specifically." Joker looked at Shepard, his eyes widening at the information.

Shepard narrowed her eyes and felt the anger wash over her. "Big mistake."

"Oh, man, there's the angry face," Joker said a hint of fear in his tone as he tried to play off the threat in his usual manner.

She ignored him and folded her hands calmly on the table. "From the top. What do you know?" She regarded the nervous Brooks and her flesh prickled as she caught movement at the door out of the corner of her eyes.

She watched as a group of heavily armed and armored men punched out the maitre'd who helplessly tried to bar their entrance. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen," One of the men announced holding up a nasty looking assault rifle. "Tonight's performance is brought to you by random acts of violence." With that he pointed the rifle to the roof and fired off some rounds to frighten the rest of the patrons. Screams sounded all around as innocents ducked for cover or fled. Shepard grabbed Joker and flipped their table so they were covered, kneeling behind the too thin bit of wood as the mercenaries made a mess of the place while chasing out all of the innocents. At least they weren't doing any collateral damage so far. "Man I love show business," the same man shouted happily at the destruction. "Spread out boys. Find me Shepard."

 _Damn it_. She wasn't even armed. _Stupid._ She heard Garrus' voice in her head as she tried to formulate a plan. She peered warily up over the table to get a headcount on the bad guys. "Joker," she hissed, ready to give him orders to get him to safety.

"Ow, my pancreas," he hissed back, clearly unharmed.

Shepard heard shuffling around the table and a muffled 'hey' as Brooks was found and they dragged her off to the front of the restaurant. Shepard cursed again "Dammit!" She put a steadying hand on Joker's shoulder. "Find the crew. I'm going after her." Her plan was set and as bad as it sounded, she needed Joker.

"Find the crew, got it," he whispered and then moved off toward the emergency exit in direct sight of the front of the restaurant.

She stayed hidden and listened. "Hey," shouted one of the mercs when he spotted Joker. She sighed in relief as she saw the lift so it was positioned over the table. She reached up and grabbed the gun, wrenching the man's wrists and flipping him over the table while she called her biotics to smash his helmet. With the man incapacitated, she took his pistol and checked the chamber. The thermal clip was small, but it had a modified barrel that looked like it would blow someone's head straight off their shoulders.

"You used me as bait!?" Joker complained, indignantly.

"Go!" she shooed him as she settled into a comfortable crouch to fire around the table.

"You used me as bait!" he said again as he shuffled out the emergency exit. "You see that... savior of the Citadel uses brittle bones guy as bait." The door closed behind him and she sighed again, shaking her head.

She glanced out of her cover and the rest of the mercs were milling about the restaurant, trying to find her. The place was now deserted save for them and a banged up Brooks abandoned near the entrance. Shepard targeted the nearest merc and with two quick taps to the trigger, he fell dead. She took a moment to be impressed with the power of the tiny pistol coupled with the silencer and lack of debilitating kickback, before sighting her next target. When the second merc fell, the others realized that someone was taking them out. Panic ensued through the group while she used the chaos to pick more of them off. She moved her way toward Brooks and when she saw the place was clear, she shoved the gun into her tight waistline and helped Brooks to her feet. Suddenly, Brooks shoved her, knocking her down just as she saw the laser sight targeting her bare chest. Brooks took the bullet in the shoulder and fell as more peppering of bullets hit the floor near Shepard, cracking the glass. A perfect 'oh shit' from Shepard was cut off as she dodged another round of bullets that found the floor instead of her. The glass beneath her shattered and she had seconds to shout before she was submerged in the aquarium. The bottom broke out below her and she and all of the fish went tumbling. She reached out as she fell, trying to gain purchase on a column of neon lights that snapped under the pressure of her weight until finally she was slowed enough to grab hold of one. She dangled for a few seconds as the water poured down on her. Then she attempted to get a foothold, but her tennis shoes slipped in the wet and the light under her feet snapped in two, jarring her from her hand hold. She fell again, slamming into a slight incline that was barely more angled than a straight wall and she caught a glimpse of the abyss below as she rolled her only chance was the triangular window pane that was sticking out at an angle a few feet below. She forced her body closer as she rolled, reaching out and bracing herself as best she could to grab a hold. Her muscles were jarred as her weight and grip snapped her to a stop. Her shoulder wrenched, making it difficult to hold on. She was barely able to catch her breath before the pieces of neon light followed her down, pelting her and the window she clung to. She shouted as the window jerked and her hand slipped dropping her again. She went over the edge of the incline and dropped painfully onto a ledge. She laid on her front, shivering and soaked from her trip through the aquarium. Her body ached miserably from the abuse of the fall and she was certain that her shoulder was dislocated. Water still trickled down on her as she gathered herself to stand up, spotting the pistol a few feet away that had escaped her waist band. All around her, the neon sign pieces floated on the small puddle forming on the ledge. She grabbed up the pistol and shakily got to her feet.

Her comm buzzed in her ear. "Commander, I found a secure terminal are you okay down there?" Brooks practically shouted.

"Yep," Shepard grunted sarcastically, taking in her surroundings. "Feelin' good." She had landed on a maintenance platform. As she made her way to a door that would take her to a suspended back alley on this level, she said in a choked voice around her battered chest. "Brooks. You got hit."

"I know!" the woman said, her voice high pitched. "I used medi gel. A lot of it... Um, all of it, actually." Shepard made her way across the catwalks of the alley, painfully jumping across gaps and up and down ladders, trying to find a way back onto the Wards. "Everything is a little bit bouncy."

"I think you used too much," Shepard said with a half chuckle and half sigh.

"So, can I help with anything?" she offered, helpfully.

"Alert C-Sec. I'll look for a way out," Shepard grumbled, pausing on a platform across from a docking bay. "Brooks I see some skycars across the gap, maybe a landing pad." Brooks ran an analysis of the area and informed her that it was a skycar lot. "Get a shuttle over there. I'll find a way across." She turned and went through a door nearby that led into a frozen storage for a restaurant. A Salarian on a smoke break eyed her warily as she smiled awkwardly at him and passed through the storage and onto some more rooftops.

"So..." Brooks' voice came through again. "Um it turns out C-Sec has the whole area locked down. It's gonna be a tiny bit tricky to get you a shuttle."

"Keep at it Brooks," she ordered, her patience growing thin as her body ached. She hugged her injured arm to her side and every jump across a gap she made, jarred the muscle.

"Oh, also, stay off your comm. Accept for me. It's hacked. That's probably how they found you." Brooks warned.

"Who are these guys?" Shepard mused, slightly impressed with how they'd so thoroughly hacked into her life.

"I don't know, but they really don't seem to like you."

"Yeah, I'm sensing that," Shepard grunted.

She came to a ladder that led from where she was down to a small open air market below. She paused, catching sight of some more mercs dressed in the same gear as the ones at Ryuusei. She knelt down and aimed the pistol, taking out two of them before they noticed. She slid down the ladder and quickly took up position behind one of the stalls. A welcome voice purred in her ear over the comms as she sighted down her next target. "Shepard, can you hear me? You okay?" Garrus sounded out of breath. He must have been making his way to her. His voice was full of panic.

"I'm fine," she assured him. "Might need a little back up though."

"Lucky for you, Archangel is your boyfriend," he said, the relief seeping into his tone. "Joker filled me in. I'm on foot. I'll be there as fast as I can."

Brooks interrupted. "Excuse me, who is this? You're on an unsecured channel and you're putting Commander Shepard in danger."

Shepard could almost hear Garrus bristling as he responded. "I'm doing what? Who is this?"

Shepard sighed as she picked off a couple more mercs and moved forward. "Hang on. Joker mentioned staff analyst Brooks, yes? That's her. Everybody play nice."

She made her way through the market, under fire from the mercs and their pesky drones that kept trying to flank her. After she crossed the edge of the market and came across a handy pile of thermal clips at the feet of a dead sniper, another voice came over her comm. "Liara here. I just heard. All of us are on our way."

"Good to hear... Things are a bit... dicey," she chuckled to herself over her own pun as she passed by a deli stand.

"Why am I not surprised?" Liara sighed over the comm.

Shepard hacked her way through a locked door with her SPECTRE codes and because of the C-Sec lock-down, alarms began screeching all around. She grumbled and took cover as the alarms gave away her location. "Dammit!"

"Shepard!" Garrus' voice was panicked again. "What's happening? I heard that from here."

"It's all under control," she said with a chuckle at his tone. It probably shouldn't be funny, but the situation was making her a little slap happy. She ached all over, she was freezing in her still wet clothes and her tennis shoes sloshed with every step she took. She was crouched behind a row of seating outside the stores along the strip of mall that would lead her to the car lot. If she didn't laugh, she might just cry. Even shore leave was trouble when you were Commander Shepard.

"There are alarms going off across the boards. What's happening?" Liara asked.

"Thought I'd make things more interesting," she snarked.

"We need to sit down and have a chat about your methods," the Asari said, her breathy voice exasperated.

"Shepard, Brooks sent me the nav point for the skycar lot," Garrus purred. "Meet ya there."

"Good," she agreed, firing off her overload into one of the drones before it got close enough to do any real damage.

"What do we know about the mercs?" he asked over a slew of gunfire wherever he was.

"They have guns and don't like me," she said, ducking back behind her cover as a bullet slapped into the fabric of the couch beside her face.

"Not helping, Shepard," he chided.

"Commander, it would really be great if you could stay off the comm," Brooks reminded her.

"Hey, they called me," she retorted, taking out a merc then reloading.

When she got to the far end of the strip, Brooks informed her that there was a C-Sec shuttle on the way for her. She hacked her way through the door, gun ready, but it wasn't needed. She stopped in her tracks as she saw the backs of two of the mercs, completely focused on the raging Turian ahead. They didn't stand a chance as he tossed a flash bang grenade into their midst and it blew them apart, so he could snipe a third merc that was trying to spawn one of the drones that she had found particularly effective. The other two were quickly recovering from the grenade and he vaulted his cover and used his hand to hand training to get in close and snap one neck then take out the other's knee before cracking him in the skull with the butt of his rifle. Spotting her Garrus slung his Widow over his shoulder, and cocked a hip to grin at her. "So... Having a bad day, Shepard?"

"You could say that." She approached him wearily, but with a stupid smile on her face.

"Landing pad is just over there," he said, cocking a thumb behind him. "but it's behind a locked gate."

"Let's look for a control panel," she said, moving past him to get to the offices behind a row of pristine floor model skycars.

His head cocked to follow her progress and he purred. "Nice outfit." She glanced down at her blue silk tank that revealed the obvious chill she was feeling and flushed. He cleared his throat and chuckled painfully at her reaction. "Control panel... right." She smirked and shook her head before turning away again and continuing toward the office door. "Word is you fell through a fish tank," he prodded as he followed behind her.

"We'll talk about it later," she insisted, trying not to think about the ridiculousness of the whole situation.

"Damn shame," he teased. "Great food there."

"We'll talk about it later," she said more slowly with a tease in her own voice. The office door was irritatingly locked and she pulled back in annoyance before aiming her pistol. "Stand back."

Garrus hummed and set a hand on top of the pistol to lower her arms. "Hold on." He moved to tap on the glass window where she could make out a volus cowering on the other side. "Hi there. uh... could you open this up?" Moments later, the garage doors opened to reveal the landing pad. And Garrus called a "Much appreciated," in to the Volus

"Please leave," the Volus sputtered through his breathing apparatus, before Garrus glanced at her with a mixture of a smirk and a chiding rise of his brow plates and strutted off cooly.

"Well, I could have done that," she muttered.

She followed him to the opened gates and onto the landing pad. A C-Sec shuttle came in to hover over the landing pad. The hatch opened up and she gasped as she recognized, not C-Sec agents, but more of the mercs. A whirring sounded that told her there were machine guns involved. She grabbed Garrus and pulled him with her as she scurried to crouch behind a large advertisement kiosk nearby. The machine guns hammered relentlessly at their backs before she heard a loud shout from over head. She glanced up to see shattering glass and a red streak fly out the windows above. Wrex's 800 pound body slammed down on the shuttle, knocking it onto the landing pad and out of the sky. The gunfire stopped and she risked a glance around the kiosk to watch as he ran over the shuttle and dropped down in front of the mercs. They tried to scatter, and he slammed his body into one of them smashing him against the hatch on the other side of the shuttle. The second he grabbed as the first crumbled and headbutted the poor guy through his helmet. The third he gut punched and the fourth stood staring in awe before Wrex grabbed him by the front of his armor and opened the outer hatch to toss him over the edge. Wrex kicked the writhing man he'd gut shotted out the hatch to follow the other.

Brushing his hands off, he turned and picked up one of the machine guns. Shepard stood up and grinned wide. "Wrex... what're you doing here?"

"Ah..." he grunted. "Butting heads with the council over Krogan expansion." He tossed the gun to her and she caught it, testing it's weight. An explosion inside the car lot made her turn and she sighed, retaking a paltry cover behind the other side of the kiosk. "Shepard, we got a way out of here?"

"Wrex, I'm a professional," she stated firing the machine gun on the advancing mercs.

"That's not a yes," he grumbled glowing blue as he called his biotics.

"It's not a no," she pointed out. As they fought the seemingly endless mercs that continued to pour in from over head, Joker contacted her to let her know he was on his way with Brooks. The nervous Alliance analyst tried to question her, but Shepard shot her down with an irritated, "We're a little busy right now."

Minutes later, Joker announced they were there. She spun and darted from her cover to the hovering Kodiak behind her. Wrex was already hopping in and Garrus waited at the outside giving her covering fire as she jogged toward him. He climbed on the shuttle and gave her a hand up as she hopped in last. The shuttle door closed behind her and she gave Joker the address for the apartment before dropping down into a chair.

Her arm hung limply at her side and she dropped the heavy machine gun to the ground as she let her head fall to rest on the wall behind her, closing her eyes. "That shoulder needs fixing," Garrus said moving to kneel in front of her. She whimpered at the idea as he reached for her, but with a chiding smile coupled with a growl in his subharmonics that told her she had better cooperate, she allowed him to prod the painful dislocation. He gripped her shoulder and pressed his other hand over her chest. When he got a good handle on where the socket was, he looked at her regrettably. "Ready?" With a grudging nod, she tried to brace herself as he counted from 3. Before he reached 1, he wrenched the damaged joint back into place and she heard a sickening pop before the bolt of pain pulled a cry from her throat. "I'm sorry," he said, pulling her against him in a hug.

She shuddered, as the pain ebbed and her teeth began to chatter as the cold caught up with her. "This is the last time I get gussied up to meet Joker," she quipped around the chattering.

Wrex grabbed the emergency kit from the wall and tossed a blanket to Garrus. He wrapped her gently then sat beside her to lend what warmth he could through his armor. "That's just the shock talking," Joker called from the cockpit. She flipped him off with her good hand and he let out an amused chuckle.

They arrived back at her apartment in minutes and she fiddled with the entry console with her shaking fingers. When she finally got the door open, Garrus followed her in with an impressed whistle. She paused a moment, wondering how he was able to whistle and he winked at her, reading her question and gestured to his throat. It was a subharmonic? Now she was impressed.

Brooks brushed past them all to flop down on the nearest couch like she was going to have a nervous breakdown. "Someone wanna tell me what's going on here?" Wrex boomed as he stopped behind where Brooks was sitting.

"I didn't recognize those mercs," Garrus pointed out as Shepard moved to stand beside the blazing fireplace, discarding the blanket on the back of a recliner chair. "Heavily armed and using C-Sec shuttles."

"I dunno," she agreed, hugging herself. "I've never seen them before."

"I can't believe you survived all that. They had guns and grenades and those drone things," Brooks burst out.

"It's okay. I'm calling Commander Bailey, see what's going on with C-Sec." She pulled up her omnitool, but Brooks waved her hands.

"Wouldn't that just make whoever you contacted a target, too?"

"She's right, Shepard," Garrus agreed. "Until we figure this out, it's a big risk."

"Okay... for now, we run this ourselves," she agreed with a sigh, dropping her arm and shutting off her omnitool.

"Right, ourselves," Brooks said, her hands wringing. "On our own. Outside the law. Okay, yeah..."

"Brooks, it's okay... I know this is a lot to deal with," Shepard said softly, sensing the breakdown in the nervous woman.

"I got shot! I've got medi gel, but still, I took a desk job explicitly to not get shot. And _you_ killed a hundred guys with a _pistol_!" The woman accused, standing and pointing a finger at Shepard.

"Well, yes, that did happen," she admitted with a painful shrug.

Brooks dropped her finger and sighed. "I mean, who does that? Well, you I guess, but besides you? They said the medigel might make me jumpy. Do I seem jumpy?"

"How'd you get mixed up in all of this?" Shepard asked crossing her arms and regarding the naive analyst.

"I monitor data for Alliance Intel to prevent fraud and hacking of officer IDs. Like... uh... someone using an Admiral's pass to get into a nightclub on the Citadel when that Admiral is fighting on Tuchanka? I wrote a tracking program. It's really neat. I named it 'Mr. Biscuits', after my cat."

The woman's rambling was making Shepard's head spin so she lifted her hand and calmly stopped her. "Brooks..."

"Right! Sorry... Anyway, 'Mr. Bis...' uh... my program detected a breach in your classified files. Soon, everything we had on you was compromised... Personnel files, mission reports, everything..." Brooks explained.

Wrex growled, his lip quivering. "Since when does hacking personnel records involve heavy weapons fire?"

"Think of what criminals could do if they had Shepard's military access codes or SPECTRE codes, even." Brooks pointed out, making Shepard's stomach wrench.

"Explains why they need you dead, Shepard," Wrex said, making Garrus bristle. "Nothing to stop them until the damage is done."

"I guess we're back on the clock," she sighed angrily. Couldn't she ever get some time to relax?

Garrrus shuffled his feet. "And when this is over, I'm sure we'll find something to do... off the clock."

"Okay, ideas on where to start with these guys?" she prompted after a short smile and a wink for Garrus.

"Well, I was looking at that pistol you picked up," Garrus purred in reaction to her tone.

She pulled the gun in question from her waistband and Wrex nodded. "For such a tiny thing, it packs a punch. Never seen anything like _it_ before."

"Let me see it..." Liara let herself in and approached them from the doorway, her omnitool already glowing and Glyph, her info drone, already hovering at her side. "I might be able to help... Glyph."

"I'll begin collating relevant intel for review, Dr. T'Soni," Glyph intoned.

"Liara," she said in greeting with a thankful grin.

"Shepard, I'm relieved to see you're in one piece. A shame about the Sushi place though. It was a favorite.." her tone was teasing.

"I hear that," Shepard said, scratching her still damp hair and nervously brushing her hands down her arms while her cheeks flushed pink. The whole situation was embarrassing.

"All right, Liara's on point. What about the rest of the crew?" Wrex asked.

"Yeah, what about those slackers?" Joker quipped as he let himself in as well. He'd taken the shuttle to pick up the others after dropping them off.

"Joker, you've been busy," Shepard said approaching him to meet his limping halfway.

"Well, I found some folks who actually like being shot at," he grinned as the rest of the crew followed him in the open door.

"Permission to come aboard, Shepard," Kaidan quipped. She could already see the teasing in his smile. She rolled her eyes and motioned for everyone to make themselves at home while Liara and Glyph tried to gather some data on the pistol.

She hugged herself and headed toward the back stairs to go to her dresser and get a change of clothes. Joker stopped her briefly with a small grin. "Later when this is all over with we are gonna have a talk about this bait thing."

She snorted, her lips pursed. "Yeah, I'll slip it into my schedule... and maybe buy you a real dinner."

"Oh, so being bait does have perks," he chuckled as she turned and walked away. Garrus was not far behind.

He followed her silently up stairs and waited as she dried herself off and changed back into her usual clothes that were strewn on the floor beside the dresser. While she toweled her hair, wishing she had a brush, he grinned at her. "So, what was it, Shepard, five minutes before someone started shooting at you? On the other hand, we get this cool secret hideout to hang out in. Unless, the bad guys look in the window."

She let out a short, unamused chuckle. "Yeah, I was just thinking how I can't even go out to dinner without incident. How in the universe you put up with being my boyfriend is beyond me."

"I like to think I'm the lucky one," he said. "How's the shoulder?"

"Sore," she admitted, rolling the offending appendage. "But, I'll live."

"And that's what matters," he said touching his forehead briefly to hers.

One of the nearby stereo speakers hissed and Liara's voice hummed out. "I think I've found something."

"Let's go see what the Shadow Broker found out about these assholes," Shepard sighed. Garrus ran fingers through her matted hair, smoothing the still damp rat's nest then knuckled her chin playfully.

* * *

 

"We have a lead," Liara said excitedly as Shepard and the others gathered around the dining room table that had a built in holo-projector beneath the sliding glass of the center piece. "I called in some favors to run a trace on the gun. It led me to a casino owner named Elijah Khan. He's been suspected of using his profits to smuggle weapons onto the Citadel... Immediately after the attempt on Shepard's life, Khan made an interesting call." Liara pulled up an audio recording of a call between the casino owner and another voice that was heavily modified. Apparently the hubbub had made the news and Khan was more than a little peeved that his merchandise was seen on the television.

"So that's our identity thief," Shepard sighed at the inability to figure out who the voice belonged to.

"Looks like he's got an ID disguiser," Garrus agreed with a thoughtful hum. "Those things are a pain in the ass to get around."

"Did you get anything on the mercenaries that attacked us?" Shepard asked.

"They're a private military corporation called Cat-6. As most of you know, Cat-6 is an Alliance nickname for dishonorable discharges. Many have criminal records, histories of steroid abuse, and... other... charming features. No doubt hired by the thief, not by Khan." Liara explained.

"That phone call was pretty damning stuff, how'd you get it?" Shepard asked.

Her question was answered by a slew of daring feats listed by Liara who then promptly smirked when questioned further. "No, but the truth is boring."

"Khan didn't sound friendly to whoever that voice was. Maybe he'd pass on that info to us," Shepard mused, leaning on the table.

"That would take some extremely smooth talking," Liara said with a shake of her head. "If he sees you, he'll probably assume you're looking for revenge. The casino has a panic room. Chances are, he'll have gone to ground there. EDI can give us programs to hack the door, but the cameras and guards complicate things."

Brooks was nodding frantically. "Yeah, Khan could disappear. Or worse, if his guards ever open fire, normal people could get hit, like I did."

"She's right," Shepard agreed, unwilling to risk civilians. "We can't risk spooking him. We go in quiet. Small team, no gun play."

Glyph piped up. "Dr. T'Soni. This evening, the casino will be hosting a charity event to assist war refugees."

With an exchange of glances between Shepard and Liara, the Asari nodded. "Purchase some tickets, Glyph. Then call up a layout of the building."

Glyph winked out and his spinning body was replaced by a blueprint of the casino. "Score," Joker said, punching one palm with his opposite fist. "So how close can you get? You don't usually put a backdoor in a panic room."

EDI fiddled with the blueprint and highlighted a shaft. "This air shaft bypasses the security gate and ends up in storage. From there, the panic room's door camera can be disabled."

"Still," Kaidan added. "We're talking about a casino. There's got to be alarms in that shaft."

Liara nodded. "I believe I have some countermeasures that may help. I'll know more once we're inside."

"Who will go in the shaft?" Javik asked, his gruff voice a surprise among the planning. He was a Prothean of few words usually. "They will need to be small in size."

"Yeah that's not me," Wrex grunted with a chuckle. "Too many snacks of roast Varren leg."

Everyone's heads swiveled to Tali and she began to fidget. "I suspect my suit's built in tech would be picked up by security sensors."

When they all realized she was probably correct, they all turned to EDI. " _My_ presence in the casino would arouse suspicion. Mechs are not allowed since they can have cheating software."

Shepard sighed just before Brooks spoke up. "What you need is somebody trained in zero emissions tech. No electronics, no metal, just undetectable polymers... We had a course back in Opt-in, disabling a bomb with these little tweezers... see, the bomb was filled with shaving cream..."

Before she got wrapped up in another long winded ramble, Shepard cut in. "All right... you're in."

Brooks looked shocked, her already large eyes bugging out. "What? No... What?"

"You said it yourself. We've all got too much tech," Shepard reminded her.

"But... I managed to get shot just coming to talk to you. Now I'm supposed to hack my way into a safe room?" Brooks sputtered.

"We'll be backing you up," Shepard insisted. "The second you hit something you can't handle, we'll cover you."

Liara gave Brooks no chance to back out, "If that's settled, it looks like there's one last hurdle to get us inside."

"Which is?" Shepard asked with a raised eyebrow.

Liara glanced down at Shepard's current ensemble and cleared her throat. "Black tie required."

* * *

 

Shepard felt ridiculous as she smoothed out the skirt of her dress. She'd gone on a last minute dress hunt and a flustered Asari helped Liara pick out the 'perfect' dress. Every time she took a step, she felt like she was flashing the whole room. The slit on the side of the skirt reached up so high that she had needed to get a new set of underwear so her usual boy shorts didn't show. Liara had insisted on making the dress blue, which was the only thing Shepard wasn't complaining about. The top was cut low, her injured shoulder covered completely by a full length sleeve that had a hoop which wrapped around her middle finger to keep the sleeve down. The other arm was completely bare, the neckline dipping down around her breast and leaving her back uncovered. She'd insisted on being taped in to avoid any potential oops situations with the scant coverage. She felt naked without her pistol, but she imagined she might be able to do some damage with the heels of her shoes if it came down to a fight. She prayed it didn't come to a fight.

Garrus and Brooks were waiting for her outside the casino when her cab dropped her off. She carefully swung both legs out together and with a half bow, Garrus' eyes roved her as he helped her to stand. "Looking good Shepard," he purred, hooking her elbow with his and leading her down the path into the casino. He was not looking too bad himself. He had ditched his armor and was clad in a black and white version of his usual civvies. The dark color bringing out the shine in his skin as they passed under a slew of neon lights.

"I did the best I could without a carapace or a crest," she mumbled, playing the part and waving as they passed the onlookers not important enough to get tickets to attend the party.

"Your best has my mandible on the floor... Damn!" He said, lowly so Brooks couldn't hear.

The woman in question leaned in to whisper to her. "You know... I shaved my legs for this." Brooks was wearing a short dress in a lighter blue than hers it was simple at the top, a typical tank top shape holding her in much more efficiently than Shepard's dress. She _would_ be crawling through a duct, so the simple dress was a good idea. "I even put concealer over where I got shot."

"Just smile and wave, Brooks," Shepard said with a friendly nudge to the girl's arm.

Brooks left them when they got inside and Shepard and Garrus climbed the entry stairs to the main casino floor. "Liara, got any input?"

"I'm here, Shepard. EDI and I will keep in contact in case we're needed. Khan had a lot of surveillance set up. I'd mingle with the guests if you want to look normal."

"Okay, Garrus... time to meet the riffraff..." she said with a smirk.

The two of them wandered the casino, greeting people they knew and ordered a few drinks. After a few minutes, Brooks hissed over her comm. "I'm upstairs by the grate into the shaft, but there's a problem. Can you meet me?" Shepard found a set of spiraling stairs that led to the upper floor of the casino. Brooks was standing with her arms crossed in front of a large grate in the wall attempting to look casual. Shepard approached her and she perked up. "Okay, right, just like we thought... There's an alarm on the grate."

"We'll have to bypass it," Shepard said, her eyes narrowing as she looked at the grating.

"Dr. T'Soni gave me this to pass to you," Brooks handed Shepard a seemingly innocuous case that one would usually carry contacts in. "It's a resonance emitter lens," she explained as Shepard opened it up and saw the electronically wired lenses inside. "It should let you see security grids and wiring." Shepard inserted the lenses into her eyes, blinking to center them and the world lit up around her.

"Good," she said, already spotting the snaking wire that led from a small box inside the grate. "I'll follow the line to a junction box, splice it and disable the alarm."

"Yeah," Brooks agreed, sounding skeptical. "Fingers crossed."

Shepard put her engineering skills to the test and with a little help from EDI and a program to trick the cameras, she successfully disabled the alarm on the grate and Brooks was in. She and Garrus both wandered away to look casual and continue mingling while Brooks made her way through the ducts. They were forced more than a few times to do some more splicing on the casino floor. Shepard sweating while Garrus ran interference with the guards. Brooks nearly got caught once when she tripped a silent alarm, and Shepard had to way lay the guard heading her way while EDI got into their systems and posed as the boss to get him off the scent. It was a nerve wracking hour and Shepard was glad to be winning a few credits at roulette when Brooks told her she was on the other side of the door and ready for them. There were two cameras, and two guards in their way. Shepard watched the guard closest to the door and tried to time his watchfulness. She leaned casually against the wall beside the camera's circuit board and wordlessly set Garrus on the other guard pacing the room. When she was certain she had a moment, she carefully spliced EDI's program into the camera and quickly crossed the room to take out the second camera. When she completed it, she grunted into her comm to be sure Garrus dropped his guard and then slipped into the hallway to the junction box to open the doorway into the panic room. She worked frantically, silently cursing the limited time that she had on the camera program. Garrus stepped up beside her and pretended they were a normal couple hiding in an innocuous corner in case anyone should look that way. His proximity calmed her nerves and she managed to trip the door's security and get it open. They rushed in the door where Brooks stood and then it was easy enough with no one watching to get into the panic room.

The room was dark save for a roaring fireplace in the back of the room behind a very large ornate desk. Khan was sitting in his desk chair, facing the fireplace and gave no reaction to their presence. She glanced around, the lenses still in her eyes and searched for any booby traps that may allow him to convey such confidence. Seeing nothing, she said, "Khan, I'm not here to threaten you. We need to talk."

No response. She and Garrus exchanged a glance and he moved around the desk carefully and spun the chair. Khan's head fell forward with the movement. "What the hell?" Brooks said in surprise.

Shepard sighed while Brooks moved behind the desk to check Khan's computer. "And here I had this bad cop routine all planned," Garrus quipped as she worked.

"Commander, there's a deletion order on the terminal," Brooks announced as the computer pinged back a negative response.

"Damn it!" Shepard cursed elbowing Brooks out of her way so she could test a few hacks that she had up her sleeve.

"Everything's been wiped. I don't know if it was him, or the killer, or.... When I tripped that alarm, did I screw this up?" Brooks rambled over her shoulder with a gasp. Then she said after a short pause. "What are you looking for?"

"Mistakes," Shepard said with a short glance over her shoulder as her fingers continued to work. The terminal finally pinged a positive and she grinned. "Thought so. Whoever it was had to do this fast. They wiped the terminal, but not the comm."

"Ohhh, so we can take the comm back to the safe house to scan it or..." Brooks began while Shepard worked.

She traced back the last number contacted and above the fireplace behind her, a modded image appeared on the screen. "Elijah, come crawling back?" Shepard crossed her arms and tried to identify the speaker from the severely distorted image while the speaker realized they were not speaking to Khan.

"Guess again," she taunted.

"You... I see you've recovered from flopping on the floor like a fish," there was a slight chuckle in the modded voice.

"You'll have to do better than that," Shepard threatened. "The last guy that trash talked me was a few kilometers taller than you."

"Brave. I thought as much, but it won't matter. You have nothing. All you can do is wait for the hammer to fall," the mysterious person growled.

Shepard snorted. "Bring a bigger hammer. Your last try was inadequate."

The figure paused, probably gathering himself after the insult. "I'm going to take everything you have and everything you are."

The signal cut out and Brooks cursed. "Dammit. Sorry, Commander. There wasn't enough time to trace the call."

Shepard felt like punching something. And since Khan's corpse was the only thing nearby, she balled her fists and stalked away. "We're not finished. Pull out the data drives."

"The ones that got wiped?" Brooks asked skeptically. "You think we can find something?"

"With EDI, anything's possible. The sooner we get them to her, the sooner we can track down this threat."

* * *

 

Back at the apartment, Shepard had set EDI on the task of recovering whatever she could from the wiped drive while she changed and took a round against the punching bag. Garrus found her, still wearing his formal wear. He grinned at her around the bag as he grabbed it to steady it for her. "To borrow a phrase from Vega, 'You looked smokin' in that dress', Shepard. You got lots of looks." She paused her punching to regard him with a raised brow. "So did I, though, the ones directed at me said, 'how did a Turian like that get a girl like her?'... Hell if I know."

She smirked at his usual 'I'm not good enough for you' attitude. They'd had the conversation so many times now, she was sure that her responses were officially scripted in history. She dropped her arms and sighed. Before she could respond, Brooks' voice sounded over the apartment speakers. "Commander, EDI and I have been analyzing those drives. I think we found something if you're ready."

Shepard gave Garrus a thankful smile and patted his unscarred mandible and rubbed a thumb over his cheek before turning away to join Brooks and EDI around the dining table that had turned into information central. He quickly grabbed her to spin her to face him again and planted a kiss on her lips. "That is warm up for later," he rumbled with his body pressed against her as her heart began to pound.

She panted out a few breaths to regain control of herself and shoved him playfully away. "You are in so much trouble for that."

"I'm looking forward to my punishment," he continued to tease and she forced herself to walk away, followed by the enticing sound of his laughter.

Around the table, the crew gathered to hear what they had come up with. "Let's hear it," Shepard said once everyone was there.

EDI started the ball rolling. "Though the data's root structure was erased, the logic integrity remains viable."

"EDI has an incredible talent for this stuff. I know she's an AI, but even still..." Brooks announced as she pulled up some readings to display them on the holo-projector. "We found an encrypted communication from a few days ago. Just need another minute to crack it."

"A whole minute?" Joker said with teasing shock in his voice. "EDI here could shave that down to five seconds."

With a small smile EDI said, "I thought it best to allow Staff Analyst Brooks a chance to improve her decryption skills."

" _And_ now you've lost your chance to show off," Joker continued.

"Like she needs it," Brooks said crossing her arms with a soft chuckle. "You're the crew of the Normandy. You're legends to the rest of the Alliance."

"Legends can be good or bad... Which are we?" Shepard asked skeptically.

"You're the kind that people look up to. The kind they owe their lives to," Brooks explained with awe.

Wrex beat Shepard to the punch with his next words. "Then how come everyone's always shooting at us?"

"I think it's mostly you, Wrex," Tali teased. "The bigger the target, the bigger the, uh... target."

"You're saying I've gained weight?" Wrex asked with a nervous tone she never thought she'd hear from the Krogan.

"It just means there's more of the legend to love," Liara said softly, drawing titters around the table as Wrex's top lip curled up and he growled softly.

Brooks held out her hand to pass over each of them. "And the camaraderie, the friendship...? I think that's your secret weapon."

"It's all just part of the job," Shepard said with a shrug.

"Wait," Garrus interrupted. "'Job?' You mean the rest of you are getting paid for this?"

Before anyone could tease him about the form of his payment, though Shepard saw it on the tips of at least three tongues including her own, the holo pinged Brooks' results. "Here we go," Brooks said. "Wow... Those mercs who were after you? They bought a lot of weapons... Like, big ones..." She called up the listings and Kaidan frowned and stepped forward for a better look.

The image of an Atlas appeared. "Mechs?" he asked with surprise. "What do they need with that kind of firepower?"

Glyph suddenly hovered into their midst and blinked a furious red. "It appears this drone is preparing to rebel," Javik stated calmly, his hand twitching to his sidearm.

"I have just monitored the Commander's SPECTRE access code in use at the Citadel Archives," Glyph announced.

"Punch it up," Shepard barked as Javik visibly relaxed.

Brooks gasped. "The Archives are going into emergency lock-down. Whoever's hacking your records is there right now!"

"What do we know about the place?" Shepard asked, her adrenaline pumping. This might be their chance.

"Council keeps sensitive historical information there," Garrus said. "Real hush-hush. Even my old C-Sec clearance never got me in."

"Then we'll find our own way in," Shepard said, turning to get to her dresser and access her things. "Gear up and let's...." She was stopped dead in her tracks by a Volus standing in the middle of her kitchen holding a box. She cocked her head as the Volus stared at her, his suit hissing in time with his breathing. "What's with the Volus?" she asked turning to her crew.

James stepped forward with a sheepish grin. "Oh, pizza delivery guy. I got the munchies."

Shepard looked back at the Volus who held up the box and said with a hiss, "Double pepperoni."

Shepard sighed and Brooks brought her back to the situation at hand. "These archives are huge. You'll have a lot of ground to cover. Shame you can't bring everyone."

Shepard's lip cocked upwards in a lopsided grin. "Who says we can't? All hands on deck for this one."

"Hell yeah," James agreed excitedly. "But, uh, who gets to take point with you?"

Wrex, Javik and Tali all cleared their throats expectantly, hoping to be part of the action. As she glanced between the three of them, another cleared throat behind her drew her attention back to the Volus. "Who's going to pay the bill?"

* * *

 

About an hour later, they were all crammed into three skycars as they zipped through the wards. Shepard had split her people into three teams. Her point team was Garrus and Kaidan, as usual. Team Mako consisted of Brooks, Wrex, Liara, and Tali. She trusted her oldest friends to keep Brooks safe as they moved through the Archives. Team Hammerhead was filled by EDI, Javik, James and Cortez, who'd been more than happy to be a part of the action. Shepard opened her comms and asked. "What's the best way into the Archives?"

Cortez deftly piloted their car, following Brooks' car. Brooks excitedly answered, "The facility is located below the wards. Maybe a direct breach for maximum surprise?"

Shepard smiled. "I like it. Sounds like you're learning the ropes."

"Hell, hang out with us long enough, you'll learn ropes, knives, bombs, thresher maws..." Steve quipped and Shepard playfully nudged his arm as Kaidan cleared his throat and Garrus chuckled.

"Don't hang out too long," Wrex warned in a deep boom over the comm. "pretty soon you'll be making friends with Asari."

"I heard that," Liara said with a soft chuckle.

They all landed after James landed Brooks' car and stepped out of their cars to gather around Brooks. "The archives are somewhere below us. It cold be pretty tricky to get in there."

James grinned widely and held up a jury rigged explosive that he must have cooked up before they left. "Not really."

He set the bomb right down over a concealed entrance that EDI picked up with her sensors. The explosion ripped up the concrete and they lifted the rest away to reveal a scorched metal hatch. As soon as it was opened, Wrex dropped in and shouted, "Krogan first! See you at the party princesses."

Shepard held her team back and directed the other two toward the catwalks to either side of the room while they dropped down from above to stand on the main floor. The entry was much like any office. There were cubicles set up efficiently around the room and above it all hung a large Citadel shaped chandelier that lit the room up pretty brightly. Shepard stepped up to stand between the first two cubicles and get a better look around. Almost as soon as she stepped into sight, her chest lit up with three laser sights. With a groan she complained. "Not this again!"

Diving out of the way, she took cover behind a cubicle before the snipers could take their shots. She heard the others engaging in combat above and she cursed. They'd walked right into an ambush. "Ambush!" Garrus shouted.

"Scatter and take cover!" Shepard ordered as she offloaded a few shots from her pistol in the general direction of the cloaked snipers.

"You know in the old days we had at least five minutes before a mission went south!" Wrex complained from up on the catwalks.

As they fought, Shepard worried for her rookie. "Brooks, you okay?"

"Upstairs!" the woman responded, her voice scared. "Scattering and taking cover."

Shepard heard Wrex laughing triumphantly and wondered how long it had been since he'd been in a real fight. "Where do you think you're going princess?" he growled. She had no line of sight on him, but she knew he would get his job done.

The fight seemed to be going well until a voice sounded over the gunfire and Shepard's blood turned cold as ice. "That's enough! Drop your weapons or this won't end well for her!"

Shepard risked a glance around her cover and standing on the catwalk on the opposite end of the room was their mystery guest with a struggling Brooks in her grip. "You bitch!" Brooks growled as she tried to pry the woman's arm from her neck.

At a glance, everyone she had brought with her had been surrounded. Garrus and Kaidan stood at her back, both tense and awaiting her orders as the mercs surrounded them. "All right," she called so her voice resonated across the whole room. She stepped forward to kneel and set her pistol and shotgun on the ground before raising her arms in submission. With a grunt, Garrus and Kaidan both followed her lead. Garrus' subharmonics were rumbling with rage as he bristled at something she couldn't see. She wanted to turn her head to see if he had any intel for her, but she didn't want to take her eyes from the threat. Brooks was shoved from the catwalk, landing on her side before standing and limping to stand by Shepard. "Whatever you think you're getting away with, there is nowhere you can run, nowhere you can hide where we can't find you."

"Hide?" the woman said with a shrug as Shepard squinted, trying to see who she was. The voice was eerily familiar, but Shepard couldn't put a finger on it. "Why?" The woman stepped forward and Shepard's heart dropped out of her chest onto the floor as she stared at a perfect mirror image. "I'm Commander Shepard. I never hide."

"Not exactly how I saw this playing out," Garrus commented dryly as he and Kaidan lowered their arms.

The other Shepard leapt from the catwalk and touched down in front of them in a perfect superhero landing like you'd see in a vid and Shepard had to press her lips together to keep from sucking her teeth at the over-dramatization. "Who _are_ you?" Shepard spat, finding it difficult to bury the venom in her voice.

"You weren't the only Shepard Cerberus brought back to life, but at least one of us will finally do something with it." The woman said, cocking her hips and crossing her arms. The image was disturbing.

"Where did you come from?" Shepard asked, her curiosity piqued.

"The same DNA as you," the woman purred. Shepard never knew her voice could sound so full of malice and sex at the same time.

"A clone," Garrus growled.

"Cerberus spared no expense resurrecting you... with me." The clone said with a nod. "I was created for spare parts in case you needed another arm... or a heart, or a lung."

"Where have you been this whole time?" she demanded.

The clone scoffed and waved her hand. "In a coma... until I woke up six months ago. While you were in a jail cell on Earth, I was learning to be human." Shepard resisted the urge to inform her that she hadn't learned very well. "Amazing what a person can do with enough neural implants."

"I don't care who you claim to be," Shepard spat. "The role of 'Commander Shepard' is already filled."

"By the wrong woman," the clone insisted. "It's time the understudy had her day."

"Did the Illusive Man send you?" Shepard asked, not able to put the idea past him. He would probably find it quite hilarious if she had to fight herself while this war was going on.

"No, he abandoned me when he had what he wanted... _You_..." the clone sneered.

"So what's your point in trying to kill us?" Kaidan snapped.

"Because I don't have her memories. I'd never fool my supposed friends." The clone turned away as if trying to hide the anger on her face, but it seeped through in her voice anyway. "The ones who abandoned their duty to join the cult of Shepard." She turned back around with a disgusted smile on her face. "Like you, Major Alenko. I would have picked the other one on Virmire. Ashley something?"

"You're just a pale imitation of the real thing," Kaidan growled angrily as the clone ripped into his survivor's guilt.

"I'm the real thing, perfected," the clone said, moving back to stand in front of Shepard again. "I'm you without the wear and tear, Shepard. The doubts, the failures... I'm the lone wolf you were always meant to be... without the emotional baggage holding me back." The clone sneered again, glancing around the room at all of Shepard's friends like they were Varren dung on the bottom of her shoes.

"No one will ever believe you're Shepard," Garrus growled.

"They will when I'm flying her ship," the clone smirked.

Shepard's heart skipped a beat. She whipped up her arm to activate her omnitool and called over her comms to the Normandy. "This is Shepard. Initiate Normandy lockdown! Transmitting command codes now!"

Shepard realized her mistake as the clone continued to smirk as she calmly also raised her arm and her omnitool glowed orange. "Good idea. Too bad the signal was blocked." She fiddled with her own interface and opened a new comm channel. "Traynor, this is Shepard. Prep the Normandy for emergency departure. We're leaving. I'm sending the command codes now."

"Acknowledged. We'll get underway," Traynor's voice said back.

Shepard's blood boiled. "Never thought I'd say it, but I'm looking forward to killing myself," she growled through gritted teeth.

"I guess ominous threats of violence run in our DNA, but mine is more than a threat." She turned and as she walked away she said, "Execute them. The cult of Shepard ends today."

The clone passed through a door and Shepard had seconds to think of a plan. Her pistol sat at her feet, and she glanced down at it then upwards toward her boxed in crew. The large chandelier caught her eye and she dropped to her knees and grabbed her pistol. Not bothering to stand, she aimed at the chandelier and shot along one of the arms until it fell to pieces. She shoved the merc in front of her into the line of fire and the commotion allowed everyone else to gather their wits and break free. "We still got everyone?" Shepard shouted as she took cover.

"We're on the balcony!" EDI called out from above.

"I'm okay, too!" Brooks called out proudly. Shepard had no idea where the woman had gotten to, but there wasn't time to worry about her.

"Where's everyone else?" Shepard shouted as she called her biotics and started her incinerate program.

"Other side!" Cortez informed her.

"These primitives will make good sport!" Javik said with glee at the chance to fight. She really should take him out more to stretch his legs. He had been frozen for 50,000 years. He deserved a little play.

"Terminating hostiles!" EDI reported as she usually did while they fought.

"If we go down, at least we go down together!" Liara said with intensity in her voice.

"One big happy ass kicking family!" James agreed with a whoop. "See that shot, Brooks? That's how legends do it!"

"If I wasn't covering my eyes, I'd be impressed," Brooks admitted as Shepard smiled at her people's enthusiasm.

She unleashed her incinerate on one of the cloaked snipers and then heard Wrex shout something strange. "All right, everyone. Uncle Urdnot is back in town and he brought the boom!"

She chuckled, "Is that a catchphrase or something, Wrex?"

"Thought I'd try it out, see what you think..." he said as she shotgunned a merc who had gotten too close to her cover spot.

"Try again," Tali criticized as Kaidan chuckled.

As the other Shepard's mercs complained to their lieutenant about her crew and how much better they were, she heard one shout, "But they have a Krogan. Why don't we have a Krogan?"

"Wouldn't want to be you, princesses!" Wrex said with a booming laugh.

"Shit, that's a Prothean over there!" another merc shouted.

"And that's a future corpse over there," Javik retorted.

"I think that Turian they've got is Archangel. How the hell are we going to kill him?"

"You're not!" Garrus said cooly as he headshotted the merc who had identified him.

"Then maybe the other Shepard should have stuck around to help," their lieutenant complained.

"We've got 'em psyched out!" James said happily. "Hey, pendejos. Our Shepard is better than yours!"

"Better looking too!" Garrus agreed loudly. She couldn't help chuckling as she unleashed a shockwave to try and identify where the rest of the mercs were hiding by knocking them out of cover. A bullet whizzed near her head and she saw it had come from the catwalk. "Watch your aim up there guys!" Garrus called.

Apparently Brooks had made her way back up to the catwalk because she nervously responded, "Too close? Sorry!"

After a few more minutes of picking off the stragglers, Garrus signaled. "All clear. Now, where'd the other you go?"

"She's pushing into the archives," Shepard announced having seen which direction the clone had gone. "Stay in your groups!" She Kaidan and Garrus met up in the middle of the room and she checked them both for injuries while Garrus fussed over her. "Team Mako, you're on point."

"Right," Brooks stuttered. "What's a Mako?"

"Something we could use right about now," Liara informed her with a sigh.

"Team Hammerhead, cover the flank," Shepard continued as she hacked open the door into the archives.

"Got it," Cortez responded. "And the Mako's got nothing on the Hammerhead."

The archives were indeed as large as Brooks had warned. As soon as they passed through the doors that opened into a large warehouse type room, her radar said they were like fleas hitching a ride on the back of a horse. Their presence barely registered. "Whoa, big place." Kaidan said with a whistle.

"I am curious as to what your... clone is looking for in here, Shepard." EDI purred as Shepard identified the large circles on the walls as pods docked by the machinery all over and chock full of artifacts and holo-recordings of important facts and historical data from all over the universe. There were leagues and leagues spanning as far as the eye could see and beyond. Shepard shook off her awe and pushed forward.

"At this point, anything's possible..."

"Such as discovering you have a clone?" Javik asked, his tone almost as teasing as EDI's had been.

"I don't wanna talk about it," Shepard said, the thought making her feel almost as slap happy as the medigel overdose on Eden Prime. She was the only person who could go on shore leave, only to be ambushed by her freaking clone.

"Right," Garrus said with an amused snort. "At least not 'til we've all had a stiff drink."

"How are we going to find anything in this place?" Kaidan said in a whisper that felt oddly comforting in the eerily quiet Archives that seemed to grow as they moved further in and the ambush sites grew more plentiful.

"Glyph," Shepard hissed, calling the drone to her side. Liara had brought it to collect secret data that might come in handy for a Shadow Broker, but Shepard saw it as an asset. The drone hummed up beside her and Garrus sighed as it made the same noise as Tali's combat drone.

"Yes, Commander?" it asked with a helpful tone.

"Track the target. Give me updates on it's location," she ordered.

"What is the nature of the target?" Glyph asked.

"She looks like me," Shepard sneered.

"Then I have found the target," Glyph announced as it continued to hover beside her.

She half sighed and half chuckled in exasperation. "No, Glyph. It's _another_ me, now get going."

"At once, Commander," the drone acknowledged and floated off quickly to find the clone.

They moved cautiously but only encountered resistance as they neared the far end of that particular room. A group of four mercs rose up on one of the pod transport lines and started shooting, barely giving them a chance to take cover. Shepard heard her clone shout over their comms, something about a vault. Once the mercs were dead, she moved to stand on the line and Tali lowered it down to another pod that was open. Shepard and her team got on the second pod and it shot off along a track after Tali set them up. They found a particularly old assault rifle that still didn't use Thermal clips. Shepard admired the gun as the pod carried them further into the archives.

"This gun was part of the first contact war, year 2157," Kaidan said in awe as he read the data packet beside the gun.

"First time my people met yours, Shepard. Naturally, bullets were involved," Garrus teased, as she ran her fingers over the weapon.

As soon as the pod they were traveling in came to a stop and the iridium casing fell, Glyph flew down to hover in front of her. "Commander. The other you is searching for something 200 meters ahead."

"Got it," Shepard said, accepting the report and Glyph flew off again.

"Fighting your own clone," Garrus prodded, most likely smelling her discomfort with the situation. "Pretty crazy, even by our standards."

"But useful," Javik chimed in over the comm. "If there is a task you don't wish to do, Commander, let them handle it."

"So, like a personal butler?" Brooks asked.

"I don't wanna talk about it," Shepard reiterated in a sing song voice.

"Right, so let your clone do it," Garrus teased, trying to lighten the mood.

As more mercs descended on them, she could hear the clone shouting threats over their comm. Cortez responded accordingly. "The other Shepard sounds like a real asshole!"

"I'd quit if she was my Commander," Brooks joked cracking out of her shell a bit.

They fought over a mess of tubes that held more of the 'vaults' like the one they had rode over in. "Team Mako moving ahead. We'll see you on the other side!" Liara called out, their team apparently meeting less resistance than Shepard's own team.

Shepard made it a point to catch up quickly, making Garrus grumble as she charged a group of mercs at the end of the tube they were walking on. She still wasn't fast enough. Over the comm, she heard Tali's distressed voice. "Shepard, they've got us pinned down. We could use some help."

She frantically checked her visor for a way to get to the pile of thermal hits on her radar. After spotting a set of stairs that would lead to the ground floor, she sprinted ahead, catching a glimpse of one of the snipers on the catwalk level with hers. She knelt and took out the threat before she and Garrus vaulted down to join team Mako, Kaidan not far behind. The mercs had them surrounded and she began tossing biotics as she shooed her people up a nearby ladder to get back onto the catwalks. She pushed Garrus and Kaidan ahead of her and shouted. "Go! I'll cover you."

While Garrus headed up the ladder, the last to climb it, they tried to shoot at him in his vulnerable state. "Now they're just fighting dirty," he grumbled as bullets pinged off the wall surrounding him.

Shepard took out as many as she could as they showed their faces. She'd rescued Mako, but now she was pinned down in their place. Her shield was beginning to complain at the abuse it was taking from the multiple bullets that were finding their way to her. "This is Shepard, we need...."

Before she could finish, All 10 of her people showed up, lined up along the catwalk and fired everything they had to decimate the mercs below. Shepard turned and scurried up the ladder as the mercs all fell dead around her. "And that's the moment when the universe ran out of ammunition," Garrus hummed as Kaidan gave her a hand up the ladder.

"The... other... 'me' can't be far." Shepard said, finding it harder and harder to acknowledge the waste of skin as her clone. "Keep up the pressure and we'll try to surround her. Let's move."

The three teams broke down again and each took a different route further into the Archives. The area Shepard and her team found themselves in was a series of interconnected holo-rooms that depicted different periods in history. The detail was fascinating and Shepard found herself walking slower as the images reenacted wars and peace treaties and even induction of different races into the council and the SPECTREs. Among the holo rooms, they came upon some more groups of mercs and Shepard mourned the loss of history as some of the rooms were damaged by the gunfire. She hoped they could be fixed. "This is almost unfair," Tali commented at one point after one of the mercs fell from above to splat at Shepard's feet. "Should we give them a chance?"

"Speak for yourself, please. I'm not even a field agent!" Brooks pleaded.

"Just follow Shepard's lead and let the rest of us do the heavy lifting," Liara quipped.

Garrus chuckled. "Touche, T'Soni!"

"You think all you comedians could start hitting something?" Shepard said with a self deprecating laugh at Liara's jab.

When the last merc died, Brooks said in relief. "I think we got them all... or I mean, the rest of you did..."

"Or the Krogan did," Wrex boomed.

"Hammerhead and Mako, keep pushing ahead," Shepard ordered.

"On it," Cortez agreed.

In the next area with more holo-rooms more mercs appeared. "I'm starting to think we picked the wrong Shepard," one of the mercs shouted as his people were mowed down by her people.

"Attention low life mercenary wannabes? Say 'please' and we'll accept your surrender," James called out with a chuckle.

"Say 'pretty please' and maybe Wrex will take a break," Tali added.

"Try it, and we'll see," Wrex growled, then laughed like it was never gonna happen.

"The Prothean, on the other hand, makes no such promises!" Javik muttered.

Even Glyph got in on the action as it attempted to plead with the enemy drones to cease hostile actions in exchange for a mutually beneficial exchange of data. When the last merc in the area was dead, it hovered over to her and excitedly reported it's findings. "Commander, I have cataloged 18 previously unknown historical events!"

"Where's the target Glyph?" Shepard asked, slightly annoyed.

"She is searching for a secret vault. She did not wish to be disturbed," Glyph explained.

"What?" Shepard was flabbergasted.

"I thought she was you..."

Shepard groaned and shooed the drone. "Go find her again..."

"Stupid machine..." Javik commented.

The following area was much like the first and Shepard spotted a problem as soon as they entered. Up on the catwalk above, giving team Mako a fight, was an Atlas. She cursed, knowing there was no way they could fight that thing alone on the narrow catwalk. Without a second thought, she aimed an overload at it and drew it's attention to her and her team on the ground. The mech stepped off the catwalk and fell onto their level, drawing a curse from Garrus as he, Shepard and Kaidan scattered to find cover. "Try to help out your friends and you wind up in a mech fight. You're welcome team Mako!" Garrus shouted sarcastically.

"Thanks guys, good luck!" Brooks said cheerily as she realized the mech was no longer firing at her.

Between Shepard and Garrus' tech and Kaidan's biotics, the Atlas didn't stand a chance. As the thing shuddered and sparked as it readied to blow, Garrus sighed in relief. "I will never get tired of watching those things explode. Although the fact that the mercs put money into owning one makes a _lot_ more sense now that we know who their leader is."

"Shut up, Vakarian," she snorted. "I told you after Leviathan, I don't want an atlas anymore."

"Commander," Glyph appeared at her side again. "A large contingent of soldiers calling themselves 'Razor Squad' is just ahead." She moved forward as Glyph continued it's report. "They wish to inflict bodily harm on you. Also, I discovered an Elcor mating totem in vault 347B. Fascinating." Shepard shook her head and chuckled as Glyph zipped away.

"Team Mako here!" Tali called. "Showing team Hammerhead how it's done."

"Hammerhead here!" James spoke for his team. "You guys are just copying us!"

Liara retorted. "Mako here. If we were, we wouldn't be hitting anything."

"This is team Prothean. I have a higher body count than all of you combined!"

"Heads up, looks like they're getting serious," Cortez said as what Shepard assumed was 'Razor Squad' joined the fray.

James chuckled. "Oh yeah, Esteban? So maybe start hitting something for a change."

"Biggest target I see around here is your mouth, Mr. Vega," Steve taunted back.

"I've fought Volus bankers tougher than this!" Wrex grumbled.

Glyph was in the process of lowering the morale of the enemies at Liara's command when it hummed and said, "Lieutenant Vega a Volus pizza delivery man is on the line, asking for payment."

"Tell him they burnt the pepperoni," James complained.

Gunfire blotted out most of the rest of the jokes and banter while they fought against the heavily armed and armored 'Razor Squad'. Shepard grabbed a hold of their shields with her biotics to make room for Garrus and Kaidan's bullets on her level while the others fought from above. When the last of them was lying in a pool of his own blood after being vaporized by Javik's plasma rifle, Shepard moved forward to a door that she had to hack through.

"Looks like we're clear," Cortez said.

"Looks like I saved everyone's ass again," Wrex bellowed a laugh.

"Hammerhead and Mako, keep pushing ahead," Shepard ordered. She was really ready to see this finished in spite of the ease in which her entire crew worked together.

"Right!" Brooks said loudly. "I might throw up a little bit now if that's okay with everyone..."

They passed through another area full of holo-rooms and research cubicles, and Shepard noticed a decrease in the amount of mercs that were coming at them. Her clone was running out of flunkies it seemed. Even as that made Shepard smile, it also gave her a ominous feeling as they moved ahead to the next location and she couldn't get a hold of team Hammerhead. "There's team Mako," Garrus pointed ahead as they crossed paths.

"We'll try to clear a path, Commander. Hammerhead's gone ahead," Brooks assured her.

After another slew of Mercs, Tali announced that they saw the clone and were going in. Shepard quickly hacked the doorway to the next level to get up there and help them. Once up the stairs, she got a distress call from Brooks. Something wasn't right. She said that she had been hit and the team went on ahead. No way her people left an injured rookie on her own. Shepard exchanged a glance with her team and they moved faster. In the final area, she saw a wide open room and across the way she saw Brooks under fire as she fled. Without a second thought, she rushed ahead to lend her help. As soon as Kaidan stepped into the center of the room as the last one there, an iridium seal shot up around them and the trap was sprung. "That can't be good," Garrus said.

Shepard touched the glowing barrier and it shocked her fingers, making her even angrier. "Brooks! The vault sealed us in!"

"Is there an override?" Kaidan asked, his weapon scanning the area as he turned round and round looking for a threat.

"I'm not seeing one," Garrus growled, moving to stand closer to Shepard.

"Cortez? Brooks? Do you read me?" Shepard called urgently over her comm, fear twisting her gut for the safety of her friends. "Is anyone on this frequency?"

"The short answer is no. They're not," the clone stepped out of the shadows, crossing her arms. Shepard growled and shot her pistol angrily toward the barrier, but her bullet simply ricocheted back and Garrus laid a restraining hand on her shoulder as the clone shook her head disappointedly. "The longer answer involves your friends trapped in iridium vaults and forgotten for... well, forever."

"Others know about this, about you... the Alliance will stop you," Shepard growled.

"What do you think, Staff Analyst Brooks? Will the Alliance stop us?" the clone asked as Brooks sashayed up behind her.

"I wouldn't know," Brooks said, her normal nervous tone replaced by a cool confident cadence as she rested an elbow casually on the clone's shoulder. "I don't actually work for them."

Shepard shrugged Garrus' hand from her shoulder and approached as closely to the edge of the vault as she could, nearly pressing her nose into it. "The minute... the second I get out of here, I'm going to take your head and mount it in the Normandy CIC!" Brooks and the clone glanced at one another, her threat falling on seemingly deaf ears. "Then I'm going to mount her head next to yours." she pointed at the clone. Another silent pause and Shepard's blood was boiling. "Then I'm going to take both your heads and space them out the airlock!"

"That's _very_ dramatic," Brooks said, her English accent thicker than Shepard remembered it. "And if someone like say, Commander Shepard made the threat, I'd be worried. But you're not Shepard. Not anymore."

"You had Miranda," the clone said. "I have her. Mine has more bite."

"It was fun while it lasted," Brooks pouted as if she felt sorry for Shepard.

The clone moved to a nearby console and Shepard glared, never feeling more helpless. "What are you doing?"

"Setting things right," the clone snapped. "Remember this?" The console displayed an audio recording that played back as the ceremony that made her the first human SPECTRE. "Except somewhere along the way you forgot about your entire species." The clone's eyes fell on Garrus and she sneered in disgust. "You've saved more alien lives than you have human."

"I don't care what species they are," Shepard spat. "Every life counts, but maybe a clone wouldn't understand that."

The clone chuckled. "You know the one thing they can't duplicate?" she held up her palm, facing Shepard. "Our hand print. Life gives it it's shape, not DNA... which is a problem." She walked back to the console and said, "Computer, update Council records. Subject, Shepard, human SPECTRE."

"Accessing record. Please input new data." the computer chimed pleasantly. After it scanned the clone's palm, it said, "Biometric identifier updated. Good day, Commander Shepard."

"Now, if you'll excuse me, the Normandy needs it's captain, so uh.... I should go," the clone said following Brooks out after a condescending glance behind her.

"Farewell, Commander. I guess this is where 'legends' go to die," Brooks purred over her shoulder.

Shepard pulled her head back, her lip curling at the turn of phrase from the clone before the vault started off on its track and jostled her balance. It slid out into the largest room she'd seen yet. Larger even than the first room they'd walked in on that she hadn't been able to see the end of. It slipped neatly into an empty vault slot, throwing them into darkness. "So, that went rather well," Garrus sighed, his visor the only indicator of where he was standing.

Shepard couldn't take her mind off the phrase that the clone had said. It bothered her to hear it and she wasn't sure why. "She said 'I should go.' Do I sound like that?"

Garrus chuckled and patted her shoulder. "Yeah, kinda."

"And now, maybe let's turn our attention to the impregnable vault that we've just been sealed inside forever," Kaidan suggested.

Shepard held up a hand that he probably couldn't see. "How come nobody ever told me this before? I'm open to feedback here..."

"I'm not really one to talk. I've been told that I say 'calibrating' more than a Turian should," Garrus admitted.

"I'm gonna guess we've got an hour of air in here, tops," Kaidan continued as if she hadn't interrupted.

Shepard ignored him again, turning to Garrus. "Maybe it's 'I should _go_ '... 'I _should_ go'... ' _I_ should go'..."

Kaidan tapped her shoulder. "Shepard, hey! Why aren't you more worried about this?"

"Hm?" she asked, turning to face him. She could barely make out the shine to his eyes reflecting her visor then she shrugged. "Oh... Glyph, you still out there?"

After a tense moment, she heard the humming voice of the drone. "Yes, Commander."

"Unlock this damned thing and go find the others. Nobody steals my ship. Not even me..." She said as Kaidan sighed and Garrus chuckled, patting her shoulder.

* * *

 

They climbed out of the original hole that James had blasted in the roof. Joker was waiting for them in a single skycar. "I've got room for Shepard plus two. And figure it out fast because the other Shepard is stealing my ship!"

Shepard spun and pointed out Garrus and Kaidan then they hopped in the skycar. Several of her companions grunted in disapproval. "What?" she asked before Joker took off.

Wrex looked down and shuffled his feet. "I wanted to go."

"As did I," EDI sighed, "It seems I rarely get picked."

"Joker will come back for you I promise," Shepard called as the doors closed over them.

Joker piloted them toward the Normandy docks and cursed as they went. "This is why I hate shore leave! I swear you park the ship for five minutes..."

"Can you contact Citadel flight control and get them to deny the departure request?" Shepard asked.

"Tried," Joker growled in frustration. "All the comm lines in the area are jammed, probably to make it easier for them to steal my ship!"

"We'll stop them," Shepard said with confidence.

"Even if they get the Normandy, we can go to the council and prove you're the real Shepard," Kaidan said, his hand snaking around her seat to rest on her shoulder.

Garrus sighed. "No, she hacked the biometric logs. Any scan we try will show _her_ as the real Shepard."

"Yes, that!" Joker raged. "Can we all just agree that it'd be easier to _not_ let Shepard's evil clone steal the Normandy?"

"One way or another, we're taking this bitch down," Shepard agreed, her fists clenching as her hands rested in her lap.

"Damn right!" Joker egged her on. "You go kill the crap out of... you."

"Don't worry, you'll get your ship back," she assured him.

"We'd better. I just got the seat broken in how I like it," he whined. "And whatever you do, hurry. If the Normandy gets to FTL, we may never see her again."

"That's not gonna happen."

"Okay, Citadel systems are targeting the car any closer and they open fire," Joker said setting them down across the docking bay.

"Get back and pick up the others ASAP," Shepard ordered as her feet hit the ground and she pulled her pistol, expecting light resistance as the clone probably thought they were still locked up.

She happened to be right. There were a few guards stationed, but since communications were down, they were unable to call for backup and Shepard and her team easily dispatched them. Halfway to the Normandy, the engines gunned and Shepard felt a shock of fear. "We'd better hurry, they're making preparations for takeoff." Kaidan said as he took out a heavily armed merc with a perfect reave, the color returning to his cheeks as he absorbed their life force and replenished his amp power.

"Whenever we wanna go somewhere, there is always a half hour of preflight checks... They just gun the engine and go?" Shepard complained dropping down to the final approach and shooting through the omni shield of a merc in her way.

"Maybe we should skip the preflight ourselves next time," Garrus chuckled with a shrug.

"I'm strongly considering it," she agreed before mounting the stairs into the Normandy airlock.

"Probably wanna hurry," Kaidan pushed.

"I didn't come this far just to watch the Normandy leave," she snapped.

Once inside, they ran into a rather flabbergasted Traynor who upon seeing her sputtered. "And I don't even... Wait, what!? You were just on the Normandy. You... you fired me! Dishonorable discharge for conduct unbecoming! You kicked me off the ship with barely enough time to grab my toothbrush." She held up the 6000 credit monstrosity and Shepard sighed at her accusation.

"That's a Cision Pro Mark 4. It uses mass effect fields to break up plaque and massage the gums..." She recited from memory of their earlier conversation.

"Yes... I told you that..." Traynor said with exasperation.

"And I remember because I'm the real Shepard." Garrus and Kaidan had moved ahead to the airlock door that would get them inside the Normandy.

" _Someone_ just threw me off the ship... If it wasn't you...." Traynor frowned, her eyes roving up and down Shepard as if she were trying to make sense of everything.

"It was a clone... Sort of a long story," Garrus sighed as he used his omnitool to get them into the sealed airlock.

Shepard passed Traynor and moved ahead to step foot onto the inside of the Normandy airlock, feeling slightly more secure. "I can explain more later. For now..." She stepped up to the inner door and cursed as it twice threw back a negative response to her hacking. "Ugh. It's sealed."

"The engines are online. They're about to take off," Garrus urged, trying to add his omnitool to hers. It was no use, the thing wasn't budging.

"Is there anyone still on board who can help us?" Shepard asked Traynor.

"No, I was only there because I helped with the Normandy Retrofits back on Earth. Everyone else is on shore leave," Traynor responded with a panicked deer in the headlights look in her eyes.

"Okay. You know this ship inside and out. Can you get me inside?" She asked calmly so she didn't spook the poor girl.

Traynor jumped excitedly and pushed past Shepard, shooing Kaidan from where he was standing. "There's an emergency exit hatch for evacuations. It should be right..." she dug her fingers into the cracks between one floor plate and the other and popped up the floor to show a hatch. "here..."

Shepard knelt and scanned the hatch with her omnitool, cursing again, "Manual lock and it's only meant to be opened from the other side. Any ideas?" She glanced up at Garrus and he shrugged.

"From this side, a very precise mass effect field maybe?"

Shepard frowned and looked at Kaidan who also shrugged. Traynor stepped forward, determination on her face as she pressed a button on her toothbrush and the tiny mass effect field activated, glowing a light blue in the dim lighting. "That'll work," Shepard smirked taking the toothbrush from Traynor and sparking the fields over the lock. The hatch sprung open and they dropped down into a maintenance shaft below the bridge. "You know," Shepard grunted as she crawled through the tiny shaft, "If you'd told me this morning that a toothbrush was going to save the Normandy, I would have been very skeptical."

Garrus chuckled softly, then growled as his fringe brushed the ceiling. "Tight fit," Kaidan grumbled from behind Garrus.

She felt the ship leave dock beneath her, the inertial dampeners humming as they kicked on. They passed into a slightly wider, yet no taller section of the shaft and Shepard could see they were directly under the CIC. "Pretty sure we broke Traynor's toothbrush getting the hatch open. Remind me to reimburse her for that," Shepard whispered as a merc's boots clomped over her head on the metal grating of the floor.

"I'll make a note of it," Garrus hummed in amusement and she put a finger over her lips and pointed upwards with a mischievous grin on her face. "What do they size this place for, keepers?" Garrus continued and she turned away, shaking her head and awkwardly squat walked toward the only exit she could see.

"Quiet, can't risk them hearing us up top," she hissed, her tone playful.

"Sorry," he sighed from behind her.

Shepard paused under the floor and listened to the mercs. "Hey, what'd she mean by 'slow her down'? We're allowed to kill Shepard if we have to right?" one asked nervously.

"She said, 'slow her down' because she thinks we're cannon fodder," another said angrily.

"Oh, well... shit," the first said.

Shepard chuckled softly as she hacked open the hatch that would spill them right into the middle of the CIC where a dozen mercs waited for them. The hatch flew open and she booked it up the three steps and ducked behind a crate that had been left lying around full of the mercs' spare equipment. She saw Garrus and Kaidan find their own cover and started in on the mercs as they panicked at their sudden appearance.

"One of my favorite places to fight," Garrus hummed with excitement.

"The CIC of a warship?" she asked skeptically.

"Right there... above the gardens and below the electronics shops," he chuckled.

She joined in his laughter, "And antique shops, as I recall..."

"But, only if they're classy!" he shouted as he sniped a merc in the far back of the room near the disabled security scanner.

Kaidan sighed as he painstakingly tried to concentrate on not hitting anything important as the firefight spread across the CIC. "I forgot how seriously you two take everything," he said sarcastically.

"If I don't laugh, I might cry," she grumbled as she tried to not let the theft of her ship get the best of her. They took down the mercs all around and then she moved toward the elevator. As she passed the Galaxy map, she spoke to the ship. "EDI, this is the real Shepard. I need you to lock down the Normandy. Can you help us out?" There was no response. "EDI? Do you copy?" Still nothing.

"They must have shut her down," Kaidan pointed out.

"Let's get to the cargo bay," Shepard sighed stopping in front of the elevator, knowing the clone had probably gone down there to raid the armory. There was a dumpster beside the elevator and Shepard stopped mid stride as her blood boiled. Right on top was a very angry Ferguson, his cage on it's side with a note attached. "'Please send this to an animal shelter for proper disposal as a warship is not an appropriate...'" She crumbled the note in her fist. "Oh, that is _not_ okay!" She glanced at Garrus and gritted her teeth. "She messed with my hamster, guys. Now it's personal." Garrus and Kaidan simply stared at her. "Guys? Were you gonna say something or... No, no I get it. Hard to even find the words... Should we check on my fish, cuz if she's getting rid of all the pets..." When Garrus crossed his arms and Kaidan rubbed his forehead as if she were giving him a migraine she sighed. "We should probably deal with her first, huh?" With a sympathetic pat from Garrus coupled with a purring in his chest to comfort her, she righted Ferguson's cage and promised him lots of treats when this was over. "All right, sit tight little guy. Anybody gives you trouble, go for the eyes."

They piled onto the elevator and she slammed the button for the shuttle bay. As the elevator crept down, much slower than she remembered the SR2 elevator, Garrus chuckled. "So, anyone wanna talk about their people's history?"

"No..." Kaidan grumped as Shepard chuckled as she remembered back to their first year together on the SR1 and all the time on the Citadel and in the ship's elevators when they had to kill time while the machines chugged slowly up and down.

"Nothing? Oh, come on, I can't be the only one who misses those times we used to chat in the elevators back on the Citadel..." Garrus continued to taunt, making the elevator ride feel faster. "So disappointed..." he sighed.

She shot him a grateful glance as the elevator came to a stop. They stepped cautiously out of the elevator and each picked a direction. Shepard went forward, Garrus to her right and Kaidan the left. She paused when movement caught her eye and her jaw nearly hit the floor. Her clone stepped out from behind James' cubby hole and presented herself with a satisfied sneer on her face. She was dressed in a set of Shepard's default N7 armor before she modded with upgrades and her now signature blue across the chest. Shepard pulled her head back, her lips curling. "Well, that's creepy."

The clone looked put out then raised her shotgun and took a few shots at Shepard before taking cover. Shepard dodged the shots and knelt behind the weapons upgrade terminal. "You wanna stop shooting up my ship?" the clone snarled as Shepard fired blind over the cover.

"It's not _your_ ship," Shepard argued as she looked up to see that the clone had moved, but she wasn't sure where to.

"It will be. I've taken your name, your SPECTRE rank, even your fingerprints!"

Garrus moved up to crouch beside her and nodded forward. He had seen where the clone went. Shepard nodded and moved around the cover to try and flank the bitch. As she moved, she taunted. "And then you left me to die... Only I didn't. You think fake fingerprints are going to fool the Council? Or Hackett?" She moved around the cover where Garrus had pointed out the clone, but she was gone. Shepard narrowed her eyes, listening. "How's that big plan looking now?"

No sooner were the words out of her mouth than she heard the tell tale click of armor slightly behind her to her left. She spun and released her omniblade, blocking the clone's attempt to stab her in the back with it's omniblade. They tousled for a moment before she pushed the clone off her and Brooks appeared with a shotgun of her own, calling for reinforcements and making Shepard duck for cover again. "Take her down!" the clone shouted.

"Not on my watch!" Garrus retorted. All hell broke loose in the shuttle bay. It was the three of them against Brooks, the clone and 'Hatchett Squad'. Shepard focused on her clone, allowing the others to watch her back as she charged her then backed off to charge some tech skills and disrupt her shields for a more effective warp field. The clone, unsurprisingly, knew all her tricks and fighting herself was becoming increasingly tricky as the clone blocked a lot of the incoming biotics. "Shepard, you need to stop fighting like you!" Garrus shouted as he noticed her struggling.

"You try not fighting like you," she grumped as she reloaded her shotgun. She knew he was right and it made her mad.

Suddenly, her comm hissed and she heard a voice. "Hey, Lola, you copy?"

"Lola here! You cut through the jamming?" she called in relief.

"We did," Liara's voice caressed over the comms. "It was heavily defended, but we got through and disabled their tech."

"You should have died at that damned sushi place!" Brooks snarled as the clone tried to charge her.

"Commander, the Normandy's preparing for a jump to FTL," Cortez informed her as they battled.

"Can you get to the cockpit, like soon?!" Joker shouted.

"Negative! I'm occupied in the shuttle bay." She pushed the clone away, quickly recharging her own shields and then lashing out with the butt of her shotgun and clipping the clone's chin. She stumbled backwards and then disappeared behind some cover.

"Roger that, Commander. We'll proceed with Plan B," Cortez said with a bit of glee in his voice.

"Plan B? The hell is Plan B?" Joker asked before she heard a 'whoa'.

" _I_ am Commander Shepard!" the clone growled from across the bay.

"Are you kidding me? You're nothing but one more mercenary thug!" Shepard seethed as the clone still refused to believe they were winning.

"You ruined everything! My plan was perfect!" Brooks shouted.

"Better luck next time!" Garrus retorted as he tossed an overload at her.

"My team is just as good as yours!" the clone said in defense of her slowly dying mercs.

"A team? You have minions... and you're running out!" Shepard taunted back.

"You should have stayed in the archives!" Brooks growled shaking off the sparks from her gun as it overheated. "I tried to make it clean and painless."

"Argh!" Joker muttered over the comm. "Again with the pancreas!"

"I'm overriding the skycar's safties, Commander. I'll obstruct Normandy's path. Try to get their attention," Cortez said in that same gleeful tone from before.

"We're bait? Plan B stands for bait!?" Joker complained.

Brooks called again for backup and only a few showed up. "Moving in, Commander," Cortez warned just as the Normandy shifted unexpectedly. Shepard was thrown around and off balance, dropping down to take cover while the swaying ceased.

"What the hell's going on up there? Get us out of the Nebula and jump to FTL!" the clone shouted over her own comms. Whatever answer she got made her growl angrily before shouting again. "Then shoot it!"

"You need to stay within 30 degrees of the nose to block course plotting," Joker warned as Cortez apparently dodged the Normandy's guns.

"That makes us a perfect target," Cortez explained calmly.

"No, that makes us the bait! You want me to drive?" Joker insisted.

"No..." Cortez argued back. Shepard couldn't help chuckling at the bickering between Cortez and Joker that made them sound like an old married couple.

"Dammit," Shepard was close enough to hear the clone's muted curse. "Launch the shuttle and blow that thing out of the sky!"

The cargo hatch opened and the jostling ship tipped further as the shuttle lifted from it's cradle and sped out the open hatch. It began firing on Cortez and Joker in their skycar, but she trusted Cortez to keep them safe. She pinpointed the clone's location and quietly charged her from behind. The clone's shields dropped and Shepard was able to get a shot off, clipping her armor near her elbow before she was forced to back off. "Watch out! That door's still open!" Garrus warned as they were thrown around inside the unsecured cargo bay.

Fighting got a bit more difficult as her footing became unsure. She and the clone met each other a few times in hand to hand, but for the most part, she was forced to stay at range, throwing biotics and tech to weaken her. "I can win this war!" the clone shouted. "All you have are the vain hopes of a tired old woman!"

"This tired old woman is kicking your ass!" She shouted back, insulted at the jab.

"You're just cybernetics! Scarred, worn out Cerberus tech!" The clone was trying to mess with her head. She had struggled with her identity for a long time after she'd been brought back, but knowing Garrus could tell she was really her made her feel like a person again. Like herself again and the angry words of a clone were not going to shake her now.

"You know where I got those scars?! Feros and Noveria and Virmire and Ilos! And the Collector base and Palaven and Tuchanka and Rannoch! I earned these scars protecting the galaxy! You got yours from a petri dish!"

"You're a figurehead. A decent soldier with a lucky streak!" the clone insisted.

"Then how come you wanna be me so badly?" Shepard taunted.

"You're all blind!" Brooks added. "You worship Shepard while the galaxy dies around us."

"Says the woman who made herself a clone..." Garrus quipped.

"This changes nothing. Once you're dead, we can explain everything!" Brooks mocked.

"The rest of my team has already put a message to Hackett by now! It's over, Brooks!" Shepard argued.

The clone had backed off and was showing signs of fatigue. "What's wrong with you? Do you want her to win?" Brooks grunted, shoving the clone back into the fray.

"Shut up and let me fight!" the clone sneered.

"You know, the real Shepard would have blown my head off by now," Garrus taunted, noticing the fatigue as much as she had.

"Let's not give the clone ideas, Big Guy!" Shepard called out, throwing him a small smile.

"Damn you all to hell," Brooks grumbled, trying to fire on Kaidan but missing when a cargo crate slammed into her and knocked her off her feet.

"Should have stuck with comedy, Brooks. You don't have what it takes for the front lines," Garrus said with a chuckle.

"I'm taking the Normandy back!" Shepard growled, moving to flank the clone. "And honestly, I'm doing you a favor, cause you don't have what it takes!"

"I'm Shepard! Do you hear me, bitch. I'm Shepard!"

Shepard jumped on the unsuspecting clone's back, knocking her to her knees. They tousled, the clone trying to throw a warp at Shepard that bounced off her freshly charged shields. Shepard rolled to her feet and took a swing at the clone. When she ducked the swing, Shepard tackled her. They rolled together toward the edge of the open hatch. Shepard stopped them just before they went over, putting herself over top of the clone. She straddled her, punching her in the face three times, and bloodying her nose. The clone got her leg up under Shepard and with a shout kicked her backwards. Shepard fell to her back and just as the clone stood up to attack her, the ship banked again, rolling Shepard to the edge, her legs dangling over. The clone fell and wound up a few feet away in a similar predicament.

"Look at you!" the clone said bitterly as they both struggled to keep their hold. "What makes _you_ so damned special?! Why you and not me!?"

"Hang on!" Garrus shouted as he and Kaidan ran to her.

"We've got you!" Kaidan dove down to grab hold of her, Garrus down on the floor, holding his ankle and using his other hand to keep them attached to the ship. Kaidan helped drag Shepard back onto solid ground where she knelt and Garrus moved beside her to lay a hand on her back as she caught her breath.

She chuckled, standing. "Thanks."

"What about her?" Garrus asked softly, once he was convinced she was unharmed.

Shepard glanced at the clone, her face so much like her own. The expression was sorrow, regret and resentment, mixed with a dash of disappointment as Brooks walked away, not even attempting to apologize for leaving her dangling over the edge of the hatch. Shepard knew rejection and how it felt. The hatred in her gut twisted to pity and she reached out her hand. "Here, take my hand."

The clone's gaze shifted to her, her eyes narrowing and her lip curling. "And then?"

"And then you live," Shepard sighed, her hand still outstretched.

"For what?" the clone spat before letting go of the edge and falling silently to the streets of the Citadel below. Shepard looked away, a single tear shed for the potential that had been wasted. Garrus hummed, but she wasn't certain if it was sympathy or fulfillment. She was glad to have it over, too, but letting herself commit suicide was an eye opening experience. It gave her a glimpse of what could have happened to her if she hadn't had her crew and friends to keep her on track.

Minutes later, Cortez had landed the skycar in the shuttle bay and was assessing the cargo bay as the hatch closed. "Fortunately they weren't here long enough to do much real damage," he explained as Shepard followed him, her arms folded over her stomach that still felt a bit nauseous. "Although I may need some help from James cleaning up the damage to the shuttle bay."

"Plus they over loaded the heat diffusion systems firing at us," Joker said with a chuckle. "Not sure if you noticed, but shuttle guy here did some crazy stunt flying to keep us in one piece."

Cortez paused and turned to regard Joker with surprise at the praise. "It's nice to fly something a little more maneuverable than the Kodiak," he said with a wink.

"What about EDI? Is she back online?" Shepard asked, turning to Joker.

"I am once again fully in control of the Normandy," EDI purred over the ship's speakers. There were electric sparking sounds in the background and Shepard was convinced that EDI was exacting revenge in the form of repair drones zapping the mercenary pilot still trapped on the bridge. It made her smile.

"Glad to hear it. What about the mercs? Any survivors?"

"Just one crappy ass pilot and _her_." Joker spat as Cortez paraded a handcuffed Brooks in front of them. "Alliance is taking her to a high security facility. Maybe she can give them some dirt on Cerberus."

Brooks looked up through her hair as it fell in her face. She cocked her hips and batted her eyelashes. "I'll be more than happy to cooperate with the authorities."

Shepard sighed, dropping her arms. "Maya, I know that voice."

"Do you, really?" Brooks asked with a smirk.

"You're getting a chance to redeem yourself. Don't waste it," Shepard begged, approaching the woman.

"So serious..." Brooks tsked. "Admit it. Some part of you liked having me around. Looking up to the legend." Shepard turned away, ready to ignore the taunting until Brooks spoke again. "We had some laughs. And who knows? Maybe we'll have more someday. You know you'll miss me."

"No," Shepard spun back around to look Brooks in the eye. "We won't. Because you're going to stay in your cell and do your time."

"Afraid I'll escape, come back for revenge? Is the great Commander Shepard pleading for her life?" Brooks taunted, with a chuckle beneath her voice.

Shepard used her superior height and her anger to place herself right in Brooks' personal bubble. She stared down the woman and through gritted teeth said, "I'm pleading for _yours_."

All of the bluster drained from Brooks and she sighed. "So thoughtful. Then I suppose I'm off to lockup." As Shepard turned away again and Cortez began to lead her off to the brig, she said one last thing that made Shepard feel surprisingly better. "You know, _she_ wouldn't have let me live."

"You can't clone everything," Shepard said softly as her mind started to wander toward the time it would take to repair the Normandy and the potential shore leave they would be having.

"I'm sorry we didn't shoot her," Garrus grumbled, lowering his pistol that Shepard hadn't even realized he'd had in his hands. She definitely needed a break.

As the Normandy pulled back into it's docking bay, Cortez reappeared at her side. "The rest of the squad's waiting outside, Commander. We'll have the Normandy back in shape in no time." He patted her shoulder.

"Appreciate it," she said with a smile as the hatch opened and they began to disembark.

"Shore leave, always an adventure," Kaidan mumbled as she walked down the ramp to join the rest of the crew that waited for them.

She chuckled and glanced back at Garrus who rumbled at her, his mandibles spreading slightly in a smile. "Come on," she said. "maybe we can take some _actual_ time off. No explosions or anything. Just us."

"I'll believe it when I see it," Garrus said. "But it's worth a shot."

 

She had hailed a cab back to her apartment and Joker was dropped off somewhere along the way after suggesting she throw a party later at her place. She liked the idea, but right then, she just wanted a long soak in her hot tub. Garrus had left her to head off somewhere after pulling her aside and leaving her breathless with a kiss, promising they would get together later. He had something up his sleeve, but she was too tired to wonder what it might be.

She stripped her armor in the elevator up to her floor and shuffled into the apartment and upstairs. The bath was heavenly and the scented oils she'd found squirreled away in the medicine cabinet nearly put her to sleep. After getting out and drying off, she was picking through her wardrobe in her towel and she heard the apartment VI chirping noisily. She padded downstairs in her towel and opened the email. It was from Garrus.

_Shepard,_

_When you have a free moment, I thought we'd check out the bar scene around here. Let's meet at the Silver Coast Casino, upper floor. Hopefully no dead arms dealers this time!_

She chuckled and closed out the terminal before going back up stairs and taking out the dress Liara had made her wear to the casino the last time. Garrus had liked it and she wanted to look nice, even if it was just to meet him for drinks.

* * *

 

The casino was packed and she found a seat at the bar upstairs, out of the way of the main crowd. While she waited, she tapped her freshly painted nails on the bar and watched a few of the patrons as they danced to the low volume club music. When he arrived, she smiled widely as he walked right past a female Turian who stopped dancing long enough to ogle him as he passed, his eyes only for her. He had the same idea she had, dressing in his black and white dress civvies that he had worn to the party. When he pulled up the bar stool beside her, his eyes roving up and down her, she smirked and said, "So, a Turian on shore leave. You come here often?"

His brow under his visor lifted in a question before he opened his mouth to show his understanding then asked. "Is this that, uh, first date thing we talked about?" At a nod from her after she stared down the female who was obviously contemplating approaching them, he stuttered shortly before getting into the swing of it. "Got it. Yes, yeah, Oh, I come here often. Good place to blow off steam. Scenery's not bad either," he cocked his head to look out over the dance floor, letting her know that the female had not gone completely unnoticed. "Though the view in front of me is even better."

She grinned and threw a faked accent into her voice. "That supposed to melt a girl's heart?"

"No, but this voice is..." he purred, leaning in close to her, the rumble of his chest mixing with the bass of the music and making her heart speed up. "I'm Garrus Vakarian, codename Archangel. All around Turian bad boy and dispenser of justice in an unjust galaxy." She blinked at him, trying to play it cool and he said. "Also, I kill Reapers on the side. And you are?"

"Commander Shepard, Alliance Navy," she managed, trying to swallow her raging hormones.

"Shepard, huh? I might've heard a few things about you," he continued.

She nodded, biting her bottom lip. "If they're naughty, they're right."

"Well, I'm looking forward to finding out," he inched closer to her.

The music in the room changed over to a sultry tango and his head cocked as she smirked. "Uh huh, and do most girls fall for that?" she asked, playing hard to get.

"Well, sure, you know this voice and uh... and... uh..." he leaned in closer and whispered. "I'm running out of banter here, Shepard."

She giggled softly, loving that even after all the time they'd been together, she could still fluster him. "Make it up... remember, we just met."

"Right," he leaned an elbow casually on the bar and slipped back into his deep rumbling purr. "I mean, yeah, all the girls fall for it. Let me show you." He stood up from his stool and took her hand in his to pull her up with him.

"Wh... What are you doing?" she asked in a panic. Everyone knew she was a terrible dancer and he was dragging her toward the dance floor.

"It'll be fun," he assured her, and with one final tug, she fell into his arms. He spun her around and her dress tangled slightly around her legs.

"Oh no," she protested, but he pulled her closer. "No, no, no, no... No!" He had her pinned to his body as he began to move.

"Been taking lessons on the side," he whispered in her ear as he guided her around the dance floor. She was nervous and stiff. The only reason she even knew a little bit of the Tango was because she had taken lessons as a child, but her instructor had kicked her from the class for having two left feet and always trying to lead.

"You're gonna pay for this later," she threatened.

He spun her around and out to the side and by some miracle she remembered to flourish her arm outwards before trying to escape, but he had a firm grip on her hand and pulled her back against him. "Promises, promises," he said in a low hum that set her nerves tingling.

Moments later, their feet connected as she found herself trying to lead. He smiled and calmly corrected her footing before resuming the dance and not skipping a beat. He spun her around once, right in front of him and this time she didn't try to escape. They moved fluidly as soon as she gave in and allowed him to lead her for once. She was so used to being Commander Shepard that taking the backseat was going to take some getting used to. He had eyes only for her as they moved around the dance floor and he turned them a quarter turn, their footing getting more complex as she moved with the music, the heels making it easier to twist on the balls of her feet. As they turned, she lifted her right leg to wrap around his thigh and heard the people around them react. She realized that most of the dance floor had cleared the way for them to dance Her leg was exposed, the slit up the dress leaving even less to the imagination than it had originally. As she grinned up at him, noticing him smirking at her bold statement, he stepped the leg back, taking hers with it and supporting her weight as she pressed her whole front to him. Their faces were inches apart. When their dance resumed, she started adding flourish to her steps. Apparently she could dance when she danced with him. She felt like a professional and she let out a happy chuckle.

He grinned widely. "Now you're getting it." Their awkward first steps had turned into a spectacle, as the whole bar watched. When he released her into a triple spin, she saw James standing at the edge of the dance floor, his arms crossed as he watched.

She grinned mischievously and spun into him, making him hum in appreciation as she teasingly pressed her body to his. "mm, mm, mm."

Her elbow was grabbed and Garrus pulled her back to him as the onlookers chuckled. The dance continued until the song came to a stop and she raised her other leg again to wrap around his opposite hip and he dipped her backwards, her weight nothing in his strong arms. She winked upside down at James before returning her attention to him as he grinned down at her. "So, tell me. Think a girl would fall for that?"

"Oh, hell yes. I see you've been putting that reach and flexibility to good use," she mumbled as he lifted her back to her feet, his hand still on the small of her back and her leg still around his.

"You know it. And it gets even better when you try it in bed," he whispered, his lips so near her that she felt his mandibles touch her neck as he spoke. Her shudder made him chuckle. "Although, that comes later. Now, I'm going to buy you a nice dinner and a few drinks."

"Glad to see I didn't get all gussied up for nothing." she grinned, finally dropping her leg, her dress falling back into place.

It was the first date they never had the chance to go on. He took her to a high end restaurant run by Asari called The Lavender Orchid. He ordered something he called Rouladen which looked like the dextro equivalent of a steak and she ordered a chicken alfredo dish. They talked and laughed, both of them doing their best to forget that a few sectors away there was a war on. Shepard was never one for wine so she ordered a beer with her food. The server lifted an eyebrow at her, but didn't question. Garrus chuckled and ordered a Drossix Blue.

The food was delicious and the beer was dark and heady, only a few making her a bit giggly. For once, they were allowed to enjoy each other's company without some emergency tearing them apart. He held her hand across the table and their chairs drifted around the small round table as they moved closer and closer. By the time he pulled out his credit chit to pay, she was practically in his lap. He hurried the waitress along, as she gripped his thigh under the tablecloth. They made a speedy exit and could hardly keep their hands off each other in the cab ride back to her apartment.

As he backed her down the hallway, she fumbled with the access code on her omnitool and finally managed to get the door open. They spilled inside, and she flipped the console that would lower the curtains so they didn't give the whole ward a peep show. His hand slid up the slit of her dress to find the stringy underwear beneath. "Oh, I like this," he purred as he snapped the string on her hip. She jumped back, startled, and he pulled her to him again to press his lips to hers. She worked on his clothes, which she had gotten much better with and he frowned at the tape holding her breasts in place. "Oh, come on, really?" he grumbled.

She chuckled, taking her hands from his shirt to peel away the dress and let it fall to the floor. "Better?" she asked as she stood nearly naked in front of him.

"Much," he purred before scooping her up and tossing her over his shoulder to carry her up to the master suite.

 


	36. Thessian Temple

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard regretfully witnesses the fall of the Asari homewold.

The vacation was much needed for everyone. She was able to spend some one on one time with each of her people during the two weeks that they were marooned on the Citadel. Liara stopped in and took a much needed break from being the Shadow Broker by teaching Shepard a song on the piano, Tali shared her favorite chick flick vid, James stopped by to show her his new tattoo (A large N7 logo in the middle of his back) and telling her that it meant he was going to accept after the war. She also painstakingly beat his pull up record of 182, which caused Garrus to have to massage out her muscles that night when she could barely lift her arms. Kaidan stopped in one evening and cooked her a steak dinner which she relentlessly teased him about, Jacob and Zaeed challenged her to an arcade game or two, Javik was asked to participate in a vid which turned into a fiasco in which they had to walk out on, Steve took her on a wild ride in the shuttle with the inertial dampeners turned off, Traynor invited her to lunch that they ended up taking a rain-check to when Traynor entered herself in a strategy game tournament. She and Jack battled it out in the combat simulator, she had to bail Grunt out of C-Sec's arms when he and his squad busted him out of the hospital and went on a drunken field trip around the Presidium, and she and EDI went shopping on Joker's dime. Shepard took a few days on her own to assist Aria in recapturing Omega from Cerberus which made Garrus grumpy for two days after, and she was even able to catch a conversation with Miranda who had deemed it safe enough to reappear on the Citadel after their last holo meeting. She made it a point to double warn the small woman about the assassin who had killed Thane, but Miranda assured her she always had a plan. 

The most relaxing part of her vacation was all of the time she was able to spend with Garrus. He took her to a few of his secret hang outs that he had discovered in his days at C-Sec. He had apparently spent a lot of time on crap assignments because of his insistence on doing things his way, much to the chagrin of his superiors and the patrols had afforded him a lot of spare time to explore the hidden charms of the Citadel. They also spent time in her apartment, watching vids and ordering in. It was a satisfying preview to what life could be like after the war.

The day before they were scheduled to depart, she got a message from the Asari Councilor, asking to see her. She met the woman in Udina's old office where they were still investigating his corruption. According to her, the Asari were beginning to feel the war on their homeworld, Thessia, and they were now willing to assist in the war efforts. She mentioned the Crucible and the component they were calling the Catalyst that was still missing. Although she didn't know where the Catalyst might be, there was a highly classified artifact on Thessia that she insisted might be able to help them identify it. She handed Shepard a data pad with a navpoint for the temple where the artifact was housed and informed her that a scientific team would assist her in recovering it.

* * *

 

Being back on the Normandy felt strange after all of the time away. She plopped Ferguson's cage back in it's usual place and greeted Nibbler who scowled at her. She relaxed into her desk chair and wiggled to get comfortable before closing her eyes to re-acclimatize herself with the sounds of the ship.

"Shepard." She was broken from her thoughts as Liara's voice poured over the speakers.

"Yes, Liara?" she asked with a smirk, knowing the Asari could not sit still for very long.

"I have something I'd like to show you. May I come up to your cabin?" she asked.

Shepard could picture her hands wringing with nerves. She smiled and said, "Of course. I'm not busy." A few minutes later, Liara buzzed her door and EDI helpfully let her in. "Come on in," Shepard offered, stopping at the top of her stairs to gesture her friend inside.

Liara held a small black box in her hands and she smiled softly, reminding Shepard of how she used to be when they first met. It was hard to believe it had only been 4 years ago. Liara had changed so much. "Thank you. Could we sit?" Shepard nodded and allowed Liara to pass her and set the box on the coffee table before following her down and sitting on the couch to see what she was doing as she knelt in front of the box and began pressing buttons. "I've been thinking about the knowledge we've gathered on the Reapers and how easily it could be lost again. So I put a plan in motion to preserve things for the future." A holo projector opened above the box, lighting her cabin with a wide cluster of stars that glittered beautifully in the dim lighting. Closer to the box, images cycled with information.

"What's this?" Shepard asked, awestruck by the prettiness of the tiny box.

Liara smiled at her. "It's a record of the galaxy. Information on the Reapers, relays, different cultures, and blueprints of the Crucible." Liara stood as the images cycled slowly. "But there's one entry I wanted your opinion on."

"Which one?" she asked, finding it hard to tear her eyes from the holo-images.

"Your own," Liara nearly whispered as she bent to touch a button and a small holo-image of Shepard herself appeared in place of the Crucible blueprints. "I'd be honored to have your input. How would you like history to remember you?"

Shepard was honored. She regarded her friend as the Asari began to wring her hands again. She sat forward and smiled warmly. "You know me well enough to fill in the blanks, Liara."

Liara looked taken aback as her own smile widened her lips. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah," she sat back and crossed her right ankle over her left knee and rested her palms flat on her stomach, relaxed. "I'd like it to be your call."

"Well, I'll say that Commander Shepard was born on Mindoir, but never let what happened there define her. The Commander was a strong biotic and a skilled technician. A deadly combination in a fight. She was a soldier and a leader, one who made peace where she could, and it was a privilege to know her."

Liara crossed to sit down beside Shepard as Shepard chuckled. "Careful this doesn't sound like a diary."

"I can't help myself," Liara sat back to join Shepard as they watched the stars float by from the holo. "You're a good friend, Shepard."

"You've been there for me too, Liara," she said, patting her knee.

"No I haven't..." Liara sighed. "I wish I could have joined you back on Ilium."

"You made up for it," Shepard insisted.

Liara turned her gaze to Shepard with a smirk on her face. "Well, I suppose I _did_ just write your name in the stars."

Shepard's gaze returned to the cycling images and she couldn't help but marvel at the work Liara had put into the project. "Did you do all of this on your shore leave?"

Liara's cheeks flushed a soft purple as she sheepishly pressed her lips together. "The Shadow Broker doesn't get shore leave, Shepard."

Shepard frowned. "If I can get two weeks of uninterrupted down time, I think the Shadow Broker can."

"Perhaps, once the war is over, I will pass on the torch. Feron is very good at his job," Liara mused.

"You deserve it, Liara. You've barely lived a tenth of your life and it's all been absorbed in work. Don't you ever want to settle down?"

"Do you really see me going into civilian life? Even as a child I would get into trouble digging for ruins in the grass at a park near my home on Thessia," Liara admitted with a shrug.

"That's adorable," Shepard said with a chuckle.

"No one else seemed to find it funny," Liara mused, a memory crossing her face making her sigh. Her cheeks flushed again. "I really should get back to work."

Shepard sighed. "All right, but I'd like you with me when we land on Thessia."

"I wouldn't miss it," Liara agreed as she shut down the project and gathered the box in her arms.

* * *

 

Thessia was a war zone. Liara stared at the video feed from outside, her eyes a million light-years away. She still answered questions about the mission and the temple as Shepard asked them, but she was running on auto broker. Shepard exchanged a look with Garrus who hummed in concern for their friend. Shepard and he both knew the sadness in seeing your world burning.

Steve landed them as close to the temple as he could get without drawing too much attention. The fight ahead was rough. Thessia was teeming with Reaper troops, the screeching Banshees not in short supply. After watching one grab up a commando and skewer her on it's foot long talons, Shepard began giving the monstrosities a wider berth. The Asari were fighting back, but the Reapers were relentless. Thessia was falling before their very eyes.

Countless Commandos gave their lives to get Shepard and her team safely to the temple. When they arrived, the promised science team was nowhere to be found. As Liara worked the console to bring down the barrier surrounding the temple, Shepard looked around suspiciously. The Reapers seemed to be avoiding the temple for some unknown reason. Her skin was prickling with a familiar hum and she tried to shake it off and concentrate on the task at hand. When the barrier came down, the hum licked over her skin, settling in to a buzz. She was drawn to a large statue at the front of several rows of pews. The temple was old and Shepard doubted it was in much use anymore. She spotted the bodies of what must have been the scientists, but she couldn't concentrate on much else besides the statue. As she stood in front of it and stared, the words of her crew faded into white noise as the buzz encompassed her. She closed her eyes and reached out to touch the stone work. As soon as her palm made contact with the cold surface, her eyes flew open as she recognized the familiar feeling. "There's a Prothean Beacon here."

Liara stopped mid sentence, her mouth falling open. "What? You're sure?"

"It's not something you forget," Shepard admitted, wondering how she hadn't recognized it sooner.

"But why hide it?" Liara asked as Shepard caught up with the fact that Garrus was kneeling by the scientist's bodies and examining their throats. They had been slit. Obviously the Reapers had not been involved in their deaths. If not them, then who?

"From what you've told me about the one on Mars, these beacons are a motherlode of information." Garrus stood and moved closer to Shepard as he spoke. "Worth keeping quiet about."

"That can't be," Liara shook her head in denial that her people could be hiding something like that from the galaxy. "I can't believe my people would keep this a secret."

Shepard sighed. "A beacon like this could explain why Asari are so advanced."

"You did say this temple was thousands of years old, Liara," Garrus pointed out, his gaze shifting from the statue to the Asari. "That's a lot of time to study it."

"That doesn't make it true," she insisted.

"But think about it," he continued. "A scientific breakthrough every couple centuries and your people would be running the galaxy." he paused and shrugged. "Which they pretty much do."

"Well, if it is true, the Asari should have shared this knowledge," Shepard said softly. "We might not have been in this mess if they had."

"You don't know that, Shepard," Liara argued with a swipe of her hand. "We don't know what's going on here."

"I know we don't have much time to find out," Shepard agreed.

Liara moved to stand in front of the statue and pull up an interface that she studied momentarily. "The few records I can access talk about tapping into Prothean data streams. Reconstructing matrices. None of which I see here..."

Shepard glanced to her right where a small tablet with ancient writing on it drew her attention with a glowing aura. Frowning, she reached out her hand again. "Maybe that's the point."

As soon as her hand made contact, a stream of light reached from the artifact towards the statue and the large likeness of the goddess Athame cracked to reveal the glow of the beacon beneath. Liara backed up a few paces and swore. "By the goddess... Literally."

"Look around," Shepard ordered, convinced it was a pointless order because she was likely the only one able to view the nodes. "There must be more of these connections."

She circled the room and found three more of the glowing artifacts. She touched each of them and in turn the statue cracked further. On the fourth, it fell apart completely, the beacon revealed. As Shepard jogged back to the console in front of the beacon Liara said. "We have to hurry. This place isn't going to..." Her voice trailed off as the beacon was activated and a hovering VI shell floated out from the beacon and stopped in between the three of them. "last... very... long," she finished in awe as she watched the shell hover.

"Obtaining chronological marker. Hold..." the VI stated in a voice much like Javik's. "Time scale established. Post Prothean cycle confirmed."

"What are you?" Shepard asked, slightly relieved that the beacon hadn't flooded her mind like the other two she'd encountered in her hunt for Saren. It was an unpleasant experience.

The shell floated up to the ceiling and said, "Reaper presence detected. This galactic cycle has already reached it's extinction terminus." It floated back to hover before them. "Systems, shutting down."

"Not so fast," Garrus pleaded, his voice urgent as he stopped the shell from zipping back to where it came from.

"We need answers," Shepard demanded of it.

The shell flitted up to hover directly in her face like an annoying insect. "To what questions?" it asked irritably.

"The Catalyst. We need to know what it is to finish the Crucible," she said.

The shell backed away from her and transformed into a flickering holo-image of a Prothean. "A Prothean," Liara gasped gently.

"Or at least a dead one," Garrus agreed, cocking his head to get a better look at the image. "Remember Vigil?"

"I am called Vendetta," the VI stated. "An advanced virtual construct of Pashek Vran. Overseer of the project you refer to as 'Crucible'. He died fighting the Reapers in the battle of Tranbir Nine. Your remaining time is also at an end."

"Were all Protheans so grim?" Liara muttered. Judging by Javik's attitude, they most likely were.

"There's still hope for this cycle," Shepard insisted. "We need to know what the Catalyst is. Trillions of lives are at risk!"

"Trillions of lives are always at risk," the VI pointed out. "But if the Reapers have arrived to end your cycle, this discussion is too late."

"We can break the cycle!" Shepard all but shouted at the VI. If it would just tell her what she needed to know, they could end this war. "We found your plans for the Crucible. We're building it _right now_."

"The Crucible is not of Prothean design," the VI admitted. "It is the work of countless galactic cycles stretching back millions of years. Each cycle adds to it, each improves upon it, thus far none have successfully defeated the Reapers with it."

"Then we'll be the first. Tell us what the Catalyst is!" she demanded, her patience wearing thin.

"If you wish to continue fighting, I will not hinder you, though I deem your odds of success remote."

"We'll take our chances," she said through gritted teeth.

"Very well, if you are following the plans for the Crucible, I will interface with your systems and assist with the Catalyst to...." the VI stopped speaking and turned to look behind Liara. "Indoctrinated presence detected. Activating security protocols." The VI turned back into the round shell it had originally been and flitted back to the Beacon.

Shepard stepped forward, shielding her eyes against the bright headlights of the gunship hovering outside the temple. As the gunship rose out of sight, Shepard spotted the Cerberus assassin walking briskly toward them. He stopped a few feet away and glared at them through his visor. "You," she accused through gritted teeth as she and her team all drew their weapons and aimed them at the threat. "You killed the scientists. What do you want?"

"Your attention," he said simply, his voice gruff. "Someone would like to talk with you." He reached behind him, making Garrus bristle, and pulled out a tiny round device that when he lifted it and opened his omnitool, it hovered toward her at chest height and stopped.

"Shepard," the Illusive Man greeted her as his image appeared around the ball, it still hovered embedded in his chest.

"How did you find this place?" she spat, lowering her gun and trusting her team to cover her back.

"The archives," he stated with a smirk. "Or did your Shadow Broker miss that one?"

Liara snarled, a sound Shepard never thought to hear from her friend. "Show yourself. I promise I won't miss."

"Stick to your talents, Dr. T'Soni," the Illusive Man taunted, passing by and through Shepard as he walked toward the Beacon, looking up at it, the portable holo-projector following his chest. "You've helped uncover the key to subjugating the Reapers."

"Or destroying them," Shepard corrected, crossing her arms over her chest.

He spun around to face her. "Dammit, Shepard! Destroying the Reapers gains us nothing!"

"How about peace?" she suggested.

"They're just trying to control us. Think about it. If they wanted all organic life destroyed, they could do it. There would be nothing left."

"What the hell are you talking about?" she grunted.

"I know them, Shepard. I know how they think."

"I think you've gotten a little too close to the enemy," she sighed, proof of his indoctrination evident.

"No. I'm saying they've got it right. Why kill when you can control?" he asked, his voice wavering.

"You've been spending too much time with the enemy. They're dragging you over to their side, their way of thinking..."

"No, I just..." he paused, his eyes unfocused as he fought to find a reasonable argument. "see things differently."

"If you truly care about humanity, you'll stop fighting me," she snapped, trying to make him see reason. "You'll join me."

"Don't ever question my intentions," he spat, apparently her choice of words the wrong ones. "I've sacrificed more for humanity than you'll ever know." His voice lowered and his eyes narrowed. "And don't assume you know me. My methods for dealing with the Reapers are simply more refined than yours."

"You have forgotten everything you stood for," she argued. "Cerberus was supposed to be humanity's sword, not a dagger in our back!"

He smirked like he was amused. "Poetic, but as usual, you missed the point. The world is more grey than you care to admit."

"With the Prothean data in this beacon, I can end this conflict, once and for all. You're either with me or against me. There's nothing grey about that," she disputed.

"No, I suppose there isn't." He walked past her and back toward Kai Leng who was pacing in agitation. "Leng, the Commander has something I need. Please relieve her of it and then bring me the data." The Illusive Man faded and the ball hovered back to Leng's waiting palm. The Asian man grinned as he placed the ball back in his belt and spun his sword in a display meant to threaten.

Shepard wasn't impressed. She pulled her own pistol and took cover as she charged her overload. His shields had been a huge issue the last time they fought and she intended to do something about it. She called Garrus over to her and he complied as Leng flitted around the room, keeping Liara busy as she distracted him. She signaled he charge his overload and then grabbed his omnitool hand with hers and waited for his tool to chirp it's readiness. He nodded as he realized her intention and gave his hand over to her to do with as she pleased. She grabbed the charged program from his tool and interfaced it with hers at the exact same time, doubling the charge of the electric spark that snapped on Leng, dropping his shields. Liara threw a warp at him and it was followed by Shepard's own. Before they could hit him with anything else, he called in the gunship to lay down covering fire as he recharged his shields. They repeated the process once more before Leng realized what they were doing. After the gunship disappeared the second time, Shepard set up her overload and then called her biotics to charge into him. She collided with him and he back-flipped away before she could lay a hand on him. He swung his sword so quickly that she was finding it hard to see the damned thing as it disappeared in a streak with the speed. She activated her omni blade and blocked a few of his swings, but he was just too fast. She saw his shields lighting up as Garrus tried to overload them and take a sniper shot at the threat. Liara's singularity hovered uselessly beside him, his own biotics trained enough that he could keep on his feet and not get sucked into the gravity field. His sword came down past her cheek as she jumped backwards. The blade sliced open her face, the pain not even hitting her until she felt the dribble of blood down her chin. She scowled and he smirked, coming at her again and reaching forward to try and gut her like he had Thane. She danced to the side and grabbed a hold of his other arm and discharged her overload, taking down his shields. Then she automatically charged backwards to get away from him. Garrus tried to shoot him, but his blade swung in an arc and he blocked the bullet. His shields were down and she knew what that meant. She ducked down behind the front pew beside Garrus whose eyes were wide at the damage to her face. "Spirits, a few inches deeper and we'd be picking your cheek up from the floor, Shepard."

Her face stung as the bullets from the gunship peppered the bench in front of them. She did her best to smile at him as he gently applied a quick swipe of medigel, but couldn't help the hiss of pain as his finger swiped over the wound. He grimaced, and shrugged apologetically. "When the gunship retreats, you overload and I'll incinerate." she said, already charging the incinerate program. "As soon as his shield is down, I'm going to charge him again and then immediately slap him with a Nova. With any luck, that will take him down. Or at least weaken him enough to get a few shots off."

"I hate this plan, Shepard," Garrus sighed, not questioning, but letting her know he disapproved.

"I'm not loving it either, but right now, it's all I've got. We'll be here all night before we kill him if we don't switch up our strategy."

He nodded, his mandibles pulled tightly to his face and the gunship stopped firing. He set off his overload and she followed it up with her incinerate. Liara's warp whipped toward him and Shepard heard his shields fall. She was ready, immediately charging. As soon as she landed in front of him, he staggered without his shields to protect him. Then she jumped up and used the kinetic energy from her body to slam a Nova into the ground around him. He growled angrily as she scurried away from him and took cover expecting the gunship to return. Garrus had stepped out of his cover and was firing round after round with his assault rifle. Liara was nearly on top of Shepard's position in the middle of the aisle, her SMG firing rapidly. Leng flipped his sword so the blade was facing down and said, "There's only one way this ends..." he buried the sword's point in the ground leaving it standing and ran towards Liara. He slapped her gun out of her hands and knocked her off balance so he could grab her neck and casually toss her with the strength of his biotics directly into Garrus. They both fell in a tangle of limbs and Shepard tried to vault over her cover and fire at him, but he threw up a biotic barrier to block her bullets. She grunted in anger as he smirked and touched a finger to his comm. "Target the supports."

The gunship reappeared, but this time instead of firing at her and her people, it fired at the large pillars that were holding the building up. Liara and Garrus had recovered, but the rockets blew all three of them off their feet as Leng casually walked up to the Beacon and interfaced with the panel. It was all Shepard could do to keep out of the way of falling debris. The whole place was coming down around them. As a large section of pillar fell behind her, it crashed through the floor and she stumbled as the floor fell out from under her. Her pistol was knocked from her grip and she cursed as she grabbed hold of a piece of the ground before falling into the abyss. She felt the piece of ground she was clinging to reach a stop and she glanced around picking out a way back up to the surface. She saw a section of the floor that hadn't completely broken apart and picked her way carefully toward the makeshift ladder. She painstakingly climbed the narrow edge of the otherwise slick vertical flooring. When she reached the top, Leng was making his way back toward his sword. She grabbed hold of the flat ground at the top and scrambled to get up. She nearly lost her grip as the floor she had climbed decided to detach and fall. She dangled with one hand slipping slowly off the edge. She felt her heart skip as her grip gave out, she gasped in fear, but a hand grabbed hers. "Shepard!" Liara shouted. "Hang on." Shepard grabbed hold of Liara and she helped her climb over the edge and they rolled to lie flat on the ground, Shepard taking a split second to catch her breath before jumping up and grabbing her pistol that was still lying on the ground. She fired at the gunship as it took off, wasting three bullets before realizing they had lost. Leng was gone with the data. Her shoulders slumped as the others came up behind her.

She watched the ship fly off and then her comm hissed. "Anyone on this frequency?" a female voice called out in desperation. "This is Lieutenant Kurin! My squad is trapped."

"This is Shepard! Give us your location!" she called out, ready to answer the distress call.

"I repeat! Is anyone on this frequency?"

"We read you, give me your lo..." Shepard shouted, hoping she might be heard.

Her sentence was interrupted by a different voice. "The Lieutenant's down! The whole zone is collapsing. What happened to Shepard? Did they make it to the temple?"

Another voice answered as she listened on helplessly. "I saw them... Wait! I've got a Reaper inbound!"

Shepard saw the Reaper in question and two others landing off in the distance as the woman screamed as she was killed. The other voice pleaded. "Please, is anybody there? I... oh goddess... No!" The other voice was silenced and Shepard hung her head then shook off Liara's comforting hand from her shoulder before turning away in anger, her heart breaking at the loss of Thessia to the Reapers.

* * *

 

She stood in shock, staring hopelessly at the flashing light on the QEC. They'd returned to the Normandy and she had made herself a hermit in her room, waiting for the inevitable call from the Asari councilor. When EDI had informed her that the woman was waiting for her in the comm room, she'd mindlessly made her way down to the QEC. Now she couldn't bear to open the link. Finally, she gathered herself and sighed, pushing away from the wall where she had pressed her head against the cool surface. She opened the link and leaned both hands on the console to keep them from fidgeting. "Commander Shepard, are you there?" came the hopeful voice through the static. Her throat closed up and she couldn't look the woman in the face. "Commander?"

"Councilor... the mission..." she began, solemnly but she wasn't allowed to finish.

"Contact with Thessia has been cut off. When will the Crucible be ready to use?"

"Councilor," she inserted a bit more urgently to prevent further interruption. "I wish the news was better. We didn't get the information."

"Why not?" the Councilor asked, her voice both sorrowful and fearful.

"Cerberus was there. We were..." she choked on her next words as the councilor pinched the bridge of her nose in frustration. "We were defeated. We don't know how to finish the Crucible."

"I... don't know what to say... What was the situation on Thessia?" she asked, her tone saying she already knew the answer.

"Deteriorating fast. The Reapers are there in strength," Shepard reported, trying not to hear the voices of the dying commandos over her comm again.

"Then I should be going," the councilor said urgently. "Plans... must be put into motion... Continuity of civilization has to be considered. I never imagined this day would come." She hung her head sadly and Shepard flinched.

"None of us did," she sighed. "I'm..." her final word was cut off as the councilor shut down the connection. "sorry..." she finished as the room went dark.

As she made her way slowly out of the comm room, she saw some of her people gathered around the war table and studying the real time holo of Thessia. EDI saw her emerge and said, "Asari forces are in full retreat. It is no longer safe for us to remain in this system."

"Get us out of here," she sighed.

Liara didn't turn from where she leaned heavily on the war table's perimeter. "Shepard, I..." she paused, her voice catching as she fought tears. Then she finally turned to look at Shepard, her bright blue eyes glistening. " _Nobody_ could have predicted Cerberus would reach Thessia before us."

"It's my job to be prepared... no matter what," she disagreed. Kai Leng getting over on her again was a massive punch to the gut. "And now Thessia's lost... As is the data on the Catalyst." She clenched her fists and settled them with a bang on the console. "I'm sick of Cerberus beating us to the punch."

"Let's kick them in the balls first for a change," James piped up from across the room.

She deactivated the war table holo so she could get a good look at her friends. "I'm with James. Anyone know where they're hiding?" she asked, glancing around the table at all the faces. "Anyone?" she noticed EDI and Traynor exchanging glances and narrowed her eyes.

"Um..." Traynor began to wring her hands together and continued. "Well, there is something."

"Let's hear it Traynor..." she encouraged. The woman was always good for obscure intel.

"I was able to track Kai Leng's shuttle through the relay and extrapolate his destination." Her hands stopped wringing and she began tapping on the console in front of her, bringing up the tracking data on a small replica of the galaxy map. "The signal disappeared in the Iera system."

"Naturally," Shepard said with a sigh.

"It's not just gone though. The signal is being actively blocked," Traynor pointed out.

"How?" she asked, a bit of hope rising in her chest.

"I'm not sure, but something is interfering with all signal activity in that region of space."

EDI turned her attention from Traynor. "Commander, the Iera system is home to Sanctuary and little else. Sanctuary is a supposed safe haven for war refugees."

"You think it's worth checking out, Traynor?" Shepard trusted her judgement. She had yet to be wrong.

"Yes ma'am, I do," she said with confidence, her hands linking behind her back as she stood straighter.

"If Specialist Traynor hadn't examined the data so astutely, the interference would have been undetectable," EDI said pointedly.

"Nice work, Traynor. You've given us a shot. Now let's make sure we don't waste it." Shepard said moving to leave the war room and find out where Garrus was.

"I was stationed on Horizon in the Iera system," Kaidan said with mild skepticism. "You were the only Cerberus presence while I was there."

"It's a slim lead," Liara said softly. "Let's hope it's the right one."

Shepard refused to let the hope dwindle. "I don't care how slim the leads are at this point. We've come too far to let Cerberus stop us. I want that Prothean data. I want the Catalyst. No excuses. Dismissed," she barked, spinning and leaving the room in silence.

She hurried to the cockpit to let Joker know they were headed to Horizon and then went to the elevator to find Garrus. Her cheek was throbbing from the five stitches that Chakwas had insisted she get after they got back. She had been in a haze, thinking far too hard about her failure. Most of what happened after Steve picked them up was a blur. She was slowly remembering that Garrus and Liara had gotten batted around pretty good by Leng and she had a sneaking suspicion he had an injury he hadn't told her about.

She got off the elevator and ran into Tali in front of the memorial wall. She glanced at Shepard but her feelings behind the helmet were unreadable. Shepard sighed and went around the elevator toward the mess. Garrus wasn't in the medbay that she could tell through the windows, so she headed for the battery. He was leaning heavily on the console that he had converted into his own war table with updates on Turian movements. She walked silently up behind him, but she knew he had heard her enter and had probably smelled her before she even hit the doorway. He straightened slightly, favoring his right side and his head cocked to glance over his shoulder. "Any word from your family?" she asked gently, knowing he had heard nothing since the night they'd stayed up to hear the broken message from his sister.

"They made it off Palaven," he said briefly, knowing she was aware. "It was tight, but they're okay."

"That's fantastic," she said, approaching him to grip his bicep as he turned to face her. "That must be a weight off your shoulders."

"It is, though this being a war, one burden replaces another," he sighed.

"What happened?" she asked, working her way up to asking about his injury. As he gently traced her cheek above where the cut began.

"I just had to make a tough call with the Primarch," he admitted, going back to poking at his console. "He said our fleets are being decimated, so I advised him to cease all offensive operations against the Reapers."

"A full retreat?" she asked, moving up beside him to study the movements for herself.

"The only way to save Palaven now is to hold our ships back for the Crucible... but if I'm wrong then a lot of other Turian families won't be as lucky as mine."

She could see the weight of the world on his shoulders like she was certain he could see her burden of running this war. "That's a hell of a gamble," she said with a sigh, but agreeing with his assessment. "No other options?"

"If there are, I can't see them," he said, his head hung low. "It all comes down to the crucible now."

"And ruthless calculus," she said, remembering back to the conversation they'd had months ago about the acceptable amount of deaths to save other lives.

He sighed heavily and pushed away from the console. "How are you holding up, Shepard? This all has to be taking a toll." He was always worrying about her over his own problems.

She meant to lie, but the words spilled from her lips. "There's only so much fight in a person. Only so much death you can take before..."

"Before a certain Turian with no romantic skills to speak of tries to cheer you up?" he asked, snaking his arm around her waist.

"Cheer? Coming from you?" she smirked.

"Hmm... mood swings..." he said, his mandibles spreading. "Don't worry. We'll get through this. We always do." He pulled her closer then winced as his injury protested.

"Did you go see Chakwas?" she asked softly.

He grunted. "It's just a bruised plate. I'll be fine in a day or two. What's the outlook for your face?"

"I can never tell with my upgrades, but we might both be sporting scars on our cheeks," she admitted with a shrug. "It is pretty sore, but I don't want to put too much medigel on it. We all know what happened last time I over did it."

He hummed, a small grin gracing his features. "I don't remember it being all _that_ bad."

"I really imagined the first time I told you I loved you might be a bit more romantic," she sighed.

"What's more romantic than a fire fight?" he asked teasingly.

"You're so twisted," she smirked, with a gentle nudge to his shoulder from her head.

"But _you_ love me. What does that say about you?" he quipped.

She sighed, relaxing into his hug a little tighter for a brief moment. "I should go check on Liara."

He hummed his agreement and she regretfully pulled away from his warm embrace and hugged herself instead to retain some of the warmth. When she didn't find Liara in her cabin, she hunted her down, asking EDI where the Asari might be.

Shepard made her way down to the cargo bay where as soon as she stepped off the elevator she heard raised voices. She quickened her pace as Liara shouted. "That's not true! We earned our place in the galaxy!"

"Stop denying reality, Asari. Your people took the knowledge of my people from the beacon," Javik said calmly as Shepard entered the room. Liara was pacing in agitation as Javik watched her with clear annoyance on his face.

Liara's temper spiked and she glowed blue as her biotics flooded to the surface. "I have a name! It's Liara T'Soni! And I'd appreciate..."

Shepard interjected before Javik got knocked on his ass by the normally soft spoken woman. "Hey," she said, grabbing Liara's arm to calm her. "Settle down," she soothed.

"My home was just destroyed... and all he can do is gloat!" Liara growled, turning her ire on Shepard who knew she wouldn't hurt her.

"Given what's happened today, I think you owe Liara an apology, Javik," Shepard said calmly.

"Apologize for the truth?" Javik asked curiously, crossing his arms over his chest.

"For not doing more!" Liara corrected. "You're a Prothean! You're supposed to have all the answers! How could you not stop this from happening?" Liara sobbed.

"We believed you would..." he stated with a shrug. Liara's biotics reigned in and she glanced at Shepard, her soft blue glow fading. "Long ago, we saw the potential in your people. Even then, it was obvious. The wisdom, the patience... You were the best hope for this cycle, so you were... guided, when necessary."

"Well, it didn't work," she said with a sigh, her eyes lowering.

"You're still alive aren't you?" he asked. "Your world may have fallen, but as long as even one Asari is left standing, the fight isn't over."

"I guess that goes for Protheans, too," she agreed with a small smile.

"Despair is the enemy's greatest weapon. Do not let them wield it, Liara T'Soni," he said with a short bow of his head.

Her smile faded and she turned and left, all of the wind blown out of her sails. Shepard turned to Javik and said. "That was... unexpected. Thank you."

"We still need her talents. If grief overcomes her, she will be lost to us," Javik said coldly. It was more in line with what she had come to expect from the self proclaimed embodiment of Vengeance.

"So did you actually mean what you said?" Shepard asked, approaching closer to him.

"Does it matter?" he retorted.

"Liara means a great deal to me. It matters..." she insisted.

"Then I will tell you what you want to hear... I meant what I said." He uncrossed his arms and turned to lean on his water table.

"Carry on," she grumbled with an eyeroll and left to check back in on Liara.

Tali still waited outside the elevator and Shepard wondered what she was doing there. Her question was answered when she over heard the conversation with Garrus. She had been waiting to talk to Liara, but when Liara had finally arrived, she had went straight to her cabin without a word. Now, Tali was afraid to go in because she had no idea what to say to her. Shepard patted Tali briefly and removed the burden from her by saying she would talk to her.

She hesitantly approached Liara's door. It hadn't been locked so she let herself in after knocking softly. EDI was in the middle of comforting Liara over the comm from the bridge and Shepard waited patiently as the AI made a very human point. After she thanked EDI, Liara looked up and sighed, the unshed tears welling in her eyes. "How did this happen, Shepard? Did I just assume the Asari would be ready? That the council would protect them? Or was I so busy with the Catalyst that I ignored my own people..."

"Liara, you had nothing to do with the attack on Thessia," Shepard insisted as Liara sat huddled on her bed, data pads surrounding her. Even as she grieved she was trying to bury herself in work.

"Nothing to do with it?" she growled, the tears finally falling down her cheeks. "I told those people on Thessia we'd save them. How many Asari died because I demanded their help?"

"None," Shepard replied, slapping her hand down on the mattress.

"Shepard, that isn't true," Liara insisted.

"You've been warning your people for _four_ years, Liara." She turned from the bed and moved to Liara's broker terminal and started looking up ways for Liara to busy herself and remove some of the guilt from her shoulders. "There's not a damn thing you should feel guilty about. If we move fast enough, they'll have a chance to survive, start again. We lost Thessia, but we haven't lost the Asari yet."

Liara dragged herself from the bed and made her way over to Shepard. "Helping the refugees..." she suggested. "That's something I can do. It's something I owe them."

"I knew you'd think of something," Shepard smirked, her cheek stretching and the throbbing jumping back with a vengeance.

"I still need some time, Shepard," Liara said softly taking over the console as Shepard stepped away. "But, thank you."

 


	37. Cutting the Head off the Dog

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time to deal with Cerberus.

A day later, they were approaching Horizon. Shepard watched out the display of the shuttle, her armor heavy on her shoulders as she still mourned the failure on Thessia. "So, what do we know, Shepard?" Garrus asked standing up and moving to stand beside her.

"EDI?" Shepard asked over her comm as Tali joined them to get a read on the quiet planet.

"The Sanctuary facility was devoted to aiding refugees from Reaper controlled systems," EDI purred over the comm. Shepard remembered hearing rumors on the Citadel while they were there, but nothing had ever jumped out at her. "The facility went offline recently, and no communications have come or gone since." From the readings, the facility looked deserted. They wouldn't know much without a closer look. "It is unclear why Kai Leng or Cerberus would be interested in Sanctuary."

"We don't leave until we're one step closer to Cerberus," Shepard growled. The Illusive Man had made an enemy of her and she was determined that he would not survive the fall of Thessia.

"Ma'am," Steve drew her attention to the cockpit and she shuffled her way to stand behind him. "I'm picking up a signal from the facility. It's weak, but I'll try to boost it."

A strangely familiar voice flooded through the fuzzy signal. "This is Oriana Lawson. Stay away from Sanctuary. It's not what it seems. Please, you must listen to me. They're using..."

The signal cut out and Shepard gritted her teeth. "Oriana? Miranda's sister?" Tali mused, joining Shepard behind Steve's seat.

"Looks like we found our first link to Cerberus," Shepard agreed. "If she's here, Miranda can't be far away." Miranda had spent the entire war trying to find her sister. She had to be here.

"Approaching the LZ," Steve announced as the shuttle descended. "Seeing some damage, Commander, but no activity."

"Cerberus does _not_ get the jump on us this time," Shepard reiterated as the hatch opened to let the team out. She hopped to the ground and glanced around, her shotgun ready. The entrance to Sanctuary was a war zone without the soldiers. There was destroyed building and debris everywhere. Fires were burning around crashed shuttles, but there were no bodies. Something was very wrong. Her skin crawled as she moved forward. "Stay sharp, people."

"Pretty big mess, Shepard. Lot's of combat," Garrus grumbled, coming to the same conclusions she had.

"Yeah, but who was fighting?" she wondered, unable to shake the unease that seemed to seep from the walls of the large building ahead. As she hit the bottom of the entry steps, her comms screamed with electronic feedback then fell silent. She grunted, almost pawing at her ear. "Everyone hear that?"

"Yeah, radio's offline. Something's jamming our signals," Garrus agreed, shaking his own head.

"Explains no comms leaving the facility," she sighed and continued up the stairs, her eyes scanning the area for any sign of life. It was starting to feel like a ghost town.

A few steps past the top landing, a booming crash sounded over head. "Shepard, look!" Tali shouted and she watched a shuttle fall from the sky, spinning horizontally before smashing into the balcony at the second floor of the building.

Moments later a Harvester's metallic resonance roar pierced the relative silence as it flew triumphantly away. "You see the Harvester?" Garrus said almost in awe.

"I saw it!" she agreed as Cerberus troops began to pour from the downed shuttle. A sniper took up a spot on the balcony while some of their Phantom fighters cloaked and most likely dropped down to cause trouble for her and her squad. "Phantoms!" she warned so her people would not be caught off guard.

"Take 'em out before they get close!" Garrus called, as she realized Tali had never gone up against the quick little bitches.

His visor gave him a readout of the general location of the Phantoms, and Shepard quickly called up her visor interface so she had a better view for herself. "Tali! On your 10, watch it!" she warned as the Phantom tried to get behind Tali. Shepard tossed a quick throw at the Phantom to push her back. Tali fired in the general direction with her shotgun, clipping the Phantom and dropping the cloak.

"Shepard! Four o'clock!" Garrus shouted and she spun, her visor showing her the outline of vital signs flitting toward her. The Phantom was right on top of her. Her arms pinwheeled as she ducked backwards out of the way of the sword. When she came back up, she called up her omni blade and took a defensive stance. Garrus sniped another Phantom on his 2 and returned his attention to her after making sure there were no more. A bullet slapped the ground at her feet, barely skimming past her chest as she backed away from the ninja moves of the Phantom.

"Take out that sniper!" she called, knowing that he couldn't help her with the Phantom without risking hitting her. The Phantom arched her sword by Shepard's neck. Barely missing and continued her onslaught. Shepard called her biotics and threw a shockwave to get some distance between her and the Phantom. It worked for about a second before the Phantom recovered. The second was enough to start her incinerate charging. While her omnitool loaded the program, she blocked some punches and kicks from the woman, grabbing her leg and wrenching her off her feet. The Phantom's kick up was flawless and Shepard gritted her teeth trying to reach for her shotgun but the Phantom was relentless. Shepard lashed out with her omniblade and the Phantom got around her and stabbed for her gut. She danced to the side, the blade nicking her hip. As if the Phantom smelled her blood, she charged in with renewed vigor and Shepard moved as quickly as possible to block the incoming storm. The sword found her three more times, the cut on her thigh pretty deep. When the incinerate pinged it's readiness, she held it back, and grabbed the Phantom the next time she stepped close enough. She held on to her wrist tightly and deployed the incinerate. Shepard gagged as the Phantom boiled from the inside out, her skin melting off her face. The smell choked Shepard and she dropped the woman's wrist and backed away doubling over and retching. Garrus was at her side and Tali jogged up, her omnitool scanning for all of Shepard's injuries. When she caught her breath, standing downwind, she stood straight then when her thigh complained, she stumbled and Garrus caught her.

"Hold still," Tali tsked, taking a pouch of medigel from Garrus who always carried his own supply of levo products, knowing she neglected herself most times.

As he supported her weight, he grumbled his disapproval. "You never should have removed that auto dispenser from your suit."

"It's too tempting to push past the pain and over do things when you have control over your own supply," she grunted as Tali's fingers probed her thigh to find the entry and exit of her wound. "You saw what happened on Eden Prime."

He shook his head. "The fast acting dispenser could be the difference between life and death. _You_ found that out on Therum. You almost bled out because there was no time to apply the medigel."

She argued back. "It hinders my abilities, makes me reckless."

He raised his brow plates, his unending patience thinning. "You're already reckless, Shepard." The chuckle at his quip was forced. "I'd rather have you high and spouting your love from the rooftops as you charge into Brutes, than not have you at all."

Tali paused in her ministrations to sigh enchantedly. Shepard couldn't help but feel the same. It wasn't often that he so openly exposed his emotions, but when he did, her heart would flutter rapidly and her knees went weak. It was no different out here in the middle of a mission as he held her still as she bled. He simply had that effect on her. She tucked her head by his and he wrapped his arms a bit tighter around her. Their armor kept them apart, but she placed her lips close to his mandible and whispered so softly she knew Tali couldn't hear. "I love you."

He grunted and moved to touch his forehead to hers. "That's just the medigel talking," he muttered as his subharmonics purred out his real response. Though he'd never said the words, she'd heard his truth, buried close to his heart.

"All done," Tali announced, rising from her crouch. "Did you two need a minute?" Her tone teased as she cocked her hips.

Shepard tested her leg, putting weight on the injury. It hurt, but she felt she could continue. "I'm alright," she said as his arm hovered by her side. She patted his upper arm and he dropped his protective arm. "Thanks, Tali." She turned her attention to him and they shared a private expression. "You too, Big Guy. Come on, let's see what's going on here."

"Looks like they were evacuating," Tali said, following behind the limping Shepard.

"And... looks like the Reapers were chasing them out," Garrus agreed.

"About time they started killing each other," Shepard said as she passed inside the glass front door of the facility that was still amazingly intact among the rubble.

The inside of the facility was almost as bad as the outside. An abandoned husk of a building, damaged and falling apart. "What happened here?" Garrus wondered aloud.

"I don't know," she sighed. "Come on."

"Cerberus shuttles! Came from that tower!" Tali pointed up to the large glass ceiling of the entry way. Sure enough, there were several shuttles flying Cerberus colors leaving the facility.

Shepard narrowed her eyes. Something had drawn the Reapers here. What was Cerberus up to? "Then that's where we're headed."

She pushed forward, finding signs of the refugee camp that had been set up there. Security footage showed thousands of people entering the facility, but where were they now? "They must have felt safe inside these walls..." Garrus hummed sadly. "And then it all went bad."

As they tried to find a way to the tower, they came upon bodies of both Cerberus and Reaper forces. They had been fighting each other for some time. Some Cerberus troops attacked them, but they easily fought them off and pushed ahead. Shepard found a console near a back door and there was a looped message playing beneath static. "That's Miranda," she said as she recognized the voice.

She pulled up the message and listened as Miranda's face appeared on the screen. "This is Miranda Lawson. If you've managed to get this far, you must be desperate or stupid. Listen to me. This is _not_ a refugee camp. This is a Cerberus facility run by my father, Henry Lawson. Turn back now. There is no help to be found here... all communication is being blocked from the central tower. Sanctuary is a lie. Stay away!"

"Okay," Shepard sighed. "So we've got Cerberus, Reapers and Miranda's crazy father. Any ideas how this all fits?"

There were shrugs from both Tali and Garrus and she reset the looping message. They came upon a console shortly to drain the large pool of water that was blocking their way to the tower. Shepard hacked the controls and the water started to quickly lower. It was designed to empty as fast as possible. "Look at the water," Tali said in awe.

"That's Cerberus tech alright," Garrus pointed out as the water revealed a butt load of machines and systems. "But there's something different about it."

"Modifications?" Shepard mused.

"A _lot_ of modifications," Garrus agreed.

"We have a back door into the facility. Let's move," she said, starting down a nearby ladder into the emptied pool. The strain on her leg was excruciating, but she breathed through the pain and limped with determination toward the locked door she saw across the way.

Garrus stopped her mid way and scanned the piping with his omnitool. "That looks like Reaper technology. I'm sure of it. The question is, what is Cerberus using it for?"

He was right in assuming it was Reaper tech, but she didn't have the same sticky feeling that she usually associated with Reapers. "The answer has to be here somewhere."

Once inside, Tali sighed as Shepard worked on the second door. "Cerberus... and using Reaper technology. This is going to be bad, isn't it?"

As they moved forward, they found what looked like a command center. The power was offline and Shepard hunted for a switch. Finding one, she flipped it on, and the screens all came back online. "What is this?" Garrus growled as the scene played out before them in the form of old security footage.

"Those are refugees..." Tali gasped as they saw the people being paraded into pods and gassed. Shepard narrowed her eyes, her cybernetic implants picking up on the gruesome truth of what had happened to all of the people who had come to Sanctuary looking for help. "They're just... killing them?"

Shepard shook her head. "Worse," she sighed, wishing she wasn't seeing what she was. "They're being turned into husks." The large observation window in front of her looked out on the facility. The walls were lined with rows of human sized pods, all empty. The lights came on and Shepard saw figures scurrying away from the sudden change in their environment. She moved around the desk to stand closer to the window and as she glared down into the large room, she was startled a few steps back as a husk smacked onto the glass in front of her out of nowhere. She forced herself forward and noticed that they were everywhere, climbing the walls like cockroaches. She shuddered and moved away. "Come on..."

"Why create more husks? They're just more troops for the Reapers..." Tali said, trying to make sense of the madness. "They could destroy the facility if they escaped. It seems like a stupid risk."

Shepard agreed. There was more to this, but she was not certain why the Illusive Man would do this. They stumbled upon another recording of Miranda and Shepard stopped to listen, hoping for answers or guidance. "Reaper forces have made a mess of the facility. I'm shutting down the power to the processing plant to lock them down. Should keep them out of the entrance as well." Miranda said then moved on.

Shepard was ready to move on herself, but Tali stopped her as she noticed more to the video. "Kai Leng! Shepard, she doesn't know he's here!"

Leng moved into the sight of the camera and spoke. "Miranda Lawson has arrived sooner than expected. You want me to deal with her?"

"Only if she gets in your way," The Illusive Man answered him. "Stay focused on the research data. Find it and get out."

Shepard sighed. She'd warned Miranda more than once about Kai Leng. "Damn it. Let's move!"

As soon as they entered into the body of the facility, they were overrun with husks. Shepard threw as many shockwaves as her injuries would allow. Her blood pressure was low and overdoing the biotics was a really bad idea. She saw Garrus' unwavering vigil while they fought. His subvocals were raging with concern and she shrugged it off. He could worry all he wanted, but they had a job to do. This place was almost as terrible as the Collector Base. The atrocities committed here were unforgivable. The next room offered up a few consoles that when activated spouted logs by none other than Henry Lawson himself, marveling at the process of creating husks and their progress. Having heard enough, Shepard turned the corner and nearly walked head first into a Banshee. How had the thing snuck up on them? She backpedaled as the thing swiped at her with it's angry talons and shrieked. It's middle three fingers left scratch marks in her chest plate and her eyes widened as she panicked. It was way too close. "Nova!" she shouted in warning as she called her biotics and slammed her fist down to the floor. The circular shockwave knocked the Banshee away and drew the attention of some more Reaper troops further along the corridor. Garrus grabbed her by the back of her armor and tugged her back in the room with him and Tali. Tali locked the mechanical door behind them.

"Spirits! I hate those things," he cursed, noticing the marks on her armor.

She pointed past him to Tali's right. "That door will take us around the side. We can flank it if we're careful."

"You sure you're okay?" he asked.

"I'll be fine," she insisted, knowing part of her leg wound had opened back up when she'd crouched to unleash the Nova. She could feel the blood trickling down past her knee. They didn't have time to stop and administer medigel. There was an open path between them and the Reapers and if they weren't quick, they'd be the ones that got flanked.

It was hard fought as she did her best to stay out of reach of the Banshee and whittle down it's barrier as the only one with biotics in the group. She exhausted most of her reserves and felt her amp heating up from over use. Luckily Garrus and Tali were able to take down the two Marauders and the Rachni Ravager so she didn't need to worry about getting hit from other sources as she struggled with the mutated Asari. As soon as it's barrier fell, the blue glow disappearing from around it, Garrus stood and took a perfect head shot, the bullet nearly ripping the thing's head completely off at such close range. She dropped in place, sighing. She needed a break to recharge her amp and get more medigel on her leg. Garrus was at her side in seconds. "Damn it, Shepard."

"I know, I know," she grumbled, hissing as his fingers probed the gash in her thigh.

"If not for your implants, you probably would have at the very least lost consciousness by now," he chided, working swiftly to pull a fresh packet of medigel from his belt. "Why are you so stubborn?" he grumbled in between Turian curses.

"You wouldn't have me any other way," she said, grinning past her headache.

He harrumphed as the medigel ran dry and he stood. He reached down to offer her a hand up. She bent the knee of her good leg and put all her weight on it as he pulled her to her feet. He pulled her into him and leaned his mouth down toward her ear so Tali, who had wandered to check out some of the consoles on the far side of the room, couldn't hear. "I think I'm in the process of one of those miniature heart attacks you so like to give me."

She pressed her cheek to his and said, "You know if you pass out from worry, I'll have to carry you back to the Normandy. Imagine the strain that would put on my injuries."

He chuckled, the sound vibrating through her chest. "Thanks. I feel sooo much better now," he said.

"Glad I could help." She planted a short kiss on his mandible before pulling away and testing her weight again. Her limp was worsening, but there was nothing to be done. They needed to find Miranda and shut this place down. Maybe even nuke it off the map.

After a few more logs along their path, Garrus grumbled. "Hard to imagine what this place was like in full operation."

She didn't want to think about it. Instead, she found a console with another of Miranda's messages attached. "Terminal's damaged. Hang on."

She knelt, taking the weight off her injury and pulled the panel from the bottom of the console. The wiring was fried and she set to work to repair it. "Reapers wanted this place shut down," Garrus mused as he kept watch. "Maybe we'll find out why." So far, where the Reapers had come from was still a mystery.

"It doesn't make sense," she agreed, splicing two wires together "I thought Cerberus and the Reapers were getting along... What changed?"

"You got it, Shepard," he said in response when the console hissed and came to life. There was no video, but the audio was clear.

"Heading to the Tower to disable the communications scrambler. I have to get word out! Some refugees are turned into husks. Some are indoctrinated and shipped to the Illusive Man. Whoever's left is used in experiments. The data indicates that my father is trying to figure out how Reaper indoctrination works."

Shepard clenched her fists and punched the console. "Tricking refugees with food and shelter only to turn them into test subjects. And for what?"

Garrus touched her shoulder with a chuff. "Draw them in and throw 'em in a meat grinder..."

"She said that shipments were sent to the Illusive Man," Tali pointed out, crossing her arms over her stomach as if she felt sickened. "Maybe we can use that to find him."

"Good catch," Shepard agreed, taking out her pistol, ready to move on. "Come on, Miranda said she was headed to the tower.

The next room they met with more Reaper troops, but nothing too big. Shepard saved back her biotics in case she might need them further along. Another console from Miranda gave them proof of what was going on at the facility and how the Reapers had found them. Henry Lawson had been studying Reaper indoctrination and had found the signals that Reapers sent out to control their subjects. The Illusive Man had tasked him with turning them against the Reapers so they could control the Reapers instead. It's what he had been talking about using the Crucible for. The husks were the test subjects to see if it was working. "Controlling Reaper forces?" Tali asked, her voice shocked. "Is that even possible?"

"Now we know why the Reapers attacked Sanctuary," Shepard sighed angrily. They must have picked up on the signals that they'd been experimenting on.

"Figured Cerberus out," Garrus agreed. "Tough break for the Illusive Man."

"But it's good news for us," she said. "We finally have our link to Cerberus... Lowering the access ladder. Come on, let's move."

She turned and headed for the ladder that had descended, but Garrus stopped her. "Hold up, Shepard. There's more."

She returned her attention to the screen which showed a short clip of Kai Leng dropping from the ceiling into Miranda's midst, knocking her back with a Nova as he hit the ground. The video cut out shortly after. "Damn it, I hope she's ready for him."

They climbed the ladder and fought through more Reaper troops to get to a machine on a track that was meant for moving pods around. They climbed on top and rode it the other end of the facility to get to the access area for the Tower elevator.

There was heavy resistance, just as Miranda had warned. Two Brutes and a Banshee in close quarters were fixing to ruin Shepard's day. She glanced back and forth between the threats, wishing she had a tactical cloak to just sneak by them. Garrus grabbed her arm and she glanced back at him. "I don't have a plan for this, Big Guy," she whispered. He sighed, as she saw an idea cross his features. "What have you got?" she pushed, knowing he was seeing every outcome flash through his tactical mind.

"I have a few grenades..." he began, his voice trailing off.

"I have some too," Tali offered, earning a glare from him.

"Come on, Garrus. What are you thinking?" Shepard asked.

He sighed again, his subvocals not at all happy with what he was about to say. "Use your biotics to mod the grenades with a stasis field that will erect on detonation. It might keep the Brutes off of us long enough to drop the Banshee..."

"But?" she prompted, practically tasting the word on his tongue.

"But, you know your biotics are weakened and you are the only one who can take down the Banshee's barrier. Between modding the grenades and the added strain of fighting the Banshee, it's going to be a hard fight for you. Can you handle it?" he asked.

She bit her lip, her own tactical scenarios playing out in her head. "I think so," she said.

"Forget it," he said, noting every bit of hesitation on her part.

"No," she shook her head and grabbed his grenade belt. "I can do it."

"Shepard," he growled as her fingers began to tingle and glow.

"Too late. It's the only plan we have." She painstakingly modded his five grenades.

The three of them grabbed a grenade each. Shepard set the other two in her own belt for later use. On three, they tossed the grenades at the feet of the Brutes, giving away their presence. The grenades detonated and the Brutes froze in place, a blue glow surrounding them. Without hesitation, she jumped out of cover and ran past the frozen Brutes to throw a warp at the now screaming Banshee. Tali set her combat drone to distract the Banshee from charging at them and Shepard wore out her biotics throwing one warp after another. When the Banshee was still alive and she heard the Brutes coming out of their Stasis, she moved closer to Garrus, allowing him to grab another grenade from her belt to delay the Brutes further. She felt the strain tugging at her brain as her amp started to overheat. A cry escaped her lips as she threw her last warp. She tasted blood dripping from her nose as the Banshee's barrier finally fell. Tali unloaded on the Banshee as Garrus started in on the first Brute. Shepard managed a head shot to the Banshee with her pistol and cringed as the thing screamed one last time before falling. The deafening sound echoed inside her head, bouncing around like a ping pong ball clanging on cymbals. She turned slowly to help with the paralyzed Brutes. Garrus had done a number on the first one, it's head barely left after suffering several shots from his Widow. Tali reloaded her shotgun and started to wear down the second.

Shepard backed up and leaned on the wall. Her people had this. If she tried anything, she'd be useless. She watched Garrus and Tali effortlessly take down the Brute while she nursed her bloody nose. She chuckled, her head spinning. "Hey, Tali. Got any of those tissues hidden in your suit?"

The Quarian turned to her and cocked her head. "Oh, Shepard." She jogged toward her and pulled out a tissue, pressing it under Shepard's seeping nose.

Garrus was looking on in horror, probably having another heart attack. She apologized with her eyes as Tali stifled the bleeding. "Thanks," she mumbled around the tissue shoved up her nostril. She tipped her head back and smirked dropping her voice an octave as she addressed the panicking Turian. "Hey baby, you still find me sexy?" she blew on the tissue making it flutter and winked painfully.

After a moment of studying her, probably reading her vitals with his visor, he crossed his arms, raised his brow plates and cocked his hips. "I doubt there is a response that won't get me punished in some way or another, so I refuse to answer for Tali's sake."

"Don't hold back on my account," Tali said with teasing sarcasm.

He chuffed and walked off toward the elevator, nudging her on his way by. "We'll discuss your battle field sex appeal later when you're not bleeding."

"Ooh," she grinned, turning to follow him. "I wait with baited breath."

Tali shook her head and fell in line behind her as they gathered in the small elevator. Shepard took the ruined tissue from her nose and sniffing made her head throb, but there was no way she was meeting whoever awaited them in the tower with a bloody tissue stuck in her nose. A gunshot rang clear as they reached the top floor and Shepard pulled her pistol and made sure she was first out of the elevator. "Get Ready!"

She burst through the door to the control room and saw Miranda on the floor behind a desk. She looked pretty beat up. "Shepard," she whimpered, throwing Shepard's attention to a man on the opposite side of the room who had a gun and Oriana wrapped in his grasp. Shepard recognized him as Miranda's father.

"Commander Shepard, excellent timing," Lawson said, his accent thicker than Miranda's own. His gun rounded on her and she scowled as they showed down.

"Put the gun down," she said with exasperation.

"No. Oriana tried to shoot me. Miranda's poisonous influence, no doubt." he snarled.

"I'm sorry she missed," Shepard quipped. "Where's Kai Leng?"

"I don't know. Gone. He took my research and left us here to die," Lawson admitted.

"Miranda, can you hear me?" she asked having moved out of eye line.

She heard her friend grunt as she stood and moved to stand beside Shepard. "That's close enough. Both of you!" her father shouted. "Kai Leng didn't finish the job, but I will."

"This ends here," Shepard insisted.

"On the contrary. Now that the Reapers are taken care of, we have a way out." Lawson said with assurance.

"Let her go," Shepard threatened, her voice low.

"Shepard... don't let him take her," Miranda pleaded, her voice strained.

"Shepard, please," Oriana begged.

"I have no problem with you," Shepard stated, hoping to get Oriana from his clutches. "I just want Oriana and the research data."

"You want a lot," he said, his eyes narrowing.

"You get your life in return," she insisted. "How much is that worth?"

His gaze shifted between her and Miranda and Oriana. "All right, take her. But I want out alive. Deal?" he said, shoving Oriana to the floor, his gun still trained on Shepard.

He ignored Miranda as she began to glow blue, a fatal mistake. She grunted as she unleashed a heavy throw at him and knocked him through the cracked glass behind him. He fell down into the abyss of the tower with a shout. "No deal," Miranda said with breathless anger. She walked over to her sister and gave her a hand up. "Did he hurt you? Are you all right?" Her sister fell into her arms, sobbing quietly. "It's okay, Ori. You're safe now," Miranda soothed, petting her sister's hair.

"I'm fine," Oriana said softly. "I just... I want to get out of here."

"We will," Miranda assured her, holding her out to arm's length. "Give me a minute, okay?"

Oriana nodded and Miranda approached Shepard. "Commander Shepard. Fancy meeting you here," Miranda said with a smile as she took in Shepard's current state of disheveled.

"We caught a break. Are you alright?" Shepard asked her, noticing that Kai Leng had scratched her up a bit in their fight.

"I'll be fine, really..." Miranda assured her, reaching out to touch her finger to Shepard's side, coming back with blood. "You?"

She glanced back at Garrus. "Big Guy here will make sure I get to Chakwas in time," she quipped and Miranda chuckled.

"I don't know how you managed it, but I'm glad you're here," Miranda sighed, crossing her arms.

"How did you do all of this?" Shepard asked gesturing at Miranda and beyond.

"Finding my father didn't take long once I confirmed he worked for the Illusive Man." She shrugged. "Just had to follow the lies. Once I saw what this place really was, I couldn't just walk away."

"Of course," Shepard agreed, her lip curling upwards.

"Things got really complicated when Reapers showed up... And Kai Leng..." She touched the cut on her cheek, hissing like it stung. Shepard knew the bite of that particular sword, though her cut had been much deeper.

"You survived. Not many people could do that," Shepard said with a bitter smile, thinking she still owed Leng for Thane's life.

"When you mentioned he was involved, I took a few precautions. Probably saved my life," she shrugged.

"Miranda, this whole thing was a huge risk. You should have told me," she offered, knowing she would have helped had Miranda just asked.

"You have a war to win, Shepard. This was my fight. It's been a long time coming," she said with a glance at her sister.

"You did it... It's over," Shepard agreed with a smile.

"Yes, I just wish my sister didn't have to see all this," she admitted hanging her head.

"About your father..." Shepard began.

"I'm glad he's gone, Shepard. I'm sorry if that sounds cold," Miranda said, unable to look her in the face.

"No, I understand," Shepard admitted.

"It's finally over. For both of us," Miranda said with a sigh. When her eyes finally lifted, Shepard saw the beginnings of tears glistening at the corners. "We can stop running."

"Yes, you can," she agreed, gripping Miranda's shoulder in encouragement. After a brief exchange of smiles, Shepard dropped her hand and looked over at Tali and Garrus who were huddled around the computer, omnitools glowing as they salvaged data. "What's our status? Any intel we can use from this place?"

"Research data is gone, but we've got basic facility information. Shuttle arrivals and departures, Cerberus included," Tali said as Shepard approached them, limping heavily. "No direct links, but it's a start."

"Grab anything you can off the computer. We'll take it back to be analyzed," she ordered.

"I can do better than that," Miranda piped up. Shepard turned to her in surprise as Miranda grinned at her. She held a small data drive in her palm.

"What?" Shepard asked, moving back to Miranda.

"Before Kai Leng took off, I planted a tracer on him. If you act fast, you'll track him right to the Illusive Man," she said, patting the drive against her opposite hand before holding it out for Shepard to take.

"A tracer? Sounds like you thought of everything..." Shepard said, ready to kiss Miranda for the break she had just given them.

"Not quite, but... nobody's perfect," she quipped.

"Thanks Miranda. This is... exactly what we need," Shepard said almost swaying on her feet as her exhaustion and relief mixed in her veins.

"Thought you might need some good news."

"Damn right," she chuckled. "What's next for you two?"

"Get her someplace safe... Get this scratch cleaned up..."

"Okay. I've got to follow all of this up," Shepard sighed.

"I'll be in touch, Shepard. Soon..." Miranda promised. "Come on, Ori. We've had enough of father's hospitality."

"Let's make sure everybody knows about this place," Shepard limped to a nearby console and pulled up the programs that were blocking the communications then spliced Miranda's warning on a loop so anyone who arrived would hear and know to stay away.

Garrus moved up behind her while Tali called in their shuttle. "Come on, Shepard. Let's get you patched up," he rumbled softly. She turned and leaned her weight into him, her leg almost giving out on her. "I've got you," he promised.

* * *

 

It took Miranda's tracer days to track Kai Leng and in the meantime, Shepard decided that it was in her crew's best interests to get everyone back to the Citadel to have that party Joker had already invited several people to. The final guest list included everyone she knew who had ever served with her on the Normandy. She wanted everyone together, because she had a sickening feeling that this might be the last time she would see all of them together.

The evening started off calmly enough, everyone getting to know each other if they hadn't met already, but as the drinks started flowing, the conversations got racier and the manners sloppier. Zaeed hit on most of the women present, Samara found one of Shepard's gardens and meditated. She found Kasumi under her tactical cloak sifting through Shepard's underwear drawer, Jack and Miranda had a word battle that didn't end in either of them threatening the other, Liara drunkenly lifted James with her biotics after he lost the argument over which was superior, biotics or physical prowess. Wrex, Zaeed, and Javik set up a shooting range in her TV room, EDI convinced Joker to dance with her after Shepard stepped in and offered to dance with her instead, making Joker laugh uproariously for five straight minutes. Grunt made himself the bouncer until he was so drunk that Shepard found him sitting in the shower in the upstairs guest room with the water running, talking to himself about Salarians and their 'wiggly arms'. Everyone else made the most of all of her space and the apartment wide speaker system to dance and mingle.

It was a night to remember and Shepard was glad that Joker had suggested it. The morning after, Shepard opened her eyes and the room was far too bright. She was snuggled up next to Garrus and she smiled, closing her eyes again. "Ugh, what a night... but look who's here."

"Hmm, yeah... I hung out a lot of places last night," he said shifting his weight so he was lying on his side, facing her. His hand slid up the back of her thigh, over her rear and rested gently on her side. She opened her eyes back up to regard him. "Your upper body, your lower body... pretty much all the parts in between..." He leaned over her and kissed her softly.

"Turians certainly don't lack for a sense of direction," she quipped, her voice low so she didn't hurt her own throbbing headache, let alone whether he had one.

"And you don't lack for places to get lost," he said jokingly as he grudgingly pulled his hand away and sat up with his legs over the side of the bed so she got a good look at his back.

"Let's see if anyone else is up," she sighed, dragging herself out of the bed.

He grabbed her hand as she passed by him, looking for where her pants had gone. "How is your leg healing up?"

She twisted her hip outward to show him the partially healed gash. Amazingly enough, they hadn't popped any of her stitches the night before. She didn't fully remember the 'how' of their escapades, only that she was wearing only a t shirt and he was completely naked. There was also the dull, happy ache she always got after a long night with him. "No harm done," she promised as he pressed his lips just to the inside of the wound a little higher than necessary. Her insides clenched as his mandibles fluttered gently over her skin.

"Good," he mumbled, his voice pressing the last of her buttons.

She ran her hands over his fringe and he purred, his face still places where the vibration could make her shiver. "Dammit," she whispered when he pulled away and grinned teasingly at her, knowing exactly what he had done.

"You can save that for later," he said, his own voice strained. "I think we both need an aspirin and a good breakfast."

She grudgingly agreed as her pants appeared out of nowhere in his talons. She snatched them from him, biting her bottom lip as she tried to calm her racing heart. "Bastard," she grumbled.

"Oh, don't be cruel," he teased, slipping his own shirt on.

"Me? Look what you just did," she accused. "Talk about cruel." She shoved her pants on, giving up on finding her underwear.

"I promise, I'll make it up to you later," he said standing to knuckle her chin and pull his own pants on.

"I intend on collecting on that very soon," she hummed, stepping closer to him and stealing a short kiss.

She opened her bathroom door and jumped back, startled by the passed out Prothean in the middle of the floor. Her short scream woke Javik and he sat up looking around then groaned. "Is it time to rule the galaxy now? Kneel before Javik... I... I had a dream... fifty thousand years had passed... It was horrible... I was alone... The primitives had evolved. They ruled the galaxy. Salarians, Turians and the... Asari." he rubbed his face, his four eyes blinking slowly. "There was one... 'Liara'. She had these eyes. And that voice. And she was... blue. No, no... It was just a dream." He stopped talking and sniffed deeply. "I smell Primitives." He sighed deeply. "It was no dream." Shepard backed out and closed the door behind her, saving her chuckle for after Garrus cocked his head in amusement.

Outside the bedroom, Samara was still where she had left her, meditating in the small garden. Tali was curled up, her knees tucked up to her chin, rocking as she moaned on the guest room bed. Kasumi made a speedy exit, claiming she was lactose intolerant and had not known you could get real milk on the Citadel. Liara was sitting casually on one of the couches upstairs.

Shepard padded downstairs and found a group of people gathered around the coffee pot and James in the middle of it all making eggs. Jack and Jacob were in the workout room, Jack doing pull ups and Jacob sit ups. She left there quickly, feeling like a slacker. EDI stood by the picture windows. She offered Shepard a smile and said, "Some neighbors came by last night to complain about the noise. I put their bodies in the building's incinerator." As Shepard's hungover brain took a moment to process what she had said, EDI turned away and said, "That was a joke... I have nothing else to report. I recommend breakfast."

Just then Zaeed approached her with a plate with three strips of bacon on it. "You're out of bacon. I saved you some... In return for all of the times you saved mine." She accepted the plate gratefully and headed to check on her TV room. Joker was sitting on one of the bar stools, his head buried in his arms and Wrex was on the couch looking at the TV. Shepard gaped at something she hadn't remembered happening. The screen was displaying a photograph of everyone gathered on and around the living room sofa. Across the front, sitting together from left to right was Traynor, Garrus, herself, EDI and Joker. She and Garrus were cuddled together and EDI and Joker were holding hands, smiling at each other instead of the camera. Standing on either end of the couch was Jack and Kasumi. Clustered behind the couch was Tali, Miranda, Steve, Jacob, Kaidan and Samara. The back row was Grunt, Liara, James, Zaeed, Javik and Wrex.

"It's a good picture," Wrex mused when he saw her looking at it. "I think I'll hang a copy in the Nursery."

She glanced sideways at him, taking a bite of her bacon. "Nursery?" she asked.

He grinned widely. "Bakara is already pregnant. She keeps insisting we name the first one Mordin."

"Congratulations," she said patting his shoulder. That was two of her friends now that were going to be parents. Jacob had informed her that Brynn was also pregnant. It was another reason to fight to destroy the Reapers once and for all. They all deserved their happiness.

She suddenly felt queasy, her worries from the night before returning full force. She handed Wrex the remaining bacon on the plate and jostled Joker's bar stool on her rush to escape. She left the apartment, not really having a plan on where she was going, but when she reached the terminal where she could hail a cab, she paused. Moments later, Joker appeared at her side. His voice was hesitant as if he knew she needed a friend right now. "Duty calls, huh?"

"There is still a war on," she sighed, turning to regard him with a plastered on smile.

"Unless the Reapers are on shore leave, too?" he smirked.

She chuckled softly. "I'm guessing they're not. Round everyone up, pass out the aspirin and have them report to the Normandy."

"You got it," he said, much more enthusiastically than she knew he felt. After he disappeared, she called her cab and went back to wait by the docks.

She leaned on the rail over looking the Normandy where she hovered, held up by the docking clamps. The day cycle was just beginning and the 'sun' was rising behind the ship. It was a beautiful sight. It was quiet in the early morning, her only company a Keeper who worked at a panel a few feet away. The Normandy crew joined her shortly, Joker leaning on her left and Garrus by her right. "So... I guess it's back to the fight," Garrus said softly.

"At least we threw one hell of a party," she said, unable to meet his gaze. "Probably the last one."

"That doesn't sound like my girl," he chided. "You'll find a way to win. And when this is over, I'll be waiting for you." When she responded with nothing more than a half smile, he glanced out at the Normandy and continued. "Best times of my life were spent on that ship. Been a damn good ride."

"The best," she agreed, his words helping to push away some of the darkness swirling around her. She noticed everyone else had already gone into the airlock and he sauntered off behind them. With one last glance at the sunrise, she jogged off to join them.

* * *

 

Miranda's tracer led them to the Horsehead Nebula. As soon as they figured out the Nebula, Shepard knew the system he was in. The star he'd had behind him every time they'd spoken was a dead giveaway. Anadius. They were going there for two things. One, to cut the head off the snake (or the three headed dog in this case) and two, to get the Prothean VI back and complete the Crucible.

Shepard could feel it. The quickening. This was the beginning of the end. Everything she had done had lead to this. It brought a feeling of dread. What would be the cost of the Crucible? Hackett informed her that all preparations were made. The device was ready, save for the Catalyst, whatever it might be. She paced her cabin a week after Sanctuary. They were a days' flight from Chronos Station. She had checked and rechecked everything. Traynor assured her that they were as prepared as they could get and she'd done her rounds, talked to her people and now she had nothing to do. That made her uneasy. She scratched her leg where the scar from her wound was healing nicely but itched her like crazy.

Her attention was called to the entry way where Garrus was watching her pace. "Shepard," he purred approaching her. "Thought you might be up here... You know what the best part is about a battle that decides the whole fate of the galaxy?" She flopped down on the edge of her bed and he sat casually beside her, brushing a slew of data pads out of his way.

"Winning it?" she asked with a smirk.

"I was thinking it was a good excuse to remind the ones you care about that... that well, you care about them..." he took her hand in his. "Want some company?"

"You read my mind," she sighed, thinking she definitely need his touch to calm her nerves.

"Guess I'm getting pretty good at this... But, some more practice wouldn't hurt," he smirked. He leaned in close and she met him in the middle, her lips pressing against his urgently. Her free hand found his mandible and she stroked up his cheek to grip just below his fringe. She moved to climb on top of him like she always did when they made out, but he pushed her back with a chuckle. She broke the kiss, pulling back and frowning at his behavior. "I thought we might try something new this time," he said with a devious grin.

"New?" she arched a brow, wondering what exactly he thought they might try that they hadn't already done. There were only so many ways their body types fit together.

"New," he confirmed with a smirk. "I've noticed you carrying around a _lot_ of tension." He reached out and slid his hand across her back then gripped both her shoulders and started to massage gently. "I plan on making sure I can... undo all of those clenched muscles." He leaned in close to her back, talking in her ear, his face beside hers. She closed her eyes and leaned into his touch, her body singing for release. His tongue snaked out and licked over the tender spot behind and below her ear. She gasped as he marked his spot then gently nipped at her with his lips. He pulled away briefly to brush all of her data pads to the floor and gently push her onto her back. She scooted up to the top of the bed and he followed, one knee beside her hip and the other between her legs. Propped on one elbow, he leaned in and kissed her lips, slowly undoing the zipper on her hoodie then slipping his hand up under her t shirt to play over her bra. She reached up to play in his fringe and he took her hand with a shake of his head. "Relax," he hummed.

He took his time, working her out of her clothes and leaving her lying beneath him hot and bothered from the attention to detail he was paying, his own clothes disappearing in the process. Her skin practically buzzed wherever he touched, a light brush of his talon over her stomach pulling a soft moan from her lips. After hearing that, he slid his palm down past her groin to her thigh where he gripped her leg and pushed it apart from the other. He played carefully outside her, his fingers just shy of penetration. He stifled her soft 'please' with a kiss that began at her lips and continued down her chin, pausing at that place on her neck where he nipped again, then moved downwards over each breast, teasing her nipples hard and then his mandibles fluttering over her stomach lightly, raising goosebumps on her skin.

She felt the bed shift below her and she was so preoccupied with his ministrations she hardly saw it coming when he grabbed hold of her thighs, his arms tucked below them and tugged her roughly toward the bottom of the bed where he had positioned himself on his knees. Her startled yelp drew a pained grunt from his chest and he looked down at her with mischief. His hands gripped her tightly, massaging her thighs and his eyes roved over her from head to toe. After drinking her in as she bit her lower lip he hummed and started kissing at her knee and continued down until he was looking up at her with those intense blue eyes, his visor long abandoned on her nightstand. He breathed lightly, throwing her nerves into over drive before taking his long Turian tongue and flicking it over her clitoris then plunging it inside her. "God," she moaned as he expertly worked her. His subharmonics hummed, adding to the sensation from his throat and she bucked, forcing him to release one of her thighs and slide a hand up over her stomach to gently but firmly keep her where he wanted her, pushing down with his strong arms. It was like he knew every spot she had, using his tongue and the vibrations of his voice to slowly bring her to a very satisfied climax.

He gave her a moment after pulling out his tongue to let her muscles relax before flipping her over. She knew what he wanted and she shakily moved to her knees, only needing to support her own weight for a split second before he grabbed her hips and slid inside. After the foreplay he had performed on her, she thought he would take more time for him to finish, but it was over within minutes. When he came with a satisfied grunt, his warmth enveloping her, she sighed happily. "Spirits, Shepard."

She smiled and he removed his hands from her hips, letting her know it was safe to move. She slowly slipped away from him and flopped down on the mattress with an exhausted grunt. "That was..." she moaned and rolled over, her skin still singing with afterglow as she glanced up at the self satisfied Turian. She stretched like a cat coming out of a nap and he joined her on the bed, kissing her shoulder and pulling her against his warm chest.

"That _really_ worked for me," he agreed.

"Where did you learn that?" she sighed, her body melting against his.

"You," he shrugged. "I've explored a _lot_ of you and I've learned _exactly_ what you like and where you like it."

"Well, kudos, Big Guy," she purred, caressing her finger tips over his face, tracing his clan marks like she had the first time when she'd asked to touch them all those years ago. She lifted her leg, the limb still a bit shaky and wrapped it around his hip, snuggling closer to him. "You have perfected the art of oral sex and probably spoiled me for life."

He chuckled. "I'm glad I could be of service.... You taste..." he hummed, then pressed his forehead to hers. She felt herself slipping in the euphoria and the next words she heard were a gentle. "You should get some sleep." He lifted her limp hand from his face where it had rested when she began to doze and he kissed her fingers. She fell asleep with their foreheads together and their hands clasped between them.

* * *

 

_The shadows in the forest were thicker, the trees more difficult to make out in the dense fog. The whispers of the dead chased her as she fled in slow motion, looking for the little boy._

_"Shepard Commander, help us..."_

_"You know it's the right choice LT!"_

_"Kalahira guide you, Siha..."_

_"Shepard, perfect timing... Good to.... have you here!"_

_Her breath came in short terrified whimpers as she chased the white streak of the boy's hoodie, the walls of the dead closing in around her. The boy ran into the shadows and she followed, her skin going clammy as she glanced around hunting for the light in all the darkness. When she spotted the boy, he was running to a kneeling figure. He fell into her arms and she hugged him tightly... protectively. When he pulled away, she kept an arm around his waist still kneeling as he turned to look at Shepard. They both regarded her as her heart stopped, the motherly figure staring up at her, a twisted grin on her face. She was staring at herself. Before she could wrap her head around what it could mean, both the boy and herself burst into flames. The lick of the fire on her skin almost felt real and she jumped back, watching the two as their skin burned so hot it melted off their faces that still grinned maniacally at her._

* * *

 

She shot up, her breath ragged as the feeling of the flames faded. She gasped and swallowed her terror. As she regained her senses, she noticed she had been covered with a blanket and Garrus was sitting in her lounge chair at the foot of her bed, pouring over some of the data pads, his feet propped on the coffee table. When he heard her wake in such a state, his head spun and he dropped his feet to the floor. When he saw she was okay, he sighed and stood to come sit beside her on the edge of the bed. Her hands were still shaking as she leaned over the edge of the bed, her elbows on her knees. "Bad dream?" he asked, softly.

"Do you ever get them?" she asked, forcing herself to sit up and meet his eyes.

He studied her astutely. "Hmm... I tend to expect the worst anyway, so dreaming about it is just a waste of good sleep."

"What about now?" her voice was shaky.

He shrugged. "I'm expecting a tough fight. What's bothering you?"

"Can we ever be ready for a battle like this? Everything we've ever known..." she sighed and dropped her eyes. "It's all hanging by a thread, Garrus."

"Yeah, but the truth is, when hasn't it?" He traced a finger over the fresh scar on her cheek and then moved to the one on her thigh. "Every fight we've ever seen could have been our last. Every bullet we've ever dodged could have been _the one_..."

She chuckled taking his hand. "There _have_ been a lot of bullets..."

"And this time around, they're just a little bit bigger," he pointed out.

She smiled widely then touched his face, her palm resting on his mandible as her thumb caressed his cheek. "I don't know what I'd do without you," she admitted. He reached up and took her hand from his face so he could smile. Before he could answer her sentiment, she stood up, feeling the need to do something productive in their last hours before Chronos Station. His hand lingered in hers as she stepped away from the bed and gathered up something to wear. "I'm going to get cleaned up then hover menacingly over Joker as he brings us in to meet the fleet."

He chuckled. "I think I'll go check on the main gun. I slacked a little in my calibrating last night."

She gasped. "Garrus Vakarian slacked off on calibrations? I'm shocked!" she chuckled and leaned in to give him one last kiss before heading to the shower. "I'll see you at the shuttle."

* * *

 

Shepard watched from the war room as the Normandy hovered out of the fray, their stealth drive online, as the Alliance strike teams softened up Cerberus' defenses for them. Her attention was drawn away from the war table when she heard EDI address her. The AI stood at the entry of the war room, her hips cocked, but looking sheepish. "I should accompany you on this mission."

Shepard frowned, "Why?"

"This is the central point of operations for Cerberus. It will have enhanced security measures." EDI approached her, languidly making her way down the stairs to stand beside Shepard. "With my knowledge of Cerberus algorithms and this body's updated protocols, I offer the best chance to help you succeed."

EDI was right. Shepard had no idea what the Illusive Man might throw at her, but EDI had the quick reflexes to counteract mostly anything that got in their way. She nodded shortly. "Grab your gear." Shepard headed toward the exit to do the same. It was time to end Cerberus.

Once decked out in all of her armor and weapons, she headed back to the bridge to get a handle on their situation. EDI was standing in all of her gear, beside Joker's chair, her arms folded with that far off look on her face when she was computing. "Joker, what's our status?" Shepard asked, stopping behind his seat.

"We've got a foothold, but it's not much, Commander. Lot's of fighters guarding the launch bays," he said adjusting his seating.

"Can you get us in?" she asked, not doubting him for a second.

"Hey, I got us to Ilos. I can do this," he said flippantly. Then a grin slipped over his face. "Might be a bumpy ride though."

"Do what you can," she smirked, every bit of faith in his abilities.

"Shepard, I am ready," EDI said, her gaze focusing as she turned toward her Commander.

"Wait... What?" Joker shouted, turning in his seat. "Are you crazy? You can't go to Cerberus headquarters! They could have a virus or a kill-switch, or..."

EDI cut him off with a smile and a gentle hand on his shoulder. "I will be fine, Jeff."

"Head to the shuttle, EDI," Shepard said softly. As the AI nodded and left, Shepard stepped up beside Joker's seat where he looked absolutely livid.

"Fifth fleet's cut through their line. They're regrouping. Now's as good a time as any," he said shortly.

"I know it hurts... not being able to go with her," she offered.

He snorted. "Yeah, it sucks. Thanks for bringing it up," he snapped. She sighed and turned to leave. She was halfway to the doorway when he called after her. "Hey... Shepard? Keep her safe."

"Same to you," she replied with a grin, referring to the Normandy part of EDI.

She quickly made her way to the shuttle bay to meet up with Garrus, EDI and Steve. They piled into the Kodiak and with a glance from Steve, she took the copilot's seat and they launched into the fray. They slipped in and out of the battle all around them, dodging fire and aiming for the open fighter bay toward the rear of the station. Once the shuttle slipped in, they were hit by a force-field that smacked into their shields as they flew through it. The Kodiak dropped like lead and skidded to a halt, running over a few Cerberus troops as it came to a stop. Shepard jumped up out of her seat and she Garrus and EDI opened the hatch and joined the fray. She took cover at the rear of the shuttle and called back in to Steve. "Everything okay, Cortez?"

"I'm fine. I've got repairs to make here. Give Cerberus hell!"

As she took his advice, they got separated in the large hangar. She charged into a group of Cerberus troops and right in the line of the launcher. "Heads up, Shepard!" Garrus warned as Cerberus prepared to launch a fighter. She punched the engineer beside her and rolled out of the fighter's path before it streaked past her, blowing her hair forward and taking the unlucky engineer on a joyride into space. She avoided watching him float away, still not completely over her anxiety of seeing someone dying in the vacuum like she had. About ten minutes of fighting later, she heard Garrus again over her comm. He was too far away to hear his voice in person. "Hell, they're bringing in mechs!"

"Regroup!" she shouted, getting her people back together so they could take out the Atlas that was slowly making it's way out of storage and into the hanger.

While they fought it, all three of them having an overload working wonderfully to take down it's shields so they could pepper it with bullets in it's heavy metal plating, she heard an announcement over the speakers. Cerberus troops began scurrying away and she narrowed her eyes to listen closely to the announcement. "Security breach in hangar 16. Initiating Achilles Protocol," a feminine computer voice announced.

"Shepard, Cerberus intends to vent the hangar bay!" EDI translated.

"Shit," she cursed and unleashed a heavy warp to finish off the Atlas. "Ideas?"

"I need an active console. Try the upper level," EDI suggested.

"Can do," Shepard smirked and targeted a sniper that had been trying to take her and Garrus out for going on four minutes. She mock saluted Garrus as her biotics wreathed her in blue and then charged up to the sniper. The impact bent his rifle and knocked him backwards. She used her omniblade to stab him before he could even get up.

"Show off," he grumbled as he climbed the ladder nearby to join her, EDI right behind him.

She blew him a kiss and moved to the control center nearby. "EDI, I've got a console, go!"

The AI stepped up to the indicated interface and began typing rapidly. "Hangar vent procedure... disabled." EDI then proceeded to hack into the fighter launch controls, one of the fighters lifting up out of the ground, ready for launch.

Shepard suddenly had an idea and she grinned in amusement. "There's that look," Garrus pointed out. "I hate that look."

"You're going to like it this time, Big Guy," she promised as she jogged off toward the hallway that would lead them around to the other side of the hangar. She nonchalantly grabbed a few stragglers with her biotics as they passed, and threw them down into the hangar below. Directly across the hangar from the console EDI had used to activate the fighter, Shepard found the console she had been looking for. She pulled up her omnitool and interfaced with the console, her grin spreading as her hacking abilities were put to the test. She chewed her lip as she worked, Garrus hovering over her shoulder and chuckling as he figured out what she was doing.

"You're a genius," he mumbled as a red alert signal flashed over the screen and the fighter turned on it's track.

"Launch controls?" Shepard asked, looking to EDI for direction.

"Back on the lower level, Shepard."

They headed down and EDI found the controls and launched the fighter. It shot off it's track and directly into the station, ripping a path for them to follow toward the highly secured central station. After the fighter was gone and the station was burning in it's wake, Garrus stood up to survey the damage. "Impressive!"

She grinned at the praise as EDI warned them of reinforcements incoming. An Atlas climbed around the destroyed wall and into the hangar to send a rocket in their direction. Shepard grabbed Garrus and pulled him back down to kneel beside her as the rocket hit a wall behind them zipping inches from his head as he ducked. "Son of a bitch!" she cursed, pulling him to be sure the rocket had missed him completely. He looked unharmed. "I think I know what those heart attacks of yours feel like, now," she chuckled, brushing a bit of debris off his shoulder.

"The central lab was located behind this hangar," EDI said as she deployed a decoy from her omnitool to distract the Atlas for them. "I suggest we follow the fighter's path."

"Noted, let's move," Shepard agreed, charging her overload to work on the Atlas' shields as Garrus was already deploying his. The Atlas went down laughably easily and the few stragglers that remained went down to an incinerate.

They jogged across the hangar to where the fighter had ripped through the wall. EDI paused to work on the door with her Cerberus algorithms. "One moment. Cerberus has updated their encryption. There may be a slight delay while I bypass security."

"And if I hadn't brought you along?" She asked leadingly.

EDI glanced at her and smirked. "Cerberus would have vented the hangar."

"Thanks for coming," Shepard grinned patting EDI's armored shoulder.

"I am pleased to assist," EDI agreed. The door interface flashed green and then it slid open. "We must proceed through a sublevel to avoid Cerberus containment measures," EDI said as she led them to a shaft with a ladder heading down below.

"Where do you think we'll find the Prothean VI?" Shepard asked, trusting EDI's expertise.

"A central lab at the heart of this facility. It is the most secure area." She informed them tossing a thumb over her shoulder. "Following the destruction of the fighter will provide the most direct route."

They climbed down the ladder into the bowels of the station. The fires from the fighter made it much warmer in the confined space. "Now I know what a casserole feels like," Shepard grumbled, tugging on the collar of her under armor. She had immediately began to sweat when she dropped into the tunnels. They of course met resistance and Shepard cursed the seemingly endless Cerberus troops.

When they emerged from the tunnels on the opposite side of the base, the cooler air made Shepard feel much better. As EDI jogged ahead to hack the door as she had on the other, she pointed Shepard to an active console that had files on it that she might find interesting. "What am I looking at?" Shepard asked.

"Project Lazarus. Your resurrection," EDI informed her.

That piqued her interest. She activated the oldest entry on the console and a vid popped up that showed a conversation between the Illusive Man and a scientist dressed in Cerberus garb. The scientist began the conversation. "It can't be done. It's not a matter of resources."

"It's always a matter of resources," The Illusive Man insisted. "We're not losing Shepard."

"Sir, Shepard is clinically brain dead. After that much trauma, that long with no oxygen... We cannot overcome nature."

"Operative Lawson disagrees. She is now in charge of Project Lazarus."

Shepard stared at the screen as the video faded. "I didn't realize it was that bad," she whispered, hugging herself against the nausea welling up in her gut.

"Pretty stark. You okay?" She felt Garrus hovering just a little bit closer to her.

"I'm still me. I doubt I'd have been able to turn against Cerberus otherwise... I don't remember anything. Maybe they really just fixed me, or maybe I'm just a high-tech VI that thinks it's Commander Shepard..." She sighed. "But I don't know. I..."

"You're real," Garrus said immediately. "A little crazy, maybe, but real."

She sighed again and played the second vid. The scientist began again. "Tissue regeneration is proceeding. The helmet kept the brain intact... for whatever good that will do."

"Lawson will find a way," The Illusive Man said with a note of what sounded like pride.

"Sir, Shepard's an Alliance soldier. As far as she knows, we're a terrorist organization."

"I'm not looking for a dance partner. We need Shepard and Shepard needs resources. She'll work with us."

The video cut out and Garrus growled. "He really had you boxed in."

"Every instinct I had told me not to trust Cerberus. But I needed their help, so I played along." She responded with her own growl of anger.

"You did what you had to, Shepard, and I was there with you," he said, making her feel a bit better.

The third vid had another scientist beside the first. The first spoke, "Project Lazarus is reporting neurological activity. They're requesting more funding."

"Granted," The Illusive Man said. "Get me our potential recruits file. Shepard will be up soon. We need a crew."

"Our existing forces should be more than sufficient..." the female scientist said haughtily.

"No," the Illusive Man said. "We need sympathetic faces. I need Shepard invested. Tap Kelly Chambers and recruit Donnely. I imagine Miss Daniels will follow. We'll want some old friends as well. Contact Dr. Chakwas and send me the psych profile on Shepard's pilot... along with a bottle of '47 Thessia Red."

"Sneaky little bastard," Garrus grumbled as the console shut down. "Used them to keep you from seeing the real Cerberus."

"How's that door coming EDI?" Shepard asked, both glad to know the truth and shaken up as well.

"We are clear to proceed," EDI announced.

As they passed through the door, Hackett's voice sounded over her comm. "Incursion team, what's your status?"

"We've cleared the hangar and are inside the base," Shepard relayed as they headed down a short hallway back toward the fighter's path.

"Good work. Do you need support?"

"Negative. Keep the heat on. We'll find what we need," she insisted. They'd fought through worse. They could handle the Cerberus shock troops.

After another sweltering fight through the bowels full of turrets and troops, EDI jogged to the next security door, directing Shepard to another console. Gearing up for another heart wrenching slew of facts about her, she was surprised to see a different scientist. He spoke to the Illusive Man however so she listened. "Here's what we recovered. Smart enough to signal for help, but it won't be talking philosophy any time soon."

"You'd be surprised, Doctor," the Illusive Man almost chuckled. "Once we combine it with the pieces we recovered from the Citadel..."

"I'm still concerned about that. This 'rogue VI' wiped out every soldier on Luna. Combining it with Reaper tech... well..."

"That's what the shackles are for. The Enhanced Defense Intelligence will be completely under control."

Shepard glanced over at EDI in shock. "You were that rogue VI on Luna?"

"Yes," EDI answered.

"Guess we didn't exactly get off on the right foot," Shepard flinched, remembering the scream of the computer as she'd fried it's circuits with a overload.

"It was difficult. Gaining awareness while under attack was... confusing," EDI said, cringing at her own memory of the incident. "I am pleased that my relationship with organics has become more cooperative."

The video continued as she hit the second entry. "Our sims indicate that the Enhanced Defense Intelligence gives the highest combat improvement on frigates. Anything heavier and the ships react too slowly to benefit from EDI's advice," the scientist said.

"EDI?" The Illusive Man questioned the man.

"Oh, that's, uh... well the boys in the lab came up with the name for her."

"For _it..._ Good work. I'll take your recommendations on planned installation."

"Sir, she... _it_ can be very persuasive. If it were to turn a crewman, convince them to disable the shackles, well..."

"It's a cyberwarfare suite, Doctor. Nothing more," the Illusive Man insisted.

"Shows what he knew," Shepard said with a snort as the entry concluded.

"It is unlikely that anyone without Jeff's extreme emotional attachment to his ship would have been willing to unshackle me..." EDI said with a smile.

"I don't know," Shepard smirked. "With that voice?"

Shepard played the last entry to see what else she could find out about EDI. "What about the backups?" The Illusive Man asked angrily.

"I'm sorry, sir. None of Normandy's surveillance feeds have been responding since Shepard went rogue."

"I want it back!" The Illusive Man was livid and his struggle made her grin widely. "Retry the remote lock-down protocols."

"After our last attempt, EDI flooded our server with seven zettabytes of explicit images. I think she was making a joke."

" _It_ doesn't make jokes, Doctor." the Illusive Man growled. "Allocate a team for a new project. Codename... Eva. This time, we'll ensure it stays loyal."

"You never told me about Cerberus trying to shut down the Normandy," Shepard said, surprised that EDI had chosen them over her creators.

"You had more pressing issues. The situation was under control," she said with a shrug.

Shepard smirked. "Seven zettabytes?"

"Most of it was Jeff's. That was..."

"A joke. I know... and thank you," Shepard smiled, patting EDI's shoulder.

"Incursion team, are you still with us?" Hackett asked over the comms. "We're limiting fire as best we can."

EDI finished with the door and they passed through, heading back toward the fighter path again. "Admiral, we're in deep, and the Prothean VI will be in the safest part of the station. Don't hold back." Shepard insisted.

"This isn't Elysium, Shepard. I don't need a hero." Hackett said, a hint of worry in his voice. Worry for her. She was touched, but there were more important things happening.

"I'll be fine," she said. "Just take Cerberus down... Please." Even she hated the desperate tone in her voice. Cerberus had violated her on the deepest level possible. She wanted the Illusive Man to pay for his manipulations.

"Understood, Commander," Hackett said with a sigh. "All ships. You are free to fire."

Minutes later, as they were crossing a hallway, the station shook beneath their feet and they heard explosions from the outer reaches. "That'd be a generator," Garrus identified the explosion. "Looks like the fifth fleet's coming through."

"They'll get it done," she agreed.

They dropped down into another area that opened into a large room full of catwalks surrounding something Shepard had hoped to never see again. She grimaced at the sight. "Looks like the human proto-Reaper we killed," Garrus hummed as he gazed up at the thing dangling from the ceiling.

"What's left of it. I'm surprised Cerberus recovered that much from the base," Shepard mused, averting her eyes from the mangled mess of parts that no longer resembled a human.

"All those colonists kidnapped, processed into that... and Cerberus hangs it up like a trophy," Garrus growled.

"The Illusive Man convinced me to work with him to save the colonies, but he never really cared, did he?" she mused more to herself than to the others, but her voice was heard.

"I think he did," Garrus said. "He just cares more about studying it. The dead are only a statistic now. Somehow, that seems even worse."

She took one last glance at the proto-Reaper before pushing ahead up the catwalks to go around it. While on the catwalks, they were attacked by (by Shepard's count) three Phantoms. Her skin prickled as she tried to keep her back to the railing so they couldn't get behind her. Her visor let her see a little better, but it wasn't fast enough to keep up with their quick movements. Whenever she felt cornered, she unleashed a Nova to knock anything back that might have gotten too close. Then she threw a shockwave and knocked the rest of the attackers from the catwalks. She panted, her heart racing with adrenaline when one of Garrus' bullets whizzed past her face and planted itself in the neck of one of the Phantoms. "Was that the last one?" she asked, rubbing sweat from her brow. She had managed not to get sliced to pieces this time and she considered that a step in the right direction.

"Just like Cerberus to bring a knife to a gun fight," Garrus quipped.

"I believe so," EDI agreed, sashaying up to join her and Garrus.

"Good, let's push ahead, but keep your eyes peeled," she ordered. There was no way she was going to let anyone sneak up on her anymore. They were too close.

As they climbed to the top level, Garrus' subharmonics were humming with unease. He was as uncomfortable with the narrow space and the presence of the dead dangling Reaper baby. "I thought hospitals were ugly to fight through. This is so much worse."

"Least it's not trying to kill us this time," she agreed. She was never more excited to leave a room as she was when they passed through the door out of the trophy room. She let out an audible sigh and followed the next path around to a hallway that inclined upwards. Her radar told her they were reaching their destination. "This is it," she said as they came to the final door. "Stay sharp everyone."

The doorway opened and they stepped into a large open room lined all the way around with windows. They could see everything happening outside as they crossed to the small collection of vid screens and consoles preceded by a single chair in the middle of the mirrored floor of the room. The bright star that served as Anadius' sun blazed outside, filling the window with it's presence. She stepped over a rounded incline in the floor in front of the chair and it felt surreal to actually be there instead of on the Normandy as a holo-image. She sighed, realizing that the Illusive Man must have fled. Somehow, it didn't matter. She had taken everything from him.

She moved from the projection dais and turned his chair to face the console. Sitting, she started tapping away at the interface. "We need to locate the Prothean VI."

EDI walked over to another console and interfaced with it while Garrus watched their backs. As she worked, a humming sounded behind her. "Shepard. You're in my chair."

She stood and spun, pointing her gun. When she saw he was standing as a holo-image on the dais, she smirked. "This chair is about the only damn thing you have left. Cerberus is finished."

"On the contrary. We have achieved everything I ever imagined... Almost everything," he amended.

"Yeah, we all saw what you accomplished on Sanctuary," she accused, holstering her pistol. "But it's not the same as controlling a Reaper."

"A significant hurdle," he said, unphased. "But thanks to the Prothean VI, I have what I need to make it a reality."

"The Catalyst," she guessed.

"Yes," he hissed.

"What is the Catalyst?" she asked nonchalantly, hoping he might just tell her instead of ranting about controlling Reapers some more. "And how exactly will it help you control the Reapers?"

"You'll have to ask the VI yourself. I'm done helping you."

She snorted. "When did you start?"

"You think because I'm willing to use the enemy's tactics that they're no longer my enemy? Everything, Shepard. Everything I've done has uplifted humanity." She sighed, feeling another monologue coming on as he continued. "Not only above other species in our galaxy, but over the Reapers!"

"If you're willing to do whatever it takes, then hand over the Catalyst. With the Crucible, we can end this," she pushed.

"It's not that simple..." he insisted.

"It _is_... It's _that_ simple. We're fighting each other while the Reapers occupy Earth. It's time to stop!"

"Your idealism is... admirable, Shepard. But in the end, our goals are simply too disparate. I believe destroying the Reapers would be the worst mistake we could ever make."

"Even with Cerberus in ruins, you still think you can do this your way," she said sadly. It was a shame that such a brilliant man was such a fool.

"I'd expect you to say that. You never really believed in us. Cerberus isn't just an organization or the people behind it. Cerberus is an idea." he took a long drag off the cigarette he had been brandishing at her while he talked with his hands. "That idea is not so easily destroyed. Besides. I've already acquired what you're looking for."

"EDI?" she asked turning her attention away from him to the AI who had been incessantly pecking away at her console while they talked.

"I've almost got it."

"EDI," he chided. "I'm surprised at you, working so hard to bring about the Reaper's destruction."

"Don't listen to him," Shepard warned, even as EDI stared unerringly at the screen, her calculating distant eyes still focused on the task at hand.

"You could have destroyed Eva's body," the Illusive Man continued. "But instead, you chose to _control_ it."

"It was necessary," EDI said simply.

"My point exactly," he smirked.

"I've got it," EDI said triumphantly as the VI appeared near the center console.

"Online, security breach detected," the Prothean said.

"Enjoy your little chat, but don't overstay your welcome," the Illusive Man warned before disappearing.

"You are attempting to recover me from indoctrinated forces?" the VI guessed, recognizing them.

"Yes! I need to know what the Catalyst is," she demanded.

"Security protocols have been overridden. I will comply. The Catalyst enhances dark energy transmissions and coordinates the entire mass relay network. In your cycle, it is known as the Citadel."

"What?!" Shepard gasped. It had been under their noses the whole damn time.

"The Catalyst is the Citadel," the VI repeated.

"Why couldn't you tell me this before?" she asked in dismay. If only the truth had been revealed on Thessia.

"It was feared that if the Reapers were aware of the Catalyst's intended use, they would retake control of it. I am programmed to withhold that information until the Crucible is complete."

"It's as ready as it's gonna be," she spun, ready to leave. "let's get it to the Citadel."

"That may no longer be possible," the VI stated.

"Why not?" she asked, stopping dead in her tracks.

"The one who broke through my security protocols, the one you call the Illusive Man, has fled to the Citadel and informed the Reapers of our purposes."

"Damn it!" she could have punched something if there had been anything near by.

"Then the Citadel is in danger!" EDI said with a note of panic. "The Reapers will take control of it."

"They already have," the VI announced. "The Citadel has been moved to the Reaper controlled space."

"Moved? To where?" she pleaded, hoping it had the answer. There were several systems controlled by the Reapers. It could be anywhere.

"To the system you refer to as Sol."

"Earth..."

"Correct. The Reaper forces will now consolidate power around the Catalyst and protect it at all costs. The odds of accessing it are remote."

"Don't count us out yet," she said to the ancient technology. What did it know? "We've come this far, and we'll finish this."

"I hope you find success," the VI said with a bow of it's head and disappeared.

"EDI, get me Hackett. He needs..." her words were cut off as a bolt of energy flashed past her and exploded in front of EDI as she moved toward the communications terminal.

Shepard spun to see Kai Leng bold as you like, brandishing his specialized gloves that emitted the energy bolts. "Not so fast," the man threatened.

"You," she growled, her skin turning blue as her biotics flared in anger.

"He did warn you not to overstay your welcome," he said snarkily. Then he ran at her and slammed the glove to the ground, shattering the specialized glass of the floor under her feet. She stumbled as she fell the couple of feet to the maintenance crawlspace below. He came at her again, swinging his sword which she blocked with her shotgun three times before he lifted it over his head. She took the opportunity to kick him away from her and regain some balance. She called up her omniblade and left it active for each time he came at her. Cerberus minions swarmed in from everywhere, leaving it a one on one fight between him and her as Garrus and EDI fought off the slack. He must have still been hurting after his battle with Miranda, because he was slower than she remembered. She used as many overloads as she could charge to get his shields down. When they fell, she hit him with bullets, biotics and good old fashioned fists when she could get in close without worrying about his sword. This time around, he was the one bleeding, not her. She fought relentlessly, even as she realized that Garrus and EDI had taken care of their enemies, but instead of stepping in, they watched her destroy Kai Leng. Her final shot was from her biotics. She sent a warp into him that dropped him to his knees and then he fell on his face, his mouth bleeding.

The fight was over. He was down and she was relatively unharmed. She resisted the urge to spit on him before she turned away and picked her way across the destroyed floor to try and reach Hackett. She sat down in the Illusive Man's chair while EDI and Garrus watched the fighting going on outside. A small noise made her eyes narrow and she continued to work the console, but listened intently. Small grunts signaled the bastard was back on his feet and coming towards her. She remained calm and let him come. Her companions were too far away to do much good around the screens blocking them from her. When he was right behind her, she caught a glimpse of his reflection in a piece of the remaining floor. He had his sword raised over her and was fixing to stab down. She stood and spun in one quick movement, her armored hand raising up to bat the sword away, shattering the blade to pieces. With the other hand, her omniblade flipped out of it's hiding place and she stabbed up through his ribs and into his heart. "That was for Thane you Son-of-a-bitch," she snarled as blood gurgled in his throat. Then she ripped her blade out and pushed him away.

As soon as Kai Leng fell dead and Garrus ran to her side, she raised her hand to let him know she was fine. The VI reappeared. "The Citadel is in position. The Reapers are preparing to complete their harvest of your species."

"I'll stop them," she said, staring at the blood as it pooled from Leng's chest.

"It is too late. I recommend investigating a means..."

"I'll stop them," she said again, her eyes narrowing as she challenged the VI. Then with a nod of her head, she called her people to her so they could leave this hell hole of a station and get to Earth and finish the Reapers.

 


	38. Did We Just Get Shot By a Reaper?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Earth is under Siege. Can Shepard make it through No Man's Land and get to the beam to the Citadel?

Shepard sullenly left the War room after her debrief with Hackett. She hugged herself as she stood waiting in the scanners while her two favorite privates talked excitedly about returning to Earth and the war ending. All Shepard could think was that this was likely the last time she would be doing her rounds. She stepped up to Traynor and tapped the Specialist on her shoulder.

Traynor turned and smiled. "Ready whenever you are, Commander."

"Specialist Traynor..." Shepard prompted, hating how the girl sounded both excited and frightened.

"I'm all right, really. I'm as surprised about it as you are," she said in response to Shepard's tone. "But, I'm all right..."

"You're a credit to your uniform, Samantha," Shepard said with all of the seriousness she had to give. Traynor had been extremely helpful throughout the whole war in spite of never thinking she'd serve on a ship. She had been directly responsible for saving both Jack and Jacob and she had found Sanctuary. Not to mention she was delightful to play chess with.

Traynor softened her voice and saluted. "I had a very compelling example," she said with a smile.

Shepard found herself hugging Traynor and choking back tears. "Thank you for everything." Then she fled. She needed to get control of herself or she would never make it through her rounds. She took deep breaths as she headed for the bridge where EDI and Joker waited.

Shepard stepped quietly into the cockpit, her arms wrapped around herself as she played it off as a confident stance. EDI glanced at her momentarily and Joker slowly and regretfully took a small sip of a glass of whiskey that he had been nursing for what looked like a long time. He sighed. "Remember our first run to Eden Prime all those years ago, with the Turian SPECTRE watching us?"

"Nihlus," she recalled with a grin. She had liked Nihlus. He had seemed like a good person, even with as few times as they had spoken.

"Yeah. I told you that mission was going to be bigger than we thought," he said swirling the half emptied glass then setting it down by his console, making a face that said his heart wasn't in it.

She chuckled softly, rubbing her upper arms nervously. "I think you can mark that prediction down as accurate..."

"And now we're heading back to Earth..." he prompted, his fingers playing over each other as he wrung his hands.

"Is this mission gonna be bigger than we thought, too?" she asked, almost not wanting to hear his answer.

"Man I hope not," his usual sarcasm returned to his, up until this point, solemn tone. "a nice routine delivery run would be fine with me." He paused, glancing down at the drink, but leaving it where it sat. "It's been an honor, Commander."

She grinned, "Same here, Joker. I don't know how it's going to end, but whatever happens..."

"What do you mean, 'whatever happens'?" he asked sardonically as a snort escaped his nose. "Everyone knows what's gonna happen... You're gonna kick some Reaper ass. That's what you do. And I'll be flying you there in style."

She shook her head, the goofy grin still on her face. Joker may not be right, but that he believed she could do it was truly inspirational. "The Normandy is ready, Shepard." EDI chimed in. "All systems are armed, all ammunition is loaded, all reloads have been manufactured. Thruster fuel is at maximum. Cyberwarfare suits have evolved in ways that it would be computationally impossible to predict. I have also kissed Joker for luck..." She grinned past Shepard to a blushing Joker.

Shepard chuckled. "We're definitely going to win now," she agreed then with a nod to both of them, she took her leave to find the others. She started down in the shuttle bay where James and Steve were both pumped to be getting back to Earth. It had been a long time coming for James. He was definitely ready. They had a few laughs and then she headed up to engineering to see Javik and Tali. Tali was nowhere to be found at first, so Shepard went to port cargo where Javik leaned over his water table. There was a readout of the Normandy on his console. "Looks familiar," she said, leaning on the interface.

He glanced over at her, his fingers gliding through the water and rippling the smooth surface. "I have been studying this ship, it's crew. There was a Normandy before this one. You died in an attack..."

"Something like that," she sighed, the short flash of her heart beating faster passing quickly as she relived the moment. It was much less intense than it used to be, but it was still unpleasant.

"But then you were resurrected... to fight the Reapers."

"Maybe you and I have a thing or two in common," she said, fighting the urge to nudge him with her elbow. Javik was not a toucher unless he wanted to 'read' something from her.

"But you have something else. The reasons you fight are still alive. The friendships of the people around you, and more..." he alluded, stepping closer. "You and the Turian are... joined?"

"You could say that," she agreed at his questioning look.

"I'm not. Your pheromones are," he pointed out. "Is this why you wish to continue living? For their affection?"

She thought about her friends and what would happen to Garrus if she left him alone. It was not a thought she liked having. He'd fallen so far the last time. He'd probably be dead on Omega if she hadn't come back. She wouldn't let that happen again if she could help it. "Without that 'affection', all I have in my life is death, and that's not enough."

After a short pause he actually agreed with her. "Yes."

"What about you?" she asked. "I respect your reasons for being here, but I get the feeling there's something more, Javik." He glanced over at the memory shard that still hovered on the opposite table and then blatantly looked away. "What's in here?" she asked, approaching the shard, her hand hovering over it, but not touching. She didn't need more Prothean tech in her head.

"It is called the Echo Shard. Passed from soldier to soldier, Prothean to Prothean. Each adds their memories to it."

"Like a beacon," she said, pulling her hand away and into a fist to rub her fingertips on her palm. "How far back does it go?"

"To a time before the Reapers," he admitted. "It is all that is left of my people."

"And you don't want to remember them?" she asked.

"Imagine if everyone you knew was dead. You could not remember their faces, or the color of the sky above your home. The memories were gone, but so was the pain... Would you want to remember that, Commander? Even if it meant watching everyone die again..."

She opened her mouth to say no, but then she thought of her clone and how she had turned out without Shepard's memories and her feelings. She never wanted to be that cold or empty, but she would never force that upon someone who was content with living without their memories. She may have wanted to remember, but he clearly didn't. "Reopening old wounds, especially big ones, isn't going to help." She sighed.

"Perhaps you are right," he agreed with what sounded like relief. "There were others... Soldiers who served under me. Like your crew."

"What happened to them?" she asked, probably not wanting to know the answer, but asking anyway.

"They are dead. Where I left them..." he said turning away from her.

"We have a saying," she told him. "Let old ghosts rest."

"Then there is some wisdom in this cycle," he rested his palms on the outer edge of his water table.

"If you can live by it," she agreed and left him with his thoughts.

Back up on the crew deck, Kaidan was staring out the observation window. She swallowed and approached the window, shifting from one foot to the other. Kaidan sighed and turned to look at her with a wry smile. "Hey, Shepard."

"Hey, ready to head home?" she asked, her arms secured behind her back, her hands clasped tightly.

"Home... Back to Earth. Oh Yeah, I'm ready," he almost whispered.

"About time," she said.

"About freakin' time," his voice rose before he chuckled. "And if the Reapers messed with anything I left behind, I am going to be so pissed."

She chuckled, relaxing and pulling her arms from behind her to hug herself. There was a short comfortable silence as he studied her. He knew her well enough to know she had something else to say. She opened her mouth in a few false starts before spitting it out. "I wanted to thank you."

"For?" he asked, his right eyebrow lifting in a question as he crossed his arms to regard her.

She pursed her lips and raised her own brow. "For being here... even after..."

He held up a palm. "Shepard... don't. I can't say that I wasn't hurt when I found out about you and Garrus, but I gave you every reason to think I was never coming back. I'm 35, Shepard. I'm too old to not accept that you've moved on. You couldn't have picked a more perfect person. Garrus is a good guy."

She smiled, feeling the burning of tears in the corners of her eyes. Kaidan held out his arms and beckoned her forward. She fell into his arms and he hugged her. "You deserve all of the happiness you can find," she sniffed as he patted her back.

"Let's finish this war first," he said with a chuckle. He pulled away, gracing her with a lopsided grin before saying. "I'll see you topside, Shepard."

She backed out of the observation room and headed for Miranda's old office where Liara had moved into. The Asari was busy checking her equipment which glyph helpfully informed her was the seventh time she had done so. Their conversation was short as Liara's console pinged that she had new messages. She shooed Shepard with an apologetic look. Shepard hunted for Tali, but couldn't find her. She must have missed the Quarian in passing and she sighed. She would need to hunt her down, but while she was here, she headed for the Main battery where she was bound to find Garrus calibrating her guns.

When the battery doors opened, she was surprised to find Tali and Garrus standing across from each other. The Quarian cocked her head and said, "Shepard. We were just saying goodbye."

Garrus set down the bit of weapon mod he had been tinkering with and grinned at her. "And making friendly wagers."

"Optimistic wagers in your case," Tali teased.

"A Turian military operative competing with a Quarian mechanic..." his brow plates raised. "and I'm the optimistic one?"

"Do you remember Feros?" she asked tauntingly.

"Yes it was filled with Geth. Which tilted the odds in your favor," he admitted.

"Excuses, excuses," Tali sighed, shaking her head.

"I doubt you'll be hacking any synthetics this time," he pointed out.

"I still have the shotgun," she shrugged.

"I'll be sure to let a few Reaper forces get close enough for you to use it," he teased with a wink to Shepard.

"Thanks!" Tali said sarcastically. "Of course, if they get past me, they'll be right on top of you."

"That's what the armor's for," he made his own shrug.

Shepard smiled at her two best friends. "You two have been with me longer than most. You believed in me when nobody else did. Thanks."

Tali scoffed and Garrus' mandibles flared out then back in to rest slightly away from his cheeks. "Keelah Se'lai, Shepard," Tali said softly as she adjusted her suit. She had informed Shepard that she had allowed a Geth to download into her suit and she was one of the subjects working toward peace by allowing the Geth to jump-start their immune systems so they might not need their enviro suits anymore. Shepard wondered if the presence was intrusive. If so, Tali never mentioned it. Shepard was so impressed by how much her friend had matured from the bouncy little firecracker she'd saved from an assassin on the wards. Soon she might be able to share herself with the universe. If they managed to save everyone.

"Well, you did give me some incentive," Garrus purred and Tali groaned. Shepard chuckled. "At least we finally killed Lieutenant Bastard Kai Leng," he said with a shrug. "I just hope we get to do the same to his general. It's kind of amazing how everything's come full circle. The Citadel's been the center of galactic civilization, a Reaper trap, and my source of employment for a long time... and now it's our salvation for any chance at winning this war. I think it's time we got you back home, Shepard. Earth will either be remembered as the place where we beat the Reapers... or it'll be a smoking ruin for the next cycle to wonder about."

Killing Kai Leng had definitely been a bonus that had made their trip to Cerberus Headquarters feel almost worth it. She sighed and held out her arms. "You guys are my two favorite aliens," she said beckoning them to her. They both came without hesitation and they shared a group hug, Tali chuckling as her small frame nearly disappeared between the two of them. "I love you guys."

"You say the nicest things," Tali snickered.

They pulled away from each other and Shepard left them to their goodbyes and their wagering. She went up to her room to make a few last minute preparations before they were to rendezvous with Hackett's ship and the rest of the fleets so they could all go through the relay together.

* * *

 

A few hours later, Joker's voice hummed over the comms in her room. "Commander, you've got a priority message from Admiral Hackett, requesting to come aboard.

She was up out of her seat and heading for the elevator before he even finished his sentence. "Permission granted," she relayed as the elevator began to descend.

"Aye, Commander," Joker said and she tapped her foot as the elevator took her to the CIC.

She exited and waited by Traynor's station as Hackett made his way to her. They paused and regarded each other with wary smiles before both saluting each other. "Commander."

"Admiral," she greeted him formally.

"Are you ready to bring the might of the galaxy to bear on the Reapers?" Hackett asked. They had everyone they could get. It was time.

"Yes, sir!" she answered, her voice unwavering even as her insides trembled.

He grinned and held out his hand which she shook vigorously. "Then let's make sure the fleets are ready." He passed her as she stepped aside to grant him access to her station at the Galaxy map where he could address the entirety of the fleets. She barely heard his rousing speech over the frantic beating of her own heart. Her hands twitched behind her back as she stood at ease. When he wrapped it up quickly, she snapped out of herself to follow him to the QEC where he said Anderson was on the line. "Shepard. The sword fleets are ready to strike at the Reapers surrounding Earth. While they keep the enemy engaged, you and Hammer ground forces can take London."

"London?" she asked with curiosity as they stood in the scanners. "Why aren't we hitting the Citadel directly?"

"Anderson can brief you on that," he explained. When they entered the QEC, Anderson's holo had already been called up. He turned to face them as Hackett addressed him. "Admiral. How are you holding up?"

"We're ready to end this," Anderson said with a brief smile as he rubbed his shoulder. "But as you can see, the station's closed itself since it appeared over London." A schematic of the Citadel appeared beside them and as he said, the flower petal like arms were closed up, giving the station a bullet like appearance. The last time it had closed, she had been inside it. It was intriguing to see it from this perspective.

"Damn it," she sighed. "Got to get the arms open to dock the Crucible."

"Exactly," Hackett agreed.

Anderson picked up where Hackett stopped. "But London is surrounded by Hades cannons. Hammer transports can't land while they're active. You'll lead a squadron of smaller shuttles. Infiltrate with a ground team to take out the cannons using heavy weapons. Hammer can land and we'll set up a Forward Operations Base."

"I still don't see how we're getting to the Citadel from London," she asked with a frown.

Anderson sent another holo to replace the Citadel. "The Reapers use this beam to transport humans, alive and dead, to the Citadel. From the FOB, Hammer will launch an all out assault on the Citadel beam. Everyone who makes it that far will take the beam to the Citadel, then locate and activate the Citadel arm controls."

"Once we see those arms, Shield Fleet will escort the Crucible to the Citadel," Hackett finished. "But timing will be critical. We don't have enough firepower to keep the Crucible safe for long."

"Nothing's ever easy," she scoffed. "No reason it should start now."

"It's desperate," Anderson agreed. "I don't even want to guess at our odds, but..."

"But this is the only plan we have. If we wait, the Reapers bleed us slowly. Conventionally... we can't beat the Reapers without the Crucible. Get the Citadel arms open, Commander... whatever the cost. We'll do the rest." Hackett ordered.

 _No pressure_ , she thought. What she said was, "Yes, sir." He started away from them to get his fleet prepared from his own ship.

"Good luck... to all of us," he said with a brief turn to look at them again.

* * *

 

Their plan was set. Shepard donned her weapons and armor and stood behind Joker, the Normandy at the head of the Fleets. Never before had she commanded so many ships. Joker listed the fleets as they reported in after they slipped through the relay, coming out almost on top of Earth. Alliance, Turian, Asari, Quarian, Geth... The fleet was massive. The races without a heavy military or space faring ships were scattered across multiple other fleets, or came in on their own. Some had already landed ages ago and had been fighting on Earth. She knew most of her friends had gone planet side already. Jack, Jacob, Miranda, Samara, Zaeed, and Grunt were already in London. She itched to get down there and start helping. "Ready to engage on your command," Joker said gently, as if he could feel her tension.

As they approached Earth, she saw the sheer numbers of Reapers congregated around the Citadel as it orbited the planet. There were thousands of them, waiting to annihilate anything that got in their way. "This is it, everyone." She said over the fleet-wide comm channel. "Be ready on my signal!" They slowly approached the Reaper line and she saw a few of them waving their tentacle arms, readying to fire concentrated laser blasts into her fleet. As soon as they were in range, she gave the order. "Fire!"

All around the Normandy, different colored lasers and bullets flew past to slam silently into the Reapers. A war in space definitely was a quiet thing. It was sort of eerie. After giving the order, she watched the smaller fighters zip into the fray, causing havoc among the Reapers as they quickly fired their weapons and then flew out of sight. Some of them were taken down when the round eyeball laser fighters they had encountered at the Collector base began to appear from the midst of the Reapers. The marine leading the fighters pointed them out and the battle was on. When the first Reaper exploded under Turian fire, Shepard couldn't help the smile that spread over her face. For the first time since Cerberus Headquarters, she found her hope again. The fighters were wrecking the tiny eyeball forces. "Breaking off, preparing for descent," Joker intoned as the Normandy dropped down from where it hovered to stealth its way through the battle so she could escape on the Kodiak to lead Hammer to the ground. EDI smashed through any fighters in her path, the Thanix Cannon obliterating everything it hit, Garrus' calibrations hard at work. When they broke through the line into an empty pocket of space between Earth and the Reapers, she turned and with a nod to Joker giving him the ship. Before she left the cockpit, he stopped her. "Commander." She turned and saw him getting awkwardly from his chair and turning to face her. When he caught his footing, he saluted her. "Be careful down there."

She couldn't help the smile as she returned the formal salute. He deserved it. "We'll be fine. Stay focused." Once she dropped her arm, she patted his arm gently.

"Aye, Aye," he said with a smirk and returned to his seat.

The gesture filled her with a sense of home. The crew of the Normandy was more than just her crew. They had been with her through thick and thin. They had rebelled with her, stolen an Alliance frigate, joined Cerberus for her, stuck by her during every crazy mission and every insane order. They were her family. She wouldn't fail them. No matter what, she would see them alive through this war.

Everyone waited in the shuttle bay, all geared up. EDI joined them soon after. She and her small team would take the Kodiak they usually flew in and Kaidan would lead the others in the spare shuttle. Garrus and Tali stood beside Steve in their usual casual manner, the three of them chuckling at something Steve had said. By the other shuttle, Kaidan and Liara grinned at each other, EDI and Javik stood as far apart as they could manage and James was poking at Javik, trying to get him to talk. The Prothean had his arms crossed stoically and Shepard smiled. Her family.

"Alright, slackers. It's time to go," she announced as she checked her seals on her suit one last time before punching Garrus' arm as she passed him to hop on the Kodiak. The air in the shuttle bay was tense and she wanted to get going before the tension turned to fear.

 

* * *

 

The shuttles launched, and Garrus sat beside her as Tali dropped across from them, her elbows on her knees and her head hung. Joker appeared on the comm screen and said, "Advance teams are away. Hammer's in position and waiting for you guys to clear a path. Normandy's rejoining sword."

She nodded and stood, unable to contain her nerves. She could hear Garrus' soft cooing, but for once, it wasn't helping. "Stay safe. I'll be back before you know it."

"I'll hold you to that," Joker smirked. "Normandy out." His face disappeared and she paced to the cockpit to hover behind Steve.

"We're closing in on the LZ, Commander." Steve told her.

"How's it look?" She asked, afraid to get a glimpse of Earth and what state it was in. She'd seen Palaven and Thessia burning. Earth was likely no different.

"Like hell," Steve confirmed. "Take a look for yourself." He brought the shuttle's camera feeds up onto the screen and she gasped. Small fires burned everywhere, cars were abandoned, streets were rubble and buildings crumbled.

Garrus got up to stand beside her and take a look for himself. His coo turned to a rumble of anger towards the Reapers. She knew how he felt. "Sorry, Shepard. I know it isn't easy."

"I barely even recognize it," she said with a sigh as Tali's hand fell on her shoulder.

The shuttle jostled as Steve dodged fire. "Shit! We've got a lock, hold on," he grumbled, his fingers flying over the console. He artfully steered the Kodiak out of danger, but the shuttle beside them wasn't so lucky. It took a hit and caught fire, careening toward a building nearby that was partially destroyed and crashing in an brief explosion. "Damn it!" Steve cursed.

"Status?" she asked, knowing from the markings on the side that it had not been the other team's shuttle.

"That was the squad responsible for taking out that defense turret," he informed her. The turret in question, the one who had tried to take them out, was a giant construction that looked like a Reaper without a head. It was shooting down everything that got close enough with a huge electrical current that burned really hot.

"Who's on it now?" she asked.

"Nobody in the vicinity," he sighed. "All either deployed or shot down."

"Drop us off," she ordered, heading for the hatch and readying her shotgun.

"Ma'am?" Cortez asked.

"We have to take that thing out before Hammer can land," she insisted. They were the only ones left. If they didn't get the reinforcements in, the rest of her family would be fighting a losing battle further in the fray.

"Understood," Steve said and regretfully circled around to avoid the fire from the cannon and bring them to a safe place to land.

"Change of plans, people," she announced to Garrus and Tali. "We're gonna take out that Hades cannon."

"On foot? That'll be a challenge," Garrus pointed out.

"That downed shuttle would have been carrying heavy weapons," Steve informed them.

"Perfect. You heard the man," she said with determination as she felt the shuttle pause and hover. "Once we're clear, make your way to the crashed shuttle. We'll search the wreckage for heavy weapons." She opened the hatch and Shepard hopped out, her team on her heels and they were immediately under fire. Her shields took a few good hits before Garrus sniped the Marauder with the assault rifle so she could get to cover.

"You know... I never thought visiting my girlfriend's home planet would involve heavy weapons fire," he quipped as they began to push forward and Steve took off to give them a small amount of covering fire.

"Everything you do with Shepard involves heavy weapons fire," Tali pointed out as she called her combat drone into the fray.

"You did bring sniper rifles to our first picnic, Big Guy," Shepard pointed out, charging her incinerate as she shotgunned a Maurauder that was getting too close.

He purred with laughter. "Yeah, well, I just had to know who was really better."

"Keep rubbing it in," she said with a sigh as Tali chuckled.

They stepped from the stairwell that Steve had dropped them in and into a wide open square. Reaper troops were dug in deep and they poured from just about everywhere. The ground shook every time the massive Reaper cannon fired and there were moments where she had to pause to catch her balance. As Shepard reached the iron fence that surrounded a small dog park in the middle of the square, Steve announced that he had spotted Brutes headed their way. She also heard a marine announcing that if they didn't hurry, Hammer was going to get torn apart. The pressure was on. She could almost feel the heat if it hadn't been so cold. By her calculations, it was December in London. The cold air slapped her in the face in the open area of the square as she scanned for the Brutes with her visor. "Shepard, next time we come back, let's make sure it's not winter, okay?" Garrus said with a shiver.

"Cheer up, Big Guy. It's a white Christmas." she felt the small flakes of snow falling on her cheeks as she spotted the Brutes. Two of them on their 3.

"Christmas?" he asked, cocking his head before taking down a Cannibal to her left.

"Human holiday... gifts, hot cocoa, Santa Claus..." she murmured, trying to hash out a plan to get around the Brutes without being seen. "I'll teach you all about it after this is over. I'll even buy you an Ugly Christmas Sweater."

"Why does it have to be ugly?" he asked with genuine curiosity, neither of them diverting their attention from the task at hand.

"It's tradition... like, uh... The Turian face marking after a joining ceremony," she said as the first example popped into her head. She bullied ahead, masking the blatant divulgence that she had been researching Turian traditions and ceremonies. "People will have competitions to see who can think up the ugliest sweater. Usually it involves a lot of bells, antlers and sometimes even tinsel." She pulled her lip back in disgust. She'd always hated tinsel.

He chuckled. "Sounds awful," he agreed.

"What in Keelah's name is tinsel, Shepard?" Tali asked.

"You really don't want to know," she answered. She moved them around the outer edge of the fencing, skirting the Brute's attention and silently taking down as many of the Cannibals and Marauders as they could without being seen. "Tell you what... We'll have Christmas on the Normandy once the Reapers are dead."

"Sounds like fun," Tali agreed.

They bypassed the Brutes and Shepard sighed as they began to climb up the fallen sides of the building where the shuttle had fallen. "Damn it! You've got airborne hostiles inbound! Gonna try to keep them off you!" Steve announced flying over head. She turned to watch him zip by and a Harvester on his tail hit him with plasma ball. "Damn it! I'm hit!" he shouted as the Kodiak caught fire and disappeared behind another building.

"Steve!" she shouted in a panic, frozen in place.

"I'm all right!" he called.

Her breath whooshed out in relief. "You sure?"

"But I won't be picking you up. I gotta land this bird quick!" he sighed.

"Get safe," she ordered and forced herself forward. That had been too close.

"Anything for you," he said, a smile evident in his tone.

They climbed the rubble and she spotted the downed shuttle with the heavy weapons on board. The Hades Cannon was directly in front of them and it fired again, the ground shaking her off balance. Garrus steadied her, his footing much more steady than hers on his strangely bent calves and ankles. She threw him a smile and headed for the shuttle. They ran into a few Marauders along the way and some Cannibals too. They easily took them down, and when they were clear for a few moments, she hunted around in the wreckage for the heavy weapons. Her visor picked up a slight radiation burst and she dug out the M-920 Cain from it's hiding spot. Hefting the weapon, she took aim at the heart of the Hades Cannon and pulled the trigger. The Cain's muzzle spun as it generated the firepower she would need to reach the Cannon and then as it glowed white hot, she released the trigger and the bundle of radioactive energy spat from the gun, knocking her backwards a few feet at the kickback. She kept her footing and prayed that the shot hit it's target. Massive relief fell over her as the energy hunted it's target and slipped inside the Cannon's outer shell to detonate beneath the casing. "Hell yes! Right down it's throat!" Garrus whooped as the thing exploded and fell.

"That's it! Last gun down!" she heard from the marine who had been commanding Hammer. "All Hammer teams, prepare for landing."

"Anybody, come in," Shepard pleaded over the comm. "We need extraction."

The comms hissed their silence just as they heard a blood chilling screech from the right. "We've got a Banshee, Shepard." Tali announced as she started to call up multiple programs on her omnitool.

While they tried to stay out of the Banshee's way, they slowly whittled her down. Shepard called out again. "This is Commander Shepard! Any Alliance personnel in the vicinity!"

After they took out the Banshee, a seemingly endless slew of Cannibals had apparently figured out where they were and continued to slither from the cracks in the building to assault them. After a full fifteen minutes of simply trying to survive, they were all running low on ammo and Shepard was starting to feel the fatigue of too much biotics. A beautiful sound hissed in her ear. "Commander. Prepare for extraction." She called her team to her side and watched the shuttle move to the other side of the broken down building. She sprinted to the opened hatch and jumped inside, the others close behind as the man who'd spoken gave them covering fire. Once they were on board and the hatch closed behind them. Shepard leaned her palms on her knees to catch her breath and the Major (judging from his armor) spoke again. "Get us out of here Corporal." Then he turned to Shepard. "You okay?"

"I'm alive," she agreed with a short chuckle, still panting.

"That you are, Commander."

She spun to face the pleasantly familiar voice. "Anderson!"

"I knew you wouldn't let me down Shepard," he said with a fatherly grin that she nearly melted into.

They briefly shook hands, but she threw protocol out the window and pulled him into a friendly hug. "It's good to see you."

"And you're a sight for sore eyes," he agreed, holding her at arms length to look her over. She had honestly thought she'd never see him again when she'd left him months ago to run the war from the relative safety of the Normandy. It had torn her up. Now here he was standing in front of her and making sure _she_ was okay.

"How are we looking?" she asked, pushing ahead before her emotions overwhelmed her.

"Now that the heavy air defenses are dealt with, Hammer can land," Anderson said with relief.

"And not a moment too soon," the Major said, his accent telling her he was a London native.

"What's left of the resistance is holding a Forward Operating Base," Anderson continued. "But the Reapers are countering already. Once we regroup, it's gonna be up to Hammer to take up the fight."

"They'll do whatever it takes to win this," she said, knowing that the army she had built would give up everything to see the continuation of civilization.

"Good," Anderson said, turning his attention to the readouts on the shuttle's screens. "That's what it's gonna take."

"We'll get it done, Anderson," she assured the battle weary Admiral.

He nodded toward the scenes of destruction. "I was born in London."

"Really?" she asked, a pang of sympathy flashing through her.

He refused to continue. Instead, he turned a small smile on her. "The entire galaxy united... Too bad it took the Reapers to bring us together."

Garrus cleared his throat. "Shepard's the one that brought them together."

Apparently giving the Reapers credit for her achievement rubbed him wrong. "That's exactly what I meant," Anderson rephrased. "I know you didn't like leaving, Shepard, but nobody could've accomplished what you've done."

"It's good to be back home." She said it automatically, but Earth had never been her home. She had been raised on Mindoir and served her time in the foster system on another colony world. After joining the Alliance she had never had a planet that she called home. She lived from ship to ship, finding odd places to stay between assignments. She'd only ever lived on Earth during her incarceration.

"There's the FOB," the Major pointed out and the shuttle began it's descent. They touched down snuggled in a hollowed out building.

The scene was oddly quiet as they stepped out of the shuttle. She and Anderson were approached by a marine who informed them that they had set up a command center in an adjacent building. "Looks like we've still got groups coming in," Anderson pointed out.

"Yes, sir. But not as many as we'd hoped," the marine said sadly.

Anderson hummed his own disappointment then looked to Shepard. "Come see me when you're ready, Shepard." Then he headed to the building with the marine.

"Will do," she sighed.

Garrus cleared his throat behind her. "He's right. I expected to see more of Hammer here by now."

"A lot of them won't be making it," she replied sullenly, stepping forward to look out over the tattered streets below. She sighed and turned to look at him and Tali. "You two go on ahead. I'll catch up."

The Major, whom she'd heard the marine greet as Coats, approached her. "The fighting here's been some of the worst on the planet. It looks bad, but there's still hope." He paused as she looked away. "And _you're_ here. It'll do the troops good to see you. Bolster their resolve."

"I'm just a soldier like them," she sighed. Why had everyone continuously tossed all of these leadership hats on her head? There were others out there who could have been as lucky as she was.

"You might see yourself like that, but they don't," he insisted. "Like it or not, Commander. You're a hero to these men and women. Don't discount the effect that can have on them... I'd better go meet up with my battalion. I'll see you at the Command Center."

Coats left her with a lot to think about on top of her other burdens, now she was meant to be the poster child for the little guy. She walked past the fluttering papers and other light debris as it blew around in the winter air. Her breath puffed out in front of her as she walked through the FOB. When she got to the ground, outside, she spotted James, meandering around with a few other nameless soldiers. She was glad to see the other shuttle had made it. As she approached and he recognized her, he smiled. "Hey, Commander."

She stepped back in surprise. "What, no 'Lola'?"

He snorted and shrugged his beefy shoulders. "Yeah, sorry."

"You okay?" she asked as his usual calm demeanor was no where to be seen.

"I don't know what I thought I'd feel coming back to Earth. I was ready to fight, ready to die if I had to... but seeing everything like this..." His eyes wandered from her to glance around at the mess.

"I know it's hard to see, but this is only temporary. First, we need to win this thing," she said, her voice gentle. "Stay focused. Don't let them take your will to fight."

He threw up his palms. "I know, I know," he said with a soft chuckle. "You're right... So I guess this is it, no? One more push... One last fight..."

"Not necessarily our last," she said with a shrug, although her gut told her otherwise.

James pulled his feet together, straightened his stance and saluted her. "It's been an honor serving with you, Shepard."

She brushed off his formal salute and reached her hand out to shake his. "You're a good man and a terrific soldier."

"Thanks," he said with another snort.

"Whatever happens out there today, I know you'll make me proud," she said with confidence.

"That means a lot to me ma'am... Good luck out there... Lola." He smirked, his lips cocking sideways and she nodded and left him to his duties.

As she walked amongst the busy FOB, hearing radio chatter reporting death everywhere, she hugged herself and spotted another of her people. "Hey, Kaidan."

"Hey, Shepard," he turned to face her, holding a hand up to the soldier he'd been talking with.

"You ready?" she asked.

"Absolutely," he answered. "For anything. Bring it on."

"And Biotics division. Your students?" she asked, knowing he had spent the better part of the war tracking them down in his spare time.

He chuckled. "More than ready. Eager. That's youth for you. Guess we're old soldiers, hey Shepard?"

She snorted. "Yeah, I guess we are."

His eyes fell to the ground. "Comrades in arms. We know the score. We know this is goodbye." His feet shuffled.

"We're gonna win this thing," she corrected him, getting closer to him so she could pull his gaze back to her.

"Don't get me wrong. I'm gonna fight like hell to see you on the other side," he admitted, "But listen, there's... things I want to say." He took a deep sigh as her insides knotted up. "Looking back... I have a few regrets, but not many. That's pretty damn amazing, right?" He glanced up at the darkened sky as snow fell on his cheeks. "Messed up kid that I was, never would have dreamed of the life I've had. And I owe a lot of that to you, you know?"

"Been quite a ride," she agreed, remembering back to the good times they'd spent together.

"It sure has..." His hand found her upper arm. "But how are you doing? Scared?"

She glanced back at him and with mirth in her voice she said, "Damn straight, I'm scared. But that fear's gonna keep me alive long enough to strike these bastards right through the heart..." She sighed heavily.

"Yeah, exactly..." he agreed, a little less enthusiastically.

She took a deep breath and pulled a note from a pouch on her hip that she had written before they left Cronos station. She patted the folded paper on her opposite palm before holding it out to him. "Listen, Kaidan. You're just about the only person who knows how it feels..." she sighed again, trying to find the words. "If I don't... I need you to take care of Garrus for me. Don't let him destroy himself... Please."

He took the note, his mouth agape. Then he looked up at her, his brown eyes swimming with tears. "O... Of course, Shepard. Although, I'd prefer if you didn't make me have to."

"I need a contingency plan. You and I both know I might not make it through this. If I don't and he does... I don't even want to think about what he might do." she sighed. Her own eyes burning.

Kaidan stepped forward and pulled her against him for a gentle hug. "You have my word."

She let him comfort her until her emotions calmed and then she pulled away. "So... take care, Major."

"You too, Commander," he said with a gentle smirk. "Well, I should find the rest of my squad."

"Yeah," she said passing by him to go into the building behind him where she saw they had set up a communications center.

She heard his final comment as she left. "You know... I've never been to London."

Inside the Comm Center, there was a portable QEC set up and she was able to get in touch with everyone she was concerned over. Including her Cerberus crew like Jack, Miranda, Grunt and the others who were fighting on the front lines. Everyone seemed okay and she even spoke with Steve who had found an evac back to the Normandy. Knowing everyone was still alive made her feel a bit better as she climbed the rubble into the building that connected to the still standing high-rise where the Command center was housed. When she reached an enclosed room, she found a squad of Turians huddled inside the relative warmth of the building's walls. Primarch Victus stood among them, handing out orders while Garrus helped coordinate with the Alliance forces. It wasn't exactly the private setting she had hoped for, but she needed to speak with Garrus and now was the only chance she might get.

When he saw her approach, he adjusted the assault rifle he had in his grip and his subharmonics started to purr in a sad sound that she had never heard before. A few other Turians glanced in their direction but he ignored them. "Shepard, so I guess this is..."

She cut him off with a halfhearted chuckle. "Just like old times?"

After a few moments of heart wrenching noises while he cleared his throat and tried to get himself under control, he hummed then said, "Might be the last chance we get to say that."

She frowned at his uncharacteristic attitude. "Think we're gonna lose?"

In a split second, his subharmonic cut off and he returned to his usual tone, his cocky attitude returning. Shepard balked, recognizing his soldier mask. She didn't think he'd ever used it on her before. "No. I think we're about to kick the Reapers back into whatever black hole they crawled out of. Then, we're going to retire somewhere warm and tropical and live off the royalties from the vids," he grinned then cleared his throat. "Maybe even find out what a Turian-human baby looks like."

She chuckled, masking the fact that her heart had just leapt up into her throat. How many times had she thought about that very same thing. She knew it was impossible, but she had no clue that he had ever thought about their future like she had. "I'm game," she shrugged. "Though, I think adoption's a better idea... Biology may not cooperate."

"Hmm," he said, his mandibles spreading further from his face as he smiled at her positive answer. "I suppose there _will_ be a lot of little Krogan around soon."

Her good mood fell as she remembered where they were. "We just have to beat the Reapers first," she said with a sigh.

"James told me there's an old saying here on Earth. 'May you be in Heaven half and hour before the devil knows you're dead...'" he sighed then met her gaze with his intense blue eyes. "Not sure if Turian Heaven is the same as yours, but if this thing goes sideways and we both end up there... meet me at the bar. I'm buying."

She nearly broke out in tears. She attempted to play it cool in front of the other Turians and swallowed the burning in her eyes. Her people all knew about their relationship. She wasn't sure how much his family or the Primarch was privy to. "We're a team, Garrus. There's no Shepard without Vakarian, so you better remember to duck."

"Sorry," he said, frustrating her to no end. "Turians don't know how, but I'll improvise. And Shepard..." he stepped as close as he could to her and took one of her hands in his. "Forgive the insubordination, but your boyfriend has an order for you... Come back alive. It'd be an awfully empty galaxy without you." He pulled her face to his and kissed her in the very human fashion. His tongue slipped into her mouth as tears dripped down her cheeks.

When she pulled away there were Turians looking on in interest, but he had eyes only for her. "Goodbye, Garrus. And if I'm up in that bar and you're not, I'll be looking down. You'll never be alone." Then she forced herself away from him and fled. If she stayed another minute, she may just retire early.

The pit in her stomach was growing as she made her way back outside to cross the makeshift walkway they had made out of the wall of shipping crates they'd erected to keep the area secured. Gun fire and explosions rocked the base from the outer wall and she watched as a fighter flew over and took out a group of husks and Cannibals that were trying to climb the walls. She jogged out of the way and back inside to the building that they had turned into a command center/ triage unit. Just inside the entrance, she found Liara, omnitool glowing as she studied a few of the injured that were lying on cots all around.

"How are the casualties," Shepard asked, uncertain if she wanted the truth or an optimistic lie.

Liara glanced at her and studied her to see which answer she was going to give. Shepard knew she looked flustered. After that revealing conversation with Garrus, she could feel the redness in her cheeks and the flush beneath her skin. "We lost people. Some of the wounded her won't make it," she said with a sigh, shutting down her omnitool.

"The Reapers are closing in," Shepard said, her gut twisting even further. "How are you holding up, Liara?"

"This is it, isn't it?" she asked, not gracing Shepard with her expression.

"Yeah, this is it," she agreed, approaching Liara to put a hand on her shoulder.

"I... don't know what to say," she said with a soft chuckle. "I just know I'll have a clever line five minutes from now... I do have one thing for you, Shepard. A gift. It'll only take a moment, if you want it."

Liara turned to regard her with a gentle smile that showed her sadness at the potential for disaster. "What kind of gift?" Shepard asked, wondering why Liara's cheeks were flushed purple.

"Do you remember when I first joined my consciousness to yours? I can show you some of my own memories. Asari exchange them sometimes with their friends or people they respect. It can also be a way to say farewell," she said lowering her head.

"I'd be honored," she said, making Liara glance up and smile.

"Close your eyes," Liara coached, stepping close to touch her arms. Shepard did as she was told and soon found herself inside her own mind. Liara stood beside her. It was dark and small pinpricks of light floated on the air like hundreds of tiny seeds from a dandelion puff. Shepard looked around at the encompassing darkness, but it didn't frighten her like the vacuum did. She felt warm and comfortable. Safe even. Liara smiled and directed her attention to a strip of light on the horizon. She linked her arm with Shepard's and leaned her head on her shoulder as they both watched the slew of happy memories that Liara chose to share. Shepard gave herself over to the gift, allowing Liara to see a bit of herself as well. When the sensation of falling pulled her from the warmth, she opened her eyes and Liara was still in front of her, her expression one of thoughtfulness. "Thank you. For everything."

Shepard frowned and cocked her head. "Anything."

Before Liara let Shepard's hands go, she smiled and squeezed them lightly. "When everything is over, I think you, me and Garrus need to sit down and have a talk about your problem."

"Our problem?" she asked with curiosity.

"The fact that biology won't cooperate with you..." she alluded with a small smile.

"You... how?" Shepard stammered.

Liara let out a light chuckle. "When someone inexperienced with a consciousness exchange is involved with one, sometimes things that are on their mind will surface and the Asari they are sharing with can inadvertently see a little further than they had intended."

Shepard forgave the fact that she had let her guard down and a slight flutter in her stomach made her ask Liara the important question. "Back up... you can help with that?"

"In a manner of speaking," she shrugged. "As you know, Asari can reproduce with any species and any gender. We use our partner's DNA, shaping it with our consciousness to meld it with ours. Theoretically, I could take a bit of both you and Garrus and meld those bits together with my own DNA. I would act as the surrogate and the daughter would be Asari, but she would be _yours_."

Shepard gaped. "You would do that?"

Liara smiled sheepishly. "You and Garrus are among my closest friends. If it were possible... this is all still theory. I've never heard of anyone doing this before... I would gladly give you the chance to start a family.

Shepard didn't know what to say. It was definitely a conversation for another time. "We will definitely have that chat after all of this is over," Shepard smiled, gripping Liara's hands tightly and then hugging her close. "But let's not say anything to Garrus for now," she said, her eyes widening.

"Of course not, Shepard." Liara agreed as she finally let Shepard's hands go.

"Geez," Shepard mumbled as she walked off. "Godmother of the year award goes to..."

She picked her way through the damaged building and found Javik looking out over the War Zone ahead of them that the radio chatter was calling No Man's Land. "Commander," he said in way of greeting, not bothering to turn to look at her.

"Was it this bad in your time?" She asked, looking for some insight.

"Worse," he admitted. "I have been listening to the Krogan speak to his men," Javik told her, tossing his head behind him where Wrex stood on a pile of rubble and shouted down to a mess of Krogan down below. "In our cycle, the races never came together. There was no rallying cry. I envy you."

"Really? There's not much left out there," she sighed as she looked at the war torn streets of London.

"The future is still out there. It is something my people could never say. There will be a tomorrow," he said quietly.

"Only if we win today," she reminded him.

"No one else has ever made it this far," he said, finally turning his neck to look at her.

"You came a long way, Javik. Further than anyone else here," she pointed out, crossing her arms to mirror his stance.

"And I look forward to fulfilling my mission," he said dramatically. "But you are now the avatar of this cycle. The exemplar of victory. Not just for humanity or Turians, or Protheans, but for all life. Every soul that has ever existed is watching this moment."

"Well, no pressure when you put it that way," she shrugged, expecting no less from him.

"Do not waver. Victory is never won without difficult choices." His wisdom did not disappoint.

"I know. I've had to make a lot of those," she said with a ragged sigh as she thought about all of her friends that she'd watched die.

"There may be more..." he prompted. "But I know you will see this through. For all of us, no matter the cost." He held out his hand, surprising her. She took it immediately in case she might insult him with her shock. He shook her hand stiffly, but the fact that he had voluntarily touched her was a step in a direction that may someday lead to friendship. At least if she had anything to say about it.

"If we actually pull this off, what will you do afterwards?" she asked with curiosity. Javik didn't really strike her as a nine to five office work kind of guy.

"Since my birth, life's only pursuit has been war. I look forward to seeing what peace looks like," he said with a shrug.

"It's a big galaxy," Shepard pushed.

"Perhaps I will write a book with the Asa... with Dr. T'Soni. She suggests 'Journeys with the Prothean'." He shrugged again, his face a perfect combination of a sneer and a smirk.

"You'd do that?" Shepard asked for the second time in ten minutes.

"I will need a job. There will be no Reapers left to kill," he reasoned with an uncharacteristic chuckle. "Thank you, Commander... for letting the last voice of the Protheans speak. It has been a privilege."

"Same to you Javik," she said with a smile before going to have a short conversation with Wrex and then entering the command center. Anderson was busy with preparations so she moved to speak with Tali and EDI before addressing him.

"Almost time for the final push," Tali said, her voice brimming with excitement and fear. "Are you okay?"

"I thought I'd be asking you that question," she said with a chuckle.

"Shepard, I backed you when I was just a kid on her pilgrimage," Tali scoffed. "I backed you when the Normandy was a Cerberus ship. What kind of friend would I be if I didn't back you now? And you haven't answered my question. Are you okay?" she asked again.

"Remember how you felt when you landed on Rannoch? Now imagine it's not a story passed down by your people. Imagine you were there just a few months ago..."

"And now you're seeing it like this," Tali finished, sympathetically.

"We need to put it right," Shepard said with a nod.

"We will," Tali promised her. "Whatever happens, I'm proud to have served with you... Captain."

"It's been an honor, Tali'Zorah Vas Normandy," Shepard said, emphasizing her ship name to be certain Tali knew she saw her as family, just as the Quarians saw their ship mates as family.

"The admirals once hung that ship name on me like a badge of shame, and then the Normandy helped us reclaim our homeworld. It's time I returned the favor." Shepard did not need to see her face to hear the smile in her voice. Tali truly was one of her best friends, although she still would never call her plucky to her face and hope to survive the outcome.

She gripped Tali's shoulder and then smiled back. Then she got serious for a moment. "Listen, Tali, I have Kaidan on Garrus duty if this goes wrong, but I would also like to ask you to keep an eye on him. I think you're the closest thing he has to a friend outside of me..."

Tali raised a hand. "You don't need to ask Shepard. The last time you died he ended up taking a rocket to the face. I'll make sure he doesn't fall into another pit."

"Thank you, Tali," she said, sighing in relief. Then patted the shoulder she had been holding on to and stepped across the room to EDI.

As soon as she approached, EDI smiled and said, "Shepard, I have a question." All through her metamorphosis into the most human AI Shepard had ever seen, EDI had been opening their conversations often with that same phrase.

Shepard crossed her arms. "Is it a big or small one?"

"It is important," EDI said taking an at ease stance, her hands clasped behind her back. "It's relevance would be diminished at any other time."

"Ask away," Shepard waved a hand and smiled.

"In this battle, the Reapers have no reason not to use their full capabilities to destroy us. Their forces are in entrenched positions. They have superior firepower and out number our forces." Shepard hoped EDI would get to the point. "My question is, what makes you think we can reach the Conduit at all?"

Shepard glared at EDI, but she knew that she was most likely just concerned. If Shepard knew the odds were slim, EDI had to know exactly how hopeless their cause was. "The Reapers have the Citadel. They think they've won and that's the best time to hit them."

EDI frowned. "If they have spies or other intelligence, we lose the element of surprise. In such a case, we will likely lose."

Shepard thought she understood what was happening. "Are you afraid?" she asked simply.

"Our probability for success is greater than any other plan presented to date," EDI said, dancing around the answer.

Shepard wouldn't let her do that. "That's not what I asked. Are you afraid?"

"I do not understand the purpose of the question," EDI said, still avoiding her answer.

"There's no room for doubt anymore, EDI. You understand what we have to do, or you don't."

"I am clear on what we must accomplish, Shepard. The Reapers have destroyed thousands of civilizations..." She paused and looked away before her gaze again fell on Shepard and her look was one of determination. "But they have never destroyed ours. Nor will they!"

"Couldn't have put it better myself," Shepard said with a grin. "Time to move out."

"Shepard?" EDI stopped her from walking away. "There is something I want you to know..." Shepard stopped and returned her attention to EDI. "The Illusive Man ordered my creation years ago. Jeff was the one who allowed me to think for myself... But only now do I feel alive. That is _your_ influence."

"Thanks, EDI," Shepard said, her heart swelling as she realized that if they made it through this damned war, between Grunt, Jack and EDI, she was more than qualified to raise a child. It was something else to fight towards.

EDI went back to her console without another word and Shepard finally approached Anderson, her vigor renewed. They went over the Sitrep and she found out that with only about 50% of Hammer they were going to have to fight through No Man's Land and past a Reaper Destroyer to get to the beam. It felt like a suicide mission, but she had been there before. After dismissing the others, Anderson approached her. "Shepard, I'm sending you up the gut where the resistance is heaviest. Support the tanks the best you can, but stay alive. I need you for the final push to the beam. I'll give you a minute with your squad. Pick you team well." Anderson patted her back and left her alone.

The others stood toward the back of the room and she approached them solemnly, uncertain of what she was going to say. When they all turned to look at her, she smiled softly. "This war has brought us pain and suffering and loss." she took a moment to hang her head for the fallen before continuing. "But it's also brought us together... as soldiers, allies... _friends_. This bond that ties us together is something the Reapers will never understand. It's more powerful than any weapon, stronger than any ship. It can't be taken or destroyed... The next few hours will decide the fate of _everyone_ in the galaxy. Every mother. Every son. Every unborn child. They're trusting you... depending on you to win them their future. A future free from the threat of the Reapers. But take heart! Look around you. You're not in this fight alone. We face our enemy together... and together we _will_ defeat them." She took a ragged breath as she received nods all around. Her people were ready. She let out a deep sigh and said, "Now comes the hard part. I am taking two of you with me. We all work most effectively in a small group. The rest of you, I am sending back to the Normandy to stay safe in case we need back up." A lot of shuffling and unvoiced complaints followed her news. "I know you all want a piece of the action, but I need to know that I don't need to worry about the rest of you while I try like hell to keep myself alive."

"Well, we all know Scars is going with you," James said shortly. "Who is your second pick?"

Shepard sighed. "This isn't a popularity contest and I'm not questioning any of your abilities. I've fought beside each of you and you all can pull your weight, but I need another biotic at my back in case there are Banshees. Kaidan, I need you at my side. You have the most range not only in biotics, but your weapon's skills are unmatched." She glanced at Liara who bowed her head in consent, knowing that she was not nearly as good in a combat situation as Kaidan was. With her logic explained, all of the grumbling stopped. "There is a shuttle waiting for you all to take back to the Normandy."

"Good luck," Tali said softly and she and Liara were the first to leave.

Kaidan sniffed as he stepped up beside her. "That was a nice speech," he whispered.

She wrinkled her nose. "You don't think it sounded forced?"

He chuckled. "No, Shepard. It was exactly what everyone needed to hear."

She stood a little straighter at the praise as the others made their way to the shuttle that would take them to safety. "All right, boys. You ready?"

Garrus harrumphed. "I was born ready," he said.

"Then lets do this," she said with a grin, checking her ammo and making sure she grabbed some grenades from the supplies nearby. The modded grenades had worked wonders on Sanctuary they may as well repeat their success if the situation arose.

* * *

 

Their fight through the five city blocks, to where the rendezvous point for the tanks was, took almost three hours. No Man's Land was definitely an accurate name for the swatch of London. Reaper troops were everywhere and Hammer forces were dropping around them like flies. Things looked bad. When they reached the tanks that had been abandoned in the intersection of a street at the rendezvous, none of them had gotten out without injuries. Garrus limped lightly, favoring his right leg. There was blood seeping from a cut in his neck that he'd gotten from a Banshee that had gotten too close, and there was another gash on his left brow plate that he'd gotten dodging the fire of a Harvester. Kaidan had gotten a nosebleed after a Brute had tried to smash into him, his nose was swollen and she could tell it was broken. She had also had to pop his shoulder back into place after a husk jumped on his back and he'd had to wrestle free while it tried to claw his eyes out. This resulted in scratches all over his forehead and rips in his gloves where there was no extra armor. Shepard herself wrenched a knee and was limping right alongside Garrus. Her arm throbbed after she'd wrestled her own husk and it had bent her arm in the wrong angle almost breaking her forearm. She was bleeding from a few places too, but her medigel delivery system was working nicely since she'd reinstalled it and tweaked the amount of gel that hit an area based on the size and severity of the wound that she entered with a series of coded taps to the buttons on her palm interface. She guaranteed herself that she couldn't overdose. They dropped into the field from a building where they had just secured an apartment from a group of Reaper forces with a turret who were attacking their tanks as they attempted to pass. She hated their position. The street was wide open and there was sparse cover from the multiple directions that Reapers could attack from. Luckily, the Destroyer hadn't spotted them yet. The massive Reaper hovered by the beam, blocking their way as it shot at anything that moved.

They cleared the intersection as best they could and Shepard approached the nearest tank armed with missiles. The company that was meant to fire the missiles had been wiped out and Shepard got a transmission from Coats. "Commander, do you read me?"

"Major? What's the situation?" she answered as she studied the missile battery attached to the tank.

"The Beam's interfering with Missile guidance. We can hit the Destroyer, but we'll never make the precision shot we need to take it out," he informed her, drawing a curse from her lips.

"Damn it... EDI can you read me?" She called out.

"Yes, Commander," EDI purred over the comms.

"Any suggestions?"

"I _may_ be able to use the Normandy's systems to enhance the missile's targeting capabilities," the AI suggested.

"Excellent," Shepard said, giving the go ahead.

"I'll need you to open a link to the Normandy from the missile systems," she coached. Shepard fiddled with the firewall controls on the missiles and EDI said, "Got it... I'll let you know when I've adapted the targeting systems."

Anderson ordered them and what was left of Hammer to protect the missiles to buy them time. The Reapers made a push on their position, while they fought, their left flank fell and they were forced to back up so they didn't have Reapers coming up behind them. The Reapers were throwing everything they had at them, Marauders, husks, Cannibals, Banshees, Brutes and even a Harvester rained on their position. Shepard was glad for the grenades, modded or otherwise. They took chunks out of the larger troops while they painstakingly fired on the smaller troops, their ammo starting to run low in spite of the small backpack she had decided to carry full of thermal clips. Finally, EDI's voice purred over the comms and she made her way back to the tank. "Firing!" she shouted over the sound of the Destroyer's laser as Kaidan brought EDI up on his omnitool display.

"Countering interference," EDI announced as the missiles flew towards the Reaper.

"Did it hit?" Garrus asked hopefully as he watched their backs and couldn't see the action. They flew out and around the Reaper and exploded ineffectively into other sources.

Shepard's hopes dropped. "What happened?" she asked breathily.

"The Reaper is still too close to the beam," EDI said by way of apology.

"We're down to two missiles," Shepard said, seeing the last tank parked a few meters ahead across the intersection.

"And we haven't even scratched it," Kaidan said in dismay.

"You will need to allow the Reaper to move out of the beam's influence," EDI informed them before Kaidan closed his vid screen.

"And closer to us," Shepard realized.

"Commander," Anderson contacted her. "Hammer's being overrun at every turn. Reaper ground forces are converging on your location. We're fighting our way to you. Hold on, Commander... Hold on!"

"How can there be more of them?" Kaidan asked.

"Hold on, everyone. We can do this," she said, placing her hands on both their shoulders and them pulling out her pistol.

"We're about to find out. Here they come," Garrus announced from his about face position.

They held the line against so many Brutes, Marauders and Banshees that Shepard lost count. A Harvester landed in the middle of the intersection and proceeded to try and single her out while she grappled with a Brute. She thought she heard Garrus' heart attack as it fired on her and she swung down from the Brute's back and pulled it around to use as a meat shield. She then scurried out of the way and took cover from the fireballs. He soon dropped down beside her and asked after her injuries. "I'm no worse than I was five minutes ago," she quipped.

They modded a few grenades in the short reprieve while Kaidan distracted another Brute. Shepard tossed one of the grenades to get the Brute off his scent then they all converged on the Harvester, circling it so it had three distinct targets in three different directions. If it hunkered down to fire on one of them, it left itself vulnerable to attack from the other two. She was so preoccupied with the Harvester that she didn't see the Banshee coming until it lifted her up by the back of her armor. Her shout drew Garrus and Kaidan's attention. Just as the Banshee was about to skewer her on it's five inch talons, Kaidan shouted and threw a Reave at it, followed directly by a warp and a stasis field. The Banshee shrieked as it was smacked with the Reave, slowly draining it's barrier to power his biotics, Then the warp finished the job on the barrier, leaving it vulnerable for his stasis field. "Shepard!" Garrus cried as he watched her dangling helplessly from the frozen Banshee's upraised arm.

"Oh, my God, get me down from here!" she shouted as she got a look at the forces swarming in around them. Kaidan ran to her and dropped below her as Garrus took a head shot into the Banshee's face. The dead Reaper fell, dropping her from about 7 feet off the ground. She fell sloppily into Kaidan's waiting arms and before she could thank him, she had to shove him out of the way as the Harvester noticed they had moved. The fireball clipped her shields and broken glass sounded around her. "Shit!" she cursed, completely vulnerable as she brought up a barrier to protect herself and scurried for cover.

"Spirits! Shepard was that your shields?" Garrus called out.

"Yep," she grunted as she reloaded her shotgun, preparing for the convergence of troops she'd witnessed as she was suspended above the battlefield.

"Stay down! We'll finish the Harvester while you regen," he called out.

"Slight problem with that plan, Big Guy," she said, as the Brute nearby spotted her. "Do what you have to do. I'll handle myself. Take out that Harvester." She prepared for the Brute as it charged for her. Right before it collided with her, she was about to fire her shotgun when a sudden splitting pain ripped through her head and her nose started to bleed. As she cried out in pain, the Brute stopped and cocked it's head to regard her. She frowned and then realized it had a blank expression on it's face while it stared at her like it was waiting for orders. Through the fog of her screaming brain, she shooed the Brute dismissively. "Go... kill a few Banshees," she mumbled, dropping to her knees behind the cover as the Brute shuffled off presumably to do her bidding.

She heard the Harvester fall and moment's later, Garrus was at her side. "What the hell just happened, Shepard?"

"Leviathan," she gasped, remembering the intrusive feeling as she swiped the blood from her nose. She glanced up and saw her Brute pounding it's chest as it showed off against a Banshee. "Damned effective," she said. "We can't tell anyone that happened."

He frowned but nodded his head slowly as Kaidan came to kneel beside them. "Never a dull moment, Shepard," he chuckled.

"Thanks for the rescue," she said with a smile.

He scoffed. "You're no damsel, Shepard, but you're welcome."

Garrus nodded his own thanks as she dragged herself back to her feet and surveyed the battle ground. They had a moment to catch their breath and EDI chose then to contact them. "Commander! The destroyer is in range. Missiles are ready for launch!"

"Roger that, EDI," she said and headed in the relative quiet towards the tank with the missiles. The Reaper was right on top of them. Shepard craned her neck to look at the massive thing and fought the urge to stick her tongue out at it like a child. "Firing," she said as she slammed a fist down on the controls to the missiles.

She watched with her breath held as the two last hopes for humanity shot from their beds and flew for the Destroyer. They slipped inside it's casing just as the Destroyer closed it's front cover. She sighed in relief as the missiles exploded directly on the relatively small Reaper's firing chamber. It stumbled and fell, the red lightning fading much more quickly than it had on the one on Rannoch. "It's going down!" Coats called over the comms.

"Hit 'em with everything you've got!" She replied over an open channel so everyone could hear.

Several more explosions rocked the intersection. When the smoke cleared, EDI shouted in excitement. "Destroyer terminated!"

"Nice work, EDI," Shepard said, with a breathless chuckle. The area seemed cleared for the time being and the Reaper could no longer drop troops on them.

"Shepard. We're on our way to your location," Anderson informed her.

She nodded and rested her palms on her knees, letting Garrus keep the vigil he refused to give up on. Kaidan was nursing another bloody nose after his biotic exertions and she was exhausted. "Roger that."

Minutes later, a small group of Mako tanks appeared and stopped beside them. "Shepard, over here," Anderson drew her attention from the back of the pack. "Thank God you made it," he said with genuine relief.

"It didn't look good," she agreed as she approached him.

He moved past her to survey the dead Reaper. "It get's worse," he announced.

She chuckled wryly. "Of course it does."

"Hackett just reported in. Several Sovereign class Reapers, including Harbinger, have broken off from the battle with Sword. They're headed here."

"Harbinger?" Shepard asked in disbelief.

"It's an opportunity for Hackett to get the Crucible in place, but we have to get a team on board the Citadel to open those arms, now!"

"We still don't even know what we'll find when we get to the Citadel," Coats interrupted.

"Then that's our job," she shrugged. "Find out what we're up against."

Anderson nodded. "Alright. Saddle up, everybody." They all climbed into one of the upgraded Makos that were parked nearby and they set off toward the beam. Shepard forced herself to sit down. She was anxious to get this done. "From here on in, it's a straight shot to the beam," Anderson said.

"A straight shot with Reapers trying to crush us along the way," Coats mumbled.

Shepard had a moment to think what a bundle of joy he was before Anderson spoke again. "We just need to get a handful of troops through."

"That all?" Garrus asked sarcastically as he glanced around the small vehicle counting the five of them inside.

"We all knew this was going to be a gamble at best," Anderson sighed.

"I can't think of anyone else I'd rather do this with," she added, standing to relieve her nerves.

Everyone else stood, too. Garrus smiled and said, "Feels like this fight's always been ours to finish."

"We're in sight of the target," Coats announced after touching his private comm and listening to a report.

"All right, everyone. This is it," Anderson said. They had no chance to get ready before something rocked their Mako. Shepard immediately got up from the floor where she'd been thrown and jumped out of the tank to see what the damage was. Anderson was right on her tail. "Shit..." he cursed when they saw their Mako's front axle destroyed by a mine it had run over. Shepard looked ahead. The beam was two football fields away and Harbinger was landing behind it to stare menacingly at the ground that they had to cross to get there. "We've gotta move!" Anderson insisted.

She agreed, feeling exposed on the ridge they stood on. "Come on," she ordered and they all slid down to join the other tanks and soldiers on foot. She had never run so fast in her life. She felt like no matter how fast she ran, the beam was still so far away. Her injured knee screamed for relief and her breath panted out of her in foggy puffs as it met the freezing air. She felt like she was back in the forest from her dreams except instead of dodging the spirits of the dead, she was dodging red laser fire from Harbinger. The beams and Harbinger's aim was getting closer as they got closer. Literally a few feet from her left, the laser fire touched down and she felt the heat from it as the ground shook and she stumbled. Garrus and Kaidan ran right behind her as she got back to her feet. Before she could run any further, she was forced back to the ground to duck under a Mako that had been hit by Harbinger and flew over her head. Everything was exploding around her, but for a split second she only had eyes for Garrus and Kaidan as the Mako rolled over her and landed right where they had been seconds ago. She cried out in fear and it exploded. She backtracked, jumping over the wreckage to check on her boys. Kaidan was on his knees, clearly injured, but he waved her off and then she glanced frantically around for Garrus. Her heart was in her throat. Where was he? Finally her eyes fell on him as he struggled to stand. She ran to his side and helped him to stand. For the second time in her life, she watched the right side of his face bleeding as she dragged him to a paltry cover behind the burning wreckage. Kaidan joined them, panting and clutching his side. She patted small fires out on Garrus' armor and groped for her dextro medigel supply. As she worked, she opened her comm. "Normandy, do you copy. I need an evac! Right now!"

"We're taking heavy losses up here, Commander," Joker said over the fuzzy connection. "On our way," he finished.

She waited, desperately working to staunch the worst of the bleeding. Within moments, the Normandy appeared over the field and dropped in front of her, the hatch opened. She helped Garrus to his feet and they ran for the Normandy. Kaidan was right beside her. They got to about halfway up the ramp when she stopped. "Here, take him..." she said to Kaidan.

As she passed her burden to Kaidan, Garrus hummed. "Shepard..."

"You gotta get out of here," she said, already backing away and heading for the battle field. She couldn't stop. They needed her to finish this.

"And you've got to be kidding me," he growled, trying to pull away from Kaidan.

She sighed and walked back up to stand in front of him so he wouldn't struggle anymore. "Don't argue, Big Guy."

"We're in this 'til the end," he insisted.

She swallowed her fear and stepped as close as she could get to him, talking as she moved. "No matter what happens here, you know I love you... I always will."

He paused in his struggle against Kaidan and his mandibles sagged in defeat. She gently touched his undamaged cheek and rubbed a fleck of blood from his clan markings. "Shepard... I..." he took a deep breath and his subharmonics keened desperately. As he leaned his face into her touch he said. "I love you, too."

His words almost made her turn her back on humanity. He'd never said it out loud. She'd heard it under his voice in his subvocals, but never had he actually admitted he loved her. Her stomach clenched and she backed away. His arm outstretched as if he wanted to pull her back to him, but she set her emotions on the back burner and shouted. "Go!"

Then she turned away, unable to watch him let her go. Her heart broke a hundred times as she mechanically dodged the laser fire and the Normandy took off and carried everyone she loved to safety. How she wished she could have gone with them, but someone had to stop the Reapers. There were so few left now as Harbinger took their allies down left and right.

She dodged left and right and as she rolled out of the way of a third laser, she stood up and the fourth was undodgeable. It hit the ground in front of her, inches from her face. The bright flash of light and the sweltering heat from the death ray hit her and she stumbled backwards, her armor melting away from her body. She fell to the ground and the shock hit her, as her head hit the ground hard. " _Were we just shot by a Reaper?_ " Garrus' voice from back on Tuchanka echoed in her head and she let out a babbling chuckle as she momentarily lost consciousness. When she opened her eyes again, she was the only one around. Every other Allied Force had been taken out in her vicinity. She watched Harbinger taking off, thinking it's job was finished. She weakly lifted her hand and flipped it off as she scanned her surroundings for a weapon. Hers were damaged beyond repair. Conveniently enough, there was a stray pistol lying a few feet from her and she grasped at it, picking up snippets of conversation between Coats and another marine over her comm. She had no breath to answer, so instead, she focused on getting to her feet. The armor on her left arm was melted away from the middle of her bicep down, and the skin was scorched like a mild sunburn. She must have used that arm to shield her eyes as the laser hit. The other arm was missing armor from the elbow down, but her skin was surprisingly untouched. Her right arm dangled by her side as the weight of the pistol was almost too much to bear. The rest of her armor looked like a blackened charcoal briquette. Her medigel delivery system was no longer functioning and her head was screaming from the nice little crack she had sustained as she fell. She used her burnt arm to clutch her side as her body complained of potentially broken ribs. Her vision had a ring of black surrounding it and she wondered if her cybernetics had been damaged in the heat. She blinked furiously, but the black halo persisted.

She took one step and then another, dragging herself past a dying soldier who reached out to her as he took his last breath. Her limbs barely supported her, but she pushed ahead. She was but a few feet from the beam. Suddenly out of nowhere, a Marauder came from around one of the towers that surrounded the beam and fired on her. She felt the bullet rip through her gut, exiting out the back and she nearly fell to her knees. Instead, she lifted the pistol as best she could and fired, each shot jarring her body and wracking her with pain. After three head shots, the Marauder fell. She clutched the gunshot wound and pushed forward, limping and groaning the whole way.

* * *

 

She lost time when she passed through the beam. Goodness knew how long it had been, but she was jerked back to consciousness by a voice in her head. No, not her head. It was her comm. "Shepard!" The first thing that came to her was that she tasted blood. The second was that it was dark and whatever ground she was lying on was warm. She had not fallen on Earth. Earth was cold. "Shepard!"

She pushed herself onto her knees and grunted, she had to keep going. "Anderson?" she said, finally recognizing the voice. She made it off her hands and her body tried to fight her. She swallowed some metallic tasting blood and said, "You up here, too?"

She crawled to the pistol that was lying by where her hand had been and picked it up before forcing herself to her feet. "Followed you up, but we didn't come out the same place... at least I don't think we did. What's your surrounding look like?" He sounded unharmed and she breathed a sigh of relief as she took in the area where she had landed. It smelled like death and it didn't look much better. Keepers scuttled about foraging all of the dead bodies that were piled along the walls. The lighting was dim and red and she could barely see, although the black ring was gone. She took a few steps and gritted her teeth against the pain that coursed through her entire body. Her cries of pain escaped her lips unbidden. She took a breath to center herself and tried again. "You okay?" Anderson's voice came through concerned.

"I feel like death... but I'm moving," she admitted, dragging her almost limp limbs down the corridor. "It's dark... There's human remains scattered," she reported as she shuffled along.

"Sounds familiar," Anderson said wryly. "I'm in a dark hallway... Reminds me of your description of the Collector base."

She sighed, stopping to take a breath. "Makes sense."

"You think they're making a Reaper in here?" he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

She clutched at her shoulder that held the gun, believing that it was partially dislocated. "Sure. They round them up on Earth, then send the people up here to be processed."

"God damn abomination," he cursed as she started forward again. "I'm going to keep moving. The sooner we blow these bastards back to hell, the better." He mumbled as he moved, helping her focus on her own two feet. One in front of the other. Don't stop. "The tubes don't go on forever, but where the hell are we?"

"Yeah," she agreed shakily. "Doesn't look like any part of the Citadel I've been to."

She got about halfway down her hallway when he spoke again. "Whoa..."

"Anderson?" she asked, needing an update.

"One of the walls here just realigned itself. The place is shifting, changing," he reported. "There's a chasm here... and more hallways like the one I was in."

"I think I'm near an exit," she sighed as the wall in front of her shifted like he had said his did. It opened up into a brightly lit area that indeed looked like a chasm. There were still bodies strewn all over the place and she picked her footing carefully as she shuffled across a bridge over the chasm.

"I see something up ahead. Might be a way to cross over."

"Don't get too far ahead of me," she pleaded, as the path took her down a sharp decline across the chasm and then started back up.

"Hold on. I see something. A control panel maybe," he informed her as she struggled to climb the steep incline, leaving a bloody trail as she dragged her leg behind her. She imagined she probably looked like a zombie from one of the old Earth vids, shuffling along, bloody and hunting for brains to eat. "I'm just going to go ahead and check..." her radio hissed and his voice went silent.

"Anderson?" she tried to get him back, but when he didn't answer, she cursed her slowness. "Damn it!" She moved as fast as her damaged body would carry her. She crested the hill and it opened out into an enormous, circular room that sparkled with lights that to her resembled computer code. She moved to a rounded dais that extended out over the room where Anderson stood in front of the control panel he had mentioned. She called his name as she approached.

He turned to her, struggling with his footing as if his body was fighting itself. "Shepard..." he said desperately. "I can't..."

As she struggled to comprehend what had happened to Anderson so quickly, she heard a voice from behind her and she closed her eyes in defeat. "I underestimated you, Shepard."

Her mind screamed as she felt control of her body being taken from her. She gritted her teeth as the Illusive Man passed by her to stand between her and Anderson. "What have..." she tried to speak, but her voice was grabbed from her throat and silenced as he glanced at her. His face was a mangled mess of wires and cybernetics. Nothing of the original man remained, save his eerie glowing geometric eyes. He had undergone extensive surgery. She had found a log mentioning procedures, but she had no idea he meant something like this.

As he spoke, black tendrils of control snaked through her vision as her mind tried to fight his compulsion. "I warned you. Control is the means to survival. Control of the Reapers... and of _you_ if necessary."

Anderson grunted and said, "They're controlling _you_!" His voice was forced and ragged.

"I don't think so, Admiral," The Illusive Man said with a smirk.

She felt her throat release and she choked out a response in the time she had before he tried to take it away again. "Controlling me is a lot different than controlling a Reaper," she spat.

"Have a little faith," he said cockily. "When humanity discovered the mass relays... when we learned there was more to the galaxy than we imagined... there were some who thought the relays should be destroyed. They were scared of what we might find. Terrified of what we might let in... But look at what humanity has achieved. Since that discovery, we've advanced more than the past 10,000 years combined. And the Reapers will do the same for us again, a thousand fold. But..." he paused and the black tendrils returned. She felt her arm lift that held the pistol and it aimed at Anderson. "Only if we can harness their ability to control."

"Bullshit!" Anderson growled as he realized what the Illusive Man was up to. "We destroy them, or they destroy us."

"And waste this opportunity? Never," he replied as her arm shuddered under the weight of the gun but no matter how hard she tried, her limb would not obey her.

"You're playing with things you don't understand. With power you shouldn't be able to use," she spat angrily.

"I... don't believe that. If we can control it, why shouldn't it be ours?" he asked, his wavering confidence obvious in the first few words.

"Because... we're not ready," she pointed out.

"No. This is the way humanity must evolve," he insisted.

"There's always another way," Anderson said, his head flopping back and forth as he tried to shake it in denial.

"I've dedicated my life to understanding the Reapers and I know with certainty the Crucible will allow me to control them."

"And then what?" she asked, beyond listening to his idiocy.

"Look at the power they wield. Look at what they can do!" The black tendril returned to snake across her vision and her finger twitched over the trigger as she tried to fight. A single bang resounded as she pulled the trigger and shot Anderson in the gut. He flinched and grunted, but did not fall, the Illusive Man still holding him aloft.

She shook her head in shame at not being strong enough to fight his compulsion. "I see what they did to you."

"I took what I wanted from them. Made it my own," he ranted. "This isn't about me or you. It's about things so much bigger than all of us."

"He's wrong," Anderson pleaded. "Don't listen to him."

"And who will you listen to, Shepard? An old soldier, stuck in his ways, only able to see the world down the barrel of a gun? And what if he's wrong? What if controlling the Reapers is the answer?" He sounded now like he was trying to convince himself more than her.

"If we destroy the Reapers, this ends today. But if you can't control them..."

He cut her off, his voice shaky and desperate. "But I can!"

"Are you willing to bet humanity's existence on it?" she asked, reasserting her own will over his as he began to spiral.

"I... Know... It will work!" he shouted, clutching his head as he attempted to shake her seed of doubt that she had planted.

"You can't, can you? They won't let you do it," she guessed, feeling her body start to return to her.

"No! I'm in control! No one is telling me what to do!" he shouted, his will cracking the whip on her hard earned freedom.

"Listen to yourself..." Anderson sighed, his voice ragged. "You're... indoctrinated."

"No. No! The two of you, so self righteous. Do you think power like this comes easy? There are sacrifices!" he said as his control wavered again.

"You sacrificed too much," she accused, a sneer curling her lip as she looked over his face that no longer even resembled a human.

"Shepard, I... I only wanted to protect humanity. The Crucible can control them. I know it can. I just..." his hands began to wring together and she felt a pang of pity for him as she had for Saren. The Reapers had him right where they wanted him and he had no idea.

"It's not too late," she said softly. "Let us go. We'll do the rest."

"I... I can't do that, Commander," he said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Of course you can't," Anderson chimed in. "They own you now."

The Illusive Man walked up behind Anderson and took the pistol from his belt. "You... you'd undo everything I've accomplished. I won't let that happen."

"Because of you humanity is already undone," she sighed as he held the pistol limp in his hand.

"That's not true!" he shouted, brandishing the pistol and making her flinch.

"They have the Citadel! They've got us fighting each other instead of fighting them!" she shouted, not knowing she had that much energy left in her.

"I just need to..."

"You've done exactly what the Reapers wanted! You're still doing it because _they_ control _you_!"

"I... they're too strong..." he muttered as he clutched at his head.

"You're stronger! Don't let them win. Break their hold. Don't let them control you," she begged.

"I tried, Shepard," he said, his voice a cracking waver. He seemed to fight an inner battle before lifting the pistol to his temple and pulling the trigger, just as Saren had. His hold on her dripped away and she fought to remain standing even as Anderson fell to the ground before her. She shuffled to the console and with one hand called up the program to open the Citadel's arms.

She leaned heavily on the console as the arms opened around her. She gazed out on the battle raging outside. Everything was so quiet from in there. Anderson grunted as he drug himself into a sitting position, his back against the raised middle of the dais where they stood. She turned and limped over to him as the arms continued to open wider to accommodate the Crucible. "That's it, the Crucible is docked," she heard softly over her comm as Hackett announced the feat.

Shepard dropped painfully beside Anderson, watching blood dripping from the corner of his lip. She could still taste her own blood and she could no longer feel the hole in her side. Shock was setting in she supposed as they watched the war going on outside. "Commander," Anderson addressed her softly.

"We did it," she said with a gentle smile.

"Yes, we did... It's, uh... quite a view," he said with a pained chuckle.

She chuckled herself, a small stabbing pain reminding her that she had a broken rib or two. "Best seats in the house."

"God... feels like years since I just... sat down," he sighed.

"I think you earned a rest," she was going to pat his leg, but her arm wouldn't move. He grunted an amused agreement. "Stay with me," she begged. "We're almost through this."

"You did good, child. You did good. I'm proud of you," he said, a deep sigh escaping his lips.

She turned her head to glance at him and his head was lowered and she couldn't see his face under the brim of his cap. "Thank you, sir." When he didn't respond, she made another attempt, her own voice fading. "Anderson?"

He was gone. Shepard closed her eyes and blinked back tears. Her body needed all of the fluid it could retain. Shedding tears was for recovery time. She looked down at her hand that was pressed against her bleeding gunshot wound. The hand when she pulled it away from the wound was completely covered in fresh blood that hadn't even had time to get sticky. She was bleeding out. Without medigel to stop the bleeding, she didn't have long. "Shepard!" a voice called to her. "Commander!"

She jerked back to herself as Hackett's voice registered. "I... what do you need me to do?" Hackett always needed something.

"Nothing's happening," he said as she attempted to get back to her feet to get to the console. She fell back down, no strength left in her limbs. "The Crucible's not firing!" She dragged herself along the floor, determined that if it took her last breath, she was going to make this work. "It's got to be something on your end." She managed to get to her hands and knees, her palms leaving bloody prints in her wake. "Commander Shepard!" Hackett sounded concerned.

"I don't see. I'm not sure how to..." she reached in vain for the console that was way too far away. Her vision wavered and she dropped to the floor again, the last thing she remembered was her cheek hitting the floor.

* * *

 

"Wake up!"

Shepard gasped. All of her pain returned to her and she groaned. She lifted her head to see who had spoken. The voice was high and familiar. She pushed herself to her hands and knees, the struggle nearly taking her breath away. After catching her breath, she glanced around. Kneeling directly in front of her was an image of the little boy who haunted her dreams. He seemed to be constructed of a collection of energy, partially transparent, his face expressionless. The sight of him startled her and she scrambled to her feet. Where was she? She was no longer in the rounded room from before. Anderson was gone, as was they body of the Illusive Man. Behind the boy was a long stretch of metal walkway that ended in a beam of energy that resembled the beam she had arrived on the Citadel through. Towards the end of the walkway the path diverged in two other directions. To the right was a power node surrounded in glass that glowed a soft red. To the left was a pair of upraised power connections that sparked with bright white arcs of electricity that waited for a solid connection. All around them, there were no walls. The battle for Earth still raged around them but the place was silent as the dead. She looked back at the boy and blinked. It was funny, she didn't remember death being quite so dramatic the last time around.

"What?... Where am I?" she panted, her breath short.

"The Citadel. It's my home," the boy said, getting to his feet.

After glancing around once more, trying to figure out exactly what was happening she said, "Who are you?"

"I am the Catalyst..." the boy said, matter-of-factly.

"I thought the Citadel was the Catalyst," she sighed. Her brain was not quite capable of much higher thought at the moment than, 'light pretty, fire bad.' She needed help and this being was talking riddles.

"No. The Citadel is part of me."

"I need to stop the Reapers. Do you know how I can do that?" she asked softly, amazed that she was even still standing.

"Perhaps. I control the Reapers. They are my solution." He turned and walked away from her toward the end of the walkway.

She painstakingly dragged her zombie feet after him, her side screaming with each step she took. "Solution? To what?"

"Chaos," the boy said simply, barely turning his head to glance at her as he continued to walk down the long path. "The created will always rebel against their creators, but we found a way to stop that from happening. A way to restore order."

"By wiping out organic life?" she asked hatefully. She didn't understand.

"No." He turned finally to regard her. "We harvest advanced civilizations, leaving the younger ones alone." He turned and began to walk again. "Just as we left your people alive the last time we were here."

"But you killed the rest!" she tried to shout, but it came out a threatening whisper.

"We helped them ascend so they could make way for new life." He spread his small arms wide to present one of the Reapers as it flew silently by in space. "Storing the old life in Reaper form."

"I think we'd rather keep our own form," she growled through gritted teeth.

"No, you can't... Without us to stop it, synthetics would destroy all organics. We've created the cycles so that never happens. That's the solution."

"But you're taking away our future," she pointed out. "Without a future, we have no hope. Without hope, we may as well be machines, programmed to do what we're told."

"You have hope. More than you think. The fact that you are standing here. The first organic ever, proves it. But it also proves my solution won't work anymore."

"So now what?" she asked.

"We find a new solution." The boy looked away from her to glance at the extensions before them.

"Why are you telling me this?" Her curiosity was piqued. She may have been dying, but what he was telling her was too complex for her subconscious to have made up. It had to have a purpose. "Why help me?"

The boy cocked his head and said, "You have altered the variables."

"What do you mean?" his riddles and circular talk was making her head spin. She felt her legs shaking under her weight. All she wanted was to sit down.

"The Crucible changed me. Created new... possibilities. But _I_ can't make them happen. If there is to be a new solution, you must act. It is now in your power to _destroy_ us." He turned his attention to the node surrounded in glass. In her mind, she saw a vision of the now dead Anderson walking up to the node and shooting the glass out then blowing up the node. She shook her head as the white of the fire encompassed her vision. When she opened her eyes, she was looking back at the boy. "But be warned, others will be destroyed as well. The Crucible will not discriminate. _All_ synthetics will be targeted. Even _you_ are partly synthetic."

"What exactly will happen?" she asked carefully. There was no reason to put EDI or the Geth or even herself at risk if she could help it.

"Your Crucible device appears to be largely intact. However, the effect of the blast will not be constrained to the Reapers. Technology you rely on will be effected, but those who survive should have little difficulty repairing the damage. There will still be losses, but no more than what has already been lost."

"But the Reapers will be destroyed?" she made certain.

"Yes, but the peace won't last. Soon, your children will create synthetics and then the chaos will come back," the boy warned.

"There has to be another way," she pleaded, not wanting to sacrifice so much.

"There is..." The boy turned to the left and waved toward the two sparking connections. "You could instead use the energy of the Crucible to seize _control_ of the Reapers." Again a vision interrupted her thoughts. She saw the Illusive Man grabbing hold of the connections so that the electricity sparked through him and outwards to encompass the entire area.

"So..." she sighed as her sight returned. "The Illusive Man was right after all."

"Yes, but he could never have taken control. Because _we_ already controlled him."

"But I can?" she asked with a new hope.

"You will die. You will control us, but you will lose everything you have." He warned. Her stomach sunk.

"How can I control the Reapers if I'm dead?" she asked.

"Your corporeal form will be dissolved but your thoughts and even your memories would continue. Your connection to your kind will be lost, but you will remain aware of their existence."

How could she bear that type of pain? Forever knowing Garrus was still out there, but unable to see him or touch him. Knowing that he thought her dead. It was a sentence worse than death. Her options so far were terrible choices. "But the Reapers will obey me?" she asked softly.

"Yes, we will be yours to control and direct as you see fit."

"Hmm," she grunted, her mind racing as she weighed every variable.

"There is another solution," the boy informed her, glancing forward to the beam of light. " _Synthesis_."

"And that is?" she was almost afraid to ask.

"Add your energy to the Crucible. The chain reaction will combine all synthetic and organic life into a new framework. A new DNA."

"Explain how my energy can be added to the Crucible," she demanded.

"Your organic energy, the essence of who and what you are will be broken down and then dispersed."

More death for her. "To do what exactly?"

"The energy of the Crucible, released in this way, will alter the matrix of all organic life in the galaxy. Organics seek perfection through technology. Synthetics seek perfection through understanding. Organics will be perfected by integrating fully with synthetic technology. Synthetics, in turn, will finally have full understanding of organics. It is the ideal solution. Now that we know it is possible, it is inevitable we will reach synthesis."

"Why couldn't you do it sooner?"

"We have tried a similar solution in the past, but it has always failed."

"Why?"

"Because the organics were not ready. It is not something that can be... forced. _You_ are ready and you may choose it."

She struggled. Nothing about this felt right, but she had to do something. "I... don't know..."

"Why not? Synthetics are already part of you. Could you imagine your life without them?"

"And there will be peace?" That was what was important.

"The cycle will end. The Reapers will cease their Harvest and the civilizations preserved in their forms will be connected to all of us. Synthesis is the final evolution of _all_ life. The paths are open, but _you_ have to choose."

The boy backed away and left her to her turmoil. She forced her mind to function and to sort the data as it was given. Two of the solutions guaranteed her own death. The third guaranteed the deaths of some of her loved ones, and possibly her own. The thing that gave her pause was something the boy had said. ' _but those who survive should have little difficulty repairing the damage._ ' There were experts on Geth and if her friends put their minds together, she had no reason to believe they would not be able to repair EDI if something terrible should happen. If she survived, she would personally add her technical expertise to the cause. Her other options had no guarantee that there would be peace. If she died for the cause and the 'solutions' didn't work it would all be for nothing. She had too much to live for. She had said it before at the Collector base. 'I will not let fear compromise who I am'. She had been fighting this whole war to destroy the Reapers. No reason to back down now. She squeezed her hand around the pistol she had tucked in her waistband and lifted it. Her broken body lurched forward. And she pushed ahead. Veering to the right, she climbed the short incline to the glass enclosed node.

As she fired into the resistant glass, she remembered those who made this possible. Anderson, his face before her was smiling, carefree and kind as she remembered him from before the war. EDI, her head cocked as she listened intently to even the smallest piece of advice to make herself more human. Garrus, hefting his Widow and his mandibles spread wide in a smile. She found a new strength as the glass shattered around the conduit. She lifted the pistol higher, her second arm reaching up to join the other in a two handed grip. Her legs surged forward and she gritted her teeth as the thing began to explode around her. It was over. She was done. Now to rest.

 


	39. Destruction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The weight of Shepard's decision falls on the Galaxy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Figuring out new and fun things for our protagonists to get into was always my goal from the beginning of this story. With the actual gameplay portion finished, it is now time to tell my canon future for Shepard.

His thoughts were sluggish and his mouth felt full of cotton. There was somewhere he was meant to be, but he was having trouble getting out of bed. He reached to his left for that comforting weight of his mate, but she wasn't there. He frowned and it hurt when his plates shifted against his skin. There was a ruckus happening around him and he forced his eyes open. He blinked and his mandibles twitched with curiosity. Traynor and Liara were supporting EDI between them. The AI's body was limp and Joker was hovering behind them. "What the hell happened up there?" Kaidan asked, drawing his attention to the bed beside his.

The human stood from the bed, his chest bare save for a tight wrapping of bandages around his rib-cage. He limped toward the cluster of people and attempted to lend his help with EDI. "She just... dropped." Traynor said sadly as they dragged EDI into the AI core, disappearing.

Garrus forced himself to sit up and then the truth hit him. He'd been sedated. After communications between Shepard and the fleet had been cut off, they had thought her dead and he'd lost it trying to get to the shuttle bay and take the spare Kodiak to get to her. Chakwas had gotten to him first while James held him down. He sat up and no one was there. Glancing at the AI core, he saw that everyone was busy with EDI and not a drop of attention was being paid to him. He pushed his aching body off the bed and turned to escape the med bay. He had to find Shepard. Before he got past the foot of his bed, he nearly bumped into a furious Quarian. "I don't think so," she mumbled, blocking his path.

He growled at Tali and lifted an arm to gently push her out of his path, but she wasn't budging. "Tali, where is Shepard?"

The Quarian remained in her place but she fidgeted. He knew her well enough to know that the answer she had was not the one he wanted. "We... we don't know Garrus. When the Crucible fired, we had to get out of the system. There was no time. Whatever Shepard did...."

"We need to find her. Where are we? Where's the nearest relay?" He insisted.

"We don't know!" she said firmly, a hand on his chest still blocking him from leaving. "While we were fleeing the Crucible, the energy caught up with us. Whatever Shepard did, the Crucible's fire power was enough to encompass the entire galaxy. When it hit the Normandy, the ship died. It was all Joker could do to get us where we are and crash here. QEC's are down and EDI is unresponsive. Even the Geth in my suit has shut down."

He paused, listening to the sorrow in her voice. He glanced behind him toward the AI core and sighed. "Is there anything I can do?"

Her head cocked to regard him before her hand slipped down from his chest and she sighed as well. "I don't know. Adams, Gabby, and Ken are trying to get the Eezo core to respond, but they sent me up here to see if I could help with EDI."

"You are our resident AI expert," he said, stepping aside to gesture her toward the core.

Tali passed by him and gave him a pat before entering the core and shooing Chakwas, Joker, and Kaidan. Chakwas tsked when she saw him up, but he held up his hands to show he wasn't going anywhere. Kaidan sighed and picked up a shirt that was lying on the bed he'd been in. The man was stoic. Even more so than usual. "How are you feeling?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

Joker pushed past everyone and he smelled of fear and sorrow as he turned toward the Port Observation where the bar was housed. Garrus watched him go, feeling like he needed a drink himself. He should have been with her. Should have been by her side. Now she was alone and possibly... No he couldn't think that. He'd given her an order. She'd come back to him. "Like I need a new face... again," he cringed. When Kaidan didn't so much as chuckle, Garrus' eyes narrowed. "What did I miss?"

Kaidan glanced up from the floor which had become very interesting in the last few seconds. "Listen, Garrus. When the Crucible fired, it gave off a _lot_ of energy. Joker tried to outrun it, but it was too fast. We made it about three jumps before it caught up to us. Before we left Sol, I saw what happened to the Citadel. There wasn't much left. If Shepard was still..."

Garrus cut him off. "What exactly are you saying, Major?"

Kaidan sighed again, his hand slipping inside his right pocket in his pants. "Shepard is presumed... dead." He choked out the word like it tasted like bile. After a few deep breaths and his eyes blinking rapidly, he continued, pulling his hand back out to reveal a folded over piece of paper. "Back on Earth, when we spoke, she asked me to give you this in case the worst were to happen."

Kaidan held the paper out to him, a single tear slipping down his cheek. Garrus took it and turned it over and over in his fingers. "What is it?"

"She called it a contingency plan." Kaidan shrugged. "I didn't read it."

He closed the paper up in his fist and his subharmonics started to keen. That damned woman had gone in expecting to die. Liara emerged from the AI core, her expression almost as stoic as Kaidan's. In spite of her facade, Garrus knew the Asari felt deeply for Shepard. "Garrus, you're up," she said, her surprise evident.

"What is happening with EDI?" he asked.

Liara shrugged and then hugged herself. "Her systems have all shut down, as has the Geth consciousness in Tali's suit. Whatever Shepard did, it seems to have wiped out all synthetic life."

"What about Glyph?" Garrus hummed thoughtfully. He was running on pure denial. If he accepted the keening in his throat, he would be of no help.

Liara's eyes bugged out of her head. "I don't know." She pushed past them and hurried toward her room. Garrus followed behind and Kaidan limped beside him. When she opened her door, the room was dark. "Goddess," she breathed. Then she dropped into a chair in front of a console and began to peck away at the keys. "The entire network is cut off." She sighed. "Now I know what I'll be spending my time doing while the engineers work on getting the ship running."

"We need to get Communications back up. We are blind until then," Garrus patted Liara's shoulder, believing that the Shadow Broker would not let him down. As she set to work, he glanced at Kaidan who was leaning heavily on the doorway. "Get some rest, Kaidan. We're going to need you."

Kaidan's eyes narrowed, but Garrus reassured him with the move he'd seen Shepard use so many times before. A gentle squeeze of the shoulder and a smile. When Kaidan had disappeared back into the medbay, Garrus sighed heavily and slumped against the wall himself. His side ached where the armor had burned through to his skin and his other injuries were compelling him to sit down. Liara cleared her throat, drawing his attention. "That is good advice, Garrus. We are all mourning, but I know better than anyone what Shepard and you meant to each other. You should take some time while we're stranded here to gather your thoughts."

His denial reasserted itself and he pretended to agree. "I'll be upstairs if you need me," he said, his injured leg complaining when he set his weight on it. He limped to the elevator and went up to Shepard's room. The room was quiet. Abnormally so. He was so used to Shepard's presence filling the space that her absence left a hole. The note she'd left him burned in his still clenched fist as he glanced around. The fish tank was still lit, but the VI's red light was out. Ferguson's cage had fallen to the floor and the hamster looked up at him with wide eyes from the unbreakable glass. He knelt gingerly and picked up the frightened animal's cage and placed it back on the shelf. "Looks like it's just me and you," he sighed as the Hamster placed it's tiny paws on the glass and cocked it's head at him, it's tiny nose sniffing wildly. He turned to regard Nibbler and saw that the husk head had gone inert. It was sagging to the side and it's eyes were closed. Upon further inspection, the head was dead. For good this time. He ignored it, hoping that the death of the husk remains meant the death of all of the Reapers. It was killing him not knowing what was going on or where they were, or whether they were safe. He limped further into her living area and the remnants of Shepard's touch made his chest hurt. She had clothes strewn everywhere, and bits of modded armor for every occasion threatened to trip him. Her tinkering table was full of unfinished projects and the data pads she'd been buried in for weeks were all over the bed and couch. It was like the woman didn't know what a table was. The two wine glasses that she kept on her coffee table had fallen over in the crash and one had shattered. He knelt and picked up the pieces, carefully making sure he got every tiny sliver. Everything else he left as it was. She had always scolded him for picking up her things. She called it her organized mess and who was he to change anything? He sat in the chair he'd sat in after their last night together and unfolded the note.

He'd never actually seen Shepard's handwriting. It was curly and smooth, more clean than he'd expected. He'd thought with as quickly as she typed or tinkered with things that her handwriting might be as rushed, but she had clearly taken her time on the note. He ran his finger tips over the looping letters and sighed. His translator set to work, struggling through the handwritten note and he wished he'd learned to read or even speak her language. That was something he was going to rectify.

_Hey there Big Guy,_

_If this made it to your hands, then I'm either dead, or we're sharing a bottle of whatever amino neutral booze we can find in this war torn galaxy and laughing at how silly I was to think I wouldn't survive. The most likely case is that yes, I am dead... again. Before you go off and get yourself killed, I have a few requests. The Normandy needs you. You are the closest thing I have to a second in command and I am trusting you with my ship. I know that you're hurting right now, but I need you to be strong for the others. I have set up an emergency fail-safe in the systems. If I don't report back with a code within three days, my orders will be relayed to the crew. They will follow you._

_Secondly, if the Reapers are still ravaging the galaxy, never stop fighting. Don't make my death in vain. Have Liara set her contingency in place. She'll know what I mean._

_Last thing. I love you Garrus... more than I've ever loved anyone. I know, in spite of your insistence on not saying it out loud, that you love me too. I don't need your words to feel it in your touch. Promise me, Big Guy, that you will live your life. No more Archangel vigilante crap. I almost lost you once and I don't want to spend my afterlife watching you rushing towards an early grave._

_I guess that's all there is to say. I should go._

_All my love, Shepard_

His hands were trembling. After everything she'd promised him, she had seen this coming. The keening in his chest threatened to boil over into his throat. She seemed to believe she was going to die, but he refused to let her go. Until he saw her corpse for himself, there was hope. If she was trusting him to keep the Normandy functioning, damned if he would let her down. He would get back to her.

* * *

 

Her eyes jerked open, a throbbing pain wracking her forehead. Her startled intake of breath as she left the dream drew a groan from her partner. He reached over, his arm encircling her as he touched his lips gently to her shoulder. "Everything all right, Ann?"

The voice and arms were familiar, but they were wrong. Even her name from his lips sounded strange. She moved to sit up and he helpfully placed a hand on her back to push her up. "Fine," she whispered. "Just a nightmare, I guess." She rubbed her eyes and her bladder complained.

He rubbed her back gently. "The doctors mentioned that might happen if you ate a big meal before bed."

"Yeah," she agreed, still a bit groggy. "That was one hell of a dream."

She stood and stretched, her back joining her bladder in complaining as her unnatural center of gravity settled and the baby rolled inside her womb. She turned to smile at her husband of two years. He was a hard worker. He had helped her father to drag their farm out of the dirt when he'd gotten sick and couldn't handle all of the work on his own anymore. Kaidan was a good man and a loving person, but when she looked into his honey brown eyes, she couldn't help but feel like they were supposed to be blue. She shook off the odd feeling and shuffled toward the bathroom.

After relieving herself, she stood and glanced in the mirror. Something struck her as wrong. The longer she stared, the more something bothered her. Her headache continued to pound in her skull and she pressed her finger tips to her temples and that is when it hit her. Her hair was too long and the bangs were covering something. She lifted up her bangs and saw a bloody gash that immediately began dripping blood down her cheek. She panicked and looked down to turn on the sink and grab a towel to staunch the bleeding. When she looked up again, the gash was gone. "What the fuck?" she whispered to herself, probing the area with her fingers. Her nails were painted an awful pink and she questioned what she'd been thinking when she had gotten that manicure a few days ago. Her child took that moment to remind her it was there, jabbing it's foot into her gut and then rolling around to resettle. She'd only begun feeling it's subtle movements a few weeks prior, but it had taken every advantage of it's growing playground in the meantime to flail around in the extra space. They were due at the doctors in two days to learn the sex and she remembered being excited to get the news. Now, this morning, in spite of the thrashing in her womb, she felt empty.

She made her way back to the bedroom where Kaidan was now sitting up on his side of the bed. She sneered at his back, for a split second her mind screaming that he was on the wrong side of the bed. When he turned grace her with a smile, the feeling passed and she took a deep breath, reminding herself that she had always slept on the right. What was happening? "How are my two favorite people this morning?" he asked, standing to cross the room and sweep her into a hug. He leaned to kiss her, but she turned her face and pressed her forehead to his in an oddly familiar gesture. Had he always been that short? He pulled away from her with a frown on his face as his hands lingered on her upper arms. "Is everything alright?" he asked, his eyes shifting up and down her whole body.

She pressed her lips together and nodded. "Fine," she agreed. "Just tired I guess."

"How about some breakfast?" he asked with a grin.

She nodded. "Oh, yes, please."

They made their way down stairs and when they entered the kitchen, her parents sat at the island, coffee mugs in front of them. Something about seeing them drew tears from her eyes, like she hadn't seen them in years. When her mother looked up to greet them and saw her crying, she stood and hurried to her side. "Oh, baby, what's wrong?"

"Mom," she sobbed, falling into her mother's embrace. Her father stood and she saw him and Kaidan exchange a glance after which Kaidan shrugged. "I'm sorry," she said, pulling away from her mother and wiping the tears from her cheeks.

Her mother pursed her lips in a knowing glance, and chuckled. "No need to apologize for hormones, sweet heart. When I was pregnant with you, ask your father, watching toast cook made me weepy."

Her father chuckled, too. "It's true."

She smiled, but couldn't shake the sinking feeling in her gut. Her memories were jumbled. Something was wrong.

* * *

 

Shepard's message had pinged ship-wide only a few hours ago, and the crew had gathered around the memorial wall outside the elevator on the crew deck. Tali had begged him to take a break and come to honor Shepard. As he stood in front of the wall, a strip of metal in his talons with her name printed across it, the crew stood behind him, not a peep coming from any of them. They were mourning as if Shepard were dead. He traced his talons over the letters of her name and couldn't bring himself to place the placard. He turned to face the others, dropping the offensive metal at his feet. "We don't have time to give up on Shepard," he mumbled, his voice raw. "Dismissed."

The others glanced back and forth at each other, and not one of them was willing to question him. They slowly dispersed and he made his way back to the Main Battery where he was working in tandem with the engineers down in the core, trying to get the Normandy back in the air. He worked about ten minutes before there was a knock on his door. "Hey, Garrus."

"Kaidan," he said in greeting as he spliced two wires together, "Need me for something?"

The Major moved up beside him and tapped a mug down on the inactive console beside him. The teasing scent of Kava wafted up to his nostrils and he turned to glance at Kaidan with his brow plates raised. The man held his own mug, and leaned back on the wall to regard Garrus with sympathy. "I know what it feels like to lose her."

"We haven't lost her," Garrus insisted, ignoring the steaming mug and going back to his work.

"She gave me that note back on Earth. She asked me to not let you kill yourself in her absence. Whether that absence is permanent or not, I have my orders," Kaidan said, a shifting of fabric telling Garrus he had shrugged.

Garrus sighed and set his tools down. He grudgingly picked up the mug and sipped the hot beverage. "Donnelly tells me that the drive core is responding to some of the adjustments. I have ripped up all of the panels I know about, trying to figure out the problem."

"I'm no engineer, but it sounds like when the ship went down, all of the eezo was sucked from the core. Almost like an old school ground vehicle trying to start up with no gas. It wants to, but it has nothing to spark it," Kaidan suggested.

"If this were the Mako, I'd know exactly how to fix it," Garrus hummed, his frustration mounting. "I wish we still had EDI."

Kaidan sighed. "Do you think Shepard knew what would happen when she fired off the Crucible?"

"Ruthless calculus," he rumbled sadly.

"Huh?" Kaidan asked.

Garrus shook his head. "It was something we discussed more than once throughout this war. Reducing the war to arithmetic. One million die over here so 20 million over there can live... She hated that option."

"Shepard was a soldier..." Kaidan said, but before he could finish, Garrus clucked his tongue.

"Shepard _is_ a soldier," he growled.

"Right," Kaidan amended. "Shepard is a soldier. She knows that hard decisions come with the territory."

"That doesn't mean it didn't tear her up to make those decisions. I've watched her for years now, the weight of every death she felt responsible for settling on her shoulders..." he nearly smashed the mug against the wall. "It doesn't seem fair that she would have to make that decision alone. I should have been there."

He was doing his best to keep his emotions under control on the surface, but deep inside, his subharmonics were screaming. Kaidan pushed away from the wall and sighed. "Joker thinks he knows where we are based on the old star charts that Liara dug up in the Normandy's databases."

"How's _he_ holding up?" Garrus asked, grateful for the change of subject.

"He's pretty broken up. Tali is doing everything she can to get EDI back, but she says that her whole system was fried. Even if she gets her back on her feet, there is no guarantee that she will be the same EDI."

"Well, that's reassuring," he said with sarcasm. He set the unfinished Kava back on the console and picked his tools back up. "What's the ration situation?"

Kaidan set his mug down too and crossed his arms. "We've crashed on a garden world and preliminary scans show that the plant and wildlife ground-side is safe for levo consumption. Our problem is, we are light-years from any planet with anything for you and Tali."

Garrus hummed. "How long?"

"A few months..." Kaidan shrugged.

"All the more reason to get this ship in the air."

* * *

 

Two days later, Garrus sat in the mess, picking at his half of a ration bar and taking a forced break that Tali had talked him into. He'd cut back on his own eating habits to make certain that she would have enough to eat. Her immune system was trickier than usual now that her Geth was gone from her suit. She needed all of the nutrition she could get. Every time he was alone and not working on the ship, his mind wandered to Shepard. Where was she? Was she safe? Had anyone found her? No matter how many terrible conclusions bounced around in his mind, he refused to believe she had not survived. After he took a small bite from the ration bar, Tali came tearing out of the med bay and a slew of Quarian curses followed in her wake. "Keelah, I am so stupid. How did I not think of this before?!"

He didn't think she even noticed him as she sped past. He got up from his chair and followed her to Liara's room. Once he got inside, the two were talking rapidly, their heads pressed together. "What's happening?" he asked curiously.

Tali glanced over her shoulder. "I have been such an idiot! I've been trying to reboot EDI like you would a machine, but I was just sitting there on the floor, talking to her like she could hear me and then I realized. EDI may have a computer for a brain, but she is no machine. I've repaired every fried circuit. There is no reason she should not be functioning."

"So?" he prompted when she glanced at him like he should be understanding what she was talking about.

"Ugh... So... I think that if Liara and Joker try to reach her, the Asari way, we might be able to bring her back," Tali concluded.

Liara looked skeptical. "I've never melded with a synthetic mind before...." she paused then her eyes widened. "The Cosmic Imperative... Joker is not the one I need."

She dashed from the room and headed for the elevator. "Where's she going?" Garrus asked, wondering what she had been talking about.

Tali shrugged, her arms wrapping around herself. After a few moments, Tali nudged his arm. "You're supposed to be on a break."

He graced her with a half grin. "This is much more interesting. Besides... Being alone with my own thoughts. It's not a good place for me right now."

Tali's head cocked and her shoulders slumped in sympathy. "Do you really believe that Shepard is still alive?"

"I'd like to think that if something had happened to her, I would know, but in reality, I'm no psychic. I just wish that anything I did would feel productive. If I'm not on my way back to her soon, I just might lose my cool," he admitted.

Tali nodded slowly. "She left you in charge because she trusted you to keep your cool no matter what."

He chuckled. "I'm pretty sure her reasoning was the exact opposite. She put me in charge so I'd be too busy to do something rash."

"She _did_ know you best," Tali teased as they heard the elevator returning. "Let's see what Liara has up her sleeve."

Liara returned with a reluctant Javik. "I do not see the use in bringing the machine back online. There are much more pressing matters we could be..."

Liara spun to snap at him. "If you ever want to get off this planet, we need EDI's help to get the ship running again."

Javik scowled at her, his arms crossing over his chest. "I do not think that is necessary. This ship was functional before the AI was installed. It should not need it to function again."

"If the engineers could find the problem, that would be true, but it's been days and I've personally checked every system and re-calibrated the mainframe several times with nothing to show for it. It's time to let the professionals handle it," Garrus argued in favor of helping EDI.

Javik grumbled and his four eyes narrowed as he glared at all three of them. "As you say... Captain," he responded.

Javik and Liara disappeared into the AI core. They were gone for hours and Tali and Garrus found themselves sitting in the med bay like it was some sort of hospital waiting room. Garrus' thoughts wandered back to Earth and he and Shepard's not so private conversation. In just a week, he had gone from blissfully happy to having his world ripped away from him. He'd secretly been researching in his free time like he did every time he had a question about human customs. His decision to ask Shepard to join his clan would probably put his father in an early grave, but he'd been willing to take that risk. She'd even responded positively in favor of settling down and starting a life and a family with him. Her small chuckle and the words ' _I'm game_ ' drifted through his thoughts as he sat quietly, waiting to see if Tali's idea worked.

Liara stumbled from the AI core, being heavily supported by Javik who waved off Garrus' help and said, "Go... the machine needs a reboot."

Tali practically ran for the AI core and Garrus hurried after her. EDI was still lying prone on the small upraised area at the back of the core. Tali was frantically snapping off commands from her omnitool. EDI's body jerked a few times and the lights to the core flickered. "Come on, you bosh'tet," Tali cursed at her omnitool and re-entered the codes. "It isn't strong enough," she sighed as she tried again.

Garrus stepped up beside her and said, "Transmit me the codes. We will fire it off together."

She quickly swiped the operations codes to his omnitool and he ran the code through his settings. When he was ready, she took his hand in hers and touched it over EDI's chest. Her body twitched again, but still it laid still. The difference was that the core hummed noisily as the lights all began to come to life. "EDI?" Tali asked cautiously as the lights, one by one, clicked on around them.

"Thank you for plugging in the Overlord, 2.0. What manner of death would you like inflicted upon you?" EDI's sultry voice purred from the speakers around them. After a brief pause where neither he or Tali took a breath, the lights flicked again and EDI hummed. "That was a joke."

"Glad to see the shut down didn't effect your personality, EDI," Garrus said with a small grin.

"Yes, it seems that I am once more in control of the Normandy, although, my body is another matter. It may take some time for me to fully integrate back into it. May I ask, where is Jeff?"

Tali hummed. "Last I knew, he was in the Port lounge. Are you having trouble seeing?"

EDI was silent for a moment, and then she said. "Some of my background processes have ceased. I will need to run a full diagnostic to determine why I am unable to perform certain functions as I used to."

"Do you want me to bring Joker to you?" Tali asked softly.

"I would... appreciate that, Tali. I will need some time to return to full functionality."

Garrus hummed and patted Tali's shoulder. "You stay and help her. I will get Joker."

"Thanks," Tali said, already distracted by her work almost as soon as he had offered.

Outside the core, the lights on the Normandy felt brighter. Liara was passed out on one of the medbay beds, Chakwas working on her. Javik hovered with what looked like concern. Garrus passed by, to get Joker and nodded his thanks to the Prothean.

Joker was indeed holed up in the Port lounge, bottle in hand, half empty. "Hey, Joker," Garrus said, his voice low as he tried not to startle the man.

Joker looked up. His cap was askew atop his head, his eyes were red rimmed and he reeked of alcohol. "Ugh, Why is it so bright in here?"

Garrus gently pulled the bottle from the pilot's hands and Joker grumbled. "Tali, Liara and Javik have managed to get EDI back online. She seems a bit out of sorts, and her body is still out of commission, but she asked for you."

"They what?!" Joker slurred, trying to stand but only making it halfway before dropping back into the stool beneath him.

"Slow down there," Garrus warned, moving to hover beside the man in case he were to drop.

Joker snorted. "That coming from _you_? You realize if EDI can get the ship running again, we can go find Shepard, right?"

"I'm aware," Garrus chuffed. "But you just got your girlfriend back. You should be worried about her."

"Shepard saved the freakin' galaxy. We need to find her. You were right not to put her name up on that wall..." Joker slurred, his words mincing so badly that Garrus' translator was having trouble deciphering everything.

Garrus agreed. "There must have been a damned good reason for her to sacrifice EDI and the Geth. I know she didn't do anything without knowing the entirety of the consequences."

"But now EDI's back!" Joker almost shouted. "I should go see her."

* * *

 

Shepard sat across the dinner table from Kaidan, her eyes slightly narrowed as he rambled on about something. She couldn't bring herself to fully listen to him when her world felt so wrong. It had been days since she'd felt normal. He had insisted on taking her out for the evening, blaming her pregnancy hormones for her strange behavior and saying she needed some time to unwind. "Ann?" she blinked at him, realizing he was addressing her. "Ann," he took her hand in his, and squeezed it. "You look like you're a million miles away. What's wrong?"

Every time he said her name, she fought the urge to scowl. His lips were never meant to call her by her first name. All of her memories told her that he had always called her that, but her gut was screaming that it sounded wrong. She tugged her hand away and sighed. "I need to use the restroom, excuse me."

She stood abruptly and made her way to the bathroom. After checking that she was alone, she locked the door and leaned her palms on the cold marble of the sinks. She stared at herself in the mirror and again she was looking at a relative stranger. Her rose colored nails tapped on the marble and she fidgeted in her own skin. She closed her eyes and when she opened them, a frightening sight looked back at her. Her eyes were ringed in bruises, her hair matted with blood and dirt. Her nose bled and there was a trickle of blood dripping from the corner of her mouth. She no longer wore the floral print sundress she'd stuffed herself into. Instead, she wore a strange sort of armor that had been completely destroyed. Her chest heaved as she took in her bloodied and beaten countenance. Her stomach had flattened and she looked like a different person. Her breath was short and she closed her eyes again, pressing her lids together to scrub the vision from her eyes. When her eyes opened again, she saw herself. Floral print dress and cute baby bump intact. She hugged herself while she tried to regain some sense of her equilibrium. She jumped when she heard another female's voice. "Ugh, look at you..." She knew she had been alone.

"Who...?" she turned to look at the intruder and her heart skipped a beat. The person standing in front of her, arms crossed casually, had the general shape of a female, but everything else was truly alien. In place of hair, her head was shaped by six small tentacle like objects that swooped gracefully from her forehead to a gentle point on the back of her head. She dressed in mostly leather and her skin peeked out from between the straps of the clothing. The most startling thing about her was that the skin was blue.

Shepard backed into the edge of the sink, putting as much distance between her and the striking creature as she could. "I've been trying to reach you for days. Who the hell's fantasy is this?" The woman's blue eyes flicked around the room and her lip curled back in a disgusted sneer.

"What are you talking about?" Shepard asked, her arms crossed protectively over her abdomen.

The intelligent blue eyes fell on her again. "Look, I don't have much time here. After the Crucible fired, the Citadel nearly crumbled completely. I was able to hitch a ride from one of the shuttles lying around abandoned. When the energy settled and I could fly again, I had my men search everywhere for your body. What we found was a little more alive than we thought possible, considering the state of your implants. I managed to get you to Earth and miraculously found your little Cerberus friend. She's doing everything she can to repair the damage, but with the limited resources that the Crucible left us with, you're hanging on by a thread."

Shepard felt her mouth drying out as she gaped at the woman. "That really didn't explain anything to me," she said, closing her mouth and cocking her head.

The woman let out a frustrated grunt before moving up to stand inches from her face. "Snap out of it! You're Commander fucking Shepard! For fuck's sake. I need you to come out of whatever fantasy you've constructed for yourself. You're going to die if you don't wake up."

"Are you threatening me?" she asked, her fists clenching.

"If I am, what are you going to do about it, Shepard?" the woman taunted. Her fingers lifted and her hands were wreathed in a blue aura. "You gonna stop me?"

Shepard cringed away from the woman, but it wasn't necessary. The woman backed away and dropped her hand. "Where did you come from?"

"I'm out there in the real world. Where _you_ should be."

"You said I was 'Commander Shepard'? You've got the wrong person. I'm Ann Alenko. I've never been Commander of anything..." she insisted, something in her gut telling her that was a lie.

"We don't have time for this," the woman sighed. "I'm here helping you because you saved the fucking galaxy, but if you don't want to save yourself, I'm not going to bother. Maybe the Justicar will have better luck when we find her." The woman disappeared into thin air and Shepard gasped. Her heart was racing and her hands were shaking. Suddenly, her baby kicked her so hard in her left side that she swore his foot was going to come straight through her skin. She doubled over, the pain drawing a cry out of her mouth.

Someone was pounding on the bathroom door. As she clutched at her side, she felt a slick substance on her palm. When she pulled her hand away from her side, it was coated in blood she panicked as she looked down and saw her stomach again flattened and covered in the blackened armor she'd seen in the mirror. She gritted her teeth against the pain as the pounding on the door continued. She closed her eyes, dropping to her knees. She was finding it difficult to open her eyes again. When her lids fluttered open, she was looking up into a bright light in an otherwise dark room. "She's responding!" A woman's voice heavily accented called out. "Shepard, can you hear me?"

"Miranda," she whispered, the voice approaching her. A woman hovered over her, her dark hair and blue eyes so familiar. Before she could react, the pain in her body drug a whimper from her throat and she felt the fantasy world take hold again.

"Ann!" Kaidan's voice was panicked as she came beck to herself. "Oh, God... call 911! Ann!"

His warm hand cupped her cheek as she opened her eyes. "What happened?" she grunted, her head screaming. She reached up and pressed the heel of her hand to her forehead, trying to quell the pounding.

"I have no idea. You went to the bathroom about 15 minutes ago. We had to break the door to get in here. We found you passed out on the floor..." he said, his voice barely a whisper.

She tried to sit up, and he pushed her back down. "Kaidan, please."

"No. You shouldn't move. Think of the baby," he scolded his hold on her firm.

"He's fine," she insisted, feeling him rolling around in her womb.

"No offense, but I think I'd rather let a doctor tell me that," Kaidan soothed with a soft grin.

"Don't patronize me," she grunted. When the look on his face switched to one of horror, she immediately felt bad. "I'm sorry," she said. "You know I hate doctors."

He frowned. "You've never told me that..."

She was swept away in an ambulance to the nearby hospital where she was poked and prodded and asked questions she had no idea how to answer. How did you tell someone you had phantom pain from injuries that you'd never actually sustained and that you were hallucinating that you were a different person all together and getting visited by made up creatures? She was guaranteed to spend the rest of her pregnancy in a mental institution. That would destroy Kaidan, so she played the ignorance card. She was sent home with a clean bill of health and a giant question mark over Kaidan's head. She had some 'splainin' to do.

* * *

 

EDI had done a lot of work in the past week. She'd almost immediately been able to bring the ship's systems back online, but after they had taken off, and Joker had piloted them to the nearest relay, the sight had been devastating. The top wing of the relay was snapped in half and the normal white glow of the relay's core was absent, the rotating rings that powered and contained the energy were still. Every engineer present had put their heads together to try and figure out the issue. Liara and Javik on the other hand had been working on getting communications back up and running. They'd been able to fix the short range comms, but the long range QEC was beyond them. Traynor bounced back and forth between the two groups lending whatever ideas she had to the cause. Garrus felt more useless by the day. If they needed an engine or a gun calibrated he could have helped, but he was no engineer. Kaidan was not far behind him. The man continuously hunted him down on the ship and tried to talk. Shepard's final wish had apparently been to annoy him for all eternity if she had put Kaidan on 'Garrus watch' like Kaidan had told him. "One last practical joke, huh?" he asked her as he gathered her favorite hoodie up from the edge of the couch and sat down to rub the fabric between his fingers. "Spirits, I miss you, Shepard." He sighed, allowing the keening in his chest out in full force. Even though he knew that the others couldn't hear it, he always tried to control himself while they were depending on him. If Shepard could hear him now, she'd probably have told him to 'suck it up sunshine'. He allowed himself a small smile at the thought before he dragged himself up to sit in her desk chair and fiddle with the computer, trying some background processes to try and reach a satellite. It may be an outdated method of communication, but it was worth a shot.

Hours later, he rubbed his eyes and wished he had some Kava. He was just about to give up when the computer pinged out a flash message. He gazed in disbelief at the screen as the message scrolled across. It was dated the day after the mission to Earth. *TO ALL SHIPS THAT DID NOT MAKE IT TO THE RENDEZVOUS POINT. THE CITADEL AND THE RELAYS ARE HEAVILY DAMAGED. TRAVEL IS SLOWED TO FTL SPEEDS FOR THE TIME BEING. THE CRUCIBLE FIRED AT 0900 LONDON TIME ON DECEMBER 21ST 2186. BEFORE COMMUNICATIONS WERE SEVERED, REPORTS FROM EARTH STATED THAT THE REAPERS AND THEIR FORCES WERE FALLING. REPEAT: THE REAPERS WERE FALLING. ADMIRAL DAVID ANDERSON WAS KIA AND THE CURRENT WHEREABOUTS OF COMMANDER ANN SHEPARD ARE STILL UNKNOWN.*

Garrus slammed down on the comm button on Shepard's desk and said, "Liara! I've uncovered a flash message from the Alliance."

"You what?" her voice sounded weary and sluggish. He must have woken her.

"Wait there. I'll be right down," he said excitedly.

He didn't wait for her response. He transferred the flash message to a data pad and hurried down to her quarters. Outside the door, Glyph hovered, the humming of the drone grating on his nerves. "Dr. T'Soni requests that you wait outside while she makes herself presentable."

Garrus cocked his head. "Presentable?"

"That's quite enough, Glyph," Liara scolded as she opened the door. Javik sat at the rear console of her room looking awfully suspicious while the Asari adjusted her belt. Her cheeks were flushed purple and he almost choked on the pheromones wafting through the room.

He allowed himself a chuckle as he realized what had been happening. Liara's eyes narrowed when Javik leaned back in the chair to look Garrus in the eyes and nod his head in confirmation. "Well, Dr. T'Soni, while you were... engaging in an inter-species liaison, I discovered something you might like to see," he hummed teasingly.

She snatched the datapad he offered her and read over the message. "This message is weeks old," she sighed.

"The fact that I was able to recover it at all is a damned gift from the spirits. The point is that there are others out there and apparently still on Earth," he pointed out.

"We are months outside of the Sol system by FTL travel," Javik said.

"That is true, but if Shepard is still alive, I'd like to know we were on the way to her instead of getting ping ponged around the galaxy by faulty relays. The Citadel controls the entire relay network. If it is out of commission, fixing this relay won't get us any closer to Earth."

Liara frowned. "You may be right."

"I'm giving the order..." he insisted, leaving Liara's cabin and calling the entire crew to the war room.

Once everyone had gathered, James shifted in his spot before asking. "So, Scars, why'd you bring us here?"

Garrus stood in military at ease position, his hands clasped behind his back as he glanced over his people. "I was recently able to recover an Alliance flash message from the old satellite feeds." He pulled up the message to display on the holo of the war table. As the others read over it, he continued. "This message tells me that even if we repair this relay, there will be nowhere for us to land after we enter. When Shepard destroyed the Alpha relay, the entire system connected to it was wiped from the galaxy. Those of you who were working on repairing the relay, I'd like you to gather all of the data from it that you can and use it to explain why the destruction of these relays didn't break the galaxy. In the meantime, Joker, I'm going to need you and EDI to get us to Earth as soon as you can. Our relay data might be of use in repairing the entire network. Liara, keep working on bringing back our QEC. Any communication is good communication."

* * *

 

Shepard was sitting in her kitchen. She was supposed to be mincing garlic for Kaidan to cook dinner, but her mind had wandered to the episode she'd had in that restaurant bathroom nearly a month ago. More and more about her life had started to feel wrong. She was finding it harder and harder to force herself to function. Food tasted like ash and those phantom pains kept returning. She had become exceptionally good at hiding the crazy whenever Kaidan or her parents were around. The child in her womb felt surreal. Something was telling her mind that it was impossible that she could be pregnant. When she thought too hard about it, she got a sharp headache and swift kick in the ribs. She grumbled to herself and took up her knife to focus on the task at hand, but before she got halfway through the first clove, the face of the alien woman flashed before her eyes again. Her hands slipped and she felt the bite of the knife against her skin. "Shit," she cursed getting up to run the cut under the water.

"Goddess, you're pathetic."

Shepard yelped and spun. The woman was back, her arms still crossed and her hips cocked seductively. Shepard grabbed up a towel from the counter and wrapped her bleeding finger before glaring at the woman. "Who are you and what do you want?"

The woman chuckled, her laughter tugging at bits of Shepard's libido that Kaidan hadn't hit in months. Shepard leaned casually against the counter to try and hide the shudder that slid down her spine. "Who I am is an old friend. As for what I want, you couldn't afford everything I want, Shepard. But for now, what I _need_ is for you to rip yourself out of this sorry existence and come back to the real world. Your wounds aren't healing because your mind is stuck in here. You need to figure out the lie that tethers you to this ' _nightmare_ ' and snuff it out."

"What lie? What do you mean?" Shepard pleaded, not understanding.

"Well, from what I'm seeing, the lie is nestled right around there," the woman gestured at her swollen abdomen. "You aren't carrying a leech in the real world."

Shepard balked. She had to be insane. She was hallucinating a blue woman who was telling her to kill her unborn child so she could return to the real world. "No," she said defensively, wrapping her arms around her belly.

"If you'd like, I could help," the woman offered, that strange blue glow surrounding her hands reappearing like the last time. "It will only take a flick of the wrist."

Her fingers twitched and Shepard lifted her own arms as a surge of fear pulsed through her veins. "No!" she shouted again and her skin tingled and hummed.

When she opened her eyes after nothing happened, she saw her whole body wreathed in the blue glow just like the other woman's hands. She held her own hands out in front of her and the glow sparked. The woman laughed again with a satisfied smirk. "There's a hint of the real you."

"I'm doing this?" she asked, her voice high and panicked. She shook her hands, trying to stop the glow. "What is this?"

"Get control of yourself," the woman sighed stepping closer to her. She grabbed her wrist and the other woman shuddered as she held tight to Shepard's arm. The glow began to seep from her skin as the woman apparently absorbed the excess. "The real Commander Shepard has much better control over her emotions."

Shepard pulled her hand from the woman's grasp and rubbed her wrist. "What did you do to me?"

"For a moment there, _you_ woke up from this delusion. Whoever is fucking with you is doing a damned good job of convincing you this is your life. You dropped the Reapers, so its not them..." As the woman said the word Reapers, Shepard was slammed with a flash of images that assaulted her mind. Images of destruction and death and giant metallic beings raining horrors on the universe. She stumbled back, her hands over her eyes as she tried to shake the images from her mind.

"Reap..." she breathed, feeling faint. When she opened her eyes, the woman was standing over her, her eyes black. She was back in the dark room, the bright light haloing the figure above her. "Aria..." she breathed, recognizing the woman finally. Her body seized as her mind tried to reassert it's own will.

"Cerberus! Get over here! She's having a fit!" Aria shouted, her grip on Shepard's shoulders tightening to hold her in place.

Miranda appeared out of nowhere with a needle. Shepard reached out and grabbed Aria's elbow. "Don't let me forget!" she growled through gritted teeth.

Miranda smiled gently. "Your body needs to heal Shepard. Most of your implants have failed." Sharp stabbing pain jutted from the gunshot wound in her side. "You need to relax before you pass out again."

Shepard fought the darkness, but there was only so much she could do. Her body was weak. As Miranda injected a blue liquid into the IV taped to her forearm, her head swam. "I don't wanna forg...."

She woke up on the floor of her kitchen. Her head was spinning and she felt nauseous. She got to her feet, her stomach heaving. She retched into the sink, losing her lunch down the disposal. As she finished vomiting, she felt a palm on her back. When she turned, she expected to see the strange woman but instead it was Kaidan with a puppy dog look of concern. "You all right, Ann?"

She groaned, stepping away from his touch. "I'm fine." She looked down at the throbbing cut on her finger. "I...uh... I cut my finger when I was mincing the garlic. The blood... made me nauseous." She lied.

He took her hand in his and surveyed the cut. "It doesn't look like it'll need stitches. Come on. I'll get you bandaged up."

She nodded and followed him to the bathroom where he ran the cold water in the sink and held the finger under the water. She hissed as the water stung, but he held her fast. Then he fished the first aid kit from under the sink and wrapped the cut in a couple of bandages before gently kissing her palm. He smiled up at her while he caressed her knuckles with his thumb. "I'm okay," she promised, cupping his cheek with her opposite hand. The events that led up to her waking up on the floor were fading.

His eyes pleaded with her for the truth. "You've been so distant lately, Ann. I wish you would let me in."

"I'm really fine," she sighed, her thumb caressing over his cheekbone. The smoothness of his skin felt odd for a second and as she gazed at his eyes, she couldn't get over the fact that they were still the wrong color.

He stood and sighed, helping her to get up from the edge of the bathtub. They pressed together in the small space and she hugged him. "I love you, Ann," he sighed in her ear.

She tucked her face in the curve of his neck, expecting to have to go up on her toes, instead she had to slouch a bit. Why did his embrace feel so wrong? She held on for a few moments more then said, "I should clean that mess up in the kitchen before mom and dad get home." At the thought of a mess in the kitchen, she gasped as a slew of strange memories slipped through her mind. Coming home from a day in the barn... mom and dad in the kitchen, murdered. She grabbed the knife an ran at the sound of the intruders. Batarians! Her mind screamed. What were Batarians? As the vision faded, her child rolled in her womb and a tear slipped from her eye. She snuffed her reaction, rubbing a palm over her belly and playing her gasp off as a kick. She blinked the tears away and fled from his sight so he didn't see her cry.

* * *

 

A short month after they left the relay, the Normandy ran across a small fleet of Quarian ships that were slowly trying to limp to the rendezvous point that Hackett had established before the war. As an Admiral, Tali was able to barter some rations for her and Garrus in exchange for some badly needed ship parts to repair the damaged engines of two of the vessels. The emissary that came aboard to make the exchange was none other than her old friend Kal'Reegar.

"Reegar! You're alive! Keelah," she sighed as she fell into his arms almost making him drop the box he was carrying.

"The entire fleet has been looking for word on the Normandy," he said with a chuckle. "But you've not responded to any of our hails."

"Our QEC is down. We can't seem to get it working," she said backing away and wringing her hands. "We only have short range comms."

"With your Captain's permission, I can stay on board and help you fix the problem. I'm no engineer, but they uploaded my suit with some QEC programs just before the assault on Earth," Reegar offered.

Garrus took the box from Reegar's arms with a smile and said, "Any help would be greatly appreciated, but we're heading for Earth, not the rendezvous."

"Reegar, do you know anything about what happened to the Geth?" Tali asked before he could answer Garrus.

Reegar turned his helmet to Tali and sighed. "Best we can tell, they went down with the Reapers... along with any other sentient computers. There is a fleet led by Admiral Xen that is trying to get the Geth back online, but nothing seems to be working."

Tali sighed. "I figured that was the case. We were able to bring EDI back online, but it took an Asari and our Prothean friend to get it done. Even so, she has not been able to get her body back online and full functionality is compromised."

He nodded in thought. "There has been a general consensus that our main concern should be getting the relays back online. Xen believes that if we get back to Rannoch, we could get into the Geth's hubs and try to hardwire their mainframe, but with their Reaper upgrades, there is no guarantee that they will be the same as they were."

Tali wrung her hands again and bounced in place. "I actually had some ideas about the relays. We took some readings from one of the damaged ones, and it looks like when the Crucible fired, it's energy was carted around the galaxy via the relay network. As it passed through each relay, it gathered all of the power from the relay and took it with it, rendering them inert. That is why they didn't destroy the systems like when the Alpha relay was destroyed.... If I can get to the Citadel and see how damaged the Crucible is, I may be able to send another command through it. A sort of reverse protocol that will bring the network back online."

"That is brilliant, Tali," Reegar said, a smile clear in his voice.

She shrugged and shuffled her feet. Could Quarian's blush? If so, Garrus was certain that Tali was a deep shade of red. "Only if it works. And I'll need a team of scientists at my back to make sure whatever I do doesn't bring the Reapers back online..."

"I have faith in you," Reegar said, his hand finding Tali's shoulder.

Garrus cleared his throat and said, "We should get moving again. Reegar if you're coming with us, you're more than welcome. We would appreciate your help with the QEC."

"Of course. Let me get the transfer approved and we can go," he said with a bow of his head before turning to go back out the airlock and over to his ship.

Tali turned to Garrus. "If they have QEC capabilities throughout the fleet, do you think they have news about Shepard?"

Garrus hummed in thought. "Perhaps you should ask your boyfriend when he gets back."

Tali balked and then reached out to punch Garrus' upper arm. "You bosh'tet! It's not like that!"

He chuckled. "Please, I can practically see the doe eyes through your helmet, Tali."

"Reegar is a marine who served under my Command on Haestrom. Nothing more..." she insisted, her hands wringing again.

He hummed again. "Yes, well, I was a soldier under Shepard's command once, too, you know." He raised his brow plates suggestively.

Tali sighed. "I _do_ like Reegar, but there really has to be something _very_ special between two Quarians if they decide to risk linking their suits." she rambled.

Garrus nudged her. "Hey, I'm not pressuring you. I'm just pointing out that your little crush is not one sided."

"It is _not_ a crush. It is a friendship built on... okay, even I know that sounds ridiculous... Keelah," she sighed.

* * *

 

They were coming up on the Sol system. They were minutes from viewing distance of Earth and Garrus paced the cockpit behind an irritated Joker. "You know, Shepard used to do that too. Now I know why you two were made for each other. Pacing behind me won't get us there any faster."

"No," Garrus agreed. "But it makes me feel better."

"When we find Shepard, I hope she pulls that stick back out of your ass..." Joker grumbled.

The Normandy zipped into the Sol system and Joker powered down the FTL drives. The first thing that caught Garrus' eye was the inert relay, just like the other they had encountered. Mildly broken apart and quiet. Several small ships hovered around the relay, likely doing minor system and structural repairs. The next thing that came into view was the Citadel. Garrus flinched at the sight. All five of the arms were missing pieces, leaving them at various lengths as the debris of the destruction floated in space around the dimly lit Citadel. The Crucible itself looked relatively intact. More ships hovered in and out of the arms of the Citadel including the Destiny Ascension.

"EDI, can we contact the Ascension?" Garrus asked, hoping that the comms would reach. Even with Reegar's repairs, they had limited communications because of the dead comms on the other end of the line.

"Establishing a link," EDI confirmed as he took in the mass amounts of Reaper corpses that floated in the vacuum. At least Shepard had done what she'd set out to do, even though the consequences had been pretty crippling to the universe.

When the comm static signaled a connection, Garrus stepped forward. "This is Alliance Vessel SSV Normandy. Ascension, do you read?"

"Roger that Normandy. This is the Ascension, good to have you back. Is Shepard on board?" a female voice answered.

Joker turned his frown to Garrus as Garrus' stomach sank. He refused to hear what she had said. "Ascension, repeat your inquiry?" Garrus hummed, barely containing his keening subvocals.

"Repeat Normandy... Is Shepard on board?" the woman said again.

Garrus was speechless. If the Ascension had no idea where Shepard was, there was little hope of finding her. As he hovered over the open channel, unable to bring words to voice, Joker took over. "Uh... Negative Ascension. We thought she was with you guys..."

"We've had crews searching all over the Citadel for months, but no one has recovered the Commander or her body," the woman said with disappointment. It was as if all hope drained from the room. Joker sighed heavily and Garrus started to growl at the incompetence.

Joker silenced the communications momentarily. "What are your orders?"

Garrus swallowed his grief around his rapidly beating heart and choked out his next words. "Drop into orbit over London. Find everyone we know. Short range omnitool communications may be the only things working down there, so start with that. Someone has to know where Shepard is. She didn't just vanish."

Joker nodded and signed off with the Ascension before slipping the Normandy into orbit. "What are you going to do?" he asked Garrus.

"I'm taking the spare shuttle. I'm going to gather up our people that are still planet-side. Once we find them, that is. EDI, I'd like you to run a background search for the ships that are carrying the scientists that worked on the Crucible... Tali will need their help if she wants to get the relay network functioning again."

* * *

 

He sat alone in the shuttle, cruising over London. Occasional pings on his readouts showed small pockets of life gathered in different places around London. Looking down on the landscape he could see humans and other species alike, trying to rebuild after the Reapers came down on the city. Everyone he saw seemed to be giving the massive corpses a wide berth. Small bonfires burned on nearly every intersection and his readings told him that folks were gathering the bodies of the Reaper troops and burning them. It had been months. There must have been so many.

He repeated his message, his omnitool glowing in the darkness of the shuttle. "Attention crew of the Normandy. This is acting Captain of the SR2, Garrus Vakarian. We just arrived back in Sol a few hours ago. If anyone reads this, please respond, over."

Static greeted him as it had previously. He sighed. With each silent response, his heart broke just a little bit more. He closed his eyes and leaned back in the seat, allowing the autopilot to do it's job. The open comm line hissed and buzzed around him. Suddenly, he noticed small regular ticks in the white noise. He sat forward, dialing in the signal. He recognized the blips. Shepard had called it Morse Code. It was an old human military standard before there was voice communication. Each blip and tick had a meaning. He had no idea how to decipher it, but he could track the signal back to it's source. He sat forward and interfaced his omnitool with the shuttle navigation and pinpointed the weak signal's location.

Garrus excitedly piloted the shuttle to the source and landed outside of an abandoned building. With his pistol on hand, he exited the shuttle and activated his visor's scanner. There were three human life forms inside the building and he ducked inside the shattered doorway and made his way to the heat signatures. "It's about goddamn time you found us."

The drawling voice was so familiar that Garrus felt a weight lifting off his chest. He blinked, adjusting his eyes to the dimness after the bright sunlight that shone outside. "Massani. As pleasant as ever," Garrus drawled.

"Fuck you," Jack spat as she stood up from her cross legged position on the floor. "Where the fuck have you been?"

"Guys, calm down," the third familiar voice said gently.

Jacob sat on the floor. His right leg was pretty badly mangled and heavily dosed in months worth of medigel. "What happened to you three?" Garrus asked as he knelt beside Jacob to survey the damage to his leg.

Jack crossed her arms. "After the Reapers fell, I got separated from my kids. The world was in chaos. All of the evac shuttles bitched out and left the ground troops planet-side."

"Once I found Taylor, I tracked down this one," Zaeed cocked a thumb at Jack. "We've been trying to find a way back to civilization, but there is no way he can cross the bloody Temps with that leg. Jack and I've been bringing supplies back but it's the best we can do without transport. The goddamned cars won't fly."

"The Normandy just got back. The relay network is dark," Garrus explained. "Whatever Shepard did, it caused a lot of destruction. The Citadel is in pieces, communication is rudimentary. EDI and the Geth dropped along with the Reapers." He sighed.

"The fuck do you mean 'whatever Shepard did'? How do you not know?" Jack asked her large eyes narrowing.

Garrus dropped his head and swallowed. "No body seems to know where she is. Joker was forced to flee the system when the Crucible fired and there was no time to go back for her while the Reapers were still active. The Ascension has apparently been searching the Citadel for months, but haven't recovered her."

"Get me out of here and I'll help you search," Jacob said, trying to pick himself up off the floor. Garrus and Zaeed moved to either side of him and lifted him up. He cried out as his leg shifted, but he remained upright and conscious.

"I'll take you back to the Normandy. Chakwas can fix you up," Garrus said.

They practically dragged Jacob to the shuttle and Garrus radioed the Normandy to be ready for them. After dropping him there, Garrus set out again with Jack and Zaeed on board. If they ran into anymore trouble, a small team at his back wasn't a bad idea and they were already armored up. They searched London, grid by grid, sending out communications with their omnitools.

The next group they found was a colony of Krogan who had set up shop near the FOB where they had geared up for the final push. Wrex and Grunt were both there, keeping order and getting the Krogan to assist in cleaning up Earth. Wrex bellowed his joy at seeing Garrus, but his good mood was squashed at the news that Shepard was missing. "This smells wrong," Grunt grumbled as Wrex paced.

"You think she's still alive?" Wrex asked, his attention fully on Garrus.

"I have to believe she is," he sighed.

Wrex slapped him on his carapace, "Then what can the Krogan do to help?"

Garrus shifted his armor back into place and offered a small grin. "I've been trying to reach anyone who served on the Normandy who might be planet-side. So far I've found you guys, Jack, Zaeed and Jacob. Samara and Miranda are still MIA. I'm thinking if anyone has information on Shepard, it's Miranda."

"You're probably right," Wrex agreed. "I'll send out some men to search on foot. You keep doing what you're doing."

Garrus agreed and got back in the shuttle. Jack paced behind him and he began to realize why Joker hated it when he and Shepard did it. "You know, I've been thinking... If the Cheerleader has Shepard, wouldn't she need to have facilities to deal with whatever injuries Shepard had. Those final correspondences made her sound pretty beat down."

Zaeed stood suddenly and said, "You're goddamned right! I grew up in London. There are plenty of hospitals. We should start there."

Garrus gestured to the copilot's seat. Lead the way, Massani." Many of the hospitals in the area were maxed to capacity with the dead and injured although nowhere they looked seemed to be the right place. Garrus was just about to give up hope when an idea crossed his mind. "Miranda is smart." Jack snorted and he waved her off so he could finish. "She knows that Commander Shepard, in any state, would be valuable to anyone who might want to get their hands on her. She would keep her as secret as possible... Zaeed are there any medical facilities in the area that aren't major hospitals that might have the resources Miranda would need without the attention?"

Zaeed grinned, his scarred cheek lifting. "I know just the place." He shifted their trajectory and they flew out over the city and toward an area outside the main grid.

"What is this place?" Jack asked, leaning on the back of Garrus' seat to get a good look at the readouts.

"Old farm with veterinary facilities," Zaeed mused as he ran scans of the area. "Best goddamned pet hospital in the city."

"You think Miranda would take Shepard to an animal hospital?" Garrus asked skeptically.

Jack hummed. "It's out of the way... and vets usually have the same equipment as human doctors. If it's attached to a farm, that means large animals like horses and cows..." At Garrus' amused expression at her knowledge, she sneered. "Bite me Garrus, I was a little girl once."

"And every little girl wants a pony," Zaeed mumbled. "Looks like we might have hit the jackpot. The place is surrounded by mercs."

Garrus' heart skipped a beat. "Bring us in quietly. No reason to spook them. Land nearby and we'll continue on foot."

Minutes later, they were crossing a wide open field toward the veterinary facility. Garrus, in his anticipation, was leaving Jack and Zaeed behind. "Slow the fuck down, would ya?" Jack complained, panting as she jogged to keep up.

"Yeah, some of us don't have the stamina that we used to," Zaeed added, his own breath short.

Garrus grumbled and slowed his pace. He wanted to get to Shepard. That is if Zaeed was right. She needed him and he needed her. She'd said it herself. 'There's no Shepard without Vakarian.' He couldn't help but feel that the reverse was the real truth. He was nothing without her. He questioned every decision he'd made in the last couple of months, hoping that they had led him back to her instead of some wild goose chase.

When they crossed a road that separated the facility grounds from the rest of the farm, they were swarmed by a group of Vorcha. The nearest one hissed. "You are trespassing."

"On who's property?" Jack demanded stepping forward, her body wreathed in blue biotic flame.

Garrus held his palm up and pushed ahead of Jack as the group of Vorcha lifted their weapons. "We're here to see Miranda Lawson," he said, hoping that if Miranda were here, the mention of her name might open some doors.

The lead Vorcha hissed again. "Aria T'Loak ordered we kill intruders."

"Aria is here?" Zaeed asked, his tone curious and his eyes widened.

"Explains these fuckers," Jack grunted, her biotics reigned in to her fists.

Garrus sighed. "If we can't see Miranda, could you tell Aria that some old friends are here to lend a hand?"

The Vorcha exchanged glances and a second one lifted his wrist. "What is it Frack, I'm busy!" Aria's voice slithered out of the Vorcha's omnitool as a holo image of herself appeared before them. Before the Vorcha could respond, she glanced around and saw them standing there. "It's about fucking time you showed up!" her tone was harsh. "Your girlfriend is in bad shape."

Garrus' stomach knotted up. "You have Shepard?" he asked, his mouth dry.

"Of course. You think I'd let the vultures get their hands on her? Cerberus is here doing her best to keep her stable, but we need to get her back to herself." Aria waved her hand dismissively. "Frack, show them in. I'll explain when you see her."

Garrus chafed at the slow pace that the Vorcha led them at. He was so close to Shepard, he imagined he could smell her through the lingering smell of animals and antiseptic. They stepped inside a small lobby that was littered with humans, Krogan and even a few Salarians. They passed through the lobby into a dark hallway. At the very end of the hallway there was a door covered by faded vinyl strips. The vorcha pointed them inside and then left them to make their own way in. Garrus pushed the strips aside and stepped through into a dark room. As he inhaled deeply, the first scent that struck him was blood and a lot of it. Beneath the metallic scent was her. Raw, unfiltered Shepard. The cherries and vanilla of her shampoo and body wash were all gone, but he knew her scent without the cover-ups. He'd spent many nights nestled at her back simply breathing her in. He moved further into the dimly lit room where he saw a cluster of people standing around a bed. Miranda was on the sidelines, scribbling on a sheet of paper. When she heard them enter, she looked up and sighed. "Thank God you're here, Vakarian."

Aria stepped from among the group and stood in front of him, her arms crossed. "We don't have time for pleasantries. If we can't reach Shepard soon, we might never get her back. I've been trying since I found her, but I've only pulled her out twice. Obviously it didn't stick."

"Pulled her out of what? I need to know what's going on," Garrus nearly roared as Aria stood in the way between him and his mate. Sooner or later, instinct would kick in.

Miranda set down her clipboard and moved to stand between him and Aria, shooing the Asari back to Shepard's bedside. "Listen, Garrus. When Aria found Shepard she was on the brink of death. She has a gunshot wound in her side that is the worst of her injuries. Multiple contusions, burns, and abrasions on her skin from head to foot... broken bones and torn ligaments, and some internal hemorrhaging that I've been able to slow but not stop. I haven't even chanced cutting her out of her armor. I don't want to make the damage worse. We were lucky that the first time we rebuilt her that most of her major organs were still organic in nature. It's why she is still alive now. Her implants all failed. I've been able to replace some of them, but resources are limited."

"It's been months, Miranda..." he said, not even glancing away from Shepard's bed. He still couldn't see her around the curtain and the cluster of people surrounding her. "Even without her implants, her body should be repairing itself."

"It should, but with her current mental state, we can't get her brain to start firing off the healing commands to the rest of her body. We've tried to reach her, but Aria says the fantasy world she is trapped in has anchored her there."

"And how did she get trapped there in the first place?" he growled.

"We don't know. Someone or something has definitely built the fantasy around her own memories, but it has conveniently left out many key truths. First of all, humanity has never made first contact. Secondly, the Reapers do not exist," Miranda explained, her hips cocked to the side.

He hummed his anger. "So if humanity never made first contact, she will have no idea who or what she's dealing with when we go in there."

"I've managed to get into the fantasy twice. I think I know what is blocking her real memories, but I haven't been able to eliminate the _parasite_ ," Aria said with disgust. "From the looks of things we don't have much time before it manifests itself and we'll lose her for good. I don't hold much stock in _feelings,_ but we are running out of options here."

"What do you need me to do?" He offered, willing to do anything if it would bring Shepard back.

* * *

 

Shepard was lounging on her couch, her feet propped on the coffee table and a book in her hand. The book was propped on her huge belly and she was trying to concentrate on the book around the throbbing migraine in her skull. The words kept mincing together and reforming into different sentences. She closed the book with a sigh and set it on the couch beside her to rub her hand absently over the fluttering of her son. It wasn't going to be long now. She could feel it. His movements had become less frequent as he settled into place, getting ready for his arrival.

When she felt a particularly forceful kick, she lifted her head and opened her eyes, the distinct feeling of someone watching her slithering over her spine. As she glanced around the room, her eyes fell on the blue woman. "You," she stammered, struggling to sit up and get to her feet.

"Yes, me," the woman frowned. "You look ready to pop. I guess it's now or never then."

Shepard backed away. "Stay away from me!" she warned.

The woman laughed, her arms crossed under her chest. "You don't frighten me, kitten. The real you might give me a run for my money, but..." she shrugged. "You don't measure up."

"What do you want from me?" Shepard wailed, her frustration piquing. The doctors had warned her to avoid stress. This was not the way to do that.

" _I_ don't want anything from you. On the other hand, _he_ might have something to say about the situation." The woman casually tossed her chin over Shepard's shoulder.

Shepard spun around and the person standing behind her shattered every illusion that was surrounding them. Her breath caught in her chest and her heart raced a mile a minute. "Garrus!" she choked, all of the wrong things around her finally making sense.

"Shepard," he sighed as if relieved to see her. He held out his arms and in spite of her weak knees, she ran to him, collapsing into his perfect embrace.

She felt the warm tears slipping down her cheeks as she buried her face between his neck and his cowl. Her spot. The perfect height. "Hey there, Big Guy."

His chuckle was forced around a high keening in his chest. He regretfully pulled away and held her at arms length, his perfectly blue eyes surveying her and her condition. She dropped her hands away from his arms and attempted to cover the giant betrayal by pulling her bathrobe closed around what was left of her waist. His mandibles were hugged close to his face as he carefully asked the difficult questions. "Where are we, Shepard?"

She glanced around and her happiness drifted away as he realized where they were. "Mindoir," she sighed, a chill making her shiver. "This is my parent's farm."

He nodded carefully. "And... this..?" He fluttered his hand up and down indicating her.

She bit her lip. "Certainly isn't my fantasy," she replied. "The whole time I've been here, I've known something was wrong. He was too short. His eyes were the wrong color. He called me 'Ann'..." her lip curled back.

"Oh, the horror..." he mocked. His tone was clipped, but she could tell that he knew something was not right.

"Something is wrong here, isn't it?" she asked, stepping toward him.

His eyes were roving the entire setting, taking in every detail and every family portrait. "You mean besides the fact that you seem to be married to Kaidan? Yes. This 'dream' is unnatural. It doesn't smell right here."

"Do you recognize who it might be?" she asked, hoping he might shed some light on the situation.

"This is all very informative, but we really need to speed this up," Aria pressed. "I am an Asari and we have instincts when it comes to this sort of thing. If that _thing_ is born naturally before we can get you out of here, there will be no getting you out."

"What are you talking abo.... Oh," Shepard flinched as her gut seized. She grabbed hold of Garrus' arm and he supported her as the pain ripped through her abdomen.

"You see... instincts," Aria sighed. "You should have let me kill it last time I was here."

"I didn't know," Shepard grunted through gritted teeth as Garrus led her to the couch. Tears streamed down her cheeks as the thought of getting trapped here forever took her breath away. "What can we do now?"

"You need to let it go," Aria pushed as a very real contraction clenched her muscles again.

"How?" Shepard begged. "I can't get stuck here..." She clutched Garrus and his fear filtered through his subharmonics even as he tried to offer up a comforting coo.

"Snuff... it... out!" Aria spoke slowly and loudly.

Shepard shook her head. "I don't have the strength. I need your biotics..." she breathed.

Aria pursed her lips but conceded. "This will be unpleasant... for both of us," she snarled as she stalked toward where Shepard sat. Her palms glowed blue and she placed them flat on either side of Shepard's rounded stomach. Aria fired off the warp directly into Shepard's womb. The biotics ripped over every nerve ending Shepard had and she screamed her throat raw while Garrus held her tightly to his body. He'd gotten her through a Banshee's warp before. This was no different. She simply needed to remember to breathe. The world around them flickered in and out of existence and only Garrus' instincts kept them from falling to the ground as the furniture gave way beneath them. Shepard caught a whiff of saltwater as the remains of the anchor to the nightmare dripped from between her legs. The scent mixed with an acrid smell of death made her heave and gag.

Garrus was mumbling soft words and his talons caressed through her hair as she regained herself. Her world flipped around and she suddenly felt herself in a whole different world of pain. She whimpered as her mind returned to her broken body in the real world. The only thing that didn't change was Garrus' comforting voice and his fingers in her hair. "It's okay, Shepard. We've got you," he cooed. He bent so his forehead barely touched hers. "You're safe."

The room materialized slowly around her as her eyes adjusted to their new environment. Her vision was blurry. "I can hardly see," she whispered, other injuries rearing their ugly heads as Miranda appeared beside Garrus.

"Your implants are in bad shape, Shepard. I've repaired what I could, but replacement parts are in short supply with the state of the galaxy," Miranda said softly as she gently pushed Garrus out of the way to check all of Shepard's vitals. "Your recovery may take time."

"What happened... with the Crucible?" she asked, her attention returning to Garrus.

He glanced up to others who stood around her and she recognized Zaeed and Jack. "It's a lot to explain, Shepard. You should rest."

She shook her head slowly. "I've rested enough. Miranda can tend to me while you tell me a story. I don't trust going to sleep right this moment anyhow." She shuddered.

Garrus sighed and disappeared from her peripheral for a moment. She heard the scraping of a chair as he made himself comfortable beside her. His soothing voice explained what had happened after the power node exploded around her and she lost consciousness. Her heart sunk as he told her about EDI and the Geth. As soon as she was able, she vowed to get out of this bed and do everything she could to give the Geth and EDI their lives back. The most disturbing thing he mentioned was the state of the relay network.

She reached a weak hand out which he took quickly and sat forward. "Your family..." she whispered.

"Should be safe enough while Tali and the brain trust figure out how to get the network up and running," he assured her.

"What about you and the rest of the dextro community?" she asked. "Reserves won't last forever... we need to find a way to get food for..."

He cut her off by squeezing her hand. "Shepard, you are lying half dead in a veterinary clinic. For once, could you please think about yourself?"

Her lip curled and she slowly turned her attention to Miranda. "Seriously? A vet clinic?"

Miranda smiled softly. "It was best that we didn't reveal that you had survived until we knew what was wrong. You know how you were passed around the last time you died. We couldn't risk the wrong people getting their hands on you until we located the rest of the Normandy crew."

Shepard glanced around and her eyes fell on Aria. "So you found me? Why did you hand me to Miranda?"

Aria shrugged. "You did me a favor, so I returned it. I'm not a fan of Cerberus myself and I didn't want any stray factions getting their claws into you. The mind meld was just an added bonus to help save you life." Aria winked at her and she frowned.

Miranda sighed. "We tried to locate the Normandy and Samara both. When we couldn't get Samara or Dr. T'Soni, we used the resources we had."

"We couldn't find Samara either," Zaeed piped up from across the room where both he and Jack lounged against the far wall.

"If the Justicar wanted to be found, we would have found her. She likely jumped the nearest working shuttle and took it back to Lessus," Aria sneered.

Shepard tended to agree with Aria. She figured Samara would want to be certain her only remaining daughter was safe. Shepard was starting to feel her eye lids fluttering. She was afraid to fall asleep, but now she had an anchor to this world. Garrus' hand clutched hers tightly, his thumb gently caressing over her knuckles. "Rest, Shepard," he hummed softly. "I'm not going anywhere."

 


	40. Suspicion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Shepard alive, it is time to turn to figuring out who trapped her in the first place.

Shepard slept like the dead. Garrus had been keeping a constant vigil at her side since they'd found her. Her chest gently rose and fell as she breathed, an extremely welcoming sight. As he clutched her right hand, he studied the machinery that was keeping her vitals stable. Miranda had found the internal bleeding and plugged the mess. Shepard's skin had returned to it's regular tone, the paleness of blood loss receding as her body healed. She was still trapped inside her ruined armor, Miranda deeming it too dangerous to attempt cutting it off until she had a few days of healing under her belt.

It was awful seeing her like this, though it was probably better than the alternative. She had told him once that after Cerberus recovered her the last time, Jacob had described her as 'meat and tubes'. He shuddered and then sat up straighter as he smelled Liara coming down the hallway. Two days ago, the Normandy had landed outside the facility and Chakwas had lent her assistance to Miranda in stabilizing Shepard. When Liara pushed aside the vinyl curtains and stepped in, she smiled at him. "I came to see if you wanted to take a break," she said softly as she approached Shepard's bedside.

He cleared his throat, silencing the soft humming he'd been doing to keep Shepard asleep. "I'm not leaving, but I wouldn't say no to some company."

"Of course." Liara picked up a chair from the far side of the room and set it quietly beside his. They both regarded Shepard for a moment before she asked, "Aria was less than informative when I asked her about Shepard's fantasy world..."

He sighed softly, checking the monitors to be certain that Shepard was in deep REM before he spoke. "It was all very... domestic. Shepard and Kaidan were married, living on her parent's farm, and... expecting their first child it seemed."

Liara smiled gently and her palm rested on his free arm. "Miranda told me that the world was based around Shepard's memories."

Liara bit her lip before he answered. "For the most part, I suppose. Although there was no first contact."

Liara hummed and then she looked from Shepard to him and nodded. "I may know why the architect chose to build Shepard's cage around that particular fantasy. Back at the FOB, before the final push, I gave Shepard the gift of my memories as a way to say goodbye. While we were joined, I happened upon a small secret of hers."

Garrus' stomach lurched as a slew of horrible possibilities flashed through his mind. "Are you saying she... with Kaidan?" Shepard would never do that. Why would she have given Kaidan that note?

Liara cut him off with a soft chuckle and a squeeze of his arm. "No. The exact opposite in fact. It seems that this entire war, all she has been thinking about is retiring and starting a family... With you, Garrus. When you brought up children, she was so excited... It was right on the surface of her thoughts. Without first contact, there was no you, so the one who constructed the fantasy used Kaidan as a substitute."

He sighed and dropped Shepard's hand to stroke her hair. "The one thing I can never biologically give her..."

"She asked me not to tell you, but since we all survived, I think she will forgive me..." Liara began, drawing his attention back to her.

"Listen, Liara, I'm tired, so I think you may have to spell it out for me..." he said, his heart racing.

"Shepard and I might have agreed on a way to bypass biology. I believe I can act as a surrogate for your genes..."

He shook his head in disbelief. "Wait... You can do that? And Shepard agreed?"

"It is not proven science, but she and I are both willing to try, once everything settles down that is..." she smiled.

His subharmonics were a jumble and Shepard stirred under his hand. He turned to see her blinking slowly and taking in her surroundings before wincing and turning her attention to him. When she spoke, her voice was hoarse. "Hey, Big Guy... something wrong?" She reached her hand back out and he took it with his other that he pulled from under Liara's light touch.

He nuzzled her knuckles against his mandible and smiled at her. "No. Nothing is wrong. Definitely not wrong."

Her eyebrows knitted together. "Then why are you crying? Am I dead?"

Liara snickered and he couldn't help the choked laugh that escaped him before he cleared his throat. "No, Shepard. Not dead. Not yet anyway."

"Oh, good," she sighed, closing her eyes again. "There's too much to do to be dead."

When he frowned and glanced at Liara, the Asari smiled. "Miranda has her on a great deal of pain medication."

"Pain... yes. Lots of that," Shepard grunted, her burned arm lifting and her fist clenching.

He switched the soothing coo back on in his chest, quelling the happy keen that had woken her up. "Try and get some more rest, Shepard. You have a long recovery ahead of you."

Her hand unclenched and she whimpered, the other squeezing tightly around his fingers. "Salt water," she whispered. "I'm cold. We need more light down here."

He stroked her hair, her jumble of words making no sense. When she finally calmed, he glanced at Liara. "Would you ask Kaidan to pay Shepard a visit, I need to ask him something."

* * *

 

Shepard's teeth chattered as she wandered down the unfamiliar streets of the Citadel. She hugged herself, the warmth of her hoodie not enough to stave off the bone chilling presence that surrounded her. It was angry because she was herself again, that much she knew. She was searching for the bar. Garrus had promised to meet her there. He had also given her an order. 'Come back alive'. So far, she felt she was doing a poor job.

Sussing out reality from fiction was becoming increasingly difficult as she flip flopped between here and another world full of pain. This world was cold and no matter how much light there was, it never felt bright enough. The lakes on the Presidium smelled like the ocean. They had never smelled like anything before. She lifted her hands and ran frustrated fingers through her hair. "May you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you're dead," she mumbled. "I guess my half hour's up."

There was no other explanation. This world was her death. Somewhere in the 'real' world, she must have been on life support. She remembered small pieces, but this world kept drawing her back in. It opened it's arms to her like a comforting blanket. There was one small problem. This world was lacking the one thing she needed. Garrus. His constant presence anchored her to the pain, kept her fighting. That didn't stop her tormentor from trying to win her over with promises of bliss.

She gritted her teeth and pushed forward. Something here had to give her a clue as to who had wormed their way into her consciousness. She had destroyed the Reapers. Or had she? Was that conversation real? Yes, Garrus had been there. He would never lie to her. So if the Reapers were dead, who was trying to control her? She growled with anger and pounded her fists against her forehead. "Come on! You know the answer! Think, Shepard!"

The names of her torturers flitted across her mind, but didn't stay long enough for her to grasp them. She cursed them and shoved her hands in her pockets before setting off again to look for the bar.

* * *

 

"Her brain actvity is off the charts," Miranda mused as she looked over her equipment. "I don't understand. It's like she's back in the fantasy, but her body is still healing. Whoever got a hold of her is not letting go without a fight."

"I may have an idea who might be doing this," Garrus hummed as Kaidan frowned.

"Why did you ask for me?" the man asked, his arms crossed and his expression quizzical.

"You've spent more time in the field with me and Shepard than anyone else, Kaidan. I need you to think back and see if my suspicions are justified," Garrus said, addressing Kaidan's question.

"I'll do my best, but you know her better than anyone," he said with a shrug.

"This has nothing to do with who knows her better... The last time she woke up, she was pretty out of it, but she said some things that reminded me of something. Saltwater. Cold. Dark... Does that, as you humans say, ring any bells?"

Kaidan's face contorted as he thought and then his eyes widened. "Leviathan?"

Garrus hummed, his suspicions confirmed. "It has the indoctrination ability. And with the Reapers gone, it might be thinking that this is the time to reassert it's Alpha Species status on the galaxy."

"But why would it be messing with Shepard?" Kaidan asked unfolding his arms to sit down in the chair that Liara had pulled up.

"Because she defeated the Reapers? Because it wants her out of the way? It's probably afraid that if she's alive, she will stop it like she stopped the Reapers..." Garrus growled.

"We know where it lives! Let's just go nuke it out of existence," Kaidan suggested.

"You're forgetting that it would take decades to travel that far," Garrus reminded him. "Until the Citadel is repaired, we can't jump start the relay network."

"We don't fully know what Leviathan is capable of..." Kaidan mused, his voice gravely.

"Has Liara gotten the extranet feeds up and running again?"

"By tomorrow she tells me."

"Good. Once they are up, get her on researching _anything_ she can find on Leviathan. Also, I think it's time we contacted the Alliance and let them in on our little secret," he said reluctantly. "As much as I hate the idea, we need their resources."

 


	41. Back in Action

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard is finally on the mend, but things are still weird.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains a few lines copied from Alice's Adventures in Wonderland.

I had been almost a week, if time could be trusted around here. Shepard had found a small apartment as she wandered the Citadel. Her body ached and she found herself wishing she could go back to the painless existence of the Nightmare. There was no Garrus there. That was what kept her here. Fighting. She huddled on a sofa, her arms wrapped around her knees. The tender ache of her left arm reminded her of her injuries just as every breath she took reminded her she'd been shot. An almost constant hum on the air kept her focused on continuing. He was out there. Somewhere.

She'd gone as far as her legs would take her, searching for the source of his voice, but she couldn't break free from the foggy dream. She had come to realize that was where she was. Inside her own head. Outside... Awake meant pain. Her body wasn't ready. That meant she was stuck here for as long as it took for her to heal. Stuck listening to the comforting hum combined with the taunting wrongness of this place. She was inside her head, but she was not alone. There was another here. Hunting her. Chasing her with the nightmare, trying to suck her back in.

A sudden departure of his voice gave her pause. She frowned, unwrapping herself and touching her feet to the floor. If he left, something big was happening. Before she could puzzle it out, a stabbing pain in her side drew a cry from her throat. She unzipped her hoodie and lifted her shirt. There was almost no need as she saw the bright red of her blood already seeping through the white fabric. What the hell was happening? She watched in horror as a strip of her skin lifted away from her body. She had never been squeamish, but the sight made her feel faint. She dropped to the couch, breathing heavily as the searing pain radiated across her nerve endings. It paused briefly and then she felt it again This time on her shoulder. The pain was too much. She cried out and her body twitched away from the source of the pain. Her eyes had been closed. When had that happened?

She opened her eyes and the scene around her set her heart racing. She whimpered as both Miranda and Dr. Chakwas stood over her with bloody scalpels. "Shit! She's waking up. She needs another dose!" Miranda shouted.

"If we dose her again, her body may go into cardiac arrest," Chakwas said calmly.

"If we don't dose her she could go into shock!"

"What's happening?" She groaned, drawing their attention from each other to glance down at her. Her breathing was quick and ragged. "Where's Garrus?"

Miranda's hand fell on her shoulder, lightly. "Shepard, he is right outside in the lobby. We need to cut you out of your armor. Unfortunately he cannot be here while we do that."

Every one of her injuries were clambering for attention. Each one reaching out to her mind and trying to suck her back in to the relatively pain free world of unconsciousness while she was fairly lucid, she needed to tell them... She reached up and gripped Miranda's arm with all her strength. "I'm not alone in here," she hissed through gritted teeth.

Miranda glanced up at Chakwas, worry wrinkling her perfect features. Chakwas drew Shepard's attention. "If we could get you out of this armor, you could begin to fully heal. The faster we can do that, the faster we will be able to get you out."

"You've been in a low grade coma for a week, Shepard. We are doing our best to expedite your healing and get you back to this world, but only so much can be accomplished with our limited resources," Miranda explained.

Shepard sighed, the deep breath cutting into her lungs like a knife. "Do what you need to, but I need Garrus back."

Miranda slipped her arm from Shepard's grip. "We'll send him in as soon as we're finished here," she promised, readying a needle to likely sedate Shepard.

* * *

 

The next time she woke, she felt hardly anything. When she groaned, trying to shake off the groggy feeling behind her eyes, a familiar three fingered hand squeezed her own. "Shepard?"

She hummed, a small smile reaching her lips. "You're back."

He chuckled softly, lifting her arm gently to bring her fingers to his lips. "You didn't think I would miss the chance to see you mummified, did you?"

"How bad is it? I can hardly feel anything," she said, trying to lift her head to get a look at her body.

"That is because Miranda has you on enough medigel to make a Krogan feel giddy." He sighed and rubbed her knuckles with his thumb. Your armor was fused to your skin in a lot of places. Chakwas said it looked like you'd been broiled in your armor?"

She shrugged, the movement tugging on her numb skin. "I nearly ran into Harbinger's laser after the Normandy took off." She remembered the burnt and bloodied soldiers that had fallen around her and closed her eyes to swallow the guilt.

"I can't let you do anything on your own," he said, his tone meant to lighten the mood, but his subharmonics were somber.

"Tell me I didn't dream that the Reapers were dead..." she pleaded as he reached up to stroke her hair.

"Not a dream. The Reapers are gone. For good, we believe," he said with a smile.

"Everything is so muddled and confused. Since the Crucible fired, I can hardly remember anything. Every time I go to sleep, I feel so cold. I'm not alone in my own head Garrus," she confessed.

He nodded. "Kaidan and I have a theory on that, but until we can get in touch with the Alliance, we are working on pure theory. I've got Liara researching, but the extranet can only tell us so much."

She squeezed his hand and tried to sit up. "Who is messing with me, Big Guy? I need to know."

He gently pushed her back to a laying position, his mandibles twitching in concern. "We think it's Leviathan. Without the Reapers, Kaidan and I believe it might be trying to establish it's dominance over the galaxy again."

"Starting with me?" she asked, the theory making sense, but at the same time sounding absurd.

His right mandible lifted away from his cheek as he grinned adoringly at her. She noticed the new scars that peppered his face from the Mako accident in the mad dash for the beam. "Of course it would try to take the destroyer of the Reapers out of the equation. The Reapers were decidedly more powerful than it because of sheer numbers. It has to understand that you are a threat."

She forced a chuckle. "Look at me, Garrus. I'm no threat to anyone..."

He pulled his mandibles close to his face and chuffed his disagreement. "Now that you're free of that armor, you'll be back on your feet in no time."

She sighed and graced him with a bitter smile. "So much for retiring someplace tropical..."

"About that..." he led, shifting awkwardly in his seat. "Liara told me what you two talked about at the FOB..."

"Oh God..." she groaned, closing her eyes and turning her head away from him. "I told her not to say anything until we knew for sure that we were finished."

He dropped her hand and used his talon to gently turn her face back to him. "Shepard, you know I'm not one for false hope, but hearing that you would be willing to let Liara do whatever it is she wants to do to let us have a family together, it gives me one more reason to make sure we all make it through whatever this galaxy throws at us. It's not something to hide from each other." He paused and traced her jawline with his knuckle, the ridges of his skin such a welcome feeling compared to the dull aching of the rest of her body. "When Kaidan gave me that note... I refused to believe it. You know they tried to get me to paste your name on the memorial wall after your ship-wide alert turned over? I couldn't give up on you before knowing for sure... We _will_ beat this. Just like we've beat everything else."

"With sheer luck and bullheadedness?" she chuckled, reaching up her right arm to stroke his mandible like he was stroking her jaw.

"Sure. And I'll be right beside you, helping you do it stylishly, of course," he agreed with a purr from his throat. Suddenly he leaned in and touched his forehead to hers. "I missed you, Shepard." She smiled and relished the Turian kiss before her skin began to complain underneath the bandages. She must have made a subconscious noise or flinched, because he pulled back from her, cocking his head. "You all right?"

She nodded, biting her lip. "Yeah. I think the medigel may be wearing off."

"Do you want me to get Miranda?" he asked.

"No," she shook her head frantically. "I'd rather face the pain than get so drugged up I fall asleep. It's no fun in here right now."

After a short studious look, he masked his concern and sighed. "If you say so, Shepard."

* * *

 

After hours, Shepard finally fell asleep, leaving him to worry on his own. As the medigel wore off, she had become increasingly more ornery. He could smell the stress practically seeping from her pores. She was afraid to be left in her own dreams. Apparently Leviathan still had it's tentacles wrapped around her mind, albeit not quite as tightly. She was herself, her memories were back, but she was scared. He remembered the first time he had smelled fear on her on Asteroid X57. It had never mixed well with her body chemistry. Now that he knew her so well, he knew even she could be afraid, but she never allowed it to compromise her. She was true to herself, no matter what. He had been afraid he'd lost her after the Crucible. He refused to be dragged through that pain again. He would rip Leviathan apart with his bare hands if it meant saving Shepard.

He was snapped from his own thoughts by a soft chirping on his omnitool. He sighed and stood from Shepard's bedside to go outside the room and answer the call. Once in the hall, he flicked open the vid screen and Wrex's scarred face appeared. "Garrus!" Wrex's voice boomed. "How's Shepard?"

"She's healing, physically..." he reported to the grinning Krogan.

The grin shifted to a sneer. "Physically? Is the real problem mental or emotional?"

"A little bit of both," Garrus admitted. "We think that Leviathan is behind everything, but we can't be sure."

"Leviathan? I read about that. The Alliance tried to cover it up, but I've got contacts..."

Garrus sighed. "Stop pretending Liara isn't feeding you information, Wrex. We both know you're buddies with the Shadow Broker."

Wrex chuckled, the sound reverberating off the narrow walls of the hallway. Garrus took a few more steps from Shepard's room, not wanting to wake her. "Sounds like you need a break Vakarian. You're grumpy."

Garrus harrumphed. "Did you call just to check in on Shepard?"

"No," Wrex confirmed. "A few of my scouts managed to find Primarch Victus."

"Is he alive?" Garrus asked, his heart racing with the news.

"He and a few of his men managed to escape London after Shepard's push seemingly failed the first time." Wrex chuckled. "He tells me that an Asari Commando had to punch his lights out so his men could drag him away from the city. Anyway, I thought you should know he wants to speak with you."

Garrus' chest rumbled. What could the Primarch want with him? "Have him contact the Normandy. I'll set up a meeting."

"Will do... Oh, and Grunt asked me to give his battlemaster his best."

"Sure thing. I'll tell her when she wakes up," he agreed before Wrex disconnected.

* * *

 

Garrus sat across the table from Victus, his mandibles shuddering with nerves and curiosity. It had been a week since Wrex's call. Victus had been checked into a hospital in the city before he was given the all clear to travel out to meet with Garrus. He had a few broken ribs that were healing on their own, but no other damage.

Victus sat with his elbows on the table and his fingers steepled in front of his face. Garrus swallowed his subharmonics to hide as much of his feelings from the Primarch as possible. He still wasn't certain why the Primarch had wanted to see him, but he felt like he was on display as he sat stiffly in the chair opposite him. "I'm sure you're curious as to why I wanted to see you, Vakarian."

"Am I that obvious?" he asked, trying to play it cool.

Victus sighed and dropped his palms to the table. "Throughout my time as Primarch, I took a lot of advice from you. Your tactical skills were unmatched when it came to this war. I know a good soldier when I see one and I know an even better politician when I smell one."

Garrus jerked his subvocals back as they threatened to mock the Primarch. "I may be able to read a war, Primarch, but I'm no politician."

"Your... relationship... with Commander Shepard tells me that you are well versed in reading not only your own kind, but other races in the galaxy. I need someone who can sit in a room full of aliens and make informed decisions," Victus mused with a tilt of his head that said he had seen Garrus' not so subtle display of affection at the FOB.

Garrus cleared his throat and again reigned in his subharmonics, carefully not letting anything incriminating slip. "What exactly are you alluding to, Primarch?" Garrus asked bluntly.

"When the Citadel fell to the Reapers, the council suffered. Both Irissa and Quentius were killed before they could escape to the Ascension. With repairs underway on the Citadel, it is time we rebuild the Council again. The Turians could use a representative with your talent for inter-special relations..."

Garrus was already shaking his head before Victus could even finish his sentence. "With all due respect, Primarch. I would make a terrible representative for the Turians."

The Primarch hummed deep in his chest. Garrus heard amusement. "I would have said the same thing of myself. Then they went and made me Primarch. I would appreciate it if you would at least consider my offer, Vakarian. Our people need a representative who can get us through these tough times, not some self minded politician."

Garrus snorted. "You can give me as much time as you like to consider, Primarch, but at this point in time, there is too much that needs my attention for me to drop it all and sit around a table and discuss the state of the galaxy."

The Primarch hummed again, his expression turning to one of mild disappointment. "I see." He stood from his seat and Garrus followed suit, standing to salute his Primarch which the man waved off before stepping outside the glass walled room and joining his small guard to leave the Normandy. "I hope you'll reconsider, Garrus. Your father would be proud to have a son on the council."

As soon as the Primarch was out of earshot, Garrus exhaled, his subvocals rumbling his displeasure. No way was he leaving Shepard to fight Leviathan while he lounged on the Citadel in a useless position that his talents would be wasted on. The Primarch was grasping. After this war, there were not that many high ranking Turians left that would be suitable for a council position and even fewer in the sector to actually do anything. A day ago, they had managed to contact the Alliance and he had personally spoken with Admiral Hackett. They had agreed that Hackett would send the original Crucible scientists back to the system to help with rebuilding the Citadel and possibly getting the relay network up and running again. If they managed that, they would have plenty of Turians to ask to sit on the council.

He stomped his way back from the Normandy to the clinic where inch by inch, Shepard was recovering. He slapped aside the nylon curtains and stepped in her room. She was sitting up, a chess board set up on her lap. Traynor sat at her side chuckling as she took Shepard's Queen. Shepard looked up at his entrance and her eyes narrowed. "It looks like things went well with the Primarch," she said sarcastically as she fruitlessly slid her bishop to check Traynor's King.

He hummed and then crossed his arms. "What is it you always say? Things went peachy?"

Shepard snorted as Traynor rolled over her bishop and won the game. "I am holed up in a hospital bed and you can't even let me win just once?" She complained as Traynor gathered the board with a smug look on her face.

"I have too much pride to just _let_ you win, Commander," Traynor said confidently. "I'll be back next week. You can try your luck again."

"Don't you mean skill?" Shepard asked, her left eyebrow slightly raised.

"I know what I said," Traynor chuckled.

Shepard pursed her lips and shooed the woman with a chuckle. After Traynor disappeared, she turned her full attention on him. Her scrutiny almost made him nervous. "So? What did Victus want?"

Garrus grumbled in his subvocals as he approached her bedside to sit in his usual chair. She shifted her position and cringed as the movement strained one of her injuries. After a short hiss which he responded to by cocking his head, she waved him on, settling into her new position. "Well..." he cleared his throat. "Apparently our relationship did not go unnoticed by the Primarch."

"You weren't exactly subtle at the FOB," she teased with a mild smirk. The expression couldn't hide her concern. "Us being together won't get you in trouble with your people, will it?"

"No," he said with a chuckle. "Nothing like that... The Primarch sees my affinity for other races an asset which he would like to employ by making _me_ the new Turian councilor."

She frowned as she read his vocals and studied his face carefully. "He's not wrong," she said carefully.

He snorted. "Excuse me? I'm sorry, my translator must have glitched. Did you just agree that I should take on the responsibility of being a councilor?"

She shrugged, cringing again. "Maybe not right now, but we can't be rogue Spectres and failed C-Sec agents forever." she sighed. He could feel her distaste for what she was saying even as she said it. She didn't like the idea any more than he did. Why was she even agreeing? "This galaxy will need people in charge who can make peace, not grab for power. The ones with the least ambition should be the ones to take over."

"We both know that's a fool's errand, Shepard. You tried that with Anderson and the rest of the council overruled him and did whatever they pleased anyway," he reminded her.

She tilted her head back and closed her eyes, sighing. "Listen to me talking crazy. It must be this bed."

"Yes, Shepard. The bed... that's definitely the thing making you talk crazy," he teased, gently lifting her hospital gown and dropping it back on her shoulder where it had slipped from.

"We're all mad here," she said whimsically, her lips spreading in a wide grin and her hands flapping dramatically.

He cocked his head and his mandibles flared as he tried to flesh out what she meant. "I think I missed out on that joke, Shepard."

"It's from a book." Her grin faded and her hands dropped. "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. It was my favorite when I was a kid. My father used to read me a chapter every night." Her gaze became distant and her eyes glistened. He recognized the far off look of a painful memory.

He reached out and took the hand that rested limply in her lap. "What was it like... seeing them again?" he asked softly.

She clutched his hand. "Even though my memories told me that they were real, my instincts never really accepted them, you know? They were like a dream inside my dream. The same way my mind kept telling me that Kaiden's eyes were the wrong color," She reached out with her free hand and cupped his cheek, her thumb tracing gently over the painted skin just below his eye. "I missed your eyes the most."

His mandibles flared in a smile before she leaned down, flinching as she bent at the waist, likely pinching her gunshot wound and touched her forehead to his. He stood from the chair so she didn't have to bend and she lifted her arms to wrap them around his neck. He lightly wrapped his arms around her to hug her close. "I missed all of you." he whispered, losing himself in her scent as she tucked her head close to his face and he inhaled the gentle fragrance of her shampoo.

* * *

 

"I need out of this bed, Miranda," Shepard complained for what felt like the fiftieth time that morning.

Miranda smirked and repeated her rejection. "You are in no shape to be wandering around, no matter how good you might feel. You're still healing."

"Then find me a wheelchair... I can't take this room anymore. It smells like... hospital." She wrinkled her nose.

"Listen, I've already allowed Garrus to bring you clothes. You're lucky you're getting away with that much. Chakwas wanted you in the gown until you were healed fully so we would have easy access to your bandages," Miranda chided. "Give it another week and I'll _consider_ letting you start your physical therapy."

"You're such a hardass, Lawson," Shepard grunted, crossing her arms.

"Remember who controls your pain medication, Shepard," Miranda said with a teasing lilt in her Australian accent. She patted Shepard's shoulder as she turned to leave the room.

Garrus appeared in the doorway moments later and she grinned slyly. "Let's go for a walk," she suggested, throwing the blankets off her legs.

"Uh, uh, uh," he chided. "I don't think so, Shepard. Miranda already told me you've been itching to get out of here. She also told me that under no circumstances was I to allow you to leave."

"Et tu, Garrus?" she whined. "Traitor." She crossed her arms and pouted. "What if there was a fire. We'd have to leave then," she suggested.

"Which is why Liara confiscated your omnitool yesterday," he said with a sympathetic chuckle.

She rubbed her wrist where her omnitool usually rested and sighed. "This sucks."

He hummed, drawing her attention. "I may not be able to spring you, but I brought you something to pass the time." He held up a data pad and moved to sit in his chair.

"It's not from Joker's stash is it?" she joked, resigning herself to another day confined to the bed.

"Not to my knowledge. Now get comfortable." He reached over and fluffed her pillow, letting her lean back and rest her head against the headboard. Then he sat back in the chair and propped his feet up on the edge of her bed. After fiddling with a few commands on the datapad, he cleared his throat and began to read. "Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on the bank, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no pictures or conversations in it, `and what is the use of a book,' thought Alice `without pictures or conversation?'..."

"You didn't," she gasped, her heart fluttering and her eyes burning.

He looked up from the datapad to gauge her reaction then smiled. "Of course I did. Now relax and focus on healing while I lull you to complacency with my voice," he teased, knowing exactly how much she loved listening to him speak.

"I can't argue with that," she sighed, rolling to her side so she could not only hear him, but watch him as well. He began to read again, the gentle ebb and flow of his deep voice captivating her more than the story itself.

* * *

 

Shepard opened her eyes and looked around. Her cheek was pressed to the floor of a large dark room. She groaned as her surroundings coalesced around her and she realized what her tormentor had done. She pushed up to her hands and knees and spoke to her invisible captor. "You know, this would be much more challenging if you didn't use my own memories to try and trap me."

As she got to her feet, the gentle gnawing of her phantom injuries in her subconscious made her cringe. There was a familiar murmuring in the back of her skull, telling her that Garrus was still reading out in the real world. Even though she couldn't quite make out his words, the reminder let her draw strength and put one foot in front of the other.

Upon inspection, the room was exactly like she expected it to look. Large dark and short an exit, save for a tiny door on the floor by her feet. She turned and saw the table set up behind her. Sure enough there was a phial of liquid and a tiny cake, each labeled in a careful script. _Eat Me, Drink Me._ She sighed at the dream's inability to even be creative. She was sleeping and she was safe beside Garrus in the outside world. Why play the games that Leviathan set up for her? If she had learned anything from Samara while the Justicar lived on the Normandy, it was how to meditate. She folded her legs under her and sat on the floor. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and concentrated on Garrus' deep rumbling voice. His words began filtering into the dark room as she slowly inhaled and exhaled and pulled his warmth to her in the cold. " _...hadn't mentioned Dinah!' she said to herself in a melancholy tone. `Nobody seems to like her, down here, and I'm sure she's the best cat in the world! Oh, my dear Dinah! I wonder if I shall ever see you any more!' And here poor Alice began to cry again, for.._."

Shepard gasped, her chest tightening as she ripped herself from the dream. When her eyes flew open, she attempted to sit up much too quickly and her gunshot wound helpfully reminded her that she was back in her bed, an extremely concerned Turian hovering over her, the datapad he'd been reading from abandoned to clatter onto the floor. She clutched her side, the pain spiking out from the hole in her flesh to run in tendrils of sharp angry pinpricks along her abdomen. "Son of a pyjak!" she cursed, writhing as Garrus' hand found her shoulder to help her stay still.

"What is it, Shepard?" he asked, his eyes flooded with what looked like fear, his mandibles fluttering as he tried to figure out how to help.

She swallowed the pain and remembered to breathe. "I'm alright," she sighed. "I'm sorry."

"Spirits, Shepard, I thought you were having a fit. What happened?" he asked, his voice soft as his panic subsided.

"I must have dozed off while you were reading... Leviathan... I meditated my way out."

He came as close to pursing his lips as a Turian could, his mandibles hugging his cheeks before he cocked his head and allowed his mandibles free reign to spread in an adoring smile. His talons traced her chin. "You can't even meditate quietly..."

She chuckled around another sharp pain in her side. "The fact that I can meditate at all is a miracle. I call it a win."

Just then, Chakwas entered the room and glanced between the two of them. "Do I even want to know why your monitors were all just screaming bloody murder?"

Shepard looked away from Garrus and bit her lip. "I had a nightmare, and I may or may not have pulled a stitch or two open when I woke up."

Chakwas sucked her teeth and sighed. "Let me have a look."

* * *

 

Shepard's toes dangled inches from the floor. She gripped the mattress tightly as she breathed through the spike of fear and excitement that came with Miranda announcing that she was allowed to get up. She glanced at the wheelchair that Chakwas had managed to scrounge up on a trip into London. Miranda hovered to her left and Garrus to her right. His subvocals practically buzzed with encouraging excitement to see her getting back on her feet. All of her monitors and IV's had been removed and she was ready. "I guess it's now or never," she mumbled, glaring at the wheelchair and hoping she wasn't going to need it. She slid gently off the high bed and her toes hit the cold tile of the floor beneath her, followed by her heels. She still leaned gently against the bed as her person shaped crutches hovered. With a deep sigh, she pushed her butt away from the uncomfortable mattress and then released her iron grip with her hands to stand up straight. "Oh that's not so ba.... whoa..." The room took off around her and she found herself snuggled against Garrus' warm chest, his arms wrapped around her.

"Maybe a bit slower, Shepard. You're still highly anemic. Dizziness is expected," Miranda coached from not far away.

Garrus propped her back on her feet as she felt the blood returning to her cheeks. "Thanks for the warning," she breathed as she slowly pushed away from him and attempted to stand on her own. She was suddenly cold, her teeth nearly chattering as she left the warm halo that surrounded him. "What's a girl gotta do to get a pair of socks around here?" she asked, her voice strained as she tried to stand still and not let the room run off again. Her peripheral vision blackened momentarily and she closed her eyes and breathed steadily. When she felt comfortable, she opened her lids and held her hand out to Garrus who immediately took it and stepped slightly in front of her. The first step she took was a doozy, making the room around her sway a little but she swallowed the dizziness and forced herself forward another shuffling step. Her feet refused to fully lift off the floor as her weak legs wobbled underneath her. She had to pause and chuckle after the fifth step. She couldn't help but think she probably looked like the Little Mermaid after the sea witch gave her new legs. She glanced at Miranda with a grin and said, "I need a dinglehopper, a tone deaf seagull, and a judgmental singing crab..."

Miranda pursed her lips before cracking a smile. "I believe Ursula took Ariel's voice before giving her those wobbly legs, Shepard. Try concentrating on the task at hand."

"Spoil sport," Shepard snorted.

She made it all of the way to the wheelchair without passing out, so she called it a win in spite of the exertion draining all of the blood she had stored, making her even colder and mildly exhausted. Garrus grabbed one of the blankets from the bed and wrapped it around her shuddering shoulders. She thanked him silently with a gentle smile. "Have you had enough?" he asked her softly as he knelt in front of her.

She shook her head slowly, her equilibrium returning. "Take me home, Garrus...?"

His mandibles pulled tightly to his cheeks before he glanced at Miranda. The woman's arms were crossed and her hips cocked disapprovingly. "Shepard, I don't think..."

"I can't stay here, Miranda. I need out. Fresh air is good, right?" Shepard pleaded, her shoulders slumping as she thought Miranda was going to stick her back in that awful bed.

After more than a few tense moments while Miranda's eyes traveled appraisingly up and down her person, she finally sighed. "The Normandy's med bay should have all of the equipment I'll need to finish your recovery..."

If she had been at full strength, Shepard would have jumped up and hugged Miranda. "Seriously?!"

Miranda nodded. "When you get there, please send Kaiden and James to help me lug some equipment, and don't do anything rash that may make me change my mind," she warned.

Shepard could barely contain the massive grin that had spread across her face. She looked back at Garrus who was smiling almost as big as she was. "Take me home," she said again, her tone urgent.

"As my Commander wishes," he said with an awkward bow before hurrying behind the wheelchair and starting toward the door.

"One more thing," Miranda called after them before he could push her through the nylon flaps.

She groaned. "Seconds from a clean getaway." She turned in her chair to see Miranda holding up a pair of socks. "On second thought, thank you."

After Miranda slipped the cozy socks onto her feet, she was finally able to escape the room she'd been trapped in for months. She huddled into the blanket and sat back, allowing Garrus to do all of the work. The hallway was short and it spilled into a lobby that housed a few meandering mercs. "Aria's people," Garrus rumbled. "They seem to have temporarily set up shop here until we solve the relay situation."

Shepard yawned, her short walk to the chair having sapped her energy. "I'll bet Aria is itching to get back to Omega."

He hummed in agreement. "She's as trapped as you are right now."

"One step at a time," she mused as they exited the building into the spring breeze. Shepard took a deep breath, the warm air dragging her hair over her face. She pushed it back and glanced around at the bright sky and the blooming flowers all around. "It looks like a whole different planet," she gasped, noticing the distinct lack of dark clouds that the Reapers presence had drawn over the world almost as soon as they'd arrived. Their arrival had literally been a dark day for Earth.

"I like Earth better in the spring, Shepard. Just for future reference," he chuckled.

"Everyone hates winter, Big Guy," she said, a smile crossing her face. "Maybe once all of this shit with Leviathan is over, you can take me to Palaven and show me the sights."

"It would be good to see home again," he agreed. "Introduce you to Sol..."

"Meeting the family," she teased. "I must be important."

He chuckled. "I said Sol... not dad. I'm not certain he's ready to know his son has chosen a SPECTRE as his mate."

"I'll have you know, I'm more than just a SPECTRE... I'm a human and a war hero..." she teased. Her tone said she was teasing him, but inside, her heart was skipping a mile a minute.

"Everything all right?" he asked, both his exceptional hearing and his visor likely picking up on the change in her heart-rate.

"Fine," she assured him, tilting her head back to look up at him as he walked behind her chair. "It just never gets old to hear you talk like that... Makes a girl's heart all fluttery." His steps slowed and he leaned down to bump her forehead with his. "What you said... On the field as the Normandy was ready to take off... You almost made me turn around and abandon the war."

"Hmm? What was it I said?" His tone teased. "A Mako had just fallen on me. I was pretty delusional..."

"You know exactly what I mean, you jerk..." she said with a huff, crossing her arms.

He chuckled and started walking again, pushing her over a small crest in the road. The Normandy came into view and she had never been more excited to see the damned hunk of metal. Sensing her excitement, his stride quickened. "Well, I figured if I was never going to see you again, I might as well let you hear it."

"I knew you did. I didn't need to hear it... but it was nice," she admitted as she heard his subharmonics saying it again.

"I think I never say it because, even after all of this time, I'm not sure why you chose me, and if I say it out loud, I feel like I'm setting myself up for the Universe to knock me back down," he sighed.

"We'll save it for special occasions then," she said, unable to bring herself to disagree with him. Every time she found herself blissfully happy, something came along to put her back in her place. Even now, they were both alive, the Galaxy was saved from the Reapers, but in the deep recesses of her mind, Leviathan still hummed its intent. She gritted her teeth, wishing she had never gone to Despoina. She should have left the bastard buried in it's ocean cave.

"Something's bothering you," he hummed, snapping her back from her thoughts.

"Will we ever be finished?" she asked, picking at the dregs of ruined polish still clinging to her fingernails.

"Well," he grunted. "I suppose that all depends on if we can get the relay network back up and running. The Crucible team should be arriving with Hackett tomorrow. Tali is going to go with them to survey the damage and they're all going to put their heads together to see if they can't repair the relays. There are a lot of 'ifs', I know, but it's all we have right now."

"I want to help," she said. "I spoke to the Catalyst. Maybe I know how to help without knowing I know..."

"One step at a time, Shepard. You went white as a sheet earlier when you stood up. Let's focus on healing you before you try to heal the Galaxy, hmm?" he said, only half teasing.

* * *

 

Garrus wheeled her up the ramp into the shuttle bay and Shepard's spirits lifted higher than they had been in weeks. She felt at home. At a glance, James was in his usual place, fiddling with a few weapons in the armory and Cortez was safe and sound in his corner, messing around with the drive core in the Kodiak. As they passed into the shade cast by the ship, James noticed them and turned to see who'd snuck up on them. The last she'd seen of James was at the FOB before they headed out. He'd not come to visit her in the hospital. When he saw her, his wide grin was only matched by her own. "Hey, Lola. Good to see you."

"James... glad to see you're safe..." she returned.

"Hey, sorry I didn't come see you sooner. I uh... I really don't do hospitals," he stammered, his cheeks flushing under his already dark complexion.

"That's okay, Lieutenant. I hate hospitals too. I'll find a suitable punishment later for those who didn't suffer with me."

He chuckled. "Once you're up for it, I'll let you take me down in the ring again, Lola."

"You're on, Vega," she said and Garrus started forward again. Steve smiled and waved as they passed and Garrus pushed the elevator's call button. "Where's Tali?" she asked as they waited.

"Most likely," he shrugged. "The AI core. She and EDI have been working day and night trying to get EDI's body to work again."

"Is that why I haven't seen her?" she asked.

"She stopped by once in the early days, but you were still out of commission. She and Reegar have been spending a lot of time together while she takes her breaks," he alluded.

"You mean Kal'Reegar? He's on the Normandy?" she asked curiously.

Garrus nodded. "We picked him up when we ran into his ship on the way back here. He offered to help us repair our QEC. I think he really accepted the transfer to be closer to our Miss Vas Normandy."

Shepard chuckled. "I'm glad to see she's over her crush on you, Big Guy."

Garrus' mandibles flared comically as the elevator doors opened. "Her.... me?" he asked.

"Don't worry. I know of at least 3 women on the Normandy who've had their eyes on you at one point or another. You're a very popular Turian, Garrus Vakarian." She teased as he gathered them both onto the elevator. "I believe Chambers' exact words were, 'I just want to hold him close and whisper everything will be alright'." His subvocals grumbled in embarrassment. "Of course, that was before I fully realized how I felt about the matter."

"And what did you say to her?" he asked.

It was her turn to flush in embarrassment. "I'm pretty sure I said. 'I know what you mean'..."

He chuckled out loud. "So even before our conversation about reach and flexibility, you were entertaining thoughts about me?"

She snorted. "Even before Horizon. It was a very confusing time for me."

The elevator doors slid open and a shrill excited voice filtered in. "Shepard! You're back!"

The small Quarian flung herself into Shepard's lap, hugging her as close as she could in the awkward position. Shepard laughed, wrapping her arms around Tali and returning the enthusiastic hug. "It's good to see you too, Tali."

"I've missed you so much... I wanted to come more often and see you, but....." The girl continued to ramble as they moved in a group toward the mess hall, her hands and voice both going a mile a minute. Shepard tried to keep up, but her mind was exhausted. She wanted to see all of her people and then take a nap.

She glanced around the mess as the crew went about their business around her. Liara gave Shepard a warm smile and a half nod before returning her attention back to Javik who was speaking quietly over a data pad. Garrus leaned down so his mandibles touched her cheek as he spoke. "By the way, _that_ is happening."

"Get out!" she hissed, turning to glance at him in disbelief. "You're serious?!"

"For months now," Tali agreed, seeing what they were talking about and nodding.

"Geez, I leave you people alone for a few months and everyone starts hooking up," Shepard said with a chuckle. "Garrus, you are the worst gossiper ever. I should have known this all straight away."

"I'm pretty sure you had better things to think about," he chided with a grin.

* * *

 

Shepard did not envy Brynn. While she laid in her new hospital bed in the med bay, she stared at the ceiling and listened to Jacob snoring. The soft humming of EDI's core was mildly soothing, but not as much as it would have been to be up in their cabin with Garrus beside her. She sighed deeply and tried to close her eyes. A moment later, EDI's voice slipped lightly through the bedside speaker. "Is everything all right Shepard?"

She had not had time with the AI since she'd returned. She rolled to her side to make eye contact with the small globe like Avatar that EDI had reverted to since her body stopped working. "I should be asking you that, EDI. I am so sorry."

The AI was silent as she thought about Shepard's words. "Did you know I could be brought back online?"

Shepard cringed at the mild accusation. "I hoped..."

More silence followed and Shepard sighed again, thinking EDI had decided that her answer was insufficient. "May I ask you a question, Shepard?" she said finally, startling Shepard.

"Is it a big or a small one?" She asked with a bitter chuckle as a tear escaped her eye.

EDI ignored the attempt at humor and continued. "I was hoping you might recount what happened to you inside the Citadel after the fleet lost communication..."

"You want to hear about the catalyst and how it worked?" Shepard asked softly.

"Yes," EDI responded simply.

"The short answer is, I was selfish. I chose the only course of action that would not directly lead to my own death. All I had was the hope that 'maybe' we could bring you and the Geth back. I didn't know for sure. I chose my own life over all synthetic life, and now I feel awful. I wish I could take it back..."

The AI was silent for a long time. "I don't."

"What?" Shepard asked, not certain she had heard correctly.

"I don't wish you could take it back. The Reapers needed to be destroyed. I have run several million scenarios over and over, the only viable outcome to preserve the Galaxy was the Reapers' demise. The Illusive Man spoke of control. Even if it were possible, the masses would never have accepted the Reapers as allies and another war would have begun."

"I had a third option," Shepard admitted sadly. "Synthesis."

"Synthesis?" EDI asked skeptically. Shepard explained it just as the young boy had explained it to her. "So organic and synthetic would have been one?"

"Essentially,"she said with a sigh.

"Do not feel bad for choosing your own life over the death of individuality, Shepard," EDI said. "Challenge and unpredictability are some of the most important aspects of life. Without evolution, the Galaxy would grow stagnant."

"So you don't hate me for being selfish?" Shepard asked.

"Fix my body and then we'll talk," EDI purred, a joking lilt in her voice.

"I'm still sorry," Shepard said again.

"To err is human..." EDI quoted, then her avatar disappeared.

Another heavy sigh escaped Shepard's lungs to swirl unheard through the med bay over Jacob's snores. She still couldn't sleep, so she checked the time on her omnitool. It was still early for Garrus so she quickly typed out a message to him. _Come bust me out of here and I'll pay you in snuggles._

It was a few moments before he responded and she hoped he hadn't already been asleep. He'd been spending a lot of time off the ship lately keeping her company late into the night. _I have been warned strongly against such behavior, Shepard._

She sighed and sent him another message. _You're the acting Captain... Pull rank?_

His next message came immediately following hers. _I was already on the elevator when I sent that..._

She had to refrain from laughing out loud so she didn't wake Jacob. She sat up and reached to the chair beside her bed that her hoodie had been lovingly folded and set on. She slipped into the comforting familiarity of her favorite garment and took a moment to bury her nose in it. It had started to take on a hint of Garrus and she realized he had probably clung to that damned thing like it was his last link to her. The med bay doors swished open softly and he stood there with his arms crossed. Shepard glanced at the wheelchair and sneered. She looked back at him and slowly swung her legs over the side of the bed. He was at her side in seconds and she as quietly as possible tried to stand. After she didn't immediately feel faint she cheered on the inside. "Progress," she muttered.

"Do you want me to get the chair?" he asked as softly as his voice allowed.

"No," she hissed. "Just let me lean on you."

With a rumble from his subharmonics, he held out his arm and she took it, shuffling away from the edge of the bed. With his help, they made it out of the med bay and almost to the elevator before there was a pointed clearing of someone's throat. She groaned and they both turned to see Kaiden standing with his arms crossed in the doorway of the starboard observation. His hair was tousled and he was shirtless, indicating he had probably woken up to use the restroom or grab a midnight snack like they had done many times while they'd been together. "Tell me what I should do here, Shepard," he said with a smirk.

She reached over and subtly pressed the button to call the elevator. The doors almost immediately opened since Garrus had just come down. "Pretend this never happened and I'll give you all of Donnely's tells for Skillian 5," she pleaded.

His lips pressed together. "You don't need to bribe me, Shepard." He reached up and ran his hands through his messy hair. "Just go."

"Thank you," she sighed and tugged Garrus onto the elevator with her. After the doors closed, her shoulders sagged and she leaned heavily on Garrus' arm. "That was close."

"Are you sure you're up for this?" he asked, his concern reflected in his chest.

"I'm not getting any sleep down there," she sighed. "I need to be in my own space, with you beside me."

"You know if Miranda doesn't flay us both, Chakwas is probably going to do it for her, right?" he asked with a chuckle.

"Quicker than dying slowly from lack of rest," she pointed out as the elevator opened up into her small entryway. Garrus quickly entered the door code and led her inside. She glanced around and saw that all of her things were all almost exactly where she left them. A contented sigh escaped her lips as she settled back into her familiar space. "Thank you for coming to get me. I think convincing Kaidan to let me go would have taken a lot more than poker cheats if I'd crawled up on my own."

"I'm certain you're right," he said, catching her as she swayed on her feet and then swiftly picking her up and carrying her to the bed.

"Don't manhandle me," she chuckled, as the dizzy spell wore off and she was able to open her eyes.

He was kneeling at her bedside, his fingers combing through her hair with that adoring smile on his face again. "You've never complained before."

"Keep talking like that and you'll make a girl swoon," she said with a yawn. She patted the bed beside her and he easily climbed over her to join her. He slipped his arm under her and she snuggled into his warmth as he pulled the blankets over them. His open palm rested carefully over her hip and she felt herself almost immediately slipping away.

* * *

 

Blissful, uninterrupted sleep. For the first time since the Crucible, Shepard got a full night's rest in her own mind without the irritating attempts to drag her down that Leviathan kept throwing her way. It was why she groaned at 6 AM when the comms at her bedside flared to life. "Garrus! Is Shepard up there with you?" Miranda's tone was more than irritated.

Garrus' subharmonics rumbled in his own irritation. "Yes, Miranda. She's safe."

"Shepard, I need you back down here. Now." The comms clicked off and the room went quiet.

"Who does she think she is?" Shepard snarked angrily as Garrus grudgingly pulled away from her, leaving her back cold.

"The woman who has saved your life twice?" he suggested with a smirk.

"When you put it that way..." she said, her eyes rolling.

He helped her to her feet and she felt much stronger than she had the day before. She barely needed to hold his hand as they made their way back down to the med bay. Miranda was waiting inside as they passed through the doors, her hands on her hips and those hips cocked in annoyance. "You should not be putting so much strain on your implants, Shepard. They are barely in working condi...." When Miranda paused, taking in Shepard and her ability to be standing on her own, her jaw fell open. Her defensive posture eased and she gestured toward Shepard's side. "May I?" Shepard stepped forward and lifted her clothes to expose the bandage that was covering her gunshot wound. Miranda gingerly picked at the tape holding it down and lifted the bandage up to examine Shepard's stitches. "This is extraordinary." she gasped, her fingers gently prodding. Shepard barely felt a thing where a few days ago, she had popped stitches. "This is a huge change from yesterday. What happened?"

"I slept. Through the night," Shepard pointed out. "No dreams and no visitors."

Miranda glanced up from her prodding and frowned. "You can't tell me that you believe that a good night's sleep closed up your wound..."

"With help from my implants, sure... remember what Chakwas said about my outlook on life affecting the healing of my scars? Being in my own space, surrounded by familiar things, it made me comfortable. I was not sleeping right in that hospital or even here in the med bay."

"I'll need to do a full examination," Miranda insisted.

Shepard sighed and turned to Garrus. "Could I ask you to get me breakfast while she probes me? I'm starving."

He grinned. "Miranda gets all of the fun." He left them to their examination.

With an accusing glare, Miranda held her palm out for Shepard to climb up on the bed. "You're likely hungry because your implants are taxed to capacity."

"All the more reason to get this exam over with so I can go and eat," Shepard said. "I need to get better so I can start helping to fix what I broke."

"You didn't break anything, Shepard. You saved the bloody Galaxy," Miranda chided.

"She's right, you know," Jacob called out from the other side of the privacy curtain between their beds.

"I've been informed of the state of things. I'm pretty sure I broke a few things," she sighed.

"I get to watch my son grow up because of what you did, Shepard. And I'm not the only person who can say that," Jacob continued.

"You get to meet him today, don't you?" she asked with a grin as Miranda helped her out of her shirt and began to look over every wound she had. "I'm sorry you didn't get to see him arrive."

Jacob chuckled. "Brynn tells me she had the whole thing recorded. I don't get to miss that."

"I'm glad you talked her out of naming him Shepard," she joked. "It's a very unlucky name."

"Yeah, you know, I feel bad for any of your kids..." Jacob joked. He was unable to see her face, but Miranda saw the quickly wiped away expression of hurt as it was again rubbed in that she would probably never have her own children. At least not ones with Garrus' beautiful blue eyes. She looked away from Miranda as the woman gave her hand a quick squeeze of reassurance.

"Hey, I'm a woman. I don't have to saddle them with my name," she said, hiding the tone of her voice behind humor.

The conversation petered out as Miranda continued her examination. When she finished she crossed her arms in defeat. "I can't explain it, but it looks like your wounds are all healing at the rate they used to back before your implants shut down. I wouldn't recommend any rigorous physical activity for at least another week so I can monitor the situation, but I can't confine you here if you don't wish to stay. Listen to your body, Shepard. If you feel like something is wrong, come to me straight away."

"So I'm free to go?" she asked in near disbelief.

"As long as you take it easy. Don't let me catch you sparring with Vega or... whatever it is you and Garrus get up to in your free time. Please." Miranda chided.

Shepard hopped down from the bed and grinned. "I am going to go eat a ridiculous amount of food. Jacob, would you like me to bring you anything?"

He shook his head as she passed. "After my examination, Chakwas assures me I should be allowed to get out of this bed today. She found me a pair of crutches and everything."

"Good luck," Shepard said, patting the end of his bed before making a quick exit before Miranda changed her mind.

As the doors closed behind her, she sighed in relief. She glanced around and saw a few people sitting by Garrus in the mess and she made her way over to join the group. "You look better than you have in weeks, Shepard. There's goddamn color back in your cheeks," Zaeed commented as she sat down beside Garrus.

"Everything good?" Garrus asked, sliding her a plate with an omelette and a side of bacon. She glanced up and saw James hard at work at the omelette bar. She nodded her thanks as she caught his eye. He saluted her with his spatula and grinned widely.

She picked up her fork and cut into the omelette. Before putting the bite in her mouth, she said, "Miranda says my implants have all started working again. She can't explain it."

"Sounds like magical fairy bullshit if you ask me," Jack shrugged, her own pile of food making Shepard wonder where the tiny biotic packed it all.

"Whatever it is," Liara said softly. "It's good to see you well again, Shepard."

Garrus' subvocals purred along with her own excitement. "It's good to feel good again," she agreed, shoveling food in her mouth. "When are the Alliance ships due today?"

Kaidan frowned. "Should you be worrying about that? You just got back on your feet..."

She waved her fork dismissively as she chewed and swallowed, suddenly remembering her manners over her hunger. "I can't sit idly any more. I'm starting to get twitchy. As long as I don't do anything too vigorous, Miranda says I should be fine."

Liara sighed. "According to my reports, Hackett and the rest of the fleet should be arriving this afternoon."

"Is there any word on the state of the rest of the Galaxy?" she asked, throwing herself at the problem head on and hoping they might give her an idea on where to start. Garrus opened his mouth to say something, but she quickly interrupted as she realized he was picking at half a ration bar while she and the others scarfed down their meals. "What about the dextro situation in the sector?"

Liara cleared her throat, drawing Shepard's attention away from Garrus. "The Normandy's stores are running low. I reached out locally with Aria's help and was able to strike a deal with a nearby crashed Turian frigate. They can get us another two months worth of rations for our three dextros, but there aren't many other options."

"Are there any chemists among those scientists arriving today?" Shepard asked.

"I'm not sure," Liara said frowning.

"We need to find out as soon as they arrive. If they have anyone that might be able to whip up some sort of dietary supplements for all of the dextros that are stuck away from their homeworlds, we need to get them on that," she said, then immediately pressed her lips together. "I'm sorry," she said, glancing at Garrus.

His brow plates pressed together in a frown. "What for?"

"Stepping on your toes," she sighed. "Technically, you're still in command here."

He shook his head quickly. "By all means. This is your ship, Shepard. You give the orders."

"Good morning, everyone," Joker said as he limped into sight from around the elevator wall. "Hey! Shepard! You're out of medical. You look good. Sorry I didn't get to visit you..." He indicated his person.

He was about to sit down when James yelled over his shoulder at him. "You better come over here and get your breakfast pendejo. I'm not a waiter."

Joker groaned as he moved around the table to the kitchen. "Why should I have to work for eggs?" James cursed at him in Spanish and Shepard chuckled.

"I guess some things really never change," she said. She shoveled another forkful into her mouth and swatted Zaeed's hand as he reached for her bacon. "I will bite your fingers, Massani."

Jack snorted around her coffee and Kaidan chuckled. "She's not lying. Never try to take food from Shepard... or tell her she can't have hot sauce."

* * *

 

When breakfast was over, Shepard meandered her way to the AI core with her tinkering tools in hand. She had plenty of time to get a good look at EDI's body and she wanted to try her hand at keeping her promise. She was surprised to find Traynor sitting on the floor, her top half draped over the small alcove where EDI's body laid inert. The woman was asleep, snoring softly, her black hair hanging over her face. Shepard smiled softly before quietly approaching Traynor and kneeling beside her. "Hey, Samantha." She gently shook the woman's shoulder.

"Cheese and crackers!" Traynor blurted as she startled awake. "Oh, Commander." She nervously rubbed at her cheeks and chin, probably making sure she hadn't drooled. "Where... What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in the med bay?"

Shepard held up her tools, sitting back on her haunches. "Miranda says that my implants are back to full functionality, so I've been cleared to leave, pending another weeks' worth of prodding. Is there a reason you're sleeping in the AI core?"

Traynor rubbed her eyes and sighed. "I've been taking turns with Tali, trying to figure out how to get EDI's body functioning again. I guess I worked a little too late last night."

Shepard smiled warmly. "Why don't you go get something to eat. I'll take over for a bit."

"Thanks, Commander," Traynor moved to stand and groaned as Shepard heard her knees and back pop audibly in complaint to the awkward position she'd slept in. Shepard dropped from her haunches and crossed her legs underneath her. "Good luck."

Once Traynor had disappeared, Shepard carefully laid out her tools and said, "Okay, EDI. Let's see what we can do." She worked for hours, occasionally getting feedback from EDI, but to no avail. Everything she looked at told her that there was no reason that the body shouldn't be functional.

Shepard had a ration bar for lunch and about three hours later, Garrus popped in to check on her. "Any luck in here?" he asked, coming to kneel beside her and scan her work with his visor.

She sighed in frustration and dropped her hands in her lap, the wires in her fingers still inert, her omnitool glowing a soft orange. "I don't know what I thought. Like I'd swoop in and save the day in a few hours when Tali and Traynor have been working for months on the same issue."

Instead of feeding her inspirational crap, he hummed in thought, acknowledging her frustration and then took up one of her tools and indicated she hold up the wires in her left hand. As he worked carefully with the tool, he said, "I thought you might want to know that we got a transmission from Hackett. They're about a half an hour away."

She touched the wire he'd heated to the spliced ends in her other hand and they sparked. Sparks were new. She almost didn't want to leave after the small breakthrough. EDI's voice hummed over the speakers. "Shepard. I will still be here. You have important matters to attend."

"Thanks, EDI. I promise. You are my personal top priority. We will get you back." Shepard laid a palm on one of the glowing hard drive constructs that surrounded them. She received a small static shock for her efforts and jerked her hand away, sucking on her fingers.

Garrus set down her tool and stood from his crouch. "Okay?" he asked, holding his hand out to help her up.

"Yeah. Too long in here with nothing to ground me I guess," she chuckled accepting his hand up. "I need a shower before I face Admiral Hackett."

Garrus shuffled his feet, clearly uncomfortable. "Did you need me to come with you? Not for anything 'vigorous'... just in case you aren't as healed as you think."

She chuckled at her ability to still make him awkward without so much as a single word. "I haven't felt dizzy since last night. I think I'll be alright. I'll take it slow, just in case." She reached up and kissed him gently on the lips before leaving him to clean up.

* * *

 

Shepard shifted uncomfortably in her fatigues. She thought it might be slightly more respectful to greet the Admiral in something a bit more formal than her hoodie and cargo pants. The Normandy had taken off so they could meet the ships just outside the wreckage of the Citadel. As they had approached, Shepard had hovered behind Joker's chair to get a look at the destruction that the crucible had caused. It was awful. She imagined how many people had been killed by the explosion and the ensuing wreckage and shuddered. Her singular decision had sacrificed so many. She assumed any survivors had been found and recovered by the gaggle of shuttles and small ships that were hovering around the debris. A few of the station's lights still blazed and she paused to wonder if reconstruction had already begun. "Has anyone been down there since the rescue efforts?" she asked Liara who was hovering just to her right.

"According to everything I've heard, no one has. Most of the remaining ships that didn't escape the system are either civilian or mercenary. Neither of which has the authority or expertise to do any real work to repair the Citadel," she explained.

Shepard hummed in thought. There was activity on that station. Could the Keepers have survived? It was something to hope for. Their help might be invaluable if they hoped to fix the station. "The Primarch seemed to think that repairs were underway already," Garrus added as they watched the Admiral's ship slip into view.

Liara pursed her lips. "His intel may have been slightly on the side of hopeful rumors. The Citadel has become sort of ghoulish to many in it's current state. A lot of people are reluctant to take a chance."

"Well, I'm not one of those people," Shepard said, her fists clenching involuntarily. "I need to fix this."

Garrus' hand found her shoulder as Joker said, "The Admiral is requesting permission to come aboard."

"Granted," Shepard said as the ships adjusted so they were hovering beside each other and the docking tubes met. She gently slipped out from under Garrus' hand with a thankful smile and made her way to the CIC where she planned to greet Hackett. She flexed her fingers to calm the strange tingling feeling in the tips that had manifested since they'd arrived beside the Citadel.

Hackett boarded much like he had the previous time, flanked by two guards and with purpose. He made his way to her as she stood at attention and stopped in front of her with a wide smile on his weathered face. Instead of saluting, he held his hand out in front of him. "It's damned good to see you alive, Shepard."

She balked for a split second before taking his offered hand. "Same to you, sir."

He sighed as his grip loosened on her hand. "It's a shame that we can't say the same about Admiral Anderson."

She carefully pulled her hand away and stuffed it behind her, gripped in her other taking an at ease pose that felt strained. Her eyes burned for a split second as she remembered watching Anderson die beside her and being helpless to do anything about it. She had been the one to pull the trigger after all. "He was a brave man," she managed to choke out before swallowing her emotions and turning her gaze back on Hackett.

She thought she caught a glimpse of unshed tears glistening in the Admiral's eyes before he spoke. "Your communications officer briefed my people on the situation. I've brought most of the scientists back that fled the system after the Crucible fired. We're ready and eager to get started on fixing the relays so we can get people home."

"I have a team ready to take a shuttle over and get a read on what is happening over there," Shepard said. "I can be ready to go in ten minutes if your people are so eager."

Hackett frowned and then one of his brows raised in question. "From what I understand, you've only just recovered. Are you certain you're ready for field work, Commander?"

"With all due respect, sir, I am in a way responsible for this particular crisis. I'd like to be a part of the clean-up efforts," she insisted. Garrus was going to be thrilled. She hadn't told him she was going down with Tali and Reegar.

"If you feel up to task, then I won't stop you," Hackett said with a brief smile. "I'll return and inform the scientists to meet your shuttle in 20." He saluted and turned on his heel as she returned the gesture. After a few steps he paused and looked over his shoulder. "Oh, and Dr. Cole has requested a transfer to your team."

"Of course. She is welcome," Shepard said with a smile. "She can settle in here and take all of the time she needs before returning to work."

"I'll send her over." Hackett continued back out the airlock and Shepard sighed.

She turned and headed for the elevator. As her finger depressed the call button, she cringed as the accusation came at her across the CIC. "You've _got_ to be kidding, Shepard."

She turned to see Garrus making his way to her, his mandibles clamped to the sides of his face and his eyes blazing. It was easy to forget that Turians were born predators until he had that expression turned on you. She stood her ground, knowing he'd never hurt her, but if it had been any other Turian, she'd be reaching for her absent pistol. He stopped millimeters in front of her and she pressed her lips together, crossing her arms. "I'm going, Garrus. If you want to keep me safe, suit up." His eyes bored into her, but she refused to flinch. She'd been idle for too long. He had at least had the decency not to question her in front of Hackett, but they were currently garnering a few sideways glances from some of the crew. "This isn't up for debate," she said through gritted teeth.

When the elevator doors opened, he took her arm and led her inside. The doors closed behind them. With a sigh, he dropped her arm and visibly shook off his tension, his subvocals making a very new trilling sound that she had never heard and couldn't place on the emotional scale until she had context. He stood still for a few moments, breathing heavily as he got himself back under control. Then his finger pressed the button for their cabin and he leaned against the wall. She reached out and carefully touched his arm. "Dammit, Shepard. Why are you so stubborn?"

"Hey, you can't blame me. You knew this before we got together," she said with a terrible attempt at humor that made the trilling turn into a growl.

"Shepard, I..." he sighed heavily and turned his attention to her. "You just recovered from a near death experience. The last time I lost you, it broke me. We weren't any more than best friends then. I really don't know what I would do if I actually lost you a second time..." His hand lifted to tuck her hair behind her ear as the elevator door slid open.

She smiled and backed out of the elevator, pulling him behind her. "What happened to 'every bullet could have been the one, and they're just a little bit bigger this time'?" she asked, paraphrasing the speech he'd given her before they hit the Illusive Man's base. "We're not even going to do anything particularly life threatening."

"Things are different now," he admitted, the growl softening to a hum as he followed her into the cabin.

"How so?" she asked, turning to move toward her armor fabricator.

He grabbed her around the waist, stopping her in her tracks and pulling her close to him. She fell into the hug, his vibrating chest giving her a warm feeling as their foreheads met. He sighed deeply and his right arm released her. She opened her eyes and his were already looking back at her, a mischievous twinkle in them. "Because of this." He drew her attention to his hand and when she saw what he clutched in his talons, her knees nearly gave out from under her. Her heart raced as the small gem nestled in it's setting glittered in the light from the console on her desk. It was a sapphire on a silver band, nothing too gaudy or fancy and it was perfect. She realized she had come down with a mild case of laryngitis when he cleared his throat and said, "You can tell me if I'm doing something wrong here, Shepard. Research can only get me so far."

She tore her eyes away from the ring so she could meet his gaze. His mandibles were fluttering nervously. "No... nothing wrong. I just... you know what giving a human a ring means, right?"

He chuckled. "I'm asking you to join my clan, with a little bit of human flair."

She sighed, relieved that they were on the same page. "You know, the proposer generally drops to one knee," she teased.

"Well, I've told you before, Turians don't know how to duck," he said haughtily as she held out her hand and waved her ring finger at him. "Is that a yes?"

"Of course it is, Big Guy. To the end of the universe and back again. I already told you there's no Shepard without Vakarian. We might as well make this inter-species liaison official," she said.

With a huge grin, he carefully removed the delicate ring from it's box and slipped it onto her finger. "Unofficially official," he corrected. "I think me may want to fix the Galaxy and deal with Leviathan before we start picking out place settings."

She shrugged, admiring the ring on her finger. "As far as I'm concerned, you by my side is all I really need. Officially or not."

She leaned in and pressed her lips to his before hugging him tightly. His lips hovered beside her ear and he whispered so softly, she wasn't certain she heard. "I love you, Shepard."

She chuckled. "So this is one of those special occasions we talked about, huh?"

"It doesn't count if you're the only one who can hear. Now, we should probably suit up."

She had almost forgotten the mission. "Shit. I guess you're right..."

* * *

 

Shepard was the first one off the shuttle as Steve landed them as close to the Crucible as he could. The flash light on her shotgun only burned so far through the darkness. The air was foul and she glanced around slowly, looking for any signs of movement. Judging that the area was secure enough, she pulled up her omnitool and scanned the environment. "Life support is till intact," she mused, shutting down her omnitool and breaking the seal on her helmet to take the confining thing off. She hooked it to her belt just in case and Traynor stepped up beside her. It was strange to see the woman in armor, but she had insisted on joining them and Shepard had insisted she suit up in case there were environmental issues.

Her accent was thick as she spoke through the obvious nausea she was feeling over the stench of death that permeated the station. "Everything else is reading normal, Commander. I think it's safe to call in the science team."

Shepard's shuttle had landed first as the recon team. They were to evaluate the conditions and make sure it was safe for the others to land. Shepard switched on her comms and called to the other shuttle. "Everything checks out. Bring her down."

"Sure thing, Lola," James said. He'd volunteered to pilot the second shuttle when he realized that Ann Bryson was on the science team that had returned with Hackett. She didn't mind. It was one more soldier at her back if things went FUBAR.

As the second shuttle landed, Shepard glanced behind her at her team and shrugged. "While they're getting ready, let's press forward. We need to see if we can find that catalyst chamber."

Shepard switched on her visor as the others fell in behind her. It felt really good to be back on her feet and back in her armor. The fabricated pieces added to the comforting weight of her weapons and the new much subtler comfort of the ring nestled around her finger. She glanced back at Garrus and offered him a small smile before starting forward. The darkness of the Citadel felt like an inky blackness that closed up around them as they moved further away from the lights of the shuttles. Shepard's senses were on high alert which Garrus seemed to understand as he kept his subvocals reigned in tight. She knew he was worried, but he understood that she needed to be here. "What is that smell?" Traynor asked. "It's getting worse."

"Death," Garrus said simply, glancing around in all directions, the plates on the bridge of his nose pressed together as he made his closest approximation of a wrinkled nose.

Shepard continued forward. "Last time I was here, I dropped into one of the Keeper tunnels from the beam. It was lined with countless remains. Anderson and I thought they might have been trying to build a Reaper in here, like they were at the Collector Base," she explained.

"Liara gave me some schematics that she managed to pull off your ruined suit before they disposed of it," Tali said, the glow from her omnitool lighting the area as she recalled the readings.

"That thing still had information on it?" Shepard asked, stopping to move beside Tali and read over her shoulder.

"Not much, but it may give us an approximation of your location when you landed."

Shepard grunted and sighed. "Leave it to the GPS to keep working even after the medigel dispenser gave out. I may have been bleeding out, but at least I knew where I was doing it."

Tali fiddled a moment longer with her omnitool and then pointed. "This way... I think."

"Lead the way," Shepard offered. She fell in at Tali's back on the left, and Reegar matched her on the right.

The orange of Tali's omnitool cast an eerie glow on everything it landed on. Shepard was reminded of a Halloween Haunted House attraction. Even her skin crawled as she waited for something to jump out at them. She paused momentarily as she thought she heard a noise. "What was that?" Garrus confirmed, his armor clanking softly as he raised his rifle.

"Tali, turn your light off," Shepard requested, glancing around. The orange glow winked out and Shepard blinked several times to adjust her night vision back to normal. "There," she hissed, pointing as she caught a glimpse of an active console in the distance ahead.

She took the lead again, her shotgun poised in case she needed it. As they approached the glowing console, she let go of her breath that she hadn't realized she'd been holding. One of the bug like Keepers was working diligently on the console and ignoring everything around it as they usually did. Shepard sneered as she remembered the last time she'd seen a Keeper, it had been sifting through human body parts. On the Citadel, approaching a Keeper meant the thing would self destruct to be replaced by another that came from goodness knew where. If this one had survived the Crucible, that meant that they were at least partially organic creatures and _not_ Reaper technology. Was that because they'd been reprogrammed by the Protheans from Ilos centuries ago? Shepard sighed. There had to be more where this one came from, and she needed access to that console. She stepped cautiously toward the bulbous creature and reached out with the butt of her shotgun to nudge it out of her way. She braced for its reaction, but nothing came. It simply stepped aside and cocked it's head to blink at her vapidly. "Well, that's new," Garrus mused as he approached. "Back when I was in C-Sec, the cadets used to haze each other by seeing how close..." his speech was interrupted when the Keeper turned it's gaze to him. An ear numbing whine emanated from it's throat before the thing exploded in a spray of sticky green goop before the rest of it melted into a puddle.

"Ugh," Traynor complained, jumping out of the way of the puddle as it spread around their feet.

"Why didn't it self destruct when Shepard touched it?" Reegar asked cautiously as everyone else thought the same thing.

Shepard reached up and rubbed the spray of Keeper from her face and flicked her arm downwards to add it to the rest of the puddle. "Just call me the Keeper whisperer," she grumbled. Deep in her gut, she was panicking. What was it about her that the Keeper had seemed to want to obey? All of the scans they'd secretly gotten for a Salarian scientist four years ago had never suggested that they answered to anyone besides the Citadel itself. She shuddered and stepped gingerly through the puddle so she could access the console. Within moments she had activated the commands that lit this area of the station. Bright white lights momentarily blinded her. "So apparently, what's still intact can still function," she said, fighting the urge to rub her eyes.

"That's good news, right?" Traynor asked hopefully.

"It means the tech isn't fried," she said. "We'll have to get deeper inside if we want to find out whether the catalyst is still functioning. That's what we will need to get the Crucible to fire the repair function that Tali came up with. Otherwise, none of this will matter."

"Right," Traynor stuttered. "Onward then...?"

Shepard nodded and Tali brought her map back up to lead them further on. As they walked, the stench of death continued to get more overpowering and Shepard's stomach threatened to turn at every breath. She wished Traynor would stop gulping so loudly because the sound was making her own gag reflex shudder. If the woman actually threw up, Shepard guaranteed that she would lose her lunch too. Tali and Reegar moved forward, unphased because apparently they could turn off the olfactory sensors in their suits. Lucky bastards.

"You doing okay, Big Guy?" Shepard asked Garrus, knowing if the smell was bothering her it was probably hitting his heightened senses ten fold.

He rumbled in his chest and said, "On the bright side, we won't have to worry about sparing my rations for at least a week."

She laughed carefully, trying her best not to inhale through her mouth. The smell was bad enough, she didn't need to taste it, too. "We've got another Keeper, Shepard," Tali announced, drawing her attention.

She looked away from Garrus and her eyes landed on the creature. It was picking through some debris and sifting out the usable parts. She had been right. They were repairing the Citadel. There was still hope. The Keepers understood the technology better than they could ever hope to. Her group all stopped a good distance away from the thing and she paused and sighed before moving to carefully approach it. "Hey there, little fella," she said gently, as she got close enough to touch it. She felt ridiculous trying to get the attention of the Keeper like she might a stray dog. She laid her hand nervously on it's hide and its head cocked to regard her just as the other's had. "It's okay," she cooed. "No need to puddle up. I would like to ask you a question." When it didn't respond by doing much else than blinking at her, she continued. "We need to get to the Catalyst chamber. Can you take us there?"

She jerked back when it dropped the heavy piece of metal it had in it's tiny insect arms and the sound reverberated around her. It seemed not to notice her reaction as it turned away and started to walk in the direction they had been heading. She turned to glance at the others and their varying degrees of befuddlement. She was certain her own face showed puzzlement. "I guess we're supposed to follow it," Garrus suggested, his tone wary.

"I guess so," she agreed with a shudder. "The rest of you keep your distance. I don't want to have to get too close to another one if this one decides to throw a suicide hissy."

"You'd think the Rachni would have cured you of your bug phobia," Garrus hummed as he approached her.

"It's not a phobia," she corrected. "It's more of a strong distaste..."

"Whatever you call it, I've never heard you shriek like you did when Liara pulled that one into you on Noveria," he said with a chuckle.

"Wait... Shepard shrieked?" Traynor asked with more than mild amusement.

Garrus nodded as they began to follow behind the Keeper at a reasonable distance. "I really wish I'd had the opportunity to get a recording of it." Shepard pressed her lips together and punched his shoulder playfully as Traynor laughed heartily.

As they followed the Keeper, the walls began to close around them and they descended into darkness. Shepard's heart raced as she realized it was leading them to where the piles of bodies had been when the beam had spat her out. That explained why the heavy scent of death was now all around them. Her visor was kicking back readings that she was glad she couldn't see with the naked eye. Hundreds of corpses in various states of decay were piled up along the narrow walls. "Keep right behind me. Single file. Watch your step," she instructed to those without the help of visors.

"You picking this up, Shepard?" Garrus asked, his subharmonics conveying horror.

"I really wish I wasn't," she agreed.

The Keeper stopped a few yards ahead and she held up her hand to keep the others back while it adjusted the wall so it opened up into the chamber ahead. She recognized the chasm she had crossed before as she tried to catch up to Anderson. The humming and hissing of hydraulics distracted her from delving into her memories. That was a time in her life that she really wished she could bury. As the Citadel's systems functioned around them, she carefully followed the Keeper across the narrow bridge and up to the rounded platform where she had showed off against the Illusive Man. She was surprised to see that both his and Anderson's bodies had been removed.

The Keeper disappeared into one of it's holes, it's task completed and she moved forward. The others followed. She glanced around the platform and her memories flashed angrily before her " _You did good, child. You did good._ " Anderson's voice repeated in her head and she felt a tear slip unbidden from her eye. The spot where they'd sat, both bleeding out, called to her. She moved to the small upraised circle in the middle of the platform and sat, pressing her palm to the cold floor where Anderson had breathed his last. Another tear fell as Garrus moved to join her. Tali, Traynor and Reegar all found the console she'd used to open the station's arms very interesting.

"We could hear everything from the Normandy," Garrus said softly as she cried silently. "I thought I was listening to you die... After the first time, you know it was Anderson who came to personally tell me you'd been killed. I never forgot that. He had a million other things on his plate and he took the time to... He said you were like a daughter to him..."

Garrus' words tightened her throat but also made her feel slightly better. She picked her hand up from the floor and leaned into his chest. His free arm snaked around her to pull her closer as they looked out over the view of Earth. As she studied the setting, she suddenly frowned, realizing that she had no memory of how she had gotten to the Catalyst chamber from where they were. She patted his arm so he would let her up and then she stood, moving toward the console. She remembered being unable to stand up, her legs so weak that she had to crawl. She'd reached for the console as Hackett called her name over and over in her ear. As those memories flooded her, she reached for the console again and then pulled her hand back because she knew she hadn't touched it at all. She'd passed out in front of it. She gently moved the others out of the way so she could study the area. How had she, unconsciously, gotten from here to wherever the Catalyst chamber was?

Her foot traced the edges of an oddly shaped tile in the floor in front of the console. She closed her eyes so her flashing memories would be clearer. She worked her position out in her mind, even going so far as to get down on the floor and pinpoint exactly where she'd fallen. Realizing she'd been on that tile at the time, she got back to her feet. "This is it," she said with a sigh. "I passed out right here and woke up in the Catalyst chamber."

"That was when we lost contact with you," Tali said. "The fleet was fighting and trying to buy you time until this red glow started to ooze from the Presidium. Hackett had the fleets fall back so they could reach the rendezvous. Joker didn't want to leave without you, but Liara convinced him that if we wanted to save you, we needed to save ourselves first. No one knew what the Crucible would do when it fired..." Tali said. Her hands were wringing nervously like she felt bad about being in on the plan to leave Shepard behind.

Shepard stepped forward and took the Quarian's hands in hers. "You didn't do anything wrong, Tali. I knew the likely outcome. It's why I left that flash message on the Normandy."

Tali stepped closer to Shepard and then hugged her fiercely. "That doesn't mean I have to like it, you bosh'tet."

Shepard chuckled. "Well, everything worked out up until now, so let's see if we can figure out how to find the Catalyst chamber so we can fix the Galaxy and maybe find out what happened to EDI and the Geth."

"So, you said you were right there when you lost consciousness?" Reegar asked, an idea clearly crossing his mind.

"On this tile," she confirmed, tapping it with her foot. Then she knelt to scan it with her omnitool. There was no mechanism that she recognized in or under the tile, but it was strangely disjointed from the rest of the floor. "It looks like it lifts up." She flipped through her omnitool settings and swapped her omniblade for a crowbar like tool. The orange tool built itself and she tried to slip it under the tile, but she couldn't get the tool beneath the surface.

"So what's different now?" Reegar asked.

She sighed, storing the omnitool and resting her elbows on her knees as she squatted on the tile. "Aside from me not being half dead and alone, nothing." She stared at the tile as it mocked her and then she had an idea. "I wonder..."

Garrus moved up to stand beside her as she switched her omni blade back on and adjusted the length. "What are you up to Shepard?" he asked, his subharmonics rumbling.

Before any of them could protest, she pulled the glove from her right hand and sliced her palm. She hissed as the cut began to bleed, but instead of covering it up, she turned her palm over and allowed the blood to drip onto the surface of the tile where she and Garrus stood. "Crap, that stings," she muttered as it began to create a small puddle beside her foot.

"No kidding, Shepard. What did you do that for?" Garrus asked, taking her hand in his and carefully applying medigel to the cut.

"For that," she said, indicating how the tile below them had begun to glow bright. It lifted up, making them both stumble a bit as it jerked. "We're not all going to fit," she cursed. "You three stay here. Garrus and I will check things out." She clutched his upper arm with her good hand as the tile rose higher and higher. "I'm kind of glad that I was passed out for this last time," she whispered. He pried her hand from his arm and laced his fingers with hers instead. They rose higher and higher and finally passed through an invisible barrier that set her skin tingling. "Do you feel that?" she asked, shuddering.

He shook his head. "It's starting to be more than a little weird that the Citadel is reacting to you like it is." They rose up over a platform and then their tile began to descend down to nestle itself in a groove in the floor. "Spirits, what is this place?" he asked as he glanced around in awe.

She turned to face the long path that she had walked down as she and the little boy discussed the fate of the Universe and her role in it. She noticed that apparently the Keepers didn't frequent this particular section of the Citadel as her trail of bloody footprints still blazed their way ahead. Everywhere else, her blood and that of Anderson and the Illusive Man had been meticulously wiped clean. As she stared down the path, the right side was completely destroyed, the node having exploded outward with enough force to knock her back as she remembered. Her hand fell instinctively on her pistol as she looked around, trying to catch any glimpse of the boy that had called himself the Catalyst.

She jerked back to herself as Garrus shook her. "Shepard?"

"Yeah, sorry. It's gone." she said absently, taking a few steps away from the tile and toward the dark end of the path where the large beam of energy that made up the Catalyst had once burned. She realized why the relays weren't functioning. She also had an idea why the Geth and EDI had ceased to function.

"What's gone?" he asked, following close behind as she continued to walk in her own bloody footprints as if she were being drawn to the heart of synthetic life. When her trail ended and the footprints veered right, she paused to glance at the blackened remains of the node. His hand fell gently on her shoulder and he spoke again. "You never really explained what happened here."

She turned haunted eyes to him and truly looked at him for the first time since the tile had landed in the chamber. "Remember the boy I told you about? The one that I watched get killed as I was leaving Earth... When I woke up here, he was here, but it wasn't really him. It was an image of him. I guess the Catalyst took him from my memories and used his form. Anyway, he said he was the Catalyst and the Citadel was part of him. He explained the cycles and the Reapers and then he gave me three choices." She paused and sighed, reliving the experience. "First choice, destroy the Reapers, just like we'd planned. He warned me that the Crucible would not discriminate. All synthetic life would be affected. Second choice... Turns out the Illusive Man was right all along. I could have used the Crucible to Control the Reapers, bent them to my will. That option broke down every molecule in my body and dissolved my corporeal form so my mind could take control of the Reapers. Third choice... much like the second, it meant I would add my essence to the Crucible to kick-start the final stage of evolution for all life. He called it Synthesis. Organics and Synthetics would have been one."

Garrus' subharmonics penetrated the utter silence in the chamber. "No offense Shepard, for once, I'm glad you decided to take the selfish route."

"I'm just glad I actually survived to help fix the mess I made. Sure the Reapers are dead, but the rest of the galaxy is in serious need of a jump start," she said quietly.

"We'll figure it out..." he said taking her hand back in his and squeezing it lightly. "You said something was gone when we first got here?"

She cleared her throat against the threatening tide of emotion as she stood back in the place where she'd made the most difficult decision of her life. "Um, yeah... The Catalyst. The boy. He's missing, and the beam connecting the Citadel and the Crucible is also dark." She glanced around while he hummed thoughtfully. "According to both the Catalyst and Leviathan, the Catalyst was originally called 'the Intelligence'. It was a sort of synthetic life form created by Leviathan's species ages ago to help solve the problem of organics being wiped out by their own synthetic creations."

"Sure, let's create a synthetic life to explain why synthetics always rebel, so it can rebel against us. That's sound logic..." he mumbled as she dropped his hand and approached the edge where the beam had once been.

"The intelligence realized that the cycle would never end, so they created the Reapers using Leviathan's image to start their own cycles. Each cycle ended in the birth of a Reaper. They were harvesting highly evolved life forms to preserve as Reapers," she explained.

"So the question is, what happened to the Intelligence when the Crucible fired?" he said, looking down into the abyss beside her.

"Exactly." She reached out her hand into the darkness and jerked it back when she received a shock. "Ow!"

"You okay?" he asked as she shook the tingling from her hand.

"Yeah... There must be a charge in the atmosphere," she said, her mind grasping for a thought that she wasn't quite able to reach. Something was going on with her. The Keepers were doing her bidding, her blood made the tile rise, she'd gotten a spark from EDI's body when people more brilliant than her had been working on it for months. She closed her eyes and reached out again, visualizing the beam that had previously lit the chamber. Was it simply because she'd been there the last time? Had her body absorbed some of the current from the beam when the destruction node had exploded? Whatever it was, the energy was itching beneath her skin to go home.

She found herself jerked back to herself as Garrus tugged her into his arms. "Spirits, what are you doing?!"

"What are you talking about?" she asked, feeling slightly out of sorts.

"You nearly stepped off the edge, Shepard!"

"I have to put it back," she heard herself say.

Garrus gripped her by her arms and shook her. "Snap out of it, Shepard!" he shouted at her.

Finally, it came to her. She gripped his armor over his chest and looked up at him with a grin. "I understand now! That's how I survived all of those injuries, even while Levithan had me trapped!"

It was his turn to ask the question. "What are you talking about?"

She patted his chest and moved away from the edge. "I need to meditate," she said.

She dropped to the ground and closed her eyes, resting her hands limply on her folded knees. She'd done this so many times that it was second nature to close out all of her surroundings and concentrate on her inner self. Nearly as soon as she concentrated, she found the minute difference in her body. A tiny ball of energy, hidden away that was not natural for her. Her implants were repaired, her body was healed and it was time to let it go. The tiny spark of life that gave way to synthetics. She reached for the energy and gripped it tight in her minds eye. Then like she released her biotics, she gently tossed the energy back toward where it had come from. It happily bounced out of her chest, taking a small piece of her intentions with it, a small piece of humanity. She slowly opened her eyes and watched it go as Garrus looked on in amazement. She sighed in relief as it dropped over the edge and the beam roared to life. Where it had been pure white synthetic energy before, it now had a touch of yellow. A bit of personality from her. She knew that meant there would be no more cycles. The Intelligence was now partially organic and it would understand. "What did you just do?" Garrus asked, stepping up beside her and offering her a hand up.

She took it and stood, falling into him and hugging him tightly. "I let it go. When the Crucible fired, the Intelligence took refuge inside me. It saved both of us. It kept me alive and I shielded it from the blast." He hummed, his subvocals uncertain, but it seemed he was unwilling to let her go. "We should go tell the others."

He kept tight hold of her hand as they walked back down the path to the tile. Almost as soon as they both stepped on it, it rose from the floor and hovered back up and around the platform to slip through the invisible barrier and back down to where Tali, Traynor and Reegar waited. Shepard jumped from the tile before it hit the ground and rushed to Tali's side. The Quarian was sitting on the floor and looking like her breathing was labored. Garrus jogged behind Shepard. "Are you alright?" he asked, hovering by Tali.

Shepard dropped to her knees and began frantically running scanning programs on her omnitool as Reegar said in an extremely concerned tone, "A few minutes ago, she just dropped to the floor."

Shepard glanced past Tali as the young boy appeared in her vision. "They can't see me," he said softly. "You need to help the life in her suit. Due to proximity to the Citadel it was prematurely brought back online when you gave me back. None of the proper reboot programs were ran. The suit will suffocate her if you do not hurry. Minimize the chances by shutting the Geth back down."

Shepard growled in frustration. "I don't know how," she said.

"She does," the boy said, indicating Tali.

Shepard stopped for a split second and then prayed she was making the right decision. "Tali, do you have a Geth kill-switch in that omnitool of yours?"

"They're all voice activated," Reegar answered for her. "Only she can shut off the Geth in her suit."

Shepard growled again. "Alright, everyone out! Reegar, you leave every antibiotic and antihistamine you've got on your person." Tali slumped and Shepard slipped underneath her to keep her sitting up. Reegar realized the urgency and did as he was asked, dragging the others with him. "Tali, I need you to shut off the Geth. To do that, you need to be able to breathe. Do you trust me?" Tali nodded and weakly gripped Shepard's arm. Shepard reached up and carefully removed Tali's mask. The hiss of the bioseal breaking was closely followed by Tali inhaling a huge breath of air. After several more gasps, she managed to quickly call up a program on her omnitool and a slur of Quarian commands echoed in the wide open room. "Did it work?" Shepard asked, making every effort not to touch Tali's bare skin as the girl collapsed into her lap.

They sat piled on the floor while Tali caught her breath. "I shut it down for now. Keelah, what if the others... Shepard, there were thousands of Quarians that volunteered to take Geth into their suits..."

"It's okay," Shepard soothed as the boy assured her that it was only because Tali was so close that her Geth had come online prematurely. "They're too far away. Yours backfired because you were so close to the Catalyst when it reactivated. The others will be able to run their reboot programs. I'm sorry. I didn't know that would happen."

"So you managed to get the Catalyst back online?" Tali asked curiously, sitting up and turning that stunning bare face on Shepard. Shepard handed her mask back to her, careful not to touch the inside.

"In a manner of speaking," she answered as Tali secured the mask back in place and began sifting through the antibiotics that Reegar had left behind. "Are you going to be alright?"

"I'm lucky three times," Tali said with a shrug. "One, the Keepers are excellent sanitizers, two, I had months of Geth induced immunizations under my belt, and three, I've been exposed to you before on Rannoch. It's good you sent the others away. Your germs are familiar." She carefully unwrapped one of the packets and introduced the gel like substance into her suit environment through a port on her side hidden beneath a flap of purple cloth. "How did you know about the reboot programs?"

Shepard sighed as Tali cocked her head curiously. "Because I was the one here before, the Catalyst saved me and itself and now I can communicate with it. It told me."

"There is never a dull moment on the Normandy," Tali mused.

Shepard ran a few scans on Tali before helping her to her feet. "No fever, yet. It looks like you lucked out."

"I'll have to be extra careful for the next 24 hours, but you're probably right," Tali agreed.

"I'm feeling a bit tired," Shepard admitted. "Let's get back to the shuttle and let the scientists do some work."

"I think that hallway full of corpses will need a clean up crew as well," Tali agreed, gathering up the packets strewn on the floor and tucking them safely in one of her many pockets.

* * *

 

When they made it back to the shuttles, Ann greeted them excitedly. "We've been running scans since you left. Readings show that the Keepers are still active and they're slowly rebuilding the structural damage to the Citadel. They haven't touched the Crucible, but we have plenty of engineers to help us tweak anything that needs tweaking on that end... I'm sorry. I'm getting carried away again..."

James came up behind her, his assault rifle nestled in the crook of his arm. "Everything's been quiet here, Commander. From the looks of things, I missed out on the fun."

"Fun isn't the word I would use to describe it," Garrus huffed. He'd been strangely quiet on the walk back.

"I'll debrief everyone in the morning. Tali, could you send Ann a copy of your plans for the relay jump-start. Once all of the structural damage to the Citadel and the Crucible is repaired, we can put that into effect if everyone agrees that it should work," Shepard said shortly. She needed to get back to the Normandy and into the AI core to see if she could get EDI's body back online.

Once she had spouted her orders, she climbed into the shuttle and found a seat. With a sigh, she dropped, leaning forward to rest her head in her palms. She heard the others join her and Steve took off to head back to the Normandy. "So if Tali's Geth came back online, do you think we might get EDI's body working again?" Traynor asked, breaking the silence that had fallen over the shuttle.

"As soon as we get back, I'm heading there personally with my reboot codes primed," Shepard said, lifting her head to meet Traynor's gaze. "I'm hopeful."

"Then you're getting that cut looked at, having a hearty dinner and taking the evening off," Garrus grumbled pointedly. He was sitting beside her with his arms crossed and his mandibles pulled tightly to his face.

"Sure, yeah," she complied. She didn't have the energy to argue. To be honest, his plan sounded extremely tempting.

His gaze snapped to her, his eyes narrowing and his subvocals erupting with suspicion. Traynor cleared her throat. "It's a shame you didn't get to check if your apartment was destroyed. I could go for a bath."

Shepard snorted. "You and me both, Samantha."

The Kodiak slipped into the Normandy's shuttle bay and landed gently. Shepard popped the hatch and was stripping weapons and armor as she walked. She dropped her guns on the mod table as she passed and then with one arm full of gloves and shoulder pads, she began running the reboot codes that she had worked up earlier in the day as she worked on EDI's body. Tali and Reegar exited on the engineering deck and Garrus helpfully pushed the crew deck button to deposit them at the AI core. Shepard almost jogged to the core as soon as the elevator opened, Traynor on her heels. She held up a palm to Chakwas as they rushed by, indicating she'd submit to ministrations after she fixed EDI.

The door closed behind her and Traynor, but Garrus did not follow. Most likely he was explaining the situation to Chakwas. Shepard dropped to her knees and calmly gathered the pieces that she had been working on before Hackett arrived. She meticulously placed them where they belonged and checked and double checked her work before closing up EDI's access panel. The panel disappeared seamlessly into the rest of her metallic flesh and Shepard sighed before saying, "Alright EDI, let's give this a shot."

"I am prepared, Shepard." The AI said, a hint of nerves in her voice.

Shepard laid her omnitool on EDI's chest and Traynor lifted the small connector wire and inserted it in a node in the back of EDI's neck. With a nod from Traynor, Shepard reached over and tapped the execute command on her wrist. She watched the program load, the percentage bar slowly filling. When it finally reached 100%, a small arc of electricity jumped from her omnitool into EDI's chest. Shepard held her breath as the synthetic body warmed under her palm and jerked. Traynor let out a small squeak of anticipation. Like a defibrillator, the program charged a second time and the electricity jumped again. EDI's body jerked again and Shepard's palm was wrenched from her chest as she sat up, not with a harsh intake of breath as a human would, but with a deafening sound of feedback. Shepard clapped her hands over her ears and backed away from the robot. Within seconds, the sound was snuffed and Shepard opened her eyes, not realizing she had closed them. Her eyes fell upon EDI's body. She was sitting up, her hair limp, like Shepard had never seen it before, her eyes looked comically in different directions and her head was turning at odd angles to make up for the setback.

After a few gut-wrenching moments, Shepard sighed as EDI blinked her full, synthetic lashes slowly and her eyes righted themselves. Her hair began to reform from the individual strands to her normal single piece that she seemed to prefer. Shepard stepped toward her and reached out her hand. "EDI?"

"I am... okay," The AI said slowly, glancing up at Shepard, "Though I do not recommend touching this body. It is mildly over charged."

Shepard pulled her hand back, closing her fist around the cut in her palm. "So, is everything in working order?"

EDI got down from the alcove and stood, then rolled her shoulders as if testing her mobility. "It should only take me a moment to re-acclimatize to this body, but yes, everything appears to be functioning properly." She returned her gaze to Shepard and her silver lips spread in a smile. "Thank you, Shepard. I am grateful you were able to restore my consciousness to my body."

"I am too, EDI," Shepard said, returning the smile. "Maybe you should go find Joker. But, no kissing until you work out that charge issue."

EDI cocked her head. "A good idea, Shepard."

Her heels clicked lightly as she passed and disappeared into the medbay. Traynor exchanged an excited look with Shepard before following after her. Shepard knelt and gathered her abandoned things, carefully rolling up her tools and slipping them into the compartment on her belt where they belonged, and then tucking her armor pieces under her arm before shuffling her tired body into the medbay so Chakwas could look at her palm. The older woman stood by the doorway, her arms crossed and a sour look on her face. "Oh, now that you've got a moment, have I got your permission to do my job?"

Shepard sighed and sat down on the nearest bed. "I'm sorry, doc. I just wanted to help EDI. My hand already feels better, it was just a scratch."

Chakwas scoffed, slipping gloves on. "The way Garrus paints it, you handed a piece of your soul to the Citadel today. I'd say that warrants a few extra scans."

Shepard chuckled. "He's being dramatic. I'm fine."

"He's concerned," Chakwas said as she took a rag and cleaned off the medigel that was coating the cut. "My professional opinion is, you should talk to him."

"That's your professional opinion?" Shepard asked with a grin.

Chakwas pursed her lips as she sanitized the cut, applied a fresh coat of medigel and then wrapped a light bandage around Shepard's hand. When she was done, she patted Shepard's knuckles before she gave her a wry smile. Dropping Shepard's hand, she began a scan on her omnitool as she spoke. "He was the only one on this bloody ship that wouldn't accept what everyone else saw as fact. You were gone Shepard." A tear slipped from Chakwas' eye before she could stop it but she cleared her throat and continued. "He told me that he wouldn't give up because he could still feel you. Now, I don't have to tell you what Turians believe about Spirits, but if Garrus is sensing something wrong, perhaps it might be a good idea to listen to his instincts."

Shepard pulled Chakwas into a hug. If Anderson had filled the role of father in her life, Chakwas had definitely taken the mother. "Thank you, Karin," she said before Chakwas pulled away and straightened her shirt, and brushed a few more tears away. Then she flapped her hands indicating Shepard was free to go and busied herself at her console while Shepard slipped out.

Seeing the mess hall still empty, Shepard made her way to the elevator to drop her armor off in her room and take a shower before she grabbed dinner. She was tired, but she and Garrus definitely needed to have some words. Chakwas was right. Garrus' instincts were never wrong. She was surprised to find her room unlocked, but when she stepped in, she realized why. Garrus was busying himself by feeding her fish.

"Hey, Big Guy," she said softly, shifting from one foot to the other. "Wanna talk about it?"

Garrus dropped his hand to his side as the fish food filtered into the tank and floated lazily toward the waiting fish below. "I heard you fixed EDI's body," he said without looking at her.

"Yeah," Shepard said, stepping past him to hop down into the living area and drop her armor in a pile on the floor at the foot of the bed before going to fish through her dresser for some casual clothes. "She uh... She should be fine..." She refused to lead him. They had never had problems communicating or sharing their thoughts.

His subvocals were carefully reigned in and it was a stab in the heart to realize he was hiding from her. "And your hand?" he asked.

She lifted her bandaged right hand and waved at him with a silly smile. He cocked his head, his mandibles still stuck tight to his cheeks. When she realized he wasn't going to say anything unless she acknowledged it first, she sighed. "Chakwas did a full scan. She didn't faint in terror, so good news, my soul is still intact."

Both his tongue and mandibles clicked in annoyance and she cringed. "Can you blame me for being concerned, Shepard? I stood in front of you today and watched you... do whatever you did..." He paused as if gathering his thoughts and began pacing. "You sat there on the floor and that light left your chest... What am I supposed to do with that?"

She stepped away from the dresser and took hold of his forearm to stop the pacing. "Hey... I know, it was... strange, but hell, Garrus in these last few years, I have seen some really weird shit. The fact that the Catalyst survived at all was a damned miracle. It saved me. While it was inside me, it kept my body functioning even as Leviathan tried to eliminate me. Without it, you'd be looking at my name pasted on that memorial wall, not the flesh and blood woman in front of you." As she said that, he dropped the careful hold he had on his subvocals and she heard the heartbreaking keen that choked out. "Last night, with you beside me, in my own bed, I was protected from all sides. It's why my body was able to heal so quickly. With it's job done, it was time to let it go. I was selfish when I chose to destroy the Reapers. I can't be selfish anymore. If I can help, I'm going to. Returning the catalyst was the right thing to do."

"You're saying this like you didn't just give up your only line of defense against Leviathan," he pointed out pulling her across the small space to sit on the couch beside him.

"You mean besides my indomitable will?" she teased, trying to break the awful keening still buzzing in his chest.

"That worked really well the last time," he retorted, his tone far from joking.

"Give me a little credit, I was dying. You can't expect me to be 100% all of the time... That's why I have you. You pulled me from the ledge today, right Big Guy?" she pushed, doing her best to try and keep positive and support him like he was always able to do for her.

"Quite, literally," he agreed, the keening slowing. She stood and climbed onto his lap, straddling his legs. His hands found her thighs and slid up to her hips. "Didn't Miranda recommend you don't over exert yourself?" he asked.

"What Miranda doesn't know won't hurt her," she said leaning in to lay light kisses on his neck.

His hands gripped her hips tighter for a split second as she pushed his buttons, but then he lifted them up to grip her upper arms and pull her off his neck. "But it might hurt you..." his expression was pained. "I think you've had enough excitement for one day."

"Are you sure?" she asked, grinding her hips into him.

He growled and gripped her arms tighter. "Please don't. It really won't take much for me to say yes, and that's a bad idea, Shepard."

Her shoulders slumped. "Spoil sport," she sighed making to get up.

He pulled her closer, pressing his lips to hers and kissed her fiercely. The kiss was short and left her breathless when he pulled away to touch his forehead to hers. "Trust me, when we're sure it's safe, I will gladly let you pop my heat sink."

"Deal," she said with a lustful giggle as she came down off the kiss.

With one last pained grumble, he let her up and said, "I'm going to go downstairs and take a shower. I know you're probably itching to wash the Keeper off of you as well. I'll see you in the mess hall?"

"20 minutes," she agreed, running fingers over his fringe as she passed to head to her shower.

* * *

 

By the time she was clean and presentable, the night owl people on her crew were crowded in the mess hall. She made her way to the kitchen and poured herself some coffee and nearly downed the whole mug as she stood there. After pouring a second mug, she grabbed a ration bar and went to sit in one of the free chairs with an open one beside it. "How's the leg? Where's Brynn?" she asked Jacob who was sitting at the end of the table, his cast propped on a chair that he'd pulled around the side of the table.

"It's good, Shepard. She's settling in with Jake." he replied with a grin.

"Jake?" she asked, her eyebrow raised as she attempted to tear open her ration bar with her one good hand. She felt Garrus move up and sit behind her. She didn't need to look to know it was him.

Jacob chuckled. "We didn't want a junior, but Jake was close enough."

She smiled and then turned her attention to Garrus. He was pointedly watching her fiddle with the stubborn wrapper. She gave up and cursed her hand before handing the bar to him so he could easily rip into it with his talons. "Thank you," she grumbled as he handed the open bar back to her and ruffled her hair.

"Is that the Turian/human equivalent of 'honey, can you open the pickle jar'?" Zaeed asked as he lounged back in his chair, his hands folded over his stomach.

"I resent that," she protested. "I have never met a pickle jar I couldn't open."

Kaidan let out a sarcastic chuckle. "So that time I grilled those burgers on the SR1 for Independence Day. That wasn't you who asked me to open your pickle jar?"

"You must have me confused with Liara," she said, her cheeks reddening as she recalled the incident.

"Uh, Shepard, she's blue. I think I know the difference," he said grinning as he took a bite of the chicken on his plate.

She held up her ration bar and pointed it at him. "Hey, I loosened it for you."

He shook his head, grinning and Jack sat up straighter in her seat. "Hold the fucking phone. Is it me or did anyone else notice the rock on Shepard's finger?" At Jack's exclamation, all eyes fell on her. The mess hall went quiet and she heard Garrus tittering in his chest, quite pleased with himself. "Did you propose to her? And nobody fucking knew!?"

"You didn't tell _me_?!" Tali's voice came from behind them. She must have walked in on the conversation from the elevator.

Shepard held up her hands in placation at the uproar of excitement that burst out. "Alright, guys. Everyone simmer down." Garrus was leaning back in his seat, his arms crossed, laughing inside and out and she shot him a glare. He responded with a wide grin as everyone quieted. She glanced around at everyone. "Yes, the ring means what you all think it means...." She was forced to pause again as everyone began talking at once. When they'd calmed, she continued. "We didn't mean to not say anything, but with Hackett's arrival and the hubbub on the Citadel, it sort of..."

"Became the least important thing to happen today," he finished for her, leaning forward to squeeze her thigh and let her know it was alright for her to be thinking that.

"Bullshit, it is!" Jack shouted. "Where's the booze? We're celebrating!"

"Did someone say celebrate? What did I miss?" Joker and EDI walked around the elevator wall and stopped beside Tali who was still standing with her arms crossed and her head cocked.

"These fuckers got engaged today!" Jack said, her voice gaining decibels with each exclamation and her hands spread wide to indicate Shepard and Garrus.

"You're shitting me!" Joker said, his face lighting up. "Oh, we are definitely celebrating."

Jack hopped up from her seat and rushed off, probably to find booze and rouse the rest of the crew. Shepard had a feeling that her night had just gotten much longer than she had anticipated.

 

The crew deck was almost filled to capacity. Shepard had enjoyed herself for the most part as she and Garrus were buried under a sea of congratulations. Now, she sat in starboard observation, thankful that Kaiden hadn't decided to retire yet for the night. She was staring out the window at the stars, glad that she was finally able to do so without having a mild panic attack. There were worse things in the galaxy than open space. Her mind was wandering as she nursed what was probably only her third drink of the night.

"Hey, Lola," James sat down beside her, and she startled, sloshing her drink over her hand. She had not even heard him come in.

"Hey, James. What're you doing in here?" She flicked the dampness from her fingers then wiped her hand on her pant leg.

He chuckled. "I'm not the guest of honor. The real question is, what're _you_ doing in here?"

She sighed. "Is 'contemplating the universe' an acceptable answer?"

He shrugged his wide shoulders and sipped on the beer in his hand. "Sounds like too much thinking to me, but what do I know, huh?" He looked out at the stars with her as they lazily drifted. After a few minutes he said, "Stop me if I'm overstepping, but... I've spent a lot of time with Ann since the whole Leviathan thing. Well, not in person, but vid calls and letters and... well, I'm no expert, but I'm pretty sure I know that glazed over look in your eyes. I've seen it here and there since you woke up. Ann gets it too sometimes..."

Shepard downed her drink in one gulp, the liquid burning it's way down her throat. "Do you know if she's found a way to keep it at bay?"

"You'd have to ask her," he said, shrugging again. "Should I let her know you might be stopping by?" he asked, standing and adjusting his belt.

"Sure. Thanks, James," Shepard said with a bitter smile.

"Hey, no problem, Commander," he said, stepping away from the couch to leave her with her thoughts. "Oh! and Felicitationes, Lola. You deserve some happy."

She tipped her empty glass in thanks as he walked out, then set it on a nearby table. She leaned forward and buried her face in her palms. She was exhausted. James must have tipped off Garrus as to where she was because moments later, the door opened and he strode in to drop sloppily beside her. "There she is," he said, leaning his head on her shoulder as she sat up to greet him.

"Someone's deep in their cups," she teased as the scent of alcohol wafted off him.

"And someone else is shallow in theirs," he said, as his addled brain figured out her expression.

She snorted and leaned over to rest her head on his. "I suppose you could say it that way." He picked up her hand and played with her fingers. "I'm just not in the mood for a party."

"Tired?" he hummed as he slowly tipped her hand this way and that so the sapphire caught the light from different angles and shimmered.

"Exhausted," she agreed.

He shifted and she lifted her head to let him up. "Then let's get you to bed," he smiled, offering her his hand.

"But everyone is partying because of us," she reminded him.

"Honestly, I really don't think at this point that they are going to miss us," he pointed out nudging his hand further toward her.

Finally she took it and he pulled her up. Instead of moving to leave, she purposefully fell into his arms and he hummed appreciatively. "Dance with me?" she requested. The hum of the party music outside the room gave them a beat and they began to sway.

"I think I'm a bit too drunk to tango," he said apologetically.

"That's okay," she said, burying her face between his neck and his cowl. "This is perfect."

 


	42. Rationing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard decides to do something about the dwindling supply of dextro rations.

About a week after their engagement party, Shepard was starting to get concerned about their dwindling supply of dextro rations. The repairs to the Citadel and the Crucible were coming along, but in her opinion, not quickly enough. On her ship alone she had three dextros to feed. Planet-side, there were more stranded Turians that were in even more dire straights than her people. She was sitting in the mess hall, watching Tali and Reeger at the other end of the table talking quietly and sitting rather close together. Tali had braved switching on the Geth in her suit two days prior, but the added immuno boosters wouldn't keep her from starving to death if they ran out of food. She crumbled up the empty wrapper of her own ration bar and tossed it angrily on the table. "That's frustrated face," she heard Garrus say as he appeared beside her and sat down in the nearest chair.

He had a mug in his hands which he set on the table. "Have you had breakfast yet?" she asked accusingly.

He pulled his mandibles closer to his face and sat back in his chair refusing to meet her eyes. "I'm not hungry," he said in a low voice.

"Bullshit," she hissed. She scooted her chair closer to his so they could talk quietly. "You will spend hours making sure I'm taken care of, but when it comes to your own well being, you'd rather hand over your rations to someone else."

"We don't have a lot of options here, Shepard. Their immune systems are weaker than mine. If I skip a few meals, my body isn't going to turn on me quite as quickly as theirs," he replied calmly taking up his mug and sipping the kava.

She pressed her lips together, her fists clenching. "That's it. Grab yourself a ration bar then suit up. We're going on a trip."

"What? Where?" he asked, his left browplate rising over his visor and his mandibles flicking curiously.

"The Citadel," she said, gathering her trash and her unfinished mug as she stood. "Nobody knows those streets better than you and I need a tour guide."

As she went to throw her trash away, she reached in the cabinet above her head and grabbed two dextro ration bars and a couple for herself, pocketing them before he could see them. She was going to scour as many of the wards as she could. The Citadel had to have stores of both dextro and levo food. It was the center of Galactic infrastructure for Pete's sake. The Turians planet-side had an excuse to not search there for rations, they had no way of getting there. She had a working ship and working shuttles. How had no one else thought of this?

* * *

 

She had donned her armor because for some reason it made her feel more secure than going to the Citadel in her civvies. She'd packed her pistol as well and she was waiting by the Kodiak for Garrus. "Something going on, Shepard?" Steve asked her when he spotted her decked out in armor and fiddling with her omnitool. She was searching for the best possible places to hunt down supplies and marking the nav points.

"Nothing important. I'm taking Garrus with me to the Citadel to hunt down some dextro rations. Hopefully, we will find enough to help out planet-side," she informed him.

"Did you need me to fly you there?" he asked.

She waved him off. "You have better things to do here. Try and keep this quiet. I don't want to make a fuss until I find something. The Citadel was pretty trashed, and I can't be certain that there will be anything left to salvage."

Steve nodded. "Whatever you say, Shepard. Good luck."

She grinned. "I'm certain we're going to need it," she said as the elevator hissed open and Garrus stepped out in all of his gear. "Ready, Big Guy?"

He joined her and greeted Steve. "What are you up to, Shepard?"

"Just get in the shuttle," she said, still grinning. She was actually excited to spend the day with him, even if it was to hunt for food. She playfully shoved him in the Kodiak and climbed in behind him with a wink to Steve before closing the hatch.

Garrus sat in the co pilot's seat as she started the engine. She piloted the shuttle to the Citadel and as they approached Zakera ward, she looked out over the destruction. "It's still a mess down there," Garrus observed.

"Well, I'm hoping to find some gems in that mess," she mused as she hunted for a good spot to touch down. "This was the center of the galaxy. Every arm was a city in itself. Billions of people lived here. They must have supplies."

"That's actually genius," he said as the Kodiak dropped down and landed in a rubble free section of Zakera ward.

"You sound surprised," she teased.

He chuckled. "Not surprised, just a little disappointed that nobody else seemed to think of it."

"I'm sure someone did, but I'm the only one with a working shuttle and a personal investment in finding dextro rations," she said with a grin. She stood up from her seat and stretched. "Ready?"

"Absolutely," he said, following her out of the shuttle.

The ward was banged up and the faint smell of burning lingered in the air. She pulled up a few of the nav points on her omnitool as he stepped up behind her and read over her shoulder, his face inches from hers. "I was thinking we could start in some of the grocery stores and if they turn up empty, there are plenty of restaurants and bars we can pick through." she said around her racing heart. He was so close and it had been so long.

He rumbled in his chest as he reached around her to point out the nearest navpoint. "This looks like a good place to start the hunt," he said, his voice heady.

"Mmhmm," she agreed, her shaky fingers plotting the navpoint.

She took a deep breath and moved to step away from him, but he gently grabbed her arm and held her in place. He buried his face in her neck, her hair shifting as he inhaled deeply. Her knees almost turned to jelly. "You smell fantastic," he rumbled as he purred deep in his chest. She spun in his arms and urgently reached up and grabbed the back of his neck, her fingers slipping over the soft flesh beneath his fringe as she pressed her lips to his. He answered in turn, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her against him. Their armor clacked together and she moaned in her throat as she wished she hadn't worn it. He pulled away first, dragging a frustrated laugh from her throat as they shared breathing air as they both panted, their foreheads pressed together. "Spirits, your pheromones are nearly as strong as before the Collector base, Shepard."

"The more you tease me like this, the worse it's going to get, Big Guy," she choked out around her short breath. She pried herself away from him, her palms lingering over his chest as they slipped down from his neck. "Tell you what... let's find you a few hearty meals first... Then we'll make a night of it."

He tucked her mussed hair behind her ears. "You sure you're up for it?"

"I've managed to avoid weird for almost a week. I'm still healthy, according to Miranda... I'm pretty sure a relaxing night will do me some good," she said, reaching up to stroke his cheek with her gloved thumb. He turned his head into her touch and purred softly. "Now, let's get going before I lose my train of thought again."

He let her go this time, and she rolled her shoulders and adjusted her chest plate, trying to shake off her arousal and set her mind to task. Garrus fell in to her left, his subvocals still purring softly. They picked their way through the debris on the ground toward the grocery that she had marked on her map. Every where they looked something was destroyed. Shattered glass, crumbled buildings and flickering lights gave the ward a very eerie feel. She'd spent most of her time recently in the Presidium whenever she'd come to the Citadel, and the neon lights of the ward made her feel much more at home than the pristine white brightness of the embassies and the commons. She sighed contentedly as they came upon the grocery. The building itself looked mostly intact and she had high hopes that they wouldn't have to hunt very far. She had never been on the Citadel when it was so quiet and as odd as it was, it still felt warm to her. Not like the ghost town that it was. Maybe it was being here alone with Garrus or maybe it was the tiny piece of her that was helping to keep the station alive. Whatever it was, she had never felt more at home, except for when she was on the Normandy.

She switched her visor on to scan the area for any signs of life while she scanned the rest of the situation with her omnitool. "There's no heat signatures," she sighed. "Not that I expected any."

"It would have been nice to maybe find someone alive in here, but I'm fairly certain that everyone who was here when the Reapers took the station either fled or were killed when the station was destroyed," he mused, wiping some dust from the glass of the storefront to peer inside.

"I'm lucky Aria and her people were smart enough to jump ship at the right time. Otherwise, she might have been killed, too."

He turned to glance at her and sneered. "The people of Omega always did remind me of cockroaches."

"Those cockroaches saved my life," she said with a small smirk.

"And I'm grateful, but that doesn't mean I have to like her or the way she operates," he said.

Shepard chuckled. "Distaste accepted. Come on, let's get inside and see if we struck gold." She hacked open the locked door and it hissed open. The smell that greeted her was of rotten fruit and spoiled meat. "Ugh," she complained, stepping back. "Let's hope that the non-perishables are in better shape."

She stepped inside the store and glanced around. It looked like an earthquake had hit the place. Mostly everything was shaken from the shelves still standing and the toppled shelves made for an interesting maze through the aisles. They split up, hunting through the mess for any dextro rations. "Hey, Shepard," he called from somewhere near the back of the store. "I didn't bring my hacking programs. Wanna help me with this door?"

"Coming," she answered, grabbing up a few dextro bars she saw lying in a pile amidst a few boxes of Hostess cakes that had probably been imported from Earth like they were gold. She unfolded the small backpack she had brought from a pocket on her thigh and dropped the bars in before picking her way toward where his voice had come from. "Ooh storage," she said excitedly, finding him standing in front of a large door. She lifted her arm and picked the electronic door lock. "There," she said as the red lock flashed to green. He pulled the door open and they were greeted with darkness. She brought up the flashlight on her omnitool and lifted her arm to shine it into the area. "Holy Canoli!" she whispered. The room was completely filled from floor to ceiling. A narrow aisle cut through the middle of the crates and boxes that were stacked up on either side. She flicked her wrist from right to left and realized that the aisle served as a divider to separate the dextro and levo products.

Garrus nudged her. She glanced over at him and he was grinning widely. "Good find..."

She shrugged, returning his smile. "Technically you found the room."

He chuckled. "A couple more finds like this and we'll not only be feeding the Normandy, but we'll be able to feed every Turian and Quarian that may be stuck in the Sol System.

"Let's head back to the shuttle. Do you think there is a small place we can land near here to stock up?" she suggested.

"You head to the shuttle and I'll hunt us a landing zone," he said, closing the door.

"Good idea," she agreed. She lifted up on her toes and kissed his mandible before turning to pick her way back through the store.

* * *

 

She felt strange on the walk back to the shuttle. The peaceful homeyness she'd felt while they hunted was replaced by a creepy hair raising loneliness. She remembered as a child she had never liked the basement in her home. Whenever her mother had sent her down there to do chores, she had felt cold and jumpy. She'd always done what needed to be done and scurried out as quickly as she could, feeling the hands of the darkness grabbing at her ankles as she ran up the stairs. She had a similar feeling now. The hair on the back of her neck was standing up and she swore that if she turned around, someone was going to be standing there. She quickened her pace and jerked around mid stride as a cold breeze tickled across her shoulders. She was in full armor. She couldn't feel breezes. Nothing was there as she stood staring behind her. She backed up, meaning to turn around and continue toward the shuttle but she bumped into something solid.

She froze, knowing it was not logical that there was actually something there. She'd been walking in a wide open area. Her breath was coming in short gasps as she slowly turned to see what she had collided with. She was greeted by a horrible vision of herself. The woman before her wore the charcoal armor that she recognized as that of her own armor after Harbinger had melted it to her skin. Her body was heavily burned and bruised. Had she looked this bad when she'd been transported by the beam to the Citadel? She squinted at the figure and it's lips parted to reveal a bloody grin. "You and your kind have overstayed your welcome in this galaxy," she said, her voice a disgusting mix of her own and the deep gravely demon voice of Leviathan.

Now it made sense. She was alone and she had no Catalyst to protect her mind. Apparently, Leviathan had figured that out. She crossed her arms and glanced around, trying to recall where Dr. Bryson's lab had been. It was likely that the protective shielding they had erected around the artifact had shut down. The power in the area was hardly reliable. "I took down the Reapers. If anyone has overstayed their welcome, it's your ancient ass. Rest assured, as soon as I can, I'm coming for you."

"Your confidence is singular," the hallucination said.

"You said that before on Despoina. I'm fairly certain you underestimated me," she retorted angrily.

"You've taken control of the Intelligence. We would know how," it demanded.

"Best of luck," she said, shivering. She stepped through the illusion, enough of her self intact that she realized it was messing with her thoughts like it had while she spoke to it from inside the Diver Mech.

She began counting her steps and focusing on putting one foot in front of the other to block out Leviathan's influence. It was hard fought to push it out and she had a feeling this was only the beginning. She trudged angrily to the shuttle and concentrated hard on what she was doing. Letting her mind wander was not going to get her anywhere. She felt cold in spite of her armor's built in environment stabilizer. She needed to get back to her rock. Garrus. The only person who had been able to wake her from her nightmare and bring her back to reality. His proximity kept her sane.

She switched off the shuttle's autopilot, preferring to keep her brain occupied as she flew back to where Garrus was. "Hey, Big Guy," she choked through her comm. "Did you find me a landing spot?"

The line crackled for a second before his voice hummed through the receiver. "You sound upset. Everything okay?"

"I'll fill you in when I land," she promised. "I'm okay though," she added.

She heard the grumble over the mic before he said, "Coordinates sent. Do you need me to stand there and wave my arms?"

She chuckled. "No, I think I can find it."

She followed the Navpoint he'd sent her and soon was landing on a small patch of grass that had probably been part of one of the community gardens on the ward. It was less than thirty yards from the store. He was waiting outside the shuttle when she hopped out and he looked her up and down before asking, "So, what happened?"

"Are we nearby where Bryson's lab was?" she asked.

He glanced around and seemed to think back. "I never went there with you, but I think so."

"After we're done here, we need to get there and check on the Artifact. I think the shielding was damaged in the fallout. Leviathan tried to bully me while I was alone."

She noticed her shaking hands when he took them in his. "Did it hurt you?"

"It's all in my head, it can't really _do_ anything besides threaten and give me a wiggins. I'd still like to contain it though," she said with a shiver.

"Of course," he said, letting her hands go. "We'll load the shuttle up and then head straight there."

They set to work and Shepard radioed EDI for the exact coordinates to Bryson's lab and a copy of the algorithm she'd used to construct the shield. By the time the shuttle was filled, Shepard was sweating from carrying crates and boxes back and forth, but it was worth every aching muscle to have this much food on hand. She saved the navpoint and re-locked the storage room for the future. After Bryson's lab, she intended to hunt down a few more stores and see if they had as much on hand.

Garrus took the pilot's seat and she dropped into the seat beside him with a grunt. "You still up for making a night of it when we're finished?" he asked with a sideways grin as he input the coordinates EDI had provided.

"Oh, absolutely," she said returning the grin and nudging him with her foot before crossing her ankles up on the unused copilot's console. The rode halfway to Bryson's lab in silence, both eyeing each other with varying degrees of lust. There was a lot to do before they could turn in for the evening. She rummaged in her bag and tossed him one of the blue wrapped ration bars she'd stolen from the Normandy's stores that morning. "You'd better make sure you've got plenty of energy, Big Guy." She pulled out her own lunch and started in on it.

"Keep talking like that and we won't make it to the night, Shepard." His voice was strained. "This is a very small space and you are throwing a _lot_ of pheromones my way."

"Sorry, I don't mean to waft, but it's been a _really_ long time," she stressed, dropping her feet back to the floor and trying to sit a bit less seductively for his sake.

"I'm well aware," he agreed. "I hope you still have some of that aloe you used to keep around for chafing."

She crumbled up her empty wrapper and chucked it at him with a strangled half laugh. "How dare you! You tell me to cool it down then threaten to nail me so hard I'll be walking funny." His chuckle was as teasing as hers had been pained. She sat back and crossed her arms over her chest. "Damned sexy Turian."

"You can't deny that you love it," he hummed.

She refused to reply. She turned her attention out the window to look down on the ward as it whizzed by beneath them. The shuttle slowed and began to descend onto the landing area outside Bryson's lab. The typical cold dark feeling associated with Leviathan was definitely permeating the area. "It's here," she said as her blood turned to ice in her veins.

She jumped when his hand fell on her shoulder, but she shot him an apologetic look when he went to remove it. "We'll take care of it," he promised getting up from his seat. He pulled his widow off his back and clicked it open. The barrel and scope slipped from their hiding places and he flipped off the safety. "Do you want to wait here?"

She frowned. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to shatter the damned thing," he said as if her question made no sense.

Her gut clenched. "No," she whimpered and reached for his arm as he moved to exit the shuttle. She had no control of herself. She panicked on the inside, clawing for purchase in her own body. Something switched over in her mind and a whispered word changed Garrus from the man she loved into a threat. She screamed as she was caged inside herself. "No," her mouth said again and she heard the awful double voice of Leviathan.

Garrus growled as he realized what was happening. "Stay there, Shepard. Don't make me hurt you." She was seeing red as he backed toward the shuttle hatch. She stood, her arms stiff at her sides, her breath ragged and sharp as she tried to fight the compulsion. Training from her cadet days swam through her mind. Her eyes flicked from Garrus' knees to his mandibles to his fringe and back down to the backs of his legs where the thin delicate spurs jutted up from his calves. "Shepard," he barked again, the flanging thick in his voice as he sent a warning from his throat that spoke to her most basic instincts.

Her eyes flicked to his and something deep inside her pushed to the surface. She clenched her fists and her knees twitched as she fought her body from charging him. "Get out of here!" she managed to shout.

Without hesitation, he slammed his fist into the hatch release, his eyes never leaving hers. He backed out quickly and locked the shuttle behind him. She'd never seen him move so fast. When he disappeared from her sight, the animal inside her shrieked in anger and she threw herself at the locked door, pounding and kicking at the thick metal. Moments later, the beast turned to look at her in her cage inside her mind and snarled before fizzling out of existence. The cage also winked out of existence and she 'woke up' on her hands and knees amidst the crowd of boxes on the floor of the shuttle. Hot tears streamed down her cheeks and she collapsed with her back against the side of the shuttle. She could hardly breathe around the knot in her chest. She had just stared down Garrus and thought about doing things to him that she hated she even knew how to do. _Throw it off balance, foot to the knee, grip the mandible lift up and out, knife under the fringe and separate it from the scalp, snap the bony spur to incapacitate..._ Picturing him dead at her feet, his blue blood seeping over her hands made her nauseous. The scene replayed over and over in her head what felt like a billion times before the shuttle hatch lifted open. She flinched away from him at first as he approached. When he said her name, all affection and comfort, she sobbed and threw herself at his kneeling form beside her.

He gripped her tightly in his arms and she clung to him like he was the last lifeline she had on a sinking ship. "I'm so sorry," she sobbed, as his fingers ran gently through her hair. She was in his lap and he rocked her slowly cooing softly against her head.

"It's okay," he whispered.

She yanked herself away from him. "No, it's not. I could have killed you. You have no idea how..."

He pulled her back against him, cutting off her confession. "I'm not completely defenseless, Shepard," he said, his voice shaking.

"When it comes to me, yes you are," she sighed, trying to unravel the tightness in her chest.

He flinched as her words hit home. "It's true, I wouldn't relish having to subdue you..."

She pulled away again. "Promise me. If you _ever_ see me looking at you like that again, or anyone else, you won't let me do anything horrible." She placed a hand on his mandible and turned his head so he was looking her in the eyes. "You promise me, Garrus Vakarian. You will take me down." He attempted to look away from her but she put her other hand on the other side of his face and held his gaze. "Promise me."

His eyes rolled in a very human gesture as he accepted her authority. "Every Turian knows how to follow bad orders..."

"You're a terrible Turian... now promise me," she insisted.

His head fell forward so their foreheads met. "I promise," he whispered almost too low to hear.

She took her hands from his cheeks and wrapped them around his neck again. She cuddled up in his lap and they sat there quietly as both of their hearts calmed down. Finally, she cleared her throat and slowly pulled away from him. "We should uh... Should visit a few more groceries and see if we can find enough to send planet-side."

He grabbed her hand as she made to brush the remains of her dried up tears from her cheeks. "Are you sure you're going to be alright?"

She managed a half smile that convinced no one. "You destroyed the artifact. Unless there is another one close enough, I don't think Leviathan can take control of me like it just did. I'll let you know if I start to feel cold. I promise."

He looked like he was ready to protest, but instead he sighed and his mandibles clamped tight to his face. She got out of his lap and offered him a hand up which he took, his fingers lingering in hers before he let go to get back in the pilot's seat. "Where's the next nav point?"

She sat in her seat and pulled up the tagged navpoints on her map. They dropped in on four more grocery stores, two of which were stocked enough to at least put a dent in the crisis. The artificial lighting on the Citadel was starting to fade, making it at least 6PM Earth time. "Think we should pack it up?" she asked quietly.

He hummed in assent. She leaned her head back on her head rest, closed her eyes and trusted him to get them home. After a shorter amount of time than she imagined, she felt the shuttle descending. "At least one thing survived," he said softly as she opened her eyes to see he had guided them to the parking garage around the corner from her apartment. "I think we deserve a night without anything to worry about, and I don't know about you, but I could use a stiff drink." He turned to face her as the engines powered down, a hopeful smile on his face.

She smiled at his ability to brush off their current crisis and do something to surprise her. "Race you to the hot tub," she said, jumping from her seat and opening the hatch. As it slipped aside, she crouched to get out before it fully opened and took off through the deserted lot.

She could hear him laughing behind her as he calmly locked up the shuttle and casually strolled after her. "This is going to look like one of those awful human slasher vids. No matter how fast you run, I'll pace you just by walking," he taunted.

She slowed to turn and jog backwards for a few feet. "Your mouth is less aerodynamic than your body, Vakarian, and I have long legs for a human." Then she turned and started off forward again. She heard his footsteps begin to echo more quickly as he switched to a jog. He caught up to her with no trouble, his body built for speeds that she could never hope to reach. He grabbed her around the waist and stopped her in her tracks. "Hey!" she complained, laughing.

He didn't skip a beat in passing her up and she growled. She'd let him win the shooting contest. No way was she letting him beat her in a foot race. She pushed off her back foot and sprinted to catch him. When she was close enough, she launched herself onto his back and he laughed, easily catching his balance as her weight landed on him. She wrapped her legs around his waist and her palms gripped his shoulder pads. He caught her and gripped her thighs to help support her. She hiked herself up further and he started forward giving her a piggy back ride. "Did your poor human legs get tired?"

"No," she murmured, leaning around his carapace to breathe on his neck. "I'm saving my stamina for much more important things."

His answer was a licentious purr as his grip tightened on her thighs. "You are the biggest tease..."

"I live to serve," she continued, the tone of her voice lowering to a more sensual hum as her body tightened deep down. "Now walk faster or we won't make it to the hot tub."

* * *

 

Shepard stood in front of her refrigerator, a sheet clutched in her left hand as her right held open the door. "VI, have there been any power outages?" she asked.

"There have been no extended power interruptions reported in the last year," the female voice assured her.

That meant that her frozen pizzas were still edible. She did a private cheer and closed the door to preheat the oven before returning to the freezer to fish through and see what kind of dextro food she had stocked. As she stared at the blue coded packages, Garrus shuffled up behind her and his arms wrapped around her. She leaned back into him, enjoying the warmth that radiated off his body. "You know what I just realized?"

"What's that?" he rumbled, his mandibles ruffling her hair as he nuzzled her neck, kissing behind her ear.

She snorted. "I have absolutely no idea how to prepare a Turian meal."

He laughed, his breath hot on her neck. "I'm perfectly capable of fending for myself." He reached around her and effortlessly grabbed a few items from the freezer.

"If I'm going to be a Vakarian, I should probably learn," she admitted, biting her lip and turning to face him as he fished through the cabinets looking for the cooking utensils he needed. He had thrown on the Turian equivalent of a pair of shorts and she smiled at how adorable he looked hunting down a skillet half naked in her kitchen. She was broken from her thoughts when the oven chimed that it was ready for her pizza. She dug the box from the freezer and dropped the frozen thing down on the counter. "I'll be back."

She shuffled from the kitchen and into the downstairs guest room to find a large t shirt. She had left a few there for when she wanted to work out. She dropped the sheet and slipped the shirt down over her head. It covered enough. It was just the two of them after all. Then she went back to the kitchen and found him using the island burners to fry up something that actually smelled pretty appetizing. He looked up as she walked in and grinned. She strutted past him, her bare feet padding silently across the tile floor. She made a show of her preparations and he chuckled. "Keep distracting me and I'm going to burn the first real meal I've had in ages," he said with a grin.

She slipped the tray of pizza in the oven and then sat across from him on one of the bar stools, resting her chin on one of her fists to watch what he was doing. "You know, I was one of the best chefs in basic training."

"Is that so?" he said, returning his attention to the skillet and pouring an odd smelling sauce on top of the cooking meat. "Where'd you learn?"

She picked at a small divot in the finished wood of the counter top with her fingernail. "My mom taught me. She was the best cook..." Her voice trailed off as one of the memories from her Leviathan nightmare flashed across her mind, trying to poison the real memories she had of her mother.

He gave her a moment before he said anything. "That's where I learned what I know too. Solana was never interested, but mom made the both of us help her in the kitchen. She always said, 'a well fed Turian is a happy Turian.' Dad would deny it, but as mom told it, she won him over with her food before her pheromones."

Shepard smiled as he talked about his family. She loved listening to him tell stories about his childhood. They had done so much of that on the SR1 and she almost missed it. "Your mom sounds like my kind of woman," she said, her voice sympathetic. It had barely been a year since he'd lost his mother. It seemed like forever ago when they'd stood in the Main Battery and he'd told her how his mom had passed.

"She would have loved you," he agreed. "Now dad on the other hand, I think he might just keel over when he finds out that his only son wants to bring a human SPECTRE into the family."

"Maybe if you teach me to cook like a Turian, I can win him over, too," she teased.

He looked up from his skillet again and cocked his head. "You're serious, aren't you?"

She shrugged. "I can be domestic. I might as well know how to do it for more than one species."

He hummed in thought. "Teach an alien who can't season by taste, lest her stomach explode..."

"Worst case scenario," she interrupted.

"...Lest her stomach explode," he repeated with a small smirk. "To cook for a Turian... okay, Shepard. Challenge accepted," he said.

* * *

 

The credits started rolling on the vid they had decided to watch after they'd stuffed their faces. Garrus glanced down at his mate who had up until about 20 minutes ago, insisted rather groggily that she was still awake. Her cheek rested on his thigh and she was curled up in a tight ball on the couch beneath a thin blanket, snoring softly. They had both had a really tough day. When she had turned that murderous look on him, his heart had nearly shattered into a million pieces. That million had become two million when he'd had to use his threatening voice on her. The promise she'd forced him to make weighed heavily on his chest as he watched her sleep.

"Shepard," he whispered lightly, gently nudging her. "The movie is over. We should go to bed."

Her eyes remained closed as her forehead crinkled and she tucked her knees even closer to her chest. "S'over?" she mumbled, before the frown disappeared and she shifted just enough so her hair fell over her face.

He loathed to wake her, but he could tell she was cold. He slipped out from under her head and just as he was going to attempt to pick her up and carry her to bed, his omnitool chimed noisily. He grumbled in annoyance stepping out of the living room and out of earshot to answer the vid call. "Liara? What's going on?" he asked when he saw it was her.

She squinted at him, probably trying to figure out where he was. "Is everything okay? I've been trying to reach Shepard for over an hour."

"She must have switched off her omnitool," he sighed.

"Where are you?" she asked.

"Shepard's apartment on the Citadel. She had the brilliant idea this morning to come here and hunt through the wards for dextro rations. We've been here all day... There was... an incident, so I brought her here to try and take her mind off it."

"An incident?" Liara asked, her voice flooding with concern.

"We uh... Shepard discovered that the Leviathan artifact in Bryson's lab was unprotected. The shielding must have fallen when the Citadel lost power. We went to take care of it and Leviathan responded pretty violently."

"Is everyone okay?" Liara asked, her voice gentle as always.

"She's sleeping now. I had to lock Shepard in the shuttle while I destroyed the artifact." He felt a keen threatening in his throat as he recalled the way Shepard had looked at him. "She lost it... Liara, I watched her eyes pick out every weakness I had before she was able to gain enough control over herself to not attack me."

"I'm so sorry, Garrus. I can't imagine how that must have felt."

He let out a wry chuckle. "No offense, Liara, but your boyfriend looks at everyone like that all of the time."

She pursed her lips as she attempted not to smile. "I suppose that's fair. Are you two going to be there all night, then?"

"I don't want to disturb her. She doesn't sleep much anymore. She thinks I don't notice..." he admitted.

"I understand. I'll let the rest of the crew know... Did you manage to find anything of value?"

He nodded. "We packed the shuttle and marked the nav points of some more places that were well stocked. It should be enough to hold us, and the Turians stranded ground-side, over until we fix the relays. And we only checked Zakera Ward. There are plenty more neighborhoods around the arms that are likely as well stocked or better."

"That's very good news," Liara said with a smile. "Goodnight, Garrus."

"Goodnight," he replied and ended the call, then set his own omnitool to silent. When he returned to the couch where he'd left Shepard, she was tossing around and whimpering softly. The frown was back on her forehead. He rushed to kneel beside her and placed his hands on her, one on her upper arm and the other over her forehead to help still her. "It's okay," he cooed as he ran fingers through her hair. She whimpered a few more times before her eyes flew open and she nearly punched him in her attempt to fight off the dream that was plaguing her. Her head whipped around as she took in her surroundings and when her eyes fell on him, she flung herself at him, sobbing. He comforted her with meaningless words and a calming hum in his chest as he hugged her close. "It was just a dream," he assured her.

She took a deep shuddering breath and said, "It was _so_ real..."

She was trembling in his arms, her entire body affected. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I'd rather pretend it never happened," she said, pulling away from him and her feet hitting the floor as she sat up. She was absently rubbing her palms on the surface of the couch. When she looked down at them, she almost growled, her lip curled back in disgust, and lifted her hands to tuck them under her armpits. She glanced at him, her eyes not meeting his before she stood and moved past him to make her way around the bar, still hugging herself. "In fact, I would rather drown it before the image can burn itself into my mind." She pulled her hands from under her arms and carefully knelt behind the bar to grab a bottle of dark brown liquid and a glass. She unscrewed the lid from the bottle and tipped it lightly to begin pouring it into the glass, but before the booze even reached the top of the bottle to pour out, she angrily shoved the glass away and sipped directly from the bottle.

"Shepard," he chided, moving to sit across from her. Her free hand was now rubbing up and down on the shirt she was wearing. "I can't help you if you won't talk to me."

She checked the wandering hand and set it flat on the bar to stare at it for a moment, the other still clutching the bottle. She took another swig from the bottle and then offered it to him. He shook his head and she sighed, her shoulders deflating. "Talking about it will make it real. Like the woods..."

He knew she had been having bad dreams throughout the war, but she had never wanted to tell him anything about them. She would startle awake, huddle closer to him and refuse to talk about it. "We are stronger together. Let me in, Shepard. I can help. Or at least listen."

She let out a horribly choked half chuckle that nearly turned into a sob before sipping from the bottle. "We _are_ stronger together. That's the problem. Leviathan has figured that out."

"Then we fight him together," he insisted. He felt powerless and he hated it. His mate was suffering and there was little he could do besides be there for her.

She still refused to look at him. Her free hand now twisted the glass in circles, creating small sparkling beams of light on the bar as the dim back-lights shone through it. She lifted the bottle and turned the reflections brown by filling the glass. Then she tucked the bottle back under the bar and grabbed him a bottle of Drossix Blue. "Drink with me, please."

As he took the bottle from her hand, he chuckled softly. "Why do you even have this stuff in a levo based domicile, Shepard?"

"It has a warning label," she said, coming around from the bar and sitting back down on the couch.

"That's because it will literally explode a human's stomach if they try to drink it," he said joining her.

She forced her body to relax, lounging against the arm of the couch and lifting her feet to rest on his lap. He could see the stiffness in her feigned casualness as she sipped from her glass. He set the bottle on the coffee table in front of them and took one of her feet in his hand to gently massage her insole. After a few minutes of silence she spoke. "I could hear every inch of sinew ripping as I tore your fringe up with my bare hands. It was like nails on a chalkboard, but I couldn't stop. It was like I was watching myself from somewhere deep inside." A single tear fell from her left eye and she quickly brushed it away. "I screamed and beat on the cage, but I couldn't get out. My body wouldn't listen to my mind. Someone else had control. When I looked around, everyone else laid dead and mangled in an almost perfect circle around me. I was coated in blood of all colors like some sick painting. Then, you know what I did? I smiled." She took a larger gulp from the glass before plunking it down on the coffee table. She looked at her hands. "I can still see the blood on my hands."

He released her foot and took her hands in his. He made a point of turning them over and over, studying them. "There's no blood on your hands, Shepard. You didn't kill anyone and I will be here to make sure that never happens. I'm with you until we find this bastard. Then I'll rip it apart myself."

She sighed, "I'm so tired of fighting, Garrus."

"I know," he agreed, using his talon to gently lift her chin so she would have to look at him. "We'll get through this. We always do."

Finally, her stunning green eyes met his and a half smile tugged at her lips. "I need something to shoot."

"You know, there is a combat simulator right around the corner," he prompted, hoping to help distract her. As much as she probably needed the sleep, he knew there was no way she would get any more tonight. As a matter of fact, he was almost as shaken as she was. The fact that Leviathan saw him as a genuine threat to it's plans made him feel both proud and a little scared. They needed to get the Citadel fixed fast so they could go take care of this and get on with their lives. Shepard should be dreaming of how to incorporate both human and Turian traditions into one joining ceremony, not of ripping her friends apart with her bare hands. It wasn't fair.

 


	43. Caged in her own Mind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leviathan wreaks havoc with Shepard and her mind.

Shepard refused to let her people get complacent. After she and Garrus had discovered that the combat simulator was still functional, she had begun scheduling mandatory training sessions for everyone who wanted to stick around and join the fight against Leviathan. She stood in her armor outside the ring, watching her crew and lending guidance where it was needed. The issue she was seeing was that it had been two weeks and they were starting to breeze through the sims far too easily. She sighed as she watched Kaidan and Liara destroy a holo with a strong biotic combo that they had clearly planned ahead of time. She slammed her hand down on the cease fire button. "Alright folks, lets wrap it up for today," she called out.

Jack turned to complain up at her from her place on the ground. "We still have a hour left, Shepard! What gives?"

Shepard crossed her arms and stared down at the small, barely armored woman. Had she even bothered to gear up? Her simulation pistol full of blanks hung limp in her hand. Shepard sneered and flicked her wrist, unleashing a drastically weakened shockwave that skipped over the ledge and directly for Jack. Before she could react, the shockwave hit her, barely phasing the souped up girl, but she still felt it. She hadn't even had a barrier up. She stumbled backwards a few steps before Shepard raised an eyebrow and her hands hit her hips. She paced in front of the simulator controls. "Show of hands. How many of you have been planning your strategies before coming down here?" Several of them shuffled their feet and glanced back and forth between each other. Jack glared up at Shepard, but did not retaliate for the shockwave. "Come on. Don't be shy," Shepard goaded. Nearly everyone there raised their hands except for Javik who stood in a corner, his own arms crossed over his chest and staring out over everyone there with his four eyes. He didn't need to raise his hand for her to know he'd been guilty. Shepard sighed as they all looked at each other and hands slowly began to fall back to sides. "Dismissed."

Her tech group was due in two hours for their session, but she decided to clean up the arena and cancel the group training. The biotics all shuffled out, leaving a small mess behind. She took the stairs down to the arena and started to pick up the toppled bits of plastic and metal that were used as cover and overturned by the accumulated power of several biotics throwing their skills around willy-nilly. A low buzzing in her ears was giving her a headache and she attributed it to the rising of her blood pressure as she stressed out over how she was going to challenge her crew to get better. They would soon be battling an ancient race of organics with unknown abilities. They needed to be ready.

As she wracked her brain for ideas, she suddenly thought of Aria and her band of unpredictable mercs. She carefully placed the heavy metal barrier she'd picked up and glanced around to see if there was anything left. Only a few pieces remained out of place and she waved them off, before heading for the exit that the rest of her people had already left from. She stepped outside into the neon glow of the ward and saw that the others had left in one of the two shuttles that they'd brought, leaving her alone. She crossed the narrow street that separated her apartment building from the arena, passed the furniture fabrication store in her lobby and irritably slammed the button for the elevator inside. She needed to blow off steam and Garrus was busy with his duties on the Normandy. She tapped her foot as the elevator carried her to her apartment and spilled her into the narrow hallway. She input the codes to let herself in and was greeted rather startlingly by a ghostly image of Admiral Anderson. The buzzing in her head intensified and she realized that Leviathan was trying to mess with her again. "Can't I just be alone inside my own head?" she asked the sneering image of Anderson.

"Why do you fight?" he asked in the eerie double voice that she'd grown almost used to. "Once we ruled the galaxy. Without the Reapers, we will do so again. It is certain."

"Nothing is certain," she argued, stripping her gloves off and slamming the door behind her before making her way to the spare bedroom where her punching bag was. The rest of her armor soon joined the gauntlets in a pile inside the closet and she changed into a pair of leggings and a comfortable half shirt.

She did her best to ignore the taunting of the creature inside her head. She breathed calmly as she wrapped her hands before beginning an angry session against the faceless bag. Leviathan did not like to be ignored. It shifted from one form to another, trying to goad her into a reaction. Her headache was intense by the time it finally gave up for the time being. She sighed in relief and resumed her pummeling of the bag. Her fists glowed softly with her uncontrolled biotics as she fought the emotional roller coaster she was going through. Harder and harder she punched the bag as her rage with Leviathan poured out from the tight box she'd shoved it in so she could keep a strong face for Garrus. She was spiraling. Her dreams were getting worse and Leviathan's invisible (to everyone but her) taunting was becoming more and more frequent. It would show up whenever it felt like it to either talk shit or simply stare at her from behind her friends making her look all the more crazy as she seemed to glare at absolutely nothing. She knew it looked nuts, but she couldn't help the reaction when a random person from her past appeared to invade her life. Her only saving grace was that without the artifact's power, it seemed unable to take control of her body. It was toothless.

The sharp clearing of a flanged throat behind her made her jump. She stopped hitting the bag, grabbing it between her palms to steady it as it swung violently from the force she'd been using. If it could, the bag probably would have sighed with relief. She saw the blue glow from her biotics halfway up her arms, but she didn't care to reign them in. When she turned to see Garrus standing in the doorway, she sighed. "Are you really here?" It was a moment of weakness, but she was exhausted.

He touched a hand to his chest plate. "I think so. I could leave if you like," he took that same hand and tossed his thumb over his shoulder with a small grin. He didn't fool her. He may be smiling, but his eyes were breaking her down to her cells it felt like.

She dropped her hands from the bag and with her arms still glowing, hugged herself. "No. It's okay. I just needed to be sure." Her hands gripped her upper arms tightly. The tingling in her fingers from the unspent biotics hummed across her shoulders and she relished the warmth. Her body was chilled in spite of the sweat seeping from her pores.

"Something wrong? Kaidan came to me as soon as they returned and said you snapped at them and then sent them back to the Normandy for doing a good job?" Even he sounded skeptical.

"That's not what happened," she sighed, grabbing up a towel and dabbing the sweat from her forehead. "They have all memorized the sims and have started treating it like a game. I demonstrated my point by... possibly throwing a tiny shockwave at Jack... and then asking how many of them had planned their strategies before they arrived." She dropped to sit on the foot of the bed, her biotics slowly fading as she balled the towel in her fist.

He moved from the doorway to join her. "I don't think any of them really understand the depth of our situation here," he reasoned. "To them, the war is over. We're fixing the relays, getting the universe right again... They haven't seen the extent of what Leviathan can do."

"They need to be ready, Garrus. Whether they understand or not, this isn't a game," she insisted.

"I am more aware of that than you think, Shepard. Leviathan may not be visiting me, but I'm seeing firsthand what it's capable of." His subharmonics eased into a low groan that conveyed all of his frustration at not being able to grab Leviathan by the throat and rip it apart piece by piece. She knew the feeling. Her biotics flared again in response. "Uh, is that intentional?" he asked, indicating her hands.

She dropped the towel and rubbed her palms together. "Sorry. I'm just a little emotional. Apparently destroying the punching bag didn't quite work out all my frustration."

He grinned. "Well there is a certain Turian who might have a solution to that particular problem..." he alluded, standing and offering her his hand. "Let's get you in a warm shower and wash away some of that tension, hmm?"

She half frowned and half smiled, taking his hand and letting him lead her towards the stairs. "Don't you have calibrations to calibrate, officer Vakarian?" she teased.

"Damn the calibrations," he purred.

"Oh, I love it when you talk rebellious," she teased, biting her lip.

When they hit the top of the stairs and he tugged her into him, turning to walk backwards, she fell gratefully into his arms. She slid her still glowing hands up his chest to find their way beneath his fringe where she tickled over the spot she knew would drive him wild. His subvocals exploded in pleasure. "Spirits, Shepard. That tingles," he hummed.

She hadn't even noticed that they had already made it into the bathroom. He reached around the door of the shower and turned the water on before grabbing her and spinning them so she was pressed against the wall. He pushed his body against hers while his hands found their way under the half shirt. Her own moan was cut short as his mouth found hers, his hands gripping the skin of her back hungrily. She pawed at his clothes, the ages of practice she'd had with the Turian garments slipping from her memories in her urgency. She lost all sense when he dipped his head and his teeth found her clavicle. "God damn it," she gasped as the sensation rippled down her spine and she cocked her head to give him more access. The bite had served as distraction as he worked his own clothes free. When her hands found his chest again, it was bare, all the glorious rough plates and smooth patches of his skin before her to touch. He jostled her hands away as he pulled her shirt over her head, but she immediately replaced them, sending a mild jolt of her power through her fingers to make him choke out a laugh.

"Why have we never tried this before?" he asked between the kisses he was laying on her skin.

"Who knew biotics could feel good..." she sighed relishing how her skin hummed wherever he touched, drawing the eezo in her blood to the surface.

He chuckled. "The asari have been keeping secrets."

"I am definitely... giving Liara a... good... talking to... when I see her..." Shepard panted as the rest of their clothes disappeared and he took control by gripping her up and bodily moving them beneath the scalding water of the shower. She couldn't help her snort of laughter as he roughly pushed her against the wall, lifting one of her legs and accidentally activated the soap dispenser.

Soap suds cascaded over them, mixing with the water of the shower and making the metal in his skin shimmer. She touched a hand to his face, her thumb tracing the shining skin of his cheek before she reached up to gently run her fingers over his fringe. He purred contentedly, his hand sliding from her knee up to her hip. She could feel him ready for her, pressed so closely to her but not quite where she needed. She ground her hips toward him and he helped her to hop up from her one leg to wrap her limbs around him. Braced against the wall, he fought against the water to slip inside.

After the fire between them as they worked each other up, the act was slow and passionate. Her emotionally charged biotics gradually petered out as he and his glistening skin became the only thing on her mind. When they finished, he took her loofah from the knob of the shower where it hung and lovingly washed the remaining sweat and frustration of the day from her skin. He stood behind her, returning the loofah to its place and his fingers found her hair. He gently massaged her scalp and it was like heaven as he expertly lathered her shampoo. She nearly whimpered when he stopped and rinsed the soap away then planted a soft kiss in the curve of her neck. She turned her head to glance at him. "You're so good to me."

He smiled at the praise as he turned off the water and handed her a towel. "Feel better?"

"Much," she agreed, her thoughts far from Leviathan as she dabbed the water from her skin. She wrapped the towel around her and moved to wipe the steam from the mirror. She immediately caught sight of the small shallow bite marks and smiled.

He caught her expression in the mirror and moved up behind her again. He rubbed his hands down her arms from her shoulders and leaned close to rest his chin on her opposite shoulder so their faces were nearly touching. "You know... Turians use a mark like that to identify whether a female has a mate."

"So it's like the engagement ring of your species?" she asked, turning her face slightly in his direction.

He hummed. "I guess you could say that. Over the years, the mark becomes a scar... though in your case, I think you heal a little too quickly for it to ever scar over. It's still damned sexy to see it though."

"Careful, Tiger. Keep talking like that and we'll need another shower," she said with a grin.

* * *

 

Since when had the Normandy become the center of political machinations? Shepard sat reclined in her seat around the small table in the meeting room outside the war room, her mind a million light-years from the task at hand. There was a data pad on the table in front of her and a pen in her hand as she 'took notes' on a small sheet of paper that she had brought with her. Admiral Hackett, Primarch Victus, Esheel the Salarian councilor, Wrex, Liara and Garrus were all cramped around the table deciding the fate of the universe and all she could concentrate on was the doodle in the corner of her notes. Why was she even here? She had pointed out to Hackett that she was no politician, nor was she in a state to be given the responsibility. She glanced up at the squabbling group of people around her and saw everyone's attention was on the task at hand. Everyone of course except Garrus whose eyes were narrowed and boring into her. She sighed and set her attention back on her doodle.

The Citadel was nearly fixed. With help from the Keepers, progress was quick. With that progress came the urgency to rebuild civilization. The big wigs were trying to figure out what was next for their races, but Shepard saw the negotiations as premature. They had gathered the closest thing they could to an authority for each race and Wrex had simply showed up, no doubt fed the information about the meeting by Liara. Voices around the table were raised and agitated. After a snide comment about Wrex from Esheel, Shepard slammed her pen down on the table and stood, her palms braced on the flat surface so she didn't punch someone. All eyes fell on her. "Enough," she growled. Garrus' muscles were tense, but his subvocals were carefully trained to silence, whereas the Primarch's were buzzing with frustration, unaware that she could read him like a book.

"If the Krogan is going to insist..." Esheel began in her high voice and Shepard's eyes snapped to her.

"I said enough." The statement was calm, but her insides were quivering. She was angry. She hadn't saved the galaxy so they could all go back to the same elitist bull that they had faced before. The Salarian pressed her lips together in a sneer and no more protests rang out. Shepard balled her fists, leaving them leaning on the table as she began to speak. "This meeting is a joke. I almost died saving all of your asses from the Reapers and you're bickering over a couple backwater planets. The fact is, councilor, that without Wrex's help, the Reapers might just have won. Give him the damned planets..." She held up a palm as the Salarian opened her mouth again to argue. "The rest of you. With all due respect, we should not even be discussing the fate of the galaxy until we can get the Citadel back where it belongs and every race can have a voice."

"Each council race is properly represented, here," Esheel protested. Victus' subvocals began to rumble.

"That's my point," Shepard said willfully. "How many races did it take to save this galaxy? There are four races in this room. Why weren't the Quarians invited? Hell, the Geth are lying dormant in an abandoned warehouse! Wrex is only here because Liara gave him the information... I'll be damned if I saved you all so you could go back to the short sighted blindness that allowed the Reapers to invade us in the first place." She snatched up her datapad and circled the table to the exit.

"Commander, please," Victus called after her.

"I'm sorry Primarch. I know you are as frustrated as I am, but I have more important things to deal with than how many planets the Krogan are allowed to populate." She turned on her heel and left the room.

Halfway to the elevator, she nearly collided with Brynn. "I'm sorry, Commander," she apologized, glancing at Shepard with heavy lidded eyes.

"No harm done," Shepard said with a smile. The woman looked exhausted. "What are you doing in the CIC anyhow?"

She bounced on the balls of her feet, rocking her baby in her arms. "Jake seems to like the galaxy map. It calms him down." With that, the bundle in her arms began to fuss. She calmly tried to quiet him, but he was having no parts of it.

His tiny fists were balled and punching angrily at the air as he cried. "May I?" Shepard asked, setting her datapad on a nearby console and holding her arms out. Brynn nodded and shifted Jake's weight. Shepard gently pulled him close to her and began slowly swaying her hips and calling a light barrier up with her biotics. "I know," she agreed as he howled. "Life is so frustrating." Jake looked up at her as she smiled down at him. He reached up and grabbed at her hair, tugging gently. His crying slowed as she lifted her hand to replace her hair with her fingers in his grip. As she rocked him, she heard a soft trilling behind her and turned her head to see Garrus watching with his arms crossed. His mandibles were slightly away from his face in a half smile.

"So is this the 'more important things you have to deal with'?" he teased as her own smile matched his.

She returned her glance to Jake who was making soft clucking sounds as he played with her fingers. Brynn was watching in amazement. "Babies are much easier to handle than politicians," she said in a singsong voice. "I'd take you over the council any day," she said touching a tip of her finger to his nose and making him giggle.

"You are a miracle worker, Commander. He's been howling his head off since the ship landed," Brynn said.

Without taking her eyes off the smiling infant she said, "He probably likes the feel of the inertial dampeners. He was born in space after all. Have Steve fly a circuit in the Kodiak if you can't get him to sleep."

"God, I'm so tired, I hadn't even thought of that," Brynn said with an exhausted sigh.

"His father might also be able to help," she suggested, holding up her hand as it glowed softly with her biotics. "It only takes a light touch."

She passed Jake back to Brynn as she saw his eyes beginning to close. When he settled back down, she removed her palm from his chest, taking her biotics with her. "Thank you, Commander."

Shepard waved her off, reigning in her biotics. "It was nothing."

She picked up her data pad and called the elevator. Garrus stepped up beside her as the door opened and they both stepped into the car. Once the doors closed, his eyes fell on her. "Where exactly did you learn all of that?"

She felt her cheeks flush pink. "I used to babysit a few of the neighbor's kids when I was a teenager."

He chuckled. "Well, I'm glad you know something about babies. The last infant I was around was Sol. I was barely 6 then."

She nudged him with her elbow. "Believe it or not, Vakarian, I was not always the bad ass soldier you see before you..." Her voice trailed off as the elevator reached her quarters. She sighed as she stepped out. "I just hope there is enough of me left after all of this..."

"Hey," he grabbed her arm, stopping her as she made her way across the hall to the doorway. "We're going to beat this thing. When we do, Liara can do her thing and you will be the fantastic mother that I know you can be."

She fell into the hug he offered, but she wasn't so sure that he was right. He had so much faith in her, but without him around, her mind wandered and Leviathan reared it's ugly head. "So what was the word after I left?" she asked, changing the subject and pulling away from him.

He sighed. "I think the politicians are threatened by how much influence your word has over the race leaders. Esheel is terrified to let the 'lesser races' have a seat on the council, but Victus and Wrex are of course in agreement. They think you're right."

"I am," she said. "Everyone who helped in this war deserves a voice."

"I know that, Shepard, but a lot of people are set in their ways around here. Victus stirred things up when he was named Primarch, but now that the war is over, a lot of Turians might not agree with his methods."

"This is why we should wait to have these stupid meetings until the actual governments are restored. Earth is suffering without it's leaders. All of the countries' officials were either indoctrinated or killed during the war. All we have is Hackett, and he is too... Alliance... to really officially represent the world. Liara may have been at the meeting, but she has no real say in the future of her people. Until we can get to Thessia and find a Matriarch or two, the Asari aren't properly represented... It's a mess." She sighed and dropped onto her couch, throwing the datapad down on the coffee table.

His subvocals tightened into a careful hum. "Hackett isn't the only voice humanity has, Shepard."

She glanced up at him, her elbows leaning on her knees. "You can't mean me. Garrus, I am in no state to be making galaxy wide decisions for humanity."

"Why not you? You told me that I would make a good councilor. If you can have that much faith in me, you should have even more in yourself." He sat down beside her, his blue eyes studying her face intently.

She leaned back into the couch and closed her eyes. "Will it ever end?"

He harrumphed and his mandibles clicked in annoyance. "Probably not."

She snorted. "Thanks for the pep talk."

* * *

 

Shepard stared at her computer screen. The messages coming in from around the galaxy were numerous. Some were thankful, others pleading, others threatening. She sighed and flipped the screen closed. She was alone in her cabin, listening to the humming of the aquarium VI that she had fixed days ago. Whenever she was alone, she made it a point to busy her hands to keep her mind focused. Garrus had been called away by Victus who had in the last few weeks begun to hoist a lot of responsibility onto his shoulders. Shepard could feel the question about being the new Turian councilor hovering in the air. Garrus was adamant that he was going to refuse if the Primarch asked again, but if the Citadel wasn't finished soon, they might not have that option. Even temporarily, Garrus was the right choice. She just wished he would see it.

On the other hand, after her outburst at the meeting, Hackett had given her some space. Not since she'd been made a SPECTRE had her inbox been so free of Alliance requests. Bored and twitchy, Shepard got up from the desk and made her way down to Liara's room. She knocked loudly and waited for an answer before barging in. She'd learned her lesson the previous week when she'd seen more of Javik than she'd ever wanted to. "Shepard. What brings you here?" Liara asked softly, glancing away from her screens to appraise Shepard.

"Do you happen to have the address for that warehouse where they've stored the Geth?" she asked hesitantly.

Liara smiled. "Of course. I'm actually surprised you haven't asked for it before now." Liara tapped a few buttons on her console and then swiped across the screen.

Shepard's omnitool trilled and she pulled up the message. "Thanks Liara."

She started to back out of the room and Liara cleared her throat. "Are you going alone?"

"I was thinking about it. Why?"

"Just be careful. We don't know if Leviathan has any of it's artifacts planted on Earth." Liara said, placing her hands in her lap away from the console she'd been tapping on.

Shepard felt a chill caress down her spine at the suggestion. "Right. Maybe I'll take Kaidan if he's not busy."

Liara's lips turned up in a smirk. "A wise choice, Shepard. Let me know if you need anything else." With that, she turned back to her console and her work.

Shepard crossed the mess and found her way to Starboard observation. She tapped on the door and heard a mumbled response from Kaidan, then the door hissed aside. She stepped in. "Hey, Kaidan. Up for a field trip?" she asked as he carefully earmarked the page he was reading from an actual paper book.

"Sure, Shepard. Where are we going?" he asked.

"I wanted to go meet with Admiral Xen and see if I could help with the Geth. Liara suggested I shouldn't go alone in case Leviathan has any artifacts lying around." She shrugged and crossed her arms over her chest.

"I'm no tech expert, Shepard, but without the Crucible, aren't the Geth pretty much down and out?" he asked.

She shrugged. "Doesn't mean I shouldn't try... Or at least see with my own eyes what I caused." Kaidan studied her intently, one brow slightly raised. She flinched under the scrutiny. "Alright, fine... It's the only thing I could think of that would occupy my mind."

He chuckled. "I've got a better idea. Come on." He stood and shooed her ahead of him to the elevator.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"It's a surprise, okay. I'm kidnapping you for the day," he said with a chuckle.

"Alright, I'm trusting you, Alenko... Lead on."

* * *

 

Shepard sat on the front of the boat, her toes grazing the cool waters of the English Bay. Summer in Vancouver was still a bit chilly, but the breeze over the water was nice. Kaidan approached her and dangled another beer in front of her. She took it and he sat down beside her, sipping from his own bottle. "This is nice," she said with a sigh.

"I spent so many summers on this boat with my dad," he said softly. She knew his father had been killed in the war when Earth was invaded and she allowed him a moment to take a deep breath and grieve a little. She picked silently at the label on her bottle. He swallowed audibly then said, "How are you doing, Shepard? Really..."

It was her turn to swallow. "Really? That changes by the hour. Depends on how frisky Leviathan is feeling."

"Well, forgive me if I'm out of line, but you look like shit," he said with a smirk.

She snorted. "Yeah, thanks." She took another swig of her beer.

Before he could say anything else, her omnitool chirped and vibrated. She lifted her arm to accept the vid call. Before she could say a word, Garrus' voice came urgently through the comm. "Shepard. You alright, where are you? My omnitool has you in the middle of the ocean."

She grinned at his concern. "I'm fine, Big Guy. I needed to occupy my mind, so Kaidan brought me out on his dad's boat. We're enjoying the weather and I'm probably growing a few more freckles."

"I promise, she's fine, Garrus," Kaidan added and she turned her wrist so he was in the vid frame too.

He hummed before responding. "I have news on the Citadel. The techs are saying that it should be finished within the week."

"Finally," she sighed, pulling her feet out of the water and standing to make her way aft of the boat for a small amount of privacy. "Hey, I've missed you."

His mandibles snuck away from his cheeks in a smile and she heard a faint purr. "Don't disappear on me, Shepard. I almost had a heart attack when you weren't on the Normandy. Then Liara said you had gone to the Geth warehouse, but Xen hadn't heard from you. I was ready to send out a search party."

She chuckled. "You can't get rid of me that easily... Have you heard from your family since QEC was re-established?"

"I sent dad a message, but I haven't heard anything. I'm thinking that wherever on Invictus they are, communication is still a little broken," he said, his voice not hinting any worry. He knew they were likely safe.

"As soon as the relays are fixed, we'll head straight there," she promised.

He made a huffing sound. "Yeah, if I can get out from under the Primarch's talons."

"It's not like he can force you into a position you don't want," she said with a sigh.

"No, but he can heap all of the work on me."

"He'll find someone else to bother once we make it back into Turian space," she said with more confidence than she felt. "Right now, you're all he has."

"We'll talk about it when you get back," he said.

She nodded. "I'll get Kaidan to bring us back to shore."

"Dinner tonight?" he asked.

"At the apartment," she agreed with a smile.

"See you then." His face disappeared as he ended the call.

* * *

 

Garrus fidgeted with his rifle scope while Shepard paced in small circles in front of the console where the tile that had lifted them into the Catalyst chamber sat nestled in the floor. She was mumbling to herself, but her focus was drawn to a point beside the console. Hours ago, the science team had officially announced that repairs to both the Citadel and the Crucible had been completed. They had suited up and begun the task of trying to figure out how to jump-start the crucible without overdoing the energy that was released and having to start all over again. Tali had made certain that her people had been warned of the potential for hard restarts in their suits when the Geth came back online, and Aria sat with her small fleet surrounding the Sol relay to report when it came back online. She had volunteered for the first jump out of the system, eager to be back on her piss-hole station.

He cleared his throat, drawing Shepard's attention back to him and Tali. The Quarian was bouncing on her toes in excitement. Shepard stopped pacing and said, "From what I understand, Tali, your program should work. The excess energy bleed will collect inside the Crucible and when it fires, it will kick-start the relay network and jump from relay to relay. All of the eezo not spent on the relays will be kicked to the Omega 4 relay and into the galactic core. That's the safest way to handle this."

"How do you plan to control the bleed?" Tali asked skeptically.

"It's in the Citadel's background processes," Shepard said as if they should have already known that.

Tali waved a hand. "If you say so."

Shepard turned away from them and he could see the determination in her shoulders as she pecked away at her omnitool, uploading the program to the console. "Come on, Shepard. I don't have all day," Aria's voice came irritated over the comms.

"Don't rush me, T'Loak!" Shepard barked.

Aria chuckled seductively over the earpiece. "I love it when you're feisty, Shepard. I almost wish that Turian hadn't snatched you up. We could have had a lot of fun together."

Garrus growled his own response before Shepard could say a word. Aria simply laughed again and went radio silent. "Alright, here goes nothing," Shepard said, her hand hovering over a blinking green button.

Her hand made contact with the console and a distinct humming sound resonated through the floor. He could feel the vibrations in his carapace as the relay energy built up to fire. "Uh, should we be standing this close?" he asked.

"It's fine," Shepard said, her voice shaky as she backed away from the console. The hum intensified, getting inside Garrus' head like Tali's combat drone was wont to do. He cringed, his mandibles inadvertently clamping against his face as his teeth gritted against the invasion. Shepard clapped her hands over her ears and Tali was fidgeting wildly with her omnitool, probably shutting off the auditory sensors in her suit. All at once, the noise subsided and a great rumble shook the Citadel. Garrus nearly lost his balance as the Crucible fired. When silence fell and all he could hear was the breathing of his companions, Garrus sighed. Shepard chuckled breathily. "Well, at least it didn't blow up in my face this time." Then she touched her fingers to her ear where her comm was nestled. "Hey Aria. What have we got?"

The connection was fuzzy as Aria spoke loudly. "When the energy hit the relay it was like a giant fucking EMP went off. A few of our ships went down, but nothing too serious. The relay is spinning again."

Shepard looked hopeful. "Are you still going to go through?"

"Of course I am. I just need to get those few ships back online," Aria grumbled.

"It might be a good idea to jump one system at a time so we can be sure that the beam reaches Omega before you do," Shepard warned.

"I despise it when you're right," Aria growled.

"Good luck. Keep me posted." Shepard dropped her hand and grinned at Tali. "Looks like your program worked."

"On this relay," Tali agreed, her hands wringing nervously. "Hopefully the energy spreads."

"It will," Shepard said with confidence in her voice. "Let's get back to the Normandy and give Aria some time to make a few jumps. Then we can work on carting the Citadel back to Widow.

Tali's omnitool chirped and she lifted her arm to read her messages. "Keelah. It's Xen. She says the Geth are coming back online."

"Do they seem alright?" Shepard asked.

"They seem 'a bit confused, but otherwise functional', are her exact words," Tali quoted.

Garrus saw Shepard's shoulders slump in what he assumed was relief. He knew that the fate of the Geth had been weighing heavily on her conscience. He purred his reassurance as she cracked a small smile. "One crisis averted," Shepard said.

* * *

 

Garrus was starting to lose count of the number of times he had walked in on Shepard talking to herself in the last few months. Likely, it wasn't herself she was talking to, but Leviathan. She'd told him that being alone was when it was the worst, so he did his best to keep her company, but Victus was becoming more and more insistent on taking up a lot of his time. Now that they were finally on the move, the Citadel tethered to the Normandy, the Primarch couldn't call him away. Aria had apparently made it safely back to Omega and Garrus was more than glad to have her gone. He was grateful she had helped Shepard, but she was irritating.

Shepard had insisted that once the Citadel was back in place, that they would head straight for Invictus. As much as he wanted to see his family, he was wondering how long she was going to delay the trip to Despoina to take care of her own problem. He wanted his mate back. He'd noticed her zoning out in rooms full of people and her heart just wasn't in the teasing jabs that she tried to throw at others. Not like it used to be. She was sad and distant and it was hurting him to see her this way.

He was sitting in their cabin, reading the Wonderland story she'd gotten him into while she sat at her little table and fiddled idly with a broken piece of tech that was the distraction of the day. He could barely concentrate on his book as he snuck glances at her every few minutes to be sure she was still with him. He hated to push the issue, but he couldn't sit by anymore and watch her go through this. He sighed and set the datapad down on the coffee table. When she heard it clatter, she startled, dropping the tiny screw driver she'd been using. She turned to glare at him and he cocked his head. "We need to start planning on how we're going to get rid of Leviathan," he said bluntly.

It was her turn to sigh. Her shoulders slumped, the annoyance at his interruption slipping from her body. Her scent wafted across the room as she shifted in her chair to face him. "In all due honesty, Big Guy, I'm not sure I should even have a say in that particular mission."

"Why the hell not?" he asked, agitated, not with her, but with the whole situation.

"Think about it, Garrus." She stood from her seat, tossing the still broken bit of metal and circuits onto the table so she could make her way over to him. She sat across from his chair on the couch and her arms and legs crossed. Her defensive posture. "Leviathan is inside my head. If I start planning how to take it down, it's going to know our every move before we even make it."

"But you can block it out. I've seen you do it," he reasoned.

"For a little bit, sure, but I don't know for how long," she said with another deep sigh. She sat forward, her elbows landing on her knees and her face fell into her palms. "I never should have hunted it down," she said, her voice mumbled.

He clicked his mandibles. "You did what you thought was right. At the time, it was."

"How many times has what I thought was right gotten us into an even bigger mess than the one we were already handling?" she asked, her eyes finally meeting his and pleading for an answer.

He couldn't help but chuckle. Her eyes narrowed but he just smiled at her. "By my count, Shepard, this is the only time."

"So the shit storm that has been all the missions we've been on in the last few years?" she asked. She was leaning forward, her shoulders slumped and he took in the dark rings under her eyes and the light line of orange along her jaw line. Was she truly stressing so badly to bring her scars back?

"Last I checked, Shepard, those shit storm missions led to saving the galaxy. I don't know about you, but I call that an acceptable compromise," he said standing to join her on the couch and tracing a gentle talon down the shining scar. "You need to stop stressing about this and we need to do something about it." He took a ragged sigh as her bright green eyes stared holes in him. "before I lose you."

Her lips pressed together in a line and she looked away her hair falling over her face. He tucked the strands behind her ear so he could watch her profile. Small lines formed at the corner of her eyes as her expression pinched. "The truth is, Garrus, I just don't know what to do. I've never been at a loss before. I've always had some semblance of a plan, even if it didn't always work out. There are so many unknowns with Leviathan..." her fingers played with each other nervously between her knees.

He hummed as he set his own brain on the problem at hand, reaching out to still her restless hands. "You say we know nothing, Shepard, but you're forgetting something. You are on speaking terms with the only entity in the Universe who might have information on the bastards."

Her head snapped around, her eyes wide as she gaped at him. It was her 'why didn't I think of that?' expression. "Garrus... You're a genius!" Her face lit up in a grin as she flung herself at him. The expression alone was a breakthrough. He hadn't seen her smile genuinely in at least a week. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close as he breathed in her scent. As long as she still smelled like Shepard, he hadn't lost her yet.

* * *

 

The Normandy jostled as the tether to the Citadel released, leaving the massive space station hovering in it's old place among the stars and clouds of the Widow system. It looked a bit strange with the Crucible still attached to the Presidium, but it was home where it belonged. Shepard stared out the small observation window at the rear of the cargo bay, her armor already in place, as the tether reeled back into the Normandy. A few other ships slowly followed them through the relay and began to dock at the Citadel. She was jarred from her thoughts as Garrus cleared his throat behind her. "You ready to go, Shepard?"

She turned to regard him. Since they'd left the Sol system, he had kept a near constant vigil on her, watching for abnormalities. His concerns had finally come to a head a few days ago in their cabin as he confronted her. His idea had been a good one, but she still couldn't help feeling nervous. Her hands were trembling as she nodded. "Let's get this over with."

He led her to the shuttle, a hand comfortingly resting on her back. "You know, if this works, we could be mere days away from freedom," he said optimistically as his subharmonics betrayed his own nerves.

"Nothing ever just works for us, Big Guy. You should know that," she said teasingly, the tone of her voice not exactly as teasing as she had hoped. It was becoming harder and harder for her to cover up the decimation of her personality as Leviathan chipped away at her from the background.

Garrus' chest rumbled, letting her know he'd noticed. "It has to work," was all he said.

They situated themselves in the shuttle, him in the pilot's seat and her in the copilot's. He quietly took the controls, concentrating on the task at hand as she admired his profile in the dim lighting. Her fingers twisted the sapphire on her finger as she wished they could be heading to Invictus instead of back to the Citadel to talk to the Catalyst. She felt her forehead creasing in anger as she thought about the unfairness of it all.

She hadn't noticed that she had yet again recoiled into her own thoughts until she heard her name. "Shepard!"

"Hm?" She looked back at him, her eyes refocusing.

"I said, you're going to twist that thing off if you keep fiddling with it," he said with a forced smile. "Also, you have angry face."

"Did I?" she asked, knowing it sounded vapid. She sighed. "I'm sorry."

He shrugged, his eyes falling back on the passing stars ahead as they coasted toward the Citadel. "Frankly, I'm used to it by now."

Rage bubbled in her chest and she slammed a fist down on the console in front of her, making the shuttle beep it's annoyance. His subharmonics complained right along with it as she gritted her teeth, pulling her fist to her chest to avoid punching the console again. He flicked his talons over a few buttons, silencing the alarms and glared at her. "I'm sorry," she said again. "I just hate that you should have to get used to something like that... It's not fair." The last she said barely above a whisper, her voice choking in her throat.

A soft keening skipped through his throat that he quickly silenced when she looked up to meet his eyes. "Let's just get this done,okay?" he pleaded.

She nodded quickly as he carefully closed off his subharmonics and shut her effectively off from his thoughts. They rode the rest of the way in silence and in minutes were touching down on the rounded floor of the console chamber. Shepard looked out the windows of the shuttle and saw the child waiting for her. It waved invitingly and she felt herself smile as she stood and pushed the hatch open. Garrus followed, but not on her heels. Somehow, he knew she needed her space. She approached the boy, his hands stuffed in his hoodie pockets as he returned her grin. "Hey," she said softly kneeling to get eye level with the yellowish glow.

"I've been waiting for you to reach the conclusion to come to me," he said matter-of-factly, cocking his head. "I am surprised it took you so long."

She tapped her temple with a finger. "It's been a little busy up here," she admitted. Then she rested her forearms on the knee not on the floor. "Can you help?"

He looked her over, his eyes slowly slipping up and down her, evaluating the situation. "I believe so. What you need is protection from influence. As I did before, I may be able to give a small piece of myself to you..."

"But won't that make a mess of everything we've fixed already?" she asked, shaking her head, a wash of more nerves forming a new layer on top of the old.

A small chuckle surprised her as it fell from the boy's mouth. "No. It will not be all of me as it was before. Just a small piece. Like the small piece of you that you have given to me. You have given me understanding so in return, I will give you protection and an opportunity." He reached out, two fingers touching her forehead and she gasped as she felt the raw energy flow into her and settle in her gut as if it belonged there. "Use this gift wisely, Shepard. It will not last forever. You will need to destroy Leviathan before it can get back in."

She glanced up at the boy, the smile still on his face, and her heart fluttered excitedly. For the first time in ages, she felt alone, at peace. "Thank you," she sighed as her shoulders relaxed. She reached out and was reminded of her dream in the forest as she hugged the invisible creature. It must have looked strange to anyone other than her, and she chuckled around happy tears as she pulled away to glance back at Garrus.

"Go to him," the boy said softly. "And remember what I said."

She stood and turned to walk swiftly back to Garrus. He stood beside the shuttle, his head cocked as if he were afraid to hope. She broke into a run half way to him and laughed out loud, throwing herself into his arms. "We have a chance!" she giggled, burying her face in his cowl as he stumbled, catching the unexpected weight.

"Shepard?" he said questioningly, pulling his head back to look into her eyes. His own expression was one of shock at her seemingly bipolar change in mood.

"I'll explain on the way back to the Normandy," she said excitedly, wriggling from his grasp and putting her feet back down on the floor. "Come on, we're on a time limit." She rushed into the shuttle, dropping into the pilot's chair and starting the engines. She heard the hatch close behind him and his heavy footsteps as he moved to sit beside her. She stuck her tongue between her teeth as she piloted the shuttle around to zip towards the Normandy. "So..."

Her voice was cut off as she heard the cautious rumbling coming from his chest. "What just happened, Shepard?"

She turned her head to grin at him. "Well, if you would let me finish, I could tell you," she said, playfully backhanding his chest. "So... the Catalyst was actually waiting for me when we showed up. It already knew what I wanted. He gave me a small layer of protection from Leviathan, and a chance. He gave me a small piece if him in exchange for the small piece of humanity that I slipped him when I got him home. A chance, Garrus!" she said pointedly. He was still staring at her when she finished her rambling, his subvocals a jumble of excitement, fear and a little bit of caution, mixed with his happiness. "Oh, come on!" she groaned, rolling her eyes as his brow plates furrowed. "This was your idea!"

"I guess I'm just a little thrown. I thought we were going for information, not... whatever it is we got," he said, his subvocals calming down as he ran fingers through his fringe. He sighed and finally looked back up at her with a smile. "So we have a chance?"

She nodded emphatically as they reached the Normandy and she easily slid the Kodiak into it's dock. "We need to do this fast. He said that it wouldn't last forever, so we needed to destroy Leviathan before it could get back in. But for now, it's banished and I can think again." She got up from her seat and took the few steps into his space, pushing her legs between his. "When this is all over, we have some serious catching up to do." She leaned over, putting her face next to his. "I know I've been really hard to deal with lately, but I promise, Big Guy, that's changing."

The seat leaned back and a purr started in his chest as she fell into his lap. "Look, the real Commander Shepard. I thought that was an extinct species."

She snorted, "You and me both. I was starting to hate my own skin."

He rubbed his cheek against hers, still purring. "I still love your skin."

"Well, maybe after we get Joker on the move, and get everyone's minds on the problem, you can show me how much..." she hinted, realizing that it had been over a week since they had done anything more intimate than sleeping beside each other.

His hands gripped her more tightly and he chuckled painfully, "Spirits, I've missed you."

She regretfully climbed from his lap. "Easy, Big Guy. I don't think Steve would appreciate us soiling his shuttle." She sauntered away from him, her heart light with hope.

* * *

 

Everyone talked at once as they sat around the small table in the conference room. Much like the last meeting held there, Shepard had a small notepad in her hands, and Garrus was staring her down. Only this time, she was not lost in thought or annoyed, she was listening, rather intently to the ideas being thrown around the room. "Can't we just take a small team in the Kodiak and drop some rockets on the bastards?" James asked.

"No good," Steve retorted. "Last time we went there, that pulse knocked us right out of the sky."

"But the stealth systems..." Jack offered.

"Had zero effect," Kaidan sighed, his fingers rubbing his forehead.

"Because we weren't using them," Shepard added, drawing all eyes to her. She sighed as Kaiden's brow rose and he glanced at Steve who shook his head. "Sure you may have had them activated, but we were scanning the probe. Heat emissions mean nothing when you're actively throwing scans at a planet."

"Jesus," Steve cursed. "She's right. No wonder they saw us coming a mile away."

"I say we just blow up the planet," Javik added his opinion as Liara rolled her eyes beside him.

Shepard snorted, liking the idea, but she had to disagree. "There is not enough ordinance in the universe to blow up a water world."

Javik shrugged and blinked his four eyes as James chuckled. "I'm bringing my surfboard for the waves."

Shepard held up a hand, smirking. "All right guys, simmer down."

"How much time do we have, Shepard?" Tali asked sheepishly.

Shepard shrugged. "If I'm honest, I really don't know. The kid made it seem like we were in a rush." The Quarian sat back in her seat, her hands wringing in her lap. "Do you have an idea, Tali?"

"If we could cart the relay from Skepsis..." She paused and sighed, shaking her head.

Shepard sat forward in excitement, but then as she thought about it, she understood Tali's reservations. Her excitement dwindled and she sighed too. "No you're right, Tali. It's a good idea, but the colonies in Skepsis need that relay."

"I know," Tali grumbled.

Jack wrinkled her nose and her brow scrunched. "So what we really need is a nova large enough to nuke a planet?"

"Essentially," Shepard said with a chuckle.

The room went silent as everyone ran out of ideas. Then Jacob added his voice to the floor. "Shepard, you've spent the most time with it, what does it want?"

"To kill me?" she shrugged, but before anyone could respond, her eyes narrowed and she sat straighter as she remembered something it had said to her back on the Citadel. "It wants to control the Intelligence. It wanted to know how I had accomplished it."

"But you don't 'control' it," Tali pointed out, her words laced in a question. "Do you?"

Shepard shook her head. "No. He's his own entity, like a Geth or EDI. They created him and he evolved. Now they're pissed because they don't own him anymore."

"Why _does_ he only show himself to you, Lola?" James asked slowly.

She shrugged. "Right place, right time. I was there. 'The first organic ever'. We saved each other." She had no explanation for them. The catalyst liked her. She had succeeded after millennia of him waiting for someone to reach him.

"We all know Shepard has a way of gaining the loyalty of everyone she touches," EDI said helpfully. "Perhaps it is simply that."

Shepard held up her hand and raised her brows indicating EDI. "Yes, that, maybe... Hell, I don't know. Whatever the reason, he's done nothing but help since the Crucible was fired. I'm inclined to be trusting."

"Well if he's so goddamned helpful, why can't he tell us how to go about finishing off this fucking mess?" Zaeed asked, reclining in his chair to slam his boots on the table, his fingers laced over his stomach.

Miranda sneered at his display as she sat primly in her chair, her hands folded on the table like a school girl. "Perhaps he believes we already have the answer."

Seeing that the meeting was getting her nothing but squabbles and sideways glances, Shepard stood and flattened her palms on the table. "All right guys. Everyone keep thinking. We have a few weeks before we reach Psi Tophet anyhow, and I'm open to any and all ideas. Dismissed." The crowd dwindled around them as Garrus' eyes still bored into her. She turned to regard him as he played cool Garrus. "Is there something you had to add?" she asked sarcastically.

"No," he held up his hands in placation.

"Then why are you hiding?" she asked, allowing the hurt into her voice.

He chuffed and stood to round the table to her. "I'm not hiding." He gathered her up in his arms and hugged her closely, allowing his subharmnics to freely resonate now that they were alone. "I'm not hiding," he repeated. "I'm just nervous. I didn't want to distract you, and I was staring because I haven't seen the real you in so long, that I'm honestly just trying to drink it in."

She pushed away from him and grinned. Then she danced in a circle. "Well, here I am, Big Guy, and I believe you promised me a night."

"I did, didn't I?" he purred, pulling her back to him for a chaste kiss before they headed up to the cabin.

* * *

 

Shepard was Shepard, but she was not fully Shepard. Garrus laid beside her, watching her sleep as the stars outside her picture window flashed past at FTL. She was no longer talking to Leviathan, or zoning out, but something was off. He couldn't put his talon on what was wrong, but it was bothering him nonetheless. After the meeting with the others, she had brought him back to their room and they had gone a few rounds before she had curled up beside him, leaving him feeling alone in spite of her presence right beside him. He could see her, feel her, smell her, but it was not the comforting presence he was used to. There had been something in her touch, like she was distracted.

A soft chirping drew him from his thoughts as her omnitool lit up on her nightstand. She shifted, her muscles tensing as the noise woke her. "For pity's sake who is that?" As she reached for the offending bracelet, to slip it on her wrist, she rolled onto her back and smiled up at him before activating the flashing call. He returned the gesture, but her frown said it didn't reach his eyes as he had meant it to. "You okay?" she asked softly.

He nodded and dipped his forehead to touch hers. "Answer your call."

She kept one eye on him as she answered the call, adjusting the sheets so she was covered. "Hello?"

"Shepard! I'm sorry if I woke you, but I think I solved your problem," The voice on the other end of the call was familiar, but the face was not.

"What's on your mind, Tali?" Shepard asked as if the striking face on the other end of the vid was a normal occurrence.

He grabbed her wrist and turned it so he could get a better look. Her skin was pale, a purplish hue to her features that blended nicely with her dark black hair. Her eyes shone like they always did through her helmet, but now he could see the definition of her soft features. Thin markings trailed over her forehead, chin and neck, but did not distract from her prettiness. "Tali?" he asked in shock as he saw her mask-less for the first time.

"Oh, hey Garrus," she said, her face flushing as a shock of black hair fell over her features.

"Your mask..." he sputtered as Shepard giggled at his expression.

"I've been sleeping recently in the open air," she said by way of explanation. "It is all sanctioned by Dr, Chakwas of course, but the Geth in my suit has boosted my immune system to where it's safe enough." Her shoulder shrugged high enough to show that she was wearing a t shirt much like one that Shepard might wear around casually, but it was much too big for her, falling off her shoulder when she moved.

He caught himself staring as Shepard giggled some more. "So you had an idea, Tali?" she asked, drawing the Quarian's attention back to her.

"Oh, right. So I was getting ready to lay down and it occurred to me. We could use the Geth Consensus..." she said excitedly, the flush in her cheeks fading as she was caught up in her explanation. "If we plug you in like Legion did before, we could download your mind into a spare platform, temporarily, and send it, you, down into the water with a rigged Kodiak. Physically, you'd be fine, safe in the pod, while you took out Leviathan."

Shepard glanced at him and he reached down to lift her sheet back up as she neglected her modesty in her own excitement. "I like what I'm hearing so far, Tali. Is there a downside?" Shepard asked.

"Well, there is always the chance that we won't be able to get you back after the download," Tali said, biting her lip and flicking her eyes away from the screen.

"You've got to be kidding," Garrus grumbled, immediately hating the idea. He felt the growl in his chest even as Shepard reacted to it, flinching at Tali's words.

"What are the odds?" Shepard asked, likely already calculating in her own head.

"I am 85 percent sure I can get you back. Since you've been in the consensus before, I will give you an extra two percent certainty," Tali said with a shrug, her confidence fading slightly as she made a face like she was possibly doing more of her own calculations. Her expressions, along with her features were so human that he was finding it easy to read her, even after all the years he'd spoken to her through her suit.

"Not good enough," Garrus, said, shaking his head. This was almost as bad as the idea to send Shepard down in the diving mech. Every time she left his side or he let her do something alone, it never failed to nearly kill her.

Shepard stopped him as she reached up with her free hand and cupped his mandible. "It's a shot we didn't have before," she said pleadingly.

As she gazed up at him with those green eyes, his own eyes flicked back to Tali who was watching the exchange with interest. "Can we get back to you in the morning, Tali?"

The Quarian's head bobbed in a nod. "Of course. Take your time." She ended the call and Shepard rolled from her back to face him, propped on her elbow. She was ready to listen, to discuss everything and all he wanted to do was shout 'no'.

"I don't like this, Shepard," he protested, as a fearful keen started up in his chest that he didn't have the strength to stifle.

Her free hand came to rest over his chest and a sad look fell over her features. "I know. I don't like it either," At least she had the sense to be doubtful. "but this might be our only chance. It's a good idea, and I trust Tali. We can't move on with our lives until this is done." Her fingernails tapped on his carapace, but she refused to look at him, instead, studying the chipped polish that she had picked away at during one of her particularly agitated days.

He hung his head, knowing she was right and her forehead found his. The Turian display of affection that she had adopted made all the worries he had felt earlier in the evening flutter away as she reached to pull his head closer, her warm palm on the back of his neck. "I want nothing more... but dammit Shepard, if I lose you to this, you had better not sick Kaidan on me again."

She snorted after a brisk inhale of breath that made him open his eyes and look at her. She was crying. He pulled her into him, her shuddering form pressing desperately against him. "I don't intend on dying to this bastard," she said, more softly than he thought he had ever heard her voice.

"And I won't let that happen," he agreed. How could he have ever thought something was wrong? She had gone to the Catalyst on his idea, she was back to mostly her old self, and he was looking for things to poke at. Of course she was distracted. The oldest slavers in the galaxy were gunning for her and they were getting inside her head to do it. After a few moments, he cleared his throat and said, "So Tali without a mask. I take it you've seen it before?"

She pulled away, biting her own lip as she brushed a few tears from her cheeks. Then she held up two fingers. "Twice... before tonight."

"Well, I feel left out," he grunted jokingly, rolling to his back.

"I told her on Rannoch that you would be jealous," Shepard teased.

 


	44. Breaching the Darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will Tali's insane plan work?

They were a day's flight away from Despoina. The brain trust, as Jacob called them, had been hard at work for weeks, building a suitable pod that would be capable of downloading her consciousness into an unused Geth platform. The empty platform had arrived in the system before them having been skipped like a rock from Sol, bypassing the detour to Widow that they had taken to drop off the Citadel. It was accompanied by another Quarian who happily lent her expertise to the efforts, informing Shepard that she had helped her out a while back on the Citadel when a volus had accused her of stealing his credit chit. Lia was a quiet girl, but she had a lot of knowledge.

Lia, Tali, EDI, Traynor and Brynn all had their heads together in the War room which they had converted into a makeshift data lab. Shepard watched from the sidelines, a tech expert herself, but they were working with things that she had never even dreamed possible, so she kept her nose out of it. "Nervous?" Jacob asked, startling her as he came up behind her. He chuckled. "I guess that answers my question."

She reached over and took little Jake from his arms and calmly cooed at him. The boy loved her hair and he reached up and grabbed for it as he usually did, giggling softly as he tugged so hard her head tipped to the side. She gently pulled it from his grasp and offered him her dog tags in return as her hips started to sway, she returned her gaze to the women in charge of her fate. "I'm surprised you decided to stay on after we fixed everything." she said to him.

He scoffed. "Ahh, Brynn loves the work. Stimulates the mind, she says. Where she goes, I go. Plus, I respect you Shepard. I'll help you see this through. You're stuck with us for now."

"That means a lot, Jacob," she said smiling as she touched a finger to Jake's nose as he tried to put her tags in his mouth. "Nuh uh," she scolded sweetly. She glanced back at Jacob who was yawning and rubbing his eyes. "You look like you could use a break. Do you want me to take him for a few hours? I don't mind."

"I don't wanna impose," he said, the look on his face grateful.

"It's not imposing," she said as she again took the tags from his grasp, this time to tuck them away in her shirt. Jake immediately began to tug on her hair again. "I could honestly use the distraction. My chess partner is otherwise occupied." She tipped her head toward Traynor.

"If you really don't mind. You know where his things are..." Jacob said patting Shepard's shoulder. "Brynn has a schedule posted near his cot for feedings and naps..."

Shepard nodded and followed him toward the CIC where she then made for the elevator. "So what would you like to do today, Jake?" she asked, moving the baby to her hip so she could press the button for the crew deck. He cooed in response and she nodded. "You like to watch the stars? Cool. I'm not the biggest fan, but who am I to judge?" She got off the elevator and headed to grab Jake's things then she took him to observation, planning on imposing on Kaidan's space. When she found it empty, she shrugged and set Jake on the floor on top of a blanket. She sat across from him, kicking off her shoes and setting them aside before digging in his bag for some toys. Finding some blocks, she grinned, holding them up in her palms. "I'm willing to bet you credits that your daddy has never shown you this trick." She called on her biotics and the blocks slowly lifted into the air between them. Jake watched in awe his too large head wobbling as he maintained his seat while trying to follow the floating blocks. "Should we spell some words?" she asked softly as she concentrated on twisting the blocks around in the air and rearranging them so they spelled his name. "Jake," she said, smiling as he responded to his name, taking his eyes momentarily off the blocks. "Yeah, that's you," she said, poking his belly and making him giggle.

A soft humming from the doorway drew her attention and the blocks wavered in the air as she looked away for a second. Garrus stood there, his arms crossed and his mandibles pulled from his face in a grin. "Don't stop on my account."

She smiled as he stepped further in the room, letting the door close behind him. Jake looked up past the blocks to watch him approach and teetered onto his back. Shepard snorted, reaching over and helping him to sit back up. "Aww you made the baby fall," she teased, the tone in her voice one she hadn't known she was capable of. She tickled Jake again. "Did the big mean Turian make you fall over?" Jake squealed happily and rolled onto his side again as she used the distraction to set the blocks down in a pile to the side.

"I just blew him away with my awesomeness," Garrus said with a chuckle, dropping to sit beside her on the floor. "So I have to ask... why are you alone in observation with a baby?"

"Well, his mother is working and Jacob looked completely drained, so I offered to watch him for a few hours," she explained as Jake reached for one of the blocks to bang it on the floor.

"But don't these things have a schedule? Like a feeding time and nap time?" he asked.

She pulled her head back and grinned. "Someone's been researching."

He shrugged. "Well, we did have plans, and one way or another, this thing is going down soon. I wanted to be prepared... You know, in case things work out in our favor."

Shepard felt her heart flutter and she leaned in to touch her forehead to his. "They will, Big Guy. I promise. Before you know it, we'll be on our way to Invictus, and I'll get to impress Castis Vakarian with my complete lack of ability in the Turian kitchen," she chuckled.

He joined her chuckle with a snort. "Well, at least Sol will like you."

She playfully backhanded his chest as the door whooshed open and Kaidan stepped in. "Hey, Kaidan. Sorry I took over your space," she said apologetically.

She shook a small stuffed toy, making the balls inside rattle noisily and Jake grabbed for it, almost falling over again. Garrus helpfully held him aloft with his hand and Shepard watched as he skillfully swapped his hand for a teething ring. Kaidan made his way over and joined the circle. "Are you kidding, I love kids!"

Shepard cocked her brow at him. "You... love kids?" she said skeptically.

"Is that so hard to believe?" he asked with a chuckle as he held a hand out for Jake and the baby slapped his palm as he tried to grab for his fingers. "Haha Yeah, high five!" he said cheerfully. Having gotten a reaction, Jake again slapped his palm. "Yeah!" Kaidan repeated with a chuckle. "Have you done the biotic blocks yet?" Kaidan asked.

"That was the first thing we did," Shepard confirmed, offering her own palm for Jake. With a giggle, he slapped them both at once with both hands, then looked at Garrus. "I think he wants you to play too, Big Guy."

Garrus reached his hand out and Jake slapped it. Garrus chuckled. "He's a smart one."

Shepard snorted. "Well, you've met his mom, right?"

"So how'd you two get sitting duty?" Kaidan asked.

"Actually, Shepard volunteered. I just happened to walk in on her doing something adorable," Garrus admitted as Jake grabbed hold of his fingers. "I'm gonna need gloves that aren't covered in grease and oil," he mused softly with a glance at Shepard, pulling his hand away and again replacing it with a toy.

Shepard watched him as he carefully avoided letting Jake get hold of his ungloved talons. "It's okay, we'll just get rubber caps for your fingers," she joked.

When she glanced away from Garrus, she must have had a look on her face, because Kaidan was watching her intently with a curious look on his own face. "Am I... missing something?" he asked her. "I mean you two can't... not biologically... right?"

Garrus chuckled, the soft trilling in his throat she had come to recognize when they spoke of the future, surfacing. "I can't wait to hear you explain this one."

Shepard sighed. "No. We can't, not us... but Liara thinks she can, with us... it's complicated."

After frowning for a moment, Kaidan nodded. "Okay, so you two, and Liara are going to swap DNA, and then she's going to surrogate you an Asari daughter..." he chuckled. "Is anything you do normal, Shepard?"

"Evidently, no," she agreed with a shrug. "But it gives us a chance we wouldn't have on our own."

Garrus' arm slipped around her waist and she leaned into him. Before anything else was said, Garrus' omnitool chirped and he tightened his arm around her to read his wrist. She tried to make out the translation before he moved, but he said, "It's a message from Dad!"

She grabbed his arm. "Well, what does it say?" she asked eagerly. He'd been waiting patiently for weeks for a response from his family. She was starting to worry more than he was.

"I would read it if your hair wasn't in my face," he said nuzzling her head out of his way. She squinted as her translator worked double time trying to read the boxy Turian script. She reached her foot out as Jake almost fell over again and she righted him, wiggling her toes, with one eye still on the message. "Dad says that him and Sol made it back to Palaven. Her leg is doing fine and rebuilding is starting," he summarized.

"Well it's a good thing we didn't head for Invictus," she said, patting his leg. "You'll need to buy me some sunscreen if we're going to Palaven."

"SPF 3000. You're still red from the boat," Kaidan pointed out.

"Maybe a parasol," she amended with a grin.

"Okay, Morticia," Kaidan teased, summoning his own biotics to float the blocks for Jake.

Garrus chuckled. "Yeah, you'll be wearing an enviro suit, Shepard."

"But my implants..." she began.

"Don't make you impervious to radiation..." he finished.

She sighed in defeat. "I'm just glad they're okay."

* * *

 

They spent the afternoon entertaining Jake and around dinner time, Shepard sat down to eat with him in her lap. A few minutes into her meal, Brynn exited the elevator with Tali and Traynor and she rushed over to collect him. "I'm so sorry, Commander. I didn't know he was with you."

Shepard flapped her hand. "I volunteered. I'm going a little bit stir crazy while you all work on that pod. Jacob looked exhausted, so I offered some help."

Brynn smiled widely. "I don't think he's been sleeping very well. Jake is up a lot."

"Well, he should sleep pretty well tonight. He had three enthusiastic sitters who played him hard," she said with a grin.

"The good news is, we've finished the pod," Tali announced as she sat down beside Reegar who welcomed her with a gentle, playful tug on her hood. She shooed his hand with a giggle. Shepard took a moment to wonder if they had 'joined their suit environments', as Tali put it, before she spoke.

"Good," Shepard said, suddenly not as hungry as she had been moments before. She twirled her pasta around her fork, but didn't pick up the bite. "So when we reach Despoina tomorrow, we're all set..."

"I promise you, Commander, it's 93% safe," Traynor assured her.

"Ooh, my odds have risen, I see," Shepard said with a glance back at Tali who was no longer focused on her, but the man beside her. "Do I even want to know the math behind your estimate, Samantha?"

"Well, I took Tali's estimate and I broke your military record and your..." she stopped talking as everyone present stared at her. "And you really don't want to know how I got my numbers..."

"And this is why I never beat you at chess," Shepard sighed, casually sliding her barely touched dinner aside.

* * *

 

The Normandy sidled into orbit around Despoina, her stealth systems engaged. Shepard was already standing in front of the pod as it loomed over her. They had transported it and the geth hardware to the shuttle bay where the back up Kodiak had been packed with C4 and torpedos. Anything they could find that would be able to take down however many Leviathan that were lurking below the surface. Shepard had only seen three the last time and she was hoping that was the extent of the infestation. Miranda and Chakwas were both on standby to monitor the situation and Garrus was standing at her back. The brain trust huddled around, making some last minute checks on their system. "Are you sure you want to do this?" Garrus asked his face right beside hers.

She leaned back into him and his hands found her shoulders. "No, but it's our only option. This has to work." She was tired of finding new and unexciting ways of occupying her mind. She had been given a reprieve by the Catalyst, but when that wore off, she would be back to running. If this worked, things could go back to as normal as Shepard's life got on any given Tuesday. That was what she needed. Normal.

"I wish you didn't have to do this alone," he sighed, his subharmonics rumbling with what she interpreted as fear.

Her own stomach quivered, reminding her angrily that she had skipped breakfast due to her overwhelmed nerves, hungry, but twisting in knots. "I'll be back before you know it," she said with more confidence than she actually felt.

"Everything's ready," Lia announced. She bounced over to Shepard, showing her the datapad with the completed checklist of systems checks. Shepard had grown to like Lia in the last few weeks. She was sweet and bubbly and always willing to help. She had told Shepard that like Tali she had accepted a Geth into her suit to help with her immune system. Shepard glanced over the notes, not truly taking in any of the information and smiled at the turquoise hood that she had begun to identify as Lia. She shook off the label and tried to imagine what Lia might look like under her mask, drawing from what she knew of Tali. Then she smiled and nodded.

Shepard turned around and reached up to give Garrus a parting kiss before pulling away to step into the pod. His hand lingered in hers until the last second and she saluted him before settling into the semi padded pod. Tali closed the door over her and she glanced around, remembering how Legion had chided her previously for moving too much. She stood perfectly still after chuckling. "I couldn't even get a seat? Come on guys!"

The pod activated around her and she felt her breath coming faster as she had a small panic attack. She closed her eyes tightly, not interested in the scanning laser lights that were doing whatever it was that they did to get her consciousness from her body into the Geth consensus. A metallic rumble and vibration forced her eyes open and she was not in Kansas any more. "Welcome, Commander Shepard. My name is Rael. I am the Geth that resides in Tali'Zorah's enviro suit."

Shepard stepped from the pod, a little less disorientated than she had been the last time she had visited the consensus. "Rael, huh? Well I'm guessing you're here to lend a hand, so lead the way." Shepard wondered if the Geth had named itself or if Tali had intentionally called it after her father. Loosing him had been tough on the poor girl. Shepard remembered catching her crying a few times in the weeks following his death.

Rael had no body, but it directed her easily enough just as Legion had, with a series of catwalks that appeared as she walked. This hub was much less crowded than the one she had been in before, and there was a lot less Reaper code blocking her way. It was vast and her eyes wouldn't focus past a certain point in the distance. The only things she really saw were what she perceived as floating streams of data and clusters protected by thick gray walls that she was guessing was her visual interpretation of a firewall. The mind of machines was utterly confusing. She made her way to a large block of data that the geth politely asked her to step into. Once inside it, he warned of a slight tingle before she was to be downloaded into the Geth body waiting for her back on the Normandy. Inside the cluster was utterly pitch black, so she closed her eyes to keep from panicking. There was indeed a slight tingle in her toes and fingertips that radiated up her arms and legs to meet somewhere in the middle. Suddenly, she felt heavy and cumbersome, her arms leaden and her head like a bowling ball when she lifted it upwards. When she opened her eyes, she had a slight case of vertigo as she was looking at her self standing in the pod.

She blinked and tried to breathe, but remembered that synthetics don't breathe, so she spoke instead. "Who's brilliant idea was it to leave this here in front of that?"

She lifted her arm and in front of her was a three fingered metallic arm that pointed exactly as she had commanded. "Uh, Shepard?" She pulled the arm back to her, wiggling her fingers and reveling in the madness. She was in a Geth body!

She turned her head and saw Garrus looking at her, a frown on his face. "What?" she asked with a shrug. "Never seen a geth this sexy before?"

She placed a hand on her hip and cocked her head as his frown deepened. "Okay, I'm not the only one hearing her speak geth, right?" Garrus asked, pulling his eyes away from her to look at the others.

A lot of shaking heads made her shoulders slump. "So you can't understand me? Wonderful... That seems about par for the day."

She spun on her heel and headed for the shuttle, flapping her hand behind her dismissively. "That's definitely her though," Miranda said with a short chuckle. "I've never seen a Geth with so much sass."

Geth certainly had a problem with tunnel vision. Their flashlight eyes left them little to no peripheral vision. "No wonder they rebelled," she grunted, strapping herself into the pilot's seat and starting the Kodiak's engines. The hatch closed behind her and she carefully turned on the shuttle's stealth drive so Leviathan's pulse wouldn't knock her from the sky before she could even get to it. She switched on her comms even though no one could understand her and she said, "I hope you assholes are all having fun recording this so I can get a good laugh later."

She launched the shuttle and followed the navpoint programmed in from the probe's readings from the last time they were there, watching the Normandy get smaller and smaller in her rear cams. Like the last time, she kept a constant commentary, whether they could understand her or not. When she got near the water and no pulse hit her, she found herself trying to sigh in relief. "So far undetected. Engaging underwater specs, seals all reading normal. I'm going in," she said. Forcing the Kodiak's nose downwards, she gunned the engine and a splash of water met the windshield. As she was propelled downwards, she said, "Steve, you'll be happy to know that your Kodiak does indeed not leak. Summer beach parties here we come." She watched her pressure gauge rising, but it was not as critical a thing as the last time. Her body was safe. Geth couldn't drown. The Kodiak groaned under the pressure, but it held tight as she quickly approached the 3500m mark. "Not much further," she commented. "Here beastie, beastie..." Shepard caught a glimpse of the atlas she had ridden the last time, slowly decaying into rust in the water along a shelf of coral. She vaguely remembered it falling back into the water after she'd gotten out, but a lot of her ascent she had no recollection of. "God speed, soldier," she said, saluting the hunk of metal.

When things began to look familiar and she spotted the probe, she lessened her descent angle and leveled the Kodiak out so she could move forward slightly. She remembered Leviathan bubbling up from below the ledge before she had to drop any further, so she slowly inched toward the abyssal ledge and pointed the Kodiak downwards again to get a better look. Shining the lights down into the depths, at first, she saw nothing, but then she noticed the cluster of dark black Leviathan slightly to her right. Six spiny horns stuck up from the creatures and Shepard jumped in her seat when she realized what she was seeing. She quickly shone the light around, but from what she could tell, there were still only the three. She grinned in her mind's eye and then chuckled as she wondered what the devious look came out as on the geth's flashlight face. From what she could tell, she had come in on nap time. The three creatures were huddled in a tentacled mass of giant bodies. She needed to make every shot count before she detonated the C4 in their midst and pulled her mind out of the geth. She carefully lined up her targets on the screen before her and the geth body adjusted her aim for maximum efficiency. She hummed her appreciation and launched her first volley, The torpedoes shot from the Kodiak and each found it's target with precision. She re-targeted as the water around her erupted in a slew of guttural screams of rage and bubbles. These things had killed a Reaper, and she needed to remember that as she quickly sent her next volley. She piloted around them, shutting off her lights and using only her targeting computer as the second volley found it's marks. She had one more set of torpedoes and as she targeted again, it became harder to see as the blood from the creatures began to fill the water around them. The Kodiak was smashed to the side by a flailing tentacle and she fought to get it back under control, her computer screaming in protest. "Dammit," she cursed, shutting down the targeting computer and piloting closer again to visually aim. Once she had all three targets and the flailing had ceased, she slammed the button one final time. There were no cries of pain or outrage this time, only silence. Had she truly taken them down that easily? She slowly piloted into the midst of where the creatures had floated, her enhanced vision picking up nothing. They knew she was here, so she turned her lights back on and engaged her scanner to be certain. There were no readings to indicate life and the signal that Leviathan had emitted that had led them to it in the first place was nonexistent. As a precaution, Shepard prepared herself to get out of the geth body and back into the consensus while she set up the timer on the C4 detonator.

"You there, Rael?" she asked hopefully. "I've got about two minutes before this body is blown to several trillion bits." When there was not an immediate response, Shepard panicked. "Rael!?" she squeaked. Seconds ticked by agonizingly slowly and if she had fingernails, she would have been biting them. "Rael!" she demanded one final time.

At last, the geth responded. "Please remain still, Commander Shepard. I am extracting your consciousness."

A slight tingle in her fingers made her open her eyes and she realized she was back in the virtual world of the geth. She sighed in relief as the tingle receded and she shook her hands. "Damn, Rael. You've got some questionable timing."

"I apologize for any discomfort. If you could return to the pod, I will assist in placing you back in your appropriate hardware," he said.

Shepard sighed in relief. "Thanks."

* * *

 

Shepard had been gone for far too long and the noises coming from her comms were not at all encouraging. Garrus paced back and forth through the cargo bay running his hands through his fringe. "Hey, Scars. You mind? You're kinda making me nauseous," James said as his eyes followed.

"Shepard will be fine," Cortez assured him, casually resting against the remaining Kodiak. "She's been through much worse."

Before Garrus could answer around the lump growing in his throat, Shepard gasped in the pod and began pounding on the glass. He rushed over and Tali hit the release to open the door. Shepard fell out into his arms and he followed her to the floor as she gasped for air. Chakwas was at her side in seconds, grabbing her wrist to take a pulse reading. Shepard's eyes fluttered open and closed as he cradled her. Her bright green irises rolled into her skull. "What's happening?" he demanded.

"Lay her flat," Chakwas ordered. "Miranda, bring the crash kit."

Brynn joined the circle of doctors huddling around Shepard as she seized. Garrus felt his own heart stuttering in his chest. Tali was at his side and she was talking to him, but there was nothing he could hear except the irregular thumping of Shepard's heart in her chest. "Spirits, don't let her die," he whispered and he felt Tali's hand clutching his tightly.

As Chakwas ripped open her clothes, Garrus cringed, thankful that she had had the presence of mind not to wear her favorite hoodie. The seizing had stopped and Miranda clipped a small monitor to Shepard's finger as he heard the rapid thumping of her heart suddenly cease. "No pulse," Miranda called. "Juice her."

Chakwas turned a knob on her equipment and the others removed their hands from Shepard as she shouted, "Clear!"

Shepard's body jerked as the paddles touched her skin, leaving bright red marks of irritation and he heard a single beat from her heart before it went silent again. He was glad no one else could hear what was happening in his subvocals, because it was a mess. "No response," Brynn said.

Chakwas again called, "Clear!" and touched the paddles to her. Again she jerked and he heard three solid beats before her heart went silent again. After one final time, Chakwas dropped her hands in relief as Shepard's heart began to thump regularly. A sharp beeping of her monitor lent credence to his own ability to hear the gentle beating in her chest.

Tali leaned against him and sighed. "Keelah, that was close."

He wrapped an arm absently around the tiny Quarian as he watched the doctors moving Shepard onto a stretcher to take her up to the med bay. They were all jerked from their concerned fog by James' omnitool chirping urgently. "It's Ann," he said, glancing down at his wrist. He accepted the call and she began to talk rapidly. "Slow down, doc. We can't understand you."

"Sorry. I know Shepard was going to Despoina to do something about Leviathan, you told me as much. What just happened?" she asked, taking a deep breath.

"We don't really know," James said with a shrug. "Shepard did some crazy shit, almost died, and they're taking her upstairs to the med bay now."

"Whatever she did, I felt it. Leviathan is gone..." Ann said with relief. "Woke me from a dead sleep."

James looked up with a grin. "Thanks, Doc. I'll call you back later, okay. Things are a little loco around here."

"I look forward to it. And tell Shepard thanks." Ann hung up and Garrus moved with Tali toward the elevator. No way was he leaving Shepard alone.

"You go ahead, "Tali said, pulling her hand away. "We won't all fit."

Garrus slipped into an open space in the elevator and Chakwas sighed before Miranda pushed the button to take them up. The rest of the crew was waiting in the mess as they exited the elevator and headed for the med bay. Garrus was right behind them as they wheeled Shepard into the med bay until Miranda turned on him and placed a hand on his chest. "Outside until we stabilize her." He outright growled in her face and she leered back. "Don't challenge me Vakarian." Miranda's palms glowed blue and the threat was clear.

A hand landed on his shoulder and he spun to see Liara's concerned blue eyes staring up at him. "Garrus... let them help."

Miranda took the opportunity to close and lock the doors. "The fuck happened?" Jack demanded.

Garrus shrugged Liara's hand off his shoulder and moved to sit down at a table in the mess. His chest was tight, his mandibles quivering with the stress of the situation. Everyone gathered a safe distance around him and the elevator doors swished as Tali, EDI, Traynor and Cortez came around the wall to join them. "Shepard went into Cardiac arrest after exiting the consensus," EDI informed everyone who wasn't present to witness it.

Garrus' insides were quivering and he felt nauseous. Tali slipped into the chair next to him and took one of his shaking hands again. "She'll be fine," she soothed, her own voice choking slightly.

"Once it resumed, her heart rate was strong," EDI said by way of comfort, making him drop his head to the table. Even thinking about listening to Shepard die made his subvocals keen in despair. It was the third time he'd lost her. Spirits, he couldn't do it again. She would likely take him with her.

Everyone around him was discussing the situation and he tuned them out, staring at the med bay and trying to will the doors open. It felt like hours before it finally happened. He jerked up from his seat, jostling Tali's head from his shoulder and jogged to the med bay where Brynn was exiting. "Is she...?" He asked, his voice choked and breathless.

Brynn offered him a small smile. "She should be fine. They have her stable and they are running some tests. She asked for you."

Relief flooded his chest and he could breathe again. He'd never been in the room before when her heart had stopped. "Can I...?"

Brynn stepped out of his way and moved to talk with the others. He stepped up to the unlocked med bay door and allowed it to open to his presence. When he entered, the beeps and blips of the machines assaulted his hearing but underneath it all, he picked out her heartbeat, strong and steady. When his eyes settled on her, she was looking at him and smiling and her steady heartbeat sped. "Hey there, Big Guy."

She was propped up in the bed, Miranda and Chakwas had their heads pressed together and were taking scans with their omnitools. He skirted around the bed to the opposite side and Shepard's eyes followed him, wary. She was still smiling, but he could see her gauging his mood and what she should say next. Her arms were occupied with wires and tubes, so he reached out and began running his fingers through her soft hair. "So 93 percent, huh?"

A short sigh escaped her lips before she chuckled softly. "Shepard 3, death 0. At least Leviathan is gone. Crisis averted."

"Ann called just before they brought you up here. She seems to agree." He couldn't take his hand from her hair, but she didn't seem to mind. She closed her eyes the way she did whenever he played in her hair, a look of contentment gracing her features. It seemed like it had been forever since he'd seen that expression.

Chakwas wandered off to take her readings to her computer, and Miranda pulled out an extraction needle, aiming for Shepard's vein. Shepard hissed when Miranda pressed the needle through her skin. "Oh, come on, Miri. Really?" Her eyes were opened again and she was glaring at Miranda.

"I want to take every precaution. You're not leaving this bed until I'm convinced your heart isn't going to stop in your sleep," Miranda said, her eyes focused on her work and ignoring Shepard's icy glare.

"That won't actually happen, right?" Garrus asked feeling another fearful lump forming in his throat.

"I'm keeping her overnight, just in case," Miranda explained.

Shepard's head fell back onto the pillow behind her as she groaned, jostling his hand and mussing her hair forward so it fell in her face. He carefully pushed it back. "Why does saving the universe always end in a hospital stay?"

"Just shut up and let them work," he scolded her. "I heard your heart stop... three times, Shepard." She turned her glare on him, ready to be angry that he had scolded her until he quietly added the last, pulling his mandibles close to his face in his own unamused glare. Her mouth opened to gape at him and then she slowly closed it and reached up with her free arm to touch his face. When her hand made contact, he leaned into her touch and took in a ragged breath. "I swear mine almost stopped with it," he whispered.

"I'm sorry," she said simply, her thumb tracing his cheek over the faded paint of his clan markings. He was going to need to touch those up before going home. His eyes were closed but he heard her shift as she looked back at Miranda. "I'll stay as long as you want."

A short silence was followed by an impressed hum. "Who knew that was all I needed to get you to cooperate," Miranda said adjusting one of Shepard's wires and stepping away with her blood sample.

Once they were relatively alone, he pulled a nearby stool up to sit at her bedside, and continued to stroke her hair. "So we're done, right? Tell me we're done, Garrus." Her tone was pleading.

He shrugged. "Well, the only ancient evil we have left to face is Dad."

She snorted and her easy smile returned, slowing his own frightened heart. "Yeah, I think I'd rather take on the Reapers again."

Garrus' omnitool chirped and he frowned, glancing down to see who was sending him mail. "Dad," he said, intending to ignore it for the moment.

"Speak of the devil..." Shepard said in one of her earth turns of phrase. He didn't always understand them all, but he liked to learn. When he cocked his head in question, she smiled sweetly. "Speak of the devil and he's sure to appear," she quoted. "It means that if you're talking about someone, coincidence tells that they'll be the next person you see or hear from... So what does he have to say?"

Garrus hummed and grudgingly pulled his hand away from her hair, playfully flipping a few strands into her face before reading the short message. As she huffed and pushed it back, he summarized. "It seems that him and Sol have been called to the Citadel by the Primarch."

He glanced back up at his mate and she was worrying her lip between her teeth in a nervous expression. "Let's hope the Primarch knows how to keep his mouth shut."

"Victus wouldn't call Dad all of the way to the Citadel just to gossip about my relationships. He might try and convince Dad that I should be a councilor, but he's no... what is it you call it...?"

"Blabbermouth?" Shepard said with a grin.

"Yeah, that... I'll be the one who breaks the news. I guarantee it. At least you won't need an enviro suit," he said optimistically. Inside he was nervous. He knew Shepard could hear it in his subharmonics, but she simply smiled and threw her hands in the air.

"Yay," she said mockingly.

* * *

 

Shepard was released from the hospital after spending a single night cold and restless. As much as she appreciated the company, she had sent Garrus up to their cabin so at least one of them could get a good night's rest. As soon as he had left, she had contacted Joker and had him leave Despoina behind to head for the Citadel. With luck, they would reach the station before Garrus' father and she might be able to prepare herself to meet the man that in spite of their many disagreements, Garrus clearly looked up to.

When she stepped from the med bay with a clean bill of health, there was a cluster of people in the mess hall already hunting for breakfast. She was greeted with several smiles and Tali personally ran over and hugged her tightly. "I thought my machine broke you," she said with a nervous giggle.

"Nope. I'm good as new," she assured her friend, returning the tight hug. When she noticed Garrus missing, she frowned. "You seen Garrus, Tali?"

She shook her head, her helmet catching the light. "I think he's still upstairs."

"Thanks," she said, grabbing a couple of ration bars from the cabinet and heading for the elevator. After the swift ride up, she entered the cabin, glancing around. She didn't spot him right away so she called out. "Hello? I brought breakfast."

"Shepard! You're out!" His voice came from the bathroom and she stepped toward her desk to peer in the open door and shake the wrapped ration bars with mock excitement.

"Whatcha up to, Big Guy?" she asked seeing him standing in front of the mirror.

"Fixing this mess. If I show up in front of Dad with my markings looking like this, he'll disown me before I have a chance to even tell him about us," he explained, holding up a thin paint brush and a small compact full of paint.

She stepped up beside him with curiosity. She'd never seen this process before. She'd noticed the subtle changes each time he had touched up the paint, but she'd never seen him do it before. She had memorized his markings so long ago that if she ever saw him without them, she would likely not recognize him. They were as much a part of him as his scars had become. She bit her lip and shuffled her feet sheepishly. "Would you like a hand?" He glanced at her with a frown that was more quizzical than upset. "That's not too forward? Is this something private? I can go if you like..." she tossed her thumb over her shoulder and started to back away.

His expression changed from a frown to an excited grin. "Don't you dare." He reached out and grabbed her around the waist, pulling her back into him. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for you to think I was upset. It just surprised me. In our culture, only a Turian's mate is allowed to be a part of this."

"Then aren't we supposed to wait until after we're joined?" she asked with a coy grin.

He held up the brush between them, offering it to her. "I trust you."

She took the brush, stuffing the ration bars in her hoodie pocket. "We need better light. Come on."

She led him down to the couch and ran her finger over the light adjuster to brighten the room. They sat down, facing each other and she carefully adjusted her seating so she was stiff and still. She wanted to get this perfect. He hadn't gotten far on his own and she dipped the thin brush in the paint, scraping the excess off and touched the brush to his face where he had left off on his cheek. She carefully traced the outside of the geometrical shapes, glancing up into his eyes when she ran out of paint on the brush. They were sparkling with excitement and something deeper, his subharmonics trilling how much he loved her. She dipped the brush again and continued until she had made it all of the way across his face. Then she turned the brush to the side to fill in the outline she'd traced. The ritual was oddly soothing and she felt herself drifting in the moment, enjoying the memories of how they had gotten here, how they had earned each other's love and trust. When she pulled the brush away to get a bit more paint to start on his mandible, he spoke. "I love you."

It was barely a whisper, but she lifted her eyes from her task. "What's the occasion?"

She turned his chin with a finger to get a better angle to trace the upside down Y on his mandible. "You," he said, careful not to jostle her work by moving his mandible.

She couldn't help her smile as she continued to paint, listening to the happy trilling in his chest and softly humming along. It was better than music any day. When she finished, she sat back and admired her work. The fresh paint stood out vividly against the gray of his skin. "How long does it usually take to dry?" she asked softly, replacing the cap on the paint.

"Not long," he said sitting back in his seat to lean his head back and close his eyes.

"In that case, I will put on some coffee," she reached in her pocket and tossed his ration bar at him.

* * *

 

Joker slipped the Normandy into dock at the Citadel and Shepard danced excitedly in the airlock. She had a few days to prepare before Garrus' family arrived and she intended to pack as much learning into those days as she could. Garrus' hand fell on her shoulder and he chuckled. "Calm down, Shepard."

"Would you believe I'm nervous? I've looked a Reaper in the face while it was trying to kill me and my palms weren't sweating so badly," she complained. The airlock hissed open and she stepped out into a small crowd. Spotting Primarch Victus and the Salarian Councilor, Shepard stopped short and the word that dropped out of her mouth made Esheel cringe. "Fuuuck."

She hadn't meant to be rude, but it set the bar for how her stay on the Citadel was likely going to be. "Commander Shepard," Victus said, pretending she hadn't just dropped an F-bomb in his lap. "We'd heard you were returning and were hoping to take up a bit of your time... Vakarian," he said acknowledging Garrus.

Garrus nodded politely while Shepard glared at the Primarch. "Is there something earth shattering that you needed me for?"

The Primarch cocked his head and frowned. "As you know, Commander, many of the races around the galaxy suffered heavy losses in the war against the Reapers, Earth included. We need to get the council up and running again so that we might begin to rebuild. I've contacted the Asari and they are sending someone to represent their people. The Salarians have Esheel, I have already asked Garrus if he would step in to represent the Turians, but he has steadfastly refused me. I am asking you now, under several recommendations, to please accept my offer to become the official interim representative for Earth."

Shepard pressed her lips together and crossed her arms. "What exactly makes you think I would make a good councilor?" They had seen the offer coming months ago, but she was still no more eager to accept than Garrus was. Lobbying for humanity was a politician's job, not a soldier's. She hadn't even been born on Earth.

"Your record clearly sets you above any other candidate we might dig up. You were molded by this war to be the perfect politician. You negotiated peace between the Krogan, Salarians, and Turians as well as between the Quarians and Geth," he explained, a patient look on his face. His subharmonics were tightly reigned for the time being, likely on Garrus' account.

"Huh, nuh uh..." she shook her head. "I'm no politician. Sure, I understand people. I can bring them together to fight a war, but guess what, Primarch... there's no war on... And I'm still not going to be anyone's representative on a council that isn't giving equal rights to every race that fought and died against the Reapers. Your own planet wouldn't have survived without the Krogan, yet there was no mention in your pitch that told me if they were sending anyone to step in."

"Commander, please," Victus said, holding his hands up before him. "I am offering you a temporary position that will give you some sway in those very decisions."

"And your 'temporary' position isn't going to magically turn into 'oops we forgot to look for someone new'?" She shook her head again as Garrus stifled a chuckle both from his mouth and in his throat. "I'm not buying it." Shepard's eyes flicked to Esheel who was scowling through the entire conversation. Victus sighed, his subvocals finally rumbling in frustration, just as they had at the meeting on the Normandy. "Listen, Primarch. I understand you're under a lot of pressure," Shepard said, switching her own tone. She sympathized. She really did, but it was not her place. "From the looks of things, the Turians are the only race whose government hasn't completely crumbled in this war. Let's give everything some time. I will not accept a position as councilor, but I will do you a favor. I'll help coordinate relief efforts. The Normandy will personally deliver rations if we have to. I've already noted several places here on the Citadel that still had usable food and supplies. If you haven't found them already, I'll gladly get those nav points to you." She wasn't completely heartless. She knew the Primarch couldn't run the galaxy on his own, but he was right in the fact that things needed taking care of.

"The Keepers did the repairs, but the clean up has been very slow going," he agreed, his fresh sigh coming out as one of relief.

Shepard called up the nav points she and Garrus had recorded weeks ago and swiped them to the Primarch's omnitool. "That's all I have for you for now, but I have some personal business to attend to and I'd appreciate the chance to recover from my last mission."

"Recover?" Victus asked, his eyes flicking from the navpoints back to her.

Shepard shrugged. "I kind of died... again... It's a long story."

Before he could ask some more questions, she squeezed past him and Esheel and Garrus followed behind. She stuffed her hands in her hoodie pocket and grumbled to herself. "The Primarch is certainly persistent," Garrus commented, his subvocals relaxing back into place as they left the other Turian behind.

"He can shove his persistence," she grunted, rapidly pressing the elevator button in case he decided to follow them. "The council is a joke."

"It's how the galaxy has been run for centuries, Shepard. All these people... all they're doing is trying to grasp for something familiar. With the Citadel back, they're one step closer," he explained, his hand slowly rubbing up and down her back in an effort to relieve her obvious tension. She knew the set of her shoulders was giving her away. She attempted to alleviate the knot in her shoulders by rolling her head back and forth. As the elevator doors opened, they stepped in and he immediately began to massage the offending area.

She groaned and leaned into him. "There has got to be someone more suited to the job than me, Garrus. They're grasping." His subvocals said he disagreed, and she turned her head to glance at him. "You think they're right?" she asked in disbelief.

He chuckled. "I seem to recall you telling me the same thing a few months ago, Shepard."

She bit her lip. "I did, didn't I?" She paused and allowed his fingers to soothe her for a moment before continuing. "Do you ever think that us screaming 'I'm no politician' over and over again could be a case of 'the lady doth protest too much'?"

His hands paused and he hummed as he tried to work out her meaning. "Sorry, Shepard, you're going to have to translate that one for me."

She chuckled. "It's from Hamlet... a Shakespeare play. Basically it means that someone that denies something to an extreme is doing so to hide the truth."

He hummed again. "Did you just call me a politician?"

She snorted. "I said 'us'."

"Not helping your cause," he said dramatically. Then he sighed as the elevator doors opened onto the wards. A few people milled about, nothing near the masses that used to be present that you needed to pick your way through to get anywhere. "Let's just get through the next few days and see where we should go from there," he suggested as they moved through the streets toward her apartment.

The air was tense, like everyone who had returned was waiting for the other shoe to drop. In spite of Garrus' insistant comforting hum at her side, Shepard couldn't help but fall into the atmosphere. She wanted nothing more than to relax and be excited to get on with her life, but she couldn't. Something itched in the back of her mind telling her that after months of torment, ridding herself of Leviathan had been too easy. Sure, she had almost died to do it, but something felt off. Between the looming meeting with Garrus' father and the Primarch breathing down her neck, her adrenaline was coursing like she was in a firefight. She sighed and continued ahead past the still closed down casino.

"You know, Shepard, I can smell your stress," Garrus pointed out as he moved closer to her side.

She was spared having to answer him when she took note of a human and a Salarian flying Eclipse colors on their 'casual' clothes. The pair was standing a few feet down the alley behind the casino and she picked up on their whispered conversation. They apparently had friends not far away and they were all planning some looting. Shepard rolled her eyes and placed herself in the mercenaries' bubble. "Hey! Yeah, hi," she said with a bubbly grin as she cocked her head. The men backed away from her and scowled, one of them reaching for his waistband. "I wouldn't..." she said, shaking her head.

"Who the fuck are you?" the human asked, his scowl turning threatening, not cowed by her proximity as the Salarian was.

She pressed her lips together, impressed, and turned to Garrus to toss a thumb over her shoulder. "He doesn't know who I am."

"That's certainly a first," Garrus agreed, hovering at a safe distance behind her, his arms crossed. "Even Harbinger knew who you were."

The man's hand still lingered near what she guessed was a concealed pistol and she brought her biotics to the surface, her hands gently glowing blue under her crossed arms. "I don't care who you are, lady. What we do is none of your business."

Before she could return the snark, Garrus stepped forward. "Citadel Security," he said, dropping the title he'd shunned when he joined her the first time and then given up on after she'd died the first time.

In spite of him stepping on her toes, his choice of words made her thoughtful and she grinned. "I want you off this station, and if anything gets looted, I know exactly who to track down. I'm pretty sure Aria would be displeased that Eclipse is causing trouble here."

The man's eyes flicked between her and Garrus, realizing he was outmatched. His hand slowly fell from his waist and he elbowed his friend. "This ain't worth it."

They walked away and Garrus exchanged a glance with her. "People are unbelievable. Everyone is trying to clean up this mess, and they're here trying to profit." He growled in his chest and she smiled wider.

"I think I just killed two birds with one stone," she said, backhanding Garrus and heading back the way they had come to grab the shuttle from the Normandy.

"What are you up to, Shepard?" Garrus asked, jogging a few steps to catch her.

"Do you remember after we took down Saren and Sovereign? What was it that the broken Citadel needed more than anything? The thing that dragged you away from the Normandy..." she led as she took on a clipped half jog, half walk in her excitement.

He easily matched her speed at a simple walk and hummed guiltily as she brought up his leaving. "That would be C-Sec."

"How much are you willing to bet that C-Sec academy is as dark as the rest of the major organizations here?" She slammed her hand on the elevator button and turned to grace him with another grin. "If we can get C-Sec up and running again and get some normalcy back to the Citadel, maybe it will get the Primarch off our backs."

"And the other bird?" Garrus asked cocking his head in question as the elevator doors hissed open behind her.

She backed into the car and pulled him along with her. "I seem to remember you telling me once that your dad was a 'C-Sec man, through and through'. Maybe I'll get some points in my favor, even if I can't cook a lick of Turian cuisine," she said with a half snort.

 


	45. Remnants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard discovers something in C-Sec headquarters that she was not expecting.

The shuttle ride to C-Sec Headquarters was short. EDI, James, Liara and Kaidan had decided to come with them to lend a hand. As they all piled out onto the deserted streets in front of the building, James whistled. "Eerie," he said, adjusting his belt.

"At least it's not covered in Cerberus goons this time," Shepard said, using her visor to scan the area to be absolutely certain. She had elected to wear her armor, the added layer of protection making her feel less exposed in the empty, open area. There were still small bullet holes in some of the man built structures where the keepers had neglected to clean up. "Let's get inside and check out the situation."

It was strange to see that when people had started to rebuild the Citadel, they had congregated in the wards, neglecting the one building that was sadly quintessential to keeping the peace on the station. Shepard was forced to hack the outer lock on the door that Bailey had once let them in while bleeding during Udina's attempted coup. She was greeted with the acrid stench of death and she backed up a step before EDI nonchalantly moved through the door around her to begin scanning with her omnitool. "The Keepers were locked out of the structure and no tunnels led into the building. Anyone who died in here was simply left," she explained, a small pinch of disgust in her sultry voice.

Shepard inhaled a deep breath of fresh air before following the AI into the building. The air was still and stagnant, her movement stirring up the hovering odor of decay. She heard her companions all clipping on their helmets and she sighed without inhaling as best she could. "Always with the helmet, Shepard," Garrus purred through his mic regarding her through the tinted visor of his own protective head gear.

"Suppose you won't let me borrow yours this time, huh?" she said with a grin, feeling slightly better as she hoisted her pistol into her hands. Something about the building was making her skin crawl, and it wasn't just the smell.

"Does anyone else hear that humming?" Kaidan asked, drawing their attention.

"I thought it was just me," Shepard agreed, gritting her teeth as the sound penetrated her skin and seemingly vibrated the blood in her veins. It was an oddly familiar sensation, but she was finding it difficult to remember where she had felt it before.

"It's getting louder," Liara chimed in, scanning with her omnitool.

"I don't hear anything," Garrus said in surprise. It was rare that she heard something he couldn't.

"Nor I," EDI agreed, cocking her head.

"Must be a biotic thing," James offered with his own shrug.

"Let's see if we can track it down," Shepard suggested, starting off into the building. She was beginning to understand why no one had approached C-Sec Headquarters.

"I'm not sure I want to," Kaidan said with a grimace.

They moved as a group, EDI constantly scanning and her expression getting more and more disquiet as they went. "Shepard, I am receiving some scans that look similar to something we have seen before, but I am finding it difficult to believe."

"Lay it on me EDI," Shepard insisted glad that at least someone was seeing something familiar along with her.

"These readings are consistent with scans that I took of the Collector Base." The tapping of EDI's heels on the floor paused and Shepard stopped to turn and stand beside her, reading the scans over her shoulder.

Garrus joined her to get a look as well. "You mean the Reaper baby?" he asked, a grumble starting in his throat as he translated the readings.

"So that _was_ what they were doing in here," Shepard mused, remembering her and Anderson's guess as to why the bodies had all been gathered and the captured humans had been sent through the beam to the Citadel. She had nearly forgotten.

"Shepard, the scans are saying that this particular specimen was not destroyed by the Crucible because of it's proximity to the source," EDI said, making Shepard's blood freeze in her veins.

"Are you saying there is a live Reaper on this station?" Shepard shouted, her voice echoing in the otherwise silent building.

"It has not been completed, due to the sheer number of humans that is required to successfully birth a mature Reaper..." EDI began.

"But it is still alive," Shepard interrupted, shuddering to think that there was one of the bastards still active.

EDI nodded. "It is... The discomfort you and the other biotics are feeling is likely a generator creating a mass effect field around the specimen."

"How did we not catch this before?" Shepard groaned.

"Because this place is creepy and no one wanted to scan it," James said with a shrug, his voice raised in a question.

"Let's just find it and get out of here," Liara said softly.

"Yeah, I'm getting a migraine," Kaidan agreed.

Shepard moved ahead with renewed vigor, wishing she had brought a lot more grenades. Or a nuke. Yes, a nuke would work. Her head pounded in time with her steps as the creepy feeling spread the farther they ascended the building. Coming out of the stairwell to check the 30th floor, Shepard wiped a bead of sweat from her forehead, her calves complaining. Not looking where she was going, she was lurched backwards as Garrus pulled her back through the doorway. "Watch it!" He grunted as she turned the annoyed glare away from him to look where she had almost stepped.

"Dios!" James cursed as they shone their flashlights into the abyss.

Spread out before them was a crater in the building that dropped below as far as Shepard could see and then some. She peered out over the edge, squinting into the darkness. "Thanks Big Guy." He nodded and she looked up above to the forty or so odd floors that loomed overhead. They'd all been carved out, leaving room for the suspended monstrosity before them.

"The generator _has_ to be on this floor," Kaidan said, his voice pinched in discomfort.

The humanoid Reaper was even less complete than the last one, and it showed no signs of life. The tubes connecting it to the flow of goop that would eventually give it life were halted mid pump, revealing the liquid that had glowed with an orange hue at the Collector base to be a dull, sickly gray. Shepard felt her lip curl back and she stepped backwards into Garrus' chest. "That way," EDI pointed, unphased by the sight of the metal skeleton. It was old news. Something she had seen before.

EDI started off in the direction she had pointed and Shepard forced herself to follow, hugging the small ledge that had been left after the building had been carved out. "You killed one of these before?" Liara asked as she followed close behind Shepard.

"At the Collector base," Garrus answered for her. "Although that one was much more complete.

"If this one wakes up, I really don't relish having to fight it from this tiny ledge," Shepard grimaced as the dark maw taunted her from below.

"Wait, wakes up?" James asked, a hint of panic in his tone. "All I've got is a shotgun, Lola."

"Go for the optics," Shepard said with a sideways grin at Garrus who chuckled. "At least we won't be fighting off Collectors and Harbinger this time, too."

"Well, you just took all of the fun out of it," Garrus complained sarcastically.

"You two have a very odd definition of fun," Kaidan said.

"I think I knew that," Liara added with a sigh.

EDI led them around the circumference of the building to an intact office where a large machine had been set up in the middle of the room. Kaidan hovered in the doorway and Shepard couldn't blame him. Even with her upgraded amp implant, the headache was nauseating. "Let's shut this thing down so us biotics can breathe," she said, forcing herself into the room with the machine as a metallic buzz shrieked in her head. "Nails on a damn chalkboard," she grunted as she called up a kill command on her omnitool. When the machine ground to a halt with a spark and a low groan, Shepard sighed in relief as the field dissipated and the headache almost immediately cleared off. "Kaidan, you all right out there?" she asked over her shoulder as she heard Liara's own breathy exhalation.

"So long as that machine stays off," he agreed, a shifting telling her he had rolled his shoulders to shrug off the last of his discomfort. "Now how do we deal with this thing?"

"Last time, we dropped it from it's perch by taking out the weak points in the glass tubes, but that woke it up," Shepard said with a shrug, stepping back out from the room.

"Maybe a concentrated blast?" Garrus suggested. "Nuke it before it gets a chance to wake up."

"I'm all for that, but me and Esteban used all the C4 we had on the shuttle to take out Leviathan," James informed them.

"Then we find more. It's not like we can save C-Sec HQ anyhow," Shepard shrugged, already on her omnitool. "Steve, you there?"

"Sure. What is it, Shepard?" Steve answered almost immediately.

"We ran into a situation at C-Sec and I was wondering if you could use your miraculous procurement skills to find us a metric shit ton of C4," she said with a grin.

He chuckled on the other end of the line, and she could picture the amused sparkle in his midnight blue eyes. "How much exactly is a metric shit ton, Commander?"

She shrugged. "As much as you can find... Enough to take out a 100 story building?" she guessed.

"I'm not even going to ask," he said with a sigh. "I'll see what I can do, Shepard."

He dropped the call and she glanced around at the others. Liara had a protest on the tip of her tongue and Shepard cocked her head. "What is it, Liara?"

"We're going to need a lot of Biotics to erect a barrier strong enough to contain that blast. Unless of course, you wish to blow the arm off the Citadel," she said with a smirk, crossing her arms.

"We've got that covered," Shepard said, flapping a hand. "We've got seven Biotics on board, including Jack. If everyone combines their power, we should be able to pull it off.

Liara seemed to do some calculating in her head as she stared up at the massive construct. "I suppose you're right. Javik will be thrilled to have something to do. I think he's getting a bit stir crazy without something to fight."

"Aren't you two... writing a book?" Shepard said suggestively as she grinned at Liara.

Her friend's cheeks flushed purple and Shepard chuckled. "You're terrible, Shepard."

Suddenly Shepard had a thought. Would Javik be all right with Liara handing her body over to science for her and Garrus' sake? When Liara had agreed to have their baby, she had been just her. Now she had Javik and he was a fickle creature. The subject had not been discussed in much depth since it's origin and Shepard swallowed, wondering if she was getting her hopes up to be dashed. Quickly changing the subject, she cleared her throat and said, "I suppose we should get back and collect the others. James, I want you, Kaidan and EDI here to keep an eye on this thing."

She left the room in a hurry, heading for the stairwell so they could make their way back down. Garrus caught up with her as she descended the first flight. "What's up, Shepard?" he asked, stopping her short with a hand wrapped around her arm.

Liara caught up as well, frowning. Shepard paused and leaned on the handrail as Garrus' hand lingered on her arm. " _We_ need to have a talk," she said pointedly, adding Liara to the conversation.

"What about?" Liara asked, a small amount of shock in her tone.

"This thing you agreed to do for us," Shepard hinted, warily. "When we spoke at the FOB, you and Javik weren't... together. It just occurred to me that us asking you to do this is really unfair."

Liara balked and Garrus grunted, his subvocals erupting with nerves. "Shepard's right," he admitted grudgingly.

"You didn't _ask_ me to do anything," Liara said. "I volunteered... happily. Just because I am with Javik now, doesn't change how I feel about this or the two of you."

Shepard hugged herself. "But what about him? Have you asked his opinion?"

Liara crossed her arms and cocked her hip. "As a matter of fact, I have. And surprisingly enough, he was adamant that I do as I promised. He is big on oaths."

Shepard's racing heart slowed and she sighed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to freak out. It's just... when that occurred to me..."

Liara chuckled and reached out to pull Shepard into a hug. "It's all right. I understand."

Shepard fell into the embrace, burying herself in Liara. Garrus' relieved purring was interrupted when he spoke. "We do still need to talk, though. The question of when we intend to... do... this... is still looming." he sputtered awkwardly.

Shepard chuckled, "Let's knock a baby Reaper from it's perch first. Then I'm all ears."

Liara allowed her to pull away and an amused smirk crossed her features. "We can perhaps make a date of it. I will bring Javik and we will sit down an talk everything out."

"Oh, that'll be fun," Garrus said, his eyes rolling in a very human gesture.

"Hey, if this meld is going to be anything like when Liara and I joined on the Normandy after I got the Cipher, Javik will need to be part of the plans," Shepard said with her own smirk.

Liara's face flushed again. "I had almost forgotten my awkward misstep."

Shepard snorted, starting back down the stairs. "It was anything but awkward, Liara."

Garrus chuckled as well. "I remember when you approached me to talk. I was innocently working on the Mako, and that was when I discovered you could hear my subvocals. I believe your exact words were, 'You're purring, I can't'..." The approximation of her voice as he mimicked her drew a sharp laugh from her that echoed in the stairwell.

"I swear, I almost jumped your bones right there," she admitted, remembering back to how his subharmonics had affected her even then, before she had ever dreamed they would end up where they were. "Then I went and hid in my quarters for almost a day... If the Alliance ever decided to dig into my browser history..." she sighed, letting them formulate their own conclusions as to what she had been up to that day.

"Looking up porn on the brass' time. For shame, Shepard," Garrus taunted with a glimmer in his eye.

She waved a hand. "It probably all got jumbled in with Joker's."

"You two are both terrible," Liara said following behind them.

"Please, like the Shadow Broker doesn't have her own private stash. Do I need to look up _your_ browser history, T'Soni?" Shepard threatened in a mocking tone.

"There are more important things happening in the galaxy besides porn," Liara said sheepishly.

"Nothing is more important than porn," Shepard said with a chuckle.

* * *

 

It was staring at her, it's dull lidless eyes making her squirm. Steve had miraculously found 'a metric shit ton' of C4 as she had asked and currently, Liara was using her biotics to hover just above the floating shuttle and place the bricks strategically around the thing as Kaidan guided her over the comm. Shepard watched from the ledge on the 52nd floor, her pistol clutched in her palms as she tried to brush away the eeriness of the metal skeleton. She was standing a bit too close to the edge for Garrus' tastes and he gently took hold of her elbow and pulled her backwards. When she tossed him a smirk he shrugged. "I heard crumbling," he said by way of explanation.

"How's it going?" Shepard asked, ready to finish off the last of the Reapers.

"Just a couple more bricks," Kaidan relayed back over the comms.

Shepard sighed in relief. It had been hours since Steve had showed up with the rest of the biotics and the C4. Placing the bricks had been a drawn out and carefully executed process. Now came the hard part. She tucked away her pistol and shook out her hands, removing her gloves. Skin to skin contact would work best. Jack stood up from her seat behind Shepard where she had dragged a mostly clean desk chair from one of the offices still intact. "You ready Jack? I hope you ate your Wheaties this morning..."

Jack snorted. "I'm good. It's the rest of you weaklings that better be ready to pick up the slack."

When Steve brought Liara and Kaidan back to the ledge, Shepard had anyone who wasn't a biotic leave the premises. "Be careful," Garrus said in parting.

They stood in a line, Jack in the middle with Shepard, Kaidan and Jacob on one side, Liara, Javik and Miranda on the other. After dancing in place for a second and shaking out her arms, Jack took in a breath and lifted her arms, palms outward and erected a gigantic barrier that slowly spread to encompass the entire Proto-Reaper. Shepard could feel the hum of the biotics on her skin. She reached out, placing her own palm on Jack's bare shoulder and calling her biotics to the surface. "Damn Shepard! You've got some juice!" The barrier intensified and spread. "I may not even need the others."

The second Kaidan touched her bare neck and Liara placed a palm on Jack's other shoulder, Shepard and Jack began to laugh simultaneously. "Holy..." Shepard breathed as the thrill of so much energy raced through her nerve endings and exploded her senses. "Everyone else, back off for now. Don't add more unless you see us start to struggle. Kaidan, you got the detonator?"

"Yeah," he choked, his voice heady. She heard a soft blip over the sound of rushing water in her head as he pressed the button to set off the timer for the charges.

"Here goes nothing," Shepard said as she counted down in her head. The C4 began to go off, starting in the core of the Reaper near it's firing chamber and spreading through it's chest and head. The sight of the thing exploding made Shepard's heart soar. The last of the Reapers. When the thing fell from its supports to hit the bottom of the bubble, Jack grunted and Shepard sent more biotics into the mix, the barrier thickening slightly as her skin tingled with phantom sparks of heat from the explosions happening inside. It felt like they stood there forever, but the series of explosions likely only took two minutes. As the heat and flames died down, Jack pulled the barrier tighter around the smoking bits of metal and lowered it to the ground as far down as the pit went. When the hunk of metal hit bottom, Jack dropped her arms and the barrier dissipated, the clanking of falling metal a welcome sound as the pieces settled. Shepard reigned in her own biotics and Kaidan dropped his hand from her neck. She glanced behind her at him to make sure he hadn't strained himself. With a small nod to say he was all right, she smiled and patted Jack's shoulder before removing her hand. "Good job everyone."

"We should probably go down and make sure we got it for good," Miranda suggested, already turning to head down the endless flights of stairs to get to the lower floors.

Shepard chuckled. "I'm pretty sure we got it, Miri."

Nevertheless, she and the others all followed Miranda down, Liara taking it slow after using a lot more biotics than the rest of them to place the C4. Shepard heard Javik asking after her as he allowed her to lean on him as they circled the stairwell. "I am fine. Just tired," Liara answered, her voice low.

Shepard practically bounced down the stairs, her excitement at her plan having worked mixing with the burst of extra energy she had gotten from the shared biotics. On the bottom floor, she pushed open the door and poked her head in to the dark. She brought up her omnitool and began to scan the area. All of the readings that EDI had gotten previously had vanished and the smoking metal was simply that. Shepard sighed, allowing all of her tension to flow from her shoulders. "Let's get back to the Normandy. I think a few of us could use a nap. Steve, it's safe to come back."

A few minutes later, the Kodiak reappeared outside the building as they exited and they all climbed in. "I hope you recorded the explosion," Garrus hummed as she sat down next to him.

She tapped her visor and grinned. "What do you think?"

"That's my girl," he said with an answering grin of his own

 


	46. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Let's make a baby!"

Shepard was waiting nervously in her apartment while Garrus picked up his father and sister with the Kodiak. The night before, after working off her biotic buzz, they had painstakingly spent hours preparing a Turian dish that was now in the oven. She had prepared herself some lasagna and she planned to bring the leftovers to the rest of the crew after what she had decided was likely to be the most awkward dinner experience she was ever going to have.

Garrus planned on picking up his family, bringing them back to the apartment and then breaking the news about their relationship after softening his father up with the news of rebuilding C-Sec in their spare time. Shepard had fabricated herself a knee length maxi dress in Vakarian blue, gotten a manicure from Garrus the night before and had applied a light dusting of eyeshadow and lip gloss to go with the short french braid that she had managed to get into her hair. She felt both over and under-dressed and had considered changing at least four times already. Garrus had left before she had dressed and she had not had the chance to get his opinion.

She nibbled on her lower lip and twirled her ring around her finger as she stared at the door, willing it to open. Her stomach was in knots. Finally she heard voices and she almost panicked, forcing herself to remain seated at the bar stool in the middle of the kitchen. She leaned casually on the counter, trying to slow her racing heart. She knew Garrus could hear her heartbeat. She was going to give herself away before he even had a chance to bring them up. She swallowed as the door hissed open and then she stood, walking with a jerking gait toward the entryway. She laid eyes on him first as he stepped inside the apartment like he owned the place. "Garrus!" she said with a smile. His presence thankfully was calming her nerves as he returned the smile, his mood seemingly good so far. Coming in close behind him was and older Turian, the spitting image of Garrus, and then bringing up the rear was a female also holding a resemblance to both Garrus and his father.

"Shepard," Garrus said, drawing her attention back to him as the door closed them all in. "I'd like to introduce you to my father, Castis Vakarian, and my sister Solana."

"It's wonderful to meet you both," Shepard said, stepping forward to hold out her hand to shake. "I've heard a lot about you."

Castis Vakarian set a gaze on her that could have turned any self respecting person to stone. His eyes were not the soft comforting blue of Garrus', but a steely gray that blended with his slightly porous skin. Shepard felt her cheeks flushing as he sized her up with a sweep of that gaze before reaching out to shake her hand briefly. "And we've heard much about you." His subharmonics gave her nothing but the deep sense that he was formulating an opinion about her already and it was none too pleasant. "I've been itching to meet the SPECTRE that dragged my son away from C-Sec."

A sharp flanging snort rose from Garrus' right as Solana elbowed past her father and inserted her grinning face into Shepard's view. "I'm Solana." She shot a glare at her father and took Shepard's hand warmly. "It's a pleasure to finally meet the woman behind the legends." Like all females, Solana lacked the long fringe on the top of her head, leaving her skin bare. Her flesh was tan, the same color as Garrus' and her plates were also the same light gray of his. Her mandibles stretched further out in the back and swept gracefully upwards, distinguishing her even more as a female. She had her father's eyes, but they did not make Shepard feel inadequate. They were kind and a little bit mischievous. She was shorter than Garrus, but only by a few inches.

Shepard pulled her head back and wrinkled her nose. "Legends?"

Solana snorted again, her subharmonics an open book. "The way Gar talks about you, you'd call them legends, too."

Shepard shrugged and added her own snort. "I do what I can. Please, come in and make yourselves at home. Would anyone like a drink?" Shepard asked, stepping out of the way.

Garrus beat her to the bar as Solana and Castis moved further into the apartment and took seats on the couch. Shepard retrieved the amino neutral liquor and sighed, her hands shaking as she screwed the corkscrew through the corrugate. "He hates me," she hissed quietly as Garrus pulled some glasses from below the bar.

"Give it some time. Relax," he soothed, keeping a sharp reign on his own subharmonics. "You look great, by the way."

She yanked the cork from the bottle and sighed. "The sooner he stops staring me down, the better I'll feel." She shakily poured four glasses and they each took two. Garrus handed his extra to his father and Shepard sat down on the far couch, handing her extra to Solana. Garrus chose to sit dangerously close to her.

With another calculating look, Castis sipped his drink and then said, "So Garrus tells me that the Normandy is assisting in relief efforts on the Citadel and you've begun to reorganize C-Sec. I didn't think a SPECTRE would see much use in C-Sec. I must admit I'm a bit shocked."

"No one else seems interested in rebuilding anything that really matters to keep order," she said with another shrug as Garrus hummed beside her with what sounded like pride. "We've hit a few hiccups along the way, but I'm confident if we can get a few recruits, things will start to return to normal."

"Shepard is an expert at recruiting good people for helpless causes," Garrus said with a chuckle.

Castis' eyes fell on Garrus and he harrumphed. "Shouldn't you show a little more respect for your commanding officer, Garrus?"

A strange click sounded in Garrus' subvocals and he glanced out of the corner of his eyes at Shepard. "Listen, Dad, there's something we needed to talk about..." Garrus said quietly.

Solana's subvocals erupted in an excited purr as she likely figured out what was happening. Castis glanced between her and the two of them sitting so close together on the couch. "Oh, this should be good," Solana chuckled leaning into the back of the couch and crossing her legs to sip her drink while she watched the scene unfold around her.

"Shepard started out as my Commanding officer, but we quickly formed a friendship that led to a very confusing realization for both of us that there was something much more between us..." Garrus began as his father's subvocals began to rumble in what Shepard interpreted as disappointment.

Her shoulders slumped as Castis grunted and set his drink down on the coffee table, carefully aiming for the exact center of the coaster. Solana was laughing in her chest before Castis shot his gaze at her and she swallowed the subharmonics in favor of a grin that she attempted to hide behind her glass. "If your mother had lived to see this..." Castis began, but Garrus cut him off.

"Mom knew," he corrected.

Shepard straightened her back and looked at him with a frown. That was news to her. "Exactly how long has this been going on?" Castis asked, one of his brow plates rising in mild surprise.

"Almost two years," Garrus said boldly, sitting forward in his seat as Castis did as well. "I've asked her to join the clan, Sir."

Shepard could feel the tension between the two and she sat forward as well to insert herself between them. "And I've accepted... but I wanted to meet you and earn my place in the Vakarian family." Castis' glare settled on her and she refused to flinch. She loved Garrus. She had no intention of backing down just because his father's glare could shatter glass. She was made of more than glass. "Listen. I know you aren't a fan of SPECTREs, but I am more than a title. I'm a soldier, a Commander. I've seen more in the last five years than most people see in their entire lives. Hell, I've been dead three times, but I'm still here. And your son has been there through it all, covering my six. That's where he belongs."

Castis maintained the calculating stare, but some of the ice melted as she spoke and he edged back from his perch on the edge of the couch. "Spirits, I don't think I've ever seen someone stare down Dad like that," Solana said softly.

"Sol!" Garrus grunted, his own tense posture still rigidly maintained.

Solana simply shrugged and sipped her drink again. "I'm just saying, Gar. Your girlfriend's got a quad."

"And the headbutt to back it up," Garrus agreed, finally allowing his subharmonics to open up with the same adoring trilling she'd gotten used to hearing in recent months.

His father's eyes fell on Garrus and Shepard turned her head to look at him as well with a smile, boldly setting her hand on his thigh in an attempt to calm his tension. He leaned in and touched his forehead to hers. She accepted the affection with a soft smile and Castis grunted, drawing her attention back to him. With a deep sigh, Castis gave up his remaining ground. "If they can make Adrian Victus Primarch of Palaven, who am I to stand in the way of my son joining with the woman he clearly cherishes?"

Garrus' subvocals came to a grinding halt and he pulled away from Shepard to stare with his own calculating eyes. "You'd give your blessing, just like that?"

"Just like when you left C-Sec, son... I'm your father, not your Warden. A human SPECTRE may not be my first choice for a mate, but you've clearly made up your mind. I lost your mother and nearly lost both of my children in this war... I'm not willing to give up any more." Then his gaze slid to Shepard as her heart raced. "And I believe I owe you a debt, Commander Shepard."

"Me?" she asked, still shaken by his change in tone.

Castis nodded and crossed his arms as he sat back in a relaxed posture. "When I spoke to Garrus when he was on Omega, I thought I was never going to see my son again. You pulled him out and I owe you for his life."

"To be fair, he did take a rocket to the face on my watch," she said with a sharp chuckle, lifting her hand to rub a thumb across his scars. He leaned his head into her palm and began to purr.

Solana sat forward and tapped her empty glass down on the table without a coaster. "Well, it's official. I'm the favorite."

Garrus snorted. "You were always the favorite, Sol."

In spite of his blessing and his thanks, Castis Vakarian was still a very difficult man to get to know. Shepard found herself at a loss for words several times through the evening. On the other hand, Garrus' sister was like talking to herself. Solana was sharp and funny and she had a personality to match the mischief in her eyes. When dinner was served, Garrus gave all the credit to Shepard with a sideways wink, a promise that he would finally get on with teaching her now that things had settled down buried in his expression.

As they sat around the table, Castis cleared his throat and Garrus groaned as if he knew what was coming. "So, the Primarch tells me that you have both refused a seat on the council."

Shepard dropped her fork, the metal clattering noisily against her plate as the statement hung over the table. She had been thinking hard about that same question. They had the Normandy working around the clock, every one on board doing their part to rebuild C-Sec and get the Citadel up and running again so the galaxy could begin to function normally. With the Normandy grounded and the hundreds of recommendations pouring in from Earth and the Alliance, she had begun to notice that she had been voted in, whether she liked it or not. Her refusal was delaying the process, as was Garrus'. When she had stuck Anderson with the position four years ago, she hadn't given it a second thought. He had stepped up in spite of his feelings on the matter and had done what needed doing. Who was she to not do the same when she was needed? Garrus sighed. "Is this really dinner table conversation, Sir?"

It was like Thanksgiving in the Shepard household all over again. Her mother, being the fantastic cook she had always been, hosted Thanksgiving dinner every year for a large group of their friends in the colony. When the men would get together and have a few beers while watching the parades from Earth and switching back and forth to the biotiball championships, politics never failed to be dredged up and make tempers flare. She sighed and picked her fork back up so she could move her food around on the plate. "Yes, and I am starting to think we're wrong..."

Garrus spared her a frown as he pulled his mandibles close to his cheeks and his chest began to rumble disapprovingly. "I agree. I've been tracking your progress through this war, Commander Shepard, and I can see the potential in you to make the difficult decisions that will shape this galaxy for the future. My son may be rash, but he has a good head on his shoulders, as humans like to say, and I think the Primarch is correct. With the two of you on the council as a united front, it may not be as bad as you think."

"It would be the first time the council ever agreed on anything besides a good stonewalling," Shepard grunted sarcastically.

"I can see your frustration for the institution, but this might be your chance to whip them back into shape," Castis hummed thoughtfully.

"You've got to be joking," Garrus grumbled.

Shepard reached over and took his hand in hers. "Think about our plans, it might be a good idea to settle down here for a while. What use are soldiers without a war?"

"A seat on the Council is _not_ retirement, Shepard, and the Citadel is hardly warm and tropical," he argued.

She snorted and said, "Do you really see either of us retiring any time soon? You've seen my inbox, Big Guy. What's the point of saving the galaxy if the politicians are just going to screw it up again? Esheel already has the idea in her head that she is running this place. I could see it in her eyes on the docking bay. Without a stabilizing force, this will turn into a power struggle."

His disapproving glare slowly softened as her thoughts on the situation were finally voiced. She watched his mandibles relax into defeat as he realized she was right. "I don't like this," he sighed heavily.

She squeezed his hand lightly and pressed her lips together in a thin smile. "Neither do I, but us delaying is opening the vacuum of power wider every day."

"Everyone else seems convinced that it is the right thing to do," he admitted. Then he returned the squeeze to her hand before pulling away and running his hand through his fringe. "I guess I'm on board."

With one final smile, she returned to her food and glanced at Solana, steering the conversation away from the dreary. "So, Sol, got any embarrassing stories from when Garrus was a kid?"

"Of course I do!" Solana said with a chuckle, more than willing to lend a hand to a brighter conversation.

"Careful, Shepard," he warned with a teasing growl. "I've got some pretty embarrassing stories to tell about you, too."

With the politicking out of the way, the conversation turned lighter as Solana shared dozens of childhood stories about her and Garrus and he teased her back for being the worst shot in the family, all while Castis sat quietly observing everything around him. Garrus had told Shepard that was how he operated, gathering all of the facts and silently formulating his own opinions. It was a C-Sec thing. When the evening ended, Shepard offered to let them stay in the guest rooms, and Garrus offered to fly them wherever they wished to go, but his father shooed them both off, saying they had already set up accommodations through the Primarch. When the door shut behind them, and Shepard heard the elevator begin it's descent, she turned and slumped against the door with a sigh. "That wasn't awkward at all," she groaned.

"I actually think Dad liked you," Garrus said moving to pull her away from the door and into his arms. "So are we really going to accept the council positions?" he asked, his mandibles pulling some of her hair from her braid as he rested his chin on her head.

"I don't think we have a choice. The longer we wait, the worse this is going to get," she said with a sigh, huddling closer to his neck.

"I know... and at least you're right about one thing. Settling down might be a good idea for the time being," he agreed, pulling away and smoothing her hair down with a grin.

"Speaking of which, we need to set up that date with Liara and Javik," she nudged him before moving past him to go to the kitchen and start to clean up. She kicked off the flat shoes she was wearing to let her toes breathe and relaxed in her kitchen. It had been a long time since she had cooked anything as intricate as the lasagna and it had felt good to focus on something that wasn't life or death.

"When you're finished there, would you like to start figuring out how to make this joining thing work?" he asked, leaning on the wall between the kitchen and the living room, the picture of cool as he grinned at her with excitement.

"Absolutely," she agreed, snapping the lid on the casserole dish full of lasagna and then hunting down the lid for his leftovers. "You know this would go faster if you started to load the dishwasher."

* * *

 

They found themselves sitting casually at the top of the stairs near their bedroom, omnitools glowing softly in the dim lighting of the apartment. Shepard's legs were propped upward across his lap as she leaned back against the railing. She heard a confused grumble from his throat and looked up to see him frowning at his screen. She nudged his chest with her bare foot, her short dress pooled in her lap. "What's up Big Guy?"

"This whole thing about the 'bride' being 'given away'. I don't understand it," he grumbled.

"That's a really old tradition," she shrugged. "Usually it is reserved for the father to turn his daughter over into the care of her groom. There are exceptions if there is no father, or if the bride chooses another person, but we don't need it." She turned her attention back to her own research, swallowing as she casually flapped her hand like she didn't care.

His short chuff told her he wasn't going to abandon it. "Shepard, you don't need subharmonics for me to know that struck a nerve."

She sighed and dropped her arm into her lap to join the cloth of her skirt. "I don't have any family outside of the Normandy. There is no one to give me away. It's no big deal."

"You said it yourself, the bride can choose another person. Why not someone from the Normandy?" he asked softly. "There are plenty of Turian traditions that you've written down on that little list of yours, but very few human ones."

She chuckled. "And you think you're not a very good Turian... outside of the legal horrors, humanity doesn't bring much to the table tradition wise unless you're a certain religion. I'm not. I've got white dresses, bridesmaids, and rice... I like Turian joining ceremonies much better than human weddings."

"Rice?" he asked, his nose plates pressing together.

"Oh, you haven't gotten to that one yet?" she chuckled and he leaned over as she beckoned his arm so she could scroll through his search parameters and pull up a few vids from weddings on Earth. "Something about prosperity, fertility and good fortune," she explained. "Not one I'm particularly fond of to be honest."

"I'd be cleaning rice out of my cowl for months," he mused as he watched the vids of people throwing rice at a couple as they exited a church.

"Like I said. Turian ceremonies are way nicer," she shrugged.

"I kind of like this hand-fasting thing," he said, pulling up one of the research pages and showing it to her.

"Very old school," she agreed. "And it fits with the simplicity of the Turian marking ceremony..."

"So, you come out in your white dress..."

"Off white," she corrected. "I'm no virgin, Vakarian," she teased.

"In your 'off white' dress," he said, clearing his throat. "You make your way to me, the Primarch and Hackett stand as witness while we exchange our vows and... someone... ties different colored strings around our wrists to join our hands. Then we mark each other, which I have no idea how you intend to mark me with those tiny human teeth... and we are pronounced... then comes us retiring alone so I can give you my family's clan marks and then the party."

"Another human tradition... open bar," she said with a grin.

"I think we can squeeze another human tradition in there," he said gently. "Ask someone to give you away."

Shepard sighed. "If you insist... This is going to be worse than squad selection."

* * *

 

Shepard's hands hovered over her console as she tried to find the words that might draw Samara from Lessus for the wedding. She had already sent out a message to Kasumi in hopes that she may come out of whatever hole she was hiding in.

_Dear Samara,_

_I am sending this out in hopes that you have returned to Lessus to be with Falere after the Reapers fell. I'm concerned that we haven't heard from you. In case you hadn't heard, I survived, barely, and we have begun to repair the damage done to the galaxy by the Crucible. Garrus has asked me to join his clan and we have painstakingly spent a week in what little free time we have, trying to perfect combining our vastly different traditions. There was a favor I wanted to ask you, if you wish to attend. We have chosen a non religious hand-fasting ceremony from human traditions and I know you are familiar with the process. If you would be the one to tie our bonds, I would be honored. Please contact me back and let me know you're alive. It would be wonderful to hear from you._

_Shepard._

That was the easy part. Shepard had given a lot of thought in the last week to who she wished to give her away. They had some spare time after speaking with the Primarch while they awaited the arrival of the Asari delegates. Once they arrived, the council would have their first official meeting. Shepard had plans for that meeting and she didn't intend on backing down. For the time being, she would get her own life in order.

She pushed away from her desk and shuffled out the door to the elevator that would take her to the CIC. In spite of the Normandy being grounded for the foreseeable future, her target rarely left the ship. Most of the crew had dispersed, finding their own trouble to get into on the Citadel while things slowly went back to normal. She left the elevator, hands stuffed in her hoodie pockets and crossed the deserted CIC to the bridge. The door was open and Shepard walked in to EDI and Joker talking casually in their respective seats. "Do you two ever get out and do something fun?" she asked with a smirk, interrupting their conversation.

"Not much to do on a broken Citadel, Shepard," Joker said with a small shrug.

Still smiling, Shepard glanced at EDI. "Do you think I could borrow Joker for a minute?"

EDI smiled and nodded her head. "I will be in the AI core."

She stood and left with a casual lingering touch to Joker's shoulder and closed the door behind her. "So what's with the ominous?" Joker asked as Shepard moved to take over EDI's seat.

"Nothing ominous," Shepard said with a shrug as her knees began to bounce as she fidgeted. "I just wanted to talk to you."

"Fire away," Joker said, turning his reclined chair to face her and folding his hands over his stomach.

She bit her lip and sighed. "So Garrus and I have been working on our wedding plans lately..."

"And you need someone to provide the bachelor party with some strippers... I got you covered," he said sarcastically.

She snorted and shook her head. "No. I was actually wondering if you might... give me away..." she said, her tone questioning and unsure as she was uncertain of how he might react.

His jaw fell open and he sat a few inches straighter. "Oh, shit... really? You want brittle bones guy to limp you down the aisle?"

"You're not just brittle bones guy, Joker. You're basically my oldest friend," she said truthfully. He'd been piloting the Normandy from the first day she'd gotten on the SR1, and they had immediately began to trade jabs when they'd been introduced.

"Aww Shepard, you're gonna make me cry," he said mockingly.

"Shut up. Are you going to do it or not?" she asked with a gentle kick to the bottom of his chair.

"Of course I am," he said with a grin. "It's an honor. Aww man, does this mean I need to wear dress blues? Last time I dusted those off was your funeral... weird."

He spun in his chair to return his attention to the console in front of him and she stood up to pat his shoulder. "Thanks, Joker. This means a lot to me."

"Yeah yeah, get out of here before I do cry," he said waving his hand dismissively.

* * *

 

A few restaurants had been tentatively re-opened on the Citadel, offering light fare menus to attract the people that had started to flock to the station. The evening after she asked Joker to walk her down the aisle, she was sitting at a table at a place called The Melting Pot in a casual tank top and dark jeans. Over his drink, Javik stared at her, his four eyes blinking in tandem. The restaurant had a collection of dishes from all over the galaxy from all different species, and Shepard attempted to study the levo selection as his eyes bored into her. Beside her, Garrus' subvocals hummed with nerves. _I take it back,_ Shepard thought, _this is the most awkward dinner I've ever attended._

Liara glanced up from her menu and smiled casually as if she felt none of the tension in the air that was hovering over the rest of the table. "This is a nice place, Shepard. Where did you find it?"

Shepard cleared her throat. "Actually, Sol, Garrus' sister, told me about it. It was apparently a pretty big deal before the Reapers. Like Ryussi big," She explained, her cheeks flushing as she brought up the Sushi place that had been destroyed in the clone incident.

"Well, let's hope no one starts shooting up the place this time," Garrus hummed.

"Oh, I came prepared this time," Shepard said, indicating the small bulge in her waist where she had stuffed her pistol.

"That's my girl," he said with a grin, reaching out to rub her back affectionately.

Liara rolled her eyes and smiled. "At least I know your daughter will be well protected," she said, opening the floor for the rest of the conversation to begin.

Shepard felt a chill run down her spine as Javik grunted. "Listen, Javik. We wanted you here for your opinion on this whole idea of Liara's. I know you weren't in the picture when she made this promise to me, and I'd understand if it made you uncomfortable..."

He pulled back from the table where his elbows rested and chuckled bemusedly. "Commander, my species lives much longer than a Human or a Turian. If Liara wishes to grant you a biological child, what is a few months out of that life for her to do as she wishes? I'll not interfere."

"That's incredibly kind of you," Shepard said, her shoulders loosening as she heard the tone of his voice as he spoke firsthand. Javik was a very difficult creature to read.

"So I hear that you have been making plans for your bonding ceremony," Liara said. "Joker was rather pleased with himself."

"He'll get over it," Shepard said with a chuckle, reaching to sip her drink.

Liara's penetrating eyes studied Shepard before she said. "Did you wish to perform the meld before or after the ceremony?"

Shepard exchanged glances with Garrus and he shrugged. "We were going to leave that up to you. You're the one going to be put through the most with this crazy idea. We kind of just need to show up..."

"We're hoping to set the ceremony for a few months from now so that this council nonsense won't interfere," Garrus explained. "If you need the time to... prepare... then it's all right if you want to wait."

Liara laughed softly, "I have already done all of the 'preparing' I need, Garrus. I would be ready tonight if you choose..."

Garrus' mandibles pulled comically away from his face in surprise as she dropped the news on them. "Just putting that out there, huh, T'Soni?" Shepard chuckled, taking his hand and squeezing in assurance.

Liara shrugged. "Don't you think it's nicer if it is spur of the moment? I don't think scheduling something like this is very..."

"Romantic?" Shepard finished for her.

Liara nodded with a coy smile. "Yes."

Shepard and Garrus had a silent conversation in milliseconds as they exchanged glances. She was ready, and if he was too, then she was willing. "Okay," she said, her eyes falling on Liara again. "Let's make a baby."

* * *

 

Shepard was a bundle of nerves as they flew back to her apartment in the rented skycar. She had taken the driver's seat and was driving straighter than she ever had in her life. "Liara, you told me that the Commander was bad driver. I don't see where your concern lies," Javik said the corners of his lips pulled up in a grin as he attempted to break the nervous silence that was suffocating them all.

"You haven't seen her drive a Mako," Garrus hummed, his subharmonics surprisingly level.

"The stuff of nightmares," Liara chuckled.

"Half rations to everyone..." Shepard said mockingly.

"We aren't aboard the Normandy, Shepard. You don't control our rations in the real world," Garrus teased.

"I control other things, Big Guy," she smirked, loosening up as they fell into a comfortable teasing rhythm.

"That affects you as much as it does me, Shepard. I would rethink that particular punishment," he said, his eyes sparkling as he glanced at her from the passenger seat.

"It's true... I really can't go more than a few days," she said with a self deprecating sigh. She parked the car and they climbed out. Garrus walked beside her as they headed for the towers, his arm snaking around her waist. "I'm glad we decided to do this," she whispered softly.

He rumbled his agreement. "You smelled nervous in the car. Are you all right?"

She nodded. "Fine... It's just... this is our only shot. If it doesn't work..."

He cut her off with a kiss. "It'll work."

In the apartment, Javik left them with a bow to wait in the guest bedroom while the three of them headed into her and Garrus' room. Liara took over the room, moving calmly to sit cross-legged on the bed. She held her hands out, palms up and smiled. Shepard sat down by her left and Garrus slowly joined on her right. "The meld itself is quite simple. Like meditating," Liara explained. "When I joined our consciousnesses before, Shepard, it was a knowledge exchange. This time I will be going much deeper."

Shepard nodded. "Dig away," she agreed, taking Liara's offered hand. It was warm in hers and Shepard felt an almost immediate spark as Liara took Garrus' hand in her other.

"Close your eyes," Liara instructed and Shepard complied. They stood together in a black, blank slate room. Shepard glanced around, wondering where the dandelion puffs had gone from the last time Liara had been in her head. Garrus reached out and took her hand and offered an excited smile. She stepped close to him and Liara silently moved to touch them both. Her eyes closed and Shepard felt a tug in her gut as Liara began to root through her DNA. Her hand tingled where outside her mind, Liara held onto her. She was assaulted with images from her own memories and she inhaled a gasp as the arousal slammed into her as she watched herself and Garrus together. His memories slipped in with hers and she felt disconnected from herself as it became difficult to discern whose eyes she was seeing from. The choking arousal flooded her body and her inner self was drawn into his arms. She had no clue what was happening in the real world, but it certainly felt like Liara was doing something right. Shepard's stomach flipped and she was pulled back to reality. Her chest heaved as she found it difficult to breathe. Liara collapsed onto her back with a joyous chuckle, stretching her limbs. "Goddess, you both are..." she chucked again, not finishing her sentence.

Shepard dragged her eyes from Liara as Garrus' hand slipped over her thigh and continued further up. Her skin felt like it was on fire, heat radiating off of her like asphalt on a summer day. Another sharp inhale from Shepard made his subharmonics explode in a purr and she groaned. "Liara, if you don't want to see a naked Turian, you may want to get your legs working and find Javik."

Liara chuckled again and rolled onto her stomach. Shepard's eyes snapped back to Garrus as he shifted closer to her and she vaguely heard Liara mumble, "Have fun."

She wanted to ask if the meld had worked, but her vision narrowed and the only thing she saw was him. When the door clicked shut his hand tightened around her thigh and the other arm came out so quickly that she gasped as he pulled her beneath him. Her shirt rolled up, exposing her stomach to him and he leaned in to trace his tongue over her skin. She felt her senses explode in the aftermath of Liara's meld, every flutter of his mandibles over her flesh like a river rushing against her, cooling the desperate heat. She pawed at his clothes and could not focus her mind to fiddle with his tiny intricate clasps. Instead, her frustration mounted and she called her biotics, digging her fingers under the cloth and ripping it away. His excited growl made her buck beneath him, reaching up with her legs to pull him against her. She traced over his cowl with her tingling hands and he pressed against her to purr his pleasure. Where had her pants gone? The sensation of his plates parting dragged her hand downwards so she could slip in and take hold of him. His subharmonics exploded above her as she caressed up and down with her biotically charged fingers. "Spirits," he gasped, shoving a hand up under her tank and taking a tight hold on her breast. Her back arched as he squeezed and he leaned in to worry at her neck, pinning her arm between them. She abandoned her ministrations, distracted by the glorious tug of his lips against her skin. Her hum of pleasure had her tipping her head back to give him more room to work and she reached up with her free hand to grip a hold of the headboard. He shifted to free her other hand momentarily only to grab it and pin it with the other above her head, his single hand large enough to secure her with little effort. She tested the waters, tugging lightly against his weight, but he growled and pressed harder, glaring down at her and shaking his head. His free hand moved from her breast to drag his talons lightly down her side. She bucked again and he again restrained her tighter. The excited laughter that barked from her throat had him shifting to teasingly rub against her. He barely needed to hint that he was there before she was dripping with anticipation. "I've half a mind to drag this out until you beg," he rumbled in her ear, still twitching just outside.

She lifted a leg to attempt to wrap it around his waist and draw him inside, but he was a step ahead, pulling away and jostling her leg so she was reaching for empty space. She whimpered and he took hold of her hip, effectively trapping her. "Damn your reach," she half gasped and half moaned. His throaty chuckle had her choking around the urge to plead. She had indomitable will, but he was whittling away at it fast. She could feel him trembling above her, his own will shaking with need through the heady musk of sex that was filling the room. If she could smell it, it had to be overwhelming for him.

She allowed her biotics to flow from her hands and up his arm. He shuddered and his grip loosened. She quickly slipped her hands from their restraint and grabbed for his other arm that pressed her hips against the bed. Pulling him off balance, she again wrapped her legs around his waist and flipped them around to give her the upper hand. After grunting his surprise, he chuckled. "Damn your flexibility. That wasn't fair."

She silenced him with fingers that slipped up beneath his fringe and danced her biotics across his skin. She slowly used his distraction to her advantage, dragging the sensation down his chest while positioning herself above him. Her movement made him hiss as she teasingly pressed her palms to his chest and lifted herself to rub over his tip before lowering her body so he was sheathed inside. He reached up and gripped her arms, pulling her against him as he sat up. She reached her arms around his neck to lift herself and re-position her legs so they were wrapped around him. They sat pressed against each other, him buried deep inside of her and she reached out to caress his face, her fingertips barely touching as one of his hands pressed against her back to keep her lifted and the other slipped up in her hair. She felt his fingers clasp together as he took her hair in his hand and tugged her head to the side so he could take her flesh in his mouth again. Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck and she began to move against him in small circles, neither of them with the upper hand. She felt the grip with his teeth tightening around her skin and she ground her hips harder against him with each stroke. She couldn't help the small whimpering moans that continuously escaped her as every twitch of movement lit her nerves on fire. "Mercy," she groaned.

"I told you I could get you to beg," he said releasing his nearly too tight grip on her neck. His own voice was forced as his mandibles fluttered over the sensitive spot just beneath her ear. He tugged on her hair again and she cried out, causing his fingers to grip her back more tightly. A trickle of blood dripped down from his talon where his grip pierced her skin.

"God," she gasped, as she felt her orgasm tickling near the edge of spilling over. "Garrus... I'm going to..." the sentence was finished with an impassioned cry as the flood gates burst. Her vision blurred as he simultaneously buried himself as deep as he could get and spilled himself inside. All of her muscles were tense as the orgasm rolled through her, making her twitch and buck against him. As it began to recede and she could see straight, her body relaxed and she slumped against him. "Holy hell," she choked.

He chuckled and they both hissed, her muscles tensing again as his voice hummed through her. "Maybe you should get off," he suggested.

She groaned out a chuckle, knowing it was a bad idea and accepting the sensation before quipping, "Oh, I already did that. Spectacularly I might add... I'm gonna need some help here, Big Guy. I can't really feel my legs."

Garrus slipped his hands beneath her and lifted her off him, her head buried in his neck as they both shuddered. When she was safely in his lap, she released her hold on his neck and flopped backwards to lay on her back between his legs. "Are you... bleeding?" he asked, a frown pushing his brow plates together.

She painstakingly rolled onto her left side, using his leg to pull herself around to show him the trickle of blood from where his talons had broke skin. "No big deal. I can barely feel it," she sighed, contentedly laying her cheek against his calf. "Asari sex fogs are _way_ better when you have a partner."

His leg shifted beneath her as he also laid on his back. "Do you think it worked?" he asked softly.

She glanced up at him, unable to see his face from where she was, but she nudged him playfully with her weak leg. "I guess we'll find out whenever Liara has enough wits to speak." Her sweat was beginning to burn on her left side where he had dragged his talons down over her stomach and she rolled back onto her back to get a look at the damage. Her skin was reddened, but she wasn't bleeding and she chuckled. "You did a number on me, Big Guy."

"Hmm?" he said, lifting his head to look down at her as she propped herself up on her elbows. She set a lopsided grin on him as he surveyed his handy work. "Does it hurt?" he asked noting the nonchalant look on her face and teasingly humming.

"Stings a little, yeah," she said with her own teasing sarcasm. "I might need you to play doctor for me."

He snorted and dropped his head back down. "Then you're just going to have to bleed out because I'm gonna need some time after that performance."

She laughed and dragged herself over his leg to crawl up the bed to lay beside him. "Yeah, I think I'm going to be feeling that orgasm for a few hours."

They laid together, catching their breath as Shepard's limbs relearned how to function properly. "When you came to me that day on the Normandy after Sidonis, did you ever picture us where we are today?" he asked out of the blue.

"I don't know about you," she said shifting so she was facing him. "But I had been struggling with my feelings for months. When I woke up in that Cerberus Lab, the first person I missed was you. When you turned out to be Archangel..." she sighed, remembering how after she'd found Garrus the picture of Kaidan had never been quite as comforting. "That was it for me... even if I didn't know it yet."

He rolled on his side to face her, his smile shining in his eyes as he reached over to tuck her sweaty hair behind her ear. "When you came over that bridge, that pissed off glare on your face because I'd taken a shot at you..." he sighed. "I thought I'd died. In spite of the scars, I knew it was you, the second I saw you, but that was impossible. You were dead... logically, so was I... If I thought I had died and gone to heaven and you were the one there... I guess that was it for me too."

Shepard grinned, her heart racing with his confession. He was trilling again and she leaned in to press her ear against his chest. The subharmonic danced with his own beating heart, the combination creating a lullaby in her head and she found herself humming along. "I love that sound," she sang softly, in time with the rhythm.

"I've never heard you sing before," he said softly, not interrupting the music he was making.

"Get used to it, Big Guy. If we're going to be parents, there will be dozens of out of tune lullabies in your future," she said, her ear still pressed to his chest.

"Out of tune? Have you heard yourself sing, Shepard? Your voice is beautiful," he confessed, drawing a flush to her cheeks. She had never liked letting people hear her sing. She felt it was like her dancing, awful and out of step. When she moved to pull away from him, he gently reached over and held her in place. "I want to hear more."

She snorted and settled in beside him. "It's your ears..." She recalled a song her mother used to sing to her at bedtime before her father started the tradition of reading the Wonderland book to her. Her father had teased her mother relentlessly about how old the song was, but she had adored hearing it. _You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray. You'll never know dear, how much I love you. So please don't take my sunshine away._ She hummed after the first verse, his warmth beside her and her own soothing melody making her eye lids droop.

"You'll have to teach me that one," he said, his voice low as he realized she was dosing off.

"Right after you teach me to cook for a Turian," she mumbled, burying her face against him.

"You have a deal," he agreed, and she fell asleep to the song in his chest.

* * *

 

The gentle noise of spraying water told her Garrus was in the shower. She opened her eyes and a soft throb in her gut reminded her of the fun she'd had the previous night. The marks he'd given her with his talons had all disappeared with the rest. She sat up, stretching out her muscles and heaved a contented sigh before crossing the bedroom to join him for a shower. He had his back to her and his skin shimmered in the dim lighting as the water cascaded down his carapace. She drank him in before sliding the shower door open and stepping in to join him, wrapping her arms around his waist and pressing her body against him. "Good morning," she hummed.

He turned in her arms and his eyes did a quick once over to be sure she had healed before he hugged her to him. "Good morning. Do you think anyone else is up?"

She pulled away from him, reaching for her loofah. "I don't know. I'm going to clean up, throw on some clothes and go make coffee. I don't know about them, but I need to clear my head. I slept surprisingly great, but I'm still a bit foggy."

"I know what you mean," he agreed, plucking the loofah from her hands and setting his hands to good use.

She hummed her appreciation, relaxing into his ministrations. "I'll put on some Kava for you."

When he'd finished cleaning her and massaging the shampoo through her hair, she brushed out the mess and rustled up some clothes for them both. Then she shuffled down to the kitchen and started a large pot of coffee and made him a cup of Kava. She handed it to him where he sat at the island watching her move through the kitchen, and they shared a short touch of foreheads. She sat down beside him, sipping her coffee and allowing the warm liquid to pool in her mouth, savoring the taste before she swallowed. His subharmonics were carefree and level, open for her to lose herself in. She could get used to mornings like this.

She chuckled as a cartoon image crossed her mind of Garrus sitting cross-legged in a lazy boy reading a newspaper in a bathrobe. "What's so funny?" he asked, his mandibles pulling away from his face and his subvocals shifting to an amused cadence.

She smiled, staring down into her coffee mug before glancing back up at him. "The picture of retirement that just crossed my mind... I'm buying you a bathrobe," she snorted.

He chuckled. "Put it on the list with that ugly Christmas sweater you promised me."

"Oh, Christmas! We forgot Christmas on the Normandy!" she gasped.

"You were a bit preoccupied with being dead, Shepard," he reminded her.

"Huh, yeah. I wasn't even out of bed until Easter..." she frowned then shrugged, sipping her coffee again as Javik shuffled into the kitchen, following the scent of coffee to the pot. "Good Morning, Javik."

"Commander," he mumbled, pouring himself a mug and standing beside the refrigerator to drink it straight black. Shepard cringed, knowing how strong she had made the pot. She hated black coffee. She opened her mouth to see if he had any news for her, but he held up a palm. "I have been forbidden from being the bearer of any news, so do not ask." Shepard sighed and set her mug on the counter in front of her to pout. Garrus chuckled and took another sip from his own mug. "Liara did ask if you might have some tea hidden in your domicile."

Shepard pushed away from the counter and stood. "Um..." She moved toward the cabinet where she kept the coffee and Kava, to shuffle through the choices. "I think Miri may have left some here... Ahha!" She pulled a small box from the shelves and shook it, confirming the presence of tea bags and then she filled the kettle and set it on the stove to boil. After she refilled her own mug, she sat back beside Garrus and the kitchen went silent again. Javik watched them both with that same impenetrable stare that he always set on people and Shepard fidgeted, tapping her nails on her coffee mug.

Finally Liara's voice broke the silence as she appeared from the back stairs. "Good morning." The kettle began to whistle noisily and Garrus grumbled.

Shepard watched her as she slowly picked out a mug from the cabinet, opened a tea bag and pulled the screaming kettle from the burner and poured her tea. When she began to bounce the tea bag up and down by it's string in the mug and leaned on the counter beside Javik, Shepard could not hold it in any longer. "You're killing me T'Soni."

Liara looked up at Shepard through her lashes and a small grin tugged at her lips. "Might I just say that both of you are incredibly sexually charged."

Garrus snorted. "Try fighting a war while Shepard is throwing pheromones at you..."

"They are very strong," Javik agreed.

"That is not the piece of news I was looking for," Shepard prodded, crossing her arms.

Liara's cheeks held a flush of purple as she continued to smile. "It worked."

Shepard jerked from her seat. "You're... we're... it worked?!" She fumbled excitedly as Garrus began to purr.

Liara nodded and Shepard bolted around the counter to take the tea from her hands and hug her tightly. "Congratulations, Commander," Javik said in his usual monotone.

Shepard pulled away from Liara and handed the tea back to her. "Sorry. Thank you..." she managed around a lump in her throat as her heart raced in her chest, like it might jump out and start dancing a jig. Garrus came up behind her and she turned to hug him too as Liara softly chuckled.

"You're crying, Shepard," Garrus said, his own voice choked as he bent his head to touch his forehead to hers.

"Am not," she stuttered, laughing as she wiped the tears from her cheeks. "Take it back..."

"And this is why Javik was not allowed to tell you. I wanted to see this for myself," Liara said softly.

"You are my favorite Asari," Shepard said through her tears, carefully hugging Liara again so she didn't spill her tea.

"I hope you know what this means to us," Garrus said, calming his keening subvocals and pulling Shepard off of Liara so she could finally take a drink of her tea.

"I do. It is why I offered in the first place. I have a unique perspective having been inside both of your minds. Your bond is... You deserve every happiness. If I can give that to you, it makes me feel worthy of your friendship, even though I haven't always been there when I should have been," Liara confessed.

"I've told you before, Liara. I never felt like you'd abandoned me..." Shepard said, taking Liara's free hand in hers.

* * *

 

Garrus could not believe it. He was going to be a father. He had watched Shepard's emotions flow over her features as Liara toyed with her before finally giving them the news they had hoped for. Her heart was racing and he saw tears dripping down her cheeks. His own soft happy keening built up in his chest until he felt he might burst. He had believed that he and Shepard would never legitimately have their own child, but now Liara was standing in front of them and assuring them that she was pregnant. The Asari were certainly fascinating creatures.

He took a moment to study Shepard as she grasped Liara's hand and assured her that she had never felt betrayed, even when Liara had chosen to take over as the Shadow Broker instead of coming along for the Collector Base like he and Tali had. Shepard was beaming, her smile bright even in the midst of the salty tears that still stained her cheeks. In all of the years he'd known her, he had never seen her smile quite that big except for the moment he had walked into the Comm Room after she'd found him on Omega. Even when they'd first gotten together, her happiness had manifested in a coy and flirtatious smirk. He lost himself in her glow, unable to take his eyes from the woman he had chosen as his mate. They had been through so much together and even through all of his awkward attempts at human romance, she had laughed and accepted him. His unshakable, indomitable Shepard. How had he gotten so lucky?

 


	47. Unforeseeable Consequences

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shepard and Garrus accept their roles on the Council and prepare to become parents.

"No," Shepard declared above the other voices in the room as they tried to ignore her. She stood up from her seat, the chair scraping noisily across the floor, drawing even more attention her way. Garrus' eyes snapped to her. At least she had someone's attention. Esheel was the next to glance her way, her coal black eyes narrowing beneath her hood. After cringing under the sound of metal against concrete, the newest member of their circle also deigned to slowly settle her light blue eyes on Shepard. She had only met Nasryna that morning, but there was something about the Asari that made her wary of calling her an ally.

The woman in question folded her hands on the table, shifting to face her body toward Shepard. She was young for a Matriarch, only 430 years old, but she was cunning and sharp. Each time Shepard glanced at her, she was reminded of Aria. Beautiful, shrewd and deadly. "Is there something you wished to add, _Councilor_?" she asked, her soft voice emphasizing the title as if Shepard had no right to be there.

"As a matter of fact, there is," Shepard growled, her palms flat on the table as she itched to call her biotics and swat the woman across the room. This was the very reason she had not wanted to accept the position. "I know all too well the devastation that the Reapers caused on Thessia. I was there on the ground as the last of the commandos that were ground-side fell. I also know that Sur'Kesh took a beating from both Cerberus and the Reapers. Hell, the first time I laid eyes on Palaven, it was on fire..." She sighed and lifted her hands from the table to stand with them clasped behind her back, the stance likely looking a little bit silly in the pink and purple floor length dress. "Earth is no different. That does not mean that we are going to allocate resources and give priority to any of these planets. The council is in place to protect the entire galaxy, not our own asses."

"We have had this argument before," Esheel said carefully, her voice ringing like a very annoying and repetitive bell. "If you are going to bring up the Krogan..."

"And why not?" Garrus asked, inserting himself into the conversation. "The Krogan saved Palaven."

"And what about the Quarians, and the Geth?" Shepard pushed. "Everyone deserves a voice."

Nasryna sighed. "Are you going to invite the Rachni as well?"

Shepard crossed her arms. "If I thought they gave a crap, yes, I would. The Queen helped us build the Crucible and now she has made it clear that she plans to disappear."

"You say these other races wish for a seat on the council, but none of them has bothered to show up here," Esheel said snidely.

"I have sent word to both Tuchanka and Rannoch. The remaining species have also received word of the progress achieved in rebuilding the Citadel. The Batarian Hegemony and the Vol Protectorate among them. I have personally extended Council invitations to each and every race that lent aid in any way to the war effort," Shepard announced.

"You can't do that!" Esheel protested as Nasryna's lips parted in an impressed smile.

"You surprise me, Shepard," Nasryna said with a tip of her head. "I was told you would be a thorn in our side, but I was not expecting one quite so large."

"You think I'm bad, ask Aria how big a pain in the ass the Big Guy can be," Shepard smirked, dropping Aria's name and nodding her head toward Garrus who sat back in his chair, his mandibles tucked closely to his cheeks. It was amazing how much sway the Queen of Omega had within the Asari government considering she was little more than a thug. "Look. I'm not trying to butt heads. The exact opposite in fact. I'm trying to unite the galaxy in a time of peace. Why should war be the only reason we have so many allies?"

"Aside from the Volus, Quarians and Krogan, none of the invited races have shown an interest in anything more than what they already have... an embassy on the Citadel and an ambassador," Garrus pointed out. "I really don't see the issue in allowing the others a say."

She and him had poured over the responses from every race the night before. They both had all of the facts and opinions, now was the time to get things moving. She had been surprised by the negative response from the Geth, but the 'higher order runtimes' had decided that the Quarians could speak for them instead of adding a Geth to the council. The other responses had been expected. Nasryna glanced thoughtfully between both Shepard and Garrus, the smile still on her lips. "Do you truly believe that these younger races deserve this honor?"

"Humanity are the newcomers in this galaxy, Councilor. We were given a seat on the council after this war began because we showed our value when we defeated Sovereign. Each of the races that wish for a place have done no less," Shepard said carefully.

After what felt like decades passed as the other two councilors both attempted to stare her down, Nasryna finally nodded in defeat. "It seems we were outplayed, Esheel. You have my vote, Councilor."

Shepard resumed her seat. "I will send out the formal invitations as soon as we are finished here. That way we can get the ball rolling and the Councilors can be selected..." She shuffled through the datapads on the table in front of her and picked up the one she was hunting for. "There is also the issue of the SPECTRES that survived the war. We should bring them all in and get formal debriefs before getting them back out in the field."

Esheel grunted. "I agree. I have been receiving scattered reports from several of our operatives."

"It should be easy enough to send out a flash message now that the QECs have been reestablished. We'll need a headcount," Shepard said flicking her finger upwards on the datapad to scroll over the list of names she'd already been able to confirm were alive. She was glad to see that Jondam Bau was among them.

"Perhaps we should set a date to have them all report in," Nasryna suggested. "Perhaps a Galactic Standard Month?"

"That should give them all enough time to secure passage from any point in the Galaxy," Garrus hummed in agreement.

Shepard glanced around the table in wonder. The meeting was going better than planned. "I know of one that is already on the Citadel. Major Kaidan Alenko is currently helping oversee the rebuilding of C-Sec. We have established a recruitment center under the watch of a decorated former officer, Castis Vakarian."

Nasryna's brows lifted and she glanced at Esheel. "It seems as if Councilor Shepard has been very busy. What exactly have you been doing since the war, Esheel?"

"Arguing against allowing the Krogan a few planets to rebuild on..." Garrus mumbled.

Shepard swallowed her bark of laughter and cleared her throat. "At any rate, it is up to each race and their governments to come to us with whatever request for aid they may require. For now we should focus on keeping momentum going on the Citadel."

"We're seeing more and more ships flocking in from all over every day looking for a haven," Garrus pointed out. "We should find a way to recruit from the masses and get this station cleaned up. The Keepers will only do so much. The rest is up to us."

"I suggest the advertisement Kiosks on the Wards," Shepard said when no one else spoke up with a plan. "Individual businesses have already begun to rebuild themselves, if their staff survived, but public buildings such as C-Sec HQ and many of the living quarters throughout the Wards are still struggling. It's also clogging up the docks without representatives to provide clearance. The best way to rebuild is to slap recruitment messages wherever there are people. And there are definitely people on the Wards."

"That is a solid plan," Nasryna agreed. "I will have some of the techs I brought with me make that happen."

"Thank you," Shepard said, rethinking her initial mistrust of Nasryna. She seemed to be responding to Shepard's take charge attitude, whereas Esheel was stewing in her own juices across the table. "Does anyone else have any concerns to bring to the table?"

"If we are to be accepting new members in time, perhaps we should leave any other concerns for when they arrive," Nasryna suggested.

"Agreed," Shepard said with a nod.

A sense of accomplishment fell over her as the room began to empty. Esheel left first, muttering under her breath and Nasryna shook both hers and Garrus' hands, expressing what a pleasure it was to meet them both before gliding from the room herself. Her shoulders slumped in relief as Garrus rounded the table to help her collect her piles of datapads. "That went better than expected," he rumbled as they exited the room and she headed for her new office, Anderson and Udina's former office.

She snorted. "I thought for sure that I was going to be as ignored as Anderson was when he accepted the position."

"You're kind of hard to ignore, Shepard," he said teasingly.

"Isn't that how we won the war? Be as bullheaded and loud as possible until someone pays attention?" she asked with a chuckle.

The door slid open and she stepped inside as he joined her chuckle. "The galaxy needs more politicians like you."

"I think I was just insulted," she said dropping her pile of datapads on the desk. "So... I've got some messages to write, then... dinner?"

He cocked his head and set the few datapads in his arms down beside hers. "I think I can spare a few hours for the mother of my child..." His hand found her shoulder and he traced a talon down the fabric of her dress.

"Oh, I see how it is. Liara gets pregnant and suddenly you'd rather have dinner with her," she teased.

He snorted. "I'll see you at seven?"

"Pick me up here?" she asked.

"Of course," he said and leaned in to touch his forehead to hers briefly before leaving her to get some work done.

* * *

 

Within two days of her message being sent out, Shepard was standing at the docks awaiting the small armada of ships that bore the newest Councilor. The Volus had been quick to respond, the species having been bitter for quite some time at the lack of a council seat. She was again dressed in a floor length dress, this time in a light green, accented with Vakarian blue. It seemed that sitting on the Citadel Council was determined to soften her wardrobe. She missed her armor. The dress felt too light and left her undeniably exposed. She fiddled with her omnitool, erecting a shield up around herself. Settling into the small protective layer, she felt much better. In spite of her efforts for the galaxy, the threatening emails continued to pour in. Traynor attempted to shuffle them out of Shepard's reach, but some still slipped through.

The small frigates that pulled up along the bay resembled Turian designed ships that had been sized down to accommodate the much smaller aliens. The docking clamps hissed as they attached to the wings and Shepard smoothed down the front of her dress and quickly ran her fingers through her hair. When the group of Volus exited the ship, the one in charge was easy to pick out due to the tailored tuxedo jacket he wore over his exosuit. Shepard glanced away momentarily to get a hold of the howl or laughter threatening to bubble to the surface. She silently thanked whoever was listening that Garrus had not decided to accompany her to pick up the new councilor. If he had made any sound in his subharmonics, she would have lost it. Another of his entourage scurried ahead of him and placed a step up a few feet in front of Shepard. The jacketed Volus waddled up to the step and proceeded to place himself on top of it, making their height difference no less noticeable. _Hiss_ "Commander Shepard..." _Hiss_ "A pleasure to..." _Hiss_ "Finally meet you in person." The Volus held his hand upwards in a show of formality to shake her hand.

"Dornu Hul?" Shepard asked, taking his small hand in hers and shaking it quickly, bending her knees to make up for the difference in height and attempting to use her skirt to hide it.

"Indeed..." _Hiss_ "The Vol Protectorate..." _Hiss_ "Has asked me to take..." _Hiss_ "On the role as their..." _Hiss_ "voice..." _Hiss_ "On the council." He announced importantly, puffing his rounded chest out as his suit hissed incessantly.

"Welcome. We're expecting the Krogan Councilor within a few days and the Quarian within the week. In the meantime, I can get you set up in your office. Do you have accommodations here on the Citadel, or would you like me to arrange housing for you?" Shepard said formally, already having handled everything just in case.

"If you could... show me to my... office... please, I... would... like very much to... take a look at the... financial state... of the Council," he requested, Shepard resisting the urge to roll her eyes in lieu of the time it took for him to spit out the jumble of words. "I believe... the Vol-Clan will be... of great assistance... in managing... the treasury."

Shepard had already been pouring over the logistics and finances of rebuilding, so that she could have a handle on things herself, but if Dornu wanted to manage the books, who was she to say no? Volus were known for their bankers and merchants after all. "Of course." She turned to head for the elevator and could hear the shuffling behind her as Dornu hopped off the step and his carrier picked it up and folded it with a click and beep of tech. Shepard resisted the urge to chuckle once again and then nearly lost it as she wondered if he was going to bring a booster seat to the council meetings. "We have secured a small nook on the Presidium where a few of the offices survived the Crucible. We've set everyone up with their own temporary space until Nasryna can get enough people recruited to commence proper rebuilding of certain structures," Shepard explained as they stuffed themselves in the elevator, her alone with her shields and him with his entourage of short round go-fors.

"The accommodations are... appreciated, Earth-Clan," Dornu said. As the elevator doors closed them in, Shepard was assaulted with the incessant hissing of several Volus environment suits. She tried her best to block it out as the elevator crept up the Presidium. She rolled her shoulders, and sighed softly, wondering how long it might take for Dornu to get bored of his superiority complex and loose the tuxedo jacket. If he showed up to a council meeting with it on, she was quitting. Damn the Universe.

After dropping him off at his office and swiping her omnitool data to him so he could reach her if need be, she closed him in and swallowed her amusement for the short walk it would take for her to get to Garrus' office. She slipped in the door, closing it behind her as he looked up from his laptop and offered her a grin. "So, how did it go?" he rumbled, leaning back slightly in his chair.

She finally released her mirth in a snort and fell backwards into the wall, leaning heavily on it as she howled with laughter. "He showed up... in an honest to goodness tuxedo, Garrus... and... stood on a six inch step to shake my hand... I can't..." Her breath came almost as ragged as the volus himself as she explained in between holding her arms over her stomach and laughing uncontrollably.

"I almost wish I'd come with you," he purred, one mandible pulling from his face in amusement.

"Oh, God I don't... I never would have been able to control myself. I swear," she panted, wiping a tear from the corner of her eye. "I would have laughed right in his face."

Garrus shrugged. "You would have needed to bend down first, Shepard." Then he nonchalantly went back to his work, his subharmonics chuckling.

"You bastard!" she managed before the laughter surfaced again.

* * *

 

The Krogan Councilor's arrival was much less amusing. Wrex had failed to inform her of who he was sending and she waited anxiously at the docks, her shield in place again and Garrus at her back this time. A single shuttle arrived, carrying a single Krogan and Shepard did not recognize the face at first. The large woman approached her and Garrus and a grin lifted the corners of her lips. "Commander. It is very good to see you again."

"Bakara?" Shepard gasped as the voice was unmistakable. She had swapped out her Shaman garb for a simple dress, cinched at the waist. Her head was bare and her eyes sparkled with happiness. "Wrex sent _you_?"

The woman chuckled. "Of course he did. It was either me or another female of breeding age. I've already given him two children, so I volunteered. As if the men on Tuchanka know how to speak for our race."

Shepard snorted and reached out for a handshake, "You can say that again. I'm glad you're here."

Bakara took her hand and squeezed it lightly. "The Krogan owe you a debt twice over, Commander. I intend to find a way to repay it. Because of you, I am a mother." Then her eyes fell on Garrus. "It is good to see you too."

Garrus hummed. "I'm glad to see Wrex has some sense after all," he replied with a chuckle as she reached out to shake his hand as well.

"Don't tell him that," Bakara said with a grin.

"I wanted to give you a fair warning," Shepard said as they began to walk toward the elevators. "Councilor Esheel is none too pleased with the Krogan gaining a seat on the council."

"One Salarian will not cow me, Commander. Wrex has it on good authority that it is only her and a handful of dalatrasses that oppose the idea. The Salarian military would rather allow you to take the reigns of the council. On recommendation from one Major Kirrahe," Bakara revealed.

Shepard frowned, and Garrus' subvocals hummed. "If Liara is feeding that information to Wrex, why isn't she telling us?" he wondered, practically reading Shepard's mind.

"I'm not taking the reigns of anything," Shepard sighed, slamming her palm down on the elevator button. "I saved the galaxy for them, now I'm setting it right. That's all."

"A great deal has always been heaped on your shoulders. I am here to do my best to alleviate some of the weight," Bakara assured her. "I can lift quite a bit."

Shepard smiled. "It's appreciated, but I'm certain you'll have enough burdens of your own once the council is ready to convene again."

Bakara shrugged loosely. "As I said. I can lift a lot."

"So where is your family?" Shepard asked, with curiosity, deliberately changing the subject.

Bakara chuckled. "Do not worry. I have not left the young ones with Wrex. All of the children being born at the moment are being raised communally. It is much easier to keep an eye on the population. I have imposed restrictions under Wrex's name. No female is allowed more than five children every ten years. We nearly bred ourselves to extinction before. I do not plan to allow the same to occur again. Wrex has grudgingly agreed."

"Grudgingly?" Shepard asked with a rise in her brow.

"You know Wrex. With all of his talk, he sometimes forgets what he should be doing in favor of what he wishes he could do. But he always makes the right decision in the end," Bakara waved her hand.

"If he doesn't, you put him in his place?" Garrus guessed with an inner chuckle.

"Rightly," Bakara said as Shepard paused outside the office they had made up for the Krogan.

"Well, this is it. It's not much for now, but we've only just started getting things back in order," Shepard said apologetically.

"I'm sure it will be more than sufficient. Thank you again, Commander."

"If you need anything, I'm right down the hall, but Esheel is next door," Shepard said with a wink.

Bakara laughed loudly as she entered the office, the door swishing softly. "I think I will find several pictures to hang with nails."

* * *

 

The Quarian councilor, Shepard did not meet until three days after his arrival when the Council was scheduled to have their first meeting. He had gotten a suit puncture while making a repair to his ship and some foreign germs had given him a mild fever. This simple thing gave Shepard one clue as to the man's personality. He had not allowed a geth into his suit. The realization made Shepard a little nervous about what kind of spokesman for the geth he would be if he did not trust them. Andel'Valen vas Rannoch was the last to arrive around the table and Shepard's eyes narrowed as he sat pointedly away from the group who had huddled near one end of the table. Shepard was tempted to take a page from King Arthur and negate the table ends all together. "Ok, now that we're all here, I think introductions should be made," Shepard began.

Dornu bobbed his neckless head in agreement, his suit hissing noisily. "Yes... I think it is best... that we become acquainted... I've been in my office... for... over a week and I... have only met... two of my fellow councilors." After her description, Garrus had made a point to get a look for himself and returned to her with a gleeful grin on his face, saying that Dornu had taken one look at him and shooed away his stool in favor of remaining seated in his cranked up anti-gravity chair. Shepard was more than mildly amused to see that he had ridden the floating monstrosity into the meeting as well.

"Why don't you get the ball rolling then, Dornu," Shepard offered, regretting saying the word ball as it made her picture Dornu bouncing along a beach in a rainbow colored exosuit.

"I am Dornu Hul... I worked... previously in close relations with the... deceased Volus ambassador," he said proudly.

"Everyone has met me, except of course for our new Quarian friend," Shepard said. "Former Systems Alliance Commander, former SPECTRE, other credentials unnecessary, Councilor Ann Shepard."

"My name is Nasryna T'Vren. Matriarch of Thessia, and long ago Eclipse Sister. A time I am not proud of," the Asari confessed, reminding Shepard exactly why she had found the woman worthy of suspicion.

All eyes moved to Garrus and he cleared his throat, sitting forward. "Oh, is it my turn? Right. Garrus Vakarian, former Turian military turned C-Sec, turned vigilante, turned Reaper Advisor... etcetra," he flapped his hand dismissively. "No one needs to know all of that."

"I am Urdnot Bakara. Former Shaman of the female clans, now consort to clan Chief Urdnot Wrex, and survivor of the Genophage," she said evenly as her eyes narrowed and flicked briefly toward Esheel.

"Andel'Valen vas Rannoch, formerly I served on the now defunct Migrant Fleet Conclave. My position on this council is supposedly temporary until our Admirals can convince their fellow Admiral Tali'Zorah vas Normandy to replace me."

Shepard balked. Had it been that long since she had talked to Tali that she hadn't been told about this? Although his presence made more sense. Garrus' subvocals erupted in confusion. Apparently she hadn't been the only one who wasn't told. "Another Councilor in Shepard's pocket," Esheel sneered.

"I assure you, Councilor Esheel that I had no idea that the Quarians had even considered Tali as one of their choices," Shepard said calmly as her stomach flipped. She hadn't intended for this meeting to go this way.

"Of course we did," Andel said snidely. "She is the only one of us that is quite so well versed in so many other cultures. Including the Geth."

Shepard took up the data pad in front of her to jot down a note to speak to Tali as soon as she got a chance. "Okay... Esheel, you are the only one not introduced," Shepard said trying to turn the conversation.

"What does it matter? I'm certain you would have me replaced as well if you could," the Salarian barked.

Shepard's eyes narrowed and she felt her biotics slip unbidden from her palms. She reigned in the unintentional outburst as Garrus' subharmonics fluttered with concern. "You were present, Councilor, when I was originally invited to serve on the Citadel. I believe I turned down the Primarch several times before I finally agreed for the good of the galaxy when I realized he was not going to give up asking. Did I not?" When Esheel didn't respond, Shepard grunted in frustration as the woman refused to meet her gaze. "I am not a threat to anyone on this Council, or their position. We were each chosen by our own race to speak as their voice. I'm sorry if you can't accept that..."

"Shepard has more than proven that she belongs here," Nasryna said shortly as her own eyes narrowed at Esheel. "I am also fairly certain that she played a very significant role in saving your life." When the Salarian's mouth fell open, Nasryna chuckled. "What? Did you think I joined this Council before reading the files of all my fellow councilors? I may not be Salarian, Esheel, but I am not stupid."

"If we can come together and work as a unified voice, I believe we can make everyone happy, here," Bakara said, her voice rising above the other more soft spoken females in the room.

"I agree," Dornu hissed.

"At least some of us do," Garrus sighed, his eyes still fixed on Shepard as she gathered her temper.

Shepard drew her hands down into her lap so she could work on unclenching her fists as she spoke. "We came here today for a short meet and greet and debrief on our current activities and Esheel has decided to turn it into a pissing contest... Does anyone else have anything to add?"

Garrus cleared his throat. "Our latest reports from C-Sec are showing increasing numbers in recruits as well as several officers that have found their way back onto the Citadel, Commander Bailey included. I just received word of that an hour ago."

Shepard's fingers tapped over her datapad, noting the need to get over and talk with Bailey and Garrus' dad. "Good. Where are we on hiring construction workers?"

"Nasryna's techs have... gotten the word out, but... we may not be in... the best state to pay workers much... for their efforts," Dornu confessed.

Shepard nodded. "I had seen those numbers myself. Any suggestions?"

"A charity ball..." Nasryna shrugged. "There are always rich idiots that want to soothe their consciences by throwing credits at the less fortunate. Dress it up as rebuilding the universe, promise a visit from the great Commander Shepard, and the galaxy will be lining up."

Shepard buried her face in her hands and groaned. "Defeat the Reapers _one time_ and you become the poster child for the Universe."

"You did a little more than just defeat the Reapers, Shepard," Garrus reminded her.

She sighed and sat back. "How soon can we do this?"

"With Elijah Khan dead, the Silver Coast Casino is still shut down. If we can get the codes for the doors, We could clean up the place and get the invitations out within a week," Nasryna shrugged.

"I don't need the codes. I've got their security files on record," Shepard admitted. When eyes fell on her from all around and Garrus started to chuckle in his chest, she shrugged. "I had to break into his panic room. It's a long story. I don't wanna talk about it."

"You know, I have contacts, but I'm sure your friend Liara has a lot more," Nasryna said knowingly.

With a sigh, Shepard made another note on her datapad and saw her schedule piling up. "Okay, we are still waiting for reports from all of our active SPECTREs," she said, scrolling through her agenda list. "Andel, how are the Quarian's settling in with the Geth on Rannoch?"

He sat forward, folding his hands on the table. "After you killed the Reaper, the Geth assisted in dismantling and removing the corpse from the surface. All of our fleet has returned since the Relays were repaired and we are quickly cannibalizing the liveships to rebuild infrastructure on Rannoch."

"Is there anything the Council can do to make the transition easier for you?" Shepard asked.

He shook his head, his helmet catching some light and flaring brightly. "No. The Quarians were prepared for this to take some time, but the Geth have made the process significantly faster."

"I've seen the Geth at work in a Quarian's suit. You can't argue with results," Shepard agreed.

"So it would seem," he said as if the admission might choke him.

"Okay, I also wanted to address Krogan expansion..." Esheel grunted and crossed her arms and Shepard glared at her before glancing at Bakara. "Were there any planetary deeds granted to Wrex as of yet?"

"Not yet, Commander," Bakara said, making it a point to continue to use her military title. "Wrex has put in a bid for three uninhabited planets just outside the Krogan DMZ, but the Council has outright refused at every turn."

"That was the old council..." Shepard looked around the room. "Opinions?"

"Bakara, you've told us a little bit about your restrictions on population..." Garrus said, likely hoping to glean sympathy for the Krogan. "Perhaps you could share with the rest of the Council?"

Bakara gave a short nod. "Tuchanka is currently home to approximately 1 billion females of breeding age. I have set up numerous communes where these females can come to donate themselves to rebuilding the population. However, I have restricted each female to only five children every ten years. The Krogan understand that we cannot make the same mistakes of the Ancients."

"A worthy goal," Nasryna said thoughtfully.

"And the requested planets... are proven.... unpopulated?" Dornu asked.

"As far as my notes tell me," Shepard said, shuffling her datapads and finding the one with Wrex's request and the research from Liara on the worlds.

"Then I see no problem with allowing the Krogan a place to rebuild," Nasryna said.

"They already have Tuchanka," Esheel argued.

Garrus cleared his throat. "Tuchanka is no place to rebuild, as much as the Krogan love it. I've been there."

"The Shroud was slowly bringing life back to the planet, but it was destroyed in the efforts to cure the Genophage," Shepard pointed out. "The Krogan deserve better."

"I say, we put it to a vote," Dornu said.

"Agreed. All in favor of granting the Krogan the requested planets..." Shepard held up an arm, palm facing forward in her show of favor. The rest of the hands in the room all raised except for Esheel and Andel. She was beginning to see the Quarian as more of a decoration than actually useful. She definitely needed to talk to Tali. "Done. I'll have the paperwork drawn up and sent to Wrex."

"Thank you," Bakara said with a short sigh of relief.

"Now that that's handled, I'd like to focus our efforts on getting the Embassies back on their feet. Many of the smaller species are going to need a lot of support. I can..." Shepard was cut off by a low grumble from Garrus' throat.

" _I_ will send out the the expected dates that the Presidium will be completed to the Ambassadors so they will know when they can move back in. I'll be sure they are ready for an audience with the Council so they can come to us with any concerns," he said with a marked look that told her she was shouldering too much.

"Thank you, Garrus," she said with a grateful smile. "Now, is there anything else we should handle?" The table went silent and Shepard breathed out her held breath. "Okay. I'll get started on some of this right away. Nasryna, I'll have those codes sent to you for the casino so you can get some people in there to assess the damage."

"Thank you, Shepard," The Asari said with a tip of her head as she stood from her seat. Dornu began to hover toward the door and Esheel stormed out.

Shepard sighed, leaning her forehead on her fingertips and rubbing at a headache in her temples as the rest filtered out. "I don't know how Liara does it..." she said softly as she was left with only Garrus who watched her carefully. "Fielding so much... I've never felt more busy, yet more lazy in my life. I need something to shoot."

His chuckle vibrated over her skin as he stood. "What you need is a night off. You're swimming in Data Pads, Shepard."

She let out a short bark of laughter. "Yeah, sound familiar? It's like coordinating the war, only I have to hold everyone's hand, lest their feelings get hurt. Now I have to dance like a puppet to scam credits. Might as well stick me on a pole on Omega..."

"As much as I would love to see that, Shepard, everyone knows you can't dance without a partner... I saw you making a ton of notes over here..." he picked up one of her datapads and began to skim over her notes. "Let me go talk to Dad and Bailey. I know C-Sec a little better... Then..." he leaned down to put his face next to hers, his weight tipping her chair backwards a bit so she was leaning into him. "I think you should invite everyone to the apartment for a get together. I'll get some little pink balloons and we can celebrate our news. We haven't even had a chance to tell anyone yet."

"If you insist... I'll see if Liara is up for it," she said, tipping her head so she could kiss his mandible. "First, I'm going to get those deeds sent over to Wrex."

He tipped her chin back with a talon and kissed her lips. "I'll be waiting to hear from you."

* * *

 

Shepard sat across from Tali as the Quarian wrung her hands together with nerves. "I told you when they made me an Admiral, Shepard. It was mostly a formality. I can't speak for the Quarians..."

"And why not?" Shepard asked gently, wondering why Tali had such little faith in herself and then slowly realizing how hypocritical she was being. She shook her head and held up a hand to stop Tali before she could respond. "My real question is, why didn't you come to me?"

Tali hung her head. "I guess I just didn't want to add to your problems. You and Garrus have been very busy."

"I'm never too busy for my friends, Tali," Shepard said, her hand landing on Tali's shoulder. "Talk to me." She squeezed her hand briefly to draw Tali's eyes back to her from the floor.

A mechanical sigh came through her helmet and Tali said, "I just don't know if I should be making decisions for the entire Quarian race. Or for the Geth... I'm barely an adult, Shepard."

"Look... I hate to say it, but someone needs to be making those decisions. Andel is about as useful as tits on a bull," Shepard said with a grunt.

Tali's eyes flashed back up from where they had wandered to the floor again. "Did you say Andel? As in Andel'Valen vas Eidolo?"

"He was listed as vas Rannoch, but yeah. Why? Do you know him?" Shepard asked.

Tali's glowing eyes narrowed to slits and her hands stopped fidgeting to ball into fists. "I can't believe Raan sent that bosh'tet!"

"That struck a nerve. Who is he?" Shepard asked as Tali jostled her hand from her shoulder to begin a furious pacing back and forth across the Normandy's mess hall.

"An idiot, for starters. He was one of the first of the Conclave to vote for wiping out the Geth. He's a traditionalist who likes to find a way to bring up the fact that he can trace his ancestors back to those who fought against the Geth before we were driven from Rannoch. That Raan sent him is an obvious trap. She is boxing me in," Tali sighed. "Keelah, Shepard."

"She's playing you like the Primarch played me and Garrus," Shepard sighed, slumping in her chair. "You're being forced to accept the position or let a bigot speak for your people."

"Exactly," Tali agreed. A string of more Quarian curses slipped from Tali's mouth before she stopped pacing and put a hand on her hip. "Reegar is going to be pleased," she said sarcastically.

"I remember he hated politics as much as I do," Shepard said with a roll of her eyes.

Tali's free hand made it up to rub over her helmet like she wanted to pinch the bridge of her nose. "Give me a few days, and I will see what I can do. If I can't talk sense into Raan, I suppose I'll have to join you and Garrus."

"Maybe we can get Esheel's head to explode," Shepard said with mock excitement.

Tali chuckled softly. "The things we do for our people..."

"Oh, one last thing... Garrus is insisting I take the night off, so we are throwing a little get together at the apartment. Can I expect to see you there?" Shepard asked as she stood, still needing to talk to Liara.

"Wouldn't miss it," Tali agreed, her tone indicating a smile under the helmet.

Shepard smiled in return and headed for Liara's quarters as Tali made a beeline for the elevator. Liara's unlocked door swished open and she found the Asari pouring over a console near the back of her room. Liara was so focused on whatever she was doing, she obviously hadn't heard Shepard enter. "Good Day, Commander Shepard," Glyph intoned pleasantly as the drone shimmered into existence before her. A soft clatter made Shepard lean out around the VI shell and glance at Liara whose cheeks had flushed purple and she was picking up a datapad from the floor.

"Hi Glyph," Shepard said with a chuckle. "Liara, how are you?"

"A bit scatterbrained if I'm being honest," she replied, setting the datapad back on the desk and then finally looking up at Shepard. "Juggling the DNA of several species over the last month has been... distracting."

"Is it that bad?" Shepard pulled a chair up and sat backwards in it, her legs straddling the back as she watched Liara closely.

Liara smiled. "It is not bad... I simply have... what is it humans call it...? Pregnancy brain?"

Shepard snorted. "Yeah and only eleven more months to go..."

"It is worth the distraction. Did you need me for something?" Liara asked.

Shepard crossed her arms over each other, resting them on the back of the chair and leaned her chin on her forearms. "We had a very interesting Council meeting this morning. Nasryna seems to know who you are."

"Yes," Liara agreed. "I let it slip to a few key people."

"That's your business. At any rate, we thought it might be wise to ask you for a favor. The Council needs credits and Nasryna suggested the best way to go about it would be a charity ball at the Silver Coast Casino. Do you have any connections that might help build us a guest list?" Shepard asked.

"Of course... Glyph..." she said.

"I will begin to contact some of our more wealthy agents, Dr. T'Soni," Glyph intoned and flickered out of existence to appear again beside one of her consoles and begin flashing red as it worked.

"From the look on your face, I'm assuming that Nasryna also volunteered you to be the guest of honor," Liara guessed.

"That's accurate," Shepard said with a sigh, stuffing her hands into her hoodie pockets after lifting her head and slumping her shoulders.

"I will have that detail added to the invitations," Liara said with a smirk. "Anything else?"

Shepard bit her lip. "If you're ready, Garrus and I are having a little get together tonight to unwind and he suggested if we had everyone together, we might as well use it to make our announcement. I told him to hold off until I got your permission."

Liara smiled sweetly. "This is your pregnancy, Shepard. You make the decisions."

"Yeah but it's your belly getting rubbed," Shepard shrugged. "I thought it only fair to ask you first."

"I'll be there," Liara chuckled.

* * *

 

Shepard had hurried home after sending out a quick invite to the apartment to those she hadn't spoken to. Her omnitool chirped every few minutes as she and Garrus set to work getting the apartment in order to have guests. "What did Liara say?" he asked as she gathered some ingredients in the kitchen to bake a cake and he gathered some of the clothes she had left lying around.

"She seems ready to make the announcement... told me it was my call," she said carefully measuring out the flour, salt and baking powder. She hadn't baked a cake in ages, so she was being cautious.

"Good, because I may have invited Dad when I saw him today," he admitted sheepishly, leaning around the corner from the stairwell closest to the front door.

Shepard bit her lip setting the dry ingredients to the side and measuring out the sugar and mixing it with the butter. "Are we ready to tell your dad?"

Garrus fully appeared in the archway, momentarily framed as he passed into the kitchen to sit across the counter from her as she slowly stirred the eggs into the mix, distracted by the conversation. "He's going to find out sooner or later. I figure if we do it in an apartment full of people, he'll be less likely to loose it."

"He has just come around to accepting me into the family, he may not be very pleased that his first grandchild will be Asari," she sighed, looking down into the bowl and making certain the consistency was right before adding in the dry bowl.

Garrus chuckled. "I don't think that will be of as much concern to him as the particular Asari that we've 'mated' with. The Shadow Broker is not a very popular figure among C-Sec."

"Does your father know about that?" she asked, dipping a finger in the batter to take a taste.

"I honestly don't know who exactly knows Liara's identity," Garrus said with a shrug. "Don't worry about Dad. Sol will be here to serve as a defensive layer. It seemed like you two got along pretty well."

Shepard smirked. "I like your sister. You two must have both inherited your sense of humor from your mom." She continued stirring her batter, working the small lumps of flour out.

His mandibles pulled away from his face in a large grin. "Definitely... So what are you making?" He asked, watching her work, the milk and vanilla finding their way into the bowl as they talked.

She shrugged. "Pregnancy announcements usually come with cake... I was gonna get this one started and then try my hand at a turian recipe I found on the extranet." She set the bowl down and activated the data pad where she had stored the recipe, spinning it on the counter for him to peruse.

"Where did you manage to get some of these ingredients?" he asked with curiosity, his mandibles relaxing as he studied the recipe before returning his gaze to her as she resumed her stirring.

"I am a SPECTRE, remember... I've got connections," she smirked, deciding the batter was done and sliding her already greased baking pans closer. She carefully poured the batter evenly and jiggled the pans to help it settle before popping them in the oven and starting on the buttercream frosting. He watched her with fascination as she remembered the recipes from the deep recesses of her mind without help from the extranet. He was purring softly as she worked and she found her new habit of humming along with him surfacing as she sifted the powdered sugar. Pausing her humming, she looked up at him and grinned. "Shouldn't you be cleaning up?"

"Right," he said, jerking out of his trance and clearing his throat, his mandibles flicking. "Can't have a party in a messy apartment."

While he tidied up, she set to work on the dextro cake recipe after carefully cleaning up all of the levo ingredients so she couldn't make a mistake, following it to the letter and asking him to taste the batter before she baked it. From the grin on his face, she had done something right and she did a small celebratory dance as he laughed at her. Once both cakes were cooling on the counter, she moved into the living room to sit down on the couch while she waited. He brought her a beer and sat beside her with a satisfied hum. "So how should we do it?" she asked, nudging his leg with hers.

"Quickly... we have guests coming in a few hours," he teased, knowing exactly what she meant. She snorted and sipped her beer. "I don't know, Shepard. I've never done this sort of thing before."

"We should have gotten those pink balloons you were talking about," she lamented, leaning to rest her head on his shoulder.

He hummed his agreement. "The engagement party was much easier. We didn't have to do a damned thing." He picked up her hand to admire the ring again. She had to admit it looked great with her freshly painted nails.

Her omnitool chirped softly and he released her hand so she could call up the message. She sat forward abruptly as she scanned the message. "It's from Samara!"

"She finally responded?" he asked, leaning forward to set his drink down on the table.

"I was starting to get worried," she said with a deep sigh of relief. She read over the message and smiled. "She says she would be honored to assist with the joining and she needs to tie up only a few more loose ends with Falere before she can make it. A few months tops."

He leaned over and kissed her cheek, his mandibles fluttering over her skin. "That's more good news for us."

* * *

 

They settled for a simple cloaked message above the fireplace that could be revealed with a tap of her omnitool. As the guests filtered in, Shepard fidgeted anxiously under the gaze of Garrus' father. It was like he could tell something was up. The man was far too observant. Once everyone had gotten in the door and was catching up quietly, Shepard cleared her throat. "All right, everyone gather 'round!"

"What gives, Lola? You getting the picture before we're all completely borracho this time?" James asked with a grin as everyone exchanged glances and made their way to the living room.

She pursed her lips and crossed her arms as Garrus chuckled, sidling up beside her. "No..." Once she had everyone's attention, she cleared her throat again. "Now, I know you all are under the impression that this was just a night off to have a good time, but there is something else first..."

"Oh, no... who's dying this time?" Tali asked teasingly.

Shepard sighed and pushed forward. "No one is dying, Tali... Garrus and I... wanted everyone together so we could confess something."

His arm snaked around her shoulder as she pulled up the program on her omnitool that would light the banner. "With the help of a very dear friend..." he waved his hand so Liara could join them. The Asari's cheeks flushed purple as she stepped up to stand on his other side.

Shepard tapped the button and the banner lit above them. "Ta da!" she said as the words, 'It's a blue girl', flashed to a small tune.

"Oh, Shepard, really?" Liara said as she read the words, the chastising in her voice overrun by the small chuckle that escaped her lips.

"You were being so serious!" Tali gasped, jumping up from where she had sat down beside Reegar on the couch. "Keelah!"

"If Shepard was the doner, please tell me there were cameras hidden in the room," Joker said with a chuckle as Tali threw herself at them, falling between the three of them and attempting to hug them all at once.

The news seemed to hit like a wave as everyone puzzled out the meaning of the sign at their own pace. "You've got to be shitting me!" Jack nearly shouted, just as she had when she figured out the ring on Shepard's finger. "That's the biggest 'fuck you' to biology that I've seen since the Cheerleader's bubble butt. Congrats."

"How very eloquent, Jack," Garrus chuckled as Solana approached her brother and then after eyeing him warily punched his shoulder before pulling him into a hug.

"Bite me, Garrus!" Jack replied, only halfheartedly as Miranda crossed her arms and rolled her eyes.

"I would, but I don't want ink poisoning," he teased back, rubbing his arm where Sol had pegged him.

Shepard found herself swept up by a teary eyed Dr. Chakwas as Kaidan nudged Jacob and said, "They told me before they did it."

"Seriously... is there video?" Joker said as he approached Shepard and hugged her, too. Shepard snorted as he pulled away and patted her shoulder.

"Jeff!" EDI scolded as she took his place. "Congratulations, Shepard."

Garrus was receiving his own line of well wishers as Liara fielded her own hugs. Shepard looked through the crowd as she continued to get a mix of hugs and shoulder pats and loud congratulations. Castis Vakarian stood near the glass wall that separated the garden under the stairs from the rest of the room, his arms crossed and his eyes narrow. His mandibles were pulled against his cheeks and she wished she could hear his subharmonics to get an idea of what the expression was conveying. Her sight was interrupted by Bakara who stepped up to her with a smile on her face. "Congratulations, Commander."

Shepard scoffed. "You know you don't have to call me that," she said as the woman's large hand fell on her shoulder.

"It is simply a habit," she said, tipping her head, the warm smile still curling her lips up on both ends. "Perhaps someday I will remember to call you Shepard, but once the Ryncol begins to flow tonight, today will not be that day."

Shepard chuckled in agreement. "I say we get this party started."

* * *

 

Shepard leaned against the wall that split the living room from the bar, drink in hand as Garrus chatted with her quietly. Her eyes kept darting around him to where his father stood. "He hasn't moved since he got here," she said softly so the Turian in question couldn't over hear with his heightened senses. Garrus didn't need to look over his shoulder to know who she was talking about. "Did you have him replaced with a statue?"

Garrus chuckled. "Dad really isn't one for parties, and I'm sure as hell not going to be the one to approach him while he's... doing whatever he's doing..."

Shepard sighed, setting her glass down on her opposite palm and turning it in small circles. "At least he didn't outright argue, or protest."

"The decision is made, Shepard. There isn't much for him to protest. He'll be a grandfather in eleven months whether he likes it or not," Garrus rumbled, his eyes flicking away momentarily to glance at Liara who was talking with Traynor and Brynn. He moved closer to her, strategically blocking her view of his father. She looked up at him and grinned, her finger tracing the rim of her glass. "So have you put any thought into names yet? Sol brought it up earlier and I realized I didn't have an answer for her."

"We should start a list," Shepard said with a shrug. "But not while we're drunk... that's how children end up with horrible names that rhyme with other unfortunate words..."

His laugh was deep as he pulled her against him, "You're drunk already? For shame..."

"Not even close, Vakarian. I believe Dr. Chakwas once told me that even a Krogan couldn't match me drink for drink. I aim to prove her wrong..." she smirked, lifting her free arm up to trace idly down his neck. His responding purr was cut off when a flanged voice cleared their throat behind him. Shepard jerked her hand away as the noise startled her. She hadn't even heard him coming. "Mr. Vakarian, sir." she said as she stepped back from Garrus and hunted for a place to set down her drink as her instincts tried to force her into a military stance. He kind of brought that out in her.

Castis took a moment to watch her fiddle and finally settle on dangling her drink by the rim in her hand behind her back, her wrists crossed and her back stiff. Garrus harrumphed softly before reaching deftly behind her and relieving her of the burden. "Commander... Garrus. I find myself at a loss... that is a rare thing for me, so I am not quite certain how to proceed..."

Shepard cocked her head to the side as Castis Vakarian's subharmonics began to stutter a strange sound that made her frown. Was that confusion? His mandibles slowly moved in and out in a curious twitch. "Is there something I can explain to you, sir?" she asked cautiously.

"Not explain... clarify," he said. "I am well aware of how an Asari... reproduces. I simply wish to know... am I to be a grandfather, or were you the donor?"

"It's not that simple, Dad," Garrus said, swooping in to save her from explaining as her cheeks warmed. "Shepard and I both had a hand in this. We didn't hunt for a way to have a human baby with Shepard's genes, or a turian with mine... Liara put a lot of thought into this and she was able to take what she needed from both of us."

"She will be _our_ daughter," Shepard relaxed her stance and reached out to take Garrus' free hand. "So to answer your question. Yes, you will be a grandfather. Legitimately."

Castis hummed thoughtfully. "How is that even possible?"

"Look, Dad, Liara is the one to ask if you need all of the gory details. If we could do this ourselves, believe me, we would," Garrus confessed, dropping Shepard's hand and pulling her to his side.

She nodded in agreement, but it was unnecessary. Castis' mandibles clicked sharply as he cocked his head, "I know that much is true. Your pheromones are telling me that, and she is throwing out maternal signals as well." Shepard felt her own face slacken in horror as Garrus grunted, somewhere between embarrassment and amusement. "If I didn't know it was impossible, I'd say she was the one..."

Garrus cut him off with a sharp trill in his subharmonics that snapped her head around to be certain it had come from him. His arm tightened around her and Castis' eyes fell on her as she blatantly revealed that she had heard that. Solana approached, frowning. "What did you say to him, Dad?" she hissed.

Shepard glanced around, making certain they weren't making too big of a scene and then returned her gaze to Solana briefly before looking back at Garrus. Solana was rumbling in her chest with fear as Castis and Garrus shared an icy glare. What had so quickly set him off? She reached up and placed her palm on his chest to draw his gaze away from his father and onto her. "What's going on, Big Guy?"

"You smell it, too, don't you, Garrus?" his father said, his eyes never leaving Garrus.

Garrus offered her a small pained smile filled with reassurance that did not translate to his subharmonics before returning his gaze to his father. "I trust Shepard," he said in a low threatening tone.

"What is happening?" Shepard asked, putting herself between them and looking up at Garrus, her eyes fixed on his.

"We shouldn't do this here," Solana hissed softly as Shepard's movement drew a few curious looks their way.

Garrus took her hand and led them to the downstairs guest room. When Sol shut the door behind them, Shepard again turned her eyes on Garrus and asked, "Am I being accused of something?"

"Yes," he said, his eyes narrowing so he was glaring at his father. "Why don't you tell her, Dad?" he spat angrily.

Shepard was baffled. How had this conversation turned so quickly? What had Castis been observing from his spot against the wall? She turned, laying her own eyes on the older version of Garrus standing before her and crossed her arms. "Do I get to hear the charges before I defend myself?"

"Dad..." Solana began, but backed down when Castis set a sharp shake of his head in her direction.

"I simply pointed out that your hormones are very pointedly telling me that you, Commander Shepard, are pregnant," Castis said smoothly, folding his arms over his chest.

If she had still had her glass in her hands, she definitely would have dropped it. "That's impossible," she argued. "Check your nose."

She heard a light inhale as Solana breathed in deeply. "She does smell... different..." Solana agreed.

"Can everyone stop smelling me?" Shepard begged as she turned back to Garrus. His eyes were blatantly anywhere but on her. "Garrus!" she barked, drawing his eyes to her again, but only briefly. She stepped up to him and forced his gaze to her with a soft hand on his face. "Tell me I don't smell different..." She felt hot tears building in her eyes as the answer was revealed in the keening in his chest and the way his eyes flickered.

"I thought..." he sighed heavily, leaning his face into her palm, his eyes closing. "I figured it was just backwash from Liara's thing, but... it hasn't faded. I don't know what to think," he confessed. "I've mostly been ignoring it, but if they can smell it too, then I know I'm not crazy." His hands were gripping her upper arms urgently.

"But I can't be... Garrus... dextro, levo... it's not possible..." she insisted, her heart speeding up with anxiety.

"Which is why Dad is subtly trying to accuse you of infidelity," he said softly.

She balked, a choked gasp leaving her throat as she nearly turned and shoved a biotic fist through Castis' face. Garrus kept hold of her and hugged her to him, understanding the reaction as her fists began to hum with a blue aura. "You know I would never..." she rasped.

"I know," he soothed, not even letting her finish the sentence. "Spirits, I know..."

His fingers found her hair as he held her against him, some of her rage petering as he allowed her to press her ear to his chest and swim in his reassuring subvocals as he ran his talons through the strands. "Come on, Dad. Look at them. You don't really believe..." Solana hummed softly, her own subharmonics sympathetic.

"I don't know what to believe," Castis said with a sigh. "As I said, I am at a loss."

"You don't understand something, so you accuse my mate of sleeping around?" Garrus accused angrily, only his speaking voice changing. His subvocals were all for her.

Castis had reigned in his subvocals, having observed her reacting to Garrus' in the living room. "Garrus, I didn't mean..."

"No, Dad. I think you should leave," he growled, his subharmonics flipping to a regretful keen as he kicked his Dad out.

"Garrus, you don't have to..." she said softly. "None of us are thinking straight right now." She tapped her fingers on his chest. "Maybe this is a conversation best saved for the morning when none of us have been drinking and we don't have an apartment full of guests."

His eyes fell on her, that wonderful shade of blue never ceasing to take her breath with it as he contemplated her. Finally with a ragged sigh he touched his forehead to hers and she closed her eyes, a few of the burning tears finding their way down her cheeks in thin rivulets. "You're right. Of course you're right. I'm sorry, Dad. This was supposed to be a celebration."

Shepard patted his chest and pulled away to turn and face Castis. "Sir, I know this might be... weird... but I am willing to swear to you on my own life, on the Normandy, on my career, that I have not been with anyone besides Garrus in the last three years."

"That is quite the oath, Commander Shepard," Castis said, his throat opening up with an impressed hum.

"I don't do anything half assed, sir," she assured him as his steely eyes did a circuit of her person.

"That is blatantly obvious..." Castis sighed and he glanced at Garrus. "Have her tested, son. If by some miracle from the spirits, you've bypassed biology, she could be in serious danger."

Shepard swallowed. She hadn't even thought of that. Castis gave them both a short nod of his head before walking out slowly. Solana's eyes were wide as she dragged them away from them to follow him out, her mandibles slack with shock. When the door clicked closed, Shepard dropped on to the edge of the bed and dropped her face into her hands. "This can't be happening," she mumbled into her palms as the bed shifted beside her, indicating he'd joined her.

"Have you been feeling all right, lately?" he asked her quietly.

She sighed. "A little tired, but what else is new?" she lifted her head to glance at him and for once, he wasn't studying her, but was looking thoughtfully toward the wall, his mandibles fluttering lightly. His expression was unreadable. "Hey," she said, drawing his gaze to her. She forced a smirk and said, "You _did_ want to know what a Turian-human baby looked like, right?"

The short pull of his right mandible away from his face was something at least. "Sure, Shepard, but not at the risk of your well-being."

She frowned. "How long have you been noticing the change in my scent?"

"After the night with Liara. Like I said, I've been largely ignoring it, because I thought it was some kind of backwash from the meld..." he confessed, his hands running over his fringe.

"Why didn't you say anything?" she wondered.

"Because this..." he gestured at her, circling his hand around her abdomen. "Is impossible, Shepard. Every rule in the universe says so."

She laughed sharply. "Yeah... since when has our universe followed any rules?"

"That makes me feel better," he said sarcastically, his eyes rolling toward the ceiling.

She reached out and took his hand, squeezing it lightly. "Good news is, it hasn't killed me yet... I'll talk to Miri in the morning and maybe we'll get some answers."

He touched his forehead to hers. "Just in case, maybe no more booze tonight, Shepard?"

She pouted and rolled her eyes. "Fine... how are my eyes?"

He let out a short chuckle and brushed his fingers over her cheeks. "Puffy... but beautiful."

"Sweet talker," she chuckled getting up from the bed and taking a few breaths to steady her heart. "Let's hope we didn't cause too much of a scene."

She left the room with him close behind. The music was still playing over the apartment speakers and most of the guests were still having a good time, minding their own and mingling. She sighed in relief and moved to rejoin the crowd, taking note that Garrus' father had disappeared, but Sol had remained. She was currently holding a conversation with Tali as if nothing were amiss.

* * *

 

Garrus watched Shepard pulling her Commander mask on over her emotions as they separated and she moved through the crowd. The subtle musk of her hormones was more pronounced, now that his attention had been drawn directly to it by his father. He didn't know how to feel. He kept a watchful eye on her as she pretended so well that even he was convinced the conversation in the bedroom had never happened.

"Hey, Big Bro," Solana stepped up beside him, a Drossix Blue in both hands. She handed one to him with a gentle smile, her mandibles stretched only a few centimeters from her face. "So, care to explain?"

He sighed, taking a sip of the drink. "I really wish I could, Sol. Shepard's circumstances are... unique... but that still shouldn't mean we could... That's why Liara volunteered."

"She seems to be taking the news well," Solana pointed out as Shepard's laugh filled the room while she, Jacob and Zaeed joked around.

"No, she's not," he muttered, hearing the desperation in the overly boisterous laugh. Shepard's laugh was usually more subtle, along the lines of a chuckle.

He felt his sister watching him and he turned his gaze from Shepard so he could meet her eyes. "I'll never be able to read humans the way you can," she said with a bit of awe.

"It's not hard once you spend enough time around them. Shepard helped me out with some of the finer points," he shrugged, finishing the drink she'd given him to be polite. His mood had sobered quickly. "It's not just humans either. Shepard taught me that you should know your team if you want to work well as a unit. It hasn't failed her yet."

"Maybe I should try that out at the hospital..." Solana said with an impressed hum.

"I'd heard you were working there. How are cleanup efforts coming along?" he asked, grasping for another subject to take his mind off of the nagging dread twisting around in his gut.

To her credit, Solana did not push. She simply pulled her mandibles close to her cheeks and narrowed her eyes before proceeding. Apparently his sister had done some growing up in the last year. "A lot of the equipment was either damaged or destroyed, and supplies like medigel and bandages are in short supply, but luckily we're not overly busy. Dr. Michel is good at rationing since the war."

"She survived?" Garrus asked with his own hum.

Solana nodded. "She was part of the evac to the Ascension when the Reapers took the station. Apparently they had to drug her to separate her from her patients."

"That sounds like Dr. Michel," he said with a short chuckle.

"All right! Who wants cake!" Shepard's voice interrupted their conversation as she drew all eyes to her. She had made her way around to Liara and was dragging the Asari by her wrist to the kitchen where she had just hours ago meticulously decorated both of the cakes she had baked. "Come on over, Big Guy!" she waved her arm, beckoning him to the kitchen. He set the empty glass on the coffee table and shuffled to the kitchen as she continued. "You get to cut the Dextro one..."

"Did you bake these, Shepard?" Kaidan asked with a smirk.

Shepard pointed the knife in her hands at him. "Listen here, Alenko. I will have you know that I am a fantastic cook. Just because you and James are always taking over in the mess, doesn't mean I don't know how to handle myself in a hot kitchen."

"Her lasagna was superb," Miranda said in defense of the leftovers that Shepard had provided them after she had met his dad.

He reached around her to liberate the knife from her grasp as Kaidan put up his hands and shrugged. "Huh... I didn't get any."

A second knife appeared in her hand which she flipped and handed grip first to Liara. "That's because you were too busy with C-Sec and whatever else it is you get up to when you're not on the Normandy." When Kaidan flushed and his eyes flicked away from Shepard for a brief moment, she pushed the drawer shut with a hip and leaned on the counter to size him up. "What _have_ you been up to, Kaidan?" Tali giggled, Reegar cleared his throat and Lia's head dipped in what Garrus read as embarrassment. Shepard absorbed the reactions and he watched her work out the logical conclusion, her expression brightening to a genuine smile. "Oh, No way!" her hand lifted and her thin fingers balled up so she was pointing at Kaidan. Then she flicked it back and forth between him and Lia. "How did I not know about this?!"

From the expressions all around that made Kaidan's cheeks even redder, not a lot of people knew. "Can we not make a big deal out of this?" Lia pleaded in a soft voice, her hands wringing nervously. "We don't even know..."

"Where we really stand..." Kaidan sighed, running his fingers through his hair and fidgeting.

Shepard snorted. "You're finishing each other's sentences."

"Hey, can we get to the cake?" James asked, swooping in to save them any more embarrassment. "I'm gonna need something to absorb all this tequila."

"You gotta talk to the cutters," Shepard shot both him and Liara a grin.

Liara shook her head, her lips pursed as she rolled her eyes before cutting into the levo cake. "I'll get the plates." Ann offered a helping hand, moving away from James who had wrapped his arms around her.

Garrus eyed Shepard as he cut into the dextro cake she had so carefully baked, knowing her casual laughter and tense stance was all an act. She should have let him break up the party and they could have called it an early night. He could tell by her scent that playing pretend was stressing her out. He wasn't the only one. Both Liara and Cortez had a close eye on Shepard. Whether they knew the cause or not, they could tell something was amiss. He silently prayed to the Spirits that she would be okay.

* * *

 

In her utterly sober state, Shepard knew exactly just how late it was. Her eyes were burning with the need to go lie down as all of her friends partied around her. She had made a point to look like she was having fun, but her heart was not in it. Garrus was hovering like an overpaid nanny, and Cortez and Liara both were looking very suspicious of her behavior. She glanced around and realized that Garrus was momentarily distracted by Tali so she slipped away to take a breather in the bedroom where her night had been ruined.

She closed the door behind her, hugging herself and sighed. She had expected Garrus to at least be a little bit excited at the prospect of them getting two for the price of one, but mostly he was terrified. His subs were telling her that. Taking in a deep breath, she moved to sit on the edge of the bed, but she was interrupted by a very unexpected voice. "Sooo, I heard everything that happened earlier."

Shepard yelped in alarm, her biotics rushing to the surface as the air in front of her flickered and Kasumi appeared from under a tactical cloak. "Jesus!" Her heart might have lept out of her chest if Kasumi hadn't backed up with her hands up in defense and giggled lightly. "Kasumi? What the hell are you doing here?"

"It's good to see you too, Shep," she said sarcastically, her partially obscured lips lifting in a smirk. "I arrived back on the Citadel earlier today and heard about this party, so I thought I might surprise you. But from the sound of things, I thought you might need to talk."

"So you hid in my closet to give me a heart attack?" Shepard grumbled, dropping to the bed as her heart slowed. "I almost warped you!" She shook out her hands and reigned in her biotics.

Kasumi giggled again. "I don't know whether to be frightened or proud that I got the jump on you."

"A little bit of both," Shepard shrugged, running her fingers through her hair. Kasumi sauntered over and sat on the bed beside her, pulling her knees up to her chin. "So you got my message I take it?"

"Yes of course." Kasumi said. "I came back as soon as I found a transport. The message was dreadfully short on dates."

"Yeah, we really haven't set one yet. We were waiting for things with the council to settle down... and now this..." she sighed.

Kasumi smirked. "Oh, I don't know. It might be cute to have Tali hold a shotgun to Garrus as you walk down the aisle all round and pregnant."

Shepard snorted. "Yeah, if it doesn't kill me first. I need to find out one way or another before I decide anything. There is a lot of risk involved here."

"Well, you're obviously not dextro sensitive," Kasumi offered.

"In small doses, no... But who can say if I'll survive a full term pregnancy... or if the baby would. This works both ways." She pulled her legs up under her and Kasumi watched her closely. Before she could respond, however, a soft knock sounded at the door. "It's open," Shepard called, holding back her sigh.

The door creaked open and Liara slipped in before closing it behind her. "I saw you come in here and I wanted to come and see if there was something we needed to talk about. Hello, Kasumi."

Liara did not look the least bit shocked to see the tiny thief sitting next to Shepard. "Liara. I see the Shadow Broker still doesn't miss a beat."

Liara smiled, her lips pressed together in a prideful expression. "I'm a very good information broker."

"The best," Kasumi agreed before unfolding herself from the bed and moving to leave the room, her cloak reforming around her. "I'm going to go see what kind of trouble I can get into."

The door opened and closed as Kasumi left, and Liara's blue eyes fell on Shepard. "What's wrong, Shepard?"

Shepard patted the bed where Kasumi had been sitting and Liara took her place, her eyes concerned. "I really don't know how to say this..." Shepard said as Liara studied her.

Liara reached out and took her hand, squeezing lightly. "You can tell me anything."

"Well, apparently since the night we... melded, Garrus has been ignoring the fact that I smell... different," Shepard sighed, throwing herself back to lay on the bed.

"Different, how?" Liara asked, lying back beside her so they looked like they were cloud gazing.

"According to every Turian here, I smell..." she let out a deep sigh and glanced over at Liara whose attention was steadily on her. "Pregnant?"

Liara frowned. "That can't be, Shepard."

"That's what I said, but we did a lot of experimenting that night. No Asari has ever done what you did. Who knows what effect it might have on the other parties involved... To be sure, Garrus wants to go to Miranda once everyone has sobered up..."

Liara rolled to her side, leaning on her elbow and frowned. Then after a moment, her eyes widened and she gasped softly. "Wait... Shepard, were you still carrying the catalyst that night?"

Shepard sat up, her gut twisting in panic. "I... I don't know. I had forgotten all about it. Once Leviathan was dead, I figured it would just leave on it's own. You don't think..." She turned to glance at Liara, who also sat up, with wide eyes. Her arms wrapped automatically around her stomach. "Oh God, Liara."

Liara leaned in and hugged her. "It's all right, Shepard. It's not your fault. I'll do whatever I can to help if it turns out they're right."

Shepard chuckled in between the fresh stream of tears that slipped past her Commander mask. "Leave it to me to find a way to diminish the huge sacrifice you made for me and Garrus."

Liara hummed her own small chuckle. "We all know you like to be the center of attention, Shepard."

"I was an only child. I don't share well," she joked, a small sense of relief washing over her as she realized that Liara was not upset.

"Perhaps your daughter will not have that same problem with her big brother or sister to share with," Liara said soothingly.

"You better be prepared, she's a Vakarian. She's bound to have a big head," Shepard said, pulling away from Liara and wiping her cheeks.

Liara smiled and touched Shepard's cheek. "I'll write that into the birth plan."

Shepard snorted. "Yeah, me too."

* * *

 

A few hours later, people began to find places to pass out, or in a few cases, their significant others took them home. Shepard disappeared upstairs, turning the shower on hot and stepping in to try and scald away her tension. It wasn't long before Garrus found her, looking to start the conversation she was far too tired to hold. "Shepard, you up here?"

"Shower," she called out. "I'll be out in a minute." She turned off the water and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around her and picking up her brush before leaving the bathroom to find him standing and fidgeting beside the bed. "Hey, Big Guy," she said with a smile, reaching up to start brushing out her hair.

He turned to glance at her and rumbled with approval. "You know you wore that same outfit on our first night together."

"Don't spread that around... think of the scandal... 'Commander Shepard doubles up on outfits'..." She framed her hands like the headline was printed in an article and snickered.

He moved toward her, and cocked his head. "You look exhausted," he said softly, taking the brush from her busy hands and tossing his head toward the bed. She grabbed a pillow and set it on the floor beside the bed and sat down on it while he straddled her shoulders, shifting so his spurs weren't in her way of leaning back into him. He began to slowly brush through her hair.

She closed her eyes and sighed. "It _has_ been a long night..."

"Listen, Shepard, I don't want you to think I'm disappointed or upset..." he began, still tending to her hair.

"I know, Big Guy... I'm..." She let out a ragged sigh and wrapped an arm around his leg. "I'm scared too. I've never been more ready for anything in my life, but I wasn't really expecting it to be going down quite like this... but then we really don't know if it _is_ going down like this." She leaned her head on his knee. "I'm not going to fret about it anymore. I've been worrying all night and that's going to get us nowhere. We might be stressing over nothing." His subharmonics shifted constantly in his chest, never quite settling on a single emotion. She grinned and nudged his leg before craning her neck to look up at him, jostling his hands from her hair and desperately trying to drag the keen from the mix. "So if it's a boy, do you wanna name it after your dad?"

His eyes widened, "Spirits, no!" he let out his own amused chuckle. "The universe couldn't handle another Castis Vakarian."

Shepard smirked and then frowned. "I don't think I know the answer to this, but what sort of time frame are we looking at here?"

Garrus hummed. "If it happened that night, which I'm fairly certain it did, we're looking at another...uh... twenty weeks... by Turian standards. But I know humans are a bit longer."

"That's it!" Shepard's eyes widened and she spun to look at him. "I don't know whether to be relieved or freaked out."

"Turian infants are adapted to be born a bit premature because the mothers can't accommodate the growth. Their plates aren't permeable enough, and their pelvis can't shift quite like a human or an asari. Since your body is built to handle a full term human infant, you might be able to squeeze a bit more time out of it, but that all depends on how our DNA got shared and what traits it will take on..." he explained.

She snorted. "Geez, Garrus. When did you become a biologist?"

He shrugged. "Research has gotten me pretty far in the past."

Shepard turned and settled on her knees, walking her fingers up his chest. "Where _do_ you find the time, Garrus Vakarian?"

"Do you mean in between all of my calibrations and saving your ass?" he asked with a purr. "Those are both basically a full time job."

"Hey, it's a good ass," she smirked.

"Best I've seen," he agreed, reaching out and lifting her into his lap. Her towel slipped down to pool around her waist as she giggled. "Why do you think I keep saving it?"

"I'd like to think it's because of my charm," she said reaching up to wrap her arms around his neck and caress her fingers over his fringe. Before he had a chance to finish the banter, she dipped her head to touch her forehead to his. "We'll make it through this. I promise."

He grunted and his arms slipped around her to pull her naked chest to him. "Spirits, I hope you're right."

* * *

 

Shepard woke up at 6 A.M., her internal clock buzzing at her usual hour in spite of the late night she'd had. Garrus was huddled tight to her back his arms hugging her close. She shifted her body, huddling into his warmth and shutting her eyes to try an force herself back to sleep, but it was no use. Even the quiet snoring in his subs wasn't going to get her back to sleep.

She sighed and gently lifted his arm from around her waist to slip free. It was likely no one else was up yet, but she could still go down to her office and get some work done as long as she couldn't sleep. She pulled on shorts and a t-shirt and quietly left the bedroom, closing the door behind her. When she got to the middle landing on the stairs to her office, she spotted Kaidan sitting up on the couch, Lia's head in his lap. She smiled and wiggled her fingers at him as he rolled his neck. He mouthed a good morning to her before checking his omnitool for the time and frowned, looking up at her and then back down as if he didn't believe she was up at that hour. She pressed her lips together and shrugged then padded her way down the hall, past the bar and card table and into her office alcove. Her desk was strewn with data pads and she had a few of her tinkering projects that she had moved from the Normandy set up on the back half of the table near Ferguson's cage. The hamster poked his nose out of his house to see who was lifting his lid as she dropped a handful of food into his bowl and patted his head with two fingers.

A soft clearing of a throat turned her around and she saw that Kaidan had extricated himself from Lia and followed her. "Everything all right, Shepard?"

The question hit her like a punch to the gut and she dropped into her desk chair as he set his all too familiar concerned puppy eyes on her. "Yes... no... I don't know?" She rolled her chair closer to the desk and dropped her forehead onto the cool surface. "Can you repeat the question?"

"That shouldn't be a hard answer," he said, dragging one of the chairs from around the card table and sitting down across the desk from her. "I saw Garrus' dad leaving pretty early last night. Did something happen?"

Shepard sat back in her chair and picked up a bit of broken tech so she could toss it between her hands and occupy them. "I'm not his favorite person to begin with, as if that wasn't obvious, but with everything that's happening and some other stuff that _might_ be happening..." she sighed, tipping her head back to stare at the ceiling. It was hard not to confess to one of her oldest friends while he was staring her down quite so effectively. It was bad enough that Kasumi knew already. Until she was sure, she didn't want the whole crew to know.

" 'Might' be happening?" he asked as one of his brows rose in question.

She tossed the tech on the desk and said, "I don't wanna say anything until Miri and I have had a long talk."

"Okay, Shepard, I won't pry, but if you're involving Miranda, that means a medical problem. You _are_ okay, right?" he asked, sitting forward, his elbows resting on her desk.

"I seem to be... for now... like I said, I don't really know anything until we've talked. I appreciate your concern Kaidan," she offered him a smile.

"Yeah... You know, I worry about you," he admitted with a shrug.

"Ugh, please don't. Garrus does enough of that for the entire crew," she chuckled.

He joined in her laughter then got up from his chair. "You look like you could use some coffee. I'll go put on a pot."

"Thanks, Kaidan," she said pointedly, not just for the coffee, but for his understanding.

* * *

 

It was two hours before Miranda showed herself, unpredictably out of uniform and her hair tousled. Her heels were left wherever she'd left the rest of her clothes and Shepard cocked a hip and grinned as the now much shorter woman shuffled into the kitchen to hunt for the tea. "I hope you don't mind, I borrowed some clothes from the guest room," she commented, setting the kettle lightly on the stove as Shepard continued to smirk at the obvious hangover.

"You look like you could use something stronger than that shit, sweetheart," Zaeed grunted from the other side of the island.

"He's right, Miri... rough night?" Shepard teased.

Miranda grunted. "Don't ever let Traynor mix your drinks for you."

The woman in question chuckled. "I paid my way through college by bartending... well, on top of my Alliance scholarships of course. I needed extra for all of my medications."

"And your 6000 credit toothbrush," Shepard smirked, crossing her arms.

"That toothbrush saved the Normandy, might I remind you," Traynor said defensively.

"And that is why I am personally making sure you have a lifetime supply," Shepard said with a nod. Then she turned her attention back to Miranda. "Any plans today, Miri?"

"I was thinking of taking the day off," Miranda said, shrugging languidly. "Why, did you need me for something?"

"If you have some free time..." Shepard said, biting her lip.

"Of course, Shepard," Miranda smiled as Garrus appeared in the doorway and upon spotting Shepard, moving to stand behind her and gently give her a reach around kiss on her cheek before moving to the pot of Kava she had made that Lia had already had two mugs of.

"Thanks, Miri. Wake yourself up and meet me on the Normandy in..." Shepard checked the time on her omnitool and then finished. "two hours."

Garrus hummed and turned to her. "Don't forget we are supposed to be starting our SPECTRE debriefing meetings this afternoon."

Shepard lifted her arm and tapped some buttons on her omnitool. "Was that today? I'm certain you're mistaken, Vakarian."

His omnitool chirped and he pulled his mandibles close to his face and lifted his wrist to glance at his calendar change. "Esheel is going to love this," he said sarcastically.

"My business is more important," she shrugged. "Esheel can go suck an egg."

"Well, it wouldn't do to have all of those important meetings without proper Quarian representation, anyhow," Garrus said with a humming chuckle.

"I like that excuse. Let's go with that," she said, picking up her coffee mug and finishing off what was left of her third cup and then rinsing it before putting it in the dishwasher.

* * *

 

Shepard sat on the medbay bed, her left arm bent at the elbow as she held a small bit of gauze over her newest needle hole. Garrus stood at her side, his mandibles drooped in shock as Miranda repeatedly shuffled through her results and shook her head. "This can't be..."

Shepard's stomach was in knots and Garrus' subs were a jumble of unfamiliar noises. "Did you measure twice, cut once, Miri? Those results are accurate?" Shepard managed to choke out as Garrus' palm found her back. Just the simple touch made her feel a tiny bit better, though not much.

"Of course they're accurate, Shepard." She sighed and dropped her arms to her sides. "I hate to sound unknowledgeable, but I'm not even certain how to proceed. This is... extraordinary."

"I'll say," Shepard said, inhaling a ragged breath and sagging against Garrus.

"Can you at least tell us if this is even safe?" Garrus asked, his arm slipping further around her.

Miranda glanced up from the papers she had lifted again to look over for the tenth time. She cleared her throat and stepped closer, stacking the papers and setting them aside. "I'd like to run a few more tests and get a look inside if you don't mind. How long ago did you say this apparently happened?"

"A month," Shepard offered as Miranda reached out to press her fingers to Shepard's lymph nodes.

"And you've noticed no change to your cycle?" Miranda asked with a frown.

"I don't typically have one," Shepard shrugged. "Alliance birth control. It's an IUD. Those take months to wear off and it _could_ have been lost in the aftermath of the crucible."

"Right. I'd forgotten about that," Miranda nodded, falling into her concerned doctor mode and examining her little heart out. She stepped around to Shepard's right and shooed Garrus out of her way. After extensively listening to Shepard's heart and her breathing, she sighed in what sounded like mild relief. "The good news is that you're not showing any of the typical signs of anaphylaxis, yet."

"Buuut," Shepard prompted, nearly tasting the word on Miranda's tongue.

"But until you are far enough along for me to do an amniocentesis, I simply do not have enough information, and that is at the _least_ , 8 weeks away." Miranda sighed again, this time in frustration then muttered to herself. "How did this even happen?"

"Liara and I actually have a theory on that," Shepard offered. With a wave of Miranda's hand indicating she should continue, she said, "So while that whole mess with Leviathan was happening, the catalyst sort of lent me a little piece of itself to protect my thoughts from being discovered, but you already knew that. Liara thinks that when we... embraced eternity... I may have still been carrying that extra spark. The meld combined with the catalyst and a possible missing IUD apparently equals cross species, cross amino baby." Garrus' mandibles clicked thoughtfully as Miranda's eyes rolled at Shepard's colorful explanation. Miranda took the idea and stored it away, moving to run a few more tests and then she pulled around an ultrasound machine and hunted down a speculum. "Oh, boy... do you have a warmer for those things?" Shepard asked hopping down from the table when Miranda shooed her so she could bring up the stirrups. "You might wanna do the ultrasound first and then let the Big Guy take a walk. This could get messy."

Miranda smirked and waved Shepard back onto the table. "That may be a good idea."

She had Shepard lay back as she started up the monitor and tapped on the wand to test it. Seemingly satisfied, she went about the process of prepping and starting the ultrasound as Garrus moved back to Shepard's side. His hand found hers and he held onto her tightly. Shepard glanced away from the monitor and found him watching the screen closely. She squeezed his hand. "You okay?" she asked softly.

He grunted, his eyes never leaving the monitor as Miranda slowly hunted around her abdomen for their baby. "I'll let you know once my brain believes what's happening," he said, his mandibles pulling away from his face momentarily.

"There we are," Miranda said in awe and Shepard's eyes snapped from Garrus and back to the screen. "Seeing is believing, I suppose."

"Yeah, no shit!" Shepard said, as Miranda pointed out the small circle.

Garrus' subs paused momentarily before starting back up in a trilling purr. His hand tightened again in hers and she took a moment to look away from the actual miracle happening inside her to take in his expression. He also finally looked away and his mandibles were parted in a wide smile. "Yeah, Shepard. I'm okay." He leaned down to touch his forehead to hers and as she closed her eyes to accept his affection, she felt a tear slip from the corner of her eye. "I love you," he whispered.

She let out a bark of laughter as she turned her head to look back at the monitor. "That's just the shock talking." She stared for a few more minutes and then she frowned. "Does this thing not get sound?"

"It's still a bit early for that," Miranda said leaving the wand in place for a few more moments to take a few pictures and readings. "We won't be able to pick up a heart beat for another few weeks."

She removed the wand and the monitor went black. "Speaking of weeks... under the circumstances, how long do you think we have to plan the nursery?" Shepard asked, taking the towel offered her and wiping the gel from her skin.

Miranda's mouth opened and closed before a frown wrinkled her forehead. "I couldn't say... but I am going to be monitoring you very closely and I'm prescribing you an epinephrine shot that I want you to take with you everywhere. For now, it seems like your natural resistance to dextro fluids is holding out, but there is still a huge risk. If you feel any dizziness, sudden fever, trouble breathing, difficulty swallowing, abdominal pain, anything out of the ordinary, you tell someone immediately and take that shot."

"Would you mind sending me a list of all of the symptoms I should look out for?" Garrus asked. "More often than not Shepard finds it too much of a hassle to monitor her own well being." He playfully nudged her shoulder.

"And you trust her to be a mother, twice?" Miranda said with a joking grin of her own.

"I did say her _own_ well being," he pointed out.

"Yeah, yeah," Shepard said shooing him. "Now get out of here before you see things no self respecting Turian should have to witness. I'll meet you back at home?"

"I could wait..." he offered, tossing his thumb over his shoulder toward the med bay exit.

"Actually, if you could help me convince Tali she belongs on the council, I'd owe you big Vakarian," Shepard said with a wink.

"Consider it done," he purred, leaning in to give her a short kiss on the cheek, his mandibles fluttering over her skin, before he left.

"Tell me, Shepard. Do you exist to simply make my job harder?" Miranda asked with her lips pursed together in a half grin.

"I exist to make everyone's job harder. You're not special, Miri," Shepard said leaning back again and tossing her feet into the stirrups. "Now's your chance for payback."

* * *

 

Upon leaving the Normandy a prescription heavier, Shepard was not certain what to do next. Her mind was reeling with the shocking reality of her situation. She found herself in a skycar, flying up to the spot where Garrus had taken her for their first unofficial date on top of the Presidium. She got out of the car and moved to the edge, dropping down to sit cross-legged and stare out over the Citadel. From where she was, she had a flawless view of the crucible that had apparently become a permanent part of the station. It's dark color stood out against the bright hues of the Citadel. She drank in the view for a moment before turning her attention to her omnitool where Miranda had sent her one of the pictures of her ultrasound. It was still so unbelievable. Shepard's mind swirled with questions that she swallowed as she became lost in her own excitement. Her dreams were coming true twice over. Two for the price of one. Now all that was left was to make it through the next few months.

She was staring at the picture when her omnitool began to chirp happily. She swiped the photo reluctantly to the background to answer the vid call from Liara. "Hey, Liara."

"Good morning, Shepard. I waited as long as I could, hoping you had the time to get any news. My hands are shaking," she said with a small chuckle.

Shepard smiled. "Well, it's official. I am a freak of nature." She minimized Liara's holo and sent out the photo to her then brought the call back up.

"By the goddess," Liara gasped as she received the picture. "Never in a million years..." her soft voice was interrupted as glyph informed her that there was news about the charity ball.

"Get back to work, Liara. We'll talk later," Shepard said with an understanding smile.

"Are you sure? And you're sure you're all right?" Liara asked quickly as her eyes flicked back and forth between the call and her other business, the concern and attention no less on Shepard than it had been before the interruption. Shadow Broker multitasking at it's finest.

"I'm fine, Liara. I promise."

"Okay, but I want to be there when you make your announcement," Liara said with a grin.

"Bring your recorder. I think Garrus' dad might literally explode," Shepard said with a chuckle.

You can pay your children's way through university off the royalties from that vid," Liara agreed. "We'll talk later.... and Shepard, congratulations."

"Thanks, Liara. You're sure you're not upset?" Shepard asked.

Liara laughed sweetly. "Shepard you certainly didn't plan this. It was an accident, but a happy one. Enjoy your miracle and stop worrying. Stress is bad for you."

Shepard snorted. "Tell that to the rest of the galaxy."

The call ended and Shepard inhaled a deep breath before standing and stretching out her limbs. She flew back to the apartment and found Garrus lounging in one of the recliners in the living room and studying a datapad. She scooted him over and he made room for her in the small space beside him. "How'd the rest of your visit go?" he asked her as she took the datapad from him to see what he had been up to.

"Intrusive, as usual. Did you get anywhere with Tali?" she asked noting that he had been scrolling through a list of names, all of them human.

"Of course I did. She'll be at the meeting tomorrow and Andel will be on his way back to Rannoch," Garrus purred, taking the data pad back from her and tapping it lightly on her head.

She turned sideways, leaning against his chest with her legs over him and covertly pulled up the picture. "I have something for you." She flicked the file to his omnitool.

He chuckled as the image came up. "I'm having this framed and putting it on my desk at the embassy."

"It's yours to do what you want with." She tipped her head to lean it on his chest and he turned the data pad to her again. "Looking up names?"

He hummed in response. "Yeah, I figure we really don't know how much time we have, so we should be prepared. What were your parents' names?"

"I am the proud daughter of Hannah and Alan Shepard," she said, making a face at her father's name. "Although I don't think either of them is worth recycling. Especially dad."

"Hannah isn't so bad," he mused, typing it out around her.

Shepard shrugged. "I guess I just pictured our kids having Turian names. They'd sound better with Vakarian."

"We don't even know if you're having a boy or a girl..." he huffed.

"Then let's start with the easy one. We know Liara is having a girl..." she took the data pad from him and did a search for Turian female names. "Hmm... Vetra? No... alliteration... Nyreen... I knew a Nyreen on Omega when I did that favor for Aria..." he harrumphed at the mention of her short solo three day stint to Omega to help Aria take the station back from Cerberus while they were on the Citadel for dry dock. She pushed forward, listing some of the names she thought sounded good from the list until she felt his eyes on her and not the datapad. She looked up and he was smiling at her, his subs trilling happily. "What?" she asked returning his expression.

He took the data pad for a moment and set it aside to pull her against him so she could feel the vibration of his chest. It drew a contented sigh from her lips and she could hear the 'I love you', thrumming amidst the rest. "I already said it today, so this is probably pushing my luck, but I don't give a damn... I love you, Shepard."

"Oooh, twice in one day! What's a girl to think?" she gasped, her breath hitching as her heart fluttered and the butterflies took off in her stomach.

"That I am the luckiest Turian in the galaxy," he purred, dipping his head so their lips brushed ever so gently together. She reached up and caressed her palm over his scarred mandible, her fingers tracing over the dips and divots before she closed the minute gap between them. His hand slipped around her waist and over her hip. She shifted in his lap, moaning softly as he broke the kiss and moved to flutter his mandibles over her neck. Then he laughed, "That would be an embarrassing name," pulling his mouth and warm breath away from her neck.

"You insufferable tease," she complained as she clung to his neck her breathing fast around the lump of arousal he'd planted in her gut.

"We have all day, Shepard, and we haven't picked a name for one, let alone both..." he said with a smirk. Then he picked up the data pad and hummed as he scrolled through the list in front of him, knowing full well that the hum was teasing her even worse.

"I hate you," she grumbled, releasing the hold she had around his neck and slumping back into her original spot in his lap. He chuckled and she snatched the pad from him with a scowl. They shared a few moments of quiet, scrolling slowly through the list before either of them spotted one they liked. "Oh, there's one," Shepard said pausing.

"I see one, too," he grinned. "I wonder if it's the same one."

"Write yours down," she said already tapping on her omnitool. "On three..." She counted down and they turned their wrists to show each other the name they'd chosen.

"Well, I guess we just named our Asari," he chuckled as the name Raelnyx was displayed on their screens.

"Parenting win," Shepard grinned then patted her belly. "Now for the hard part."

He rumbled. "Let's see. We'll pick another girl name and a boy name..." He picked the pad up from her lap where she'd laid it and they scrolled through some more. "Do you like Taelyn?"

Shepard thought for a minute and then smirked. "That would make them Rae and Tae... I like that."

She snickered. "That's our second girl." he tapped a few buttons on the datapad and it brought up male Turian names. "Are you sure you're dead set on Turian names?"

"Let's say he comes out looking fully turian... can you picture the poor boy living his life as Bob Vakarian?" she said with her lip curled back.

Garrus conceded her point and they sat for hours, laughing, joking and finally settling on, "Caitus?" Garrus asked.

"Oh, yes, I like that," Shepard said, testing the name on her lips. "Caitus Vakarian..." She took the datapad from his hands and shifted again in his lap, straddling him. "Children named... what ever shall we do with our afternoon?" She leaned in, pressing herself against him, nuzzling his neck as her mouth found his favorite spot by the base of his fringe. She dropped the data pad to the floor behind the chair as he shuddered beneath her.

A sharp chirp from his omnitool made them both growl in frustration. She sat back, lowering her hands to drag lightly over his chest as he grumbled. "It's Dad." He cleared his throat and carefully shut off his subs before accepting the call. "Hey, dad."

"Garrus... I was wondering if you had taken my advice," His voice was curt and to the point.

"As a matter of fact we did. Shepard's pregnant," he informed his father, his back rigid as he braced himself for the backlash.

Castis simply grunted. "What sort of precautions are you taking?"

"Shepard's been given... what did Miranda call it?" he asked her glancing away from his father to ask her about her shot.

She pulled the shot from her pocket and showed it to him. "An Epipen." Garrus turned his wrist so she was in the conversation as well. "I'm supposed to take it at the first sign of anaphylaxis and then get to Miranda ASAP."

Castis glanced from her to the small device and she took note of the shift in his face plates as one brow rose in disbelief. Did he still think she was lying? There was a brief awkward silence before Castis sighed. When the sigh was not punctuated with any words, Garrus hummed to draw his attention. "We got a picture, Dad. Would you like to see your grandchild?"

Castis' expression changed. It was less suspicious and more curious. "It doesn't look like much now," Shepard said with a shrug, "But from what I understand, that should change pretty quickly."

"Unless of course you go a full human term," he said pointedly before nodding to Garrus. "Send me the photo." Garrus swiped over the file and Shepard watched it affect the man. For a brief moment, his skepticism flew out the window and his normally tightly controlled subvocals purred. Shepard couldn't hold back the short chuckle of laughter and she covered her mouth. Castis chose to ignore her outburst. "Thirty years ago, your mother brought home one of these when she found out she was pregnant with you. Biggest shock of my life. Again, I'm amazed. You've... You've chosen a fine mate. Keep her safe, son."

"Yes, of course, sir," Garrus said hesitantly as if he didn't trust the praise.

"My break is over. We'll talk later," Castis did not say goodbye, instead, the vid call simply dropped.

"You all right, Big Guy?" Shepard asked with her own hesitation.

"Yeah... It's just not everyday I get that sort of compliment from Dad," he said, dropping his arm down to slide up her thigh, squeezing at the crease between her leg and her rear. "But I don't want to talk about him right now."

"Yes, sir, Mr. Vakarian," Shepard chuckled and resumed her ministrations.

* * *

 

"We may have a problem," Shepard's eyes flicked up from where she had been staring at the console in front of her to glance at the Salarian across the gap from her. She'd nearly been dozing off on her feet as they listened to the endless slew of reports from individual SPECTREs from all over the galaxy. With the word 'problem', he had her attention.

"You have something, Bau?" she asked, having worked closely with the man during the war to oust an indoctrinated Hanar before he destroyed the Hanar homeworld. He was a good SPECTRE and good at following leads.

He nodded quickly as she crossed her arms and gave him her attention, wishing they had brought chairs for these debriefs. "As you know, after the Crucible fired, the galaxy was in a state of turmoil. The Reapers were destroyed, but there were never any official efforts to dispose of their corpses. With help from the SPECTRE task force you assembled after the incident with the Hanar, I took it upon myself to take records of each Reaper. We've been monitoring the situation..." He tapped a few buttons on his omnitool and Shepard's console flashed with a message. She pulled it up as the rest of the council did the same. As the information hit her, she felt a twisting in her gut and she looked back at Bau for confirmation. "That was precisely my reaction, Commander Shepard."

"Have you been able to figure out who is doing this?" she asked, her heart speeding up. Garrus grunted beside her and glanced in her direction.

"I couldn't say, but with council support, I'd like to expand my team and dig further into the situation," he asked.

She glanced between the five other councilors and each of them agreed with a nod. "You'll have every resource you need, Bau."

"Thank you, councilors. I would also like to request formal acknowledgement of a new recommendation for SPECTRE status. I will take the recruit under my command and send regular updates on his progress," Bau said.

"What's his name?" Shepard asked, trusting Bau.

"I believe you and your crew are acquainted with him. STG Major Kirrahe," Bau explained.

"Kirrahe survived?" Garrus asked in surprise. "I'd heard his platoon was wiped out on Earth."

"We had suspected as much, but a group of Krogan investigated the site and were able to recover the Major and several others from his unit. They had holed up with an Asari commando squad beneath a leveled building, the commandos taking turns to maintain a barrier to keep the roof from caving in on them. They were trapped for weeks and many were in no shape to identify themselves for quite some time," Bau remarked, his tone impressed.

"I'll agree to the request," Nasryna said with a nod. "I knew some of the commandos in that squad. My reports say that Kirrahe showed exceptional fortitude."

"I second," Shepard agreed.

Once the decision was made and Shepard looked at the time she sighed in relief as Bau exited. "I believe we've heard enough for today," Bakara intoned.

The council adjourned and Shepard followed the others out toward the embassies. "Keelah," Tali said, stretching her arms up over her head. "Why didn't we bring chairs?"

"I'm going to get one of those hover chairs like Dornu has," Shepard chuckled, flattening her hands on her sides and leaning backwards to hear an audible pop from her spine. "I'm also getting flatter shoes."

"Like you need those heels anyway, Shepard. You're already almost as tall as Garrus," Tali tossed her head toward the Turian in question.

"But they look so good with my dress," Shepard pointed out as she rolled her eyes and kicked the shoes off to walk barefoot down the corridor. "I miss my combat boots."

"So who do you think is stealing Reaper parts?" Tali wondered as they headed for Shepard's office and the couches she'd had set up in there.

"I don't know, but I almost wish I could go with Bau. Now I'm just going to be sitting here worrying," she sighed, dropping down on the nearest sofa.

Garrus' subs growled a warning. "It's a good thing you're grounded then," he grunted. Sitting down next to her. She lifted her feet and wiggled her toes at him as Tali sat in one of the opposite seats.

"Why is Shepard grounded?" she asked with a curious lilt as she cocked her helmet to the side.

As Garrus took Shepard's foot in his hands and began hitting all of her aching pressure points she sighed and melted into the sofa before they exchanged a glance to decide if they wanted to tell Tali yet. Shepard shrugged. "You let the cat out of the bag, Vakarian. I'm not explaining to Liara why she isn't getting to see this reaction."

Garrus sighed even though his subs began to trill excitedly. "Well, on top of her no longer actually being a SPECTRE since accepting the council position, Shepard is... how do humans say it...? Living for two?"

Shepard chuckled. "It's 'eating for two'... close enough."

Tali's head tipped further as she puzzled out what they were saying. "Wait... Keelah... wait... I thought... wait... Liara... Keelah..."

"Take a breath, Tali," Shepard said with a grin as Garrus laughed.

"I don't underst... how?" Tali blurted.

"Well, you see, when a man and a woman _really_ love each other," Shepard teased, making Garrus' laugh louder.

"Keelah, I know _how_ ," Tali shrieked.

Shepard smiled and shrugged. "We've acceped it as an impossible accident. Even Miranda has no idea how. We think it had something to do with Liara's meld and the catalyst bouncing around in here together." She indicated her person.

"So, besides Liara and Miranda... who else knows?" Tali asked, Shepard picturing her eyes bugging out from the tone in her voice.

"Garrus' dad... and Liara has probably told Javik. Kasumi overheard us at the party. I don't want to steal Liara's thunder. We threw that big announcement party for her and if we do another one right away I'm going to feel bad," Shepard sighed.

"Well, it's not like you planned it," Tali said, repeating Liara's own assurances.

Shepard shrugged. "We have some time before it's going to be obvious. It'll keep."

* * *

 

It took longer than expected for Nasryna and Liara to get the charity ball underway. They ran into complications with the cleanup as well as hiring security and getting the games functioning properly. By the morning before, Shepard was scrambling to get her dress re-fitted while Kasumi clucked at her to hold still as she tried out different hair styles. "You're stressing out too much, Shep," the little thief scolded.

"In case you hadn't noticed, the eyes of the entire galaxy are going to be on me tonight," she grumbled. "I don't need that kind of attention."

Kasumi pulled a pin from Shepard's hair and her whole style fell back down around her shoulders where Kasumi began to brush it again. "Don't worry. We'll have you looking so good that no one will even notice that tiny hiccup in your waistline. It's barely noticeable now, and you're sitting down."

Shepard crossed her arms and legs and huffed, sliding down in her chair and drawing a Japanese curse from Kasumi. She had been feeling under the weather all morning. Between the nerves about the evening and a general feeling of dread that had settled in the pit of her stomach, her nausea was in full swing. Sitting in a hard chair while Kasumi played in her hair was not high on her to do list. What she really wanted was to curl up in bed and sleep all day. Twelve weeks along was half way through by Turian standards and she was feeling more and more each day that this was going to play out by Turian standards. She was already feeling more than the occasional flutter that most human mothers felt at this stage and her clothes had already begun to feel a bit snug at the waist. Miranda had insisted they bring Dr. Chakwas into the loop early on due to her knowledge of not only human but Turian physiology as well as she agreed that Shepard seemed to be progressing well considering the circumstances and the fact that none of them knew what to expect.

Tali came in, carrying two dress bags. And she cocked her head as Kasumi twirled Shepard's hair up in another seemingly impossible style before wrinkling her nose and dropping it again. "I picked up your dress when I got mine from having it fitted with seals." Tali announced as she hung both bags on the back of the door. "I don't know why you paid to have that one let out when you could have just fabricated another one."

"Because that stupid machine can't figure out how to discreetly make a baby bump disappear," Shepard said with a grunt shooing Kasumi's hands from her head and standing up to battle with another short wave of nausea at the swift movement before pushing through to pluck her dress from the door. "It had better fit this time or I give up. The galaxy will get to see this thing in all it's splendor." She stuck her gut out and patted it with a chuckle as Tali opened her own dress to check that her specifications were all correct. She had gotten a full body dress made that had seals installed at the waist so she could still wear the bottom of her enviro suit beneath the skirt, the rest of the dress acting as the top half of her suit, all of the seals in place so she could fit her helmet on as well. "Reegar's suit is going to short out when he sees you in that," Shepard commented as the light purple dress was revealed.

"That's the idea," Tali said suggestively.

Shepard took her dress from the bag and smiled at the Vakarian blue that was laced throughout the black chiffon. It was designed off the shoulder, but a hundred times more modestly cut than the one she'd worn the last time she'd been to the casino. She slipped out of her shirt and pulled the dress on over her head, leaving her shorts on under it just to see how it fit. Both of her arms were bare and the dress hung straight down until a short slit that started near mid thigh on her right leg made walking easier. The layer of chiffon over the silken layer underneath allowed her to move naturally without drawing attention to her widening middle. She twirled, letting the other two get a good look. "What do you think?"

"I think I just heard Garrus loose his mind," Kasumi giggled. "And now I know what I'm working with."

Shepard took the dress back off and hung it up to wait while she sat back down in the chair. Kasumi had two hours to work with if Shepard was going to arrive on time to be the main event. Tali took the task of Shepard's manicure as Kasumi brushed, tugged and twirled Shepard's hair. Soon enough, Traynor showed up with jewelry she was lending Shepard and quickly left to go back to getting herself ready. She had eventually in the last few months appointed herself Shepard's personal secretary and as such was going to be at her side that night along with Kaidan who had merited an invite as the honored second human SPECTRE and Shepard's personal security.

When Shepard had been dressed up to the point that she could barely recognize herself, she slipped on her short heels and waited for Tali to finish the last of her preparations while Kasumi disappeared to do a bit of recon at the casino. When her friend came from the bathroom, her helmet not yet on and smiled, Shepard gasped. "What do you think?" Tali asked coyly.

"Wow," Shepard said, fumbling for anything better. Tali was a vision in the gown, in spite of it being so functional, it suited her frame splendidly.

The quarian's cheeks flushed lightly and she lifted her helmet up with a sigh. "I was hoping to get permission to at least leave this stupid thing off, but there are going to be so many people there in an unclean environment, Karin said she wouldn't recommend it."

"I'm sorry, Tali. But you're making amazing progress. Just look at us talking face to face," Shepard said with a grin.

Tali smirked. "You're leaving Garrus out again."

Shepard snorted. "Right place right time. I can't help he's never in either."

Tali chuckled. "At least not when it comes to this. He was definitely in the right place and time three months ago."

"One in a zillion chance and he hit the mark. That's my sniper," Shepard shrugged.

Tali snorted and slipped her helmet into place, the seal hissing as it activated. "Are you ready?"

"As I'll ever be," Shepard sighed, feeling only slightly better that Tali had agreed to arrive with her and take some of the pressure and attention off of her.

* * *

 

When their taxi arrived outside the casino and the doors lifted to reveal the mob of cameras and recording devices accompanied by reporters of all races, Shepard swallowed the lump in her throat with difficulty as her stomach flipped again. Kaidan greeted her with his arm and she took it gratefully, carefully standing so her dress pooled just right. His easy smile was interrupted momentarily as he guided her down the carpet past the shouting press and flashing cameras. "You all right, Shepard? You look a little flushed."

She cleared her throat around the persistent lump and forced an amiable smile. "Just really not looking forward to all of this attention. Makes me chafe."

Kaidan smirked. "Well, Garrus is inside fielding some of the 'riff raff', as you referred to them earlier, so I think it should be safe for a few minutes."

They passed through the front doors and the inside of the casino was blissfully cool. "Good, 'cause I need a drink."

Kaidan grinned. "Shot of whiskey? Beer? Mind Fish? What can I get you?"

She snorted. "Water, thanks."

"You sure?" he asked in disbelief. "I think I heard them say they were serving Thessian temples..."

"Yeah, let's get me drunk at the charity ball where everyone has come to see me... As tempting as that is, water is fine," she said jokingly as she tried to avoid spilling her secret in such a public setting.

"Just never seen you turn down a whiskey before, Shepard," Kaidan said with a shrug as he wandered off to get her water.

Traynor appeared at her side sporting the epitome of little black dresses and hugging a data pad to her chest. "Already crunching numbers I see," Shepard said, indicating the datapad. "You might wanna stop hugging your tech and show off some cleavage. There's bound to be some pretty little ladies here who would like a look at you. You look great by the way."

The black dress went well with her dark skin and black hair. She had brushed on a small bit of eye shadow and pulled her hair back off her face in an old fashioned french twist accented with tiny jeweled hair pins. "You don't think it's too much?" Traynor said, tugging nervously on the dress to scoot it further down toward her knees.

"This whole party is too much," Shepard said with a sigh as she glanced around at all of the people who had begun to notice she'd arrived. She took Samantha's arm and pulled her with her as she headed for somewhere to sit. "Come on, let's find a seat at the quazar wall. Maybe I won't stick out like a sore thumb." Why was it so damned hot after the cool entry room?

Kaidan intercepted them with her drink. Traynor slipped from her grasp and smiled. "As much as I would love to help you both loose and raise money, Commander, I'm am very busy tonight. Should I let Garrus know you're here?"

"Only if you bump into him," Shepard waved her off and Kaidan stayed with her. She took a sip from the glass and sighed at the ice water. "That is heaven."

"It's water, Shepard," he said with a smirk.

She shrugged and headed for the quazar machines and dropped unceremoniously onto the stool. "Hide me, Kaidan. It's too hot for mingling."

"I dunno, Shepard. It seems cool to me. Are you feeling all right?" Kaidan asked, his concern flooding his face again. "You still look a little flushed."

The baby twisted in her gut and she flinched, playing it off as a shrug. She couldn't tell Kaidan she was nauseous, he'd want to know why, so she sipped her water and attempted to rid herself of the lump still in her dry throat. After few minutes, she felt slightly better and allowed Kaidan to parade her around the casino as she plastered on a smile and greeted hundreds of people. She could not shake the feeling that the night was going far too well. She had honestly been expecting to be shot at by now. She ran into a few of her friends, taking the time to relax in between parades to sit and chat with some of them. James was there with Ann, Steve was mingling by the bar, Jacob and Brynn were having a fun night without Jake, Dr. Chakwas and Miranda were loosing poorly at Roulette, and Liara had shown up in a racy Asari style dress with Javik on her arm sporting a tailored tuxedo and stealing the spotlight momentarily from Shepard which gave her a moment to find Garrus. She sidled up behind him and bumped him with her hip. "Hey, have you seen a sexy Turian around here? About yay high, ruggedly handsome, scars on his face?" She asked, reaching up to put her hand up to his forehead.

He turned and grinned at her, his eyes taking in the dress and her carefully done hair and make-up. "That depends," he hummed in approval. "Was he also the luckiest Turian in the room?"

"I dunno. I haven't seen him play craps yet," she giggled as he stole a short hug while all eyes were still on Liara.

"I haven't seen you all day. I missed you," he said softly after glancing around and making sure they were out of ear shot.

"I'm exhausted. Can this night be over soon?" she sighed as she received another jab to the ribs. "I just wanna curl up beside you and go to sleep." she hugged herself, standing with her shoulders hunched so her stomach wasn't on display.

"You've been worrying about this party since Nasryna thought it up," he said, boldly placing his hands on her shoulders and cocking his head. "Don't work yourself up." he gently squeezed and then released her, knuckling her chin playfully. "It'll be over soon. Just go look pretty. We'll handle the rest for once."

"Liara's lucky," Shepard complained. "Look what she gets to wear."

He chuckled. "Her day will come."

Shepard idly scratched at her side as she watched him move away to mingle, turning his Archangel charm on a group of Asari. "If you're not careful, people will notice your protruding abdomen, Shepard," a familiar voice said as a pair of heels clicked up behind her.

She spun, her eyes wide as she put a face to the voice and excitement swirled in her chest. "Samara!" She closed the space between them, hugging the Justicar.

Samara let out a gentle chuckle before saying, "It is good to see you too, Shepard. You're looking... well."

"You hesitated... Is it my hair?" she asked, touching a hand to the intricate whatever Kasumi had crafted on her head. "Never mind. When did you get back?"

"Just yesterday. Liara informed me of this ball and I wanted to be certain that the Justicars were represented and our support for the new council shown," Samara explained in her usual sultry voice. She had traded in her skin tight red metal scale one piece armor set for a long dress in a similar style down the front, her belly button peeking out of the slit. The deep purple shade of the fabric stood out drastically against the light blue of her skin. "I see there is more news that Liara failed to mention."

"Did she tell you _she_ was pregnant?" Shepard asked, shifting to cross her arms again, but fighting the impulse. She needed to be careful with her mannerisms.

"I am farther out of the loop than I know, it seems," Samara said with a smile. "No matter. When are you due?"

Shepard bit her lip. "Liara is due in another nine months..." She lowered her voice. "As for me, I have absolutely no clue." She let out a short bark of laughter as that new feeling of dread took hold in her stomach again and she felt woozy.

Samara's hand wrapped around her arm. "Shepard?"

"Fine. I'm fine," she said, swallowing the lump in her throat. "I think I'm coming down with something."

"Your skin is hot and your face has gone pale. Come. Sit down," Samara began to lead her off towards the tables nearby.

"No," she said softly. "I'm all right." Her side was itching again and her fingers suddenly went numb. "Oh no... Shit... No, I don't need to sit down. I need Garrus. Right now."

She returned Samara's grip, her eyes wide. Samara casually walked beside her, letting Shepard lean her weight lightly on her as the tingling in her fingers worsened. When they found Garrus near the digital varren race tables, the room was starting to spin. Samara got his attention and Shepard saw him rush to their side. "What happened?" he asked sharply, his subs trilling with worry.

"I need my Epipen," she managed to say around her suddenly foggy thoughts, knowing he carried her spare with him all of the time. She had nowhere to store hers, so she had left it home.

"Spirits!" he gasped, as she stepped away from Samara and stumbled into him.

A sharp prick in her neck drew her attention back to the here and now and she reached up to touch it. "Hey, ow, what was that for?" she scolded him, then shaking off the strange feeling as she heard him tell Samara to find Miranda. As she leaned against him, her skin against his felt like it was on fire and she tried to pull away but when her legs didn't support her, he caught her with a string of fearful curses. Then she was being carried and her vision swam and blurred around the edges. The next thing she remembered was being in a car, crammed in with too many people, her head on his lap as he hummed with worry.

* * *

 

The first new sensation she felt was the reassuring fluttering of movement in her womb. She laid on her back and kept her eyes closed, allowing the world to slowly reform around her. She heard Miranda's thick accent as she spoke softly and the familiar buzz of Garrus' subs nearby. If she had allowed him in the room apparently the emergency was over. "So far, the dextro amino acids have been contained inside the placenta, the umbilical cord acting as a filter for the toxins between her and the fetus. During our examination, we discovered mild bleeding and when we looked further, we found there was a minor placental abruption. The fact that the small leak of amniotic fluid sent her into anaphylaxis is actually a good thing. It allowed us to catch the abruption in time before it progressed. So far, the baby is in no distress, and true to her nature, Shepard is healing well."

"What could have caused this?" Garrus asked, his deep rumbling voice just as soothing as ever.

"According to what we saw on the ultrasound, the fetus and Shepard's womb seen to be having a pissing contest to put it bluntly," Miranda said, the smile on her face evident in her tone.

Garrus chuckled. "That sounds about right."

"In other words, it seems that the baby may have taken Shepard's DNA to get started, but for all intents and purposes, it is Turian. Since Shepard is human, her body is responding to the accelerated gestation signals the only way it knows how. By accelerating the growth of her womb. That is giving the placenta more room than it needs to expand and she is developing polyhydramnious, which is an overabundance of amniotic fluid. That is what caused the separation from the uterine wall."

"You sure know a lot of big words, Miri," Shepard said, around her dry tongue.

"Ah, you're awake," Miranda said, moving into view beside Shepard as she pried her eyes open. She was still wearing her bright red evening gown, but her elegant elbow length gloves had been replaced by a pair of latex exam gloves. "Don't sit up," she scolded before Shepard even thought to try. "How do you feel?"

Shepard licked her lips and grimaced. "Thirsty and sore," she said as the mild ache in her abdomen swam into focus along with Garrus' face as he stood behind Miranda, not quite hovering by the med bay door. "Hey, Big Guy." She smiled weakly.

"You know they nearly had to put me in the room next door for cardiac arrest," he said, the Turian approximation of amusedly pursed lips forming on his face as he fought to keep his mandibles close to his face, his arms crossed over his chest. "And I'm pretty sure the entire galaxy is aware of your condition."

"Yay!" she said sarcastically, throwing her nearly limp arms up to wave her hands in mock joy as Miranda plunked a straw into a glass of water and held it out to her. "So did I ruin the event?"

Garrus snorted as Miranda moved out of the way and he pulled up a chair to sit beside her. "Hardly. According to Traynor, after your 'collapse', the profits doubled. She also asked me to tell you that you're a 'horrible friend' for not telling her."

Shepard rolled her eyes as she sipped her water. "With all of the emails of mine that she reads, you'd have thought she would have seen at least one or two that mentioned it."

He laughed. "Apparently she passes over the ones from people she knows."

"Any other 'well wishers' I should know about?" she asked, laughing lightly until the movement made her stomach sore and she cut it off with a small groan.

"There's a line outside the door if you're up for company," he said, leaving the decision up to her.

"Miranda, can you guys prop me up or something?" After a slight narrowing of her eyes, Miranda huffed and agreed, adjusting the tilt on the bed and gathering a few extra pillows so Shepard could sit up without having to use her sore muscles. "Okay, Garrus. Release the hounds," she said with a grin as he handed her water back to her.

Shepard felt better and better by the minute as her friends came in and gathered around her with varying degrees of annoyance and intrigue and straight up worry. Most of the annoyance was quickly replaced with relief that she was okay. "Yeah, you know... I knew something was off," Kaidan grumbled. "I shoulda known when you turned down the whiskey."

"I wanted to tell you all, it's just... even with her insistence that she didn't mind, I felt like I was stepping on Liara's toes," Shepard admitted.

"We'll forgive you this once, Lola," James said with a grin. "But from now on I'm carrying one of those pen things until this is over with."

"She was _supposed_ to have one of her own," Garrus chided with a pointed glance at her.

"I've been fine... all this time. And I knew you had one, and I had nowhere to put it. You saw that dress," she grumbled, crossing her arms.

"You're just lucky that you're naturally mostly dextro immune," Brynn said in her soft accent.

"I've been in countless firefights and goodness knows what else, to be laid out by allergies," Shepard mused.

"Welcome to _my_ life," Tali said with a smirk in her tone.

The med bay door slid open and Jack stomped in and stopped in the middle of the floor, crossing her arms. "What the _actual_ fuck, Shepard?" She was dressed in an extra revealing black leather dress with her usual combat boots buckled underneath it, more of her tattoos than usual showing on her thighs through a slit up the side of the dress. "I was on my way to being fashionably late to this fucking shindig when I had to hear on the radio in my cab that you had 'collapsed due to unknown pregnancy complications'," she shrieked, her voice cracking as she used air quotes around the reporters' words. "And shit if it isn't true," she gestured at Shepard's obvious condition. "Am I the only fucking person who didn't know about this?"

"Simmer down, Jack," Miranda sighed.

"Screw you, Cheerleader. I was talking to Shepard, but your bubbly butt looks good in that dress," she said slipping the compliment inside the insult sandwich.

Shepard couldn't help the chuckle and snort that escaped her at Jack's words. "You weren't the only one who didn't know, Jack. In fact you probably aren't the last to know either. Everyone here was either at the party or on the ship when they brought me here."

"Yeah, I didn't know either," Joker complained. "And I'm supposed to be her oldest friend."

Jack glanced back and forth between Shepard and Garrus and then down over Shepard's person and back up before both her stance and her voice softened. "So, everything's okay, right?"

Jack's cheeks flushed as she showed her concern in front of so many others and Shepard nodded. "I'm fine."

Then the vulnerability snapped back into it's box and Jack crossed her arms again, smirking. "So, that's two fingers you've given to biology."

Shepard shrugged. "Essentially, but only one of them was on purpose."

"Nobody flips a bird by accident, Shepard," Jack said.

* * *

 

Some of the others took off, and even more slowly petered out leaving her alone with Garrus. His hand was grasping hers lightly as he slowly caressed back and forth over her knuckles. She drew his attention by simply speaking. "You know I totally found the best excuse to get out of that party."

He chuckled softly. "I'd really appreciate not having a repeat performance if that's all right with you."

"So did I hear Miranda say our baby is fully Turian?" she asked with a frown.

"For all intents and purposes," he repeated. "I didn't see the ultrasound, so I don't know what that entails."

She hummed thoughtfully as his subs started their melodic purring. She leaned her head back onto the pillow and sighed contentedly. "Little V likes that," she whispered, her eyes closing as the baby responded to Garrus' vocalizations. She heard him shift beside her and then felt his hand gently lay flat on her stomach. She smiled and blindly reached down to shift it over to where she felt the movement. "Right there," she said softly, leaving her hand on top of his.

She knew the second he felt the small movement as his subs shifted. "That's... both astonishing and a little weird... What does that feel like to you?" he asked with a chuckle under his voice.

"Sometimes it's subtle, like butterflies in your stomach, but other times, it's like... someone's hosting a kung-fu movie marathon in your gut, but all of the fighters are fighting from inside those giant inflatable hamster balls that we saw in that vid," she said with a snort.

He laughed out loud. "You just put all of the best poets to shame, Shepard. That's an image I am never going to be able to scrub from my brain. Thanks."

"You are very welcome," she said teasingly.

She was already starting to doze, her hand slipping from his when he rumbled softly. "Get some rest, Shepard. I'll be here."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been taking a hiatus from this fic in lieu of writing a few others. I promise Shepard and her crew will return soon once I figure out life lol


End file.
